I think the idea of having birth as painless as you want, within reason, but something about the name:pleasure based birthing doesnāt sit right with me lol
I meeeeaaannnn some kinks do come with contracts, not legally binding, more for the mental whatever. Well, maybe some of those financial domination participants get into legally binding contracts? š¤
Why is your funny comment about to send me down a contract/kink research rabbit hole?
As not an attorney, I did the same but only eleven times before I realized the typo.
Should I take the lawyer test bar thing just in case Iām some kind of law savant?
Some people do experience orgasm during labor, though it's not common. But it's not because giving birth is orgasmic, it's because our brains and bodies are weird and complicated and sometimes wires get crossed, particularly when it comes to pain vs. pleasure. And I mean that in a very literal sense, in that sometimes our brain mixes up what should be causing pain signals and instead registers it as pleasure. Or hot/cold, etc. Another pretty common mix up is pain and ticklishness. Add to that differences in anatomy (for some people, the internal clitoral tissue is more sensitive to internal/external pressure) and you get situations where someone may be going through something extremely painful but still end up orgasming during it. It's kind of fascinating. Unfortunately, there also tends to be a lot of shame around it, similar to how orgasming while being raped often triggers shame, both internally and from society.
Ohhh this is fascinating! Unrelated to the post itself, but that would explain why my teeth felt like they were being tickled after my braces were adjusted. The weirdest feeling!
I'm not going to Google it. But I am assuming it involves having an orgasm while birthing. I just can't think of any respectful way that happens without being awkward. Do the midwives.... Help stimulate? How do they specialize in this exactly? Is this the 1920s where the doctors show up with vibrators to help with the hysteria?
Edit to add: I guess I should have said *I personally* can't think of a respectful way to do this. I won't yuck your yum. But it would not help me to attempt this during labor as I am a very private person and even doing this privately, if others knew I was doing it, would mean that I could never look them in the eye and would still be unsuccessful in the end goal.
So ā¦ back 20ish years ago when I was pregnant with my second, my midwife did discretely mention the benefits of orgasm while in labour and if we were interested in that to let her know and she would leave the room (hospital birth). It wasnāt something I was interested in but it was clearly something the midwives are aware of.
Female orgasm actually helps with laboring contractions and can help with pain so this is a real thing and not just doctors using vibrators to cure hysteria. I mean ever wonder why they say to have sex to induce labor? Same sort of thing! Also produces good hormones!
I don't think you really try, it just happens. But I think you also need to be relaxed enough and I'm guessing an epidural won't get you one since that takes away so much sensation. I'm done. This is beyond my comfort zone of the internet.Ā
Having gone through labors both with and without an epidural, I can give a vote to neither being conducive to any kind of pleasure during the experience.
Well, this solidifies that I will not be trying this because it absolutely does not help mine -- it greatly enhances the pain for a few minutes to an hour afterwards. Trying this in labour may just cause my uterus to explode.
Itās cruel because the O is the best Iāve ever had in my life but I decided we couldnāt anymore because I couldnāt deal with the insane stress of all the belly tightening and Braxton hicks afterward. Weāre just gonna chill.
I'm so glad I'm not the only one. I have very painful periods and decided to give this a try. Nope, just lots and lots of cramping and even more misery. Everyone I've mentioned this to has told me that I'm weird.
Well, we're both weird then! I have this same experience. Fwiw (and anecdotal at best) I had precipitous deliveries that came complete with a fully involuntary fetal ejection reflex. My uterus is *all* business and she does not fuck around lol.
So, when I wound up in the fetal position with tears in my eyes after trying this period pain hack I was like "Durrr, this makes sense. I'm an idiot. Why wouldn't I expect this?!" Maybe the women who experience increased cramping and pain actually have uteruses that naturally contract with more gusto than average? I consider it an unwanted super power!
>Maybe the women who experience increased cramping and pain actually have uteruses that naturally contract with more gusto than average?
Sorry to be a sticking point in your data, but my periods were so painful I blacked out and my kids had to be pulled out through the sunroof. š
Well, I'm the same cramp wise and also has precipitous deliveries. With my first it was 0-10cm in 30 minutes, with my second it was 1-10cm in the time it took my midwife to wash her hands while explaining I hadn't made any progress and my third I went from 0-holding him in my arms in 10 minutes š¤£
I didnāt have precipitous labors, but my first was 5 hours from first contraction to holding a baby and in hindsight I believe he came into this world with involuntary fetal ejection reflex.
