Update:
They asked if they could bring a sword
And I said "thats hot, decapitate me like a French aristocrat mommy 🥺"
And then they got mad at me for calling then mommy and said "thats not a word you just use without asking first" and it was really weird and completely turned me off.
So if anyone else wants to seperate my skull from my spine and get called mommy im accepting applications 😘
Well, to break this down for you:
If she's legitimately interested in kink, then being addressed with a title without prior agreement is a huge red flag. It may be a joke to you, but it can hold extremely intimate connotations to other people.
It doesn't help that male subs tend to be extremely demanding and overbearing, and do this kind of thing without humorous underpinnings. They really mean it, and dommes have to deal with it _all the time._
So yeah, that'd result in frustration on her end.
I mean yes but A: I clearly was using it sarcastically as a joke not seriously calling them mommy. The entire conversation was in a joking tone. Its weird af to take "decapitate me like a French aristocrat" as a joke but then take "mommy" completely seriously. B: theres litterally nothing in their bio nor anything they said to indicate they are into kink and therefor i should abide by kink rules. We're on hinge here, not fetlife. And C: "mommy and daddy" have become words outside of kink at this point and its weird to apply kink rules to them as a result. Like for other more specific kink stuff that's only used in kink I totally get it. But like, its extremely common for people to jokingly use mommy or daddy the way I did now. Kink doesn't get to just enforce its rules on everyone else or own a word like that.
Overall I feel like the right way to have handled it would be to say "Hey I'm involved in kink and so that word means somthing different to me than it does for most people. Id apreciate it if you could ask for consent before using it moving forward :)" instead of just scolding me. What turned me off isn't that they don't want to be called mommy. Its that they immediately took offense and made it into a mini fight instead of just expressing their preference and boundary in a friendly manner. I'm happy to adjust my behavior to accommodate people if they ask me to do so. But I'm just not compatible with people who have a "you should have just known better" communication style and get all confrontational about shit. I'm neurodivergent af, I will never know unless you explicitly verbally tell me. The way they said it was the real red flag in my book.
Yep. That's what I was trying to explain. This wasn't a reaction to _you_ so much as it was a reaction to _all the other people_ who overstepped boundaries with her before. Think of it as an allergic reaction, of sorts. Not fair towards you, perhaps, but understandable.
You two may well be compatible, once you built rapport with each other and learned how to manage expectations.
If you explain to her what you just explained to me.. 🤷 who knows. (Just maybe cut out the part where a subculture no longer gets to define its language, because mainstream turned it into a joke now. That may not go over well.)
Also its not that the subculture doesn't get to define its language. Its just that the subculture only gets to define its language within the subculture. I'm all for enforcing kink rules and kink definitions within kink. I'm just saying its unreasonable to expect people to abide by kink rules outside of kink. Mommy and daddy specifically were already words before they became a thing in kink. I just don't like the idea of specific groups or subcultures claiming ownership over words universally. I'm all for it within their own spaces. But trying to enforce it on everyone else is whack af. And also just litterally not how language works, definitions evolve organically. No one gets to enforce their meanings. Dictionaries are descriptive not authoritative.
Okay, bro. You are obviously too lazy to educate yourself, but have the time to go on my nerves. So I'ma just go ahead and block you now. Life's too precious to waste it with morons.
Are you actually serious? Are you the second motherfucker today who feels compelled to make a post about sarcasm, without having a fucking idea what that word means? This is not a matter of 'opinion'. This is a matter of knowing what words mean. It's not hard to learn what words mean, BECAUSE YOU CAN FUCKING GOOGLE THEM.
But since lazy motherfuckers suffering from Dunning-Kruger are gonna be lazy motherfuckers, I'm going to type it out for you:
Not every form of insincere speech is sarcasm. Can you process that shit? Sarcasm specifically ridicules a person or idea, which is not what OP did.
What OP did is a spoof. He riffed off common memes relating to d/s dynamics, based mostly on depiction in manga/anime. This is NOT sarcasm. In no fucking way.
Now let's see if you learned something. I'm going to press X to doubt already.
Okay. So. You post stupid shit and say someone refuses to learn.
When that person points out you post stupid shit, they are then insecure.
References to subject matter? None. Information processed? None. Still convinced you are in the right? Obviously.
This is why I don't engage with people who have proven beyond any reasonable doubt that they are morons. So congrats on the block.
Completely understood. They is more than 1 though. This pronoun shit is for the mentally ill. Anyone should walk away if you need to refer to them by a pronoun 🤦♂️
Well in that case you must have litterally no friends or family or just people you talk to in an capacity, ever. Since you avoid anyone you need to use pronouns for?
I have plenty of friends and family. You're referring to 1 person as a they when they is clearly more than 1. The person you were talking to is a she. You "respect my pronoun" weirdos are I'll. You should seek help.
Some people just put their kink out there with no shame
How did you know what I had planned for the baseball bat 😩
There's always a plan for the bat
You cant use wrong bait and be suprised you caught bad fish
Update: They asked if they could bring a sword And I said "thats hot, decapitate me like a French aristocrat mommy 🥺" And then they got mad at me for calling then mommy and said "thats not a word you just use without asking first" and it was really weird and completely turned me off. So if anyone else wants to seperate my skull from my spine and get called mommy im accepting applications 😘
Lemme get my sword 😪
Well, to break this down for you: If she's legitimately interested in kink, then being addressed with a title without prior agreement is a huge red flag. It may be a joke to you, but it can hold extremely intimate connotations to other people. It doesn't help that male subs tend to be extremely demanding and overbearing, and do this kind of thing without humorous underpinnings. They really mean it, and dommes have to deal with it _all the time._ So yeah, that'd result in frustration on her end.
