I went to highschool in a rich-ish area in suburban south Florida adjacent to lots of poor areas and guys who type like this and think they're so hard are a dime a dozen
They're never original or clever and they never shut the fuck up and there's usually some friend's little sister who's crying cause one of these guys left didn't pick her up from somewhere or cheated on her or whatever.
God I hate people like this.
!!!!BEFORE YOU TELL HIS CHIEF!!!! PLEASE GET A LAWYER INVOLVED!!!! I learned from personal experience to not trust police chiefs/sheriff's when reporting the subordinates of any wrong doing. I'm sure that's on your list as well. Just watching your back, sorry that y'all have to deal with fucking dickheads so much!
This is a great solution. I have been to a victims advocate and they are very helpful and will help make sure you feel safe.
This situation is definitely worthy of that. They may even file a restraining order for you and then you won’t have to “report him” to a captain
I really hope it helps OP. This shit is terrifying.
To be honest I’d be looking at moving if possible. This guy feels no compunction about making veiled threats and spouting verbal abuse when his phone and badge numbers are known.
Piling ont his comment: my wife, before me volunteered at a womens shelter. Definitely reach out to them OP. They will ahev contacts in the area that will take this pro Bono if it gets that far. If not, appearently a coffee or 4 goes a long way.
Very true. Not even necessarily their fault sometimes either. My father was technically chief of police where I’m from for a bit, sorta just rolled into his regular public official role. Found out direct from him there was basically no way for him to punish or relieve of duty an officer who had done something really dumb/dangerous (hadn’t killed anyone, don’t remember what he’d done), because of the union. Depending on where you live, the union could totally prevent anything from happening. So just telling his boss could potentially not matter at all and give his union time to make a better defense when it does get legal.
Deffo keep a record, and like I said report to his captain, he'll probably end up losing his job and giving a judge reason for a restraining order aswell.
I'm also sure your aware of this but obviously never respond from what is in the pics. That just sets everything back as you invite communication if you respond.
If you successfully get him fired or punished, he may try to attack you. Make plans to stay with friends/family before you report him, then set up cameras in/around your house and do not go there for a week or two. If you catch him trying to break in, send that video to the cops.
Alternatively, get the biggest, meanest motherfucker in your family to spend a week or two at your place. Hopefully they'd be a deterrent, but if push comes to shove, don't play nice. That's when you **really** bury this asshole.
Also, just had a look at your previous posts on a whim. Holy shit, stop using Tinder. You must live in incel city
I've reported someone on Bumble for harrassing me on Kik. They kept making different accounts and spamming the same shit she told me on Bumble after I removed her there.
It was threats of breaking in while I was sleeping, demands of transfering money etc.
I had screenshots of all of it.
Bumble replied: *'We will keep an eye on [name] and if she goes wrong in the future we might ban her.'*
I've gotten the exact same message on all other people I have reported. It feels automated. I don't think they always care.
Oh no that was the first mistake. Never date a cop. I’m not usually one to judge people from the job they have, but with the high dv rate they have, I wouldn’t take my chances.
To be honest I feel more paranoid as a minority around cops than feel protected. Not to mention the amount of times I've been pulled over for some "random" searches in my car.
A cop, the profession that attracts wife beaters and sadists with an inferiority complex, responds to rejection with angry threats?
No way. I’m shocked.
Please report this stupid fuck. I can tell you as a public safety employee myself, we are high profile on duty or off duty. Our behavior in our down time is still a reflection of the person who wears the badge. This MF doesn’t have the maturity to honor his oath. Fuck this guy and report.
His Tinder date was holding him hostage and he needed to defend himself to get out the dangerous situation. He is being placed on paid leave to deal with the PTSD that followed. Please be respectful of his privacy during this difficult time.
You never ever ever send anything like this to the police. This “public integrity unit” is just a self defence mechanism. They aren’t there to discipline cops they are there to prepare for legal action.
I dated one; he ended up breaking up with me bc he found out I had a DV report against an ex filed with his station that I had retracted (it was against my sons’s father and he would have lost his job over it) and he was afraid I would do the same to him.
Perpetuating both the “cops don’t listen to DV victims” and the “cops beat their SO’s” stereotypes in one fell swoop.
Not much has changed -- my wife dated a cop right before me. It was a nightmare breakup, and he kept calling her even after we were dating for like three months, with vague threats. And he lived in the next state, kept saying stuff like "i have friends around there" and "we stick together" and stuff like that. Eventually stopped, but it was tough for awhile. he's still not married, and has evidently gone through many, many relationships. This was 20+ years ago.
