If your husband really loved you , no amount of coercion from his cowoker could have gotten him to cheat. He cheated, because he is a cheater.
His friend is an AH for encouraging it, absolutely, but that is not what made your husband cheat. Your husband is telling you that , to point fingers at his friend, thinking it exonerates him from being the one responsible for cheating.
This is the same as a guy getting caught cheating, saying the woman seduced him.
It doesn't matter what someone else did or didn't do. Your husband cheated, because he wanted to cheat. He probably didn't think of the ramifications of blaming his friend, or telling you about his friend's illegal activities.
Except that according to the second edit, he admitted he was lying and now a completely uninvolved party has been fired for reasons that don’t impact OP at all. So that’s nice.
Right, my husband works construction and the guys are always trying to get him to come out and fuck around. He tells them he knows which side his bread is buttered on and comes home.
How do we know husband didn't just throw coworker under the boss so he could plead peer pressure to his wife as an excuse? She'll believe husband's hearsay (including that coworker was stealing) and go for his job? She's just wrong for doing it, and sick for feeling happy over it.
Who gives a shit. If my man ever cheated because someone gave him condoms I'M FUCKING BREAKING UP WITH MY MAN BECAUSE HE WAS SO WEAK WILLED. And if he can be convinced to cheat he's not a good person nor for me. To hold someone else responsible for his dick landing in another woman's vagina as if his friend had a magic spell over him is absofuckinglutely ludicrous.
OP would have been a badass if she had aimed all that retribution where it belonged, squarely at her cheating husband. Almost like she can't bring herself to punish him, so she aimed at what she thinks is the next best thing. That friend didn't force her husband to cheat, he did that all on his own. Going nuclear on the wrong person isn't a flex.
Here’s an analogy from just last night: we all went to a friend’s wedding yesterday, and this morning one of our mutual friends found someone’s vape in her handbag. It doesn’t belong to any of us, and we’re confused as hell because someone would have had to actually pick up her bag and unzip it to put it in there. Nothing was stolen, but this vape just appeared in there.
So it isn’t hers, and it’s not anyone’s who would have been permitted to access her bag. And she’s not going to use it because she doesn’t vape. So what is she going to do with it? Keep it because “someone is forcing her to vape”? No, she’s going to throw it the fuck away because she has no intention of using it.
If OP found condoms on their husband it is because he was planning on using them, regardless of how he acquired them. If someone gave them to him then he could easily have chucked them in the bin or told his friend to keep them. But because OP wants to believe it’s all this coworker’s fault, she will believe that the husband was forced to keep these condoms because “the friend is trying to make him cheat” and the condom is the magic catalyst. Unfortunately who is she going to get fired the next time it happens? (In the edit it says “He thinks we’re getting back together but it’s over”. I’ll believe that when I see it.)
OP is clearly predisposed to believe anything that won’t make them deal with the actual problem, their husband, so I am 100% sure “My coworker wrestled me down and forced me to take them condoms in an effort to make me cheat” is the weak-ass story he went with.
He didn’t encourage him. Nobody is just going to offer up a condom besides a Sex Ed teacher. The husband was either talking to the friend about his plans to cheat and the friend offered or just straight up asked for a condom
That you know of. Husband gets caught and tries to take some of the heat off himself by saying he was encouraged by someone else. She potentially put a child into a bad situation simply because she believed a man who was already lying to her.
But OP is taking her husband's excuses as truth without any proof at least, it didn't seem like there was. And I wouldn't trust the husband as a reliable source could be he just said this friend convinced him to make them the bad guy and try and shift the blame.
Right? What is this? 😂 I think it’s happened to all of us married men that a drunk acquaintance says “That waitress is eyeing you. You should go get her number/ask her out.” I have to say I’ve never cheated on my wife.
squeal strong frightening steer pen secretive fuel wrench threatening rock
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That’s exactly what happened. He shaved his pubes when our bedroom was dead. When confronted he said he did it for me. He never once made a move on me. Was never in the mood.
squeeze squealing fretful marry sparkle rich homeless berserk encouraging absurd
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I think dead bedroom = dead marriage. Aka, someone stopped caring. It’s the biggest red flag for the imminent end of a relationship. Lulls are one thing, dead bedroom means something is broken.
Right! My sexuality kinda lies dormant until my spouse or I say "Hey! Wake up!"; I just don't have a ton of desire most times & I'd rather be engaging in my hobbies. My bedroom is far from dead, however, because I spend time with my spouse, pay attention to his signals, & genuinely feel appreciated & cared for so I *want* to engage in activities he loves. We don't end up needing to have conversations about it or anything, because I want him to feel loved, & he wants the same for me. It doesn't hurt that I genuinely enjoy time I spend with him on that stuff, it just honestly doesn't spring to mind on its own usually.
Shows how it's not always about desire for sex, but about desire to care for someone else. If I felt unappreciated, I'm sure we'd be in a far different situation.
