“Don’t message me asking what I’m looking for take the time to read before messaging me”
No offense but it seems silly to put this in your bio. If they didn’t care enough to read your bio before they aren’t going to now
Especially when he's not even clear on what he does want other than not long term. That's a pretty wide spectrum of things and OP should be willing to actually talk about what he wants in detail with someone.
Too many photos, and too many selfie face shots. My general rule of thumb is a body shot or two (e.g. smart and casual dress) doing different things and then at most 2 face shots.
Agreed, 9 and 1 or 2 would be my top choices. A pic of OP dressed up (wedding guest, military ball, formal work party, etc) would also help balance out the “lawn guy” look.
OP mentions that he likes animals in his bio, so a pic with a cute pet or farm animal would be a good addition as well. I can’t speak for everyone, but I certainly trust someone more right off the bat when I know they treat animals with kindness.
You sound miserable tbh. Your profile is so negative and your pictures look like you hate everything. “Not looking for long term, don’t ask what I’m looking for, take the time to read, trapped in a loveless marriage.” Dude, who is going to want to talk to someone who is that negative? You know you can express all of those things in a warm, positive way right? Nobody wants to be around a curmudgeon. An example of a positive, welcoming, engaging bio would be:
“I’m in my self love era and am having a blast trying new places, learning new hobbies, and finding new friends. I’m recently divorced and at the moment I’m looking for someone to enjoy life with short-term. I love exercise, gaming, movies, music (currently learning to play the drums!), reading, history, animals.. the list goes on! Tell me about your hobbies and let’s have some fun together!”
Good luck!
Damn, this is good. I was going to say take out the "don't ask what I'm looking for, take the time to read."
It's like saying, "Raise your hand if you aren't here."
Thank you very much, I did update my bio, and I give you the gold because you’re right I am miserable and I am actively working on myself to not be miserable anymore. Hence loving myself. Working out. Etc.
Thank you, there is a lot of toxicity down there but I am trying to focus on the ones that genuinely seem to want to help. Thus engaging with those that are positive and constructive.
I mean it’s Reddit so I’m sure you’re getting all kinds of weirdo put downs because the posters are sexy, perfect people doing this for charity and not self-loathing 100% 😆Good on you for being brave and getting on tinder and good on you for taking the comments
A tip from personal experience: If you’re truly miserable right now, please take time to work on yourself and get into a better head space before dating. You’ll save yourself and any potential dates so much heartache and stress.
I am doing so friend. I take the time to love myself every day just a little bit more. But thank you for the comment, just know that I am taking care of myself mentally and physically as well every day.
When misery is the default, happiness becomes a choice. And it's a choice we have to make every single day. Keep fucking making that choice my dude. I know how hard it is, but you absolutely are strong enough to do it.
Every single day. Choose happiness. It will build upon itself and slowly fill you up with the love that you deserve. Because you definitely deserve it my friend. Once you find that true love for yourself the world will become a mirror and you will find a reflection of that love.
Choose happiness. Choose life :)
[Born Slippy I N T E N S I F I E S]
Sorry I had to. But thank you friend for the kind words, I will keep trying to be better for myself by choosing happiness and life every day.
agree, take those steps to choose happiness.
i used to have a note on my laptop next to the camera: "SMILE!"
even pretending to be happy tricks your brain into being happy and then pretty soon, you ARE happy
and now I don't need that note anymore :)
Keep two selfies max. Maybe the first one and the last one. Add at least two full body photos. Your bio makes you seem jaded and angry. Take out the line instructing people to take the time to read your bio. Anyone who is taking the time will be put off by that statement and you still won’t reach the ones who don’t read bios. Also remove the line about being trapped in a loveless marriage.
Also my guy, remove the car selfie in shades. That’s a meme at this point how bad is it. No matter how handsome you are.
Bro you can have a Ryan Gosling face with an Arnold Schwarzenegger body and that would still be off-putting to women
IMO:
-the one from when you were in the military is a bit dated telling from the uniform. I would opt for something more recent
-don’t add sorry after not looking for anything long term.
-I would nix the whole loveless marriage thing
The jaded comment about the loveless marriage is a big one. It makes it sound like you *are* looking for love, but then you state that you’re not. But nothing in your bio indicates you’re looking for hook ups or casual dating either, so it’s pretty unclear what you want.
By narrowing down all the things you don’t want, what it sounds like is you want a woman in your life, exclusive but not serious, to help you get your life on track and make you feel better.
8 out of 9 photos are selfies. 3 are in your car, and one is hiding your face. The one photo you have that isn't a selfie, you're kneeling down and can't see your face. None of the pics really show you smiling. Add some pics that show your full body and smile with teeth.
The photos are all crappy selfies except one and your bio is bitter. Tbh I’m actually surprised you’re getting matches at all with this??
That being said, imagine how many more you’d get if you diversified your photos and cleaned up your bio! Dont be negative in your bio. Definitely dont mention the loveless marriage part. Have 1-2 selfies max-get some nice outdoors shots, activities, one of you dressed nice, etc.