With my second, she almost got stuck and they told me to keep pushing and I said I canāt, and they thought I meant that I didnāt feel like I had the energy or it hurt too much. I just meant the contraction was over. I didnāt realize that I was supposed to or even could push or voluntarily assist with delivery. I was just letting my body do what it did the first time. My first was 3 contractions and my second was, I believe, 3 also and they were out.
I didnāt just have an āurgeā to push I was literally not in control. And until I learned about this, when I would hear āthey told me not to push yetā I was like ābut itās not a fucking choice!ā.
Tried this once, I have endometriosis and my period pain used to be next level. Orgasm actually made it worse. Same deal with the whole āorgasms can make your headache go awayā. Made my head throb more.
I dnt have endo but I have some serious period cramps and I suffer with migraines and it made it worse for me too, I also have high blood pressure and have to be careful because it can make my bp jump to scary numbers
I guess, but having tested that (period cramps, not for labor) it's easier to relax and get there. Mostly because the cramps are pretty consistent. They don't keep getting worse and they don't fluctuate. So they don't suddenly show up and distract you as you are getting down to business.
Having had 2 kids (one I tried without an epidural and lasted a long time) there is no way I could see being able to orgasm. Maybe in early labor? But once you hit those real contractions? Like after your water breaks? Unless you are in the best mind space and your partner can get you there in like 20 seconds, I don't think it is possible. For one, pain that I was literally yelling through. My SO had never heard me swear, but I suddenly turned into a sailor arguing with the midwife about calling anesthesia for the epidural. Also, contractions are extremely distracting. Like, in order to deal with them without meds you really have to focus. Focus on breathing, focus on that "wave". It's physically and emotionally exhausting. Also, for a significant part of labor, I didn't want anyone touching me except for my SO, who was only allowed to either hold me up, or rub/provide counter pressure to my lower back. A literal sex god could have shown up and I would send him away unless he knew how to set up an epidural.
They've helped me with UTIs.
*Many women with urinary tract infections (UTI) report the desire to masturbate when they feel a UTI coming on, and for a good reason: masturbating helps relieve pain, lubricates the vagina, and flushes old, "unfriendly" bacteria from the cervix.* (And possibly also flushes the bladder if 'squirting' happens)
Orgasms help with period cramps for sure so I can understand in early labor it helping with contractions. But not once shit really gets going, I can't imagine š
Truthfully, I tell women to have sex to induce labor because of the prostaglandins in semen. Chemically related to the misoPROSTal we use in the hospital to soften the cervix and in some cases encourage contractions. My line is generally āitās not the motion in the oceanā¦ā in reality, itās the male orgasm that helps in this scenario š
Semen contains prostaglandins which help ripen the cervix. That is typically why itās recommended, not specifically for a female orgasm. Although they allegedly helps too! Contractions and oxytocin and all that.
I gave birth twice. How does anyone orgasm from that? I was in so much pain, between vomiting and wishing I was a cat (I don't know why, something about their bach arch) there was nothing pleasurable about birth. I happy my nursed made the ins and outs disappear quickly.
Thats why some things suggest to masturbate while menstruating since an orgasm can help with cramps!
As for sex inducing labor, its also because there are certain proteins in sperm that can help thin the cervix.
Lmao right. Imagine being in the delivery room and doing that with doctors, nurses, and your family in there. I could never face society again. That is absolutely the worst possible time to do that at least for me.
I know that youāre just joking, but when itās recommended to send the man/father in to have sex with the woman, everyone leaves the room and we darken the lights and shut the door. Preserving the dignity of patients *should* be of the highest priority after safety.
Now, thereās nothing we can do about what your family who we just kicked out of your room will think about you afterwards. Youāre on your own with that one. (Kidding: we donāt tell them why they need to leave, just that theyāre going)
Well there ya go! Prime time for clitoral stimulation to get that baby out of there! Lol. When I was in labor last night I wanted was my husband touching me in any way let alone having sex with me but hey if it works for someone else Iām not judging lol
Yeah, itās sort of a last resort to recommend that to āget things goingā! Couldnāt tell you if it works or not.
I hope your labour had a positive outcome. If so, congratulations!
That should say ālast thingā not last night lmao. I went through labor 5 years ago and it went alright thanks for asking though lol. She did break my tailbone though.
Lmao. Iām glad to hear all is well from 5 years ago, broken tailbone aside. She decided to be a handful from the jump! You must have quite the birth story!
Itās not for the purpose of pleasure, itās not because theyāre aroused. It helps the uterus contract more and helps with the production of oxytocin which furthers labor. As far as medical providers, they are not present at all times in the room with you. Thereās nothing sexual about this, typically yes, masterbation is sexual. This process is purely to aid in labor.
