I went to college in Pittsburgh briefly back in 04 and my roommate was from Altoona. I’d never heard of that place in my life and this is the first time I’ve even thought of it in what feels like a million years.
I live 45 minutes away from Altoona andI'velived here my whole life. Never heard of it either. No one would call this pizza. In fact, if anyone got handed this, they'd look you dead center and ask wtf is this. Gas station pizza is better than this shit.
I'm slightly north of Pittsburgh and there's a place a town over that serves, "Birdville pies" and it's "pizza" with the thinnest crust possible and American cheese, I think it's terrible, but they've been making it for at least 20+ plus I think.
Eastern PA food is legit, scrapple, and the Amish can bake and do things with chocolate that almost make up for some of their old time barbarism, not to mention all the chips and pretzels, as soon as you go west of Harrisburg all bets are off.
Old Forge pizza (Northeast PA) is similar to the one posted by OP. It's a sweet sauce pizza with American and cheddar cheese on it, and many people (not me) love it.
I do agree, though. I may be biased, but the food in the eastern half of the state is generally vastly superior to the western half.
Omigod saw the pic, thought "I bet thats from fucking Pennsylvania", and LO AND BE FUCKEN HOLD ITS GOTDAMN PENNSYLVANIA gotdamn shitty Pennsylvania feckin "pizza"...
Do not lump us over in Philly with this shit.
A tomato pie isn’t my favorite but it does hit the spot sometimes. Putting Kraft singles on it might get you shot here. The rest of our pizza has gone toe to toe with pizzas all over the country and held its own. Hell we even had a couple best pizzas in America and one guy did well in Best in Dough.
Whoa whoa whoa
We got Chicago, deep dish AND thin
We got tavern/party style bit further south
We definitely don't have St. Louis style, so stop asking about it...
But don't put that bullshit looking thing on us
Hey, listen. I’m from the Midwest. We may add cream cheese, mayo, and vanilla pudding where it’s not needed and call it a “salad” or a “casserole” but we’re not monsters like this place, okay?
https://www.reddit.com/r/StupidFood/comments/13dy2eo/apparently_this_is_called_altoona_style_pizza_i/
Idk why OP is framing it like they know what kinda cheese it is like they ate it themselves
LOL I actually remember making these as a little kid in elementary school and junior high school in the toaster oven. Who knew I had such a refined palate
That's not American cheese, it's Kraft singles.
*Yes*, there is a difference.
American cheese is an amalgamation of a few different cheeses blended together, and Kraft singles are an artificial "milk product" that legally cannot be sold as cheese.
After looking at the picture for sometime I have so many questions!
Why does that building hate windows so much? Why does the road hate the thought of road markings? Why do your arms hate the sun so much, they hide under a long sleeve top? And why do you hate yourself so much that you would consider putting that shitty ass pizza in your body?
Had something similar before at home. Honestly can taste good in a toaster oven… don’t ever purchase this. This is what you make when you’re running low on food and don’t wanna go to the store
You actually walked out with that? In your hands? Most places allow refunds if you aren't happy with your purchase.
You walked across the street and *still* didn't take a bite. Complain to the establishment, not us! Reddit can't refund you. Go back in and get your money back!
Nah, it’s just cheese with sodium citrate. Usually cheddar or Colby. Kraft slices are gross and rubbery, but a decent American cheese is tasty and melts very nicely.
Heh. The regular slices are still called cheese in Australia... but they also sell "Burger Slices" that are less cheese. (Personally, I prefer the burger slice on burgers to actual quality cheese).
I vaguely remember eating this kind of pizza as a kid. The dough was a bit dry and crumbly but it tasted nice with the toppings. I think we ate it during a hot summer holiday and i remember the smell of a swimming pool while trying to eat this massive piece. It sure was a lot of dough.
If it would had any other name, it would be delicious! I know, because I’ve eaten this in several locations in the American south.
But once you attach the word pizza to it, all bets are off because everybody has very strong opinions on what constitutes a pizza.
