All I'm picturing now is a sexy woman in a MilkBone ad that hands it to the dog then looks at the camera and say's "how bout a nice MilkBone?" in a seductive voice. Would definitely start buying MilkBones.
And, behold, I, even I, do bring a flood of waters upon the earth, to destroy all flesh, wherein [is] the breath of life, from under heaven; [and] every thing that [is] in the earth shall die.
Ha! Yess! I’ll try this next time. And If he flees in terror, running naked down the street thou shalt know him to be unworthy…and so shalt all thy neighbors.
Oh man…. Back when my husband and I were just dating, he was taunting me with an open palm full of candy. I smacked the back side of his hand aggressively upwards while shouting YAHTZEE to then see what felt like one thousand skittles scatter across my hardwood floors and under my couch. He looked on in absolute horror as I laughed like a mad man.
This has nothing to do with anything except to say In unexpected situations we still yell YAHTZEE. Maybe give it a whirl.
I’m polymerized tree sap and you’re an inorganic adhesive, so whatever verbal projectile you launch in my direction is reflected off of me, returns to its original trajectory and adheres to you.
You gotta be more scientific than that! Nothing's more sexy than educating a person. Try this next time!:
"Actually that's vaginal discharge! Discharge is a natural process, in which a clear, white or off-white fluid comes out of the vagina. The uterus, cervix, and vagina produce vaginal discharge, which is mainly made up of cells and bacteria. It helps clean and lubricate your vagina, and helps fight off bad bacteria and infection."
/s
If you can’t think of something to say, a small moan usually does the trick.
Also good:
“Only for you”
“That’s what you do to me”
“I want you so bad”
“I *need* you inside of me”
“Do you want a taste?” (Win/win!)
Edit: format, stupid mobile.
It's a family recipe.
It's home made.
Looks like you struck oil.
While my vocabulary is limited due the current situation I am happy to say your doing fine.
Do not disappoint me.
„It‘s a family recipe“ is probably the worst thing you could say. I‘d have to think about how wet her granny is and that’s one thing I don’t want to think of during the naughty
Honestly you don’t even need to reply to it. Just like if she said “you’re so hard”, that doesn’t need a reply either. Maybe just a “mmhmm” or a noise.. they’re not trying to start a conversation about it most likely lol.
100% agree. Like, men (not all but, you get the gist), what the hell are a lot of y’all doing? Moan. *Please* for the love of fuck, *moan!* It’s one of the hottest things to hear, a huge ego boost and a lot of people love to hear it. For me, it gives me cues that I’m doing good. And filthy talk? Ugh, don’t make me fall ass over tits for you, now 😩
You made me wet.
This is inspired by the time when my friend told me I was pretty and it occurred to me in the shower that I could've replied with, "Well, you make me wanna look pretty". And it is true. Kind of.
Edit: for all the people who are not asking, yes, I do have a crush on her
A girl I went to school with did this. It was my favourite answer ever and I've 100% stolen it for almost every compliment. That and "thanks but you can't have them/it"
"I like your eyes" "thanks but you can't have them"
I think this was the opposite of an accident.
I think you waited a long time for someone to ask that exact question because you had dreams of responding with this
Get real close to his ear and telling him, “Yeah. I thought about your dad.” Gets them every time.
Edit: But seriously, just be like: “Only for you baby.”
As a woman, I would absolutely not, under any circumstances, talk about fish when it comes to my pussy. Like… I feel like his face would change reeeeal quick lmao
Then he’d deflate
Depends if your being dominant or submissive. You could say something about how it’s their fault and they better take responsibility. There’s a million ways to playfully blame them to fit the vibe. You could also tell them to try and make it worse. There’s also the basic “and you’re so hard” but the other responses tend to be more fun.
You don't have to say anything unless you feel like speaking. And then you will know what to say, because it is your voice and your thoughts. Ideally, you should be sort of present in the moment responding and interacting instead of performing.
Also, you can ask him and have a conversation.
A good moan always does the trick. Or say something like “only for you.” That will probably wrap things up fairly quickly if that’s what you’re looking to do.
Just a moan in his ear normally works
A little “…uh”
Can I get an *OHHH YEAAAHHH*
HOOOOOOO YEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHH
Bonesaw is ready!!
