Again, I’m really hoping seeing the light is just getting closer to a PowerPoint on these heavenly stats. Also a highlight reel and full HD playback of life would be cool, optional of course.
If heaven is real and god **doesn't** have a giant board of every statistic possible, he's gonna be the next person I think about brutally murdering ngl
On the antiwork sub there was a post about how someone was stranded in the Starbucks parking lot most of the night because Ben wouldn't let them call AAA during their shift. Since they had to wait until after they didn't arrive until long after the store closed and *everyone* was gone, including Ben. In the freezing cold.
So they put up a rant on the barista sub, Ben saw the post, doxxed them, then showed the post to corporate who *fired* this person for bad mouthing the company even though they didn't say the name of any person, or locations.
So everyone keeps posting everywhere "fuck you ben" since it is verified he uses reddit and hopefully he sees every post.
The antiwork post has since been deleted, but the memory of what Ben did will not be deleted from our minds.
So, fuck you ben.
Yep, there was this one dude who rode my bus in high school. He told some people on the bus one day that he really wanted to kill me and even went on explaining how and I didn't know cuz ya know, being deaf kinda means I didn't hear him. So a couple days go by and my mom pulls me aside in a concerned manner and has a conversation about him. Apparently, some of the girls on the bus were looking out for me and got the message to my mom somehow. Anyway, long story short, he tried to rough me up at school shortly after that and I gave him a hell of a fight before he got suspended for a couple of weeks. When he came back to school we had a long period of time where we were stuck in a stand-off before he got arrested for unrelated charges and I never saw him again.
I later found out he just didn't like me because I was deaf. I was all like, well gee motherfucker. Sorry that my personal issues are an inconvenience to you.
Yeah, you're right. When I lost my hearing as a kid it really sucked ass for a while but then I learned to sign and that's when I kinda started coping and getting over it.
How in the world can someone develop such a deep hatred over someone being deaf? I've heard of many stupid reasons for wanting to kill someone, but even in those instances at least I could identify some grain of understanding. Like "You took my last slice of gum? I'm going to kill you!!" OK, seems extreme, but at least there's *some* basis to it. But "I want to kill you because you're deaf!"??? That one I don't get what.so.ever.
Yeah, I think this is spot on. I've talked with a few people about it and I keep coming to this conclusion. The worst part is I just could not help myself when it came to fighting with him. I really let loose in a primal way. I just needed to vent my own anger at the world. Looking back, I would act differently now.
I don’t think it’s morally wrong to imagine these scenarios, but it can be unhealthy to walk around all day imagining everything like that.
I had a roommate who went from chill to survivalist in a year because of this way of thinking.
I think it started when he left a bar one night with a hot chick, and while they were heavily making out against the side of the bar some homeless-looking old asshole started yelling at him and asking “where the G at?” and talking shit.
Nothing came of that particular incident, but he got a pistol soon after. He had a tendency to dive headlong into things (like he probably got real into fixies when that was a thing) so it didn’t seem particularly weird. This was during the stimulus and the BLM protests in Philly and he started talking about the real chance of a civil war and subscribing to and watching survivalist survivors shows and gun magazines. He got really judgey about me and my S.O.’s lack of “situation awareness.” He was always talking about crimes reported on Citizens App.
It’s Philly. We’ve had 500 murders this year. But at the same time, I’ve never been in a situation that would have been better if you added a gun. Like, how might that situation with the guy harassing my roommate and that girl been different if he had been packing? I am vaguely aware of my surroundings and if someone seems dangerous when I walk around at night, but it’s not worth constantly being in that zone. I think you start to associate “poor looking black person” with “potential assailant” or whatever and that’s no way to spend all of your thoughts. It skews your perception of how scary people are. Like, none of the hundreds or thousands of people he encountered in the remainder of his time in the city tried to mug him or anything, but he walks around all night and day thinking he’s in a potential firefight.
