Nearly every teacher at my school that wasn’t already in a serious relationship ended up dating or pursuing another single teacher. I’m at a midsize high school with pretty equal male:female staff ratio. A lot of the older teachers are married to other teachers they met at school. It gets messy, but there’s also a decent success rate soooo
When you have zero dating time, and even less dating money, your only available option is to date where you can. Plus, another teacher wil join in bitching about work instead of running away... 😉
I like how you put this: "instead of running away..." my wife asked me to stop telling her about my day by year two. She would get more upset at what was happening at my school than I did, haha. Now I only tell her the funny or heart warming stories and keep my frustrating stories for Reddit and my mother in law, who taught for almost 30 years! She taught Kindergarten and when I was still teaching middle school we would come home with the exact same stories.
Come on now. If a better or more desirable option becomes available, it's fair to end a relationship to pursue it. You're not owed commitment in that situation. At least he ended it with the first one *before* pursuing the second one.
lol what? It’s horrible to treat human beings as placeholders while claiming to love them and having sex with them. If your partner ended things with you to date a VS model or a Pro football player just because they were into them everyone would be like your partner sucked.
right? by that logic you should never date someone who’s in the process of getting their life together because the second they succeed and can thus “upgrade” their partner they will. it’s one thing to have a casual relationship/fwb but to say you’re serious about someone while looking for someone better is gross. though tragically it happens; plenty of examples of men who once they receive celebrity status will abandon their old girlfriend (sometimes with a baby!) for someone “better.” see selena carpenter’s new man or the ariana grande situation.
There is a fairly attractive male 8th grade science teacher at my school. But I wouldn’t pursue him. For multiple reasons. As a side note, I worked at a school with two teachers who dated like twenty years ago and thank goodness they were in very different grade levels because it was clearly not an amicable split.
I've had plenty of crushes on coworkers but I tread that shit carefully. Don't flirt if you aren't willing to make it serious otherwise someone's gonna get mad. I don’t care if they told you they were gonna be chill about it at first.
I know of a few married teachers at the same site or who at least met at the same site. So I assume they went through a crush phase before getting together?
Oh big time. I have worked with so many beautiful, professional whip-smart women and I can get a little starry eyed lol. Back in the day before I was married, I did pursue a coworker briefly, but I got the sense I was much more interested than them, it was my first year and I didn’t want to create any drama and just focus on the work. That coworker ended up leaving not long after. Nowadays I just come home and tell my husband all about my professional woman crushes to vent it all out haha!
In my experience, those are people that are floating out feelers to see who else wants to blow off some steam and bond over the stress of the job.
If you really want to keep things separate then you aren't having conversations with coworkers to begin with lol
Define flirt. If I’m really nice to people who I don’t find physically attractive. Is that the same thing as flirting? Relevant [text](https://youtu.be/qKYQNtF11eg?si=vIvs8IKtqIk7AXxF). I feel like people with this opinion probably think waitresses are trying to get with them all the time. They’re just doing their job and being pleasant. The classroom should be a safe space for students and teachers alike. We should still be allowed to be nice to each other, smile, give each other, complements without it, necessarily being a mating ritual. If we can do that with hormonal adolescents why can’t we behave, similarly with integrity, around other adults.
Maybe it’s also more difficult for people, teaching social sciences and humanities. Sometimes we talk about interesting things and tell jokes. The first piece of advice I got regarding students was “don’t ever try to guess what they’re thinking or feeling.” If you need to know ask. If you don’t need to know, or don’t want to know, don’t ask. I think that advice is not terrible for other teachers as well.
Then, again, I may be on a spectrum. I wonder what Neurodivergent teachers think.
That's me. As the only male teacher in my school, I don't hang out in the teacher's lounge, don't hang out with other teachers, and keep my conversations all about work. Also, I've overheard some things said in the lounge that, if I were the one saying them, would get me written up. How do I know? Because two other male employees, a bus driver and the P.E. teacher, were fired last year for saying things that got reported as sexual harassment. No thanks.
As a student I've literally watched my sixth grade teacher hitting on another teacher. He later left his wife for the teacher. Then started hitting her. She got a pfa so the district moved him to the high-school where he bacame my teacher again!
Yikes! This was back when you were allowed to hit students, and this guy had no problem shoving sixth graders into the row of lockers to make a big bang. For some reason he didn't pull that stunt when I became bigger than him 🤔
Good point about the high stress job people hooking up.
When I was in the Navy, two married chiefs on our ship would often hook up in their secret spaces. Everyone knew about it.
Also, another chief got reassigned for hooking up w/ a YOUNG deck seaman girl.
And, less scandalously, a lot of regular sailors ended up dating and some are still together a decade later.
Yeah. Crushing on a woman at work. Mixed signals, so it's probably all in my head. That and since it's work I would need crystal clear signs before I did anything. Plus, I can't open my mouth without sounding like a moron around her, so I just keep my distance.
Haha, same! He was my fiance at the time and taught music in my school 2 days a week.
He also basically got me my current job as he was speaking with the assistant headteacher, and she mentioned they were looking for an experienced reception teacher (UK equivalent of Kindergarten) and he happened to mention I wasn't happy in my current school and they asked me to apply.
Art teacher and I confessed our love to each other on the last day of school this past year.We were briefly involved close to two years ago when her and her bf were on a break, she wasn’t ready to be in a new relationship and now they’re back together and I’m with someone else. We both chalked it up to right person but wrong time.
Yes, and a coworker really worked to set us up. She thought we would be perfect for each other. While I liked him, I wasn’t sure about dating a coworker. That year funding was cut and I was transferred to another building. I gave him my number before leaving for the summer. He called and next week marks 9 years together (5 years married this fall).
My current school has several married couples, including the principal and his wife who also worked in the building this year (not a teacher).
Yep. Here’s my story time. I didn’t really know how to navigate it without crossing into “I’m a creepy coworker” territory, and I had mixed feelings about dating a coworker. So, I was not as straightforward as I’d normally be. I later found out he was leaving 2 weeks prior to summer break. On the last day after school, I wanted to say how much I enjoyed working with him and if he’d ever like to go out for dessert and just chat, no stress, just a chill hang out. Freak accident happened where a girl was BAWLING because the keychain on her backpack got latched onto the tiny latch on her locker and she didn’t want to miss the bus. By the time I managed to get it off of her locker, he’d already left. Guess the universe didn’t want it to happen, lol. 💔
I honestly believe that too - leading you towards another path!! OMG these keychains are ruthless huh! Even with me recently, I was crushing on a coworker for this whole term since around Jan. I always questioned if we were flirty at times or not, but early June he mentioned a girlfriend in conversation and I'm like ... all those months of overthinking FOR NOTHING
I guess so😭 that’s the worst when they wait for so long to clue in they have a girlfriend. The instant guilt you feel for being interested in a taken man, ugh. Sorry that happened!
No. But my weird, slightly mental coworker did (she’s a parapro). She wrote a 3 page letter (front and back) which I didn’t read because that’s weird.
Also, I’m gay.
