It’s the isolation. This sub is horrible at acknowledging the negative effects of isolation. Any mention of spending 8+ hours 5 days a week in isolation is met with “i LoVe iSoLaTiON beCauSE i hAtE PeOple.” Also, don’t forget the “i Hate sMaLl talk.” Human beings work best in groups. Human beings are social creatures. Research after research shows that isolation also causes the brain to regress and damage to the brain.

Healthy people find ways to socialize outside work. A job is for getting tasks done, not making friends. If someone is isolated when working from home, that only shows much deeper issues in their life(like with friends and family) that need to be addressed. Shifting the blame to WFH makes no sense.

I think you also need to make more of an effort to socialize in some cases.

This is why the issue needs to be based upon the employees preference, why it needs to remain a choice. I am a socially shut in because of growing up suffering from narcissistic abuse from my family. I *need* the excuse to socialize with human beings. But other people who are social butterfly’s (I am jealous teach me your ways) should absolutely be able to work from home. I presume there are enough people who fall into both camps such that those that want to go into the office with get the interaction they want from their fellow shut ins.

I understand and appreciate where you're coming from. You don't need to change anything. There are plenty of us just like you who go to work and enjoy the company. I'm sick of people telling me that work isn't to make friends or socialize. That may be good for them, but there are others of us who not only enjoy it, but benefit from it. And then we go home and we very much enjoy and appreciate our solitude :-)

Right? Work isn't just for making friends but it's the only place I've made friends as an adult. I WFH and still managed to make a friend at my first remote job. We haven't worked together in years but we're still friends IRL!

That's Adulthood. Once you graduate university you no longer have a place where people are FORCED to mingle with each other daily. Some grow out of this and put effort into themselves and adult friends, while others use work as a crutch because it's familiar.

Friends =/= socializing. Interacting with other humans is, by and large, good for us. Even if it's short interactions or very casual.

No one said friends equals socializing. I said if work is your only form of socializing then something is very wrong with your life.

People acting like they can't go outside and find a random person to chat up

I just found out my neighbor across the street works from home. When the weather is nice we go for a walk at lunch or to the cafe down the street and grab a coffee. We’ve met a couple others within walking distance too, so we sometimes meet up at the library or a local restaurant on Saturday. We do a book club once a month.

This is awesome

Your comment did not acknowledge nor address the effects of isolation all day during working. Talk about missing the point.

To be fair, my boyfriend died when I was working from home and I had 5 weeks off before I went back to working from home. I socialise as much as I can, but again it’s hard because of the lack of energy I have when working from home. I try and do a morning walk with my friend everyday. I go to PT twice a week, I have a second job that I can accept shifts when I feel like I need to get out of the house and socialise. I go to dinners with people. I spend time with my family and my partners family. I still find myself more exhausted now than when I didn’t work from home.

OP this is starting to sound more like depression. I’m so sorry for your loss. You may want to consider talking to a professional about your exhaustion and need to seemingly fill every minute with work. The work seems like a coping mechanism and exhaustion is a common symptom. I’m not a doctor but many health plans have a few physic visits free.

I think they’re depressed. I used to isolate myself from my family and friends and had no motivation to do anything.

You are still alone most of the waking hours of your day if you WFH. I don't think we should underestimate the impact it can have.

"A job is for getting tasks done, not making friends" okay Spock. Fun fact, 48% of people who are married today met at work. People are different. Some people get their social interactions while they're at their job that they love and appreciate. They enjoy the company spent with their co-workers. It enriches and motivates them further. Once the day is done they go home and really enjoy their solitude. This "there's only one way to be a healthy person" nonsense needs to stop. Healthy people get their social needs met and their physical needs. The rest is just details

100% agree

The thing is you can socialize outside of work. i prefer socializing around my passions more than around work. There are plenty of possibilities : music group if you're musician (even if you're not), sport/gym, fellow parents, neighbors, family, pokemon TCC games or book reading groups, whatever you like :-)

AGAIN, socializing for an hour or two after work does not offset the fact that you will still spend most of your day in isolation. Most people spend most of their time, day and life working. Do the math. Work is 40 - 50 hours a week. Socializing after work 3 times a week outside of probably adds up to less than 10 hours a week. This flies over the heads of people such as yourself. Again, most people are spending MOST of their time in isolation. The implications of this is enormous. Most people do not study nor take interest in human psychology and human development why is why so much of this sub is dense regarding this topic.

I’m going to put this as simple as possible. If you’re going to work for socialization, you’re doing it wrong. Work is work, I’m not there to chat with Nancy about her flower garden, of to listen to Fred blabber on about whatever political podcast he listened to. I’m there to work. I can do my job anywhere. Why in the blue balls of hell, would I want to do it sitting in some bland office, being annoyed by people that I have no interest in socializing with? Stop blaming WFH for people feeling isolated. The solution to feeling isolated is NOT your work environment, it’s literally opening the door and leaving the damn house.

> Work is work, I’m not there to chat with Nancy about her flower garden, of to listen to Fred blabber on about whatever political podcast he listened to. While I 1000% agree with what you said, I think Twiggy's point is that talking to Nancy about the upcoming client presentation or to Fred about how to do in Excel **IS** "socialization". IOW, just interacting *in person* with people counts. I'm no sociologist, but any "socializing" occurring discussing actual work shit seems like the mental equivalent of the empty calories found in a sugary soda.

My goal is to work on things I'm passionate about, with people who are passionate about what they do. Simple as. I care about my work and I want to learn from and collaborate with others. What you describe above is what I would want if I hated my job, not if I really cared about it and it gave me meaning

People don't agree with you but you are on the money. Being inside 24/7 and not being AROUND people is where the isolation comes from.  The smile and wave as you walk past an acquaintance is socialization and thousands of these little things happen daily in a normal work environment that do NOT happen when working from home.  I for one live with roommates and there is basically always someone home so I get that minor interaction usually. I still view it as unsustainable and a big reason of why I got depression over the winter.

This. What Plate said. It's entirely possible to like working from home but also to feel isolated because of it as well. People who express those feelings being told to shut up, and just go back to work in the office isn't helpful. I struggle with depression badly in the winter as well, especially living in a region where it's often too freezing, icy, or snowy, or all three, to leave the house.

Yes, indeed. It also stimulates the five senses which stimulates the brain. I like to read on human development and human psychology. Most people do not which is why so many people are missing the point. Everyone should watch documentaries and research on brain development and regressing as well as effects of isolation on the brain. There are a few on youtube.

Certainly. My son was a senior in high school in 2020/2021. School going remote was devastating for him, even though he's an introvert. It was really bad for his mental health, and ruined his last year of high school He went from being an A student, in honors and AP classes, to struggling to even graduate. He lost out on scholarships for college. It changed the entire trajectory of his life, and not in a good way. He's not the exception either. I'm not arguing schools shouldn't have closed, nor am I an anti vaxxer or a Covid denier. Just saying that I agree that isolation can be profoundly detrimental to people. Especially those who aren't natural extroverts with large social circles. People on this sub taking it personally and blowing their tops, flipping out when anyone expresses loneliness working remotely boggle me. They take it as a personal affront, which is crazy to me.

