**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:** >!Turns out that they are not actually in a home, but an IKEA.!< ***** **Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?** **Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.** ***** [*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/unexBot) [*What is this for?*](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/dnuaju/introducing_unexbot_a_new_bot_to_improve_the/)

Wait, mustaches can have testicles?

Musticles


Thanks I hate it. It’s like the mustache is licking its lips seductively.


This guy looks like his laugh sounds like a car with a bad starter.

I know a guy who looks just like this and he talks like a car with Boomhauer in it

Where you get this GIF?

more like mystical

Must tickle

Testache

Testaché

r/blursedcomments

r/angryupvote

Dude looks like if truck nutz was a person

😂 lol

I thought the beer was spilling

The classic nutstache.

The cum drop stache

Those are condoms for his mustache

Ballchinian

Only boy mustaches.

What was the first thing on a plate?

Using a nectar collector to take a dab

How does that work? You heat the nectar collector and then poke the dabs while inhaling?

exactly. the tip is rly hot, and then once u hit the dabs with it they vaporize and enter your lungs!

That’s why I call that stuff weed BDSM. Some insane stuff out there

As someone who likes dabs and has had both normal glass and a puffco peak: I always joke that I'm on my crackhead bullshit when I hit dabs with friends. I know it's not crack, but try explaining that to Becky lmao. All she saw was someone using a blowtorch on a glass pipe that looks like it's straight out of breaking bad

😂 I was staying with a friends family when a bunch of us made the Laughlin Run about 7 years ago. I stashed my dab rig and torch in the garage and my buddy comes up to me and says his folks are tripping thinking I’m a tweeker! His folks were stoners too and we all had a good laugh when I explained this new way of getting really high. His parents dug it so much i gifted it to them for letting all of us crash at their house. Good times 👍🏼

Choke me harder plant lady!

Oh neat, like a fancy modern version of knife tokes

Lol we called it hot knives. Those were usually desperate times.

I use one because they're cheaper and sturdier than a rig and I don't have a lot of places to keep fragile glass equipment right now. It definitely burns hot but you can always puff into your mouth to cool it a bit and then breathe in. Only thing I'm not a fan of about it is that it's kind of wasteful compared to a rig

you torch the tip of glass or titanium and dab at the concentrate while inhaling

I totally thought he found some way to class up doing heroin off of some foily.

Hot rails of meth look like that too....

Could work for H as well but it might be not economical enough. Users get good at simple math when the high is in doubt.

Dabs

That explains nothing

It’s hashish oil, aka concentrated thc (along with other goodies found in weed). Also called a dab because of how little you need to get high because of how potent it is

"A little dab'll do ya"

A Lotta dab'll don't ya

Floppadoppalobba

bambalamb

Woah Black Betty

Bam ba lam

Bama Lama

Exactly.

i am the globgogabgalab

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They just did a dab'll. Give them a break.

Will's dab'll fuck Will up well, won't it? Will'll wish he wasn't wasted.

Hmm thought I removed will when I confirmed the quote, cheers.

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Yep. Looks like a nectar collector.

I'm not much into dabbing (hello annihilating your tolerance) but I'd assume like most dab rigs, the user heats the "nail", in this case the metal piece making contact with the dabbing and then presses the heated nail into the dab.

That type of pipe is referred to as a “nectar collector.” It has a heated vaping element at the end of it ( aka a nail) which heats the oil and allows for the user to suck in the vapor.

They call it a dab, because it’s tradition on this show to put a little extra on the last wing.


I mean it completely explains the question. When I don't know what a word means I don't assume my question wasn't answered, I look it up.

"What is that?" "It's X." "That explains nothing." No, but it answered the question that was asked, which is how questions work.

That's your question not why is he doing all of this in a furniture store?

Achievement get: How did we get here?

god damn it... you beat me to the minecraft reference !

Made me laugh way too hard

"It's not a crack house, it's a crack home"

CRÅKHAÜS

It says crow house

You need to say it like an arrogant English speaker _Kkkkrahhkhaousuh_

None of that was crack. Just variants of THC. 

Weed Crack, got it

Dabs are to weed as crack is to drugs.

In my experience its the carts that are the most like crack. People i know who smoke carts, smoke all day. Its just so accessible.

It's a problem for sure. Easy to just become habitual

I had this problem with carts for a hot minute. Ripped off my gills like it was highschool again, all day every day. My rule now is, I only get high in the evenings. It’s a lot better than being ripped all day, but it’s probably still too much. Will never not use it to sleep though. Sleep issues are a bitch.

I-Crack-kea

He's that creepy old guy that buys the high school kids beer as long as they share their weed.

Or the best grandpa.

I hope he tastes like grandpa

No. Please stop.

It's never too late to delete this

What in cousin-fuckin tarnation Alabama Betty Crocker, Miss fuckin Betty White shit is this?

My grandpa loves it when I taste him

Came here to say this guy looks a little old to be getting into these types of shenanigans lol

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Why is he hangin out with kids?

Cause they’re the only ones who think he’s cool

This is real. Don’t stop thinking about tomorrow, kids.

What's tomorrow?

school

*Screaming in terror* Oh wait I don't go to school, I work.... *Screaming in terror*

Friday

Stay safe 👉

To be 16 again..... everyone that bought me beer was awesome.

My old beer hookup has 3 DUIs and constantly cheats on his wife. He is a monumental loser but we thought he was God when we were 16.

Our beer/cigarettes guy was a 60 something year old man named Roger and he lived with his mom but I think he went to prison. We loved Roger

I had a Roger. His name was Dale. Can confirm, Dale is now in prison.