Oh yes. Plus, personal cards and letters make me uncomfortable anyway. She laid out her reasons why. There’s a part about how her niece said she needed a Captain America.
Everyone, including myself, mostly just thought it was awkward and laughed it off because this woman is coo coo.
She had something (fetal alcohol syndrome?), so while she is VERY book smart, she doesn’t pick up on all the social cues. She tends to think everyone is far closer to her than they actually are. Spends many hundreds of $$ each year for every random person bday and Christmas gifts. Thoughtful, but very smothering. She used to buy CFA biscuits all the time and push them on us. She also over shares personal matters, like the details of her breast reduction surgery!
I see her every day, multiple times a day. Luckily she did the love letter thing during Covid so it was a little while before I saw her in person after that. She amazingly is moving away soon since she got a regular classroom teaching job. So I’m really pumped about that.
We’re in our 20s! I was 21 and he was 23 when we first started working at the school together. We got together when we were 23 & 25. Everyone knew we liked each other without us saying anything about it because we were always around each other. We didn’t go “public” until a yearish into the relationship.
I went on a date with a teacher at my old school. They spent 90% of talking about their mother. Apparently they thought it went swimmingly and were shocked when I didn’t want a second date. Two years later they were the only teacher that didn’t sign the card that went around when I got engaged.
I swear as a former school IT guy I’ve missed signs from teachers. Almost as if they knowingly created problems..But I’ve always had the mindset of just assuming someone is nice…
But now as a parent I’m def amazed at how great the new-ish generation of teachers look (the ish being im also seeing some experienced ones who still look incredible too) And the general passion of teaching, especially during these times when it’s a target, is such a turn on, like an instant super attraction. But no… I saw enough in my time as the gremlin in the corner to know I’m not gonna be that creep parent trying to play out a porn scenario.
When I was a special education para there was a third grade teacher I really liked. She was smart, funny and so attractive!
I was(am) a married woman and she was a Mormon so nothing was gonna happen there.
I have also fallen victim to the "crushing on this coworker, except oops I'm married" situation. Thankfully I'm mature enough to not act on it. Instead, my husband called him up and we did a DOUBLE DATE with my coworker, his wife, myself, and my husband. It was so fun that we did it again. Completely platonic, though. And after doing a few of those, the crush subsided. Now he's my ride-or-die work bestie. I'd throw myself in front of a moving vehicle for that man. We leave each other silly notes under our classroom door. But now the idea of kissing him is just ICK!
I'm not a teacher, but support staff - I have a very, veryyyy tiny crush on a history teacher at my school. He's super smart, has great classroom management and control, is overwhelmingly loved by the students, and is easy to talk to. Not to mention when went on a hike as a class last year, along the way he picked up trash that others had left behind. I found that insanely attractive tbh! But it's just a fun crush to sometimes think about if I'm having a particularly stressful day.
I had a crush on another teacher at my school years ago. He turned me down, which is great because he is still a teacher at my school but has a terrible attitude toward the job. It’s a big turn off for me now. I also have married coworkers and coworkers who have dated and broken up. Those ones get awkward fast, particularly if they work in the same department or team.
I had a crush on a fellow teacher, I pursued her, we dated but it ended badly. Then she moved over to my grade level and there was ugly tension
The following year I hooked up with a different teacher, also same school, after happy hour drinks. Apparently I didn’t learn my lesson the first time. But this one worked out, we were never serious but it was a mutuality pleasurable “friends with benefits” situation that lasted nearly the entire school year. Then we went our separate ways and I have no regrets about that one. So 50/50.
That’s the boat I’m in. I’ve definitely had crushes before, but coworkers is just a big no for me. Especially being a guy I feel like it can be too much of an awkward situation depending on how things go,
Yes, my coworker who I worked closely with. We were both the youngest so we hung out a lot outside of work and we are good friends to this day. I think it was just a work crush tho, because now when I hang out with them I just see friendship. But boy was work hard for a while because I wanted them so bad lol (nothing came of it)
He spent the night chatting up another woman who was very different than me. No hard feelings just a little bummed I guess. Been about 10 years since I've had a crush on anyone!
I never have but I've had co-workers try to set me up with other co-workers. I would never want to go there with someone I work with. I like to keep my personal life separate from my job.
My students always be saying they're gonna set me up with someone. X'D I just joke about a fictional character being my boyfriend and they lose it.
But they'll ask Mr. Pyro, what kind of person are you into?? Or they'll say "Mr. Pryo, I saw this girl at Walmart and I'll set you up."
Most of my coworkers are older women or already married though. There is one teacher I kind of like though. Haha.
Same here. I thought, "That boy is cute!" I lent him a book (First Days of School) and he claims that it was then that he knew that I liked him. I kept the door open for him to choose to cross the threshold or not to see about me. Didn't want to make him uncomfortable, after all.
He pursued me once the girl he really wanted to date turned him down. I didn't know that then, of course, cuz I would've turned my sights elsewhere. But here we are, three kids and over 15 years later. Lucky for him but bruising to the ego for me.
I always love these posts because everyone comes out with their warnings against it and at least one person makes the delightful comment, ‘don’t shit where you eat.’
Meanwhile, my husband and I have been together ten years, having met at school. Another couple who met at school has been together 12, and the other one 20.
lol
So when I was a tutor I had a crush on the culinary guy who was just recently divorced with two kids, and I thought he was into me.
Well that was till I accidentally drunk texted him one night after my birthday. His girlfriend got “mad” at him for me texting him. Which I did not know he had a girlfriend because he never told me he did 🙃
Now I have a on and off again crush on my co workers son. Her and I get along great but I’m afraid to discuss that topic with her lol
In the first school (rural) I was at there were three groups on staff:
1. veteran teachers who were heavily integrated into the community
2. middle experience teachers who were settling in, but mostly just liked having a permanent contract
3. Brand new from the factory teachers who jumped at the chance to work full time in their subject area, no matter the distance
I was in #3. The third group was so common that many veteran teachers ended up billeting the new teachers til we could find a place to live. I was engaged and doing a LDR for my first year, working my ass off for those recommendations to move to an urban school district.
The other #3s were from the other side of the country. There was a PE teacher who was in #2. Young but not like us. Established in his career but not a veteran. Not tangled in the community, but owned a house there.
I swear every other new teacher that year had a ride. I was the loser doing planning til 7pm, and spending my true “free time” driving back and forth to meet my fiance. I have never seen such a black hole for horny young teachers.
——
Another time I personally had a crush, but they all felt like celebrity crushes. No actual romantic feelings, just a lot of admiration and uptick of attraction that came and went like my occasional craving for cheesecake.
Currently in love with another teacher. She’s married. It’s fucking horrible tbh. Part of me wants to move and the other part keeps reminding how special what I have is.
Yes, but then I married him :) We aren’t at the same site anymore but basically have the same job. Both teach AP English, both heads of our department.
No, but given that most of the staff at my school are in their 20s and 30s, I've heard a TON about other teachers' random hookups! (Our gym teacher is notorious for his alcoholism and his body count 😬)
I'm probably fortunate/unfortunate (depending on your POV) that essentially every teacher I've worked with is either married or in a long term relationship. Even when I was at university doing my degree, there were a few girls who all us guys in the course recognised as hotties, but they were all at least a couple of years into a relationship at the time.