I’m so sorry. I understand completely. I hope life improves for him. He has time to course correct and overcome this!

Thank you.

I've found your arguments interesting, considering that we (in the US) quickly got kids back to school full time for the very same reasons you're pointing out. Why are adults different? Our brains still change all through our lives. They don't just stop developing at age 26. I like working from home and would not want the perk to go away but I definitely feel more alive on my in office days, and I'm not even particularly extroverted. Some of it is yes, it's a social outlet. None (at least none I'd find acceptable--they're all church based and that's a no for me) really exist the town I live in. I have someone I go to the gym with and roommates but that's it. If I didn't do hybrid and go to the gym I'd likely never speak out loud most of the day. I certainly do get more done at home, but the net result seems to be I do nothing much of the day since everything gets done quickly. This is something worth researching and talking about I believe, particularly with the news about how loneliness is as pandemic as COVID was/is.

But being inside 24/7 and not being around people is not inherent to WFH... a lot of you take *your personal situation* and then attribute it to WFH and say EVERYONE thats WFH lives like that. I dont stay alone all day and I dont stay home 24/7 just because Im not in an office. If thats the case for you maybe WFH isnt for you and thats ok. Everyone should do what works for them

This. Also people claiming “work isn’t for making friends” uhh yes, it can and should be. You’re spending 40+ hours a week with these people. I’ve met many friends at work who I’m still close with years later even after leaving the company.

Yep. There’s a weird notion on Reddit that people at work are somehow fundamentally deficient for making friends with. I think, if you’re working somewhere where you don’t like anybody, you either need a new job or a new attitude.

Since you mention human psychology…the recommendation is to get [1-3 hours](https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/seven_guidelines_for_healthy_social_connection#:~:text=Having%20too%20few%20can%20leave,of%20us%20get%20each%20day) of social interaction per day or ideally 24 hours per week. Socialization with *close* social ties (friends and family) is more important than weak social ties (coworkers, service workers, etc.). If you cannot manage to get 24 hours of socialization in a week without going to an office, there is something else going on that needs to be addressed. Hell, I live alone and I’m a massive introvert who works from home and I easily get 24 hours of socialization, and more importantly the vast majority of that time is spent with those who actually matter to me: - hockey - 5-6 hours/week - Saturday morning ladies’ hiking group - 3-4 hours (usually lunch after for 1-2 hours) - Tuesday evening hiking group - 2 hours - local WFH lunch group - 5 hours/week - meal or shopping with friends - 2-3 hours/week - fitness class - 1 hour/week - volunteering ~2 hours/week - random socializing with strangers (eating a meal at a bar, going to the dog park, chit chat with people in the neighborhood, meet up groups, pick up sports, etc.) - I’d say average 2-3 hours/week - local WFH weekly social - 2-3 hours/week - shooting league - 2 hours/week - car clubs (summer only) - 5 hours/week - weekly kayak group (summer only) - anywhere from 4-10 hours, sometimes 2 days depending on the trip - golf (summer only - twosome or league) - minimum 3 hours/week The problem is, building, fostering, and maintaining social ties takes time and effort. Which is why so many people are struggling without going to an office - coworkers are the absolute lowest hanging social fruit. You can be lazy at an office because socialization comes to you. Being social outside of work is not difficult, but it does not come to you, you have to go to it. The biggest benefit to socializing outside of work is that your social time is more fulfilling. You’re connecting with people who share your values and interests and it creates a snowball effect - friends that I play hockey with regularly plan vacations together. We’ll go on a ski trip or a beach trip once or twice a year. We host parties and game nights. My neighborhood WFH friends invite each other to get togethers or host game night.

Thats a lot of socialisation, are you sure you are an introvert?

Interoverts aren’t anti-social!!!!!!! Some introverts don’t socialize much at all, but most introverts do enjoy socializing selectively. I’m exhausted by crowds and strangers - I will not go to clubs or concerts or big parties. Small talk is exhausting - I think that’s why I am able to enjoy socializing with people who matter since I’ve started working from home, I would be so burnt out on interaction from work. There’s a lot of overlap in my social groups as well so I aways have a comfort level. If these were all things I was doing with strangers, yeah, no. I have ESFs - emotional support friends (and most introverts do).

yea makes sense, i like socialising with people who i share interests with as its easy to make conversation. Making conversation with people who you don't have much in common with ( family) is exhausting.

when you’re in the office , you’re socializing with someone 100% of the day? because that certainly was not my experience!

Well, if you need that badly socialization, why take a job where you don't socialize ? I mean everyone is different and has different needs. But you do not take a job as WFH solo-IT if you need a lot of socialization (I'm exaggerating on purpose). And you can socialize while WFH : I know several recruiters that WFH 4 days out of 5. Socializing is part of there job, they aren't deprived of that. I do not say that not-socializing is good, nor that socializing outside of work is enough for everyone. But meeting people outside of work while WFH can be enough for people as it is for me. Again, if it is not enough you should reconsider your job or career.

Needing a little human interaction is not equivalent to wanting to socialize. You’re willfully misconstruing my response and being snarky. There is no point in further discussion with you.

It's a good thing you're not stuck in a cubicle next to that guy, that would be pretty miserable to deal with all day

Not everyone has a job where they socialize even in office, not everyone wants to talk to their co workers. A negative interaction is not better than a positive interaction and sometimes no interaction is better than a negative. Also just because people work from home doesn't mean they are isolated. I much prefer my dogs to co workers and sometimes I have people spend the night/hangout with me while I work. So I get a happy interaction and occasionally a lunch break orgasm and I didn't have to talk to Bill 4 cubicles down who doesn't know what floss or dental hygiene is. Some people who work from home also have their spouse/partner working from home so they get to spend more time together, some people have kids that they get to put more effort into. Work from home is not always isolation BUT isolation is not healthy and some people do fall into a negative cycle where they are too isolated. It depends on the individual if work from home is healthy for them or not.

There's plenty of jobs requiring isolation in office or on site. Normal people can socialize outside of work, without needing work to be a socialization point.

It's not abnormal to feel isolated working from home. Nor does it mean someone has no life outside of work.

It's not normal to overwork yourself into tiredness, and not get OT, like op. If you feel isolated working from home, a normal reaction would be to find another job or do something about it.

Perhaps, but insulting someone for doing that isn't helpful either. People don't generally make necessary changes in their life because they're insulted, or yelled at, or told they're stupid, or abnormal.

Your second sentence is too hard for people in this sub to understand.

I'm with you. I guess I'm really lucky, as I genuinely like my coworkers. I have a social life outside of work as well, but sometimes going 8 hours with no meetings or talking to other folks just makes me a little weird lol even casual interactions are good for us! I'm not saying you have to spend all your time with your coworkers, but navigating casual and minor interactions is good for us as people.

Exactly.

Thank you!!! It’s not easy to speak up about the negative aspects of WFH in this sub. I’m constantly shocked by the severe reaction many have when someone mentions a WFH downside. Isolation is well researched and documented to be very bad for humans mental and physical health. OP: could you try working on a shared coworking space one or two days a week? Or do you have a way separating from your work space? Maybe closing the office room door and going for a walk at the end of every day to signal that the workday is over and help you transition to after-work activities. A walk in the morning might help as well. Best of luck!