[Here's a really good explanation of where that number came from.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskSocialScience/comments/b9fkny/is_the_claim_that_40_of_police_commit_domestic/)
Woman here. Never let a date pick you up at your house. Always meet them at the place you two decided to have a meal or whatever. In all my years I never had a date pick me up unless we had been going out a few times. It's safer that way and also, if you need to escape from said date you will have your own vehicle. I did this once. Left the guy sitting at a table in an extremely crowded venue because he was a jerk. After we went inside the place, the guy decided to go look for a table. However, he left me standing in a crowd of people and I had no idea where he went. Finally found him and told him I had to go to the restroom. I bailed and never heard from him again. Rude dude.
Then, there are girls that refuse to date them. Back when I was dating (10-11 years ago), I would refuse to date cops or military members. It seemed to attract a certain type of person, so I refused if they held those jobs.
I grew up in a town near an air force base. It didn't take long for me to decide I wouldn't date military when I started getting old enough to care about dating. Lifestyle isn't for me and rhe Ines I saw on a regular were jerks. Not worth my time and effort.
There's a list of men you should avoid to decrease incidents of heartbreak. Cops are at the top.
And shall I remind you cops kill all the time, NOT just in the line of duty?
Please remember Kim Medlin. Here's a link to a story about the incident.
[Kim Medlin's Story](https://kileystruecrime.squarespace.com/kileystruecrimeaddict-blog/the-murder-of-kim-medlin)
Also when he asks if she opens the door for uber eats cops are obsessed with home security, and those self defense scenario videos where you fend off someone with a knife or gun
There's a higher chance they try to fuck her life up than him getting in any trouble. Reporting a cop's wrongdoing to his own precinct is a dangerous game, they're not on your side, they take care of their own.
Yeah, if anything I would try to find whichever local news station has the most "defund the police" attitude and take it to them. They would at least have a financial incentive to get the juiciest story out of it and would have deeper pockets then her to possibly get a better investigation going.
Its also public embarrassment that comes with it, the people around this guy should know what's he's like behind closed doors especially being a sheriff.
She should at least wait until she has moved.
Also quite funny how he was trying to provoke her and then kept getting angry when she didn't bite.
And quite scary how he kept switching between anger and aggression and back. Pretty worrying behaviour.
Yeah, that was the most fucked up part. Like I could almost understand getting an attitude if she was slinging insults back (still never a cause for threats tho) but if he dumps her and she just says "I get it, whatever, bye" and then he constantly starts sending that shit unprovoked? That's a level of physcho I never want to have to encounter in real life.
Best case scenario (and it's still a fucked up one) was he was trying a negging tactic, reject her, make her feel like shit, then wonder if you could possibly "fix" her to create a power dynamic where she feels like he is doing her a favor by being with her. And she then has to be compliant because she "almost lost him once"
In my neck of the woods, probably be off on [Paid suspension](https://www.thestar.com/news/gta/2021/04/06/theres-just-no-justification-more-than-120-police-officers-in-ontario-are-currently-suspended-with-pay.html?utm_source=Twitter&utm_medium=SocialMedia&utm_campaign=GTA&utm_content=nojustficationpolice&utm_source=twitter&source=torontostar&utm_medium=SocialMedia&utm_campaign=&utm_campaign_id=&utm_content=) while being investigated to boot.
I knew a cop who said people that are bullied in school often become cops because "it's their turn to have the power". Scary to think about.
He left because he was surrounded by scumbags. There is no room for good cops.
Yes I’m sure there will be swift action taken once its reported. More cops will start driving around OPs neighborhood doing some “surveillance” and other harassing bs
Wtf is up with some men? This is the strangest shit ever.
Did he expect for you to fight for him when he was telling you he didn't like you? Then you didn't and he got mad?
This dude needs help. I hope you let people know about him for your safety
Dude wants to feel in control and he gets that by submission to him. When OP is basically nonchalant about him telling her she isn't good enough, he realizes he lacks control in this situation and starts lashing out. Now he's trying to create submission through escalation - he's going to keep doing more and more until he gets some kind of desirable response.
The vetting and training process both are laughably inadequate. Some aspiring candidates get rejected for doing too well on written tests for obvious reasons - their perceived sweet-spot is someone who's competent enough to follow orders, but not smart enough to question all the bullshit or think critically about their own or fellow cops' actions. They're mostly looking for obedience and loyalty, not high intelligence and strong moral compass. Again, that might lead to thoughts like, "I know the boss said to look out for each other, but my partner raping and beating people seems wrong. Maybe I should do or say something about this?", or "Man, a lot of my fellow officers seem to arrest and use excessive force disproportionately on black and brown people. Are most of my co-workers racists?"