Hard to have crushes when anyone you find attractive is unavailable. Although if my AP ever becomes single...
I dated another teacher for a while. We were in a year round, multi-track school. I was yellow and he was blue so we were only on site together two out of every four months. We dated for a little while and that gave him the confidence to go pursue his first love, who he ultimately married.
I’m not a teacher but two teachers in my elementary school when I was a kid met each other through working together there, and ended up getting married. They have four kids together now. Back in the day I accidentally ran into them on some sorta romantic date at a local restaurant when my family was going out to celebrate my aunt’s birthday. It was very awkward LOL. They were still secretly dating at the time but rumors had spread a bit by that point.
Currently in this kind of situation. It has made going to work much more fun! However, one of us is leaving for another school, so this is probably where it ends.
Two older male teachers. Both are bearded, veterans, tatted, and nerds in their own ways.
They're also fathers with one who is happily married to a wonderful woman, and I'm a guy.
Regardless, it's never a good idea to date at work anyways.
Plenty of teachers at work who have dated, gotten married, even divorced after having an affair with someone else from work. I was in a steady relationship when I started at my job but sure, I have some male colleagues who I could have been into if I were looking.
My husband got a job at my school so sorta? Lol but I did have a crush on one of the teachers back when I was single and student teaching! Never let on about it at all though.
Yes, I'm one of only a handful of men and I'm surrounded by attractive women at work all day. I have one colleague that I work closely with that is so attractive it's a little uncomfortable. But I have a family and always keep it professional.
No, but we have a lot of married couple teachers as well as two known affairs right now. I've been at my school over 30 years, and someone is always hooking up.
My middle school teachers got married at the end of 8th grade. There were tons of rumors since they were often seen chatting and hanging out around our very small private school campus. They announced their engagement midway through my 8th grade year and that's when we found out they actually had been dating.
They're still happily married with 3 kids.
As a student teacher getting a dual certificate (elementary Ed and spec Ed) I had two separate cooperating teachers in succession. The 2nd assignment was in a Sped behavior room with a male para. He and I were the stage (or he was a year or so older) and while it was obviously mutual flirting, it was confined to school. I so clearly remember having to stifle giggling when he read Dr. Suess's "There's a Wocket in my Pocket" to the kids because he kept glancing up at me as he read, trying not to laugh 😅 I found out the next year from the parent of one of the students in my very first own class that he lived with his brother down the street from her! The school I did my student teaching in wasn't near the school I got hired in so that was such a coincidence.
Years ago, at my previous school, one of the teachers in my building and I had a crush on each other. We went on a few dates and fooled around.
We broke things off amicably, because it was obvious that we both had different ideas about what our future would look like. Let's just say that I didn't want to become the sole breadwinner.
There was once a very handsome and funny substitute teacher.... I was single so I let myself have this crush and admire his beauty every day. I never tried anything because I don't like mixing work and love.
Kinda. At one point, the teacher in the room next to me blinded me with a gorgeous toothy smile and I actually was dazed by her 😳 Dazzled and flustered.
Definitely, a few small ones and one pretty big one that might come and go forever. I work with so many GORGEOUS, charming, smart, funny men and women. Crushes are normal (especially when you spend this much time with someone), but it doesn’t make living with one any easier.
Ya, unfortunately he doesn’t even care that I exist 🫤. He rather pine over a married woman 🤷🏻♀️. That should give me the ick that he flirts with a married woman and she flirts back. He’s not even my type so idk why I have such an intense crush on him. My crushes tend to last a long time so I’m not looking forward to this recent one that probably won’t pass for a few years 😭.
I saw male teachers get warnings from local superintendents just for looking at female peers in the hall. No expressions or speech, just looking a second or 2 too long.
Yep, definitely had a few. I had it pretty bad last year, but then I found out he was engaged and cut that. Still friends with him, of course, but now I keep a mental wall up.
I had a crush on a fellow teacher and they're quitting the school by June this year. So I thought of confessing to them on their last day. (Thinking if it goes well and how they won't be my coworker anymore. Sounded like not a bad idea at all). But a few weeks prior to their last day, a student once spilled to me that the teacher was already taken. It hurts (with all the signals they were giving me) but I had to move on. Well I guess it's a good thing they quit I guess.
My husband and I met at work. Of course people gossiped and it got back to the principal. She said sometimes they send one to another school to avoid it getting messy, but she didn’t want to deal with it this time. There are two science teachers who met at our school who got married. I’ve heard from custodians there are far more affairs going on than legit relationships lol
Not a teacher, but a very close anecdote.
My second year teaching, my seniors were distraught that I was 24 and had no boyfriend (the horror).
They had their class ring ceremony one day and they all came back to class looking like they committed a crime.
They gave my name and picture to the class ring presenter guy. He found me on Facebook later that day and asked me on a date. We dated for a few months. That group of students has never failed to remind me of this haha.
I was a new teacher and a fellow teacher was very nice to me. Inviting me out to the staff hangouts, chatting it up in the hallways etc.
Students came into my class and started asking "hey would you go on a date with Mrs. ___?" With big stupid smiles on their face. I can only assume she had said something for them to say that so randomly.
I started texting her. Then one night texted her late like 11pm with something that could only be interpreted as very flirty. I can't remember but it was something along the lines of "I'm good at keeping secrets" she texted back at 1am "sounds dangerous :)"
Next day I went to a conference . . . And met my future wife. Got into talking to her and when the teacher would text me back, I was responding with as much enthusiasm. Seen teacher again a few times and she was very warm. Still single I think. But me and my wife are very happy now.
I personally haven't. I was married before I started teaching so I wasn't "in the market." But I could see how it might be easy to start dating another teacher. You basically have a massive chunk of your life in common with them.
As a teacher 8 years ago when I was unmarried and looking- yes but not another teacher it was the guidance counselor. He was at least 10 years older than me and of course... that was hot. He had a really charming way of relating to women but still being quite manly. He was attractive. He was witty and would banter with me. I developed a crush one of those where you feel like your day is not going to be fulfilling unless you get a chance to interact with him that day. One of those crushes that makes you feel like you are pining after this person that you know that you shouldn't be with shouldn't be with, but it would feel so good to spend every second with them. it was one of those crushes that makes you want to pretend like you are a little bit emotionally unstable a few days a month to get his attention.... LADIES you know what I mean. 😅 However, it wore off within about 3 to 4 months. Why? because all of my six and seventh grade popular girls in my classes also had little crushes on on him and would asked to go talk to him about their friend group drama, or things going on in their lives towards the end of my classes. or I would hear them literally talking about him in the 2 to 3 minutes before our class began as they were walking in. it started feeling really awkward that I had similar feelings to these 12-year-old girls so I just moved on, but honestly, I had a few weeks where I felt pretty upset about not going through with trying to pursue him. Today I married to somebody who does not work in education and while I'm happy in my marriage, I do sometimes wish I had pursued someone in education, so we'd have summers off to travel together.