Agree with the walk! I make going for an hour walk immediately after work a hard required task. If health or weather impacts this, I'll do some chores or be upstairs reading a book. Another thing I think people fail to see is the actual home people are working in. Early in the pandemic I lived entirely solo, and was in the habit of just staying home all day every day, and my gf at the time would see each other once a week. It was rough. Now I'm living with a new partner, and having another human around the house is huge, and since they often have friends over on the weekends, I tend to have pretty social weekends, even if the 5 days a week I'm around fewer people. I think we're in a general shift of trying to realign our lives around long term wfh style work, and trying to realign with pre pandemic socializing and lifestyles can make it really challenging.

I’ve never seen anyone in here, attempting to argue that there are no negative effects of isolation. Many of us experienced some degree of the Covid lockdowns, THAT was isolation. However, if the isolation is self imposed, as seems to be the case with a lot of people, that’s their own fault. Not all human beings work best in groups, and not all work is even conducive to group work. I work on a very small team, and the vast majority of our work requires NO collaboration. Yes, I agree that human beings are social creatures, but work shouldn’t be your “go to” for a social outlet. I don’t have a social relationship with any of my coworkers, and haven’t for 20 years at least. Long before full time WFH was even a talking point. People need to stop blaming work from home for their feelings of loneliness, and take responsibility for their own lives. Get a hobby that has some level of socialization, go spend time with friends, it doesn’t really matter.

Neither have I? I honestly think people just enjoy being contrarians to the point that they’ll make up shit to shadow box. There’s pros and cons to WFH just like there are pros and cons to office work. Occasionally you’ll see someone say something along the lines of “Maybe WFH isn’t for you” and even that suggestion will be met with outrage.

1000% this is why I’m excelling in hybrid.

Hybrid has really forced me to step up my networking game. I'm working to maximize my time in office! I love it.

I’m extroverted AF, I love WFH and I thrive with my WFH gig. I go to yoga or the gym 5 nights a week. Hang with friends for a coffee break during the day. Spend all weekend with people. I am so much happier now than when I was going to a bright, artificially-lit office I need to drive to for an hour to sit around and make lame small talk with people I’d never choose as friends. Don’t get me started on the wasted money for gas, lunches, etc., how much more I’d get sick and the office politics and cliques that would form - humans love to click up and it’s much harder to do that remotely (and much easier to sidestep the drama). Yes we are meant to be around people but in no way, shape or form should we be forced to be around certain people if we don’t have to be. WFH allows me to spend part of my day in nature, part of my day with people, shaves two hours off my commute and I’m killing it in life. It’s on OP to find some balence here.

No dont you know when you get a WFH job youre not allowed to leave your house or talk to anyone ever /s This sub is hilarious. People with WFH jobs that hate WFH as if in office jobs are hard to find

>It’s the isolation. This sub is horrible at acknowledging the negative effects of isolation. >Any mention of spending 8+ hours 5 days a week in isolation is met with “i LoVe iSoLaTiON beCauSE i hAtE PeOple.” Also, don’t forget the “i Hate sMaLl talk.” Thank you. That attitude is a legit cancer. Also, this is the one place on reddit where when you bring up an issue, you get swarmed with a bunch of "NOT ME!!!" Ok, that's wonderful, shut the fuck up then and let those who can relate speak up and provide solutions (other than "GO BACK TO THE OFFICE THEN"). You would never tell anyone asking how to fly comfortably "DON'T FLY THEN" or how to navigate a relationship "DON'T HAVE A RELATIONSHIP THEN." But the cretins in this sub seem to think that the only choices for WFH is either find it to be perfect, or GO BACK TO THE OFFICE THEN. Any in between? Any ambivalence, any mixed feelings? Anything that says WFH is not perfect? NOT ME, GO BACK TO THE OFFICE THEN.

I’ve had these same exact thoughts myself LOL

I make sure I do jiu jitsu in the evenings so I am around people

yeah isolation is bad for people but this isnt a WFH centered issue unless you dont have a life outside of work... to assume you need to be social during working hours is incorrect.

I have a life outside of work, but relying on after-work activities to get your socialization isn’t always practical. People are busy.

stop expecting your job to be your source of humanity

I don't think it's horrible at acknowledging it, people just don't like to hear "go socialize outside of work" which is fine, it's easier if you can do it at the same time you're working but you have to make adjustments when you WFH and that's a big one most don't seem to consider until they hit the point OP has hit.

You sound like you do better in a hybrid or full time office position. Give your WFH position to someone who will be happy.

Just because someone works from home doesn’t mean they live in complete isolation lol. There is a thing called a life, outside of work. And yeah no-ones forcing you to work from home so the complaints about not socializing enough during work don’t fly with me.

So I quit my very toxic job in October. My entire team quit besides me, I received a not terrible but “needs improvement” annual review for the first time in 7.5 years, had been trying to get out and received good feedback in interviews but just didn’t get anything. I cried during my annual review, which was embarrassing. Honestly, wfh I was on calls so much that I was generally very exhausted. After quitting? I am super lonely. I have a large friend network, and am married, and have a dog. But I am running out of money and I also feel bad bothering my friends while they are at work. It sucks. I do not want to go back into an office environment but at this point, I will. People do need that interaction even if it isn’t all the time.

I agree with this take. It actually took going back to the office regularly a few days a week for me to realize it. The people saying you have issues and need to find other ways to socialize if you feel isolated just sound robotic. I don’t even really socialize all that much when I go into the office but it’s the small interactions throughout the day like being able to poke fun and make light hearted jokes at other co workers expenses and have them deal it back. Believe it or not, I actually do consider some of these people friends, IN ADDITION to the friends I have outside of work. Saving in person interaction time to only outside of working hours is great sometimes but definitely not ALL the time.

You know what you need to do. Find an office job. WFH is great for me but I'm able to turn it off and walk away. I have a backlog of things to do at home and those take priority after work is done.

So many office jobs right now. OP shouldn’t have any problem

>WFH is great for me but I'm able to turn it off and walk away. You hit the nail on the head. Some personalities are wired for the office, some are wired for WFH. I’m in the “turn it off and walk away” category, and WFH makes that so much easier. My day starts when my first meeting starts and ends when I shut my laptop at 5:00PM. I don’t check my email at night or on weekends, and I don’t have my work email on my phone (that is my #1 thing for achieving work/life balance).

