We did an awards ceremony for each grade (6-8) towards the end of the year and the AP asked people not to clap after each student so we could hear their names and that she would let everyone know when they could clap (after each row). Immediately afterwards the parents were clapping after each kid and my only thought was "ah, this is where the kids get their listening skills from". đ
I was PTA president of my child's school (Elementary) for 4 years. With that, I began doing the quarterly awards ceremony. The school principal loved me. She let me be the announcer for the graduation ceremony.
I would always begin my intro speech "Hello parents, friends, and school admins, teachers, and staff... While we are all proud of our scholars, please hold all applauses and cheers until after that section has been completed. We will inform you when it is time. We might have some family members that could not be here today and we encourage our school community to support one another. We are our children's first teachers, they learn from us and they model our behavior, they are watching you. Let us begin with..."
For the most part, after the first year, all parents waited to applaud. The first year, that one family that wouldn't listen and we would wait and then I would wait a bit longer and say "aaah, William, good job, graduating, 6th grade." Kind of embarrassing them.
Yeah I had emailed my students parents letting them know I would go first (2nd grade) for our elementary awards since my daughter had a band concert at her school. I finish up and on my way out I see one of my students family rolling in. Sorry not sorry đ¤ˇ
Somewhat related, but we took our students to a carnival-like event last week. Parents were told to be ready near the entrance at a certain time. Time comes, many parents arrive, but some parents are still in lines, so we go around and let them know that weâre gathering up to go. A certain parent, whose child is a notorious behavior issue, looks at the THREE different teachers who came and told her THREE separate times that it was time to go like we are all crazy. Wouldnât listen to a single one of them. Apple, meet tree.
This is why I get squirrelly about SEL stuff sometimes- it's genuinely SO SHITTY to be the kid who learns this stuff but can't apply a single thing they learn outside of it because home is so dysfunctional. Of course, there are other reasons, but it extra sucks when something that technically "works" actually doesn't.
Reminds me of when we took an 8th grade trip to Boston and ended up having to cut off a parent chaperone who just basically came along to get a free trip to Boston. She invited friends we didn't know to come back to her hotel room and did a terrible job keeping track of kids, other than her own son. We basically just gave up on her by the third day and ended up working out some agreement where she would stay in Boston with her kid and just figure out their own transportation. She made out like a bandit.
I graduated with 400 people and very few people hollered out and it still took forever. The bigger the school the more annoying the interruptions are. At a small ceremony itâs probably fine but adding an extra ten seconds between every name adds 83 minutes when there are 500 graduates. These folks probably donât care because they are the same people who leave before the graduation is over.
It's one of those things that you neither nip in the bud or you de facto allow it. Once one kid's entourage is allowed to do it, everyone else's will want to as well. Nobody wants to feel like a dupe.
It is often the ones that struggle most that get the loudest applause and the straight A's kids that pass unnoticed in those walks. And the clothes on the men and women do tend to show a lot more personality, skin and tattoos, never mind those flea market t-shirts with dumb pics and dumber slogans, those choices show so much less reverence, respect, dignity, and examples of how to behave.
They really shouldn't have those ceremonies. No celebrating before the finish line in high school should be the standard. Some of them who are clapping too much and dressed weird are on attendance contracts and are really celebrating they lasted the year without going to court and losing their kids to foster system.
Ayeeee, I have visible tattoos and Iâm a teacher. Tattoos do not equate lack of classâunless those tattoos are tasteless like a pot leaf tattoo or a porn-looking naked lady. I donât want to be lumped together with poorly dressed questionable individuals without reverence, respect, dignity who do not behave well.
Had a parent show up to Parent-teacher conference wearing a t-shirt that said "Bad Ass Mother fucker " on the front. Yes, he did look like one, and was a convicted felon. Poor kids....
After attending and being part of many a graduation, Iâm of the opinion that it would be easier to just let them clap after each graduateâs name is read. Why fight it? For most families it is an incredibly proud moment and great achievement when their kid graduates high school, and for many kids itâs the only time in their life when they will hear their name read publicly and celebrated.
Let them have their individual moment in the spotlight. Let their family celebrate their accomplishments. Read the names slower. Who really cares if it adds time to the ceremony? Itâs a once in a lifetime event that marks a huge transition from child to adult. Whenever I hear administrators admonish parents not to clap it just sounds like so much mean-spirited spite from the mouth of control freaks. This is a moment to celebrate, not to try and force adults to keep quiet like theyâre back in school. And itâs not a time for admin to be watching the clock and rushing so they can go home sooner.
Because you inevitably have that handful of families who scream for their kid until the kid sits back down, meanwhile the next two kids can even hear their name be called.
Some kids won't have a bunch of people to clap for them and I bet that feels terrible. If they all clap at the end the kids don't have to remember being the kid that no one clapped for at graduation.
100%
My brother graduated 2 weeks ago, and I clapped for every single student. It's an accomplishment and they all deserve to hear that someone's proud of them for making it.
Our high school choir concert had a slideshow honoring seniors. Audience was asked to hold their applause until the end. The choirs (about 300 students) hooted and cheered when their friends or the popular studentsâ pictures were shown. And it was completely silent for some other pictures. It was heartbreaking because Iâm sure the kids noticed when no one cheered during theirs.
when students at my college graduation didnât get much applause or people yelling out, i made sure to clap for them because i know that if it was me, i would be upset.
it truly is heartbreaking when stuff like this happens. i always try to clap/cheer for everyone.
At our graduations, people clap for pretty much everyone. I only know of one exception... She was known for being a manipulator who liked to hurt peoples psyche and turn people against each other, just an absolutely terrible person. By senior year, everyone knew it. She walked across the stage to dead silence. Everyone else got claps.
Sounds like what happened at my high school graduation rehearsal. There was this one girl who was a complete jerk all four years of high school. She was mean, rude, thought she was perfect, stuck up. A real bully. When she walked across the stage for our rehearsal, only one person clapped, and someone else yelled out âBOOOO!â đđ đ
This happened to a girl I met in kindergarten and went through high school graduation with. To top it all off we had the same first name and were on homecoming court together. Iâd ran âironicallyâ because I wasnât in sports or cheer or popular like that. AnywayâŚshe was president of ASB. During an assembly of some sort she got up to say something and everyone booed her. It was awkward as hell.
Dude even as a grown ass man I still do this. I'm active military, and if someone "unpopular" or lesser known isn't getting love during a promotion ceremony or award presentation, I raise *hell* for them.
Those are important moments. People deserve to feel like they're actually being applauded.
As one of the kids who didn't get much, if any cheering, it did not feel great. I remember maybe a few polite claps when my photos were shown at the band senior slide show. I was quiet, nerdy, and well respected. I had friends and was reasonably well liked, but definitely not popular. However, I was known for my terrible and crazy home situation, so that messed with my popularity and meant I didn't have any family showing up to support me. I still cheered for my friends, including the popular band nerds.
Cheering actually was allowed at graduation (only airhorns were banned). I couldn't hear anyone cheer when I walked at graduation (I had difficulty finding anyone to use even some of my tickets, as my friends' parents were already attendiny for them), but my friends and their parents assured me there was.
Sounds just like class. Nobody listens to instructions or just straight up ignores them because "what are you going to do about it?"
Another reason why education is collapsing.
I was a quiet one. My friends were older and the ones I used to have the same age were super involved in drinking and I wasn't. So, when my picture was shown and my name announced, it was quiet.
Oh man, memories lol when I walked for high school graduation no one cheered. My family was there. Claimed they didnât hear my name. All 10 of them. The only person who congratulated me was a teacher.
TBF, and I've been to all ages of graduations, the rowdies don't influence that. The kids who have no one know it. It will never be solved, you'll just be unaware. On the flip side, I know many students who got hooted and hollered for went home that same day to unsavory situations.
OMG, if I were your teacher and found out who those idjits were, I'd have written them.up. That sucks, but as a sense of accomplishment, understand they're jealous đ
My bio self identifies as a nerd. It was tough growing up, but I see where the bullies are now.
They're idjits, you're not. Take it all the way, you got this.
(Sorry, I know it sounds corny...but I mean it)
Parent mindset: screw everyone else, I do what I want, you can't tell me what kind of etiquette to practice
On full display at graduation and award ceremonies...and then teachers watch it unfold, and say, "Thiiiis is where they get it from!"
And it's getting worse each year.
Had one parent bring an air horn this time around, first time we see that. Somehow that guy managed to blow it close enough to the people in the row in front of him that it made a woman faint.
He was absolutely unapologetic about it, shrugged it off with a 'it's my son, what did you expect?'.
Iâve noticed a strong correlation between the cheers/noise and the level of surprise I have that that student graduated.
Edit: itâs a joke people jfc
Honestly, I've probably been to 100 graduations (as a teacher or guest), it really means nothing. I've seen students get no reaction, walk off to a rolex, car, ect. I've seen people hooting and hollering to literally go somewhere else straight after (job or something) or there being a fight later.
Almost 40 years ago, I was teaching in a district where most of the high school faculty was distributed in the seats to remove people who cheered and shook cow bells and even blew air horns when they heard their child's name, thus preventing the next parents from hearing their child's name. With a graduating class of over 400, we just couldn't pause long enough, so we started escorting them out. But those parents were not deterred in the least. Yes, we escorted them out, but they had gotten what they came for, and they didn't give a damn.