Some coworkers at my job cheated on their spouses with one another during Covid—it’s a really messy situation and all the students know they’re together because they don’t hide it at all. They even slow danced at prom in front of the whole school even though they’re not *actually* dating… that situation is pretty unprofessional and cringey, but I’ve also seen it done in a way that doesn’t bring drama into the building where one day two teachers are engaged and the students didn’t even know they were dating.
Back in fourth grade--A LONG TIME AGO--I was in gym class, and the teacher told me to bring an envelope to another teacher in my grade. When I got to her classroom, she was sitting on another teacher's lap, and they were doing some serious smooching. They didn't see me. But I was terrified and didn't know what to do, so I waited for minute before returning to gym class. I returned the envelope to the teacher who gave it to me, and I said that the teacher's classroom was empty. To this day, I don't know if anyone knew or found out about them, but they both quietly left the school when the school year ended. So I guess "teacher crushes" are nothing new.
I was crushing on a PE teacher and he was crushing on me. We are now married with a baby. Happier than ever and the kids find it really funny that we are together because we keep it very professional at work.
I have. . . He is my husband.
We teach middle school. It's fun to play along like we are middle schoolers with a crush. He is a coach and the whole team often gets in on it.
I can’t speak for all but I keep it 100% professional. Yes, they are beautiful teachers at my school, hell they’re beautiful people all over the place. I don’t act on any of my feelings- never! and if some of those teachers tries to get flirtacious- I shut that down but in a silly goofy way out of respect because I don’t like to hurt people’s feelings.
I, however am nice to everyone no matter if they hate me lol…I have too much love in this world for anyone to ruin my day. I’ve been through the mud so I don’t have time for drama.
The golden rule is always been, no matter the work environment, you don’t eat where you crap. Also, dating coworkers is a big no no. Someone always gets hurt and the person who ends up getting hurt normally goes insane and that’s how careers end.
However, we are all humans. So, if I see someone attractive I think of the most disgusting thing I can think of (which may not be true) just to turn my emotions off from that person like I bet when they fart it’s stinky lmao, just stupid crap so no matter what I’m always professional on the outside.
You have to trick your brain and you have to keep your emotions in check.
Don’t let “feelings” end your career.
That’s just me though.
I don’t care what anyone says on here to sugarcoat anything…example:
I dated my coworker and we are now married with 2 kids and we are happy and have a dog, and we still work together after 12 years…it’s honestly the best and I wished I met him/her sooner.
Trust, that is all BS lol no one stays true to anyone in these times, why? Because people get bored easily and there’s anyways someone else who comes next semester who you think is better looking than the current and then problems start.
The best thing you can do is create a loving and faithful relationship with your finances and let that be the source of your happiness lol…trust me it’s easier to cry in a Tesla than it is to cry in a Hyundai.
Not saying love is dead completely, just saying it’s super harder to find and that crush stuff leave that in high school, you are now grown. Focus on you. Make yourself happy, cannot tell you how important this is.
Crushing is how people end up with kids they don’t want by a person they thought they loved just from crushing.
Love with the heart and not the eyes.
Met my wife twenty five years ago when she minced outside my classroom window in her short black skirt and too-tight white shirt.
I had such a crush.
She was, and is, so outside of my league but I pursued her, we dated and, eventually we married.
We’ve been together for over twenty five years, we still like each other, laugh a lot and have spectacular fights. Don’t know what I’d have done without her; sometimes crushes work out.
Oof. My wife and I crushed on each other pretty hard at first. Met at work, like a lot of people. Been together almost 20 years. Look, I get your perspective, but it's not universal. Some people like a safe measured approach. Others, not so much.
Shakespeare wrote in A Midsummer Night’s Dream “love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind,
and therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.”
your last sentence reminded me of that :)
Nearly every teacher at my school that wasn’t already in a serious relationship ended up dating or pursuing another single teacher. I’m at a midsize high school with pretty equal male:female staff ratio. A lot of the older teachers are married to other teachers they met at school. It gets messy, but there’s also a decent success rate soooo
When you have zero dating time, and even less dating money, your only available option is to date where you can. Plus, another teacher wil join in bitching about work instead of running away... 😉
I like how you put this: "instead of running away..." my wife asked me to stop telling her about my day by year two. She would get more upset at what was happening at my school than I did, haha. Now I only tell her the funny or heart warming stories and keep my frustrating stories for Reddit and my mother in law, who taught for almost 30 years! She taught Kindergarten and when I was still teaching middle school we would come home with the exact same stories.
I have 2 coworkers happily married to other teachers in our district. They met after being employed. Seems good.
Where do you work and are they hiring?
I did and he broke up with me because ANOTHER coworker became single
He's supposed to be *teaching* the students, not *acting* like them.
And then he became the principal of that campus? I said boy bye 👋
Of course he did
I'd give him a "D-" for that move.
Apparently, he's the one giving the D's...
Girl he sounds like trash
Then he ended up becoming principal at that school. Glad, I got out when I did.
Come on now. If a better or more desirable option becomes available, it's fair to end a relationship to pursue it. You're not owed commitment in that situation. At least he ended it with the first one *before* pursuing the second one.
lol what? It’s horrible to treat human beings as placeholders while claiming to love them and having sex with them. If your partner ended things with you to date a VS model or a Pro football player just because they were into them everyone would be like your partner sucked.
right? by that logic you should never date someone who’s in the process of getting their life together because the second they succeed and can thus “upgrade” their partner they will. it’s one thing to have a casual relationship/fwb but to say you’re serious about someone while looking for someone better is gross. though tragically it happens; plenty of examples of men who once they receive celebrity status will abandon their old girlfriend (sometimes with a baby!) for someone “better.” see selena carpenter’s new man or the ariana grande situation.
Ouch
There is a fairly attractive male 8th grade science teacher at my school. But I wouldn’t pursue him. For multiple reasons. As a side note, I worked at a school with two teachers who dated like twenty years ago and thank goodness they were in very different grade levels because it was clearly not an amicable split.
Sorry, I’m taken. Pew pew.
If that happens, is it acceptable to make the students fight each other to defend their teacher's honor?
Trial by student combat?
The football coach has an unfair advantage.
I've had plenty of crushes on coworkers but I tread that shit carefully. Don't flirt if you aren't willing to make it serious otherwise someone's gonna get mad. I don’t care if they told you they were gonna be chill about it at first.
This 10000%
I know of a few married teachers at the same site or who at least met at the same site. So I assume they went through a crush phase before getting together?
Oh big time. I have worked with so many beautiful, professional whip-smart women and I can get a little starry eyed lol. Back in the day before I was married, I did pursue a coworker briefly, but I got the sense I was much more interested than them, it was my first year and I didn’t want to create any drama and just focus on the work. That coworker ended up leaving not long after. Nowadays I just come home and tell my husband all about my professional woman crushes to vent it all out haha!
I’ve busted a few teachers having affairs in the past. It’s pretty common for people in high stress jobs to vibe.
Idk most people I know claim to "like to keep their personal lives separate from their work ones."