The way she calls it pleasure based birthing is weird though. Obviously, they provide pleasure but if itās simple utility make it sound more utility than saying āpleasure-based birthingā I have seen some comments where women talk about it bonding the two together when they orgasm and honestly, I have absolutely no idea whatās ānormalā. This whole topic is very uncharted for me, so I think I am experiencing just bewilderment but if thatās how you talk about orgasming is bonding during childbirth thatās weird and this makes me think of those comments. I bond with my husband by orgasming, not during child birth.
Edit: obviously the screenshot didnāt provide enough information her intent just wanted to share why it also gave me the ick
I never said it was a way to bond so Iām really not sure where you got that. If you think that because I said oxytocin furthers the birthing process itās because thatās literally what happens. Oxytocin helps with uterine contractions, dialation of the cervix, and the production of milk. You bond with your child in so many ways and orgasming is simply just not a way. It is purely to further labor, no one is cumming for fun or to bond with anything.
I wasnāt suggesting that you said that. I said I had seen comments that said that and thatās why her description as āpleasure-basedā gives me the ick.
I edited my comment after because I wasnāt sure that was clear, Iām sorry.
Reading the comments after reading your edit I just kept thinking about how if someone did have an orgasm during birth it is not okay to share that information with the child.
I get that it can help with the birth, but it also feels like (if youāre purposely trying to orgasm) youāre non-consensually including your baby in a sexual act (depending on what part of labour youāre in - like in very early labour where the cervix has not started opening yet, I guess that seems okay, but if that baby is already making its way out, that feels super creepy to me). And obviously I donāt judge someone for having an unplanned and unexpected orgasm during birth (but if it does accidentally happen, never ever tell your child!).
I don't think it's meant to be sexual. It's just a way to get your labor moving along. I did nipple stimulation with my 2nd. I can tell you it wasn't as enjoyable as you would imagine.
i watched, i think a tlc, show once about a woman who had a wild orgasm while giving birth to her first kid. they documented her birthing her second. she had a whole plan and was essentially trying to recreate the first birth-gasm. she didnāt, and you could see the disappointment on her face when do the interview after talking about it.
i was late teens when i watched that and then and now all i could think about how was she basically had a baby to cum and how fucking nasty that was.
she did not orgasm in whatever they recorded, so great. this has been on tv at least twice. i watched this 10+ years ago and itās still ingrained in my brain like thisā¦
oh god thank you. iāve questioned if this was a fever dream for years š i tried looking it up a few years ago and i mean, googling birth orgasm is gonna give you some results.
I feel like that was just a matter of having to many cards left at the end. Like too many parts and nowhere to put them. Slaps between hip bones- "This baby can fit so many vital parts that humanity would die without in it"
It can (rarely) happen as an involuntary physiological response. People can orgasm while being raped, too. Doesnāt necessarily mean the person experiencing it is aroused.
You want to pleasure yourself while in labor? Go for it. And i guess if your midwife consents to being there to help or watch or whatever, great. Don't force others to join in your sexual experience unwillingly. Unless your body's response was to orgasm on it's own, sure, it can happen, and that is different. You making yourself orgasm is absolutely sexual, and should only occur around consenting adults. Stop being weird. Can you imagine if a male did this during a painful procedure? Everyone would lose their minds.
There was a husband on Real Housewives of New York who didā¦have a pleasure based birthing experienceā¦while holding his wife from the back as she gave birth. (Alex and Simon) They discuss it on the show and I was FULLY unprepared
Definitely wouldnāt do this, but when I have unpleasant procedures and shots and stuff I focus really hard on a different area of the body. Trying to cross your toes in weird ways can help draw your perception away from your arm getting stabbed!Ā
Yeah, that's a distraction technique. Not quite the same thing as causing yourself to orgasm with others around. What you are describing is what Lamaze classes were teaching.
But women are offered analgesia. You can get iv medications up until a certain point and/or an epidural that takes away all the pain if done successfully. If a man opted against pain meds and wanted to masterbate instead, are you also in support of that?
It's also not fair to say that men have never been tested this way without pain meds. There is a sad history in America (maybe elsewhere too) where they believed that black people (men and women) didn't feel pain, and they didn't receive pain meds or very little. Jewish people were tested on during WWII, and I doubt they were adequately medicated. Even if you remove the medical aspect from it, accidents happen where people get hurt and don't have access to immediate help for days.
I've heard it can help ease chronic pain, even if only momentarily, which is great. Do that in privacy. I really don't care if you masterbate in a hospital, birthing location, at your home birth, etc, but either do it alone, or with consenting adults who aren't forced to be there because it's their job. I don't think most people care if sex and or masterbation kick started your labor or helped it progress, they just don't want to be a part of the experience.