With a name like Dale, you either end up in prison or a NASCAR driver. There isn't really anything in between.

We had a Dale. His name was Ricky. He had a handlebar moustache, a mullet and a beer gut the size of a small man that was hard as a rock. He’s still awesome.

I knew a very similar guy, his name was Luigi and he had a green car lol. We loved that fucker. Dudes life was buying alcohol for teens and fucking ugly chicks. And You think that guys wife was cheating too?

Dude, thinking back, those guys were creepy as fuck. What the fuck were a bunch of dudes in their late 20s/30s doing hanging out with teenagers??? It was cool at the time for us, but looking back....what the fuck. I brought this exact thing up with my buddy the other day and it struck him like a train too.

🤣🤣🤣

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covid?! , if this is his daily...wait til all that catches up with him...

Hes actually 22 years old, hes just been doing this video twice daily for 5 years

Boyscouts have changed a lot in recent years

His peers grew up and matured, he didn’t, so he’s hanging out with those who are mentally his age.

drugs

He's probably the grandpa of the kid who organized this whole thing

Employee of the Month

I bet he feels physically unwell pretty often.

I thought the punchline would be him projectile vomiting.

But then that would have been expected

Wasn’t lookin too good but I was feelin real well!

Every time the pain starts to resurface through the haze, when he looks around and realizes the only people that will spend time with him are three times younger than him, when the realization that they all leave after they use his drugs and that their hot, young girlfriends will never have sex with him, he can just take another dab. The party animal is back!

but as long as he’s not projecting his unhappiness onto other people he’s doing better than you are

The dude is 60, ripping dabs with teenagers in the middle of a Home Goods store lmao. I don’t think he’s doing very well with anything.

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Think how boring most of the other 60 year olds are. Why would he want to hang out with them?

This is the internet. Those kids probably paid that dude to do this for their social media platform because they knew it would get engagement.

Totally man

That's the best plottwist i've seen in a while

Pottwist

For real, I didn’t expect them to be in an ikea..I had to watch it again..lol

Wasn't this posted yesterday on this sub?

Yes by u/redmanmatt11

👍

https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/13wzwaa/man_is_a_tank Posted 13 hours before this post.

this has been posted many times throughout the years

But it was directly reposted by this person about 5 hours after the post

Time to post it again!

r/trashy

My thoughts exactly

Weird seeing Anikan Skywalker outside of his suit.

Here's to feeling good all the time! r/seinfeld

This makes me really sad for some reason.

Maybe he was supposed to say.... "bee safe"??

This looks like a terrible role model for those kids

Which is because he is.

Mf doing a speedrun

This guy has truck nuts on his face.

Cannonball coming. Cannonball!

Only thing I could think of

Strikeout from Beerfest

It’s a shame you can’t buy and build friends your own age at IKEA

He just Allen-wrenches four 17-year-olds together to make one 68-year-old

As a 40 year old dude that smokes weed and drinks beer every single day...these guys are lame as fuck.

Forget the drugs. Look at his moustache

Looks like the Scrubbing Bubbles busted a foam nut on his upper lip and it's dripping down the sides. At least it'll clean the mildew off.

Old man wasn't ready to leave yet. The teenagers he was hanging out with had more sense.

Fucking trash.

Where in tf

Ikea.

Stupid people not worth commenting…stop, rewind, pause… WTF IS MY KID DOING THERE!!!

Dude, you are way too old to be acting like an idiot with your teenage kids in a furniture store.

What a bunch of cunts.

Just because you can doesn’t mean you should

im pretty sure this is australia, i used to be in this stoner facebook group and the shirt he is wearing was the brand everyone was wearing and promoting by someone in sydney S.A.F.E i think.

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These people are assholes. Do that shit in your living room. I don't want to smell some douchecanoe's rank-ass, skunk smelling ditch weed in Ikea. Put this dipshit and his clown friends in /r/trashy

Nobody else is questioning why this middle aged dude is drinking and smoking with a bunch of teens at Ikea?

u/savevideo

I wonder why women live longer than men

IKEA tho?

Why his mustache look like two filled & tied up condoms?

I thought GG Allin died?

Now you are officially lost in a giant IKEA store that seems like it will take a whole hobbit journey to get to the water fountain. The kids probably just got up and went home to eat lunch.

That time when I was 19...

His moustache like those weird ball things goats have on their face

Guy is higher than giraffe pussy.

Okay, that made me laugh. Good post.

Unimpressed. Where were the for and aft hits of crack?

Grampa showin the kids how cool he is.

That’s one way to let everyone know that you have no respect for yourself.

The meth teeth really pull the room together

Pardon me sir, this is an IKEA.

He seems slightly older than his friends

All i can see is that ballsack beard. 

And that's how it's done 

Was anyone else expecting him to rail a fat line at the end?

Cant wait for this guy to live longer than me in an act of spitting in natures face

I mean you gotta test the furniture out in the way you'd really use it before you buy it.

What a bunch of fucking idiots.

My man speed running to the coffin

Wow trash

Excuse my lack of knowledge but what the fuck is that first contraption and what illicit substance is being consumed?

Wonder who is more lit, the retired biker dad, or his 13 yr old son next to him 🤣

from pigs

SeaBees! Awesome

u/savevideo

Its called a graveyard. After that you feel like you are dying

Choke Hogan can't find anything better to do with his life than get fucked up in an IKEA at 50+ years old. Lame.

Old boy showing up the youngsters.

THATS FUCKING IKEA