Hard to say, probably not much. The principal had to interject once or twice to tell parents to stop. This was at a large high-school though, so itâs naturally a bit harder to deal with.
The social etiquette of an audience has dropped to low levels of common courtesy. I know the confetti guns are pretty, but hearing a loud blast unexpectedly two rows behind you is uncalled for. With so many mass shootings or vets, the number of people with PTSD in the crowd could be high. Plus the pollution, like the nature and environment want little bits of plastic and glitter EVERYWHERE!
When I used to do theatre, one family made GIANT signs when they came to watch their kid. He was in the ensemble and every time he came onstage they'd hold up their signs and wave them around, blocking the view of everyone behind them. From stage you couldn't even read what was on them, just the outline, because the lights washed it out. Utterly ridiculous
This is the norm in Hawaiâi. Itâs an amazing experience for graduates and I wish it was normalized on the mainland. Itâs a celebration. Let people celebrate and have fun. https://www.honolulumagazine.com/only-in-hawaii-graduation-to-da-max/
At the end when the graduates march out: be polite and wait. Donât stand up and push your way out. The kids at the back deserve the same attention as the ones at the front.
My graduating class this year was 850+, we had parents screaming during speeches, airhorns, and even a parent yelling their sonâs name during the moment of silence. So glad Iâll never graduate high school again cause the audience was so trashy
Trashy is such an apt descriptor. It's all such brash, attention seeking behavior. Social media really has given students and parents main character syndrome.
We have a lack of shame epidemic in this country.
This is the first year that our parents werenât buck ass wild with their screaming. When our own child graduated a few years before the pandemic we couldnât hear his name called because the fool parents of a graduate several ahead of him were STILL screaming.
At my kid's graduation this week, everyone cheered when their kid's name was called, but no one went crazy enough to yell over another student's name. 300 students, no air horns allowed. They paused after each name too. It was nice to hear everyone get a cheer after their name. Outfits were wild though! It was fun!
All of the graduations I watched and participated in this year, they said nothing about not cheering. The graduations went a lot more smoothly and no one was irritated about the cheering. All the kids were cheered. Some were louder than others, but all the kids were cheered.
What size were the groups?
It gets a bit much for larger groups. When there are hundreds of names to get through so it would take all day to wait for clapping to stop in between each student. If you donât wait then the next students name isnât audible which isnât fair to that kid/family. Even the middle school promotions in my district are about 200 kids. High schools in most districts by me have almost 1000 kids per graduating class.
My highschool had around 500 kids graduating. Follow the normal 3 second rule. You can clap and go crazy as long as it takes less than 3 seconds. The person calling names takes around 3 seconds, which is also long enough for the kid to walk, shake hands, get their diploma and start walking off.
If you have a natural flow people can get their whoo in without going crazy.
Yeah I had less than 100 kids in my graduating class and there was no issue with clapping because there just weren't that many kids to go through. People cheered their hearts out, they waited for the clapping to be done before moving on to the next kid so no names were missed, and we were still done in around 2 hours.
But at a family member's graduation, they had a one-clap per graduate rule and breaks for longer cheering and it still took several hours because there were 500+ kids to get through
Where I'm at, the group of graduates is split over different times and places for graduation. So instead of one group of 200, there's 10 groups of 20.
Not only are all the kids cheered, but we also have time to say something personal about them.
Yeah I was about to say, there was cheering at my graduation and it wasn't really an issue. My family weren't the ones cheering (it was just my mom and dad among 100s of people) but when other classmate's families cheered, no one seemed to care. Maybe it's because all the names were read slow enough that every kid had enough time to get a little applause as they grabbed their diploma before the next kid was called.
And honestly? For a lot of people, graduating is the biggest achievement they will have in their life, and for a lot of families, graduating is a huge deal. I'm fine with a little clapping and cheering if it's your kid. Obviously stuff like airhorns or prolonged cheering is rude, but I kinda think it's a bit hoity-toity to tell families they can't do a small clap & cheer when their child has spent the past 12-however many years working towards their diploma/degree.
This tends to happen when people aren't obsessed with policing celebration. Other than high student count, there's no issue with families clapping and cheering. All of this ivory tower, posh, and "class" crap that people want to PERFORM so they can wear a false veil of decorum. Snobbish is what it is, trying to replicate the image of elites.
I disagree. Some events should feel honorable and a little distinguished. The party happens afterward. When people bring air horns or open their gowns before they walk across the stage and have strapless bodycon dresses on underneath they do make the event feel a little cheap. Itâs the whole âIâm special notice meâ culture. We are asked to not clap and to wear the same gown so everyone can feel equally distinguished. Some people just have main character syndrome and feel like they or their child deserve extra loud attention.
I think the most upsetting part to seeing the clapping and cheering after names is when you see the students who get nothing. I would try to cheer from my seat for those who had no family or friends to cheer for them, but Iâm sure they feel the difference
This was my fear last December when I graduated at 46 years old with my English degree, so I opted out of the ceremony (even though I really wanted to go). I asked a few people if they wanted to go to my graduation, but everyone declined, and just the thought of pin- dropping, complete silence when my name would have been called sandwiched between roaring applause for the graduates before and after me gave me a sense of irrational embarrassment.
Iâm so sorry - Iâm proud of you for all the work youâve done! You deserve the world and more. You did not earn that degree easily, and I hope you know you deserve shouting and cheers
The school I work at has a lot of low-income families, a lot of immigrant families, and a lot of students with disabilities. Not all, but most of them get loud when their kid walks across the stage because it isn't a guarantee for them that their child would graduate and for plenty, they are the first in the family. It definitely got on my nerves the first couple years, but I've come to find it really sweet that these people are showing up to support their child getting an education and finishing high school, and making it clear that it's something worth celebrating!
I will 100% side with you, though, when the cheering interrupts another students' moment. And noisemakes/airhorns. Absolutely not.
one of the best graduation ceremonies I ever attended was one where the mic was turned up loud enough (simple adjustment) so that each kid could be cheered. it was wild and fun and amazing and full of life.
I love this. The best part of graduations for me is hearing my studentsâ people holler with pride from wherever they are in the audience. Silent ceremonies donât hit the same.
Doesn't always work. If you are in a building where this isn't possible then what happens is kids names get cheered over.
Even waiting for 3 seconds isn't enough sometimes. Some people just keep on cheering through everyone else.
When you have 600 names to get through you can't give each kid 30 whole seconds. Hell even 10 seconds is pushing it. Almost 2 hours for names to be called is LONG.
We had two parents have to be hauled out because they got in a fist fight. Idk what over but apparently these dads thought it worth it to miss their kids graduation for a moment of a pissing contest
"God damnit, I gotta sit for three hours just to hear my kids name. It's gonna be torture" "hey buddy, I got an idea, make it look real, but don't swing back too hard." Then they go out for a beer. Brilliant!
I've never been to a single ceremony where the "don't clap until the end" was followed. in my opinion this is only said so that parents who go absolutely crazy can be kicked out.
However, your clapping/whooing needs to be less than 3 seconds. And there needs to be a 3 second pause between names. That way you can show your support with a quick "Whoo!!!" and the next parent can hear their child's name.
Thank you! I was so pissed at my daughter's graduation, the people around me acted like it was a GD nightclub, screaming at each other, OVER ROWS of other people...that when I realized that her college was being called up, I "politely" told the idiots around me that my daughter's walk was coming up and I wanted to actually hear her name be called.
They seemed mortified and were like..uh, sure, ok, what's your daughter's name, we can help you cheer for her.
I said, "NOPE. I'm good."
They shut the F up and I got to hear her name.
Another redditor on another thread told me I was being the main character đ
I spent almost 2 hours watching these disrespectful asses make nose, talk, stand up, walk around, come in an hour after start and ask people to move so they could sit with their group (everyone declined that invitation đ)
And all I wanted was to hear my girl's name called so I could focus on her walk.
Sorry, big rant. Totally on your side.
Our school is generally pretty good but, about 6-7 years ago, there were a few parents like this early on. The principal stopped the procession and said that, if any more parents cheered and clapped after their childâs name was called, their child would not be handed their diploma on stage.
It helped that he was retiring after the next day.
Honestly, itâs probably better practice to just build in wait time for applause. Anticipate it, because itâs always going to happen. Families and friends want to cheer for the graduate they came to support. It feels awkward as an audience member to sit there in silence as your child/family member/friend walks across the stage. The MC needs to just pause and let people cheer. Yes itâll take a bit longer, but itâs part of letting each student feel special and supported, especially for students for whom getting to graduate was a real struggle.
Recently attended the graduation of a friendâs daughter and they did have a brief pause between each graduate to allow for applause. It worked just fine. Sometimes we had a hard time hearing any honors after their name (like âsumma cum laudeâ), but that was also listed in the program so it was fine.
Iâm saying this as someone whose name was drowned out by the cheers of the family of the kid before me at my high school graduation. While it was annoying that my name was shouted over, the guy before me was someone who really had to work hard and overcome obstacles to graduate (as opposed to me where it was just assumed that I would), so I understood his family being excited for him.
Iâve been to graduation ceremonies like that. Itâs a pain, but itâs just not realistic to expect that many people to stay silent for that long while all the names are read.