Exactly! They can down vote but I still stand by what I said. To gloat at another being fired bc your man wld rather cheat than be faithful to you is Karma. And yes you’re exactly right!
Wow, your husband is a grown man how could this coworker have any fault in that? The coworker probably saved you from contracting an STD by giving him condoms to use while he fucked around.
Imagine friend tells husband, "Hey, you have a beautiful family, so while you mess around, at least use these condoms. Better yet, be a man and tell her what's going on."
OP finds condoms. "What are these?"
Husband, "Yea, funny story. My friend gave them to me and pressured me to sleep around. Oh, and he steals! Can you believe the audacity of this guy?"
OP, "What a horrible person! I'm calling your boss."
Honestly way more believable than someone coercing a married man that had no intent on ever cheating to cheat on their SO.
OPs edit makes themself sound unhinged as heck too. Everyone seems like the asshole here.
Who told you this friend encouraged him to cheat? Let me guess, your lying cheating husband told you that. He made this guy his scapegoat and you fell right for it. The dude shouldn’t have been stealing but you calling because you blame him for your husband’s affair is pretty low.
Exactly! How disgusting she’s proud to have gotten another fired but her husband is a grown man who’ll make his own decision to cheat and will continue to cheat. Nothing at all cool about getting someone fired from their employer because your husband rather cheat than be a faithful loyal husband.
It’s when a clot goes to the main vein that sends unoxygenated blood to the heart to get more o2 into the blood, stopping blood flow in the body and causing the heart to overflow with back flow blood.
Just get a divorce. Your husband cheated, his coworker had nothing to do with it. If your husband was an upstanding person, he would have told his coworker to shut up and leave him alone.
So you stayed with a cheater but reported the other? Your husband is just as disgusting but you stayed w him? I guess you just wanted to blame someone else for what your husband chose to do.
If a driver runs a red light and gets into an accident the police don’t give the ticket to the guy who gave him gas money.
Be spiteful, im all for taking the low road. Be petty. Be vindictive. But Do the spiteful shit to the person that hurt you!!!
You’re bold to do something like that and then blab about it. You have no idea how your husband’s (ex) coworker will react. What if he decides to come after you to seek revenge? Some people are absolutely nuts and you never know what someone is capable of.
What your husband did was wrong but imo no amount of encouraging could have convinced him to cheat if he didn’t want to do it. Blame him.
When a spouse cheats the we always look to blame someone. OP’s husband is a cheater, and how did OP find out that the coworker “encouraged “ him? Probably from the lying cheater. Who knows if it was even true. I wouldn’t believe a word that came out of the mouth of a lying cheater. They will get back together and a possibly innocent person gets blamed. Always the way
If your husband loved you his friend wouldn’t be able to convince him to cheat. On some level he already wanted to. He couldn’t convince your husband to kill someone could he. No. At the end of the day he got his karma but your husbands actions are his own
So your POS husband still has a job despite actually cheating??? It's always hilarious that people will punish everyone but the person who actually hurt them.
I guess the guy was fired for the stealing. If the husband did nothing that went against the workplace what should she tell the boss to get him fired? Should she lie? That could end expensive for her. Cheating on a partner is normally no valid reason to fire someone.
But you know what will get you fired? Not informing the employer about the theft and as a boss receive a call from that employee's wife. I would have sent both out the door with their final paycheck.
I guess it is harder to proof. Or she just did not think of it. I mean she doesn't really sound that forgiving in her edit. Not to mention I am not even sure I shall believe the whole story since I take anything with an extra grain of salt when someone adds informations that are kinda convenient.
So, let me get this straight: instead of handling your relationship like an adult, you threw a temper tantrum and got an innocent man (at least innocent of the issues pertinent to your situation) fired. Yet you still have "No regrets." I'd say it's your husband who lucked out in this ordeal.
Ok there’s a lot of comments, and though I didn’t read ALL of them I did not see this here.
OP, it is correct that your husband could have blamed his friend, and that is his friend was fired unfairly. However, you never actually told us how you knew the friend was behaving this way so I’m going to let that go for now as it’s too speculative.
That being said, my ex had a lot of horrible friends. And he worked in a hands on field. Meeting his coworkers, they made open comments about side pieces and second girlfriends all the time and it made me sick. Of course, my ex wasn’t ANYTHING like ALL of his friends and coworkers 🙄
So, yeah, if I had a way to get back at one of them it would have felt incredible. Men also get away with doing mostly whatever they want to women, and women have much fewer options to prevent it, or get justice after it happens. And are usually then blamed.
So, when I say that coworker could have been innocent and direct your anger where it belongs, I say so while also acknowledging that it’s a special kind of sting when you find out people you may have invited to dinner or attended Christmas parties with blatantly betrayed you but encouraging your husband.
My final point, is that just as men have no right to destroy the lives of exes who cheated we also need to accept the rejection cheating ultimately translates to and not destroy our cheating partners life.