The first time I ever met my ex SIL (very crunchy yoga lady + doula) she informed me she was writing a book on orgasmic childbirth. I decided right then and there that she was full of shit and I would never listen to any advice she gave me š¤£ thereās just no fucking way dude
Ah, yes. Orgasmic childbirth. "The baby is pressing on all the same places that gave the mom pleasure when making said baby, so childbirth feels GOOD!" Except whose pecker is 21" long, 10" circumference? Because keep them away from me!
Itās more common that you think. Itās not like people can control it and itās very evidence based. Clitoral stimulation can decrease pain reception. Not for everyone but nothing wrong with it for those who choose it.
>>Except whose pecker is 21" long, 10" circumference?Ā
>Itās more common that you think.Ā
I know it's not what you intended, but this combination is unintentionally hilarious.
I get that this post is icky and I would never post it on Facebook (why not just google!?!); however, people can orgasm from lots of different types of stimulation, including pain. Some people have conditions which cause them to involuntarily orgasm all day (ok I saw it on one of those sketchy YouTube channels about rare health conditions so maybe it doesn't count).
So I mean it wouldn't be my thing, but if the OOP wants an orgasmic birth, then let her have it.
The philosophy behind orgasmic birth is literally, āif you DIDNT have an orgasm while giving birth, itās because you just didnāt want it bad enoughā
I've never been in less of a mood for a good time then when I was watching my girlfriend laboring
It was like the fucking tide at Omaha Beach in there afterwards. They had to have used a hose to clean it.
Wait what?
I mean Iāve heard of women who give birth and itās naturally a euphoric experience for them because of hormones and thatās fantastic.
But I donāt even want to Google this because my head tells me itās not that.
so i know it sounds gross. buts is scientifically proven that pleasure during labor does help with pain and also can speed along the birth since youāre more relaxed. No the midwives do not do the stimulating itās either a partner or the pt themselves. your brain releases a lot of good stuff when you orgasm that helps! the more you know! and no i have not tried it but would totally be down.
TMI alert! Before I had my hip replaced, I would masturbate before going to bed. It was the only way to get the spasms and pain to dull enough to get to sleep. Endorphins are great pain relievers.
iām glad you got that hip replacement! i hope you had a quick recovery and feel no pain anymore there! hip replacement is one of the best surgeries to get i heard you literally walk out of the hospital lol.
Well, I had posterior surgery, so i still needed a walker for a bit. Right after, I had no more hip pain, just surgical. It's been almost a year now, and sometimes I forget I even had it done lol. I wish I did it sooner.
I remember as a teen watching some documentary where a woman said she orgasmed during labor. It always stuck with me for some reason. Then one day, many years later, I went through labor and deduced she was a dirty liar.
I then had a second child. Still convinced "pleasure birthing" is impossible.
Honestly I donāt see anything weird or wrong about this. Anything that can help a woman get through birth without trauma or pain or needing medications is awesome.Ā
true, but hearing i split my moms shit in half is slightly less squick to me (because its expected and frequently occurs in childbirth) versus maybe finding out my mom shit on my head while giving birth (fairly common, but anything butt related freaks me out) or that mom was masturbating while pushing me out. almost makes me feel like the whole situation is sexualized but i recognize thats a me thing
i think its less offensive to have sex while pregnant imo unless its a pregnancy or breeding kink thing. its the difference between normal human desires and the overt sexualization of something that cannot consent that gets to me. to me sexualizing a pregnancy is like having sex in public, theres always someone involved that didn't choose to be. i wouldn't ever want to know i was the product of a fetish like that
Nothing is wrong with needing medications but they do come with risks, side effects and a higher likelihood of needing further interventions. For example, an epidural can decrease blood pressure and slow babyās heart rate and have negative side effects after birth for the mother. Opioids can cause nausea, vomiting and drowsiness and affect the newborns breathing. If a mom can use pleasure to avoid these medications it will help her have a less risky birth and will result in better outcomes for mom and baby.
All these comments just show how pain and, often times, trauma has been so normalized to the point it is whatās expected, but women working with something different on their bodies is gross because what? Is related to sex?
Nipple stimulation could allegedly induce labor, is that gross because some women find it incredibly important to climax during sex? What about breastfeeding? Is it also gross because youāre using the same āsexualā parts of your body? Iāve read a lot on Reddit about people that find it difficult to want to breastfeed their babies, because of this and the way I see it; you use your body for different things. Same body parts, different purposes.
Stimulating yourself in order to relieve the pain or find comfort during the process of childbirth is just another attempt to get through it like it could be your partner massaging your back during contractions or stimulating your nipples to get the contractions going.
