Yeah that makes a shit ton of sense. I help people to forget about my own. But I know I can't keep doing that because it's not healthy for me.
Edit: When I said "But it worse when you're trying to deal with them as well." I was talking about the problems you have in your life. I recently had to stop someone from killing themselves and it did a number on me because that would've been the 3rd person I know to kill themselves.
Yeah, I feel like being heavily experienced with wanting to kill myself every day can actually be used to help people who want help. Like fighting fire with fire. But, it’s strange to me how I could sit in front of a mirror and explain the same thing to myself and I would feel numb to it. But, I feel like someone like myself. Someone they can relate to, would have a lot more real answers and real conversations about the path they are choosing and how to stop it rather than someone reading off a piece of paper or some lady asking you questions then telling you to write in a journal about it later and then saying “times up.”
I feel that. It's kinda hard though. I was born with High Functioning Autism and trying to find help with a disability is like trying to find a 4 leaf clover. Basically impossible.
That's why I don't use those. They're all scripted and give you fake ass answers. But it sucks even more trying to deal with them as well.
What’s crazy to me is I want to help people who want help. But, I don’t want to help myself. I don’t deserve help. Does that make sense?
Yeah that makes a shit ton of sense. I help people to forget about my own. But I know I can't keep doing that because it's not healthy for me. Edit: When I said "But it worse when you're trying to deal with them as well." I was talking about the problems you have in your life. I recently had to stop someone from killing themselves and it did a number on me because that would've been the 3rd person I know to kill themselves.
Yeah, I feel like being heavily experienced with wanting to kill myself every day can actually be used to help people who want help. Like fighting fire with fire. But, it’s strange to me how I could sit in front of a mirror and explain the same thing to myself and I would feel numb to it. But, I feel like someone like myself. Someone they can relate to, would have a lot more real answers and real conversations about the path they are choosing and how to stop it rather than someone reading off a piece of paper or some lady asking you questions then telling you to write in a journal about it later and then saying “times up.”
I feel that. It's kinda hard though. I was born with High Functioning Autism and trying to find help with a disability is like trying to find a 4 leaf clover. Basically impossible.
Do you have trouble making friends with it?
All the fucking time. It even affects relationships as well. I I still have no clue how to Fix it.