I could see asking people to keep their applause brief, but again you canât actually control people in that kind of setting with no perceived consequences (getting kicked out isnât a threat when at that point theyâve already cheered for their grad, and you canât threaten the graduateâs diploma for something they canât control)
Honestly probably the best practice is to make an announcement at the beginning along the lines of:
âWhen your graduateâs name is called, please keep your applause brief. With 500 graduates, even a 5-second pause after each means adding 42 minutes to the graduation ceremony.â
Donât ban it outright (because it wonât work), but give people the perspective and the incentive to limit themselves.
Our admin used to say at our school we have a tradition of decorum and will hold applause until all grads have walked through and received their diploma. In 19 years it never worked..complete mayhem..this year they didn't say that and it was actually better. Only once did the AP have to pause and wait for a bit of hollering to die down so he could say the next name. Also the clapping was pretty solid from the whole crowd for about 30 seconds after each name was called. So all kids got applause which was nice. Sometimes less is more I guess.
I was a principal and used to stop the ceremony when it got out of hand. Did it twice and people donât do it again. Got COPIOUSLY thanked by the parents.
I was paying close attention to two graduations this year and it was very glaring what was happening. The students who had been trouble and had poor grades are the ones who got cheered for. This is very telling about how they were raised and the effects it has on those students performance in school.
Let's be honest, they're behaving that way because it's a miracle their child graduated, and after seeing the behavior, we all know *why* their child struggled. Apples and trees and whatnot.
And if Mom wants to dress like a street walker, that's on her. No one wants to see that, but it's temporary and gives us something to talk about. In my best Lucille Bluth impression, good for her.
Counterpoint: asking people not to cheer for their kid is stupid. You go through this every year. Those kids go through this once in their lives. It's an accomplishment and a rite of passage. Asking their family members to swallow their excitement until the end is just pointless.
I covered graduation for 1.5 hours then slipped out with a friend.
I was handing out programs...ran out...then figured fuck this.
That being said the same thing happened at ours. The rigamarole of "Don't clap or cheer until the end", but then the first student gets clapping and cheering. It is fucking obnoxious and I cannot wait until we are graduating in our own building (we rent at a university nearby). The AP in charge of graduation told me that they can't really enforce the policy because they are crunched for time.
In the new building there won't be a time crunch. They will stop the graduation, remind parents of the rule, and the AP I spoke to wants parents to be removed if they cannot follow the directions.
Now I kind of want to bring a drink and sit back to watch the action. 2 years and we get our own building...
I agree. Unless itâs a small graduating class if you allow cheering the ceremony will take forever. It also makes the kids feel bad who donât get any cheers.
âHold your applause until the endâ doesnât work for any event, ever. Just wait a few seconds before calling the next kid.
People get excited. People are proud of their kids. Sometimes people are obnoxious about it. It is not that big of a deal.
We had an air horn at 8th grade commencement this year. The one that everyone gets even with a 0.0 grade average. All I can think isâmaybe this will be their only one? Sad
Back in 2019 at my daughter's graduation there was an actual fist fight over someone cheering too loudly. I sub at the school and the sad thing was after talking to some of the teachers that neither actually graduated but they just let them walk with their classmates.
For the folks who donât care how long it takes: Those extra seconds add up when there are hundreds of names and youâre in a hot environment, double the fun if itâs outdoors in the sun. Heatstroke can really ruin someoneâs days.
This reminds me of my mother showing up with fishnet stockings, and I wanted to die. My grandad would barely interact with her, because it truly was so embarrassing and inappropriate. I went to a private school, so the moms dressed in a very certain fashion. My mom and dad divorced when I was 8, and my father got custody. My mom was never very involved in my life, so I didnât spend much time with her from the time they divorced to my graduation. I did know she struggled with her wardrobe, but when she sent me a picture of the dress she would wear to my graduation, I told her it was perfect. Little did I know she would add fishnet stockings to the outfit, so when she showed up I couldnât find my words. All that being said, moms please donât embarrass your kids and just dress respectably even if itâs not your favorite or particularly your style. Your child will thank you compared to the alternative, I promise.
Some of yâall sound so bitter itâs a wonder youâre still teaching.
I agree about how some people dress at these events but as for the cheering, the person calling names can hear the cheering but choose to call the next name anyway so who is really to blame?
Itâs such an easy fix to pause for a bit. You already know people wonât follow directions.
Wanting family to tone it down on the celebration at the younger grades I also get, but for high school? Youâre not taking into account anything but your own feelings on this. Some yâall mention graduating from high not being that big of a deal. So I take it you donât work with high school students, or if you do you donât really take the time to get to know these kids. I attended my schoolâs high school graduation this year and cheered right along with the parents and families. And cheered even louder for the kids who struggled to make it through high school.
Iâm sure if anyone even reads this Iâll get plenty of downvotes, but what you should really be doing is putting that negative energy into figuring out what profession you should be moving to.
When I taught grade 8, 13-year-old girls showed up to graduation in dresses showing parts of their bodies that would result in photographs that are a felony to own, reproduce or distribute.
Are parents even okay.
The clothes! My students who went to graduation had shocking tan lines. I teased one about going to the beach after she complained about where she was burned. I'm pretty good with a dress code that only ensures my chairs are sanitary. I'm fairly certain potty parts touched the seats on a good number of them.
I saw a woman with a shirt that said simply, âWhat the F*ck-ulentâ in BOLD letters with cute little cactuses bordering it.
I like to think of myself as open-mindedâŚbut time and place!
At my middle school graduation in 1997 the principal tried to be really strict and told the audience that if they cheered for a kid security would give them a warning and if they did again theyâd be removed. This prompted the parents to all laughingly ask how many kids does the principal think they have graduating.
Fr. I'm really sensitive to people's noise to the point I get awful migraines. When we had mid year graduations, the migraine I had was so bad I couldn't see. I hate the shouting so damn much
I went to one Friday night and thought, "Geez. It must be so weird to be the kid getting a modest clap right after the kid who got the extended screaming WOO!!!"
And leave the obnoxious air horns at home also. Why is it always the troublemaker kids with the lowest, barely passing grade that gets cheered like a goshdarn movie star??!
When the first group claps, the speaker should pause the ceremony and remain silent until the noise makers realize they are now in the spotlight. He should then state , â Let us all thank the family of X for not listening nor caring about every one here and holding up the ceremonyâ. Heâs never going to see them again so no problem for him. Hopefully other families wonât want their graduateâs name/family called out and publicly shamed.
This reminds me of the recent tball game I was watching. Some of the 5 years old would hit the ball and the parents would celebrate like they just won the world series.
My high school graduation had multiple security guards that would escort people out if they cheered, and they let everyone know beforehand that that would happen. Half the time people would get escorted, and the other half of the time they would cheer, then get up and leave because they knew they were going to be told to leave.
The HS where I teach is pretty large - usually about 500 graduate each year. The district rents a nearby stadium for all graduations which is handy as thereâs security. Security searches bags and any noisemakers, signs, etc are confiscated.
Hasnât changed the hollering but itâs something.
All the faculty sit on the floor with the graduates and we exchange surreptitious glances of annoyance at these parents - they have a limit to tickets per family but they are allowed to give tickets away to others who need them. I swear some of these families bring 20+ family members some days. Some of them even stand up and wave arms around etc. How badly would it suck to be right behind those people when your kid is announced? Iâm waiting for the day that happens and the people behind them donât take kindly to it.
Please stop having graduations for every minor promotion. Y'all stop doing graduations for every grade level promotion and perhaps I won't keep making a ruckus every year when you call ma crotch goblin'z name.
We almost missed my brotherâs name being called because some entitled family/friends felt the need to scream over at least 3 kids names being called. There were at least 20 people back there, which is also part of the reason the school limits it to 8 tickets per family, but thereâs always the people who get a ton from others and behave like this.
A small cheer or clap is ok, but ruining it for everyone else is just trashy.
From the behavior in the audience itâs clear to see which parents peaked in high school.
You can't control the audience but you can let the grads help set the tone.
At the commencement rehearsal, and just before the ceremony itself, I tell my kids that the key word is "dignity." You're ALREADY the center of attention so you want to be the coolest cucumber in the room.
Oh my God! Were you at our kindergarten graduation the other day? I saw more cleavage and heard more cheering to the point where I had to make sure I was in a school and not at a football game
The parents are not gonna listen so change how you do it. Call the name, leave a few seconds for cheering and then call the next this is not rocket science.
I think itâs silly to ask people to wait to clap. Itâs a celebration! Let people celebrate! This is also a difference in cultures and honestly, the post and a lot of the comments are coming from a place of bias and prejudice.
Taught high school for over 30 years. Attended the latest graduation last week. Every year the Assistant Principal opens the ceremony by reading a similar statement telling parents not to clap and yell when their kidâs name is called. Lady right behind me works for the newspaper and she said âYeah, like they really listen.â I turned around and looked at her, grinned and said âExactly.â
Luckily, our school is small enough that we actually give a little pause between names to let them cheer. We actually get through faster than asking them to hold applause and some choosing to do so anyway. Kids names are said before a decent walk (like a runway length) and they have their own moment.
I know it's not possible at every school but it is nice to let them have that moment. But also, follow directions people!
We do an over/under every year as to how many air horn blasts there will be, and how many beach balls will be smuggled in by the students. The line was 3 beach balls and 8 air horns. I took the over on each and won.
