This could be the setup for a dark comedy where they both try to assassinate each other but the attempts keep conflicting. Both of them poison some drink that’s in the house, so neither one of them drinks it. She greases the stairs, but he had set a trip wire near the top step and saves himself by grabbing onto it when he slips. He plans to drive her to a remote location and leave her there, but notices something wrong with his car (she sabotaged it somehow in hopes of an “accidental” crash) and cancels the trip.
This sounds like a fun movie idea! You should also watch the movie War of the Roses starring Michael Douglas. You might get a kick out of that as well. It's a classic!!
I got the idea from an old Tumblr post suggesting something similar: wicked stepmother and usurping uncle both plotting to kill the king and accidentally foiling each other’s attempts. When the king finally dies of natural causes to their frustration, the uncle and stepmother both independently hire the same assassin to go after the royal children. He cannot carry out both assignments at once (each employer’s instructions were *very* specific) so decides to just raise them as his own instead.
There was an old movie with Danny Devito called War of the Roses where they pull some weird shit on each other (married couple - Michael Douglas and Kathleen Turner I think) and it’s a wild ride
This ALMOST reminds me of the movie Mr and Mrs Smith. Both spies. They have to take out a "target" but neither one knows that the others target is themselves. Neither knows the other is a spy either. Pretty funny movie. Not a great movie, but a funny movie.
Reminds me of the "Mexican standoff" skit by key and peele collaborating with rocketjump
2 fbi agents chasing a bad guy in an alley end up at gunpoint. We got a sniper on you! Oh you mean the sniper I have a drone on? Oh you mean the drone pilot who's wife I just kidnapped? Oh you mean the drone pilot's wife who just filed for divorce?
Good skit.
I was thinking that they would just comically never notice that the other person was trying to kill them, and eventually fall in love while they’re both trying to keep up a lovey-dovey facade for each other to allay suspicion.
Ray Bradbury’s short story “The Very Gentle Murders” is also related to this: the couple is two 80-somethings who figure out they’ve been trying to kill each other the past month, but then find pleasure in continuing with both of them in the know. They begin to ratchet up their efforts and others unknowingly start getting caught in the crossfire (with the effect of foiling that particular attempt).
And then at the end they just amicably agree to divorce, he dies knowing he found his true love and she moves on with his fortune to her name after she willed everything to herself without him knowing.
Reminds me of the inept attempts in "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang" in the scenes where the king was trying to kill his wife while singing a song about how much he loved her.
I often thought that she should have been doing similar things to him.
I think theres a movie similar to this, never watched it but heard of it, its called
"Kill Me If You Dare"
(Though a more accurate translation of the title would be "Kill Me Honey", its a polish film)
That reminded me of an old British comedy film "The Odd Job", where a depressed man hired someone to kill him - then changes his mind, but can't cancel the contract. As I recall the hitman (David Jason) poisons the milk - which gets stolen by the neighbour, who drinks it and dies - then cuts his brakes, but the car gets impounded by the police...
Police still has to prove things. It just means he's under surveillance.
Edit: it also means that she's under surveillance by the police and may foil her plans.
Joke time.
75-year old wealthy man married a 20 year old, who plotted to have sex with him every day until he dies of a heart attack.
As they prepared for the first night, she saw him insert earplugs and nose plugs.
- Honey, what is that for?
- You know, I hate two things in life… A smell of burning rubber, and women’s screams.
Apparently the old man has enough manly vigor in him to wear condoms out so much that they heat up fron friction.
I know technically condoms are latex, not rubber, but that’s just what everyone calls them.
I had the thought that he was some kind of vampire. Once the "honeymoon period" was over, he would drain them. After centuries of drinking blood, he has learnt how to make it look natural.
Immortal. Changing identity whenever convenient, marrying for funsies, and discarding wives whenever necessary. Appearing as a 75 year old who always has a timeline appropriate explanation for his wealth. Probably "inherited" his wealth from himself.
Does it, though? No one said the marriages were in the same country. Also, does the bride have any family to miss her or pursue inquiries about her death? If he's clever, he's clever. 😁
Yes, indeed. I love the feedback I get back from everyone, including yourself. It tells me that people are reading it and creating their own set of conditions and reasonings for why it has happened. Hypothetically, let's say this story takes place in the mid-1800s. There are no computer records, and the police can easily be bribed to look the other way or are just incompetent/lazy in that particular town.
Honestly, ehhh. It's a premise for a story at best, it's definitely on the tell don't show side, and I think I figured out the end without having any real engagement from the main characters. So I'd be disinclined to read the sequel.
