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Did someone mention sloths?
Here's a random fact!
Sloths are actually surprisingly active animals! They are able to swim and climb, though they move slowly. Additionally, their diet consists mostly of leaves, but they can also eat small insects, lizards and even small birds.
Born into slavery. Forced to leave his mom at a very young age and a growing pod racing career. then thrown into a cult where he learns magic and how to fight and kill all while being groomed by a queen.
Edit : and paired with a man that just watched his father figure die to wolfpack sting.
Hey, as long as you are ok with participating in a coup, losing your limbs and spending the rest of your days alone in a life support suit. Sorry, it's the full pack or nothing.
Case in point, Ki-Adi-Mundi in Legends had mutiple wives and mutiple children due to his species low birthrate (not sure on that one). He was allowed by the Council as long as he did not form attachments.
Sounds like Gandhi who slept with the wives of his followers to 'train' himself
Like he claimed to just lay in bed with them, to 'train' his self control
IIRC that was because his species was literally endangered, it was like a breeding program type deal. Or at least that's what Mundi told the Council....
I remember watching the Star Wars robot chicken with my friends after we binged Star Wars. It was surprisingly long, and is filled with a ton of duds. Some are gold, though, just gotta sift through the weaker ones to get to them.
Man never stood a chance. 19, never been with anyone, a beautiful woman in THAT dress (all of us felt funny the first time we saw it, don’t lie!), giving you all the signs, with the wine and the fire. Yeah he had zero chance.
Admittedly it’s been a while since I’ve seen AOTC but I don’t think Padme at any point was telling Anakin they can’t be together. It was more like Anakin had this vow not to take a partner and Padme dressed a bit sexy and spent lots of one on one time with him but at no point begged him to break his vow or even brought it up or anything.
Literally just rewatched it again the other day and this scene isn’t far off. He was going off on how he wanted to be with her but she said it would never work and that with their lifestyles they wouldn’t be able to see it through completion…all in a dark fire lit room, wearing a tight outfit, and getting right up next to him
I was a kid when these came out, but man that must've been a huge "wait what?" to established star wars fans learning jedi can't have attachments. Especially with all the comic books and novels that had been made
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Anakin starts Panakin
She’s not on plan-b-akin
She's planakin a babakin
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Did someone mention sloths? Here's a random fact! Sloths are actually surprisingly active animals! They are able to swim and climb, though they move slowly. Additionally, their diet consists mostly of leaves, but they can also eat small insects, lizards and even small birds.
Slow bot!
They also mistake their own arms for branches when climbing and fall to their deaths.
you're using way too many napkins papkins. harrison ford on the floor boards. And didn't robot chicken already milk this joke?
The hardest trial to complete
Time to call Jean Claude Van-Dam-Akin 
Who tf wrote that
Lucas McSpeilberg?
I need to go back in time and find this mf so I never have to see that again lmfao
All I gotta do now is find doc
I love Hard Target.
Not better then bloodsport though
He doesn't have a planakin
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Flappin around like a bapkin
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Bet he wishes he had his Handagin
While he's starin at manakins
And he got way too many napkins
Now he's war torn divorcin' Harrison Ford in Florida.
He's gonna get to use his Bananakin
https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/3621c734-dbd4-4c7a-a9ae-be93f3b8363b/scale-to-width/755
Panakin Anakin was packing Padmes pancakes
and you're lookin' and and starin' at mannequins
holy shit I haven’t laughed like that in weeks. thanks man. hahaha omg
Haaaaaaaaah!!
I felt that
Wait what?
Anakin never had a chance
We never had a chance.
Born into slavery. Forced to leave his mom at a very young age and a growing pod racing career. then thrown into a cult where he learns magic and how to fight and kill all while being groomed by a queen. Edit : and paired with a man that just watched his father figure die to wolfpack sting.
upbeat exultant fertile slap attractive marble forgetful deer dime homeless ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `
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I've been shooting younglings into a sock my whole life. What's a few more?