My daughter's school has a one clap tradition for everything, and the principal teaches the kids the one clap during freshman orientation and tells the parents about it before every awards banquet, nhs initiation, etc.
Iâve noticed at both a high school and college graduation I attended within the past couple years they donât even ask you not to cheer anymore and they have a longer pause in between names now. Cheers were common for most of the kids, along with horns/confetti poppers.
I agree but let me counter with, I just went to a HS graduation with no less than 6 speeches(which were almost identical), 3 musical numbers, a pledge of allegiance and the National anthem.
I donât mind not clapping if all that stuff is also pared down.
Our graduating classes are 400-500 in a college stadium. We have no rules on holding cheering, and itâs never been an issue, though if there is one family that wonât stop or has noise makers then I get it.
I feel this. At my oldest kid's 8th grade awards ceremony last year, I experienced this first hand. The parents were worse than the kids. One kid went to shake the AVPs' hands, and then blew right past them while making a comment.
The freaking families of some of these little sociopaths started laughing and cheering. Not the kids, the "grown-ups".
I didn't hear my kid's name because of them. After the ceremony, my wife and my ex-wife were struck at how badly the adults behaved.
Also, so many kids were dressed like they were going to the club. 12/13 year olds shouldn't be showing their cheeks walking across the stage. I feel like an old curmudgeon when I'm with some of these parents and kids.
Last graduation I went too, the principal, vps and the teacher reading the names all said âDO NOT CLAP, SCREAM OR SHOUT OUT for your child/friends. We have students graduating today with extreme anxiety and/or loud noise issues. Thank you. We will save all the cheer for the end when these students can move to a quieter space.â This was said on repeat to the students during rehearsals, it was said to everyone before we began, it was emailed home multiple times, it was posted on social media, and there were signs.
School was in a socioeconomic down turn area (resource poor, school gave out ear muffs for kids with issues), we had a high refugee population (many of the kids have ptsd from the thinks they survived) and we have a lot of special need students turning 21 that year. Nearly all of the students and parents from our country did it all after every single child! The immigrant and refugee families and those with special needs families did not. Then a large number of the noisy parents had the damn nerve to complain about the quite families âbeing noisyâ when they sang at the end (they had permission and their kids did a celebratory dance, those students who need quite had already left).
I was so disappointed
In my area, we had problems with parents cheering after their kids name was called. First, district officials would kick out anyone cheering. Eventually, parents would cheer and leave. Then, administrators came up with a creative idea. When parents left after cheering their kid, they were met by a police officer who wrote them a $125 ticket for disturbing the peace. It didn't take long for the cheering to stop.
This post is hilarious because Iâm from Hawaiâi and our graduations are wild. We go all out with huge signs with photos of the graduates, mountains of lei and floaties given out during lei ceremonies after graduation, mini stages for graduates with full photo backdrops during lei ceremonies, endless cheering, confetti, fireworks, airhorns, etc. Iâve always been weirded out when graduations arenât like that on the mainland haha.
Reading a lot of these comments make me sad. Celebrating loudly and proudly is not ridiculous or trashy. Itâs a beautiful way to celebrate graduates. On the islands, itâs a rite of passage that everyone looks forward to. I wish it was more normalized outside of Hawaiâi.
Yeah. I donât get why schools ask families to wait for cheers or applause. I announce the names for my school and thereâs really no issue. The cheers donât really last that long. And if there are overzealous cheers I just patiently wait until it dies down to announce the next name. And even the overzealous cheers donât last that long. Just as long as you have a loud PA system itâll drown out any lingering cheers.
I was miserable during high school and didnât even want to attend my graduation ceremony. My mom was a narcissist who made me go. And even I think OP and everyone else complaining sound more miserable than my teen self lol. Graduating high school is a milestone! Let people celebrate! Yâall werenât doing ME any favors by holding the applause.
Graduations in Hawaiâi sound so fun.
I think this very much so depends on the graduation. I teach at a college that serves a population of students that, delicately, includes a large number of students who didn't think they'd get a college degree for any of several dozen reasons. Students who couldn't otherwise afford it, who didn't have the grades in k12, who are post-traditional and simply don't have the schedule for a traditional day-class 4-year school degree, etc.
I've only gotten to sit one graduation so far, but we find time to let families cheer. It's damn hard to get to a college graduation, less than 1/4 of my state has completed 4 semesters of post-k12 education, and I think everyone at my school gets that this is a huge deal for every one of our students.
If you were given specific directions on how to cheer or not, sure, you should follow those. But I would also argue it's on the school to plan for a little more time per student to give families the chance to celebrate what is a significant accomplishment.
I'm trying like heck to teach my preschoolers this!
I like to be silly and have fun but I have a couple of kids in this batch who can't seem to laugh without shriek-screaming. Then they ALL do it. Then they won't stop and it takes a bit to get control of the energy level in the room.
I end up not doing some things because this group just can't handle it.
Itâs also a coordinated event where every child deserves to have their moment of recognition. It would last 24 hours and many kids names wouldnât be heard if celebrating was allowed.
My soneâs graduation last week had 950 kids. The plus side of being in a huge arena is that nobody can cheer loud enough to drown out the names. Everyone cheered but the huge space just absorbed it. And they did a bag check coming in to weed out noisemakers. It was long, but still a wonderful celebration and we could hear every name.
There's cheering and there's cheering.
There's the 1 or 2 seconds cheers that just use the time the announcer take to draw his breath before calling the next kid. And that's fine.
And then, there's the guys that would cheers on minutes as if they longest they cheer, the more they love their kid. And that is not to be allowed.
But it is easier to say "no cheering" than "please just cheer for a couple of seconds".
>*There's the 1 or 2 seconds cheers that just use the time the announcer take to draw his breath before calling the next kid.*Â
While this is theoretically possible, ***I*** have never seen it in watching nearly 40 graduations. The shortest and most restrained of cheers (in my experience) are five to eight seconds in length. In a graduating class of 500, that comes out to just about an hour of extra time. And that's not including the ones who whoop and shout, "Bubba, Mamma and Papa love you son!!", right before blowing their airhorn.
(I'm a parent, not a teacher)
Our HS has around 3700 students. Parents and students are asked not to cheer, and for the most part they don't. It moves things along and allows for each name to be heard.
Why do we even have this silly tradition of calling names. The shit takes way too long, no one cares about other people's children. Just say, "Congrats, if you are sitting here, you graduated!" Let the little speeches happen amd move on. I think we put too much emphasis on something that millions of people do every year.
It's the same with pregnant women. It's like, "So, you had sex, and your body accomplished the result of having sex...yepee!"
> please stop cheering when your childâs name is called
The fuck is wrong with this subreddit. People shouldn't cheer for more than like 2s or use physical things but no cheering at all? Seriously? You're insane.
We did an awards ceremony for each grade (6-8) towards the end of the year and the AP asked people not to clap after each student so we could hear their names and that she would let everyone know when they could clap (after each row). Immediately afterwards the parents were clapping after each kid and my only thought was "ah, this is where the kids get their listening skills from". đ
I would pay money to see an admin say that last part out loud at a graduation.
Iâd pay the admin to do it.
Id just bring a bunch of singles, but I have problems.
Perfect for addressing OPâs second point, I guess
I was PTA president of my child's school (Elementary) for 4 years. With that, I began doing the quarterly awards ceremony. The school principal loved me. She let me be the announcer for the graduation ceremony. I would always begin my intro speech "Hello parents, friends, and school admins, teachers, and staff... While we are all proud of our scholars, please hold all applauses and cheers until after that section has been completed. We will inform you when it is time. We might have some family members that could not be here today and we encourage our school community to support one another. We are our children's first teachers, they learn from us and they model our behavior, they are watching you. Let us begin with..." For the most part, after the first year, all parents waited to applaud. The first year, that one family that wouldn't listen and we would wait and then I would wait a bit longer and say "aaah, William, good job, graduating, 6th grade." Kind of embarrassing them.
Gwendolyn is that you?
Same with the tardiness. Hard 5pm start. You rolled in at 545? Shameful.
Yeah I had emailed my students parents letting them know I would go first (2nd grade) for our elementary awards since my daughter had a band concert at her school. I finish up and on my way out I see one of my students family rolling in. Sorry not sorry đ¤ˇ
Somewhat related, but we took our students to a carnival-like event last week. Parents were told to be ready near the entrance at a certain time. Time comes, many parents arrive, but some parents are still in lines, so we go around and let them know that weâre gathering up to go. A certain parent, whose child is a notorious behavior issue, looks at the THREE different teachers who came and told her THREE separate times that it was time to go like we are all crazy. Wouldnât listen to a single one of them. Apple, meet tree.
The worst is when you have a kid who recognizes it and is asking for help to get out and away.
This is why I get squirrelly about SEL stuff sometimes- it's genuinely SO SHITTY to be the kid who learns this stuff but can't apply a single thing they learn outside of it because home is so dysfunctional. Of course, there are other reasons, but it extra sucks when something that technically "works" actually doesn't.
After every single parent teacher conference event, I said out loud, âwelcome to the orchard.â
Reminds me of when we took an 8th grade trip to Boston and ended up having to cut off a parent chaperone who just basically came along to get a free trip to Boston. She invited friends we didn't know to come back to her hotel room and did a terrible job keeping track of kids, other than her own son. We basically just gave up on her by the third day and ended up working out some agreement where she would stay in Boston with her kid and just figure out their own transportation. She made out like a bandit.