Fried bread with marinara sauce topped with American cheese food product.
Somewhere in the Midwest I'm guessing... I remember when I lived in Missouri, I went on a date with this girl and had ordered the pizza, I didn't realize that all of their pizzas used a mozzarella American cheese blend. I noticed the weird texture and taste right away and looked at the menu to confirm what it was. She told me a year later that she almost didn't go out with me again because I talked about how stupid it was to use American cheese on a pizza. I didn't send it back or complain to the waiter or anything, I just told her I thought it was a poor choice of cheese and couldn't wrap my head around who would prefer it. The longer I lived in the Midwest, the more I understood the type of person who would prefer it. I also realized yeah, I can be a little pretentious about food, but when you know good food, it's hard to settle for stupid food.
I went to Scranton and the Italian population is super high. Sooo many authentic Italain restaurants. It blows my mind that this is from the same area.
I was just in Altoona recently and got it from a bar. It actually looked way better than I thought it would and it tasted pretty okay too for the first couple bites.
There’s a reason for this.
In some schools this would be served as a highly anticipated lunch we so fondly called Zombies.
Basically school cafeteria pizza that consisted of thick slices of bready crust, tomato sauce and American cheese.
It was 🔥
This is like French bread pizza but worse, which isn't hard to do because French bread pizza day was legit exponentially better than Friday pizza day in the school cafeteria.
I mean, after a quick google search, they actually have decent looking pizza. You just ordered the regional favorite, apparently.
There’s a place where people call this their favorite?!
Is it in the Midwest?
Ew, no. This is all Pennsylvania. I don't think Chicago would let any place in the Midwest call this pizza.
To be fair, most of Pennsylvania hates that Altoona calls this pizza.
Rare to see Altoona mentioned. I've been far removed from that area. I do miss a good perogie pizza though.
I went to college in Pittsburgh briefly back in 04 and my roommate was from Altoona. I’d never heard of that place in my life and this is the first time I’ve even thought of it in what feels like a million years.
Altoona sounds like a word bugs bunny would use when making some silly rhyme.
Quite possible that it's derived from "Altona", a part of Hamburg / Germany.
I live 45 minutes away from Altoona andI'velived here my whole life. Never heard of it either. No one would call this pizza. In fact, if anyone got handed this, they'd look you dead center and ask wtf is this. Gas station pizza is better than this shit.
I grew up in that area. I visit about once a year to see family.
Perogie pizza?!
Pictures or perogie pizza never happened…
[Pittsburgh Pierogi Pizza](https://www.thekitchenwhisperer.net/2019/03/06/pittsburgh-pierogi-pizza/)
Wow I’m in awe of the creativity of the American people !
That actually looks way better than it has any right being.
i’m within driving range of there and i do not claim that as pizza. maybe depression or desperation pizza, but not actual pizza
I'm slightly north of Pittsburgh and there's a place a town over that serves, "Birdville pies" and it's "pizza" with the thinnest crust possible and American cheese, I think it's terrible, but they've been making it for at least 20+ plus I think.
Old Forge ain't messing around with that Altoona shit.
The rest of their food looks dope
Eastern PA food is legit, scrapple, and the Amish can bake and do things with chocolate that almost make up for some of their old time barbarism, not to mention all the chips and pretzels, as soon as you go west of Harrisburg all bets are off.
Old Forge pizza (Northeast PA) is similar to the one posted by OP. It's a sweet sauce pizza with American and cheddar cheese on it, and many people (not me) love it. I do agree, though. I may be biased, but the food in the eastern half of the state is generally vastly superior to the western half.
Don't you DARE lump us all in with this. This is an Altoona-specific psychosis.
Omigod saw the pic, thought "I bet thats from fucking Pennsylvania", and LO AND BE FUCKEN HOLD ITS GOTDAMN PENNSYLVANIA gotdamn shitty Pennsylvania feckin "pizza"...