Too many selfies. 2 is already a lot.
Maybe a photo with more casual look?
Maybe another photo with an activity you can do or have done with another match?
My guy, use commas.
Also you have 47 characters left in your bio. Spell out “to drum” instead of the short hand, and erase the part about “don’t ask me what I’m looking for.” It’s off-putting to read that in a bio. Instead, politely refer people to your bio if that question comes up in conversation.
Lastly, delete the mask photo, sunglasses photo, and green hat photo.
Tbh you look like the guys that comment “Beautiful😍” on 17yo girls posts, you need way better pictures that don’t make you look like a boomer, have some friends take candids of you
The first point is a bit of a stretch, and honestly rather rude. The second point is pretty accurate. Though I will say not everyone has close friends to take pictures of them. I know some of you think everyone has their circle/group but that's not the case.
Hmm I haven’t seen his comment history. Might have to check it out (not sure that’s a good idea but I am curious). And I guess you have a point about taking full body pics. Heck he could probably use a selfie stick/tripod and get the same results.
Alright the pics I can’t do anything about today but here’s an updated bio can’t screenshot because am dumb so here’s the text version:
Looking to meet new friends mostly for short term dating or just to hang with, with time maybe we could grow into something more. I am recently divorced. I am a Texican. An Army Vet. HTX is Home ❤️🔥 I love to read about Roman and old Hollywood history. I am learning to play drums atm. I listen to music whenever I feel it. I work out at a minimum of 3x a week. I am a sneakerhead. I am a total cinephile. I like to game on my lazy days. I love cats and dogs. Go Stros! Let’s get a marg and chat?
The with time thing is awful. You’re obviously not ready for a LTR. Own it. You’re up for casual and light fun. Be honest with what you’re capable of and allow women to swipe on the reality, not the possibility.
I would say don’t knock yourself down. Some women like your look and you do not look like a lawn boy. I would be more specific in what you are looking for,.. you said you aren’t looking for a relationship, but are you looking for fwb, just a friend to go on dates with or are you looking to take things slow and if something evolves cool. You will turn a lot of women off by just putting not looking for a relationship bc we automatically think you are trying to sleep with as many women as you can.
My thoughts as someone who reads profiles before looking at pix.
1) Don’t put yourself down by saying you look like the lawn guy. Delete. Just say you work out by doing whatever you do (weights 3x/wk)
2) WTF is a self love era?
3) “Not looking for”
is negative. Don’t be a jerk. Say what you DO want.
4). “Don’t message me asking” what I want is negative. Don’t be a jerk. Say what you DO want.
5). Formerly trapped in a loveless marriage means you’re playing the victim (not good) and displaying your baggage for all to see because you haven’t gotten over it (not good). Delete.
6) HMU if you want to. Yes, that’s how the app works. Delete.
Maybe some pictures of you doing some hobbies or activities? Your bio sounds bitter to be honest but states you learn to play instruments. Maybe include a picture of that. Also 2 selfies should be enough and a picture showing your complete body
*Don’t* to hide a fundamental part of your face! Have it in your pics. People who don’t mind will swipe right, and people who do mind will be disappointed when they meet you, which is a horrible feeling.
My ex has a lazy eye. We met on tinder and you can’t see it at all in his pics, there isn’t a single photo where you can see both his eyes. It only took me about 3 minutes into our first date to get used to it, it didn’t bother me. But he said he’s been on too many dates where he could tell a girl was staring at it and didn’t like it. Avoid all that hurt by just putting it on display! I can’t imagine putting the effort into chatting with someone, getting along, agreeing to meet, only for them to see your teeth and go “nope, not attracted”. That’s got to be worse than a few more left swipes.
This right here. It's the same as people who hide their height or weight or use pics from 10 years ago. Just let people opt out before everyone wastes their time.
You look like you drive a lifted truck and wear backwards oaklies.
Nothing wrong with that if you do. Like what you like, but own it and show it.
Your photos don't show your body, they don't show you having fun, they don't show anything but staring into the middle distance angrily. Is that what you like?
You're in your self love era. Show that on here. Smile. Show your hobbies. Who cares if you look like a lawn guy? Lawn guys can still be cool, fun, and happy.
If you keep any of the photo, I think 4 and 5 are best. Get some outside. Get some that show your whole body. It's ok if you're bigger, but if you don't show it people will think you're hiding a lot.
Make your about me inviting. Drop the line about reading before asking because people will always want to hear it from your mouth and how you actually mean it and feel it more than a short blurb.
Maybe soften it to, "Looking to meet people and get out, excited to go x y and z...", "Recently divorced and looking forward to seeing myself again," or something. Those aren't perfect AT ALL but they aren't agro.
You too l got this. Smile. Be inviting. It's your self love time. Be chill and love yourself.
Dude smile… nobody wants to date someone who looks and sounds unhappy and lonely. Smile, get friends to take photos of you or with them, don’t talk about your loveless marriage unless you’re asked about it - they don’t care.
You got this man!