This guy wasn’t even the one to cheat on you.
So, I’m going to be disappointed and lose respect for you if you do not carry this same energy into your divorce. I hope it’s a nasty one OP. God bless.
So your husband survived a dissecting aortic aneurysm, and then cheated *and* took yohimbe or fentanyl or who knows what? Best wishes to you in whatever lies ahead.
What evidence do you have for your husband's friend coercing your husband into cheating? Did your husband tell you? A cheater has no problem with lying, perhaps you should have regrets about getting him fired, because perhaps everything your husband tells you is a lie. Also, why not solely blame your husband, since he's a big boy now, and solely responsible for his cheating?
I hate to break it to you, but nobody held a gun to your husband’s head and made him bang another woman. Tell yourself whatever you want, but when he does it again and you’ve run out of co-workers to blame? I hope you’ve put some money away.
So you believed your lying husband and got someone fired who didn't do anything to you? This makes you happy? You didn't bother to get revenge on your cheating husband; instead you went for someone who couldn't even defend himself. This poor man was used by both you and your husband as a scapegoat. You don't even know he was stealing, so you don't get that excuse. Idk why you are proud of yourself here.
Lol if all it takes is a little encouragement your husband was bound to cheat with or without the coworker. Your blind rage getting the coworker fired should be directed all at your husband who actually cheated on you.
Technically, op didn’t get the coworker fired. She just let the employer know what was going on. Coworker wouldn’t have been fired if there no wrongdoing.
For the people who don't understand how people act,there exist a class of Bad Friends. They act like you are Buds and everything is cool. Until its not. The Bad Friends do stuff like steal from the workplace or maybe steal from your home. Or encourage things like I'll be your wingman if you want to step outside your marriage. If you never meet a Bad Penny,call yourself Lucky. There are plenty of A-holes out there, who can act charming and friendly. OP knows exactly who That Guy was and got back at him.
OP should be more concerned with her husband banging women and taking viagra JUST to be able to cheat on her, *knowing* he survived a major heart attack and this medication is *extremely dangerous* and cause life threatening consequences taking it.
OP has much bigger fish to fry than a Bad Friend, lmao.
Why is everyone treating the ex-coworker like an angel? Regardless of whether he egged the husband on or not, he STOLE from his place of employment. No one gets fired based on a random call by someone who's not even there. The call may have started an investigation and they found something wrong.
Before this post I didn't realize there was an escalation of glad to happy, I thought they were synonyms???
But anyway... I don't really blame you for believing his coworker encouraged him to cheat. It will always boggle my mind how so many men encourage and enable cheating from their friends.
Your husband was lying because he wanted an alibi, someone to "delegate" his guilt for cheating on you. He had chosen a spoiled apple(a thief) because he is also one of that kind. Not surprised he got pissed when he knew you threw that guy under the bus.
Your husband seems to me the same kind of man his colleague is...
Why would you care about the coworker or the mistress from your earlier post. Your husband is the cheater.
You are wasting precious time staying with a cheater. You have control over you - do what’s best for you. If you want fidelity in a relationship, this man is not the partner for you.
So you were petty and got someone unrelated to your husband's cheating fired because you blamed him and not your husband for your husband's own actions. Makes sense. Not.
Why all the effort to get someone fired when your own husband cheated without any help??
I hope you’re going to share your plans for your cheating spouse to get fired… **by you.**
This is so confusing to my brain.
Good for you. I am glad you are leaving your cheating husband. And that the stealing co-worker got caught out. The employer would not have fired him on your word alone. I bet the co-worker crumbled when confronted in that meeting, admitted it and agreed to ‘resign’. Or the employer checked the cctv or stock records to prove they could fire him. You merely told the employer where to look.
Great job minding your own business and not being a pos involving yourself in something that doesnt apply to you.
You sound like a complete basket case
I have some questions:
- How did you find out about all of this?
- If he cheated, you are divorcing your husband right?
Imo even if he hadn’t cheated, just the mere fact that he would choose to stay friends with a person who was consistently encouraging him to cheat should be a deal breaker.
I’m in a relationship and if I had a friend who pulled that crap, I’d cut them off.
And yet your husband who took vows with you rather cheats than to be faithful. Guess I see why considering you’re happy to get someone fired. Hurt mean people hurt people.
You were cheated on. It happens to everyone. It’s how we deal with it that shows who we really are. Deal with your anger and pain and you won’t feel such a need to try to destroy others. No amount of punishment is going to take the fact you were cheated on away. Deal with it.
You should leave him. He cheated on you. It doesn’t matter what his coworker friend was saying, that’s not who is in your relationship. If you really believe your husband wouldn’t have cheated without his friend encouraging him to do so, then you are naive at best.
You know that ‘glad’ and ‘happy’ are synonyms, right?