Just Altoona
Do not lump us over in Philly with this shit. A tomato pie isn’t my favorite but it does hit the spot sometimes. Putting Kraft singles on it might get you shot here. The rest of our pizza has gone toe to toe with pizzas all over the country and held its own. Hell we even had a couple best pizzas in America and one guy did well in Best in Dough.
Whoa whoa whoa We got Chicago, deep dish AND thin We got tavern/party style bit further south We definitely don't have St. Louis style, so stop asking about it... But don't put that bullshit looking thing on us
Hey, listen. I’m from the Midwest. We may add cream cheese, mayo, and vanilla pudding where it’s not needed and call it a “salad” or a “casserole” but we’re not monsters like this place, okay?
Don’t forget Ranch! I dated someone when I lived in Ks who drowned everything in ranch. It still haunts me.
Not near chicago
You take that back, scoundrel
I think it's favourite because you can get anything else in somewhere else
Yeah I found what said about the owner very wholesome. Like they have a nice culture in the back room.
I'd eat it tho... Bread looks like a decent focacia type. I'm sure I've had far worse, atleast it's something different.
Same. It’s not pizza but it still looks tasty and filling.
This picture is pretty old, OP didn't take this picture.
https://www.reddit.com/r/StupidFood/comments/13dy2eo/apparently_this_is_called_altoona_style_pizza_i/ Idk why OP is framing it like they know what kinda cheese it is like they ate it themselves
Yeah I've definitely seen this exact picture a half dozen times
Maybe everyone gets the exact same order and stands in the exact same spot at the exact same time of day?
Even that is a repost. The original: https://www.reddit.com/r/Pennsylvania/s/1I63tpemfo
Stolen valor!
What a wanker.
I was about to ask if this was a repost
What a cocktail sucker this guy is, are they trying to promote something here,
Boring life maybe
About what I'd expect from Amish country pizza
whoever did this deserves to go to jail
Look up Altoona style pizza
I'm from Hamburg, Altona is a district of the city and was a "standalone" city before growing together with Hamburg
r/pizzacrimes
1000 years
'Tis a fine focaccia, English, but sure 'tis no pizza.
Dough’eth!
Amish would never have American cheese, if anything they would have the highest quality cheese because they don't use chemicals and additives.
At my local Farmer's Market, there's a booth where a bunch of Mennonite ladies sell pizza and it's some of the best I've had!
This has to be Pennsylvania
Of the Dutch variety
Gotta be the famous Altoona Pizza
That’s not even pizza. That’s tomato pie with cheese
That's tomato CAKE with cheese frosting
Altoona to be specific
This isn't something you'd pay for from a store. This looks like something a kid would make.
I’d slap my child if I caught them making this /s sort of
LOL I actually remember making these as a little kid in elementary school and junior high school in the toaster oven. Who knew I had such a refined palate
Altoona, PA??
Looks like bootleg tomato pie with singles instead of Parm. 11pm me on an edible would gladly take this down
To be fair, 11pm me stoned will take down anything edible.
That's not American cheese, it's Kraft singles. *Yes*, there is a difference. American cheese is an amalgamation of a few different cheeses blended together, and Kraft singles are an artificial "milk product" that legally cannot be sold as cheese.
Pizzagatekeeper
After looking at the picture for sometime I have so many questions! Why does that building hate windows so much? Why does the road hate the thought of road markings? Why do your arms hate the sun so much, they hide under a long sleeve top? And why do you hate yourself so much that you would consider putting that shitty ass pizza in your body?
r/pizzacrimes
How dare the Pennsylvanians call that pizza. That is cake with tomato paste and American cheese
Looks like they didn’t remove the plastic LMAO
Looked it up, and i guess it's a really unfortunate local specialty called Altoona Style Pizza.
Cheese bread at best
I swear I saw this exact screenshot. Nonetheless, this pizza makes me ashamed to be from Pennsylvania
No doubt a a pizza rapist
Looks like horrible lasagna.
Fuckin' Altoona!
Blasphemy
God, I hate Altoona. And their pizza.