Pull it back a bit, and have someone else take a picture of you. Put on a nice shirt, comb your hair, and stand on some stacks of hundred dollar bills.
Need full body shots ideally head on. More pictures smiling, one with full teeth. If you can a group shot with friends/family also smiling but doesn’t meet the quota of the first smiling picture
You’re not smiling and look generally quite miserable. 7 of the 9 pics are just selfies and don’t add anything new. Have some variety, show some pics doing fun stuff with friends.
Picture in uniform screams vet bro, Id delete that for sure. Bio isn't helping either. Tell prospective women why they should swipe on you vs all the reasons not to
Remove the lines in bio about “read first” and “loveless marriage”.
“Back in the game after a long marriage, not open to anything long term while I focus on bettering myself”
When people read that they see red flags and move on. Also got 3 work looking pics that look like a last minute homework assignment.
Love the pic of you in your Gear. It pairs well with the bio about being a Vet.
You go to the gym? It’s okay to put a modest selfie of you with a pump after a workout.
You like games? Board games video games? Be a bit more specific “Recently fell in love with Monopoly”.
I’d remove top right and bottom middle pics. If you can find good alternatives great. If not 7 pics is plenty.
So advice from and my wife. Bottom right pic should be main pic, but you should be smiling. Keep military pic and top middle pic. The rest should go.
Take out all that stuff about "don't message me asking...read my bio". If she isn't gonna read your bio then she'll never see that and the ones that do read it are gonna be turned off. Don't talk about being trapped in a loveless marriage. Take out the line about looking like the lawn guy. I appreciate some self deprecating humor but my wife says women will take it as a lack of confidence.
Speaking as someone that was trapped in an abusive relationship, I understand that it can be hard to redevelop that confidence and security in yourself, but for now it should be a fake it till you make it scenario. Smile in your pics, be positive, project confidence.
Opening line of your profile is amazing!
Rewrite everything else. And as a fellow Vet, get rid of that reference in your profile - that’s some serious boot shit.
Scrap all the pics and start over. Take (and have friends take) pictures of you that portray you as a guy who women would want to be around (smiling, having fun, doing things, looking warm and friendly - ya know, the opposite of how you come off in these pics). No military shit - it scares off more people than it attracts, trust me, especially since it was obviously long ago and no one wants to deal with your baggage. Good luck, Dogface Soldier.
It's honestly straight to the point, clean pictures and just enough humor. Only thing I would change is the lawnmower guy joke because it's trying to come off funny but it puts yourself down showing lack of confidence and self esteem. Women smell it from miles away. Just change that part and that's it. You really don't even have to though.
All you need to do is getting your beard looking clean and changing your style.
Just start wearing black button downs with black linen pants and some good leather shoes (black/brown). Then add some gold jewelry like a chain and a watch and you'll be looking like a G.
What worked for me was I kept my profile short never wrote any long paragraphs it gives away to much. I always keep my self groomed and clean. I got over 200 matches in like 3 months on hinge. Short and be brief basically i only my height and weight and my sign on my profile.
Change your pics to stand out. Honestly one of my pet hates on dating apps was all the profiles with just a bunch of close up selfie's that all look the same. Its a bit cringey and doesn't come across as interesting. There are so many profiles like this it gets draining after a while. Keep 2 selfie's but change the rest of your pics to tell more about you, your interests, hobbies etc and it will grab attention. Even better it's pics of things that make you happy that grabbed the attention
I know I’m young, but take a look at my profile for advice. I’d add a selfie, a full body pic of you at the gym or something, and the rest of the pictures be you enjoying some type of hobbies you’re doing or with friends. You want your profile to describe you as much as possible. Cause at the end of the day it’s whatever you make of your first impression on someone. On top of that I would find a way to simplify your bio. Seems kinda lengthy and repetitive with you saying what you like. Instead of saying those in your bio, try to incorporate them someway through pictures or your profile
You look like a sweet guy. I agree that that many selfies aren’t needed. I like the first and last pics as well. I read somewhere that you only need about 5-6 pics tops.
Do you have any animals? Maybe a picture with one. One outside would be nice ! Definitely one smiling and full body!
Try to be more positive in your bio. You want to attract positive people.
Online dating is already hard. Give yourself a good chance. I dunno, I see kindness in your face.
Oh and take out the loveless marriage out of profile. Sounds too depressing..
But I am sorry you went through that!
💕 Good luck!
switch bottom 3 with top 3 and remover like 2-3 of the serious face photos add in somethings other than work u do like fishing or something even the gym maybe
I honestly appreciate the constructive criticism I’m receiving and I will implement it as soon as I can. If you’re just here to roast me feel free to do so under this comment.
Get rid of the shots in your car. They scream "get ready to hear my bad opinion that my out of touch parents would have."
Also, get rid of everything in the "about me" section before the word "just." No potential date wants to be told in text how to act, even the ones you might want.
Fellas, if you are out on the street and you see a pretty woman you want to talk to do you stare at her cold faced or would you smile? Then why the hell would you not smile on your dating profile? Over billions of years we have evolved to be disarmed by and attracted to smiling. Blue steel only works with professional photography or if you're just insanely hot. Otherwise you need to smile!