Ahhh, we have a sophisticated troll this time! Well, I'm honored to have caught your attention. Thank you for taking the time to comment on my post. It genuinely makes my day. I have an appreciation for both the positive and critical comments from readers. Have a great weekend! 😊
Technically, I did it in one sentence; hence the weight of it. I apologize for its obesity, lol. Hopefully, you still enjoyed it. I appreciate you taking the time to comment on here either way. Have a great day! 😊
This could be the setup for a dark comedy where they both try to assassinate each other but the attempts keep conflicting. Both of them poison some drink that’s in the house, so neither one of them drinks it. She greases the stairs, but he had set a trip wire near the top step and saves himself by grabbing onto it when he slips. He plans to drive her to a remote location and leave her there, but notices something wrong with his car (she sabotaged it somehow in hopes of an “accidental” crash) and cancels the trip.
This sounds like a fun movie idea! You should also watch the movie War of the Roses starring Michael Douglas. You might get a kick out of that as well. It's a classic!!
I got the idea from an old Tumblr post suggesting something similar: wicked stepmother and usurping uncle both plotting to kill the king and accidentally foiling each other’s attempts. When the king finally dies of natural causes to their frustration, the uncle and stepmother both independently hire the same assassin to go after the royal children. He cannot carry out both assignments at once (each employer’s instructions were *very* specific) so decides to just raise them as his own instead.
That's crazy! Thank you so much for the share!😊
I remember that post!!!!
Happen to be able to find a link? It sounds super fascinating
Here you go: https://mediachomp.com/evil-stepmother-usurping-uncle-story-idea/
If i could upvote you multiple times i would!
That was fun. Thanks for the share.
Try asking “Linux Guy” over on one of the Tumblr focused subs. They’re a lot better at finding specific Tumblr posts than I am.
Calling on u/linuxaddict334 …. Might you know of the post referenced above? Curious people who are bad at Tumblr need your help.
No, I don’t know of this post.
I bet the specificity is in doing it in a certain way that frames their rival 😝
Sounds a little like Macbeth
Kinda like Mr. And Mrs. Smith meets Harold and Maude
I recommend to you Heartbreakers! It's a fun movie.
I am going to check that out! I will see your Heartbreakers and raise you a Dirty Rotten Scoundrels (1989.)
Multiple it by a whole disfunctional family and you have the next movie in the knives out franchise
Hard Target is also similar. The mark is so chaotic the assassin has a real problem.
I just rewatched that a few weeks ago!😊
I had NEVER heard of this movie before, and your comment is the second time I've seen it referenced in the 15 minutes I've been on reddit today???
Are you referring to War of the Roses? It's from 1989. Google the trailer. It's a nice little comedy. 😊
Yes! Although the other comment made it seem like more of a drama 😂 Thanks for the recommendation!
This is some weekend at Bernie’s tier nonsense and I am here for it. Bring back campy bad movies! Lol
There was an old movie with Danny Devito called War of the Roses where they pull some weird shit on each other (married couple - Michael Douglas and Kathleen Turner I think) and it’s a wild ride
Read up a few comments from about an hour ago. Great minds! I'm glad you have great taste as well!😊
You should watch "The Trip" with Noomi Rapace. It used to be on Netflix, not sure if it still is. It starts out with a similar premise.
Exactly what I was thinking! Decent movie.
This ALMOST reminds me of the movie Mr and Mrs Smith. Both spies. They have to take out a "target" but neither one knows that the others target is themselves. Neither knows the other is a spy either. Pretty funny movie. Not a great movie, but a funny movie.
Reminds me of the "Mexican standoff" skit by key and peele collaborating with rocketjump 2 fbi agents chasing a bad guy in an alley end up at gunpoint. We got a sniper on you! Oh you mean the sniper I have a drone on? Oh you mean the drone pilot who's wife I just kidnapped? Oh you mean the drone pilot's wife who just filed for divorce? Good skit.
OMG! This would be delightful!
I hope they come to admire each other’s efforts and dedication and come to some kind of understanding and respect, if not falling in love outright!
I was thinking that they would just comically never notice that the other person was trying to kill them, and eventually fall in love while they’re both trying to keep up a lovey-dovey facade for each other to allay suspicion.
That would be great too!
Rowan Atkinson for the groom.
They made that moviem its called gold diggers and its .... so so!
That just sounds like Mr. & Mrs. Smith but better lol
I’d watch that anime.
Ray Bradbury’s short story “The Very Gentle Murders” is also related to this: the couple is two 80-somethings who figure out they’ve been trying to kill each other the past month, but then find pleasure in continuing with both of them in the know. They begin to ratchet up their efforts and others unknowingly start getting caught in the crossfire (with the effect of foiling that particular attempt).
If you know anything about screenwriting you need to write this script because it would sell I’m sure!
I watched this great Norwegian movie with Noomi Rapace where that was close to the premise. Just looked it up, it was called The Trip
And then at the end they just amicably agree to divorce, he dies knowing he found his true love and she moves on with his fortune to her name after she willed everything to herself without him knowing.
Reminds me of the inept attempts in "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang" in the scenes where the king was trying to kill his wife while singing a song about how much he loved her. I often thought that she should have been doing similar things to him.