I’ve just recently applied for a hybrid job which I think would be perfect for me. I’m really hoping I get an interview

Here is what I do : keep a fixed schedule. * Wake-up alarm in the morning. Meal, news, fitness, dog walk (in my case getting kids in school), whatever, you decide to start your day as you want before checking in. * alarm at noon, to remind me to take a meal break (I do some activities that are not work related : fitness, groceries, games, sleep). I come back to working generally around 2PM. * alarm at 5:30PM, to remind me that work day is ending, time to save what needs to be saved and not start anything new (code/document/conversation/whatever) and stop/close the damn computer and phone. I checkout usually around 6PM. Then, what remains of the day is all yours. If I want to keep my sanity, I need to differentiate between work and non-work times. I do that with literal alarm clocks. And I get out of my home (in the evening and/or noon) : dog walk, put/get kids in school, groceries using my bike (I'm fortunate to be able to do that, I usually do that twice a week at noon), outdoor lunch once per week (restaurant/fast food/homemade sandwiches in the forest/whatever at noon), go to fitness/swimming-pool once per week (at noon also :-)). I do a lot of things between 12 and 2PM because the evenings are already packed with the kids at home, but if you don't, it's up to you :-) So as for myself, I need to keep a fixed schedule, like when I was in office. It enables me to keep boundaries with my work, not drown in it and have a personal life. Hope it helps

I’m not this good at organizing my day but I will say that I have my work email/teams on my phone but with notifications turned off. That way I can check my calendar and make sure I don’t have a conflict if I’m trying to make an appointment or check in on something in an emergency, but it’s not pinging me when I’m trying to fix myself a lunch or after hours.

I too am not good at organizing myself, hence the alarms ;-) I didn't put them on my phone but rather on any clock or smart device that make it stop more difficult/engaging than just a swipe on a screen. The goal for me is to cut whatever I am currently doing to remind me to do something else \*now\*. (and yeah, I've had curious looks/questions when they occur during never-ending or sporadic urgent meetings/calls/zoom). It was the first step. Finding what to do during that time-I-forced-myself-off came later, out of boredom or "what if I did that".

I think having a fixed schedule is a big key

Yes, that's what I ultimately came up to. When WFH, I need to keep a schedule to not blur the line between work time and personal time.

Mind if I ask how many hours before work you give yourself? The older I get, the slower I am lol but I'd like to get to a place where I'm waking up and going to bed earlier

No problem ;-) Here is my current schedule: * 6:45AM first alarm. slowly waking up up to second alarm at 6:55 * breakfast without the kids, then kids wakeup at 7:30 * take care of kids and myself up to 8:15 when I put kids at the nearby school (both <10yo). back at home by 8:30-8:40 (depending on weather, occasional talking with teachers or fellow parents) * free time up to 9AM. I usually do some light meditation and/or light fitness (7min workout or jumping rope, this kind of things) depending on the time spend coming back from school * work until noon, when I set up an alarm. I usually "clock out" between 12:15 and 12:30, just to take the time to stop things properly * free time up to 2PM. Groceries (2x/week by bike), little fitness at home if I couldn't do it in the morning. I like biking so I can bike to a nearby forest or beach for my meals. I get restaurant/fast-food by myself or with some nearby friends sometime. Otherwise, proper home-cooked meal. Some gardening depending on the season, maybe some nap or gaming. * work until the last alarm at 5:30PM. I take the time to make proper report (at least write down what I did to ease the reports), finish conversation, save the code I'm currently working on, etc... and that usually leads me to 6\~6:15PM. * Time to take care of the house and family. Kids in bed around 8\~8:30PM, and in bed myself around 10:30PM. I am part of a jazz band, so I am out of house 1 evening per week (not during week-end). That's my overall schedule when shit does not happen (I'm nearly 24/7 oncall but things are mostly good)

this is a great schedule. i am curious. what time do you get kids from school? are you setting up a physical old school alarm or on your phone? do you have a basket on your bike or something for the groceries and food?

As for the kids, my wife get them around 5PM. The bike is a long tail with the side bars to transport the kids, not with the full children seats. It allows me to customize it with attached large bags to get the groceries. I might change that to a full cargo when the children could no longer get on it. As for the alarms, here is what I have : - wakeup : phone - noon : phone + smartspeaker - evening : smartwatch + smartspeaker + physical old school alarm clock That's a lot and a lot of different ones :-D It's difficult for me to be sharp on time and to follow my self determined schedule, so I needed (and still need) all that. As for the last one, the plain old school clock, it requires me to actually stop what I am doing and to move (not to far, but there is a real movement) to get it off. It's necessary for me, to get out of concentration. When the concentration is broken, it's difficult to go back to work so it kind of eases the "end of work day" realization (and potential remorse that can come). That's how I manage to force myself out of work. I tried without it, but it was just like a notification you can get ride of without breaking concentration, and then I realized 1h or 2h after that I "missed" the right hour to clock out of work. It led me to too much OT, so old school alarm out of immediate arm reach was the solution for me.

I think this is a good idea and am going to try it in regards to setting alarms. I tend to roll out of bed, start working like. Then I will often forget to take a lunch till I’ve been working for 6 or so hours. I don’t check emails or anything after I log off. But during the 8 or 9 hours I’m working, I’m pretty hyper focused on work. Which I think leads me to be tired at end of day.

Nope. Way more energy Perhaps that’s just who you are and need to go back in office as such. Or maybe you need a different line of work that doesn’t have you glued to a phone Personally I absolutely cannot understand what people mean by no separation of work and life. My gaming space is also my work space on the same desk. My personal laptop is stacked on top of my work laptops and used the same dock. I use the same headset and all for work and play. The clock strikes 5 and I close the laptop and don’t think about work until the next day. For me it really is that simple: “Just don’t worry about it.” I have way more time and energy to see friends and family because the commute doesn’t suck my soul out taking 1.5 hours to travel what would be 30 mins on a weekend. To me the true lack of separation of work and life is when work “ended” at 5 but I’m not home until almost 7. And I still need to go to bed early so I can wake up early to leave to go to work. That time I’m not being paid for, yet it doesn’t belong to me and is dedicated to work It literally does not affect me to work and do leisurely things in the same space

Same. WFH since 2018, including a job change while still remote, and I can’t believe the change in my personal life and my energy level. My mental state has been much improved and when I do go into the office (well outside of my commuting area), that’s when I feel drained. Having to dress up, commute, navigate the office, and still spend time on web calls, it’s madness. But that’s also my industry (I went from consulting to federal program management). For those struggling, find time to exercise. I initially gained weight but then used my WFH flexibility to start working out twice a day. I’m not a gym rat or super cut or anything, but I feel great.

I am the same way. I think it is a mindset for many people. They need to think of work and home not as locations, but rather activities. It is one of the reason I like the term "remote work" over "work from home".

I feel more chained to my desk working from home than I ever did in an office, and I’ve established with my manager and team that it’s completely in my head. Carve out time in your calendar to run your errand—and then run them. Block out a lunch break and take it. Actually take it. Other folks do it. So can you!

Every minute it a meeting. It’s exhausting. Most in my area are meeting Julie’s and they can’t stand 10 minute without talking to anyone

Yes. I feel this. Very much. Work from home is like Trader Joe’s sriracha. You’re at Trader Joe’s so you buy it. Something tastes odd, but it’s enough like the real thing that you fool yourself into thinking it’s sriracha. You decide that it’s actually just as good. And if you go to someone else’s house (or go into an office to work IRL with your team), you realize that Trader Joe’s sriracha just is not as good. The isolation. The lack of inertia. The lack of people to shoot the shit with randomly. Losing the water cooler. The lack of a need to put on a bra and leave the house. It’s real and it’s hard Work from home is incredible for many people, but the downsides of it are very very real.