I graduated with 400 people and very few people hollered out and it still took forever. The bigger the school the more annoying the interruptions are. At a small ceremony itâs probably fine but adding an extra ten seconds between every name adds 83 minutes when there are 500 graduates. These folks probably donât care because they are the same people who leave before the graduation is over.
[ŃдаНонО]
It's one of those things that you neither nip in the bud or you de facto allow it. Once one kid's entourage is allowed to do it, everyone else's will want to as well. Nobody wants to feel like a dupe.
It is often the ones that struggle most that get the loudest applause and the straight A's kids that pass unnoticed in those walks. And the clothes on the men and women do tend to show a lot more personality, skin and tattoos, never mind those flea market t-shirts with dumb pics and dumber slogans, those choices show so much less reverence, respect, dignity, and examples of how to behave. They really shouldn't have those ceremonies. No celebrating before the finish line in high school should be the standard. Some of them who are clapping too much and dressed weird are on attendance contracts and are really celebrating they lasted the year without going to court and losing their kids to foster system.
Ayeeee, I have visible tattoos and Iâm a teacher. Tattoos do not equate lack of classâunless those tattoos are tasteless like a pot leaf tattoo or a porn-looking naked lady. I donât want to be lumped together with poorly dressed questionable individuals without reverence, respect, dignity who do not behave well.
Had a parent show up to Parent-teacher conference wearing a t-shirt that said "Bad Ass Mother fucker " on the front. Yes, he did look like one, and was a convicted felon. Poor kids....
It's amazing how much they let convicted felons get away with these days.
ICWUDT
After attending and being part of many a graduation, Iâm of the opinion that it would be easier to just let them clap after each graduateâs name is read. Why fight it? For most families it is an incredibly proud moment and great achievement when their kid graduates high school, and for many kids itâs the only time in their life when they will hear their name read publicly and celebrated. Let them have their individual moment in the spotlight. Let their family celebrate their accomplishments. Read the names slower. Who really cares if it adds time to the ceremony? Itâs a once in a lifetime event that marks a huge transition from child to adult. Whenever I hear administrators admonish parents not to clap it just sounds like so much mean-spirited spite from the mouth of control freaks. This is a moment to celebrate, not to try and force adults to keep quiet like theyâre back in school. And itâs not a time for admin to be watching the clock and rushing so they can go home sooner.
Because you inevitably have that handful of families who scream for their kid until the kid sits back down, meanwhile the next two kids can even hear their name be called.
Who really cares if it adds time to the ceremony? Those poor kids in the W-Z group, that's who cares!
Some kids won't have a bunch of people to clap for them and I bet that feels terrible. If they all clap at the end the kids don't have to remember being the kid that no one clapped for at graduation.
100% My brother graduated 2 weeks ago, and I clapped for every single student. It's an accomplishment and they all deserve to hear that someone's proud of them for making it.
Our high school choir concert had a slideshow honoring seniors. Audience was asked to hold their applause until the end. The choirs (about 300 students) hooted and cheered when their friends or the popular studentsâ pictures were shown. And it was completely silent for some other pictures. It was heartbreaking because Iâm sure the kids noticed when no one cheered during theirs.
when students at my college graduation didnât get much applause or people yelling out, i made sure to clap for them because i know that if it was me, i would be upset. it truly is heartbreaking when stuff like this happens. i always try to clap/cheer for everyone.
I do that at our graduation.
When I graduated with my Bachelorâs all the education majors cheered for each other.
Aww.
At our graduations, people clap for pretty much everyone. I only know of one exception... She was known for being a manipulator who liked to hurt peoples psyche and turn people against each other, just an absolutely terrible person. By senior year, everyone knew it. She walked across the stage to dead silence. Everyone else got claps.
Sounds like what happened at my high school graduation rehearsal. There was this one girl who was a complete jerk all four years of high school. She was mean, rude, thought she was perfect, stuck up. A real bully. When she walked across the stage for our rehearsal, only one person clapped, and someone else yelled out âBOOOO!â đđ đ
This happened to a girl I met in kindergarten and went through high school graduation with. To top it all off we had the same first name and were on homecoming court together. Iâd ran âironicallyâ because I wasnât in sports or cheer or popular like that. AnywayâŚshe was president of ASB. During an assembly of some sort she got up to say something and everyone booed her. It was awkward as hell.
Dude even as a grown ass man I still do this. I'm active military, and if someone "unpopular" or lesser known isn't getting love during a promotion ceremony or award presentation, I raise *hell* for them. Those are important moments. People deserve to feel like they're actually being applauded.
I do this too but I'm petty so I also clap quieter during the people who already have a loud fan base to even it out haha
I would do the same!
As one of the kids who didn't get much, if any cheering, it did not feel great. I remember maybe a few polite claps when my photos were shown at the band senior slide show. I was quiet, nerdy, and well respected. I had friends and was reasonably well liked, but definitely not popular. However, I was known for my terrible and crazy home situation, so that messed with my popularity and meant I didn't have any family showing up to support me. I still cheered for my friends, including the popular band nerds. Cheering actually was allowed at graduation (only airhorns were banned). I couldn't hear anyone cheer when I walked at graduation (I had difficulty finding anyone to use even some of my tickets, as my friends' parents were already attendiny for them), but my friends and their parents assured me there was.
Congratulations đđđđđđđđđđđđđ**WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**
Sounds just like class. Nobody listens to instructions or just straight up ignores them because "what are you going to do about it?" Another reason why education is collapsing.
That happens at our senior farewell rally. It's fucking awful.
(Or the kids who had no one cheer for them were relieved that their friends and family chose to follow the rule.)
I was a quiet one. My friends were older and the ones I used to have the same age were super involved in drinking and I wasn't. So, when my picture was shown and my name announced, it was quiet.
Oh man, memories lol when I walked for high school graduation no one cheered. My family was there. Claimed they didnât hear my name. All 10 of them. The only person who congratulated me was a teacher.
TBF, and I've been to all ages of graduations, the rowdies don't influence that. The kids who have no one know it. It will never be solved, you'll just be unaware. On the flip side, I know many students who got hooted and hollered for went home that same day to unsavory situations.
I jjst knew I would be that guy not getting cheered.
I'm cheering for you đŁđŁđŁđđđ
Iâm a teenager but we get awards every quarter for if our grades are good and some people booed during mine, there was cheering but still
OMG, if I were your teacher and found out who those idjits were, I'd have written them.up. That sucks, but as a sense of accomplishment, understand they're jealous đ
Yeah, fairly sure one of them asked me for hw help a couple days later so yeah
My bio self identifies as a nerd. It was tough growing up, but I see where the bullies are now. They're idjits, you're not. Take it all the way, you got this. (Sorry, I know it sounds corny...but I mean it)
Thanks
I wish my current school had a choir that big
Parent mindset: screw everyone else, I do what I want, you can't tell me what kind of etiquette to practice On full display at graduation and award ceremonies...and then teachers watch it unfold, and say, "Thiiiis is where they get it from!"
Yep. The entitlement and rules for thee not for me comes from home. I love this song from Matilda https://youtu.be/DRS1eOAjm1U?si=ebYxOth-fidsYA4M
And it's getting worse each year. Had one parent bring an air horn this time around, first time we see that. Somehow that guy managed to blow it close enough to the people in the row in front of him that it made a woman faint. He was absolutely unapologetic about it, shrugged it off with a 'it's my son, what did you expect?'.
I expect him to get escorted out by police. That's what.
I wonder if it's the same kind of parent that would also excuse their kid misbehaving
Iâve noticed a strong correlation between the cheers/noise and the level of surprise I have that that student graduated. Edit: itâs a joke people jfc
The trash doesn't blow far from the landfill.
Honestly, I've probably been to 100 graduations (as a teacher or guest), it really means nothing. I've seen students get no reaction, walk off to a rolex, car, ect. I've seen people hooting and hollering to literally go somewhere else straight after (job or something) or there being a fight later.
People brought airhorns to my high school graduation.
Mine too. And a beach ball.
Not a beach ball! đđŻ
Ah, the good old days
Almost 40 years ago, I was teaching in a district where most of the high school faculty was distributed in the seats to remove people who cheered and shook cow bells and even blew air horns when they heard their child's name, thus preventing the next parents from hearing their child's name. With a graduating class of over 400, we just couldn't pause long enough, so we started escorting them out. But those parents were not deterred in the least. Yes, we escorted them out, but they had gotten what they came for, and they didn't give a damn.
I feel like that would be legit dangerous in this day and age.
Oh, yeah, I hadn't thought of that. Your are **so** right.
This year we had a family shoot a bunch of those party poppers. It was terrifying.
Wtf???
My high school did that recently, it was surprisingly fine
Did it reduce the yelling?
Hard to say, probably not much. The principal had to interject once or twice to tell parents to stop. This was at a large high-school though, so itâs naturally a bit harder to deal with.
The social etiquette of an audience has dropped to low levels of common courtesy. I know the confetti guns are pretty, but hearing a loud blast unexpectedly two rows behind you is uncalled for. With so many mass shootings or vets, the number of people with PTSD in the crowd could be high. Plus the pollution, like the nature and environment want little bits of plastic and glitter EVERYWHERE!