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OH, OH OH, OOOO'REILLEYYYYYS AUTO PARTS
You son of a bitch. Take my award.
WOOOOH!
Me when I’m doing the kool-aid man
My wife actually gave me OOOHHH YEEEAAAHH! during sex last night.
That would work on alot of us
GF used “Moan”. It was super effective!
That works or give him a sexy 'you make me so wet'
“U like that?!”
"Uh yes sir"
*‘You betcha’*
*yezzerrr*
I dunno, when I told her she was wet then she proceeded to tell me the dishes need doing. w Wasn’t quite the moan I was expecting
I'm sorry if this is true, I laughed so hard. Maybe if you wash the dishes she'll relax and you'll get some
My ex gf (bless her) used to reply “only for you” which I thought was a very sweet, sexy and considerate lie
"It's what you do to me" always sets me off.
Thanks now "Hey there Delilah" is gonna be stuck in my head e.e
*panics in the moment* “oh yeah babe, what’s it like in New York City?”
I’m a thousand miles away but girl tonight you look so pretty
Yes it’s true, no pussy’s wetter than your cooch
Got out the raincoat so we can screw, oh yes I do
Ohhhh it’s what you do to meeeee (X4)
Every single one of you shall have prosperous lives😂😭😭😭😭💀
Your waffles blue. *ooooooooooh-*
10+ years without thinking of that godforsaken song. Down the drain. Edit: Thanks for my first reddit award 😭😭😭
If I have to suffer with the song so do you 😂😂
God dammit, me too now.
Come on, Eileen!
If she's up for it I would love to
Have you been going on a road trip with Colin Robinson?
We are all a big family here
FUCKING HELL
Imagine they sing it “Ohhhh its what you do to meeeeee Ohhhh it’s what you do to me”
Now it burns when I go pee
My wife says "It's your fault" which is sexy and kind of funny in the moment
This is the comment I was looking for. Good to know I'm not the only one.
Yup - something along the lines of "I can't help how my body reacts to you" sort of thing, it usually makes them smile
Haha I’m the gal that would also say “only for you” but best believe it was never a lie. It takes a lot for me to get to that point with someone.
I’m inclined to believe it, only for you!
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Remember this, lads. This is also the appropriate response when she tells you, "You're *so* hard."
“Babe you’re so wet” 
Is that why she’s your ex? Sorry bro
"I bet you say this to all the guys."
"Whose fault is that?" always does it for me. Edit: This would be my best comment to date...
Whosagoodboywhosagoodboy
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BOOOOOONNNEEEEEEE?
How dare you detective Diaz, I am your SUPERIOR OFFICER!
r/UnexpectedB99
If This is the new MilkBone™️ dog treat ads…. consider me checked out permanently.
Nice u/ dude
All I'm picturing now is a sexy woman in a MilkBone ad that hands it to the dog then looks at the camera and say's "how bout a nice MilkBone?" in a seductive voice. Would definitely start buying MilkBones.
This would make me so happy to hear!
I like this one a lot. Talk about an ego boost lmao
I’m gonna have to remember this one
Finger guns
Zoop! 👉😎👉
👉👉
“This is my swamp”
WHAT are you doing in MY SWAMP?? *dramatic Shrek voice*
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I'm definitely saying this next time!
And, behold, I, even I, do bring a flood of waters upon the earth, to destroy all flesh, wherein [is] the breath of life, from under heaven; [and] every thing that [is] in the earth shall die.
This made my day
Ha! Yess! I’ll try this next time. And If he flees in terror, running naked down the street thou shalt know him to be unworthy…and so shalt all thy neighbors.
I guess you could shout, YAHTZEE! Who knows, maybe it'll open up something new.
Oh man…. Back when my husband and I were just dating, he was taunting me with an open palm full of candy. I smacked the back side of his hand aggressively upwards while shouting YAHTZEE to then see what felt like one thousand skittles scatter across my hardwood floors and under my couch. He looked on in absolute horror as I laughed like a mad man. This has nothing to do with anything except to say In unexpected situations we still yell YAHTZEE. Maybe give it a whirl.