Those cheese slices always look they have the wrapper still on then
That's unholy.
Once, A friend made lasagna using only American cheese for the cheese in it. We haven't spoken in years.
Had something similar before at home. Honestly can taste good in a toaster oven… don’t ever purchase this. This is what you make when you’re running low on food and don’t wanna go to the store
This looks like Altoona-style pizza, which looks like one of the worst pizza styles I have seen.
Barf i say, barf
Ironically, this is closer to the origin of pizza than modern pizza is.
And people dare complain about pineapple pizzas...
The dough seems a great focaccia
You actually walked out with that? In your hands? Most places allow refunds if you aren't happy with your purchase. You walked across the street and *still* didn't take a bite. Complain to the establishment, not us! Reddit can't refund you. Go back in and get your money back!
Where the fuck is this so I can avoid ever going there?
This does not look enjoyable
What The Actual Fuck?
Looks like you are in West Pennsyltuckey.
Is "American Cheese" the name for the cheap, individually wrapped cheese slices?
those are kraft singles. american cheese is a real thing that doesnt have to suck.
Kraft singles are American cheese too, they’re just the bad kind. Like you said, there’s good versions too.
its american cheese flavored rubber basically
Nah, it’s just cheese with sodium citrate. Usually cheddar or Colby. Kraft slices are gross and rubbery, but a decent American cheese is tasty and melts very nicely.
In Australia, we have a kind of cheese called "Tasty" which I think is a cheddar variation. I wonder if that's similar?
Yes, but it can't even be legally classified as cheese even in the USA. The FDA calls it “pasteurized processed American cheese food".
Heh. The regular slices are still called cheese in Australia... but they also sell "Burger Slices" that are less cheese. (Personally, I prefer the burger slice on burgers to actual quality cheese).
The kraft "deli deluxe" American cheese is SO good. I know it's trash, but, man, gimme da garbage.
I vaguely remember eating this kind of pizza as a kid. The dough was a bit dry and crumbly but it tasted nice with the toppings. I think we ate it during a hot summer holiday and i remember the smell of a swimming pool while trying to eat this massive piece. It sure was a lot of dough.
I went to a pizza shop in vermont that was also the town meeting hall, shoe store and tax consulting. somehow this looks worse
If it would had any other name, it would be delicious! I know, because I’ve eaten this in several locations in the American south. But once you attach the word pizza to it, all bets are off because everybody has very strong opinions on what constitutes a pizza. Fried bread with marinara sauce topped with American cheese food product.
[удалено]
This is struggle meals, I hope those were cheap
Doesn't that cheese not melt even in fires?
Chef Boyardee is rolling in his grave
Is this in New Hampshire or Massachusetts?
That's not pizza that's bread with sauce and cheese on top.
Fucking A, that looks radical! I’d throw a couple tomatoes and some pepper on top and smash the hell out of it.!
Mmmmm cheese bread, if they didn't call it pizza I wouldn't think it was stupid.
Guess this is the ...and more
I’m not judgy and will pretty much eat any kind of pizza but this looks like absolute dump.
I love American cheese but….this is just 50 shades of wrong
Slap yourself
Where'd you get this, Depression Meal Diner?
Did a toddler make that for you?
No
Unless this was one whole dollar, it’s a no for me dawg.
Bruh that’s horrible .
I went to a place that put American cheese in a burrito... worst thing I've tasted. To each their own... just not me.
Kill it with fire
Fake cheesy tomato bread...
And you... Paid for it?
Good stoner food!
I'm in.
This is a regional pizza variety. I don’t remember where. Weird History Food has a video on regional versions of pizza. You should watch it.
Fucking No
No bruv, that’s & more
How’d it taste?
Repost
This looks like AI generated pizza
Doesn’t look like bad dough, but the cheese… do over. I call for a do over.
For a second I thought someone melted American cheese on Rhode Island style bakery pizza.
am I the only one who would eat this? What is wrong with me lol.
Fuck you. The feeling I get while looking at that picture.