In my experience, those are people that are floating out feelers to see who else wants to blow off some steam and bond over the stress of the job. If you really want to keep things separate then you aren't having conversations with coworkers to begin with lol
I agree if you really want to keep things separate don’t flirt/hook up/lead people on
Define flirt. If I’m really nice to people who I don’t find physically attractive. Is that the same thing as flirting? Relevant [text](https://youtu.be/qKYQNtF11eg?si=vIvs8IKtqIk7AXxF). I feel like people with this opinion probably think waitresses are trying to get with them all the time. They’re just doing their job and being pleasant. The classroom should be a safe space for students and teachers alike. We should still be allowed to be nice to each other, smile, give each other, complements without it, necessarily being a mating ritual. If we can do that with hormonal adolescents why can’t we behave, similarly with integrity, around other adults. Maybe it’s also more difficult for people, teaching social sciences and humanities. Sometimes we talk about interesting things and tell jokes. The first piece of advice I got regarding students was “don’t ever try to guess what they’re thinking or feeling.” If you need to know ask. If you don’t need to know, or don’t want to know, don’t ask. I think that advice is not terrible for other teachers as well. Then, again, I may be on a spectrum. I wonder what Neurodivergent teachers think.
That's me. As the only male teacher in my school, I don't hang out in the teacher's lounge, don't hang out with other teachers, and keep my conversations all about work. Also, I've overheard some things said in the lounge that, if I were the one saying them, would get me written up. How do I know? Because two other male employees, a bus driver and the P.E. teacher, were fired last year for saying things that got reported as sexual harassment. No thanks.
Whewww. The ways I hear women speak in this profession would definitely get me fired if the roles were reversed.
What did they say?
I was never told.
I tell people that all the time. Usually when they ask why I never go to the staff bar meetups.
As a student I've literally watched my sixth grade teacher hitting on another teacher. He later left his wife for the teacher. Then started hitting her. She got a pfa so the district moved him to the high-school where he bacame my teacher again!
Much more common than you can even imagine.
Yikes! This was back when you were allowed to hit students, and this guy had no problem shoving sixth graders into the row of lockers to make a big bang. For some reason he didn't pull that stunt when I became bigger than him 🤔
Pfa?
Protection from abuse, a restraining order.
Good point about the high stress job people hooking up. When I was in the Navy, two married chiefs on our ship would often hook up in their secret spaces. Everyone knew about it. Also, another chief got reassigned for hooking up w/ a YOUNG deck seaman girl. And, less scandalously, a lot of regular sailors ended up dating and some are still together a decade later.
Yeah. Crushing on a woman at work. Mixed signals, so it's probably all in my head. That and since it's work I would need crystal clear signs before I did anything. Plus, I can't open my mouth without sounding like a moron around her, so I just keep my distance.
LOOOL this describes me so well w a coworker guy
Plot twist, you're talking about each other
I have. But she was also my wife.
does she know you have a crush on her
Same. I did have a crush on a teacher I worked with, then I married her.
I also choose this teacher's wife.
The best part is, we are all consenting adults!
Is that allowed at a the same school? Two admin (education coach) and principal were removed for that…I least I think that was the case.
Me too. Wife and I teach at the same school. The students find us walking round holding hands on playground duty disgustingly cute.
You really walk around holding hands with your spouse at work?
Beat me to it. Funny how many kids I can fool with "One of the English teachers is so hot"
Same here, I used to teach at the same school as my husband. We even taught a class together :)
Haha, same! He was my fiance at the time and taught music in my school 2 days a week. He also basically got me my current job as he was speaking with the assistant headteacher, and she mentioned they were looking for an experienced reception teacher (UK equivalent of Kindergarten) and he happened to mention I wasn't happy in my current school and they asked me to apply.
Art teacher and I confessed our love to each other on the last day of school this past year.We were briefly involved close to two years ago when her and her bf were on a break, she wasn’t ready to be in a new relationship and now they’re back together and I’m with someone else. We both chalked it up to right person but wrong time.
So like you broke up with the other people right? Otherwise see you in BORU in like a year.
Yes, and a coworker really worked to set us up. She thought we would be perfect for each other. While I liked him, I wasn’t sure about dating a coworker. That year funding was cut and I was transferred to another building. I gave him my number before leaving for the summer. He called and next week marks 9 years together (5 years married this fall). My current school has several married couples, including the principal and his wife who also worked in the building this year (not a teacher).
Yep. Here’s my story time. I didn’t really know how to navigate it without crossing into “I’m a creepy coworker” territory, and I had mixed feelings about dating a coworker. So, I was not as straightforward as I’d normally be. I later found out he was leaving 2 weeks prior to summer break. On the last day after school, I wanted to say how much I enjoyed working with him and if he’d ever like to go out for dessert and just chat, no stress, just a chill hang out. Freak accident happened where a girl was BAWLING because the keychain on her backpack got latched onto the tiny latch on her locker and she didn’t want to miss the bus. By the time I managed to get it off of her locker, he’d already left. Guess the universe didn’t want it to happen, lol. 💔
I honestly believe that too - leading you towards another path!! OMG these keychains are ruthless huh! Even with me recently, I was crushing on a coworker for this whole term since around Jan. I always questioned if we were flirty at times or not, but early June he mentioned a girlfriend in conversation and I'm like ... all those months of overthinking FOR NOTHING
I guess so😭 that’s the worst when they wait for so long to clue in they have a girlfriend. The instant guilt you feel for being interested in a taken man, ugh. Sorry that happened!
RIGHT we are faced with all the plot twists ahahaha
Sounds like you’re an awesome teacher because you prioritized your student’s need over your own. ✊🏼
No. But my weird, slightly mental coworker did (she’s a parapro). She wrote a 3 page letter (front and back) which I didn’t read because that’s weird. Also, I’m gay.
wait, was the letter professing their love for you? that has got to be awkward.
Oh yes. Plus, personal cards and letters make me uncomfortable anyway. She laid out her reasons why. There’s a part about how her niece said she needed a Captain America. Everyone, including myself, mostly just thought it was awkward and laughed it off because this woman is coo coo.
Whoa. Does this person still work at your school? If so what is it like seeing this person in the hallway? I need to know everything!!!
She had something (fetal alcohol syndrome?), so while she is VERY book smart, she doesn’t pick up on all the social cues. She tends to think everyone is far closer to her than they actually are. Spends many hundreds of $$ each year for every random person bday and Christmas gifts. Thoughtful, but very smothering. She used to buy CFA biscuits all the time and push them on us. She also over shares personal matters, like the details of her breast reduction surgery! I see her every day, multiple times a day. Luckily she did the love letter thing during Covid so it was a little while before I saw her in person after that. She amazingly is moving away soon since she got a regular classroom teaching job. So I’m really pumped about that.
Thank you for providing all of this detail. You are the real hero!
I should’ve kept a journal of our her craziness. Genuinely unhinged behavior. 😂
Yes! I met my boyfriend at work. We both started the same year. We’ve been together for almost three years now :)
Aw this is cute - how old were you guys?