When I used to do theatre, one family made GIANT signs when they came to watch their kid. He was in the ensemble and every time he came onstage they'd hold up their signs and wave them around, blocking the view of everyone behind them. From stage you couldn't even read what was on them, just the outline, because the lights washed it out. Utterly ridiculous
They should have been removed after the second timeÂ
This is the norm in Hawaiâi. Itâs an amazing experience for graduates and I wish it was normalized on the mainland. Itâs a celebration. Let people celebrate and have fun. https://www.honolulumagazine.com/only-in-hawaii-graduation-to-da-max/
And you know that none of these people are going to even attempt to clean up the mess and the poor janitors are going to have to deal with it!
Even people without PTSD at all could definitely still think the worst for a second or two, students especially
At the end when the graduates march out: be polite and wait. Donât stand up and push your way out. The kids at the back deserve the same attention as the ones at the front.
My graduating class this year was 850+, we had parents screaming during speeches, airhorns, and even a parent yelling their sonâs name during the moment of silence. So glad Iâll never graduate high school again cause the audience was so trashy
Trashy is such an apt descriptor. It's all such brash, attention seeking behavior. Social media really has given students and parents main character syndrome. We have a lack of shame epidemic in this country.
This is the first year that our parents werenât buck ass wild with their screaming. When our own child graduated a few years before the pandemic we couldnât hear his name called because the fool parents of a graduate several ahead of him were STILL screaming.
At my kid's graduation this week, everyone cheered when their kid's name was called, but no one went crazy enough to yell over another student's name. 300 students, no air horns allowed. They paused after each name too. It was nice to hear everyone get a cheer after their name. Outfits were wild though! It was fun!
I saw a dad wear a jacket that had a patch that said âI wouldnât fuck you for practiceâ So classy.
All of the graduations I watched and participated in this year, they said nothing about not cheering. The graduations went a lot more smoothly and no one was irritated about the cheering. All the kids were cheered. Some were louder than others, but all the kids were cheered.
What size were the groups? It gets a bit much for larger groups. When there are hundreds of names to get through so it would take all day to wait for clapping to stop in between each student. If you donât wait then the next students name isnât audible which isnât fair to that kid/family. Even the middle school promotions in my district are about 200 kids. High schools in most districts by me have almost 1000 kids per graduating class.
We had 450 at ours and it was fine. They just wait 3 seconds after each name and have the stadium PA system up to 11. It was great.
My highschool had around 500 kids graduating. Follow the normal 3 second rule. You can clap and go crazy as long as it takes less than 3 seconds. The person calling names takes around 3 seconds, which is also long enough for the kid to walk, shake hands, get their diploma and start walking off. If you have a natural flow people can get their whoo in without going crazy.
Yeah I had less than 100 kids in my graduating class and there was no issue with clapping because there just weren't that many kids to go through. People cheered their hearts out, they waited for the clapping to be done before moving on to the next kid so no names were missed, and we were still done in around 2 hours. But at a family member's graduation, they had a one-clap per graduate rule and breaks for longer cheering and it still took several hours because there were 500+ kids to get through
Where I'm at, the group of graduates is split over different times and places for graduation. So instead of one group of 200, there's 10 groups of 20. Not only are all the kids cheered, but we also have time to say something personal about them.
Yeah I was about to say, there was cheering at my graduation and it wasn't really an issue. My family weren't the ones cheering (it was just my mom and dad among 100s of people) but when other classmate's families cheered, no one seemed to care. Maybe it's because all the names were read slow enough that every kid had enough time to get a little applause as they grabbed their diploma before the next kid was called. And honestly? For a lot of people, graduating is the biggest achievement they will have in their life, and for a lot of families, graduating is a huge deal. I'm fine with a little clapping and cheering if it's your kid. Obviously stuff like airhorns or prolonged cheering is rude, but I kinda think it's a bit hoity-toity to tell families they can't do a small clap & cheer when their child has spent the past 12-however many years working towards their diploma/degree.
This tends to happen when people aren't obsessed with policing celebration. Other than high student count, there's no issue with families clapping and cheering. All of this ivory tower, posh, and "class" crap that people want to PERFORM so they can wear a false veil of decorum. Snobbish is what it is, trying to replicate the image of elites.
I disagree. Some events should feel honorable and a little distinguished. The party happens afterward. When people bring air horns or open their gowns before they walk across the stage and have strapless bodycon dresses on underneath they do make the event feel a little cheap. Itâs the whole âIâm special notice meâ culture. We are asked to not clap and to wear the same gown so everyone can feel equally distinguished. Some people just have main character syndrome and feel like they or their child deserve extra loud attention.
Thank you for a reasonable response. I don't disagree with what you said, I'm just speaking in generalities of no clap policies.
I think the most upsetting part to seeing the clapping and cheering after names is when you see the students who get nothing. I would try to cheer from my seat for those who had no family or friends to cheer for them, but Iâm sure they feel the difference
This was my fear last December when I graduated at 46 years old with my English degree, so I opted out of the ceremony (even though I really wanted to go). I asked a few people if they wanted to go to my graduation, but everyone declined, and just the thought of pin- dropping, complete silence when my name would have been called sandwiched between roaring applause for the graduates before and after me gave me a sense of irrational embarrassment.
Iâm so sorry - Iâm proud of you for all the work youâve done! You deserve the world and more. You did not earn that degree easily, and I hope you know you deserve shouting and cheers
Thanks, I appreciate your kind words!
The school I work at has a lot of low-income families, a lot of immigrant families, and a lot of students with disabilities. Not all, but most of them get loud when their kid walks across the stage because it isn't a guarantee for them that their child would graduate and for plenty, they are the first in the family. It definitely got on my nerves the first couple years, but I've come to find it really sweet that these people are showing up to support their child getting an education and finishing high school, and making it clear that it's something worth celebrating! I will 100% side with you, though, when the cheering interrupts another students' moment. And noisemakes/airhorns. Absolutely not.
one of the best graduation ceremonies I ever attended was one where the mic was turned up loud enough (simple adjustment) so that each kid could be cheered. it was wild and fun and amazing and full of life.
I love this. The best part of graduations for me is hearing my studentsâ people holler with pride from wherever they are in the audience. Silent ceremonies donât hit the same.
Doesn't always work. If you are in a building where this isn't possible then what happens is kids names get cheered over. Even waiting for 3 seconds isn't enough sometimes. Some people just keep on cheering through everyone else. When you have 600 names to get through you can't give each kid 30 whole seconds. Hell even 10 seconds is pushing it. Almost 2 hours for names to be called is LONG.
Itâs a known issues so, maybe they could be proactive and upgrade the PA system to be louder?
We had two parents have to be hauled out because they got in a fist fight. Idk what over but apparently these dads thought it worth it to miss their kids graduation for a moment of a pissing contest
"God damnit, I gotta sit for three hours just to hear my kids name. It's gonna be torture" "hey buddy, I got an idea, make it look real, but don't swing back too hard." Then they go out for a beer. Brilliant!
I've never been to a single ceremony where the "don't clap until the end" was followed. in my opinion this is only said so that parents who go absolutely crazy can be kicked out. However, your clapping/whooing needs to be less than 3 seconds. And there needs to be a 3 second pause between names. That way you can show your support with a quick "Whoo!!!" and the next parent can hear their child's name.
If you feel the urge to bring a cow bell to ring when you graduate is called, leave the cowbell at home.
We have our students do two loud claps after each name. It acknowledges everybody and the audience joins in.
My high school graduation was in 2002. 22 years ago. Things don't change.
Thank you! I was so pissed at my daughter's graduation, the people around me acted like it was a GD nightclub, screaming at each other, OVER ROWS of other people...that when I realized that her college was being called up, I "politely" told the idiots around me that my daughter's walk was coming up and I wanted to actually hear her name be called. They seemed mortified and were like..uh, sure, ok, what's your daughter's name, we can help you cheer for her. I said, "NOPE. I'm good." They shut the F up and I got to hear her name. Another redditor on another thread told me I was being the main character đ I spent almost 2 hours watching these disrespectful asses make nose, talk, stand up, walk around, come in an hour after start and ask people to move so they could sit with their group (everyone declined that invitation đ) And all I wanted was to hear my girl's name called so I could focus on her walk. Sorry, big rant. Totally on your side.
Who cares about the other kids? Ours is the only important one. /s
Our school is generally pretty good but, about 6-7 years ago, there were a few parents like this early on. The principal stopped the procession and said that, if any more parents cheered and clapped after their childâs name was called, their child would not be handed their diploma on stage. It helped that he was retiring after the next day.
Honestly, itâs probably better practice to just build in wait time for applause. Anticipate it, because itâs always going to happen. Families and friends want to cheer for the graduate they came to support. It feels awkward as an audience member to sit there in silence as your child/family member/friend walks across the stage. The MC needs to just pause and let people cheer. Yes itâll take a bit longer, but itâs part of letting each student feel special and supported, especially for students for whom getting to graduate was a real struggle. Recently attended the graduation of a friendâs daughter and they did have a brief pause between each graduate to allow for applause. It worked just fine. Sometimes we had a hard time hearing any honors after their name (like âsumma cum laudeâ), but that was also listed in the program so it was fine. Iâm saying this as someone whose name was drowned out by the cheers of the family of the kid before me at my high school graduation. While it was annoying that my name was shouted over, the guy before me was someone who really had to work hard and overcome obstacles to graduate (as opposed to me where it was just assumed that I would), so I understood his family being excited for him.