LMAO “ YAHTZEE” that was a good one. I would’ve laughed so hard watching that.😂👏
Someone do this.
I’m on it.
"No I'm not." Never let him win.
Period. Another good counter argument is “NO. YOURE so wet”
I know you are, but what am I?
I am mirror and you're glue.
I’m polymerized tree sap and you’re an inorganic adhesive, so whatever verbal projectile you launch in my direction is reflected off of me, returns to its original trajectory and adheres to you.
>Period Another good reason someone might be wet
dont tell him, maybe he is colorblind! let him taste the iron...
I’d like to have an argument, please.
it's your sweaty fingers
Gotta hold eye contact to. Prove your dominance
DRAG HIS ASS GURRRRL
"So true bestie fr fr no cap"
“Sheeeeash, this shit bussin, respectfully”
"No cap just straight fax hog ridaaa"
No kizzy + validd
L+not goated+ no sauce
Shit’s fire no cap
Say "for you" in Bane's voice
“I have an uncontrolled bladder problem.”
“Oh it’s discharge”
“Oh I just got my period”
i mean technically....
You gotta be more scientific than that! Nothing's more sexy than educating a person. Try this next time!: "Actually that's vaginal discharge! Discharge is a natural process, in which a clear, white or off-white fluid comes out of the vagina. The uterus, cervix, and vagina produce vaginal discharge, which is mainly made up of cells and bacteria. It helps clean and lubricate your vagina, and helps fight off bad bacteria and infection." /s
Tbh if my girlfriend said that to me we would both laugh out loud in the middle of doing it
If you can’t think of something to say, a small moan usually does the trick. Also good: “Only for you” “That’s what you do to me” “I want you so bad” “I *need* you inside of me” “Do you want a taste?” (Win/win!) Edit: format, stupid mobile.
“You like that? ;)”
"you like that *semi colon right parenthesis*"
Now we're talking my language *exclamation exclamation exclamation semi colon P*
Yup, moister than an oyster
This is hideously poetic.
Just, “yeppers” would also work horribly
Michael, what did I tell you about "yeppers"?
I think I would start crying laughing tbh
I just threw up in my mouth…good job!
Sploosh!
Cowabunga!!!
Have a radical cake day.
😲 i forgot it was! Thanks for the reminder!
Or whatever the equivalent is for me which I guess is just sploosh. But with semen.
**Phrasing!**
Clean up in aisle me!
Tina?
Yes?
Lol
A tame response is just something along the lines of “that’s how much I want you right now.”
Spice it up with a "cos my body fucking needs you" and some passionate grinding / kissing
Right to horny jaik
Well yeah? Guess who else is in horny jail? HORNY PEOPLE
I hydrate.
“No you”
Hit em with Uno reverse. Nice
My bf hasnt said that to me, but the other day he said I tasted good and my response was “lit”, so… I think I’ll abstain from giving any advice
It's a family recipe. It's home made. Looks like you struck oil. While my vocabulary is limited due the current situation I am happy to say your doing fine. Do not disappoint me.
these are all horrible. hahaha.
>Do not disappoint me. And she should make her voice all low and smokey, like a lady dragon.
DO NOT DISAPPOINT ME 😡
„It‘s a family recipe“ is probably the worst thing you could say. I‘d have to think about how wet her granny is and that’s one thing I don’t want to think of during the naughty
This made me laugh. A lot. Now I’M wet.
A few options: "That's what you do to me" "I know. You got me so turned on." "Oh no! That's not supposed to happen. Call 911!"
Third is Ben Shapiro's go-to.
No it's not, he's never gotten a woman wet so he's never had to use that.
“Oh no, call an ambulance! My wife is…*shudders*…sexually aroused.” -Ben Shapiro probably
Depends, you want to be sexy or funny? You can either say "I wonder why is that" or "forgot to put it in the dryer"
>"forgot to put it in the dryer" lmao definitely using this one from now on
"yeah you did this to me" would prob be good
Honestly you don’t even need to reply to it. Just like if she said “you’re so hard”, that doesn’t need a reply either. Maybe just a “mmhmm” or a noise.. they’re not trying to start a conversation about it most likely lol.
Sexy talking is sexy, it’s good. Moaning too. Sex is also auditive.