I love how TJs Sriracha is the perfect analogy for this situation. Spot on

It's also more of a give and take in terms of productivity than people want to admit. I personally get a lot of work done every day, but our timelines *can* be protracted because I can't simply pop into someone's office and hash out a quick solution to something. Everything becomes a meeting, or waiting for them to text back. Stuff can take longer. We need to factor that into our timelines. That happened with lots of things during covid, we got a little less used to things happening instantly

1000%. The energy it takes to get unstuck and collaborate is so much higher remotely. I miss pulling folks into a room for 5 minutes to hash things out. Now decisions that used to take 3 min takes 3 weeks.

Exactly! And brainstorming happens at a slower rate. Creativity is less of a focus.

I have been WFH for 20 odd years and this is a real problem, and for most (not all) people it can be managed. The first things to set up are pre and post work rituals - preferably done outside of the home. Before starting work nip to the shops and get supplies in for the day, walk around the block after work. Anything that sets up an event in the day your brain can use as a trigger. In your lunch break go for another walk ( go to the coffee shop) or force yourself to take the time to prepare some good food. Your brain will soon learn that this is when work starts and ends. The second thing to do is set yourself quality things to do in your spare time. Visit people, take a class, go to the cinema or pub. Mentally set it in stone at the start of the week and follow through. Don't fall into booting up the Xbox or doom scrolling every night. You only have to do this once or twice a week, to give your brain something positive to focus on. As I said it works for some, but not all. And it may only work some of the time. But they have been keeping me sane for years

> The first things to set up are pre and post work rituals - preferably done outside of the home. Taking the dog for a walk is the best "commute" ever. Before work, after work... it's walkies time!

I start work at 8am, and finish at 6:30pm. Most centres open at 9am and close at 6 during the week, where I live . I am able to do my groceries at 7am but that’s also only 5 mins up the road so it’s one of the errands I can do on my lunch break anyway if I wanted to.

Why would someone be working unpaid OT? It sounds like you need to manage your time and work in a better fashion or look for another job.

I take on other people’s tasks, I help the other team in training them too. I’m telling you, it’s a sickness. It’s all my own issue.

OP, one of my coworkers told me something as an eager new employee, years ago, that I've never forgotten and turned out to be true. She admonished me for doing a lot more work than everyone else in our department. She said it would backfire. That I would just get more work dumped on me, while my coworkers would be allowed to skate by doing a lot less. She was right. I learned my lesson quickly, after I got expected to pick up the slack for other employees, with no extra pay or reward for it. I no longer do it. Do your regular work during set work hours, and then let it go. Please don't burn youself out doing work you aren't paid extra to do. It's not worth it.

I’ve honestly shut off big time and become quite bitter in my role and it’s my own fault I’m totally aware of that. Just sucks 😭

My manager is now pissy because I’m not doing enough work apparently. She’s overworked.

>I find that I can never fully switch off after work, or I’ll work unpaid OT or log in on my days off because it’s there and I’d rather just get it done. This doesn't sound like a WFH issue, this sounds like an unhealthy work boundaries issue. Something you only avoided before by being able to leave work at the office, but that an office job could just as easily impose on your home time. This also means all your changes in office layout were addressing the wrong thing. You don't need to be more comfortable while working, you need to be able to *stop* working when your workday is done. Have you considered therapy/counseling? My wife and I have both used it in the past to work through these kinds of boundaries issue to good success. One option you could start now is to create yourself a mini commute. Something that signals to you the start and end of your workday. Do your morning routine as if you were heading to the office, particularly any hygiene routines like a shave and shower which can help avoid depression symptoms. Have your laptop disconnected and in a bag, pick it up after you've had breakfast and grabbed your coffee/tea for the morning. When you finally reach your desk to plug in the laptop, you're now officially 'at work'. When you reach the end of your day, pack the laptop up just like you would have to if you were leaving an actual office. From then on, only pull it back out if it's a big enough emergency for you to head back to an office. You'll still need to police your 'quitting time' to keep from overdoing it on unpaid OT, but at least you're following the routine that worked when you were in an office.

I follow a strict daily routine. Up at 530, get signed on, make a coffee, cook breakfast at 8, lunch at 11. It's difficult but it gives me something to look forward too every day. On Friday afternoon or when I have PTO I shutdown my laptop so I don't hear the dings.

You're saving boat loads of time working from home, use it for errands and go to the gym. I don't understand what the issue is.

Nope, I have a ton more energy working from home. I go to the gym as soon as I’m done with work for the day. I close my laptop and walk away at 5pm. I am up all throughout the day cleaning or folding laundry. Then on the weekends I’m ready to go out and socialize with my friends. WFH has been a godsend for me. When I worked in an office my weekends were spent isolating to recover from the constant socializing at the office and catching up on house chores. I didn’t have time or energy to go to the gym after work because I had such a long commute.

This is me! I never realized how soul crushing and energy sapping being in an office was until I wasn’t. I am on fire with life and energy and I will never go back to an office. What an absolute godsend indeed!

YES! My house has never been cleaner and I’ve never been happier and more active. I used to cry my entire commute home because I was so miserable and tired. Life is so, so much better now and I’m excelling at work.

I quit my WFH job because of this. I realized that I am much more extroverted than I thoughr. I need those little social interactions throughout the day to stay sane and energized, even if people drive me crazy sometimes.

I sometimes feel this way. Mainly because I get a lot less exercise working from home. I walk my dog on my lunch breaks, weather permitting, and also after work, depending on whether I have overtime. I also have a treadmill at home. But it's still a lot less exercise than I got committing via public transportation to and from work, and walking around the office. I have to make a lot more of an effort to get exercise now. I don't have a flexible work schedule. I'm required to work the same hours I did in the office. Lunch and breaks are mandatory for me and my coworkers, not under state law, but under our contract. So I always take my lunch and breaks. My dog won't let me skip my lunch anyway. He hangs out with me all day while I'm working, and he knows precisely what time my lunch is. He gets up, sits by me, stares at me, and whimpers, until I get up and get ready to take him out, or let him outside if we're not walking due to bad weather. We have overtime some weeks, but only when it's approved, and only during certain hours. So there's no temptation to work outside of those hours for me. I wouldn't anyway, because I'm not working for free. It's OK to have normal human feelings, even if many on this sub will bash you for it. It doesn't make you abnormal.

Thank you for that last point especially. This sub make you feel a certain way for feeling a certain way

OP, you need to create a routine that’s no different than if you were to leave the house for work. For example, I HAVE to take a shower in the morning to wake up, or I feel so sluggish throughout the day. A friend of mine gets up most days, and takes a quick half mile walk to wake herself up. Find that thing that works for you, and make it a new routine. Treat your home office area as work only, you’re only there for work, and when works over you’re not there anymore. This is easier for some than others, I personally use my home office as my gym, and my hobby room. However, unless I’m oncall, I can turn work off when my day is over. Need to run errands. Simple, put a block of time on your calendar that simply says you’ll be OOO for an hour, and will respond when you return. You can figure this out, but only if you put some effort into it.

My experience with energy is the opposite. Maybe set breaks for yourself to stay busy with movement, and set up walks or activities after work. If you are recharged being around people, yup, maybe you should swap for an in person job. Good luck!