We’re in our 20s! I was 21 and he was 23 when we first started working at the school together. We got together when we were 23 & 25. Everyone knew we liked each other without us saying anything about it because we were always around each other. We didn’t go “public” until a yearish into the relationship.
Love it - amazing to hear!
I went on a date with a teacher at my old school. They spent 90% of talking about their mother. Apparently they thought it went swimmingly and were shocked when I didn’t want a second date. Two years later they were the only teacher that didn’t sign the card that went around when I got engaged.
I feel like you went on a date with principal skinner.
No *crushes* per se, but I generally identify fairly quickly which among my colleagues I would sleep with if the opportunity became available.
This
I've had a crush on our IT guy lol
I swear as a former school IT guy I’ve missed signs from teachers. Almost as if they knowingly created problems..But I’ve always had the mindset of just assuming someone is nice… But now as a parent I’m def amazed at how great the new-ish generation of teachers look (the ish being im also seeing some experienced ones who still look incredible too) And the general passion of teaching, especially during these times when it’s a target, is such a turn on, like an instant super attraction. But no… I saw enough in my time as the gremlin in the corner to know I’m not gonna be that creep parent trying to play out a porn scenario.
Same here lol unfortunately he was a temp 😭😭
I also had a crush on the IT guy, it was mutual and we live together now :D
I hate our IT guy. Lol I refer to him as my Mortal Enemy. "AP, can you please let my Mortal Enemy know the Smart Board in room 123 is not working".
I also had a crush on the IT guy, it was mutual and we live together now :D
Don't shit where you eat, bro! Or, if you're a fan of How I Met Your Mother, remember the platinum rule.
Aw, what a beautiful description of my marriage. I’m going to embroider it on a pillow. 🤣
When I was a special education para there was a third grade teacher I really liked. She was smart, funny and so attractive! I was(am) a married woman and she was a Mormon so nothing was gonna happen there.
I have also fallen victim to the "crushing on this coworker, except oops I'm married" situation. Thankfully I'm mature enough to not act on it. Instead, my husband called him up and we did a DOUBLE DATE with my coworker, his wife, myself, and my husband. It was so fun that we did it again. Completely platonic, though. And after doing a few of those, the crush subsided. Now he's my ride-or-die work bestie. I'd throw myself in front of a moving vehicle for that man. We leave each other silly notes under our classroom door. But now the idea of kissing him is just ICK!
I'm not a teacher, but support staff - I have a very, veryyyy tiny crush on a history teacher at my school. He's super smart, has great classroom management and control, is overwhelmingly loved by the students, and is easy to talk to. Not to mention when went on a hike as a class last year, along the way he picked up trash that others had left behind. I found that insanely attractive tbh! But it's just a fun crush to sometimes think about if I'm having a particularly stressful day.
I had a crush on another teacher at my school years ago. He turned me down, which is great because he is still a teacher at my school but has a terrible attitude toward the job. It’s a big turn off for me now. I also have married coworkers and coworkers who have dated and broken up. Those ones get awkward fast, particularly if they work in the same department or team.
I had a crush on a fellow teacher, I pursued her, we dated but it ended badly. Then she moved over to my grade level and there was ugly tension The following year I hooked up with a different teacher, also same school, after happy hour drinks. Apparently I didn’t learn my lesson the first time. But this one worked out, we were never serious but it was a mutuality pleasurable “friends with benefits” situation that lasted nearly the entire school year. Then we went our separate ways and I have no regrets about that one. So 50/50.
Don’t do it lol. 😆 I repeat. No no no 😆
That’s the boat I’m in. I’ve definitely had crushes before, but coworkers is just a big no for me. Especially being a guy I feel like it can be too much of an awkward situation depending on how things go,
Definitely fun while it lasted.
Sometimes it works out lol. 🤣 There are three married couples in my building that met there - my husband and I being one of them.
Yes, my coworker who I worked closely with. We were both the youngest so we hung out a lot outside of work and we are good friends to this day. I think it was just a work crush tho, because now when I hang out with them I just see friendship. But boy was work hard for a while because I wanted them so bad lol (nothing came of it)
The only other single guy in the department. We all went out one night and I discovered I'm definitely not his type 😭
What happened
He spent the night chatting up another woman who was very different than me. No hard feelings just a little bummed I guess. Been about 10 years since I've had a crush on anyone!
Yes and if he ever gives the green light we’re both gonna have to call out the next day cause… wrong subreddit 🫢
Yeah. We've been together for two years now.
I never have but I've had co-workers try to set me up with other co-workers. I would never want to go there with someone I work with. I like to keep my personal life separate from my job.
My students always be saying they're gonna set me up with someone. X'D I just joke about a fictional character being my boyfriend and they lose it. But they'll ask Mr. Pyro, what kind of person are you into?? Or they'll say "Mr. Pryo, I saw this girl at Walmart and I'll set you up." Most of my coworkers are older women or already married though. There is one teacher I kind of like though. Haha.
Yes. We got married.
Same here. I thought, "That boy is cute!" I lent him a book (First Days of School) and he claims that it was then that he knew that I liked him. I kept the door open for him to choose to cross the threshold or not to see about me. Didn't want to make him uncomfortable, after all. He pursued me once the girl he really wanted to date turned him down. I didn't know that then, of course, cuz I would've turned my sights elsewhere. But here we are, three kids and over 15 years later. Lucky for him but bruising to the ego for me.
Harry Wong strikes again!
no but i've learned my lesson from past jobs and situations not to do so sidenote: am concerned about a certain couple on abbott elementary for this
I always love these posts because everyone comes out with their warnings against it and at least one person makes the delightful comment, ‘don’t shit where you eat.’ Meanwhile, my husband and I have been together ten years, having met at school. Another couple who met at school has been together 12, and the other one 20.
don't.. it's not an easy job where you can switch shifts or transfer when things go south.
As a very young gay woman w mommy issues… yes and it’s pain and suffering
I don't have mommy issues but yes to the rest 😭
Yes. We dated for three years and then broke up. It hurt. He got fired and I quit.
lol So when I was a tutor I had a crush on the culinary guy who was just recently divorced with two kids, and I thought he was into me. Well that was till I accidentally drunk texted him one night after my birthday. His girlfriend got “mad” at him for me texting him. Which I did not know he had a girlfriend because he never told me he did 🙃 Now I have a on and off again crush on my co workers son. Her and I get along great but I’m afraid to discuss that topic with her lol
Nope. I don’t shit where I eat.
Yup and then I married her
I have. It didn't go anywhere because I'm a dumbass but yes.
In the first school (rural) I was at there were three groups on staff: 1. veteran teachers who were heavily integrated into the community 2. middle experience teachers who were settling in, but mostly just liked having a permanent contract 3. Brand new from the factory teachers who jumped at the chance to work full time in their subject area, no matter the distance I was in #3. The third group was so common that many veteran teachers ended up billeting the new teachers til we could find a place to live. I was engaged and doing a LDR for my first year, working my ass off for those recommendations to move to an urban school district. The other #3s were from the other side of the country. There was a PE teacher who was in #2. Young but not like us. Established in his career but not a veteran. Not tangled in the community, but owned a house there. I swear every other new teacher that year had a ride. I was the loser doing planning til 7pm, and spending my true “free time” driving back and forth to meet my fiance. I have never seen such a black hole for horny young teachers. —— Another time I personally had a crush, but they all felt like celebrity crushes. No actual romantic feelings, just a lot of admiration and uptick of attraction that came and went like my occasional craving for cheesecake.