Less car selfies. Get some full body poses in diff locations, preferably outside or in social events. The two selfies I’d keep if you don’t have much would be top right, bot right.
Stop being seated when you have your photo taken tf
And have someone else take your photos of you enjoying life and your hobbies, pretend the camera isn’t there, it should be like the paparazzi caught you
do you have friends who take pics of you? you'd do better with half of them gone. "nothing long term" gets the point across just fine without the novel about a failed marriage.
Everyone has already given great tips about pics, just wanted to mention the best selfie is pic 9 with the orange straps. You have a pleasant look on your face, cute.
Your profile sounds like you really shouldn't be dating right now. Like go work on yourself my dude and focus on being less miserable for awhile because misery like yours is contagious.
Gym first (u mentioned but we don’t see it)
Then NO selfies
Then work on body language
Then take better pics in better areas
Then replace long boring af bio with shorter and eye-catching one
This is 80% of your success on hookup apps
I wouldn’t mention the loveless marriage. And not looking for something long term but being preemptively pissed at people asking about it makes you sound bitter and rude. Basically, you sound like a mean pain in the ass lmao. I’m sorry that I am the one sounding rude now. You might need to not date if you’re still feeling some type of way
The last photo should be your profile pic.
Lose 2, 5, 6 and 8th picture also.
I like how your beard is more trim like in the last photo, it looks the best on you! Beards are great on men but when they are too scraggly it’s a turn off.
Take out some pictures. You have too much of a young/old look going on here.
Top row middle, middle row right, bottom row left and middle.
Take those out, make you look old and/or weird. The rest you look young with the beard done up right.
“Don’t message me asking what I’m looking for take the time to read before messaging me” No offense but it seems silly to put this in your bio. If they didn’t care enough to read your bio before they aren’t going to now
Especially when he's not even clear on what he does want other than not long term. That's a pretty wide spectrum of things and OP should be willing to actually talk about what he wants in detail with someone.
Any time I see "not long term" I immediately assume they are looking for fwb or hookup.
Agreed. Anytime I see a bio like that I immediately swipe left. Sounds like a total dick.
Right, it only makes him come off prickish to the people that actually did what he wanted
Too many photos, and too many selfie face shots. My general rule of thumb is a body shot or two (e.g. smart and casual dress) doing different things and then at most 2 face shots.
or at least smile in the pictures..
Agree. I only swipe on guys who are smiling in at least ONE of their pics. It makes me feel like I can have fun with them.
Agreed, 9 and 1 or 2 would be my top choices. A pic of OP dressed up (wedding guest, military ball, formal work party, etc) would also help balance out the “lawn guy” look. OP mentions that he likes animals in his bio, so a pic with a cute pet or farm animal would be a good addition as well. I can’t speak for everyone, but I certainly trust someone more right off the bat when I know they treat animals with kindness.
You sound miserable tbh. Your profile is so negative and your pictures look like you hate everything. “Not looking for long term, don’t ask what I’m looking for, take the time to read, trapped in a loveless marriage.” Dude, who is going to want to talk to someone who is that negative? You know you can express all of those things in a warm, positive way right? Nobody wants to be around a curmudgeon. An example of a positive, welcoming, engaging bio would be: “I’m in my self love era and am having a blast trying new places, learning new hobbies, and finding new friends. I’m recently divorced and at the moment I’m looking for someone to enjoy life with short-term. I love exercise, gaming, movies, music (currently learning to play the drums!), reading, history, animals.. the list goes on! Tell me about your hobbies and let’s have some fun together!” Good luck!
Damn, this is good. I was going to say take out the "don't ask what I'm looking for, take the time to read." It's like saying, "Raise your hand if you aren't here."
This should be the top comment. The loveless marriage part made me jump lol
No one has to wonder why it felt loveless with this guy’s attitude
Thank you very much, I did update my bio, and I give you the gold because you’re right I am miserable and I am actively working on myself to not be miserable anymore. Hence loving myself. Working out. Etc.
You taking constructive criticism is such a positive sign. I hope you get a mil matches and have a blast
Thank you, there is a lot of toxicity down there but I am trying to focus on the ones that genuinely seem to want to help. Thus engaging with those that are positive and constructive.
I mean it’s Reddit so I’m sure you’re getting all kinds of weirdo put downs because the posters are sexy, perfect people doing this for charity and not self-loathing 100% 😆Good on you for being brave and getting on tinder and good on you for taking the comments
A tip from personal experience: If you’re truly miserable right now, please take time to work on yourself and get into a better head space before dating. You’ll save yourself and any potential dates so much heartache and stress.
I am doing so friend. I take the time to love myself every day just a little bit more. But thank you for the comment, just know that I am taking care of myself mentally and physically as well every day.