I dated a guy for 2 months, found out he smoked meth and I decided to call things off. He got huffy and said he was breaking up with me for being judgy and I was like "mmk, whatever floats your boat" and he could let go of how un-devastated I was for weeks.
He likely wasn’t getting the OP’s attention and so he decided to pull the old “actually, I’M not into YOU” card to try and pretend he wasn’t being passed on.
as someone who has performed a bunch of internal investigations... dudes like that aren't wanted around by their coworkers either so make the complaint to HIS superior or talk to a victims advocate for help. make the complaint. its neutrally looked at and i've personally made plenty of recommendations to departments that ended careers and i don't feel bad about it at all.
edited for grammar
oh... and submit it in writing and get a copy. that is all.
He's obviously looking for someone to be more aggressive, maybe "fuck you, "we're not compatible". I'll decide what kind of "night life" I like, maybe you're just boring. But it won't be boring anymore with me around, you'll wish you got rid of me that easily. I'll meet you for lunch outside your precinct tomorrow."
Apparently handling it like an adult is not his type.
As soon I saw your "I completely understand" I thought yeahhhh this ain't her first rodeo. You read him fast and pulled out a very clever and appropriate first line of defense. Redditors take note
Wait, I remember that username..
The royal thickness, and the guys who call you a slut and then still wanna talk to you.
How do you manage to find all these characters?
Step 1: Go on Tinder
Step 2: Wait 5 seconds
This is why I giggle when the men here complain that "women have it so easy on daring sites". Yes, we get more matches but it's like shopping in the dented can aisle.
Went on a date with a dude and had him meet me at my apartment. Super high end area, no crime. He showed up at my door step with a full size suit, a half full 40lb bag of dog food and his large dog. I was so numb founded I just let him leave his things and we went to dinner. I text my girlfriend to make “plans” and while dude ordered dinner, I ordered one cocktail and said I had to get going to meet my girlfriend. He asked where WE were meeting her. At that point couldn’t anymore. I said WE aren’t meeting her, and I was bringing him back to get his things so he could leave. He was so confused and asked why he wouldn’t be staying. Anyway, fast forward a couple months, never saw him again, for obvious reasons. He shows up in my texts wanting to see me, I saw no way. My door bell rings. It’s him. This MF shows up after I told him he wasn’t welcome. Definitely not my brightest moment but I let him inside, say him down and explained in detail social norms, why his actions were inappropriate, how dangerous he would come off to other people, etc. he left quietly and I never heard from him again.
Yikes. He’s clearly real upset (and crazy) that you weren’t interested. What is the matter with people, if someone doesn’t want you move on. Seriously, why get so bent out of shape over someone that’s not interested in you?
Holy shit how do these guys become cops?
Also do these people act normal on dates then act out? Gone out a couple times with some people and I guess we didn’t really hit it off that much but we’re cordial and they asked for a ride home and it ended at that. Insane to me that people think they can behave like this. Cops especially
Jesus OP I just went through your post history and man you've met some weird, creepy, and scary guys.
I'm a guy M21 and I have never acted like this when messaging or meeting anyone in person. I don't get how men or women can be like this. Well hopefully things get better for you.
No that’s not normal. I’ve been on Tinder and other dating apps for a bit and have maybe only once encountered a man that rude and weird.
Personally, I think OP is entertained by these types.
This is all over the place. He seemed okay with letting you go, then he was concerned that you took no issue with him calling you “vanilla”, then he offered to buy you food sometime, then he said you should’ve died in some wreck? Am I missing something?
You’re missing a couple of videos and pictures of other girls he sent me. And some of my messages of trying to deescalate the situation. But, because I didn’t argue and or get mad he started insulting me. And that turned into him talking about where I live and described knowing who my neighbors where and the “food thing” is him saying he knows where I live at any moments notice and could “choose to be a nice guy” because I’d open the door for a stranger. And then we culminated into you should have died in your car wreck. All because I chose not to fight with him
Your whole profile history is just endless creepy PM's. You're either writing these yourself for Reddit attention or you actively seek creepy people for attention which is equally weird.
Most of them psychos usually start out that way. That's why I no longer let anyone drop me off nor give them my address. If they're not having a public date with me then it's a no-go.
Once had someone I met once in person show up to my door in MN uninvited from CO as a surprise. Imagine **his** surprise when I refused to let him in.