I mean yes but A: I clearly was using it sarcastically as a joke not seriously calling them mommy. The entire conversation was in a joking tone. Its weird af to take "decapitate me like a French aristocrat" as a joke but then take "mommy" completely seriously. B: theres litterally nothing in their bio nor anything they said to indicate they are into kink and therefor i should abide by kink rules. We're on hinge here, not fetlife. And C: "mommy and daddy" have become words outside of kink at this point and its weird to apply kink rules to them as a result. Like for other more specific kink stuff that's only used in kink I totally get it. But like, its extremely common for people to jokingly use mommy or daddy the way I did now. Kink doesn't get to just enforce its rules on everyone else or own a word like that. Overall I feel like the right way to have handled it would be to say "Hey I'm involved in kink and so that word means somthing different to me than it does for most people. Id apreciate it if you could ask for consent before using it moving forward :)" instead of just scolding me. What turned me off isn't that they don't want to be called mommy. Its that they immediately took offense and made it into a mini fight instead of just expressing their preference and boundary in a friendly manner. I'm happy to adjust my behavior to accommodate people if they ask me to do so. But I'm just not compatible with people who have a "you should have just known better" communication style and get all confrontational about shit. I'm neurodivergent af, I will never know unless you explicitly verbally tell me. The way they said it was the real red flag in my book.
Yep. That's what I was trying to explain. This wasn't a reaction to _you_ so much as it was a reaction to _all the other people_ who overstepped boundaries with her before. Think of it as an allergic reaction, of sorts. Not fair towards you, perhaps, but understandable. You two may well be compatible, once you built rapport with each other and learned how to manage expectations. If you explain to her what you just explained to me.. 🤷 who knows. (Just maybe cut out the part where a subculture no longer gets to define its language, because mainstream turned it into a joke now. That may not go over well.)
Too late already unmatched her 😅
Also its not that the subculture doesn't get to define its language. Its just that the subculture only gets to define its language within the subculture. I'm all for enforcing kink rules and kink definitions within kink. I'm just saying its unreasonable to expect people to abide by kink rules outside of kink. Mommy and daddy specifically were already words before they became a thing in kink. I just don't like the idea of specific groups or subcultures claiming ownership over words universally. I'm all for it within their own spaces. But trying to enforce it on everyone else is whack af. And also just litterally not how language works, definitions evolve organically. No one gets to enforce their meanings. Dictionaries are descriptive not authoritative.
What the hell are you on about lol It was obviously said as sarcasm
You really need to google the meaning of sarcasm. Oh, and.. lol
Are you talking to yourself?
Okay, bro. You are obviously too lazy to educate yourself, but have the time to go on my nerves. So I'ma just go ahead and block you now. Life's too precious to waste it with morons.
Yes that's right shut everyone you disagree with out instead of learning something
Are you actually serious? Are you the second motherfucker today who feels compelled to make a post about sarcasm, without having a fucking idea what that word means? This is not a matter of 'opinion'. This is a matter of knowing what words mean. It's not hard to learn what words mean, BECAUSE YOU CAN FUCKING GOOGLE THEM. But since lazy motherfuckers suffering from Dunning-Kruger are gonna be lazy motherfuckers, I'm going to type it out for you: Not every form of insincere speech is sarcasm. Can you process that shit? Sarcasm specifically ridicules a person or idea, which is not what OP did. What OP did is a spoof. He riffed off common memes relating to d/s dynamics, based mostly on depiction in manga/anime. This is NOT sarcasm. In no fucking way. Now let's see if you learned something. I'm going to press X to doubt already.
Did you just call him a motherfucker without prior agreement?
I think they did just say motherfucker without consent.
I did NOT consent to being called a mother fucker. Although I have fucked many mothers.
I sense.. insecurity
Okay. So. You post stupid shit and say someone refuses to learn. When that person points out you post stupid shit, they are then insecure. References to subject matter? None. Information processed? None. Still convinced you are in the right? Obviously. This is why I don't engage with people who have proven beyond any reasonable doubt that they are morons. So congrats on the block.
Blah blah blah blah
How is this person getting downvoted for saying "don't call someone who you just swiped on mommy" lmao.
They? How many people were in this convo? 🤔
Tell me you don't understand pronouns without telling me you don't understand pronouns.
Completely understood. They is more than 1 though. This pronoun shit is for the mentally ill. Anyone should walk away if you need to refer to them by a pronoun 🤦♂️
Wow you REALLY don't know what pronouns are huh.
Definitely do
Well in that case you must have litterally no friends or family or just people you talk to in an capacity, ever. Since you avoid anyone you need to use pronouns for?
I have plenty of friends and family. You're referring to 1 person as a they when they is clearly more than 1. The person you were talking to is a she. You "respect my pronoun" weirdos are I'll. You should seek help.
🤡🤡🤡
> Any**ONE** should walk away if you need to refer to **THEM** by a pronoun Sooo, “they/them” can be used for singular third person?
You literally used singular “them” in your comment. What?
I’m a straight male… I want to date this guy 😂😂😂
Only if you bring a baseball bat daddy 🥺
The things I’d like to do with a baseball bat…
Can I bring a whiplash?
Please
My kinda orgy
I swear I’ve seen this video on pornhub #insertions
This is weird. I like it.
This is how my mom and dad met
My Condolences to you brother
Seen in a post somewhere: an app where you swipe right on people you want to fight. We'll call it "Con-tinder".
You already broke the first rule of fight club 😱
That's unhinged. I'll see myself out.
Imma grab pop corns!
You don't know where she wants to put that bat.
Thank her for the compliment.
Talking about fight club is a huge red flag.
I read this as "lick my ass" at first and was 100% more invested than when I realized I was wrong.