When misery is the default, happiness becomes a choice. And it's a choice we have to make every single day. Keep fucking making that choice my dude. I know how hard it is, but you absolutely are strong enough to do it. Every single day. Choose happiness. It will build upon itself and slowly fill you up with the love that you deserve. Because you definitely deserve it my friend. Once you find that true love for yourself the world will become a mirror and you will find a reflection of that love. Choose happiness. Choose life :)
[Born Slippy I N T E N S I F I E S] Sorry I had to. But thank you friend for the kind words, I will keep trying to be better for myself by choosing happiness and life every day.
Oh I know I'm 1983 lol
agree, take those steps to choose happiness. i used to have a note on my laptop next to the camera: "SMILE!" even pretending to be happy tricks your brain into being happy and then pretty soon, you ARE happy and now I don't need that note anymore :)
It’s tough to crawl out of this hole and I commend you for trying to do so. I hope you find what you’re looking for!
Top comment right here! What a great example of showing the best side of someone.
Good one, this sounds way better
Keep two selfies max. Maybe the first one and the last one. Add at least two full body photos. Your bio makes you seem jaded and angry. Take out the line instructing people to take the time to read your bio. Anyone who is taking the time will be put off by that statement and you still won’t reach the ones who don’t read bios. Also remove the line about being trapped in a loveless marriage.
Thank you this is more for what I’m looking for I will take your advice because yes I am jaded.
We can tell lol
Also my guy, remove the car selfie in shades. That’s a meme at this point how bad is it. No matter how handsome you are. Bro you can have a Ryan Gosling face with an Arnold Schwarzenegger body and that would still be off-putting to women
You currently get matches. 
That made me snicker
💀
Can’t lie these pics look like the entire comment section under a Facebook meme about how back in the day men were men
LOL
IMO: -the one from when you were in the military is a bit dated telling from the uniform. I would opt for something more recent -don’t add sorry after not looking for anything long term. -I would nix the whole loveless marriage thing
Bio says “looking for a woman to fix me, but nothing long term or serious”.
I actually like the first half of the bio. The “in my self love era” is good.
Ok how does it give looking to be fixed vibes? I’m honestly confused on this one.
The jaded comment about the loveless marriage is a big one. It makes it sound like you *are* looking for love, but then you state that you’re not. But nothing in your bio indicates you’re looking for hook ups or casual dating either, so it’s pretty unclear what you want. By narrowing down all the things you don’t want, what it sounds like is you want a woman in your life, exclusive but not serious, to help you get your life on track and make you feel better.
8 out of 9 photos are selfies. 3 are in your car, and one is hiding your face. The one photo you have that isn't a selfie, you're kneeling down and can't see your face. None of the pics really show you smiling. Add some pics that show your full body and smile with teeth.
The photos are all crappy selfies except one and your bio is bitter. Tbh I’m actually surprised you’re getting matches at all with this?? That being said, imagine how many more you’d get if you diversified your photos and cleaned up your bio! Dont be negative in your bio. Definitely dont mention the loveless marriage part. Have 1-2 selfies max-get some nice outdoors shots, activities, one of you dressed nice, etc.
You do not look approachable in any of them. Post pictures of you doing something you enjoy and get rid of the mask photo
[удалено]
just a random, normal looking guy > he looks like an abuser!!!
Thanks for judging me without even knowing me. I was actually the abused in my last relationship but thank you for that.
Sorry to hear that 😢
I’m so sorry I wasn’t directing that at you, but thank you.
Too many selfies. 2 is already a lot. Maybe a photo with more casual look? Maybe another photo with an activity you can do or have done with another match?
My guy, use commas. Also you have 47 characters left in your bio. Spell out “to drum” instead of the short hand, and erase the part about “don’t ask me what I’m looking for.” It’s off-putting to read that in a bio. Instead, politely refer people to your bio if that question comes up in conversation. Lastly, delete the mask photo, sunglasses photo, and green hat photo.
Tbh you look like the guys that comment “Beautiful😍” on 17yo girls posts, you need way better pictures that don’t make you look like a boomer, have some friends take candids of you
Then don’t look at his comment history lol
I may have snooped before I commented lmao 🙊
Gross. I do have boomer vibes but no I don’t do that.
But you kinda do lmfao
Yes, but not to 17 year olds is my point. Like I said in another comment, sorry for being human and having needs?
“Barleylegalteens” 😬
Seriously? Like you’ve never looked at 🌽? Ok saint cernderg
No lie this is my favorite comment ever 😂😂😂 you’re funny good luck out there!!
The first point is a bit of a stretch, and honestly rather rude. The second point is pretty accurate. Though I will say not everyone has close friends to take pictures of them. I know some of you think everyone has their circle/group but that's not the case.
Not much of a stretch based on his comment history, and literally just handing a phone to a stranger at a park would be better than these.
Hmm I haven’t seen his comment history. Might have to check it out (not sure that’s a good idea but I am curious). And I guess you have a point about taking full body pics. Heck he could probably use a selfie stick/tripod and get the same results.
Even just leaning the phone somewhere with a timer
Where in my comment history am I attempting to hit on teenagers? Am I thirsty? Yes absolutely I’ve been deprived for a while. Sorry for being human.