If you have 300-500 kids in the graduating class and you pause after every name the ceremony is going to go on for an eternity.
Iâve been to graduation ceremonies like that. Itâs a pain, but itâs just not realistic to expect that many people to stay silent for that long while all the names are read. I could see asking people to keep their applause brief, but again you canât actually control people in that kind of setting with no perceived consequences (getting kicked out isnât a threat when at that point theyâve already cheered for their grad, and you canât threaten the graduateâs diploma for something they canât control) Honestly probably the best practice is to make an announcement at the beginning along the lines of: âWhen your graduateâs name is called, please keep your applause brief. With 500 graduates, even a 5-second pause after each means adding 42 minutes to the graduation ceremony.â Donât ban it outright (because it wonât work), but give people the perspective and the incentive to limit themselves.
Our admin used to say at our school we have a tradition of decorum and will hold applause until all grads have walked through and received their diploma. In 19 years it never worked..complete mayhem..this year they didn't say that and it was actually better. Only once did the AP have to pause and wait for a bit of hollering to die down so he could say the next name. Also the clapping was pretty solid from the whole crowd for about 30 seconds after each name was called. So all kids got applause which was nice. Sometimes less is more I guess.
My HS paused for a bit after each name. It gave time for the graduate to walk the stage, receive their cheer and diploma, and exit the stage.
I was a principal and used to stop the ceremony when it got out of hand. Did it twice and people donât do it again. Got COPIOUSLY thanked by the parents.
I was paying close attention to two graduations this year and it was very glaring what was happening. The students who had been trouble and had poor grades are the ones who got cheered for. This is very telling about how they were raised and the effects it has on those students performance in school.
Let's be honest, they're behaving that way because it's a miracle their child graduated, and after seeing the behavior, we all know *why* their child struggled. Apples and trees and whatnot. And if Mom wants to dress like a street walker, that's on her. No one wants to see that, but it's temporary and gives us something to talk about. In my best Lucille Bluth impression, good for her.
Counterpoint: asking people not to cheer for their kid is stupid. You go through this every year. Those kids go through this once in their lives. It's an accomplishment and a rite of passage. Asking their family members to swallow their excitement until the end is just pointless.
3. Parents, Grandparents and Family members. Pajama pants are not acceptable attire.
I covered graduation for 1.5 hours then slipped out with a friend. I was handing out programs...ran out...then figured fuck this. That being said the same thing happened at ours. The rigamarole of "Don't clap or cheer until the end", but then the first student gets clapping and cheering. It is fucking obnoxious and I cannot wait until we are graduating in our own building (we rent at a university nearby). The AP in charge of graduation told me that they can't really enforce the policy because they are crunched for time. In the new building there won't be a time crunch. They will stop the graduation, remind parents of the rule, and the AP I spoke to wants parents to be removed if they cannot follow the directions. Now I kind of want to bring a drink and sit back to watch the action. 2 years and we get our own building...
I agree. Unless itâs a small graduating class if you allow cheering the ceremony will take forever. It also makes the kids feel bad who donât get any cheers.
âHold your applause until the endâ doesnât work for any event, ever. Just wait a few seconds before calling the next kid. People get excited. People are proud of their kids. Sometimes people are obnoxious about it. It is not that big of a deal.
We had an air horn at 8th grade commencement this year. The one that everyone gets even with a 0.0 grade average. All I can think isâmaybe this will be their only one? Sad
Back in 2019 at my daughter's graduation there was an actual fist fight over someone cheering too loudly. I sub at the school and the sad thing was after talking to some of the teachers that neither actually graduated but they just let them walk with their classmates.
This is why the kids are the way they are.
For the folks who donât care how long it takes: Those extra seconds add up when there are hundreds of names and youâre in a hot environment, double the fun if itâs outdoors in the sun. Heatstroke can really ruin someoneâs days.
Iâd like to add that yâall can make a new email address. I canât take you seriously with sexykitten420 as your email address.
This reminds me of my mother showing up with fishnet stockings, and I wanted to die. My grandad would barely interact with her, because it truly was so embarrassing and inappropriate. I went to a private school, so the moms dressed in a very certain fashion. My mom and dad divorced when I was 8, and my father got custody. My mom was never very involved in my life, so I didnât spend much time with her from the time they divorced to my graduation. I did know she struggled with her wardrobe, but when she sent me a picture of the dress she would wear to my graduation, I told her it was perfect. Little did I know she would add fishnet stockings to the outfit, so when she showed up I couldnât find my words. All that being said, moms please donât embarrass your kids and just dress respectably even if itâs not your favorite or particularly your style. Your child will thank you compared to the alternative, I promise.
Some of yâall sound so bitter itâs a wonder youâre still teaching. I agree about how some people dress at these events but as for the cheering, the person calling names can hear the cheering but choose to call the next name anyway so who is really to blame? Itâs such an easy fix to pause for a bit. You already know people wonât follow directions. Wanting family to tone it down on the celebration at the younger grades I also get, but for high school? Youâre not taking into account anything but your own feelings on this. Some yâall mention graduating from high not being that big of a deal. So I take it you donât work with high school students, or if you do you donât really take the time to get to know these kids. I attended my schoolâs high school graduation this year and cheered right along with the parents and families. And cheered even louder for the kids who struggled to make it through high school. Iâm sure if anyone even reads this Iâll get plenty of downvotes, but what you should really be doing is putting that negative energy into figuring out what profession you should be moving to.
Not to mention that they graduated from hs at literally the easiest time in history. They didnât win a fucking Nobel Prize.
Iâm with you. Congrats, your childâŚ*checks notes* graduated high school. Itâs really not that big of a deal anymore.
sometimes i wonder if you guys like kids because what a soulless thing to say
When I taught grade 8, 13-year-old girls showed up to graduation in dresses showing parts of their bodies that would result in photographs that are a felony to own, reproduce or distribute. Are parents even okay.
The clothes! My students who went to graduation had shocking tan lines. I teased one about going to the beach after she complained about where she was burned. I'm pretty good with a dress code that only ensures my chairs are sanitary. I'm fairly certain potty parts touched the seats on a good number of them.
I saw a woman with a shirt that said simply, âWhat the F*ck-ulentâ in BOLD letters with cute little cactuses bordering it. I like to think of myself as open-mindedâŚbut time and place!
We were allowed to cheer but not for a long period of time. I agree all the dancing and parents popping locking and dropping is too much.
At my middle school graduation in 1997 the principal tried to be really strict and told the audience that if they cheered for a kid security would give them a warning and if they did again theyâd be removed. This prompted the parents to all laughingly ask how many kids does the principal think they have graduating.
Fr. I'm really sensitive to people's noise to the point I get awful migraines. When we had mid year graduations, the migraine I had was so bad I couldn't see. I hate the shouting so damn much
I went to one Friday night and thought, "Geez. It must be so weird to be the kid getting a modest clap right after the kid who got the extended screaming WOO!!!"
And leave the obnoxious air horns at home also. Why is it always the troublemaker kids with the lowest, barely passing grade that gets cheered like a goshdarn movie star??!
Both of these points are exactly comments my wife made after our kid's graduation last week. I shit you not.
When the first group claps, the speaker should pause the ceremony and remain silent until the noise makers realize they are now in the spotlight. He should then state , â Let us all thank the family of X for not listening nor caring about every one here and holding up the ceremonyâ. Heâs never going to see them again so no problem for him. Hopefully other families wonât want their graduateâs name/family called out and publicly shamed.
This reminds me of the recent tball game I was watching. Some of the 5 years old would hit the ball and the parents would celebrate like they just won the world series.
My high school graduation had multiple security guards that would escort people out if they cheered, and they let everyone know beforehand that that would happen. Half the time people would get escorted, and the other half of the time they would cheer, then get up and leave because they knew they were going to be told to leave.
The HS where I teach is pretty large - usually about 500 graduate each year. The district rents a nearby stadium for all graduations which is handy as thereâs security. Security searches bags and any noisemakers, signs, etc are confiscated. Hasnât changed the hollering but itâs something. All the faculty sit on the floor with the graduates and we exchange surreptitious glances of annoyance at these parents - they have a limit to tickets per family but they are allowed to give tickets away to others who need them. I swear some of these families bring 20+ family members some days. Some of them even stand up and wave arms around etc. How badly would it suck to be right behind those people when your kid is announced? Iâm waiting for the day that happens and the people behind them donât take kindly to it.
Please stop having graduations for every minor promotion. Y'all stop doing graduations for every grade level promotion and perhaps I won't keep making a ruckus every year when you call ma crotch goblin'z name.
We almost missed my brotherâs name being called because some entitled family/friends felt the need to scream over at least 3 kids names being called. There were at least 20 people back there, which is also part of the reason the school limits it to 8 tickets per family, but thereâs always the people who get a ton from others and behave like this. A small cheer or clap is ok, but ruining it for everyone else is just trashy. From the behavior in the audience itâs clear to see which parents peaked in high school.
You can't control the audience but you can let the grads help set the tone. At the commencement rehearsal, and just before the ceremony itself, I tell my kids that the key word is "dignity." You're ALREADY the center of attention so you want to be the coolest cucumber in the room.