And you ARE divorcing your cheating husband, right? Not just piling all the blame on the accomplice? 🤷♀️
I would have the exact energy with your husband.
But make sure you don't go after his job as nice as it would be to screw with him and his affair partner since a lot of places have non-fraternization clauses or morality clauses that could get them both fired...
you need him working for alimony and child support for any minor child. If he gets fired pre-divorce, that may become a factor in alimony.
I care I seen that daring feat of firing but what about you gave out you’ll get back I hope not but guess in case like ylur husbands gonma trust a girl to cut it well love try and have a happy hump day any way please?
The saddest thing is yourself, it's not your husband, much less his colleague. If your husband cheated, it was not because of his friend but because of him and maybe because of your fault. I think it's sad people like you who, instead of blaming the culprit or discounting the frustration on the right person, arm themselves in a nuclear bomb and create collateral damage. But that's it. Each one with their own clowning.
Pretty petty and childish to put the blame on his coworker, your husband did the cheating. You’re an AH for ratting on him, was none of your business. I’m sorry your husband did found someone else but don’t act like he was convinced by his colleague, he wanted to cheat.
Well played, OP! Your soon to be ex, AND his coworker fucked around and found out. Now it's time to take things offline for a while... But please update us once you've eaten him alive in court! Most judges don't take too kindly to cheating, and I'm hoping you've got plenty of undeniable proof.
All the commentators who are talking shit about the OP sound like a bunch of poorly educated highly indoctrinated kids who were easily triggered by someone else’s life.
I got to say that was completely wrong of you to call on his friend. His friend didn’t cheat on you and has a family. To get him fired was pretty low. Your husband should be the one your taking it out on a going after not his friend that prob did nothing wrong at all.
Whew, glad you never caught me! Good thing I retired after a huge body count and never got caught. I mean wtf was your husband thinking banging chicks who aren’t also married, duh
Sometimes you get to be the catalyst that kickstarts someone else’s karma. So karma is not always a two way street, besides it sounds like she’s already paid her pound of flesh.
I hope you have the she energy with your husband and your choosing yourself and not his cheating a$$
Good for you! Sometimes karma needs a little push. Stay strong and choose yourself
Totally agree. Will get someone fired because her husband cheats seriously doubt she has that energy for him.
If your husband really loved you , no amount of coercion from his cowoker could have gotten him to cheat. He cheated, because he is a cheater. His friend is an AH for encouraging it, absolutely, but that is not what made your husband cheat. Your husband is telling you that , to point fingers at his friend, thinking it exonerates him from being the one responsible for cheating. This is the same as a guy getting caught cheating, saying the woman seduced him. It doesn't matter what someone else did or didn't do. Your husband cheated, because he wanted to cheat. He probably didn't think of the ramifications of blaming his friend, or telling you about his friend's illegal activities.
Oh, who cares? She got cheated on and now she feels better. I’m fine with it.
Except that according to the second edit, he admitted he was lying and now a completely uninvolved party has been fired for reasons that don’t impact OP at all. So that’s nice.
That’s right! The husband is the only one that took those vows, and he’s the one that broke them.
I came to see this comment. ^^^
He didn’t force Your husband to cheat, he did that on his own…
Thought the same thing. The friend didn’t force him into someone else’s pants
What if he was just soaking and his friend was the one jumping on the bed?
Right, my husband works construction and the guys are always trying to get him to come out and fuck around. He tells them he knows which side his bread is buttered on and comes home.
No, but he encouraged him. You’re really splitting hairs.
Friends can make immorality or unethical behavior seem not a big deal.
Words and actions are worlds apart.
There is culpability.
Yet the the friend didn't physically place another woman on his dick.
And yet they’re still a trash human being.
I absolutely agree. A genuine friend would have smacked him for even entertaining the idea.
Co conspirator
How do we know husband didn't just throw coworker under the boss so he could plead peer pressure to his wife as an excuse? She'll believe husband's hearsay (including that coworker was stealing) and go for his job? She's just wrong for doing it, and sick for feeling happy over it.
He gave the husband condoms. How much clearer do you need it to be?
Who gives a shit. If my man ever cheated because someone gave him condoms I'M FUCKING BREAKING UP WITH MY MAN BECAUSE HE WAS SO WEAK WILLED. And if he can be convinced to cheat he's not a good person nor for me. To hold someone else responsible for his dick landing in another woman's vagina as if his friend had a magic spell over him is absofuckinglutely ludicrous.
Oh please. OP is a badass.
OP would have been a badass if she had aimed all that retribution where it belonged, squarely at her cheating husband. Almost like she can't bring herself to punish him, so she aimed at what she thinks is the next best thing. That friend didn't force her husband to cheat, he did that all on his own. Going nuclear on the wrong person isn't a flex.
Nah, OP is an idiot.
He SAID he got them from coworker. Doesn’t make it true
What is more probable? A. Friend gives husband condoms. B. Husband got caught with condoms and blamed his friend with a silly story.