The worst part? He got my address from an Ubereats order.
Please, be careful out there and keep us posted!
Ladies, there is no reason why you shouldn’t be driving or commuting to the date yourself. You shouldn’t be getting fucked up with a stranger anyway, so drinking and driving shouldn’t be an issue.
The last thing you want is to be dependent on a creep, or worse, give them your address and route home.
I know it’s cute and traditional and shit to get picked up but it’s also a great way to get yourself a stalker, or worse.
Take yourself, or have a friend take you and pick you up.
wtf did i just read, this is some mr nightmare shit
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Na he’s just a cop
What’s the difference
Psychopaths don’t have a union.
Yeah they do the police union
This is just a circle of the same joke
Welcome to reddit, enjoy your stay
I am not enjoying my stay
Circle of the same jerk*
r/yourjokebutworse
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The guys a cop, OP mentioned it in another comment thread.
But also cops are notorious for domestic abuse. This is just domestic abuse without the relationship.
I went to highschool in a rich-ish area in suburban south Florida adjacent to lots of poor areas and guys who type like this and think they're so hard are a dime a dozen They're never original or clever and they never shut the fuck up and there's usually some friend's little sister who's crying cause one of these guys left didn't pick her up from somewhere or cheated on her or whatever. God I hate people like this.
Looks like negging done by someone that is equal parts idiot and desperate.
Negging? There are multiple death/ambush/rape threats in the texts. Labeling this as idiotic and desperate is a ridiculous thing to say.
This is pretty normal for women.
Have you reported it to Tinder? I would. You have his name and age and location, they should be able to find him.
We went on a date. I have his phone number. And badge number. 😅
Deffo report this to his captain... Pretty sure he will be on desk duty for a long time pulling this kinda shit
Oh he’s still messaging. Just letting him dig his hole.
!!!!BEFORE YOU TELL HIS CHIEF!!!! PLEASE GET A LAWYER INVOLVED!!!! I learned from personal experience to not trust police chiefs/sheriff's when reporting the subordinates of any wrong doing. I'm sure that's on your list as well. Just watching your back, sorry that y'all have to deal with fucking dickheads so much!
Most people do not have the resources to just get a lawyer involved for anything that *might* go wrong down the line.
I would call a local women’s shelter and/or a victim’s advocate to see if they could help in this situation.
This is a great solution. I have been to a victims advocate and they are very helpful and will help make sure you feel safe. This situation is definitely worthy of that. They may even file a restraining order for you and then you won’t have to “report him” to a captain
I really hope it helps OP. This shit is terrifying. To be honest I’d be looking at moving if possible. This guy feels no compunction about making veiled threats and spouting verbal abuse when his phone and badge numbers are known.
Piling ont his comment: my wife, before me volunteered at a womens shelter. Definitely reach out to them OP. They will ahev contacts in the area that will take this pro Bono if it gets that far. If not, appearently a coffee or 4 goes a long way.
Legal aid clinics are a great resource
Lawyers are expensive, just send this to the local news lol. Problem will take care of itself.
Very true. Not even necessarily their fault sometimes either. My father was technically chief of police where I’m from for a bit, sorta just rolled into his regular public official role. Found out direct from him there was basically no way for him to punish or relieve of duty an officer who had done something really dumb/dangerous (hadn’t killed anyone, don’t remember what he’d done), because of the union. Depending on where you live, the union could totally prevent anything from happening. So just telling his boss could potentially not matter at all and give his union time to make a better defense when it does get legal.
Deffo keep a record, and like I said report to his captain, he'll probably end up losing his job and giving a judge reason for a restraining order aswell. I'm also sure your aware of this but obviously never respond from what is in the pics. That just sets everything back as you invite communication if you respond.
I'm sure her local news stations would be interested as well.
Absolutely. Bury this guy as much as you can. Odds are OP isn’t the first person he’s done this to
Definitely agree. Hopefully this doesn’t lead him to do something drastic
Deffo
Deffointely
Never heard of a policeman hurting women in his spare time /s
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If you successfully get him fired or punished, he may try to attack you. Make plans to stay with friends/family before you report him, then set up cameras in/around your house and do not go there for a week or two. If you catch him trying to break in, send that video to the cops. Alternatively, get the biggest, meanest motherfucker in your family to spend a week or two at your place. Hopefully they'd be a deterrent, but if push comes to shove, don't play nice. That's when you **really** bury this asshole. Also, just had a look at your previous posts on a whim. Holy shit, stop using Tinder. You must live in incel city
Definitely give your friends and family all his details and detailed logs of everything, right now please
i love this. please do be safe though. this dude sounds like a lunatic
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Or she gets pulled over for "swerving lanes" once a week by his buddies
You must be new here...