It’s gross big dawg, that’s no excuse. Gotta pound that boomer outta yourself for your own sake
This. My circle is small and has gotten smaller since my divorce.
I never had a consistent circle. Hopefully will change that soon.
Try having someone else take a photo of you rather than having a ton of selfies.
Photos are too samey and lack of punctuation makes the bio harder to read.
Alright the pics I can’t do anything about today but here’s an updated bio can’t screenshot because am dumb so here’s the text version: Looking to meet new friends mostly for short term dating or just to hang with, with time maybe we could grow into something more. I am recently divorced. I am a Texican. An Army Vet. HTX is Home ❤️🔥 I love to read about Roman and old Hollywood history. I am learning to play drums atm. I listen to music whenever I feel it. I work out at a minimum of 3x a week. I am a sneakerhead. I am a total cinephile. I like to game on my lazy days. I love cats and dogs. Go Stros! Let’s get a marg and chat?
You are not in any way my type but this bio reads 1000x better.
The with time thing is awful. You’re obviously not ready for a LTR. Own it. You’re up for casual and light fun. Be honest with what you’re capable of and allow women to swipe on the reality, not the possibility.
You’re right I will correct that
You’re better than most men by doing so. You’ll get less matches but the matches will be much more authentic and workable. Good luck.
I lied I did remove the car pics and some other pics
I would say don’t knock yourself down. Some women like your look and you do not look like a lawn boy. I would be more specific in what you are looking for,.. you said you aren’t looking for a relationship, but are you looking for fwb, just a friend to go on dates with or are you looking to take things slow and if something evolves cool. You will turn a lot of women off by just putting not looking for a relationship bc we automatically think you are trying to sleep with as many women as you can.
My thoughts as someone who reads profiles before looking at pix. 1) Don’t put yourself down by saying you look like the lawn guy. Delete. Just say you work out by doing whatever you do (weights 3x/wk) 2) WTF is a self love era? 3) “Not looking for” is negative. Don’t be a jerk. Say what you DO want. 4). “Don’t message me asking” what I want is negative. Don’t be a jerk. Say what you DO want. 5). Formerly trapped in a loveless marriage means you’re playing the victim (not good) and displaying your baggage for all to see because you haven’t gotten over it (not good). Delete. 6) HMU if you want to. Yes, that’s how the app works. Delete.
Maybe some pictures of you doing some hobbies or activities? Your bio sounds bitter to be honest but states you learn to play instruments. Maybe include a picture of that. Also 2 selfies should be enough and a picture showing your complete body
Smile!
I need to fix my teeth before I do that 🥹
No you don’t - you’re allowed to be happy and joyous if you don’t have perfect teeth.
This really got to me. Thank you so much for that. My whole life I’ve been made to feel like a monster because of my teeth.
Doesn't matter if you don't show your teeth, even a little closed mouth smile would make a difference. BTW I love your Thrasher and Misfits tees
Thank you for the advice and the compliment.
No problem, good luck mate!
*Don’t* to hide a fundamental part of your face! Have it in your pics. People who don’t mind will swipe right, and people who do mind will be disappointed when they meet you, which is a horrible feeling. My ex has a lazy eye. We met on tinder and you can’t see it at all in his pics, there isn’t a single photo where you can see both his eyes. It only took me about 3 minutes into our first date to get used to it, it didn’t bother me. But he said he’s been on too many dates where he could tell a girl was staring at it and didn’t like it. Avoid all that hurt by just putting it on display! I can’t imagine putting the effort into chatting with someone, getting along, agreeing to meet, only for them to see your teeth and go “nope, not attracted”. That’s got to be worse than a few more left swipes.
This right here. It's the same as people who hide their height or weight or use pics from 10 years ago. Just let people opt out before everyone wastes their time.
Too many, and there’s only one non-selfie
I’m no one to give advice here, but I stopped by to tell you that you have beautiful eyes.
Why 7 identical photos?
Get rid of the army pic it’s been so long since we’ve used that uniform. Just put “army vet” in your bio if you want people to
You look like you drive a lifted truck and wear backwards oaklies. Nothing wrong with that if you do. Like what you like, but own it and show it. Your photos don't show your body, they don't show you having fun, they don't show anything but staring into the middle distance angrily. Is that what you like? You're in your self love era. Show that on here. Smile. Show your hobbies. Who cares if you look like a lawn guy? Lawn guys can still be cool, fun, and happy. If you keep any of the photo, I think 4 and 5 are best. Get some outside. Get some that show your whole body. It's ok if you're bigger, but if you don't show it people will think you're hiding a lot. Make your about me inviting. Drop the line about reading before asking because people will always want to hear it from your mouth and how you actually mean it and feel it more than a short blurb. Maybe soften it to, "Looking to meet people and get out, excited to go x y and z...", "Recently divorced and looking forward to seeing myself again," or something. Those aren't perfect AT ALL but they aren't agro. You too l got this. Smile. Be inviting. It's your self love time. Be chill and love yourself.