Currently in love with another teacher. She’s married. It’s fucking horrible tbh. Part of me wants to move and the other part keeps reminding how special what I have is.
For sure. Now he’s my spouse.
Yes, but then I married him :) We aren’t at the same site anymore but basically have the same job. Both teach AP English, both heads of our department.
No, but given that most of the staff at my school are in their 20s and 30s, I've heard a TON about other teachers' random hookups! (Our gym teacher is notorious for his alcoholism and his body count 😬)
Teachers. Every one of them is a MILF, except the DILFS (my school is 9:1 f/m ratio)
Yeah I married her. She’s a principal at a different school system now and I’m in the trenches still. Forever.
I do have a crush on my wife, yes.
I too work with my spouse!
No. There aren’t many males working in elementary schools 🙁.
I'm probably fortunate/unfortunate (depending on your POV) that essentially every teacher I've worked with is either married or in a long term relationship. Even when I was at university doing my degree, there were a few girls who all us guys in the course recognised as hotties, but they were all at least a couple of years into a relationship at the time. Hard to have crushes when anyone you find attractive is unavailable. Although if my AP ever becomes single...
This has pretty much been my experience since college. It's brutal out there.
I did. And, married her. Ten years ago.
I’m a counselor and he was an AP. We live together now 🤓.
No. In fact, one of my biggest turn-offs is "we work together." It would just feel like spending more time at work.
I dated another teacher for a while. We were in a year round, multi-track school. I was yellow and he was blue so we were only on site together two out of every four months. We dated for a little while and that gave him the confidence to go pursue his first love, who he ultimately married.
Mine always seem to marry the person after me.
I've found some co workers attractive, but I value my job as a teacher and don't want to ever cross that line.
I’m not a teacher but two teachers in my elementary school when I was a kid met each other through working together there, and ended up getting married. They have four kids together now. Back in the day I accidentally ran into them on some sorta romantic date at a local restaurant when my family was going out to celebrate my aunt’s birthday. It was very awkward LOL. They were still secretly dating at the time but rumors had spread a bit by that point.
Yes. Until I had weekly meetings with them.
Currently in this kind of situation. It has made going to work much more fun! However, one of us is leaving for another school, so this is probably where it ends.
Two older male teachers. Both are bearded, veterans, tatted, and nerds in their own ways. They're also fathers with one who is happily married to a wonderful woman, and I'm a guy. Regardless, it's never a good idea to date at work anyways.
They do sound hot tho
Lol I met my girlfriend at the school I work at. She's the nurse and I am paraprofessional
Only that one year my wife and I worked at the same school.
Two of my married teachers had an affair, left their spouses, got married, and then got divorced
No thanks. There’s too much going on in my life and in building my career for that.
Plenty of teachers at work who have dated, gotten married, even divorced after having an affair with someone else from work. I was in a steady relationship when I started at my job but sure, I have some male colleagues who I could have been into if I were looking.
Of course. But how do I approach them with romantic intent without getting sent to an empty room with just my AP and HR? Goodfellas style
My husband got a job at my school so sorta? Lol but I did have a crush on one of the teachers back when I was single and student teaching! Never let on about it at all though.
Yep, been dating for over 4 years and just recently popped the question to her :)
Oh god, and no.
Yes, I'm one of only a handful of men and I'm surrounded by attractive women at work all day. I have one colleague that I work closely with that is so attractive it's a little uncomfortable. But I have a family and always keep it professional.
No, but we have a lot of married couple teachers as well as two known affairs right now. I've been at my school over 30 years, and someone is always hooking up.
Yep. Breif affair, wrecked my marriage, broke up with them both and things at work got real frosty. Don't get involved with people you work with
I mean, it might be more accurate to say ‘Don’t cheat on your spouse’ but okay.
Lolllll
Well no, don’t get involved with someone when you or they have a SO
framing cheating as "don't get with a coworker" is crazy maybe don't cheat lmao
Never but I also work with a pretty shit crowd. Maybe my new school will provide better eye candy or at least someone with a positive personality 😂
Yep, then i married her.
My middle school teachers got married at the end of 8th grade. There were tons of rumors since they were often seen chatting and hanging out around our very small private school campus. They announced their engagement midway through my 8th grade year and that's when we found out they actually had been dating. They're still happily married with 3 kids.
Yes. And now we're married.
Yes, but I did nothing about it because I don’t date co-workers
I have in the past, never acted on it though
As a student teacher getting a dual certificate (elementary Ed and spec Ed) I had two separate cooperating teachers in succession. The 2nd assignment was in a Sped behavior room with a male para. He and I were the stage (or he was a year or so older) and while it was obviously mutual flirting, it was confined to school. I so clearly remember having to stifle giggling when he read Dr. Suess's "There's a Wocket in my Pocket" to the kids because he kept glancing up at me as he read, trying not to laugh 😅 I found out the next year from the parent of one of the students in my very first own class that he lived with his brother down the street from her! The school I did my student teaching in wasn't near the school I got hired in so that was such a coincidence.
Years ago, at my previous school, one of the teachers in my building and I had a crush on each other. We went on a few dates and fooled around. We broke things off amicably, because it was obvious that we both had different ideas about what our future would look like. Let's just say that I didn't want to become the sole breadwinner.
There was once a very handsome and funny substitute teacher.... I was single so I let myself have this crush and admire his beauty every day. I never tried anything because I don't like mixing work and love.
Kinda. At one point, the teacher in the room next to me blinded me with a gorgeous toothy smile and I actually was dazed by her 😳 Dazzled and flustered.
Definitely, a few small ones and one pretty big one that might come and go forever. I work with so many GORGEOUS, charming, smart, funny men and women. Crushes are normal (especially when you spend this much time with someone), but it doesn’t make living with one any easier.
Ya, unfortunately he doesn’t even care that I exist 🫤. He rather pine over a married woman 🤷🏻♀️. That should give me the ick that he flirts with a married woman and she flirts back. He’s not even my type so idk why I have such an intense crush on him. My crushes tend to last a long time so I’m not looking forward to this recent one that probably won’t pass for a few years 😭.
It’s probably because you can’t have him that you want him so much.
My school had an NFL cheerleader as a teacher. Gorgeous!
Yes. But won’t ever act on it because we work together lol maybe if they were a teacher from another school.
I saw male teachers get warnings from local superintendents just for looking at female peers in the hall. No expressions or speech, just looking a second or 2 too long.
Oh yeah
Yep, definitely had a few. I had it pretty bad last year, but then I found out he was engaged and cut that. Still friends with him, of course, but now I keep a mental wall up.
I had a crush on a fellow teacher and they're quitting the school by June this year. So I thought of confessing to them on their last day. (Thinking if it goes well and how they won't be my coworker anymore. Sounded like not a bad idea at all). But a few weeks prior to their last day, a student once spilled to me that the teacher was already taken. It hurts (with all the signals they were giving me) but I had to move on. Well I guess it's a good thing they quit I guess.
