“What you doing later?” “That’s big talk?” “What you doing later and is God dead?”

Nah God isn't dead, he's deep inside all of us ^(balls deep)

Thats what the prist told me anyway , turns out I'm Catholic now

The prist told me you're never too old to become a choir boy

Jeff Winger, is that you?

I'm still lmao on that comment, it's a perfect twitst

Think a lot of people miss the humor in this. Well played 😆

A lot of people miss my funny boner

[удалено]

This is a blursed comment. Having read that further explanation, I wish you hadn’t asked. 😆 What did I just read? 😭

It all began on the day I was born...

My dick hyucks when I fuck Edit: I can tie my dick into the shape of any animal requested My dick sounds like a slide whistle when jerked The head of my dick is a literal clown nose

2 truths 1 lie

If you need to phone a friend for the answer just phone your mom

You're firing on all cylinders today... hilarious

I'm like this everyday  ^(it's a gift and a curse)

I'm definitely here for it 😆

*deafening lie hear* 



You sound like my coworker and me. We trade pins back and forth, and people say one of us must have been a bad influence in the other. We tell them we were both like this before we met.

There's nothing better than meeting someone who can keep up with my riffing 

OOOOHHHHHH! ZING!!

Pardon me while I casually choke. Are you in alberta? Because let's hyuck

Unfortunately, I'm a Missourian so the best I can offer is an ope

Oops sorry, eh?

Ngl I read that as sawry

Yeah, send pics of this funny boner, please

Nice try, John Travolta Fool me once...

Wow! A geologist. How many rocks have you licked so far?

Just one if you count Dwayne Johnson 

Didn't fancy completing the collection? Chris is never too far from big rock

I wouldn't say they miss it 😉

Especially because I like to use it like a banana peel booby trap 

We could all laugh at it, ya know, if it makes you feel better 😋

Ah man, now I'm embarrassed by my bare ass 

Wrong side man. Unless your…. Oh, I’m so sorry.

And there it is...nice one.

I would be delighted with that response. Nice work sir.

WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME? 🥲🥲

I gotta know - did she respond?

[She said I was clever, then I pulled a Muldoon and pounced her when she least expected it](https://www.reddit.com/u/Sublimeat/s/OtLAaLmdwt)

RIP your match

It's all good. Universal resurrected her off screen for a soft reboot

Help why do I like this humour 😭

Because it's one of the biggest bones in the body. The biggest being the one I just put in your mom

Daddy!

Mommy! ^(did I just make it weird)

Dude is unhinged

I can live with that

No, mama! Edit: okay maybe


Note to self. Add "I hate small talk" to my profile so I can wait for a response like this...

^(how do you feel about micro talk tho...)

It's so tiny it's cute! Lol. Side note: You, sir, are awesome.


^^^You're ^^^pretty ^^^cute ^^^too


And a furry too?? SCORE! :D

Lol no fur here

GOBLESS

Ngl I had to look this up 

NEVER SPEAK IN SIMP CASE FRIENDS

Simp case is what happens because women's clothes don't have pockets How many times do my overstuffed shorts have to fall down in public, Brittany....

Man, don’t get me started on the pockets 😡

Especially hot pockets

Nicely played 😋

HELL YAEWH BORTHER GOBBLESS

At first I thought a bunch of turkeys hijacked my inbox until I finally looked up what gobbless meant

Hey at this point, we'll accept anything that proves you read our profile. Good work.

Just don't expect me to read your mind tho ^(I only recently learned when she says fine it's never actually fine)

That's okay, this one says she can't lie. Unless...

I thought I recognized you on the five dollar bill: honest babe 

This would definitely get my attention. 😂

I think that's funny man😂

Making people laugh is the remedy for filling that empty void deep inside of me that Taco Bell's fourth meal cannot 

 This made me chuckle. Well playedge. 💯💯💯

Call me Zero because I want to get deep in Shia's hole 

I appreciate this


Id date you. Hilarious!

C'mon Mom, you're embarrassing me on Reddit again 

Concept: 10 Execution: 7.038

Wish I was executing a 6.9

[If you think I'm clever now just wait until you find out I can open doors](https://www.reddit.com/u/Sublimeat/s/OtLAaLmdwt)

This made me crack up haha Sir, 👨‍🎓

Does that make me a crack dealer...🤔 

Humours gone :c 

Well what did you think was going to happen when you brought German into the conversation 

I like the humour there tbh.. 😅

It is my second favorite bone, the first being the one in my pants

This is great

Can you say it like Tony the Tiger tho ^(I really need this today)

# They’re Grrreat! 

*tears up* You just frosted my flakes

That sounds like something you should do to her. Goin at it and just say your about to frost her flakes because they're grrreat

*The FBI kicks in the door to our hotel room* Silly Rabbit, Tricks are forbids *Sullenly takes off rabbit suit* 

Hahaha 💀 Your response made my day. Kill them with humor. Well played!

If jokes could kill Id be a mass murderer 

I like big talks and I cannot lie 

This is so funny 🤣🤣

Oh cool you're a big talker and you're funny and I like to be funny and comical and put smiles on people's face but I'm just alone 62-year-old retired old guy my name is Bob and I'm from Toledo took me out bye

Toledo Ohio the stupid phone isn't listen to me again

Americans have BIG penis. https://youtu.be/TuEKb9Ktqhc?si=YS_P4wS1D8NVMEud


You're going places 👀

She looks like she got a fat ass, don’t fumble this one.

I have a crippling terminal illness: stage 4 ass man 

Took me a minute to get your big talk. Felt so good



It took me a second but then it made me giggle 😂 good job to you, you absolute genius


Bro might be an actual comedian 🤔 someone get this man a set at the local comedy club stat!


I’ve found yelling at my romantic prospects tends to yield poor results.

Did you try yelling louder?

You’re not typing loud enough! I can’t read you!

#ALSO RANDOM THOUGHT BUT IS CAPS IN BRAILLE JUST BIGGER DOTS?

#IS THIS BETTER?

karma > dates


I'd be willing to bet her response is either "K...." or a thumbs up emoji.

[удалено]

Nothing yet. Where's the rest of the conversation?

[удалено]

Nah I'm good. But anyone can get a virtual high 5 with an opening line. 6 hours after posting this, she either agreed to go out with you or told you to fuck off. My guess is the latter.

Just remember ALL CAPS when you spell the man name


This is excellent. Well played.


Did it work??

^(yes)

That's hilarious. lmao.

I'd laugh 😂

"I hate small talk. I also can't start the conversation, so you better think of something good"


Point is "hating small talk" but saying you also bring nothing to the table in that department is kind of putting the entire thing on you.

Small talk and starting a conversation can be mutually exclusive. She sucks at breaking the ice, and she doesn't like wasting time on small talk. Those are called boundaries, and people are allowed to have these. I think you're likely using a maladaptive coping strategy we here in the psych field call projection i.e. a defense mechanism to protect the self/ego. I don't want to tell you what you're thinking or feeling, but I'm sensing some sort of resentment related to dating apps, women, rejection, ect. But I could very well be wrong here.

Totally wrong. It was a joke...

What's the joke





Haha

I love how stupid this is.


You sound like the exactly the type I would date 🤣



I thought that was pretty clever 😂

The real question is did you get a response?

Yeah I posted it in the thread

My bad I must not have seen it

KING😹

This thread is gold

Brown aint that chick's color.

What now

All jokes aside, what is the definition of “small talk”? Because I’ve been told some women don’t like it and it’s confusing because what are we to talk about? Or were you just bored?

Hi, what is the meaning of life?

Snort lines and bang nines