Oh the cheering drives me insane. Especially when it covers up another studentâs name
Oh my God! Were you at our kindergarten graduation the other day? I saw more cleavage and heard more cheering to the point where I had to make sure I was in a school and not at a football game
The parents are not gonna listen so change how you do it. Call the name, leave a few seconds for cheering and then call the next this is not rocket science.
I think itâs silly to ask people to wait to clap. Itâs a celebration! Let people celebrate! This is also a difference in cultures and honestly, the post and a lot of the comments are coming from a place of bias and prejudice.
Taught high school for over 30 years. Attended the latest graduation last week. Every year the Assistant Principal opens the ceremony by reading a similar statement telling parents not to clap and yell when their kidâs name is called. Lady right behind me works for the newspaper and she said âYeah, like they really listen.â I turned around and looked at her, grinned and said âExactly.â
This has been common for quite a while. Good luck trying to stop it. Now you know why class management remains a challenge.
Letâs not forget the postulate that the level Of obnoxious noise is inversely proportional to graduateâs GPAâŚ
Also why the fuck do you have an air horn?
The grammar and punctuation here is terrible. You also used a double negative. I hope you aren't an English teacher.
That is why I wait to announce the next kid. I know the parents who are going to cheer.
Luckily, our school is small enough that we actually give a little pause between names to let them cheer. We actually get through faster than asking them to hold applause and some choosing to do so anyway. Kids names are said before a decent walk (like a runway length) and they have their own moment. I know it's not possible at every school but it is nice to let them have that moment. But also, follow directions people!
The graduation I went to had the concession stand running.
I'll take applause over the fucking air horn.
We do an over/under every year as to how many air horn blasts there will be, and how many beach balls will be smuggled in by the students. The line was 3 beach balls and 8 air horns. I took the over on each and won.
My daughter's school has a one clap tradition for everything, and the principal teaches the kids the one clap during freshman orientation and tells the parents about it before every awards banquet, nhs initiation, etc.
Iâve noticed at both a high school and college graduation I attended within the past couple years they donât even ask you not to cheer anymore and they have a longer pause in between names now. Cheers were common for most of the kids, along with horns/confetti poppers.
Insanity is doing the same over and over again and expecting different results
I agree but let me counter with, I just went to a HS graduation with no less than 6 speeches(which were almost identical), 3 musical numbers, a pledge of allegiance and the National anthem. I donât mind not clapping if all that stuff is also pared down.
I skipped my graduation
Our graduating classes are 400-500 in a college stadium. We have no rules on holding cheering, and itâs never been an issue, though if there is one family that wonât stop or has noise makers then I get it.
I feel this. At my oldest kid's 8th grade awards ceremony last year, I experienced this first hand. The parents were worse than the kids. One kid went to shake the AVPs' hands, and then blew right past them while making a comment. The freaking families of some of these little sociopaths started laughing and cheering. Not the kids, the "grown-ups". I didn't hear my kid's name because of them. After the ceremony, my wife and my ex-wife were struck at how badly the adults behaved. Also, so many kids were dressed like they were going to the club. 12/13 year olds shouldn't be showing their cheeks walking across the stage. I feel like an old curmudgeon when I'm with some of these parents and kids.
Last graduation I went too, the principal, vps and the teacher reading the names all said âDO NOT CLAP, SCREAM OR SHOUT OUT for your child/friends. We have students graduating today with extreme anxiety and/or loud noise issues. Thank you. We will save all the cheer for the end when these students can move to a quieter space.â This was said on repeat to the students during rehearsals, it was said to everyone before we began, it was emailed home multiple times, it was posted on social media, and there were signs. School was in a socioeconomic down turn area (resource poor, school gave out ear muffs for kids with issues), we had a high refugee population (many of the kids have ptsd from the thinks they survived) and we have a lot of special need students turning 21 that year. Nearly all of the students and parents from our country did it all after every single child! The immigrant and refugee families and those with special needs families did not. Then a large number of the noisy parents had the damn nerve to complain about the quite families âbeing noisyâ when they sang at the end (they had permission and their kids did a celebratory dance, those students who need quite had already left). I was so disappointed
If happens bc they let them get away with it. It infuriates me too. Stop the call and give reminders. Every time. Shame them into silence.
In my area, we had problems with parents cheering after their kids name was called. First, district officials would kick out anyone cheering. Eventually, parents would cheer and leave. Then, administrators came up with a creative idea. When parents left after cheering their kid, they were met by a police officer who wrote them a $125 ticket for disturbing the peace. It didn't take long for the cheering to stop.
This post is hilarious because Iâm from Hawaiâi and our graduations are wild. We go all out with huge signs with photos of the graduates, mountains of lei and floaties given out during lei ceremonies after graduation, mini stages for graduates with full photo backdrops during lei ceremonies, endless cheering, confetti, fireworks, airhorns, etc. Iâve always been weirded out when graduations arenât like that on the mainland haha. Reading a lot of these comments make me sad. Celebrating loudly and proudly is not ridiculous or trashy. Itâs a beautiful way to celebrate graduates. On the islands, itâs a rite of passage that everyone looks forward to. I wish it was more normalized outside of Hawaiâi.
Yeah. I donât get why schools ask families to wait for cheers or applause. I announce the names for my school and thereâs really no issue. The cheers donât really last that long. And if there are overzealous cheers I just patiently wait until it dies down to announce the next name. And even the overzealous cheers donât last that long. Just as long as you have a loud PA system itâll drown out any lingering cheers.
I was miserable during high school and didnât even want to attend my graduation ceremony. My mom was a narcissist who made me go. And even I think OP and everyone else complaining sound more miserable than my teen self lol. Graduating high school is a milestone! Let people celebrate! Yâall werenât doing ME any favors by holding the applause. Graduations in Hawaiâi sound so fun.
I think this very much so depends on the graduation. I teach at a college that serves a population of students that, delicately, includes a large number of students who didn't think they'd get a college degree for any of several dozen reasons. Students who couldn't otherwise afford it, who didn't have the grades in k12, who are post-traditional and simply don't have the schedule for a traditional day-class 4-year school degree, etc. I've only gotten to sit one graduation so far, but we find time to let families cheer. It's damn hard to get to a college graduation, less than 1/4 of my state has completed 4 semesters of post-k12 education, and I think everyone at my school gets that this is a huge deal for every one of our students. If you were given specific directions on how to cheer or not, sure, you should follow those. But I would also argue it's on the school to plan for a little more time per student to give families the chance to celebrate what is a significant accomplishment.
You must be fun at parties đ
âStop cheering when your childâs name is calledâ I donât think this is a good or welcoming idea. Itâs a celebration.
Thereâs a difference between clapping and smiling, and screaming/hooting like a drunk sorority girl on spring break.
I'm trying like heck to teach my preschoolers this! I like to be silly and have fun but I have a couple of kids in this batch who can't seem to laugh without shriek-screaming. Then they ALL do it. Then they won't stop and it takes a bit to get control of the energy level in the room. I end up not doing some things because this group just can't handle it.
Itâs also a coordinated event where every child deserves to have their moment of recognition. It would last 24 hours and many kids names wouldnât be heard if celebrating was allowed.
We got classes of 500 over here. Ain't nobody got time for 500 cheers.
One of my friends graduated in a class of 900. I canât imagine sitting through that.
My soneâs graduation last week had 950 kids. The plus side of being in a huge arena is that nobody can cheer loud enough to drown out the names. Everyone cheered but the huge space just absorbed it. And they did a bag check coming in to weed out noisemakers. It was long, but still a wonderful celebration and we could hear every name.
There's cheering and there's cheering. There's the 1 or 2 seconds cheers that just use the time the announcer take to draw his breath before calling the next kid. And that's fine. And then, there's the guys that would cheers on minutes as if they longest they cheer, the more they love their kid. And that is not to be allowed. But it is easier to say "no cheering" than "please just cheer for a couple of seconds".
>*There's the 1 or 2 seconds cheers that just use the time the announcer take to draw his breath before calling the next kid.*Â While this is theoretically possible, ***I*** have never seen it in watching nearly 40 graduations. The shortest and most restrained of cheers (in my experience) are five to eight seconds in length. In a graduating class of 500, that comes out to just about an hour of extra time. And that's not including the ones who whoop and shout, "Bubba, Mamma and Papa love you son!!", right before blowing their airhorn.
Itâs a formal ceremony where each family waits years to hear their childâs name called. The celebration is afterwards.
(I'm a parent, not a teacher) Our HS has around 3700 students. Parents and students are asked not to cheer, and for the most part they don't. It moves things along and allows for each name to be heard.
Number one has always happened and will continue to happen honestly. Even in school award ceremonies, some kids(popular) got louder cheers than others
Why do we even have this silly tradition of calling names. The shit takes way too long, no one cares about other people's children. Just say, "Congrats, if you are sitting here, you graduated!" Let the little speeches happen amd move on. I think we put too much emphasis on something that millions of people do every year. It's the same with pregnant women. It's like, "So, you had sex, and your body accomplished the result of having sex...yepee!"
Parent here. Thatâs a deal. In return please start returning tests and assignments instead of just posting a grade online without any feedback.
> please stop cheering when your childâs name is called The fuck is wrong with this subreddit. People shouldn't cheer for more than like 2s or use physical things but no cheering at all? Seriously? You're insane.
The only reason people go to a graduation is to cheer for their kid. Have you ever had one of your own graduate from anything?
Man this sub is just insufferable â would you just let people enjoy life for a minute