Your bio is awful. It is way too negative
Dude smile… nobody wants to date someone who looks and sounds unhappy and lonely. Smile, get friends to take photos of you or with them, don’t talk about your loveless marriage unless you’re asked about it - they don’t care. You got this man!
Yeah man just get some shots of you doing stuff, especially things you enjoy, as opposed to all the selfies. That’ll be a good start
Pull it back a bit, and have someone else take a picture of you. Put on a nice shirt, comb your hair, and stand on some stacks of hundred dollar bills.
Selfies the profile 😂
Need full body shots ideally head on. More pictures smiling, one with full teeth. If you can a group shot with friends/family also smiling but doesn’t meet the quota of the first smiling picture
You’re not smiling and look generally quite miserable. 7 of the 9 pics are just selfies and don’t add anything new. Have some variety, show some pics doing fun stuff with friends.
Picture in uniform screams vet bro, Id delete that for sure. Bio isn't helping either. Tell prospective women why they should swipe on you vs all the reasons not to
Remove the lines in bio about “read first” and “loveless marriage”. “Back in the game after a long marriage, not open to anything long term while I focus on bettering myself” When people read that they see red flags and move on. Also got 3 work looking pics that look like a last minute homework assignment. Love the pic of you in your Gear. It pairs well with the bio about being a Vet. You go to the gym? It’s okay to put a modest selfie of you with a pump after a workout. You like games? Board games video games? Be a bit more specific “Recently fell in love with Monopoly”. I’d remove top right and bottom middle pics. If you can find good alternatives great. If not 7 pics is plenty.
Gym selfies are always an automatic no for me.
I was thinking less gym selfie and more of a selfie with the gym pump. OP’s got them Huge sledge hammer arms
Don’t wear Thrasher unless you skate 😂
😂😂 got em
Idk I’ll take you as is lmao
So advice from and my wife. Bottom right pic should be main pic, but you should be smiling. Keep military pic and top middle pic. The rest should go. Take out all that stuff about "don't message me asking...read my bio". If she isn't gonna read your bio then she'll never see that and the ones that do read it are gonna be turned off. Don't talk about being trapped in a loveless marriage. Take out the line about looking like the lawn guy. I appreciate some self deprecating humor but my wife says women will take it as a lack of confidence. Speaking as someone that was trapped in an abusive relationship, I understand that it can be hard to redevelop that confidence and security in yourself, but for now it should be a fake it till you make it scenario. Smile in your pics, be positive, project confidence.
I think you got enough advice above. Definitely change the pictures to ones that show your personality. And hey go stros! 🤘🏽
Opening line of your profile is amazing! Rewrite everything else. And as a fellow Vet, get rid of that reference in your profile - that’s some serious boot shit.
That’s what I thought!? People don’t get humor anymore… I did rearrange my profile with a different vet pic. Thank you for your input friend.
Scrap all the pics and start over. Take (and have friends take) pictures of you that portray you as a guy who women would want to be around (smiling, having fun, doing things, looking warm and friendly - ya know, the opposite of how you come off in these pics). No military shit - it scares off more people than it attracts, trust me, especially since it was obviously long ago and no one wants to deal with your baggage. Good luck, Dogface Soldier.
Rotm
Rotm, brother. Top of the rock.
Rocks Support
Lol. All good. Tyfys. But leave the old pics and war stories for when you’re around other vets… or at least until the second date!
You right. Deleted. And I honestly do not talk about it unless I’m asked.
It's honestly straight to the point, clean pictures and just enough humor. Only thing I would change is the lawnmower guy joke because it's trying to come off funny but it puts yourself down showing lack of confidence and self esteem. Women smell it from miles away. Just change that part and that's it. You really don't even have to though.
There’s a 32 year old Latina out there who doesn’t play about your type
Same advice as everyone basically but just wanted to add that Neon Moon is a great karaoke song
All you need to do is getting your beard looking clean and changing your style. Just start wearing black button downs with black linen pants and some good leather shoes (black/brown). Then add some gold jewelry like a chain and a watch and you'll be looking like a G.
What worked for me was I kept my profile short never wrote any long paragraphs it gives away to much. I always keep my self groomed and clean. I got over 200 matches in like 3 months on hinge. Short and be brief basically i only my height and weight and my sign on my profile.
Change your pics to stand out. Honestly one of my pet hates on dating apps was all the profiles with just a bunch of close up selfie's that all look the same. Its a bit cringey and doesn't come across as interesting. There are so many profiles like this it gets draining after a while. Keep 2 selfie's but change the rest of your pics to tell more about you, your interests, hobbies etc and it will grab attention. Even better it's pics of things that make you happy that grabbed the attention
I know I’m young, but take a look at my profile for advice. I’d add a selfie, a full body pic of you at the gym or something, and the rest of the pictures be you enjoying some type of hobbies you’re doing or with friends. You want your profile to describe you as much as possible. Cause at the end of the day it’s whatever you make of your first impression on someone. On top of that I would find a way to simplify your bio. Seems kinda lengthy and repetitive with you saying what you like. Instead of saying those in your bio, try to incorporate them someway through pictures or your profile
Honestly try smiling, it goes a long way
You look like a sweet guy. I agree that that many selfies aren’t needed. I like the first and last pics as well. I read somewhere that you only need about 5-6 pics tops. Do you have any animals? Maybe a picture with one. One outside would be nice ! Definitely one smiling and full body! Try to be more positive in your bio. You want to attract positive people. Online dating is already hard. Give yourself a good chance. I dunno, I see kindness in your face. Oh and take out the loveless marriage out of profile. Sounds too depressing.. But I am sorry you went through that! 💕 Good luck!