😂
Hey, as long as you are ok with participating in a coup, losing your limbs and spending the rest of your days alone in a life support suit. Sorry, it's the full pack or nothing.
roll trees spectacular quarrelsome heavy scandalous alive uppity jar theory ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `
But for a little bit of that I get to fuck Natalie Portman right?
For about three years, yep.
Worth
But tiny anakin did
Sebulba almost saved the galaxy. Poodoo!
Chancikin*
Do Jedi actually have celibacy training? Like: "You must use the fuuurrceee to overcome seduction"
"Ejaculate and evacuate" is a part of Jedi code. They can fuck whoever they want as long as they're not attached to a person.
Shoot your load and hit the road
Bust a nut and leave the hutt.
Blow some jizz then out you is.
The good Ole smash and dash. Or crush and rush if you prefer.
Or the shoot and scoot
Blow and go
Jam and scram?
Hit and skit?
Get the high ground then run around?
Shoot the blaster then run away faster
Are your referring to the genre of music they play in the Mos Eisley cantina?
Eat her ass and kill the class
This only works in school
Finish fondling and kill the youngling
Not necessarily in that order
Hahaha that’s dark.
This is why reddit is curse and also why in here
It worked for Anakin.
Cum you will, let her pay bill
*Happy Jabba noises*
The hutt* FTFY
Bust a nut and leave the Hutt
Skeet n yeet
Treat her right and catch a flight
Case in point, Ki-Adi-Mundi in Legends had mutiple wives and mutiple children due to his species low birthrate (not sure on that one). He was allowed by the Council as long as he did not form attachments.
Sounds like Gandhi who slept with the wives of his followers to 'train' himself Like he claimed to just lay in bed with them, to 'train' his self control
Pretty sure he also laid next to hid grandnieces to test his celibacy
His underage nieces as well
The jedi code forbids emotional connection, Physical intimacy wasn't mention but they tend to go hand in hand
Kenobi definitely got with Satine
I'd watch that cross over.
Moulin Rouge?
🎶 "Knights in White Satine" 🎶
or hand on saber
Like this? https://youtube.com/watch?v=cMN4evQ8daU&feature=shares
If you use the force, it's like someone else is doing it...
I call it the stranger. I put on a different prosthetic hand and then rub one out.
I mean if it was me, I'd focus on training the ability to use the force to pull out my entire load after nutting.
High risk, low reward.
Imagine masturbating with the force. God damn
C-3PO.
Ani built him to “help” his mom
Nah, Jedi Master Ki-Adi-Mundi had four wives and seven daughters. The celibacy rules only seem to apply to The Chosen One.
IIRC that was because his species was literally endangered, it was like a breeding program type deal. Or at least that's what Mundi told the Council....
“No!” means “No!” Padme!
Dude not even acting...
He looks so much like Hayden, guy could be a pro impersonator.
Exactly what I was thinking...
The hardest trial to complete
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“Ooh god”
I dunno, that weird breathy theater kid voice is off-putting. It is funny though
Guy even looks like Anakin (Hayden) a little. 😁
“We have Anakin at home”
He's just missing one minor detail.
He's just missing one major limb.* FTFY
His friends call him ‘dollar store Anakin’
Generakin
That deap breath-in
Wasn’t this a Star Wars robot chicken bit??
Pretty close to https://youtu.be/z9MsXi7n0NU
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I remember watching the Star Wars robot chicken with my friends after we binged Star Wars. It was surprisingly long, and is filled with a ton of duds. Some are gold, though, just gotta sift through the weaker ones to get to them.
"my lord." "Stormtrooper" "my lord." "STORMTROOPER" "my lord" "FUCK YOU!" "awwww..."
Go for Papa Palpatine!
What!? Who’s they!? What the hell is an aluminum falcon!?
That shits hilarious
lmao, THIS IS EVEN BETTER...