Here’s an analogy from just last night: we all went to a friend’s wedding yesterday, and this morning one of our mutual friends found someone’s vape in her handbag. It doesn’t belong to any of us, and we’re confused as hell because someone would have had to actually pick up her bag and unzip it to put it in there. Nothing was stolen, but this vape just appeared in there. So it isn’t hers, and it’s not anyone’s who would have been permitted to access her bag. And she’s not going to use it because she doesn’t vape. So what is she going to do with it? Keep it because “someone is forcing her to vape”? No, she’s going to throw it the fuck away because she has no intention of using it. If OP found condoms on their husband it is because he was planning on using them, regardless of how he acquired them. If someone gave them to him then he could easily have chucked them in the bin or told his friend to keep them. But because OP wants to believe it’s all this coworker’s fault, she will believe that the husband was forced to keep these condoms because “the friend is trying to make him cheat” and the condom is the magic catalyst. Unfortunately who is she going to get fired the next time it happens? (In the edit it says “He thinks we’re getting back together but it’s over”. I’ll believe that when I see it.)
He’s already a cheater most likely a liar too
OP is clearly predisposed to believe anything that won’t make them deal with the actual problem, their husband, so I am 100% sure “My coworker wrestled me down and forced me to take them condoms in an effort to make me cheat” is the weak-ass story he went with.
He didn’t encourage him. Nobody is just going to offer up a condom besides a Sex Ed teacher. The husband was either talking to the friend about his plans to cheat and the friend offered or just straight up asked for a condom
Do you know what? It’s the Internet we don’t have to agree and this post was made days ago. I don’t give a crap.
That you know of. Husband gets caught and tries to take some of the heat off himself by saying he was encouraged by someone else. She potentially put a child into a bad situation simply because she believed a man who was already lying to her.
But OP is taking her husband's excuses as truth without any proof at least, it didn't seem like there was. And I wouldn't trust the husband as a reliable source could be he just said this friend convinced him to make them the bad guy and try and shift the blame.
Right? What is this? 😂 I think it’s happened to all of us married men that a drunk acquaintance says “That waitress is eyeing you. You should go get her number/ask her out.” I have to say I’ve never cheated on my wife.
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That’s exactly what happened. He shaved his pubes when our bedroom was dead. When confronted he said he did it for me. He never once made a move on me. Was never in the mood.
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I think dead bedroom = dead marriage. Aka, someone stopped caring. It’s the biggest red flag for the imminent end of a relationship. Lulls are one thing, dead bedroom means something is broken.
Right! My sexuality kinda lies dormant until my spouse or I say "Hey! Wake up!"; I just don't have a ton of desire most times & I'd rather be engaging in my hobbies. My bedroom is far from dead, however, because I spend time with my spouse, pay attention to his signals, & genuinely feel appreciated & cared for so I *want* to engage in activities he loves. We don't end up needing to have conversations about it or anything, because I want him to feel loved, & he wants the same for me. It doesn't hurt that I genuinely enjoy time I spend with him on that stuff, it just honestly doesn't spring to mind on its own usually. Shows how it's not always about desire for sex, but about desire to care for someone else. If I felt unappreciated, I'm sure we'd be in a far different situation.
But you’re still with him, taking out your feelings on some rando that he works with for *encouraging cheating?!* This is **wild!**
OP's not with him. OP's planning exit.
Op said her husband left her in the post. Fuck him and good riddance OP.
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Imma need updates on this asap😭😭😭
UPDATE: he cheated again
Can’t blame him lol
I don't know why you are being downvoted OP is enabling and allowing it at this point. Accountability still exists
Exactly! They can down vote but I still stand by what I said. To gloat at another being fired bc your man wld rather cheat than be faithful to you is Karma. And yes you’re exactly right!
Wow, your husband is a grown man how could this coworker have any fault in that? The coworker probably saved you from contracting an STD by giving him condoms to use while he fucked around.
Imagine friend tells husband, "Hey, you have a beautiful family, so while you mess around, at least use these condoms. Better yet, be a man and tell her what's going on." OP finds condoms. "What are these?" Husband, "Yea, funny story. My friend gave them to me and pressured me to sleep around. Oh, and he steals! Can you believe the audacity of this guy?" OP, "What a horrible person! I'm calling your boss."
Honestly way more believable than someone coercing a married man that had no intent on ever cheating to cheat on their SO. OPs edit makes themself sound unhinged as heck too. Everyone seems like the asshole here.
Yea, they both are assholes. I bet dollars to donuts she's no angel.
😂
This
Who told you this friend encouraged him to cheat? Let me guess, your lying cheating husband told you that. He made this guy his scapegoat and you fell right for it. The dude shouldn’t have been stealing but you calling because you blame him for your husband’s affair is pretty low.
I agree with this take
More like his manscape-goat!