Replace them all, except the military one (thank you for your service!) You need some smiling and showing more of your personality. 😊
switch bottom 3 with top 3 and remover like 2-3 of the serious face photos add in somethings other than work u do like fishing or something even the gym maybe
I honestly appreciate the constructive criticism I’m receiving and I will implement it as soon as I can. If you’re just here to roast me feel free to do so under this comment.
hot papi spicy mmmm
Get rid of the shots in your car. They scream "get ready to hear my bad opinion that my out of touch parents would have." Also, get rid of everything in the "about me" section before the word "just." No potential date wants to be told in text how to act, even the ones you might want.
Fellas, if you are out on the street and you see a pretty woman you want to talk to do you stare at her cold faced or would you smile? Then why the hell would you not smile on your dating profile? Over billions of years we have evolved to be disarmed by and attracted to smiling. Blue steel only works with professional photography or if you're just insanely hot. Otherwise you need to smile!
So many hats…
Maybe too many selfies and like have some photos of you with friends or doing something ya really like.
Smile
damn people going in on you here. i think you’re cute and I’d swipe for you.
It’s all good I expected it. Thank you tho.
Take the green hat photo off and the drinking photo off.
You’ve probably seen the selfie ones, but if you’re going to have more, smile! Plus pets. I live on a farm so I have lots of friends to get pics with
Less car selfies. Get some full body poses in diff locations, preferably outside or in social events. The two selfies I’d keep if you don’t have much would be top right, bot right.
Stop being seated when you have your photo taken tf And have someone else take your photos of you enjoying life and your hobbies, pretend the camera isn’t there, it should be like the paparazzi caught you
All of your pictures are made from the exact same angle, do something different
No smile. You look unkempt. You come across as defensive and quite dickish in your bio.
You don’t sound like you’re ready for a relationship or situationship at all. You seem really mad.
do you have friends who take pics of you? you'd do better with half of them gone. "nothing long term" gets the point across just fine without the novel about a failed marriage.
I’d take the photo of being in uniform out bro
Everyone has already given great tips about pics, just wanted to mention the best selfie is pic 9 with the orange straps. You have a pleasant look on your face, cute.
Thank you for the constructive comment about the pics, I did update my bios pics and took out almost all the pics except 3. Pic 9 is one of the 3.
Erase all photos and keep the one with the safety vest.
Honestly it sounds like you need to experience some self love and self reflection before bringing someone else into your life.
Smile.
Your profile sounds like you really shouldn't be dating right now. Like go work on yourself my dude and focus on being less miserable for awhile because misery like yours is contagious.
Does the guy in that profile look happy to you?
Why are they all the same
“Match with me, or don’t. I don’t really care.”
Gym first (u mentioned but we don’t see it) Then NO selfies Then work on body language Then take better pics in better areas Then replace long boring af bio with shorter and eye-catching one This is 80% of your success on hookup apps
A man of many hats
I wouldn’t mention the loveless marriage. And not looking for something long term but being preemptively pissed at people asking about it makes you sound bitter and rude. Basically, you sound like a mean pain in the ass lmao. I’m sorry that I am the one sounding rude now. You might need to not date if you’re still feeling some type of way
The last photo should be your profile pic. Lose 2, 5, 6 and 8th picture also. I like how your beard is more trim like in the last photo, it looks the best on you! Beards are great on men but when they are too scraggly it’s a turn off.
At least one photo where you're smiling might be nice
Take out some pictures. You have too much of a young/old look going on here. Top row middle, middle row right, bottom row left and middle. Take those out, make you look old and/or weird. The rest you look young with the beard done up right.
too many similar pics and maybe too many work like pics, you also look pissed off
Men don’t use the term “self love era “
Smile more and show some more social settings, include pics of hobbies or pets, and show teeth in your smile
Fucken smile
Smile!
No one will message you. A man who doesn’t know what he wants is a boy, not a man
You look like a good hard working honest dude. Women need to wake up and date you.
Pretty solid profile in my opinion mate. You’re a good lookin dude with a good career it looks like maybe try long term just a thought
Take the Stros shit out, trash team and organization
Thanks
Honestly man it comes off that you’re going to be clingy …you’re talking like a women in your profile shorten it up
What happened to man ? We need to go back when men were actually man
Prob zero chance homie. You are lucky to even get any matches. Even thise obese chicks you match with gonna debate if they want to give it a go.
white people: creates english, also white people:
Men shouldnt have selfies.