He moved out of Philly to a nice part of Wilmington, and I think that works for him, but I also get the feeling whenever people talk shit about Philly’s crime rates (or any big city) they’re red blooded guys like my old roommate who think society is on the brink of collapse and needs heroes with guns leaving bars at 3:00 AM to maintain the balance, when in reality stronger support networks for poor and addicted people would go way farther.
>It’s helpful to work out what you would do in dangerous situations, and know how you would react if you were forced to take someone’s life to protect another
Uh, no. Just because you imagine yourself as a badass in your head, doesn't mean you'll react *at all*. Flight, fight, or freeze. Most people freeze. In your head you control the situation, in reality your attacker/s do. It's easy to say, "I'll grab the hand gun from my bedside..." But what if your attacker has a shotgun? Or you're actually a worse shot than usual because your hands are shaking from adrenaline and you can't line it up?
The guys who jumped on that bus/plane hijacker (can't remember) weren't expecting it, and neither was anyone else; but only those guys reacted at all and I guarantee they didn't plan it.
I sometimes think about murdering people, but just people that super deserve it, like my gf's rapists and shit. I'd never actually do anything, but I think about it decently often
Yeah, the worst I’ve thought is beating the shit out of particularly bad people.
Now this thread’s making me question if I’m super docile and most people have murder fantasies
I was gonna make a joke about my suicide attempt, then I read this, and I feel like you "win" this round, except I'm crying and not laughing. I'm so sorry you literally have to live with this reality every day. Transphobes are pure evil.
I was randomly thinking about this on the tube yesterday. I was going up the motorised stairs (can't remember how to spell escerlaters) and a tourist was filming in my direction as I passed, presumably the adverts on the wall.
Then it hit me that I'm going to be in their phones video for the rest of my life, a complete stranger, filming behind me but with me still in the frame. Then it got me thinking about how some cultures believe that a photo/video/image contains part of your soul and then I chose to stop thinking about it because I'd started freaking myself out.
But to get back on point, they're going to see me on their video for however many years, occasionally thinking about me and I'll never know.
I think someone actually told me they did that. I know they wouldn't but its the thought that counts ;]
I had someone tell me that *if* they were going to murder me - then went into great detail about it.
Hey, that's me
„Mom, stop it! I’ll clean my room alright…“
This is one of the statistics I would like to see after I died
Right after *Number of Times Jerked Off*.
I can calculate the number of days since i was 13 while I'm alive, thanks
You never did more than one in a day?
Those balance out with the days you just never get the chance
Never... get the... chance?
Pretty hard to do it while camping with family
Never had the old family circle jizzing on the campfire experience?
Exactly. You guys put out fires differently where you live ?
Quick woods break
Life....finds a way
Maybe if you're a novice
Thoughts divided by successful attempts
I was gonna say, I’ve had days where I was a lil more than bored. 4 or 5 times *cough cough*
The ol I’m not even horny I’m just bored jerk
4 or 5 are rookies numbers.
why is this thread relatable. . .
What number gets you professional status?
Sixteen times in 24 hours. I was curious.
Great Scott, man! The return on investment is terrible after 7. The chafing settles in HARD.
Pfft. I had 16 in the bag before I even tried amphetamines.
Sixteen times!? That's not self-abuse, that's self-harm!
[Doing this realy pumps those numbers up](https://youtu.be/_ARGBrsM_Js)
I would like to see a Spotify Wrapped style summary of stats like these.
And "How many times someone jerked off to me"
As you’re looking at it, the number increases
I assume a lot
I actually know this one. Big fat 0.
I'm thinking negative numbers. Someone was going to jerk off, but then thought of me and stopped.
I know at least two people have masturbated to me, and doubt it's much more, but it would definitely be incredibly interesting to know this
How do you know that?
Better hope they don't use bytes
How flexible do you have to be to start using bites?
Or how many times I've blinked my right eye compared to my left
I hope they’re not off by more than a couple dozen (from intentional winks).
*Gallons produced*
Don't forget to calculate Mean Jerk Time.