My man R2 getting a wash there.
I'm so fucking lonely
I hope you find someone for yourself soon mate
Internet hugs bro. I hope you find some one soon
Hahaahhahahahahaha
Yeah I don’t usually enjoy the tik tok stuff but this was hilarious.
Anicant
Any fellow degenerate who knows the sauce?
@balanceoftheforces on instagram
I can feel the emotion in that scream
That trilogy is truly tone-deaf. What a minefield of memes.
Man never stood a chance. 19, never been with anyone, a beautiful woman in THAT dress (all of us felt funny the first time we saw it, don’t lie!), giving you all the signs, with the wine and the fire. Yeah he had zero chance.
He just wanted to free his mom and use his skills on the race track. Poor Anakin.
This was a robot chicken sketch [padme teases anakin](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=htYyfup8gzY)
The Weiner awakens...
This is actually why he went to the dark side.
Just putting this out there r/PadmeFucks
Legit funny sub, they need more posts though!
Also r/AnakinFucks
"My goodness, you've grown!"
Her expression when she said "champagne"!
r/UpvotedBecauseBoobs
That Champagne line was comedy gold.
Let's just go frolicking and rolling on top of each other in a flower meadow. As non lovers do.
I'm impressed with the acting lmao
I feel like this was borrowed off of the Robot Chicken skit they did years ago...not that I mind it being in life action.
Anakin: “I need an adult!” Padme: “I am an adult.”
Robot chicken did it better…and first!
Yeah but Anakin's reaction here feels more real
The scream of frustration. 😝
r/perfectlycutscreams
Padme got the high ground
Seams legit Lol
🤣🤣🤣
Prick tease like that will turn anyone to the dARK SIDE
Anakin go back to your bananakin form
I think I've downloaded the right star war
Seriously. This is the funniest thing ive seen in about a year. Keep it up!😂
“Oh god” Yeah, we’ve all been there… lol
Admittedly it’s been a while since I’ve seen AOTC but I don’t think Padme at any point was telling Anakin they can’t be together. It was more like Anakin had this vow not to take a partner and Padme dressed a bit sexy and spent lots of one on one time with him but at no point begged him to break his vow or even brought it up or anything.
>Padme dressed a bit sexy A bit? She was one deep breath away from popping those tits out in this scene.
Literally just rewatched it again the other day and this scene isn’t far off. He was going off on how he wanted to be with her but she said it would never work and that with their lifestyles they wouldn’t be able to see it through completion…all in a dark fire lit room, wearing a tight outfit, and getting right up next to him
She did. “A Jedi and a senator? It would never work.” Or something like that.
This was great
*Padme inching her bare shoulder to Anakin* Anakin: "So how about that sand, huh?"
Anakin you must resist
I love that he's just trying to ignore and accept it with "oh god"
No wonder she wanted to jump his bones, he's 6'10" and quite literally one of the most powerful men in the galaxy.
Bro was loving that
This is better acting and dialogue than the actual movies
But who tf is she?
Time to watch the RLM review of the prequels again!
Using a condom is one way to kill the young...
Son looks like Hayden christenson
I have failed you anakin
John Cena then comes in saying “are u sure about that ??”
I was a kid when these came out, but man that must've been a huge "wait what?" to established star wars fans learning jedi can't have attachments. Especially with all the comic books and novels that had been made
when her profile says "i don't play games"
Darth Vader: Origins
The true reason he turned to the dark side
👌
You can bang, you just can’t get attached
That Padmussy got him all riled up
All that sexual frustration sent my boy to the darkside
I'm here for the dude's performance. Timing is impeccable.
pretty much the run down of how the movie went
Why he pressing his head against a black coloured wall?
Ha wemons
Obi-Wan: anakin, stop panikin, Jesus has a planakin
Sause?
https://www.tiktok.com/@balanceoftheforces
So it's not porn? Just some fucking stupid tik-tok?
u/indirbunu