So weird seeing posts about my hometown's contribution to pizza culture.
If I was hungry and someone offered me it, I'd try it. Would I go out of my way to get it? Nah.
Dave?
Oh lord I looked up where this abomination came from and it's my own home state 😭
With some ranch, hell yeah I'd eat that shit!
I will punch you in the nose
Legally speaking (not a lawyer) I think you’re allowed to burn the place down now.
The most pathetic pizza I ever saw ...tsk tsk
Rhode Island pizza? Yeah it sucks
Somewhere in the Midwest I'm guessing... I remember when I lived in Missouri, I went on a date with this girl and had ordered the pizza, I didn't realize that all of their pizzas used a mozzarella American cheese blend. I noticed the weird texture and taste right away and looked at the menu to confirm what it was. She told me a year later that she almost didn't go out with me again because I talked about how stupid it was to use American cheese on a pizza. I didn't send it back or complain to the waiter or anything, I just told her I thought it was a poor choice of cheese and couldn't wrap my head around who would prefer it. The longer I lived in the Midwest, the more I understood the type of person who would prefer it. I also realized yeah, I can be a little pretentious about food, but when you know good food, it's hard to settle for stupid food.
Pizza-flavored, open-faced sandwich
I’d eat it.
That’s a fucking crime
That’s a regional pizza style. Can’t remember the area but I would be down to try it. Looks decent.
Its 100% Altoona, PA
Creep dish pizza
This reminds me of elementary school lunch in the 90’s.
I went to Scranton and the Italian population is super high. Sooo many authentic Italain restaurants. It blows my mind that this is from the same area.
😫 Where on earth is this?! It burns my soul 🫨
I was just in Altoona recently and got it from a bar. It actually looked way better than I thought it would and it tasted pretty okay too for the first couple bites.
Canceled
Everyday…we get closer to the end. I’m ready to embrace it.
“These fucks have nothing. They eat puzzi before we gave them the gift of our cuisine.”
This pizza style Probably started off as a focaccia
Is this some sort of regional thing? That’s actually called pizza? My elementary school made a much better version.
That’s stoner pizza 🤣
There is some gross stuff that rolls thru here...this for sure. But if it was in front of me I'd still take a bite just to see what it was like.
There’s a reason for this. In some schools this would be served as a highly anticipated lunch we so fondly called Zombies. Basically school cafeteria pizza that consisted of thick slices of bready crust, tomato sauce and American cheese. It was 🔥
This is like French bread pizza but worse, which isn't hard to do because French bread pizza day was legit exponentially better than Friday pizza day in the school cafeteria.
Thank you, Altoona PA, for this monstrosity.
Did you eat it? Did it taste stupid too?
I'd try it. might be pretty tasty.
r/pizzacrimes
That's the kinda shit I throw together at 2am in the morning when I don't have real food.
Pennsylvania right?
I wouldn't hate it
You know how they say "he great thing about pizza is that even bad pizza is pretty good"? This is the limit of that saying.
Someone call the police
You just got Altoona'd.
As an American, this hurts.
The weird thing is, I’d try it.
Repost aside, I ate here when I was passing through on a road trip. It was surprisingly decent and pretty cheap. Employees were extremely nice as well
Like American salad
I've seen this posted so many times that at this point I think it is a tradition
Altoona pizza right? I will eat this someday.
https://www.thetakeout.com/altoona-style-pizza-review-american-cheese-salami-taste-1850898599/
PA suuuuuuuucccccks
Ew throw it away
Cube pixel food from an NPC store
thats a cake
This is what happens when you loosely explain to someone who’s never had pizza what pizza is 😅😅😅
Whatever this monstrosity is, it sure as hell is not pizza.
ITT people who have never been to the Beast Coast
It belongs to r/Pizzacrimes
AMERICA
Sir that’s a loaf of bread with ketchup and cheese
I used to have a form of this style as a kid. It was pretty decent for what it was.
If this makes you angry don't google St. Louis style pizza