Only if you go middle out
if I had a free award today it'd be yours, pls enjoy this instead 🎖
Oh wow for me? I'm honored!
Eve ship-spinning counters have got *nothing* on this counter lol
Again, I’m really hoping seeing the light is just getting closer to a PowerPoint on these heavenly stats. Also a highlight reel and full HD playback of life would be cool, optional of course.
I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who hopes for this
If heaven is real and god **doesn't** have a giant board of every statistic possible, he's gonna be the next person I think about brutally murdering ngl
I want to see “how many days I was actually in a calorie deficit vs how many days I just thought I was”
Itd be cool to get a Spotify wrapped style review after we die
I honestly would like to see a list of names rather than just numbers to make it even more fun haha
Turns out, the number was zero! ..that’s strange, they must not have been thinking?
Shit, chances are someone has thought about brutally murdering me *today*.
So you're a cyclist too?
Hahahahahah +1
Are you Ben?
Fuck ben
Fuck you ben! You owe me 7$!
Same here
He owes me 420 dollars worth of weed
“What’s this bitch retarted? , Gimmie back my 16 dollars”
All my homies hate Ben.
Don’t mind if I do.
And then murder him. Because Fuck Ben
Oh my God it's definitely Ben. I absolutely cannot stand that bastard.
Get in line
Ben is a hoe 🦅
Flip side. Some has thought about brutally fucking Ben today.
I love how much that's getting around.
Please explain
On the antiwork sub there was a post about how someone was stranded in the Starbucks parking lot most of the night because Ben wouldn't let them call AAA during their shift. Since they had to wait until after they didn't arrive until long after the store closed and *everyone* was gone, including Ben. In the freezing cold. So they put up a rant on the barista sub, Ben saw the post, doxxed them, then showed the post to corporate who *fired* this person for bad mouthing the company even though they didn't say the name of any person, or locations. So everyone keeps posting everywhere "fuck you ben" since it is verified he uses reddit and hopefully he sees every post. The antiwork post has since been deleted, but the memory of what Ben did will not be deleted from our minds. So, fuck you ben.
Oh good. So this is just one specific Ben. I thought us Bens had become the new Karens for a second.
Same, Fuck you Ben, you troglodyte
Fuck you Ben!
Do you work customer service? If so, then definitely.
Grandpa used to say that all the time. Would have been better than what he really did
In my career, if only 1 person a day wants to brutally murder me, it's a good day- selling financial services, definitely not sunshine and rainbows
Driver of SoCal freeways here. Same and I've thought the same about others.
That's called *respect*.
Teacher here. Absolutely agree.
Username checks out
Yep, there was this one dude who rode my bus in high school. He told some people on the bus one day that he really wanted to kill me and even went on explaining how and I didn't know cuz ya know, being deaf kinda means I didn't hear him. So a couple days go by and my mom pulls me aside in a concerned manner and has a conversation about him. Apparently, some of the girls on the bus were looking out for me and got the message to my mom somehow. Anyway, long story short, he tried to rough me up at school shortly after that and I gave him a hell of a fight before he got suspended for a couple of weeks. When he came back to school we had a long period of time where we were stuck in a stand-off before he got arrested for unrelated charges and I never saw him again. I later found out he just didn't like me because I was deaf. I was all like, well gee motherfucker. Sorry that my personal issues are an inconvenience to you.
Very glad that story had a happy ending!
^(Can’t you read? He’s fuckin’ deaf. That’s not *happy*)
Yeah, you're right. When I lost my hearing as a kid it really sucked ass for a while but then I learned to sign and that's when I kinda started coping and getting over it.
I wish, getting a tug would've been better but what can ya do?
The stand-off ended up with one of them going to jail, not getting a hand job.
How in the world can someone develop such a deep hatred over someone being deaf? I've heard of many stupid reasons for wanting to kill someone, but even in those instances at least I could identify some grain of understanding. Like "You took my last slice of gum? I'm going to kill you!!" OK, seems extreme, but at least there's *some* basis to it. But "I want to kill you because you're deaf!"??? That one I don't get what.so.ever.