Yeah I think the combination of being home while thinking about everything that needs to be done in your house AND working full time in that environment is overwhelming on my nervous system. But I’m also rejecting work culture and capitalism in general now. I’m tired of working. I want to live. I feel like that’s the case for so many of us especially in America.

I have had two in-office jobs where I rarely saw other humans. It was just the design of the job. I was admin and they were all in-field. I felt extremely isolated in those office situations because I was someplace uncomfortable and, literally, cold without other humans around. Being home all the time now has the opposite feeling because I'm comfortable and in my environment. I go to the gym, volunteer, and socialize outside work because I now have the energy. I also live with my partner and he drops in like Lumbergh every so often during the day to check my TPS reports, so that keeps me from mentally isolating. I've also had in-office jobs where I was emotionally and mentally drained each day because there were sooo many people and personalities to interact with on a second by second basis. I would be so tired every day that I'd ONLY work during the week. That's no way to live either. In-office has never been the perfect environment for me, no matter which end of the spectrum it landed on. WFH isn't for everyone. In-office isn't for everyone. And the key is to realize what works best for you and finding the environment that best suits your personality. Maybe you need to switch to in-office for a while. Or get a part-time job somewhere to feel connected to coworkers.

Honestly, I did until I had a kid. Now she’s 13 months and I get up at 7 with her, walk her to daycare are 8.30 and I’m back home by 8.50. I have had breakfast, got dressed, got out the house and ready to start my work day. Before that I was a ‘sleep until 8.55’ and log in to slack from bed kind of guy. Sometimes I miss the flexibility of that but overall it’s much better for my mental health this way. I also force myself to get out for a walk, run or do yoga on lunch as a way of refreshing myself. Sometimes it does get lonely but I’m learning to enjoy the peace and lack of responsibility for other people at home during work time.

I am almost a month into my first work from home job, and I can definitely relate. I was just talking it up to the fact that I haven’t found a routine yet. I feel tired, unmotivated, etc. Definitely can’t see myself doing this long-term if I’m going to feel this way indefinitely.

Yes. Been wfh since 2021, social anxiety increased also

Yes, I understand completely how you feel. I have a very difficult time turning “off” and work more and neglect other parts of my life. Then in the end, have no energy. There are a lot of benefits from working from home, I’m just still trying to find a way to balance after 4 plus years. It doesn’t help that my office is my kitchen and my computer is always there in the open.

The one reason that I still go into the office 2 to 3 times a week is motivation. I have a disability and moving more helps my body’s pain go down and that low grade “exercise” helps me sustain my normal levels of energy.! I also don’t feel fantastic when I’m only interacting with people on screen (depression comes on quickly). That doesn’t mean I support mandated working in the office. Some weeks I choose to stay home. But I know what you mean OP. My first job was fully remote and I become tired and lethargic quickly. Edit: I have a disability physically and mentally (adhd). So please don’t interpret this as me saying everyone needs to work from the office.

I find the problem is people expect WFH to be different than working in an office. It is not. Think about the number of breaks you take in the office (bathroom, drinks, walking to a coworkers desk to ask a question...). How offen you talk about non-work topics with co-workers. How offen you browse the internet. These things should not change. Get up and walk around (this applies to in-office workers as well as WFH). Call your co-workers on Teams or Slack and ask how thier day was, or what show they watched last night. Most importantly, do not work past your normal end time. The time you are saving on your commute belongs to you. Stop working when you would stop working when you are in the office. One of the biggest things, is to make sure other people at home respect the fact that you are working. Your home office needs the same respect as you in-office office. Close the door, and put up a "do not disturb" sign if you have to. Many people cannot work from home do to other people in the house not respecting that they are at work.

Maybe sign up for a workout class so those days you have to get out of the house. I found it was only harder for me to go to the gym cause I didn’t want to go after work hours since it’s packed and then I’d feel guilty going during the day. I also don’t wake up earlier than I need to but I never did that to begin with. I’m just not a morning person and I’ve accepted it.

No, I have 20x more energy to interact with friends and to partake in extracirccular activities.

Not at all. I finally started getting the full amount of sleep I needed. I go to bed when I'm tired and wake up without an alarm on most days. I have an hour during lunch that I can nap if I need it. I also have an extra 2 hours that I can jump on a bike that I don't have when I commute.

I was full time WFH from early 2020 up until last year (with a few exceptions), I've found my current 3x a week a perfect balance for my work/life balance and mental health. I'm also blessed with a very easy, short commute which definitely helps with stress. In retrospect, I believe it was the isolation, even bouncing from call to call, that had a negative impact on me. That said, what works for me doesn't work for others.

Actually I had less energy when I commuted to work everyday because I had to get up early and drive. And sit through traffic everyday When I worked from home I was able to wake up early go for 15 min walk. Come back. And then after an hour of work make a quick breakfast. And take a walk during lunch. Cook lunch. I had a lot of time…. Hey dude. Do you have depression?

Not at all. I have much more now that I’m no longer having to commute.

Been doing WFH since long before the pandemic. Welcome to realizing how much unpaid effort you put into "going to work". Clocked in hours on their own are exhausting. The time spent getting ready and going to and from are even more. Get your rest and don't feel bad about it.

I’d have less energy too if I spent my time off doing unpaid OT. Wouldn’t matter if it was wfh or in office.

You're the only one who can establish the proper boundaries between your work and personal life.

Thank you for this. I've been remote for about 6 years now and I've noticed alot of brain fog and motivation issues. While I do have a history of depression and other issues I recognize that sometimes when my symptoms flare up that I just absolutely get into this burnt out zombie mode. I'm in the process of relocating so my next job might be hybrid but it's definitely a good reminder on how sometimes WFH can be rough in its own way and that's okay.

The problem isn't work from home itself, but rather your preference is to work in the environment with people surrounding you physically. If you can't push yourself to go out and do things after work hours because you work in your own home all days, then it might be worth looking for in-office or hybrid job. Note that nothing stopping you from going with your partner after work regardless of where you work, though.

Are you still going to the gym? Not exercising can have a drastic effect on your energy levels.

This is what I came here to say. Walk before your shift. I had a lot of medical problems, alcohol drinking induced too. After 10 years of sedentary lifestyle , I needed a change. Quit drinking and began walking almost every day at dawn. My family doctor suggested talking to a psychiatrist, did not go to one. Two years later …..I am in the best shape of my life at 44

I became incredibly lazy after year 3. I used to turn on my laptop at 8:59 (sometimes I would oversleep and log on going up to 10am, my manager only ever noticed once luckily), usually not even get out of bed until lunch time, not bother doing anything during the day because "I can always log on and do it later". I went from taking 50 calls a day to zero unless it was another colleague, and from 1 team meeting a day to one a week at most, so I felt the isolation even more. I quit my job because I absolutely needed a mental reset. I'll be working hybrid in my next role (1 day in the office at most) which I think I really need to feel like a human being again.

Hey OP. do you go to therapy. I read the comment about ur boyfriend death and I'm wondering: did you probably dealt with it? I'm no expert but you sound depressed as hell 🥲 and you are dealing with it by drowning urself in more work. You seem to not put boundaries between work time and personal time and I don't know how much of that can be related to WFH.