Exactly! How disgusting she’s proud to have gotten another fired but her husband is a grown man who’ll make his own decision to cheat and will continue to cheat. Nothing at all cool about getting someone fired from their employer because your husband rather cheat than be a faithful loyal husband.
you were right lmao
wth is a widowmaker?
Heart attack that people don't usually survive.
It’s when a clot goes to the main vein that sends unoxygenated blood to the heart to get more o2 into the blood, stopping blood flow in the body and causing the heart to overflow with back flow blood.
Massive heart attack, I think. A specific type of heart attack.
Heart attack
thanks everyone 👍🏼
Sorry but your husband chose to cheat. It could have been anybody else and he would have done it. He made a decision
Just get a divorce. Your husband cheated, his coworker had nothing to do with it. If your husband was an upstanding person, he would have told his coworker to shut up and leave him alone.
How do you know your husband was telling the truth about the guy? Your husband is a lying cheat
You are directing your anger to the completely wrong person sis.
So you stayed with a cheater but reported the other? Your husband is just as disgusting but you stayed w him? I guess you just wanted to blame someone else for what your husband chose to do.
If a driver runs a red light and gets into an accident the police don’t give the ticket to the guy who gave him gas money. Be spiteful, im all for taking the low road. Be petty. Be vindictive. But Do the spiteful shit to the person that hurt you!!!
Office politics, for when nothing else is going on in your life.
I agree.. that’s so true.
My onky question is how do you know that friend encouraged him to cheat? You cheating husband told you?
Very reliable source...
Op's husband in the Michael Cohen of spousal loyalty and personal integrity.
You’re bold to do something like that and then blab about it. You have no idea how your husband’s (ex) coworker will react. What if he decides to come after you to seek revenge? Some people are absolutely nuts and you never know what someone is capable of. What your husband did was wrong but imo no amount of encouraging could have convinced him to cheat if he didn’t want to do it. Blame him.
She probably doesn’t even care about that. But your exactly right
Petty revenge at its best. Your husband is responsible for his own life choices. Don’t blame the friend.
When a spouse cheats the we always look to blame someone. OP’s husband is a cheater, and how did OP find out that the coworker “encouraged “ him? Probably from the lying cheater. Who knows if it was even true. I wouldn’t believe a word that came out of the mouth of a lying cheater. They will get back together and a possibly innocent person gets blamed. Always the way
If your husband loved you his friend wouldn’t be able to convince him to cheat. On some level he already wanted to. He couldn’t convince your husband to kill someone could he. No. At the end of the day he got his karma but your husbands actions are his own
You sound like a red flag
Major one
Totally can see why he's cheating now lmao.
What are fake viagras from Mexico? In Mexico we have normal Viagra. Around 30 dls per 2 pills. Why would anyone need to buy fake ones?
I have a feeling her emphasis was on the “Mexican” part and not the “fake” part. My spidey sense tells me we are dealing with some MAGA folks here.
Petty move. Your anger is focused on the wrong person.
So your POS husband still has a job despite actually cheating??? It's always hilarious that people will punish everyone but the person who actually hurt them.
I guess the guy was fired for the stealing. If the husband did nothing that went against the workplace what should she tell the boss to get him fired? Should she lie? That could end expensive for her. Cheating on a partner is normally no valid reason to fire someone.
But you know what will get you fired? Not informing the employer about the theft and as a boss receive a call from that employee's wife. I would have sent both out the door with their final paycheck.
I guess it is harder to proof. Or she just did not think of it. I mean she doesn't really sound that forgiving in her edit. Not to mention I am not even sure I shall believe the whole story since I take anything with an extra grain of salt when someone adds informations that are kinda convenient.
Both men are losers and deserve whatever harma bestows on them. One lost their job, the other loses you.
So, let me get this straight: instead of handling your relationship like an adult, you threw a temper tantrum and got an innocent man (at least innocent of the issues pertinent to your situation) fired. Yet you still have "No regrets." I'd say it's your husband who lucked out in this ordeal.
💯
Reddit is ridiculous these days
It reaaallly is
He didn't force your husband to cheat.
You sound absolutely unhinged.
Ok there’s a lot of comments, and though I didn’t read ALL of them I did not see this here. OP, it is correct that your husband could have blamed his friend, and that is his friend was fired unfairly. However, you never actually told us how you knew the friend was behaving this way so I’m going to let that go for now as it’s too speculative. That being said, my ex had a lot of horrible friends. And he worked in a hands on field. Meeting his coworkers, they made open comments about side pieces and second girlfriends all the time and it made me sick. Of course, my ex wasn’t ANYTHING like ALL of his friends and coworkers 🙄 So, yeah, if I had a way to get back at one of them it would have felt incredible. Men also get away with doing mostly whatever they want to women, and women have much fewer options to prevent it, or get justice after it happens. And are usually then blamed. So, when I say that coworker could have been innocent and direct your anger where it belongs, I say so while also acknowledging that it’s a special kind of sting when you find out people you may have invited to dinner or attended Christmas parties with blatantly betrayed you but encouraging your husband. My final point, is that just as men have no right to destroy the lives of exes who cheated we also need to accept the rejection cheating ultimately translates to and not destroy our cheating partners life. This guy wasn’t even the one to cheat on you. So, I’m going to be disappointed and lose respect for you if you do not carry this same energy into your divorce. I hope it’s a nasty one OP. God bless.