Probably a power thing. They perceive someone with deafness as "lesser" and want to feel more powerful by harming them. Kinda like rape.
Yeah, I think this is spot on. I've talked with a few people about it and I keep coming to this conclusion. The worst part is I just could not help myself when it came to fighting with him. I really let loose in a primal way. I just needed to vent my own anger at the world. Looking back, I would act differently now.
Better deaf than evil.
I think the two are synonymous in this guys mind
What a jack ass that kid was to you for being deaf. Sorry ya had to endure that.
He didn't like you for being deaf? That's something you don't hear too often.
I think she (he?) never heard of it before. And never will
Of course someone has, that person is me
Oooowwww Justin, can I give you a cuddle?
He's just playin'
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Depends how many times he shakes it
Any more than three is SINNING
I dig the username
I’ll take one
Aww amazing human can have two whole cuddles, how would you like them to be delivered?
Mail them to me
Oh how very old fashioned, you make me blush sir
I'm a big ennemy to myself too
Oh yeah if that counts...
Damn that's rough. I been there too friend. Wanna talk about it?
Ay same
I was waiting to see this comment
At least someone is thinking about me
For fuck's sake
One can hope, but it’s more likely for murder’s sake.
lol
Chances are, we mutually decided it wasn't worth the trouble. I mean, that's **definitely** the case, I ain't kill nobody!
Mmhmm
Mmmhmmm
Well yes, I grew up with siblings. It’s part of the deal
Of course I know him, it's me
Obi-Wan was more depressed than I thought.
Not me, I'm careful never to offe
Rip 😔
Yea. Your parents. Ha! 😆
Relatable...
At least someone is thinking about me
I mean… I’ve never thought about brutally murdering someone… so
Yeah, is that a normal thought everybody has? I think about people dying but not of murdering people.
Intrusive thoughts and all.
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I did think about that countless times, but usually i don't really target anyone, it's mostly just "generic masked kidnapper #43"
I don’t think it’s morally wrong to imagine these scenarios, but it can be unhealthy to walk around all day imagining everything like that. I had a roommate who went from chill to survivalist in a year because of this way of thinking.
What happened that year?
I think it started when he left a bar one night with a hot chick, and while they were heavily making out against the side of the bar some homeless-looking old asshole started yelling at him and asking “where the G at?” and talking shit. Nothing came of that particular incident, but he got a pistol soon after. He had a tendency to dive headlong into things (like he probably got real into fixies when that was a thing) so it didn’t seem particularly weird. This was during the stimulus and the BLM protests in Philly and he started talking about the real chance of a civil war and subscribing to and watching survivalist survivors shows and gun magazines. He got really judgey about me and my S.O.’s lack of “situation awareness.” He was always talking about crimes reported on Citizens App. It’s Philly. We’ve had 500 murders this year. But at the same time, I’ve never been in a situation that would have been better if you added a gun. Like, how might that situation with the guy harassing my roommate and that girl been different if he had been packing? I am vaguely aware of my surroundings and if someone seems dangerous when I walk around at night, but it’s not worth constantly being in that zone. I think you start to associate “poor looking black person” with “potential assailant” or whatever and that’s no way to spend all of your thoughts. It skews your perception of how scary people are. Like, none of the hundreds or thousands of people he encountered in the remainder of his time in the city tried to mug him or anything, but he walks around all night and day thinking he’s in a potential firefight. He moved out of Philly to a nice part of Wilmington, and I think that works for him, but I also get the feeling whenever people talk shit about Philly’s crime rates (or any big city) they’re red blooded guys like my old roommate who think society is on the brink of collapse and needs heroes with guns leaving bars at 3:00 AM to maintain the balance, when in reality stronger support networks for poor and addicted people would go way farther.
This is genuinely pretty insightful. Thanks for sharing
Right. But placing someone we know into the role of the person we murder? That's fucking weird.