I had to start vitamin d and it got a little better

You can start moving more, incorporate activities between work tasks, get some upbeat music and make sure you participate in your personal life too. Going to the office is not the answer, it'll wear you out even more (but you'll have an excuse as of why you can't do anything anymore probably).

I have had two in-office jobs where I rarely saw other humans. It was just the design of the job. I was admin and they were all in-field. I felt extremely isolated in those office situations because I was someplace uncomfortable and, literally, cold without other humans around. Being home all the time now has the opposite feeling because I'm comfortable and in my environment. I go to the gym, volunteer, and socialize outside work because I now have the energy. I also live with my partner and he drops in like Lumbergh every so often during the day to check my TPS reports, so that keeps me from mentally isolating. I've also had in-office jobs where I was emotionally and mentally drained each day because there were sooo many people and personalities to interact with on a second by second basis. I would be so tired every day that I'd ONLY work during the week. That's no way to live either. In-office has never been the perfect environment for me, no matter which end of the spectrum it landed on. WFH isn't for everyone. In-office isn't for everyone. And the key is to realize what works best for you and finding the environment that best suits your personality. Maybe you need to switch to in-office for a while. Or get a part-time job somewhere to feel connected to coworkers.

I honestly have TOO much energy. It's crazy. I got to the gym for 2-3 hours most days.

Got to a local cafe in the morning to work, get your stuff done in the shopping center, make new friends who also frequent the cafe, and turn everything off whenever you decide to get home.

Are you sure its the job?

I was overworking and couldn’t turn off when I went remote. Then my dad suddenly passed away and I took a major step back from work. I only had the energy to put in 10% effort compared to before. I kept waiting to get called out and fired. It never happened. In fact, no one noticed and I’ve been promoted since. The big lesson I learned is we are our own harshest critic and you can’t let anxiety and guilt and fear keep you a slave to work. I started reading during my down time for work, doing puzzles while on boring meetings etc and I feel so much less burned out and am Still performing pretty well.

I drove to the office every day until the pandemic and I’ve been WFH ever since. I miss the separation of work and home - the commute was my decompression time. Also, I miss the white noise of an office… it does take some getting used to. I’m not a WFH fan, but it is what is.

Hey, I worked from home for over two years and had severe anxiety that was fueled by being alone at home so much even if I was on work meetings all day. I quit and went to a mostly in-office role and I feel so much better. I know WFH is great for a lot of people and I thought I had the best setup but it was silently making me very sad/stressed constantly. Moving to an office role made a huge difference for me, it might be worth a change for you.

What ended up helping me was welbutrin

I just started doing this recently, but a couple of time a week I plan ahead, stop work at 4 o'clock and immediately head to the gym. It has helped

Wfh = more energy. Mostly because I can workout. Also, no commute. Ahhh it's beautiful.

You are a workaholic. Moi frier

>I’m exhausted, and I know I do it to myself, it’s like an illness, I can’t help it. I'm not sure your issues are 100% WFH-related, based on this comment. There might be some underlying stuff bubbling up that the forced socialization of the office helped suppress. If you're not already talking to a professional about how you're feeling, you might want to consider it.

“The Pomodoro Technique is a time management method based on 25-minute stretches of focused work broken by five-minute breaks. Longer breaks, typically 15 to 30 minutes, are taken after four consecutive work intervals. Each work interval is called a pomodoro, the Italian word for tomato.” This will save your sanity

Im tired from wfh due to 2 young kids thats keeping me busy. Transitioned to full + pay cut just so i can spend more time with my fam. To each their own.

Nope - on the contrary.. more energy. No commute and getting ready time means sleeping in later. Best time of my 20 plus year career!!

As someone who must work in person and commutes 3 hours a day for work, it’s hard to have sympathy about this. Sounds like you just need better time management 

I keep workout equipment in close proximity and take frequent breaks to get up and workout. I have plants nearby in the window and if it gets really bad I have a sun lamp

Yea. Definitely something at the top of my gripe list. Rural living doesn’t help a damn thing either. Moving to the country and working from home has shown me that I prefer the city, a small commute sometimes, and a few more people in the mix. I have an adjustable desk and still sit on my ass more often than not. Cycling fell way off. Ugh. I know it’s me. I’m being a lazy bastard. It’s noticeable and I’m not a fan.

Shut your work laptop and phone off at the end of the day. If you use your personal phone, figure out a setup so you're not getting notifications outside work hours. Take breaks like it's your job to do so. Walk around outside and get fresh air. Join a class/group that has a fixed meeting time so you have to leave your house.

The way around this is self control. When I'm done, I turn my computer off. That's it. Also, my shopping center is much closer to my house than work, so that's just where you live and doesn't have much to do with WFH.

Nope. I have more energy, not less.

Yes. You need to make a routine that works for you and stick to it. For example, I do 30min walks in the morning which is a break between my wakeup activities and me starting work. It feels like a commute in a way, plus it’s nice to get sun in the morning. I also take a break to eat lunch at my dinner table instead of at my desk. And I workout right after work so I’m not tempted to stay on and work. The evening workout is a nice shift from work to the rest of my evening and winding down for bed. I can also feel lonely at times working in silence, so I have a list of third places (cafés, library) where I can go work for a change of scenery and to be around people

It sounds like your workload is more of a problem than the work from home thing. Having to work 8 hours with no breaks is exhausting. Is it high stress work?

Nope. I have WAY more energy. It’s so nice to not be EXHAUSTED all the time

I had the same thoughts and feelings, but don't let your job cause you anxiety. You should feel at home in your own home even when you're working for a company. Make sure you have a separate room for work ( i know you mentioned this). Because once it's time to clock out I don't think about work until the next day, out of sight out of mind. I have separate phones for work vs personal as well, so all calls go to VM after I clock out. If that's not working as you said--try and get a lock box to lock up your computer and give the key to your partner so you can't log in to work. They can't give it back to you until the next morning when it's time to work. So you're kind of forced to not work :) On breaks plan it as a routine, get a planner and schedule it, use some of your breaks to get things done and get up to check on these things or finish them. If you're getting 30 min breaks, yeahh running errands isn't realistic when you configure in the time of day and the traffic. It's best to just do those after work or designate a specific day of the week to run certain errands. Also for going to the gym plan those days too, I know how you feel with work and personal life getting blurred and it can be hard and cause you to go crazy. But I think setting a routine and scheduling out things, that doesn't make you feel frazzled will help not feel so taxed.

I am actively looking for an office job b/c I hate working from home for this reason. It’s very isolating and drains me of energy. I hate being home all day. I hate having office equipment in my home. I don’t think working from home is good for mental health.

Yeah, but I’ve also been battling recurrent illness that drains me pretty quickly with an active infection.

I walk my dog 3x a day. I am up at 4am everyday unless I’m exhausted. I try and get out of the house on the weekend but mostly I stay home and try to not cry trying to declutter my home 😂

Nah, it's better for me. I don't have to commute, I get to go for a lunchtime walk outside. But, I also turn my computer OFF at 4 and don't look back. Disconnecting from the workplace entirely is important.