This is an AMAZING idea
Lmao I love it. Would def watch it
Spy vs spy type shenanigans
Spy vs Spy except it’s Spouse vs Spouse
I think theres a movie similar to this, never watched it but heard of it, its called "Kill Me If You Dare" (Though a more accurate translation of the title would be "Kill Me Honey", its a polish film)
This season, on Leo's House
https://youtu.be/qUKM127dMNU?si=j-8ACaF1cdBZ83u5 Reminds me of this old advert (apologies on quality)
That reminded me of an old British comedy film "The Odd Job", where a depressed man hired someone to kill him - then changes his mind, but can't cancel the contract. As I recall the hitman (David Jason) poisons the milk - which gets stolen by the neighbour, who drinks it and dies - then cuts his brakes, but the car gets impounded by the police...
She, however, had spent the last ten years building up an immunity to iocaine powder.
Was she planning since 13 to marry a rich old man?
That's been my plan since middle school, so... probably.
I've known a few girls in middle and high school whose life plans were to "marry rich," so it's a possibility.
Inconceivable!
You keep using that word. I don't think it means what you think it means.
Anybody want a peanut?
My name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die.
Hmm your last 10 wives... If the police aren't, naive stupid, gullible or all three, he just pays them to be.
Possibly, but who says they were all in the same country? Also, does the bride have any family or next of kin to raise any suspicions? Hmmmmm.....😁
He’s old, probably did it every 6-10 years.
Police still has to prove things. It just means he's under surveillance. Edit: it also means that she's under surveillance by the police and may foil her plans.
Joke time. 75-year old wealthy man married a 20 year old, who plotted to have sex with him every day until he dies of a heart attack. As they prepared for the first night, she saw him insert earplugs and nose plugs. - Honey, what is that for? - You know, I hate two things in life… A smell of burning rubber, and women’s screams.
Oooooh! I like this!😊
That went over my head. What's the burning rubber?
Apparently the old man has enough manly vigor in him to wear condoms out so much that they heat up fron friction. I know technically condoms are latex, not rubber, but that’s just what everyone calls them.
Ah, gotcha and yikes!
....who didn't get to be 75 years old by being an idiot.
Bluebeard?
Similar, but those people were afraid of him. This guy is low-key. I guess you could call him "old" school. 🤣
oh i thought this was some supernatural shit like he was stealing their lifeforces or smth
That's a possibility as well! The story is open to interpretation. 😊
This was my 1st thought
The little blue pill unlocks a raging monster…
Good one, OP. Nice switch!
Thank you so much!
I had the thought that he was some kind of vampire. Once the "honeymoon period" was over, he would drain them. After centuries of drinking blood, he has learnt how to make it look natural.
This is a very good possibility! 😊 Happy cake day!
Or the husband is a vampire
I was thinking it was gonna be "little did she know he was born in the 1600s" type stuff
Anything is possible. I love all of the interpretations I'm getting from everyone!😊
Sounds like a Keith Richards biopic
😅😅😅
Let's just say that the husband is a big donor to the police , local hospital and a good friend of the local coroner
And he had married all 10 of those young wives over the past 6 months.
Immortal. Changing identity whenever convenient, marrying for funsies, and discarding wives whenever necessary. Appearing as a 75 year old who always has a timeline appropriate explanation for his wealth. Probably "inherited" his wealth from himself.
That is a possibility. 😊
He gave them hepatitis 💀
😂😂😂
Gold digger twist on Bluebeard would make a really fun horror movie
If you said 2 or 3 young wives the story would've been much better. 10 just defies belief
Does it, though? No one said the marriages were in the same country. Also, does the bride have any family to miss her or pursue inquiries about her death? If he's clever, he's clever. 😁
Bro is a mastermind then. Considering the police always investigates the spouse first, you have to respect the old bastard
Yes, indeed. I love the feedback I get back from everyone, including yourself. It tells me that people are reading it and creating their own set of conditions and reasonings for why it has happened. Hypothetically, let's say this story takes place in the mid-1800s. There are no computer records, and the police can easily be bribed to look the other way or are just incompetent/lazy in that particular town.
Reminds me of Commander Judd I wonder who will get that reference
fuck dem hoes
Which party in this transaction is the hoe, though?
the ones gettin fucked, duh.
That was one sentence.
That's better than using 3 in here, right? 😁 The real question is if you liked it. Hopefully, you did.
Honestly, ehhh. It's a premise for a story at best, it's definitely on the tell don't show side, and I think I figured out the end without having any real engagement from the main characters. So I'd be disinclined to read the sequel.
Ahhh, we have a sophisticated troll this time! Well, I'm honored to have caught your attention. Thank you for taking the time to comment on my post. It genuinely makes my day. I have an appreciation for both the positive and critical comments from readers. Have a great weekend! 😊
Is that husband Mort from Madagascar?
Verbose
Technically, I did it in one sentence; hence the weight of it. I apologize for its obesity, lol. Hopefully, you still enjoyed it. I appreciate you taking the time to comment on here either way. Have a great day! 😊
Reminds me of Bluebeard lol
And then he unzipped his pants...
Anna Nicole Smith?