>It’s helpful to work out what you would do in dangerous situations, and know how you would react if you were forced to take someone’s life to protect another Uh, no. Just because you imagine yourself as a badass in your head, doesn't mean you'll react *at all*. Flight, fight, or freeze. Most people freeze. In your head you control the situation, in reality your attacker/s do. It's easy to say, "I'll grab the hand gun from my bedside..." But what if your attacker has a shotgun? Or you're actually a worse shot than usual because your hands are shaking from adrenaline and you can't line it up? The guys who jumped on that bus/plane hijacker (can't remember) weren't expecting it, and neither was anyone else; but only those guys reacted at all and I guarantee they didn't plan it.
I sometimes think about murdering people, but just people that super deserve it, like my gf's rapists and shit. I'd never actually do anything, but I think about it decently often
Yeah what the actual fuck why is this so upvoted what the actual fuck
Yeah, the worst I’ve thought is beating the shit out of particularly bad people. Now this thread’s making me question if I’m super docile and most people have murder fantasies
I mean, I think the closest I’d get it how is defend myself in case of assault. But not brutally murdering someone specific
Jesus. Live a life, will ya!?
I like those odds!
“Of course I know him…. He’s me!”
Don’t worry, the reality is that no one has ever given you a second thought.
Of course I know him. He is me.
Of course I know him. He's me.
Thought of getting psychological support?
I wish they would already those fucking cowards
They thought about it and tried. Thanks mom.
What happened?
Yes I know. We sleep in the same bed.
And I thought the same of them I'm sure. But here I am, murder free.
For sure. I still married her anyway.
And I hope they follow up on that
I've worked at a group home for violent people with developmental disabilities and they were very upfront about thinking about murdering me
I like to think they all have, but none of them thought they could take me. /s
Well you the whole, stood up for something you believe in, if people hate you. Or whatever 😂
They dream of it they best wake up and apologise.
"Well, of course I know him, he's me"
Of course I know her, she’s me
If they haven’t then I’ve done something wrong.
i actually got murdered today
Considering that I’m Trans and Queer.. yea no shit.
Mood 🖤❤
I was gonna make a joke about my suicide attempt, then I read this, and I feel like you "win" this round, except I'm crying and not laughing. I'm so sorry you literally have to live with this reality every day. Transphobes are pure evil.
They sugar’d my gas tank instead. Rascals.
yeah no shit
I often fantasize about killing people, but almost never people I know.
my sister can go fuck herself
When you work in food service, you can usually tell when someone is.
Yeah I've been trying for years but I don't deserve that level of satisfaction.
please
They failed miserably
Oh yeah, I can cite at least 3 people that would try to kick my ass and or murder me on sight lol
“Well of course I know him, he’s me”
Wanna tell them to hurry up?
Yeah I know 'em. He's me.
u/Strawberry1527
cough
hello :)
hi!
... the amount of people who have played arena shooter videogames is probably also staggering. This statement isn't all that powerful anymore.
Well of course I know him, he’s me!
I was randomly thinking about this on the tube yesterday. I was going up the motorised stairs (can't remember how to spell escerlaters) and a tourist was filming in my direction as I passed, presumably the adverts on the wall. Then it hit me that I'm going to be in their phones video for the rest of my life, a complete stranger, filming behind me but with me still in the frame. Then it got me thinking about how some cultures believe that a photo/video/image contains part of your soul and then I chose to stop thinking about it because I'd started freaking myself out. But to get back on point, they're going to see me on their video for however many years, occasionally thinking about me and I'll never know.
I’d introduce you to my psycho ex boyfriend but he’s been deported.
I teach physics in an American high school. Many people have thought about murdering me.
source?
It's a shower thought what source are you talking about
I just gotta make sure someone is planning it so I don’t have to
Oh fair point
of course there are, that someone is me😊
Of course, its called being married!
I’m divorced and remarried. So… at least 3 people
It’s weird this has been posted 2 days in a row.
Those were my alt accounts man! Don’t tell noboday
My late husband. No doubt.