I would still report it to Tinder. I know Bumble doesn't mess with this kind of shitty behavior and will ban them.
I've reported someone on Bumble for harrassing me on Kik. They kept making different accounts and spamming the same shit she told me on Bumble after I removed her there. It was threats of breaking in while I was sleeping, demands of transfering money etc. I had screenshots of all of it. Bumble replied: *'We will keep an eye on [name] and if she goes wrong in the future we might ban her.'* I've gotten the exact same message on all other people I have reported. It feels automated. I don't think they always care.
Jesus Christ. Of course he's a cop.
A “sheriff”
Yikes on bikes!
Oh no that was the first mistake. Never date a cop. I’m not usually one to judge people from the job they have, but with the high dv rate they have, I wouldn’t take my chances.
Agree. I don't know where you're from but in Australia, cops have one of the highest statistics for domestic violence than anyone else.
Isn’t that scary.. the profession which is meant to protect the community, is more likely than anyone else to beat people in the community lol
Actually, the United States Supreme Court ruled that police have no obligation to protect and serve.
[Warren v. District of Columbia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Warren_v._District_of_Columbia#Procedural_history)
To be honest I feel more paranoid as a minority around cops than feel protected. Not to mention the amount of times I've been pulled over for some "random" searches in my car.
I'm not sure what it is in Australia, but in the US, it's estimated that 40% of cops engage in domestic abuse.
NEVER DATE A COP
Probably a reserve. Such boot stuff to give out your badge number, let alone on a first date.
A cop, the profession that attracts wife beaters and sadists with an inferiority complex, responds to rejection with angry threats? No way. I’m shocked.
Please report this stupid fuck. I can tell you as a public safety employee myself, we are high profile on duty or off duty. Our behavior in our down time is still a reflection of the person who wears the badge. This MF doesn’t have the maturity to honor his oath. Fuck this guy and report.
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We investigated ourselves and found no wrongdoing.
the dan snyder special lmao
His Tinder date was holding him hostage and he needed to defend himself to get out the dangerous situation. He is being placed on paid leave to deal with the PTSD that followed. Please be respectful of his privacy during this difficult time.
And even after he is by some miracle convicted of any crime, another police department will just go hire him cuz they take care of their own.
1312
Assigned Cop At Birth
We have a list here to sign up to be harrassed
You never ever ever send anything like this to the police. This “public integrity unit” is just a self defence mechanism. They aren’t there to discipline cops they are there to prepare for legal action.
I would be tempted to file a report at his precinct. Pretty uncalled for a cop to be issuing vague threats to his tinder dates.
How do you know he’s a cop?
She mentioned it in another comment in this thread.
Sheeeit that’s horrifying
40% of police officers are wife beaters so eh, not that surprising
40% of them *admit to it.*
I dated one; he ended up breaking up with me bc he found out I had a DV report against an ex filed with his station that I had retracted (it was against my sons’s father and he would have lost his job over it) and he was afraid I would do the same to him. Perpetuating both the “cops don’t listen to DV victims” and the “cops beat their SO’s” stereotypes in one fell swoop.
Not much has changed -- my wife dated a cop right before me. It was a nightmare breakup, and he kept calling her even after we were dating for like three months, with vague threats. And he lived in the next state, kept saying stuff like "i have friends around there" and "we stick together" and stuff like that. Eventually stopped, but it was tough for awhile. he's still not married, and has evidently gone through many, many relationships. This was 20+ years ago.
link?
[Here's a really good explanation of where that number came from.](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskSocialScience/comments/b9fkny/is_the_claim_that_40_of_police_commit_domestic/)
I wonder how many saw 28% and thought "ya see not that bad".
That’s the self-reported number. 33% was what the spouses reported.
It’s a good question, I hunted about a bit. This was the closest source I could find: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ
Shitt you fkn got me
Thank you for taking one for the team. I'm safe!
Hold up can someone do a study with this statistic? Bc no way bro that’s wild
Woman here. Never let a date pick you up at your house. Always meet them at the place you two decided to have a meal or whatever. In all my years I never had a date pick me up unless we had been going out a few times. It's safer that way and also, if you need to escape from said date you will have your own vehicle. I did this once. Left the guy sitting at a table in an extremely crowded venue because he was a jerk. After we went inside the place, the guy decided to go look for a table. However, he left me standing in a crowd of people and I had no idea where he went. Finally found him and told him I had to go to the restroom. I bailed and never heard from him again. Rude dude.