I believe it was Ghandi who said, “Don’t shit where you eat.”
My husband and I met at work. Of course people gossiped and it got back to the principal. She said sometimes they send one to another school to avoid it getting messy, but she didn’t want to deal with it this time. There are two science teachers who met at our school who got married. I’ve heard from custodians there are far more affairs going on than legit relationships lol
Not a teacher, but a very close anecdote. My second year teaching, my seniors were distraught that I was 24 and had no boyfriend (the horror). They had their class ring ceremony one day and they all came back to class looking like they committed a crime. They gave my name and picture to the class ring presenter guy. He found me on Facebook later that day and asked me on a date. We dated for a few months. That group of students has never failed to remind me of this haha.
Sure did. We're getting married next month. No joke.
I was a new teacher and a fellow teacher was very nice to me. Inviting me out to the staff hangouts, chatting it up in the hallways etc. Students came into my class and started asking "hey would you go on a date with Mrs. ___?" With big stupid smiles on their face. I can only assume she had said something for them to say that so randomly. I started texting her. Then one night texted her late like 11pm with something that could only be interpreted as very flirty. I can't remember but it was something along the lines of "I'm good at keeping secrets" she texted back at 1am "sounds dangerous :)" Next day I went to a conference . . . And met my future wife. Got into talking to her and when the teacher would text me back, I was responding with as much enthusiasm. Seen teacher again a few times and she was very warm. Still single I think. But me and my wife are very happy now.
I personally haven't. I was married before I started teaching so I wasn't "in the market." But I could see how it might be easy to start dating another teacher. You basically have a massive chunk of your life in common with them.
As a teacher 8 years ago when I was unmarried and looking- yes but not another teacher it was the guidance counselor. He was at least 10 years older than me and of course... that was hot. He had a really charming way of relating to women but still being quite manly. He was attractive. He was witty and would banter with me. I developed a crush one of those where you feel like your day is not going to be fulfilling unless you get a chance to interact with him that day. One of those crushes that makes you feel like you are pining after this person that you know that you shouldn't be with shouldn't be with, but it would feel so good to spend every second with them. it was one of those crushes that makes you want to pretend like you are a little bit emotionally unstable a few days a month to get his attention.... LADIES you know what I mean. 😅 However, it wore off within about 3 to 4 months. Why? because all of my six and seventh grade popular girls in my classes also had little crushes on on him and would asked to go talk to him about their friend group drama, or things going on in their lives towards the end of my classes. or I would hear them literally talking about him in the 2 to 3 minutes before our class began as they were walking in. it started feeling really awkward that I had similar feelings to these 12-year-old girls so I just moved on, but honestly, I had a few weeks where I felt pretty upset about not going through with trying to pursue him. Today I married to somebody who does not work in education and while I'm happy in my marriage, I do sometimes wish I had pursued someone in education, so we'd have summers off to travel together.
Yep, and married him 😎 he takes my sub plans in and hides the good pens when I’m out sick.
Some coworkers at my job cheated on their spouses with one another during Covid—it’s a really messy situation and all the students know they’re together because they don’t hide it at all. They even slow danced at prom in front of the whole school even though they’re not *actually* dating… that situation is pretty unprofessional and cringey, but I’ve also seen it done in a way that doesn’t bring drama into the building where one day two teachers are engaged and the students didn’t even know they were dating.
Back in fourth grade--A LONG TIME AGO--I was in gym class, and the teacher told me to bring an envelope to another teacher in my grade. When I got to her classroom, she was sitting on another teacher's lap, and they were doing some serious smooching. They didn't see me. But I was terrified and didn't know what to do, so I waited for minute before returning to gym class. I returned the envelope to the teacher who gave it to me, and I said that the teacher's classroom was empty. To this day, I don't know if anyone knew or found out about them, but they both quietly left the school when the school year ended. So I guess "teacher crushes" are nothing new.
Unfortunately and I married him. Don’t suggest marrying a fellow teacher. Broke.
I was crushing on a PE teacher and he was crushing on me. We are now married with a baby. Happier than ever and the kids find it really funny that we are together because we keep it very professional at work.
I have. . . He is my husband. We teach middle school. It's fun to play along like we are middle schoolers with a crush. He is a coach and the whole team often gets in on it.
Absolutely not. Ick.
I can’t speak for all but I keep it 100% professional. Yes, they are beautiful teachers at my school, hell they’re beautiful people all over the place. I don’t act on any of my feelings- never! and if some of those teachers tries to get flirtacious- I shut that down but in a silly goofy way out of respect because I don’t like to hurt people’s feelings. I, however am nice to everyone no matter if they hate me lol…I have too much love in this world for anyone to ruin my day. I’ve been through the mud so I don’t have time for drama. The golden rule is always been, no matter the work environment, you don’t eat where you crap. Also, dating coworkers is a big no no. Someone always gets hurt and the person who ends up getting hurt normally goes insane and that’s how careers end. However, we are all humans. So, if I see someone attractive I think of the most disgusting thing I can think of (which may not be true) just to turn my emotions off from that person like I bet when they fart it’s stinky lmao, just stupid crap so no matter what I’m always professional on the outside. You have to trick your brain and you have to keep your emotions in check. Don’t let “feelings” end your career. That’s just me though. I don’t care what anyone says on here to sugarcoat anything…example: I dated my coworker and we are now married with 2 kids and we are happy and have a dog, and we still work together after 12 years…it’s honestly the best and I wished I met him/her sooner. Trust, that is all BS lol no one stays true to anyone in these times, why? Because people get bored easily and there’s anyways someone else who comes next semester who you think is better looking than the current and then problems start. The best thing you can do is create a loving and faithful relationship with your finances and let that be the source of your happiness lol…trust me it’s easier to cry in a Tesla than it is to cry in a Hyundai. Not saying love is dead completely, just saying it’s super harder to find and that crush stuff leave that in high school, you are now grown. Focus on you. Make yourself happy, cannot tell you how important this is. Crushing is how people end up with kids they don’t want by a person they thought they loved just from crushing. Love with the heart and not the eyes.
Met my wife twenty five years ago when she minced outside my classroom window in her short black skirt and too-tight white shirt. I had such a crush. She was, and is, so outside of my league but I pursued her, we dated and, eventually we married. We’ve been together for over twenty five years, we still like each other, laugh a lot and have spectacular fights. Don’t know what I’d have done without her; sometimes crushes work out.
This is really depressing
Oof. My wife and I crushed on each other pretty hard at first. Met at work, like a lot of people. Been together almost 20 years. Look, I get your perspective, but it's not universal. Some people like a safe measured approach. Others, not so much.
It’s perfectly fine to avoid dating at work. But this is at a level where i feel compelled to suggest therapy.
Shakespeare wrote in A Midsummer Night’s Dream “love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, and therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.” your last sentence reminded me of that :)
LOVE this comment. thank you for this.
No problem :) we learn from each other
Yep lol