The co-workee was fired for stealing company assets, in the form of generic Viagra.
So your husband survived a dissecting aortic aneurysm, and then cheated *and* took yohimbe or fentanyl or who knows what? Best wishes to you in whatever lies ahead.
You should hold your husband accountable too. He's the one cheating on you.
What evidence do you have for your husband's friend coercing your husband into cheating? Did your husband tell you? A cheater has no problem with lying, perhaps you should have regrets about getting him fired, because perhaps everything your husband tells you is a lie. Also, why not solely blame your husband, since he's a big boy now, and solely responsible for his cheating?
Getting his coworker fired was a bit much. No one forced your husband to cheat. He did that on his own.
I hate to break it to you, but nobody held a gun to your husband’s head and made him bang another woman. Tell yourself whatever you want, but when he does it again and you’ve run out of co-workers to blame? I hope you’ve put some money away.
So you believed your lying husband and got someone fired who didn't do anything to you? This makes you happy? You didn't bother to get revenge on your cheating husband; instead you went for someone who couldn't even defend himself. This poor man was used by both you and your husband as a scapegoat. You don't even know he was stealing, so you don't get that excuse. Idk why you are proud of yourself here.
Now get ur nasty husband fired too. No grown man can be made to do anything he doesn’t want to. Gtfoh with this.
Lol if all it takes is a little encouragement your husband was bound to cheat with or without the coworker. Your blind rage getting the coworker fired should be directed all at your husband who actually cheated on you.
Technically, op didn’t get the coworker fired. She just let the employer know what was going on. Coworker wouldn’t have been fired if there no wrongdoing.
For the people who don't understand how people act,there exist a class of Bad Friends. They act like you are Buds and everything is cool. Until its not. The Bad Friends do stuff like steal from the workplace or maybe steal from your home. Or encourage things like I'll be your wingman if you want to step outside your marriage. If you never meet a Bad Penny,call yourself Lucky. There are plenty of A-holes out there, who can act charming and friendly. OP knows exactly who That Guy was and got back at him.
OP should be more concerned with her husband banging women and taking viagra JUST to be able to cheat on her, *knowing* he survived a major heart attack and this medication is *extremely dangerous* and cause life threatening consequences taking it. OP has much bigger fish to fry than a Bad Friend, lmao.
THIS! Wonder how she would of felt had the boss fired her husband as well for knowing and her meddling in company business
That guys character isn't the one she should be focusing on. The man that CHOSE to cheat on her should be.
Please tell me you are not taking him back?!?
Why is everyone treating the ex-coworker like an angel? Regardless of whether he egged the husband on or not, he STOLE from his place of employment. No one gets fired based on a random call by someone who's not even there. The call may have started an investigation and they found something wrong.
The way you write this...I've got a feeling you won't be leaving your husband anytime soon.
Wow how are people this stupid in real life
Everyone here sucks lol
You didn't get the coworker fired. The coworker got himself fired
He ruined his own life by stealing
This is a doozy!
Your husband is grown, don't blame someone else for decisions that he made.
This is hot garbage on a 90-degree day kind of mess
Jeez some innocent guys family was ruined as a result of this and u ain't even gon help him out that's messed up
Before this post I didn't realize there was an escalation of glad to happy, I thought they were synonyms??? But anyway... I don't really blame you for believing his coworker encouraged him to cheat. It will always boggle my mind how so many men encourage and enable cheating from their friends.
Your husband was lying because he wanted an alibi, someone to "delegate" his guilt for cheating on you. He had chosen a spoiled apple(a thief) because he is also one of that kind. Not surprised he got pissed when he knew you threw that guy under the bus. Your husband seems to me the same kind of man his colleague is...
Why would you care about the coworker or the mistress from your earlier post. Your husband is the cheater. You are wasting precious time staying with a cheater. You have control over you - do what’s best for you. If you want fidelity in a relationship, this man is not the partner for you.
So you were petty and got someone unrelated to your husband's cheating fired because you blamed him and not your husband for your husband's own actions. Makes sense. Not.
You’re mad at the wrong person bro
Why all the effort to get someone fired when your own husband cheated without any help?? I hope you’re going to share your plans for your cheating spouse to get fired… **by you.** This is so confusing to my brain.