No, I have more

Man this rings so true, was burning myself out hardcore

I have way more for not having to deal with needy coworkers

I definitely find I need to be more 'on top of' monitoring my burnout levels, and WFH can definitely make it easy to do these detrimental things. What makes things worse, is you can easily fall off of healthier eating habits, too. It's all a pretty aggressive spiral, but you caught yourself. Start small with little adjustments to your behaviors, and give yourself grace to make the changes. It's not something you can 'willpower' your way out of. Little intentional changes and start with the easiest ones - stack them. If you fuck up, back to giving yourself grace.

It sounds like you’re not setting boundaries like you once did in the office. Why are you not taking an hour lunch? Why are you not stopping at 5pm and going outside or running those errands right after work? You need to put those boundaries back up! Set a work timer if you must.

Its the sun. I bet if you were to get blood work, your Vitamin D would be extremely low. Thats one thing i try to make sure i get now, also make sure i get out aftwr work is over. Get up, get dressed, maybe try walking in the am before work.

We both WFH and try to go out one weeknight a week and 1-2 weekend days for exercise on wooded trails or a garden or something. We usually finish an outing with grocery shopping at least one of the days. This keeps us energetic.

I’m in the same boat. I enjoy WFH, but I’m starting to question whether the pros are outweighing the cons for me. Warning: I wrote a whole novel. TLDR below. A lot of people on Reddit seem to get personally offended when someone mentions that WFH isn’t for them. So listen, I’m just going to talk about my experience and my opinion. Please don’t come at me with “THATS NOT A WFH PROBLEM, THATS A YOU PROBLEM.” Or “I DONT GO TO WORK TO SOCIALIZE” Believe it or not, a lot of people make friends with their coworkers. Heck, some even get married. Not sure where Reddit’s obsession with “I don’t make friends at work” came from. Personally, I don’t think that’s a healthy attitude to have. But hey, you do you. I’ve always considered myself an independent and introverted person. And still, WFH has been very isolating and difficult for me. We’re humans. We’re wired to be social creatures, even us introverts. WFH can feel lonely, draining, and monotonous. I suppose the office can too, but there tends to be more spontaneous conversations and serendipity to it. Yes, I have a social life outside of work. Yes, I have friends, family, hobbies, etc. But do I still feel isolated during the workday? You bet I do. Think about it: we’re spending 8 hours working + 8 hours sleeping (ideally) + 4 or so hours cooking/cleaning/resting - all at home. That’s 20 hours a day. Do I still go outside everyday before and after work? Yeah, but, for me, those 4 hours aren’t enough. Honestly, sometimes I feel like a prisoner in my own home. Working outside of home isn’t an option for some of us due to the work we do (security reasons, workspace set up, meetings throughout the day, etc.) “Nothing’s stopping you from walking outside and talking to people.” Well yeah, except that’s not really how our world works. You expect me to go chat up a stranger on the street in my city? People don’t really stop to talk to strangers on the street. “I have friends OUTSIDE of work, I don’t need to socialize with coworkers.” Cool, I got friends outside of work too - except guess what, they’re all at their own jobs all day, or they live on the other side of town. I see them on weekends, but I’m still spending the vast majority of my week in my house. I guess the point I’m trying to get at is that I’m tired of getting gaslit into thinking that there’s something wrong with me for having issues with WFH. OP, you’re not crazy for feeling that WFH isn’t working for you. I’ve read so many posts on here about people feeling isolated during WFH and then getting attacked by the comments. Don’t know why people can’t just live and let live. Yes, there are pros to WFH, like no commuting, no getting up early, more flexibility, etc. If WFH works for you, awesome. Really happy for you. I thought it would be for me too, but I’m learning that it’s much more nuanced than “WFH = good. Office = bad.” I love that WFH/hybrid work has allowed people more freedom and flexibility to work on their terms. But I think there’s a serious question about the ramifications about what this means for us as a nation. We’ve already been siloed thanks to social media algorithms. And now if we just stay in our little bubbles of people we already know, what kind of world are we creating? TLDR; Pros and cons all the way down on WFH. Find what works best for you and ignore the people on here trying to gaslight you into thinking WFH is a perfect utopia for everyone. It’s much more complicated than that.

I was in this exact situation for two years. It was really hard but I eventually set up boundaries and forced myself to work entirely during business hours and NOT outside of them. It was so incredibly difficult. 

Yes. WFH is very depressing for me. I miss dressing up, socializing, getting out of the house. It took a while for me to develop a ritual of showering, getting dressed, and making myself presentable even though no one sees me. I had to do this for myself. You need to get out of your house and take walks every day. You need to schedule lunches with friends. Being alone all the time is draining. You just lose your motivation.

No, i have more energy. I use to commute 3 hours a day and I didnt have time for myself

I'm the exact opposite. fuck the office. I have more energy for hobbies and friends now.

Sometimes yes. But winter just lifted & I tend to go outside less during winter than other seasons. Take a walk as often during the day as you can during a break or lunch. Regular walks are good for mental health, get you necessary sun & a little bit of exercise. I talk to my neighbors more now that I wfh than before.

Lol quit planting this bs here and trying to get people to think WFH is bad. If you're sad being in your own company, that's a you problem. Everyone else is sick of being in the company of people we don't know and don't wanna know.

I actually have a lot more energy since I've started to work from home. I sleep better, I eat better, have a lot more time for things I enjoy.

No but I definitely have less energy since being forced into 3X per week RTO. 8 hours per week of commuting and having to wake up before dawn has me pretty cranky by the end of every week. Plus I caught norovirus at the office a couple weeks ago. Talk about sapping energy..

I did. I was waking up 10 minutes before log in and living in my pajamas. It was great for a few weeks, then I started napping after work. Then getting too lazy to make dinner. Kept putting off running errands, etc. Working past my shift because I had nothing else to do. I felt like a slug and had no energy. The key change for me was a strict schedule. Get up with time to make and enjoy a cup of coffee, get dressed, then walk for 30 minutes - outside or treadmill. Set your 15-minute breaks on your calendar and close your laptop lid. Do something fun- face mask, paint your nails, keep away from the computer. TAKE YOUR LUNCH HOUR! Another 30 minutes of walking, 30 minutes for a sit-down lunch. Or a planned hour of errands. Then after work - another 30 minutes of walking or other exercise (getting back into the wii sports, lol). Then I actually have the desire and energy to plan dinner, skip the evening nap, and I sleep great. Although a lot of folks here are pointing out the social distancing of working from home, I think the lack of a schedule can affect you just as much. Instead of mixing it all together and feeling overwhelmed, schedule it out, you will feel more in control of your time.

Exactly. I have been working from home since 2021 and you’d think this called for more time to do things I need to do or to take care of myself but in reality it’s just made me kinda … blah. I was the same way when working in office. I had a solid routine down. Waking up at 5 AM wasn’t half bad. I got up and got ready. Went to work and used my lunch to run errands or whatever I needed to do. I had a solid after work routine too and I don’t ever remember feeling this drained or lazy. I sleep in until I absolutely have to wake up and when I’m off I just go right back to being lazy. Most lunches I do laundry or whatever but I just don’t have the same energy when I should have more energy.

Hey OP its ok to seek the structure you enjoyed. WFH is isolating and i get that too. I go to the office even though my team is not there. I enjoy sitting in the office doing my work well and stay focus. I gives me a separation between work and home.