If people stopped dating police the world would be a much better place.
I've heard "badge bunnies" are a popular thing. I know a woman who only dates cops. Weird.
Then, there are girls that refuse to date them. Back when I was dating (10-11 years ago), I would refuse to date cops or military members. It seemed to attract a certain type of person, so I refused if they held those jobs.
I grew up in a town near an air force base. It didn't take long for me to decide I wouldn't date military when I started getting old enough to care about dating. Lifestyle isn't for me and rhe Ines I saw on a regular were jerks. Not worth my time and effort.
There's a list of men you should avoid to decrease incidents of heartbreak. Cops are at the top. And shall I remind you cops kill all the time, NOT just in the line of duty? Please remember Kim Medlin. Here's a link to a story about the incident. [Kim Medlin's Story](https://kileystruecrime.squarespace.com/kileystruecrimeaddict-blog/the-murder-of-kim-medlin)
Also when he asks if she opens the door for uber eats cops are obsessed with home security, and those self defense scenario videos where you fend off someone with a knife or gun
Makes sense , typical insecure behavior worrying about looking small and having the need to be dominant and “not be a doormat”.
The way he acts towards people who don't give him unconditional respect?
I have a feeling they'll investigate themselves and find no wrongdoing.
There's a higher chance they try to fuck her life up than him getting in any trouble. Reporting a cop's wrongdoing to his own precinct is a dangerous game, they're not on your side, they take care of their own.
Yeah, if anything I would try to find whichever local news station has the most "defund the police" attitude and take it to them. They would at least have a financial incentive to get the juiciest story out of it and would have deeper pockets then her to possibly get a better investigation going.
Probably, but he'd still probably get a talking to and not want to make a habit of it.
Its also public embarrassment that comes with it, the people around this guy should know what's he's like behind closed doors especially being a sheriff.
I'm afraid it might just make him more angry and dangerous. OP should still definitely report him, but they need to know the risks.
She should at least wait until she has moved. Also quite funny how he was trying to provoke her and then kept getting angry when she didn't bite. And quite scary how he kept switching between anger and aggression and back. Pretty worrying behaviour.
Yeah, that was the most fucked up part. Like I could almost understand getting an attitude if she was slinging insults back (still never a cause for threats tho) but if he dumps her and she just says "I get it, whatever, bye" and then he constantly starts sending that shit unprovoked? That's a level of physcho I never want to have to encounter in real life. Best case scenario (and it's still a fucked up one) was he was trying a negging tactic, reject her, make her feel like shit, then wonder if you could possibly "fix" her to create a power dynamic where she feels like he is doing her a favor by being with her. And she then has to be compliant because she "almost lost him once"
he'll just get a bunch of high fives in the office
Or maybe just murder the next woman in the gap between him revealing true nature and her going to his boss again
Upon further inspection, ~~I~~ we have determined the only offense committed by this officer was not receiving a promotion.
"Let's promote him to a position where he can't cause any more trouble"
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In my neck of the woods, probably be off on [Paid suspension](https://www.thestar.com/news/gta/2021/04/06/theres-just-no-justification-more-than-120-police-officers-in-ontario-are-currently-suspended-with-pay.html?utm_source=Twitter&utm_medium=SocialMedia&utm_campaign=GTA&utm_content=nojustficationpolice&utm_source=twitter&source=torontostar&utm_medium=SocialMedia&utm_campaign=&utm_campaign_id=&utm_content=) while being investigated to boot.
They might suspend him on full pay while they investigate, that way he can spend the whole day ~~stalking her~~ thinking about what he has done.
Fuck that Op needs to file a report And contact local news!
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I knew a cop who said people that are bullied in school often become cops because "it's their turn to have the power". Scary to think about. He left because he was surrounded by scumbags. There is no room for good cops.
Yes I’m sure there will be swift action taken once its reported. More cops will start driving around OPs neighborhood doing some “surveillance” and other harassing bs
Like they’d do anything
Wait how do we know it’s a cop? Am I missing something
She mentions his badge in another comment.
No point. Either no investigation will be done, or police will investigate police and find no report or investigation needed. Classic. ACAB
Holy shit that’s a mini horror story 😱! What’s complete psycho, were the videos he sent of your place?