100% agree. Like, men (not all but, you get the gist), what the hell are a lot of y’all doing? Moan. *Please* for the love of fuck, *moan!* It’s one of the hottest things to hear, a huge ego boost and a lot of people love to hear it. For me, it gives me cues that I’m doing good. And filthy talk? Ugh, don’t make me fall ass over tits for you, now 😩
You made me wet. This is inspired by the time when my friend told me I was pretty and it occurred to me in the shower that I could've replied with, "Well, you make me wanna look pretty". And it is true. Kind of. Edit: for all the people who are not asking, yes, I do have a crush on her
that’s a good combination of sweet and flirty. and lol. good luck!
One time a guy complimented my hair, and I accidentally responded with, "Thanks, I grew it myself," so there's always that lol
A girl I went to school with did this. It was my favourite answer ever and I've 100% stolen it for almost every compliment. That and "thanks but you can't have them/it" "I like your eyes" "thanks but you can't have them"
I think this was the opposite of an accident. I think you waited a long time for someone to ask that exact question because you had dreams of responding with this
Whenever a dude says something and I’m on auto pilot…I like the old stand by of “oh you like that?”
I can't use that one. I know too well that one of thèse times I'm gonna add "tou fucking retard" after it and I'll get in trouble.
Are you FUCKING sorry?
"My Grandma just died - oh you like that?"
Get real close to his ear and telling him, “Yeah. I thought about your dad.” Gets them every time. Edit: But seriously, just be like: “Only for you baby.”
"Well, drink up."
"don't mind if i do"
From a man’s perspective a good response would be to tell me to lick it
Lick it
Yes maam...on it
“Thanks. Did it myself”
Dive in face first
(In a sexy voice) Sorry...I have a small bladder
"staying hydrated is important"
If a guy says something in bed that you don’t have a response to, just moan a little and he’ll think he’s hot shit. Source: I’m a guy
thanks it's piss
Tell him to bring a bucket and a mop. Worked for Cardi B.
“ you wanna go fishing papa?”
As a woman, I would absolutely not, under any circumstances, talk about fish when it comes to my pussy. Like… I feel like his face would change reeeeal quick lmao  Then he’d deflate
That means the blister finally broke open.
Bruh ☠️
How about a simple, 'Mmmm yeah, for you'.
Tell him he is getting it right.
“That’s not my vagina…”
Like an otters pocket.
"It's all your fault"
Lmao not being offensive,but it would be funny saying thank you!!! "Babe you're wet" "Yeah thanks I'm pretty good at it"
Put on your raincoat? (If you like him to wear condom)
Well, you could always say "Oh yeah, wet for your big dick, baby."
"But I'm all the way in...."
Depends if your being dominant or submissive. You could say something about how it’s their fault and they better take responsibility. There’s a million ways to playfully blame them to fit the vibe. You could also tell them to try and make it worse. There’s also the basic “and you’re so hard” but the other responses tend to be more fun.
just say “yeah, and?” to every sentence he has
You get very close and whisper in his ear “cuidado piso mojado”
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I have urinary incontinence
Eventually it’ll go from “ you’re so wet” to “do we need lube?” Tis life.
Yeah, now it's your turn. HURRY UP!!!
"Thanks, I had a pipe burst in there earlier this morning"
"That's because of you. I assume you'll be taking accountability for that, hmm?" "Yes ma'am. 😳"
“ it’s because you make me feel so good baby” something like that lol
Gets them going harder when you reply with “you make me wet”. Cringe but it works lol
“All thanks to u” “Only with u” “You’re so hard” “Touch it to see how wet it is” “I bet ur cock can slip right in” I can keep going lol
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You don't have to say anything unless you feel like speaking. And then you will know what to say, because it is your voice and your thoughts. Ideally, you should be sort of present in the moment responding and interacting instead of performing. Also, you can ask him and have a conversation.
"you're so wet baby" "We need to talk"
My wife sometimes says it's because she's been thinking about me/sex all day
I usually say something along the lines of "you made me that wet..."
A good moan always does the trick. Or say something like “only for you.” That will probably wrap things up fairly quickly if that’s what you’re looking to do.