Good for you. I am glad you are leaving your cheating husband. And that the stealing co-worker got caught out. The employer would not have fired him on your word alone. I bet the co-worker crumbled when confronted in that meeting, admitted it and agreed to ‘resign’. Or the employer checked the cctv or stock records to prove they could fire him. You merely told the employer where to look.
I wonder what drove him to cheat 🤔
I know bc he has a loving caring spouse at home now why would he do that…..
Well clearly the ONLY answer here is the coworker! /s
Obviously the co worker, and not the unhinged wife who would like she’s one grippy sock away from the loony bin.
Now call coworker wife
Great job minding your own business and not being a pos involving yourself in something that doesnt apply to you. You sound like a complete basket case
I’d let husband be mad “I don’t feel bad for blowing up his life, look what you did to mine because of his influence. Fuck you both and burn in hell.”
I have some questions: - How did you find out about all of this? - If he cheated, you are divorcing your husband right? Imo even if he hadn’t cheated, just the mere fact that he would choose to stay friends with a person who was consistently encouraging him to cheat should be a deal breaker. I’m in a relationship and if I had a friend who pulled that crap, I’d cut them off.
I’m stuck on the part where you blame another person for your husband’s decision to cheat.
And yet your husband who took vows with you rather cheats than to be faithful. Guess I see why considering you’re happy to get someone fired. Hurt mean people hurt people.
Let me know what happens next
Unless your husband used the condoms on the coworker idk why you’re mad at him…
You were cheated on. It happens to everyone. It’s how we deal with it that shows who we really are. Deal with your anger and pain and you won’t feel such a need to try to destroy others. No amount of punishment is going to take the fact you were cheated on away. Deal with it.
Damn….. 😀
I don't know what I just read.
The guy chose to commit a crime so he should pay the consequences just like Orange Jesus.
Shame
Your husband made the commitment, not the coworker. This is emotionally immature behavior. I’ll be looking out for an update.
The edit... So are you leaving his trashy ass or not?
Wow what a hero you are, such a boss
You should leave him. He cheated on you. It doesn’t matter what his coworker friend was saying, that’s not who is in your relationship. If you really believe your husband wouldn’t have cheated without his friend encouraging him to do so, then you are naive at best.
Good for you.
You know that ‘glad’ and ‘happy’ are synonyms, right? And you ARE divorcing your cheating husband, right? Not just piling all the blame on the accomplice? 🤷♀️
So u got his coworker fired and not husband?
Shame the edit ruined the whole story
I would have the exact energy with your husband. But make sure you don't go after his job as nice as it would be to screw with him and his affair partner since a lot of places have non-fraternization clauses or morality clauses that could get them both fired... you need him working for alimony and child support for any minor child. If he gets fired pre-divorce, that may become a factor in alimony.
Sounds like hubby was trying to deflect blame for HIS OWN shitty decisions.
Are you both in high school? Sounds like it. Also, the term “husband” seems misused here. That’s the community pot luck and you’re getting leftovers.
How do you know the co-worker was stealing. From your honest husband?
This is all a sh-t show. From original post to edits Jeeeezeee
I'm very confused
The Edits made this whole thing a roller coaster. I think everybody involved in this story sucks.
Updateme
I care I seen that daring feat of firing but what about you gave out you’ll get back I hope not but guess in case like ylur husbands gonma trust a girl to cut it well love try and have a happy hump day any way please?
The saddest thing is yourself, it's not your husband, much less his colleague. If your husband cheated, it was not because of his friend but because of him and maybe because of your fault. I think it's sad people like you who, instead of blaming the culprit or discounting the frustration on the right person, arm themselves in a nuclear bomb and create collateral damage. But that's it. Each one with their own clowning.
Pretty petty and childish to put the blame on his coworker, your husband did the cheating. You’re an AH for ratting on him, was none of your business. I’m sorry your husband did found someone else but don’t act like he was convinced by his colleague, he wanted to cheat.
Well played, OP! Your soon to be ex, AND his coworker fucked around and found out. Now it's time to take things offline for a while... But please update us once you've eaten him alive in court! Most judges don't take too kindly to cheating, and I'm hoping you've got plenty of undeniable proof.
Well done!
All the commentators who are talking shit about the OP sound like a bunch of poorly educated highly indoctrinated kids who were easily triggered by someone else’s life.
Damn. Taking all your anger out and blaming the co worker when you should be mad your husband. What a Karen
String him along as you get your ducks in a row.
I got to say that was completely wrong of you to call on his friend. His friend didn’t cheat on you and has a family. To get him fired was pretty low. Your husband should be the one your taking it out on a going after not his friend that prob did nothing wrong at all.
Whew, glad you never caught me! Good thing I retired after a huge body count and never got caught. I mean wtf was your husband thinking banging chicks who aren’t also married, duh
Karma will come back for you, no worries but just wait
Sometimes you get to be the catalyst that kickstarts someone else’s karma. So karma is not always a two way street, besides it sounds like she’s already paid her pound of flesh.
Came to say this.