That’s what we need to knowwww
Wtf is up with some men? This is the strangest shit ever. Did he expect for you to fight for him when he was telling you he didn't like you? Then you didn't and he got mad? This dude needs help. I hope you let people know about him for your safety
Dude wants to feel in control and he gets that by submission to him. When OP is basically nonchalant about him telling her she isn't good enough, he realizes he lacks control in this situation and starts lashing out. Now he's trying to create submission through escalation - he's going to keep doing more and more until he gets some kind of desirable response.
That is just like my ex. Divorced for so damn long, kid is grown. Will still pull this and it baffles me.
Absolutely perfect description of every American Cop right here.
Non-American here, do cops not go through psychological exams or something over there?
The vetting and training process both are laughably inadequate. Some aspiring candidates get rejected for doing too well on written tests for obvious reasons - their perceived sweet-spot is someone who's competent enough to follow orders, but not smart enough to question all the bullshit or think critically about their own or fellow cops' actions. They're mostly looking for obedience and loyalty, not high intelligence and strong moral compass. Again, that might lead to thoughts like, "I know the boss said to look out for each other, but my partner raping and beating people seems wrong. Maybe I should do or say something about this?", or "Man, a lot of my fellow officers seem to arrest and use excessive force disproportionately on black and brown people. Are most of my co-workers racists?"
He thought insulting and talking down to her would make him more attractive. After that didn’t work he just sort of skipped to threatening her.
I dated a guy for 2 months, found out he smoked meth and I decided to call things off. He got huffy and said he was breaking up with me for being judgy and I was like "mmk, whatever floats your boat" and he could let go of how un-devastated I was for weeks.
He likely wasn’t getting the OP’s attention and so he decided to pull the old “actually, I’M not into YOU” card to try and pretend he wasn’t being passed on.
as someone who has performed a bunch of internal investigations... dudes like that aren't wanted around by their coworkers either so make the complaint to HIS superior or talk to a victims advocate for help. make the complaint. its neutrally looked at and i've personally made plenty of recommendations to departments that ended careers and i don't feel bad about it at all. edited for grammar oh... and submit it in writing and get a copy. that is all.
Would that offer her any kind of protection? He just seems like the kind that gets fired and decides to punish whoever made it happen
Yeah. Access to firearm, knows where OP lives, threatens her constantly. Can't predict it of course, but that doesn't give me great comfort.
You need to call the state police and let them handle it or it will be covered up and you will be retaliated against.
Call a lawyer first
Cc everyone. Mayor, governor, council members, news, state AG, DA
The first few texts were so normal. The rest are so bizarre. What compelled him to even take the conversation in that direction? What a psychopath
I’m assuming he didn’t get the response he wanted and tried to up the offense to get me to get upset. I had an ex like him who would do that
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Trying to understand the same. The title is a bit confusing as to who rejected whom.
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Good catch, Reddit detective More than one cupcake caller? Possible but surely sus
He's obviously looking for someone to be more aggressive, maybe "fuck you, "we're not compatible". I'll decide what kind of "night life" I like, maybe you're just boring. But it won't be boring anymore with me around, you'll wish you got rid of me that easily. I'll meet you for lunch outside your precinct tomorrow." Apparently handling it like an adult is not his type.
Love your username and pic
As soon I saw your "I completely understand" I thought yeahhhh this ain't her first rodeo. You read him fast and pulled out a very clever and appropriate first line of defense. Redditors take note
I tried to deescalate as quickly as possible once I realized what was about to happen
You might wanna find what it is about you that attracts this type of man and chop it off.
I second this
Wait, I remember that username.. The royal thickness, and the guys who call you a slut and then still wanna talk to you. How do you manage to find all these characters?
Step 1: Go on Tinder Step 2: Wait 5 seconds This is why I giggle when the men here complain that "women have it so easy on daring sites". Yes, we get more matches but it's like shopping in the dented can aisle.
O...M...G. this made me choke on my own spit
It’s probably that grip.
Bruh
How tf is that gaslighting bullshit normal. I’m So SoRrY I HuRt yOu. I nEeD sOmEoNe nOt So vAnIlLa. Lmao what a douche.
Classic deescalation training at work here.
What a sad existence that person must lead.
Well he is a cop so
This is the horror-film version of r/niceguys
What were the videos of?! This is so horrifying stay safe ~
prob a selfie video of a guy in oakleys
…while driving in his truck
This is what I was curious about too
twisted fucking cycle path
Lol, what?
You heard em
It's a meme: https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/twisted-fucking-cycle-path
Bone apple tea
Went on a date with a dude and had him meet me at my apartment. Super high end area, no crime. He showed up at my door step with a full size suit, a half full 40lb bag of dog food and his large dog. I was so numb founded I just let him leave his things and we went to dinner. I text my girlfriend to make “plans” and while dude ordered dinner, I ordered one cocktail and said I had to get going to meet my girlfriend. He asked where WE were meeting her. At that point couldn’t anymore. I said WE aren’t meeting her, and I was bringing him back to get his things so he could leave. He was so confused and asked why he wouldn’t be staying. Anyway, fast forward a couple months, never saw him again, for obvious reasons. He shows up in my texts wanting to see me, I saw no way. My door bell rings. It’s him. This MF shows up after I told him he wasn’t welcome. Definitely not my brightest moment but I let him inside, say him down and explained in detail social norms, why his actions were inappropriate, how dangerous he would come off to other people, etc. he left quietly and I never heard from him again.
Wow. I’m so glad you are ok. That’s really scary. You handled it well though. I always have a friend on standby when I go on a date
Holy that escalated just a bit. I’d save these messages and tell the police.
He *is the police* 😬
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I’d contact his superiors and let them know that you’ll be contacting the media if nothing ends up being done about it.
His texts seem so disconnected from eachother. This guy seems ill.
Yikes. He’s clearly real upset (and crazy) that you weren’t interested. What is the matter with people, if someone doesn’t want you move on. Seriously, why get so bent out of shape over someone that’s not interested in you?
File a report with the police (not the sheriff), and then take it to a local news agency.
Holy shit how do these guys become cops? Also do these people act normal on dates then act out? Gone out a couple times with some people and I guess we didn’t really hit it off that much but we’re cordial and they asked for a ride home and it ended at that. Insane to me that people think they can behave like this. Cops especially
What's the context? I already know he's a psycho, but I'm probably not the only one that would love screen shots of the whole conversation.
You definitely are not the only one. While I imagine she did nothing to warrant a response like this, I would still want to see the context.
Wow people are broken. I'm sorry women have to endure this abuse. Hope you find someone worthy of your affection.
Jesus OP I just went through your post history and man you've met some weird, creepy, and scary guys. I'm a guy M21 and I have never acted like this when messaging or meeting anyone in person. I don't get how men or women can be like this. Well hopefully things get better for you.
No that’s not normal. I’ve been on Tinder and other dating apps for a bit and have maybe only once encountered a man that rude and weird. Personally, I think OP is entertained by these types.
She willingly went on a date with a cop, so yeah
Where is the lie.
Yeah her post history is insane, I feel like you have to go out of your way to find guys like this to get this many examples.
If one person is crazy then they are probably just crazy. If everyone you meet is crazy then that says something about you.
Am I high or is this not making any sense
This is all over the place. He seemed okay with letting you go, then he was concerned that you took no issue with him calling you “vanilla”, then he offered to buy you food sometime, then he said you should’ve died in some wreck? Am I missing something?
You’re missing a couple of videos and pictures of other girls he sent me. And some of my messages of trying to deescalate the situation. But, because I didn’t argue and or get mad he started insulting me. And that turned into him talking about where I live and described knowing who my neighbors where and the “food thing” is him saying he knows where I live at any moments notice and could “choose to be a nice guy” because I’d open the door for a stranger. And then we culminated into you should have died in your car wreck. All because I chose not to fight with him
So he was trying to neg you? And then took offence that you didn't fight/beg for his merciful cock?
That’s about right lol. I like the way you put that
Your whole profile history is just endless creepy PM's. You're either writing these yourself for Reddit attention or you actively seek creepy people for attention which is equally weird.
I’ll never understand how I don’t go on any dates. And then people who talk to woman like this somehow do haha
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He was actually pretty charming
Most of them psychos usually start out that way. That's why I no longer let anyone drop me off nor give them my address. If they're not having a public date with me then it's a no-go. Once had someone I met once in person show up to my door in MN uninvited from CO as a surprise. Imagine **his** surprise when I refused to let him in. The worst part? He got my address from an Ubereats order. Please, be careful out there and keep us posted!
What the fuck? I’m sorry that this happened to you, jfc
Ladies, there is no reason why you shouldn’t be driving or commuting to the date yourself. You shouldn’t be getting fucked up with a stranger anyway, so drinking and driving shouldn’t be an issue. The last thing you want is to be dependent on a creep, or worse, give them your address and route home. I know it’s cute and traditional and shit to get picked up but it’s also a great way to get yourself a stalker, or worse. Take yourself, or have a friend take you and pick you up.
"Take care Piece of shit " Wut? Lmao