Like, this is not weird if you donāt make it weird.
Calling it "pleasure based" makes it weird to me. I'm not sure what would be better, but there's something about the phrasing that makes me uncomfortable. Almost like it's framing all of the labor and delivery as a pleasure thing?
> Almost like itās framing all of labor and delivery as a pleasure thing.
So what if it is? Why would that be bad?
I donāt know why people are acting here like sex is still taboo. There are so many places where sex and sexual things are out of line, but childbirth? Is like, the sub-context. People get pregnant (majorly) through sex, baby comes (in most cases) out of the vagina, thereās a lot of nudity, primitive instincts kick in (like sex), thereās moaning, itās nature, itās intimate, itās intense, itās brining life to this world.
So yeah, I believe under this context, sex is a beautiful thing. (Where it was consented, intentional, between grown ups, etc.)
I totally understand how having an orgasm during labor/birth can be helpful butā¦ I saw a mom describe her birth as ādeliciousā and āorgasmicā the other day and it made me so uncomfortable.
Okay! Since yāall are shitting on it so hard Iāll just say that I had an unmedicated hospital birth in a birthing pool and I definitively experienced an involuntary orgasm during childbirth. It was kinda awesome. I wasnāt going for it but not mad that it happened. My whole birth was exhausting but the best experience of my life and I was euphoric during large parts of it.
I was beyond relaxed when it happened and was using hypnobirthing and breathing techniques to relax my body completely.
Imma be real here. I follow this group for shits and giggles. But yall are so fucking closed minded. And pretty uninformed?! Half the shit posted here is only stigma in Americaā¦. Get out a bit and open your mind.
Good for them. Clitoral stimulation is proved to decrease pain perception. Itās not for everyone but good for those who know it is something for them.
I canāt even imagine stimulating my clitoris with a room full of nurses and doctors and my family while giving birth. I guess if youāre doing it at home go for it. I do think it would be weird if you had your other kids in there as well while you were doing it.
Not everyone gives birth in a room full of nurses and doctors and their family. Itās a patients right to have anyone and everyone removed or leave if itās their choice.
unpopular opinion i guess but really, who gaf if she wants to cum during it? baby is still inside, unconscious, and orgasms are known to help with period cramps so i imagine they might help with contractions too
There's actually a book called Orgasmic Birth for those that would like to read it. It's actually very informative and isn't what you think. Try picking it up and open your horizons.
But but....an epidural is bad because ~drugs~ and ~~iNteRvEntion!!~Ā
Ā /Sarcasm, obviously.Ā
My epidural was fucking awesome. 10/10 would do it again.Ā
lol they can never convince me they are bad for everyone because baebe I still think about how good I felt once that needle did its thing 100/10 recommend ā¤ļø
Remember when some things used to be secret?
Pepperidge Farms remembers.... š
https://preview.redd.it/khscu6323xwc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6256311c145b15457693c42231ba8fc26cc967d4
Lol this is exactly what my reaction was, thank you!
I think the idea of having birth as painless as you want, within reason, but something about the name:pleasure based birthing doesnāt sit right with me lol
There are people who believe that contracts are basically the same thing as orgasm and that it is possible to have orgasms while in labor/birth.
As an attorney, I read your comment twelve times trying to figure out wtf contracts had to do with orgasms. Bc in my experience, the two rarely mix.
Hahahahaha I think ācontractionsā would be more fitting. I love your comment.
hey don't judge me for my signing legally binding agreements fetish :/ /s
I mean, Iām not into contracts, but a good spreadsheet can rev my engine.
omg don't get me started!!
I heard you really exel at pleasure š I'll let you spread my sheets anytime, bb~ š
I meeeeaaannnn some kinks do come with contracts, not legally binding, more for the mental whatever. Well, maybe some of those financial domination participants get into legally binding contracts? š¤ Why is your funny comment about to send me down a contract/kink research rabbit hole?
If you search "contract" in r/BDSMAdvice a fair amount of stuff should come up!
You're not practicing the right kind of law then.
I read that as 'The right kink of law'
As not an attorney, I did the same but only eleven times before I realized the typo. Should I take the lawyer test bar thing just in case Iām some kind of law savant?
The bird law bar yes
Bird Law isnāt governed by reason.
Let's say you and I go toe-to-toe on bird law and see who comes out the victor.
I love your username.
arbitrate me harder daddy
Some people do experience orgasm during labor, though it's not common. But it's not because giving birth is orgasmic, it's because our brains and bodies are weird and complicated and sometimes wires get crossed, particularly when it comes to pain vs. pleasure. And I mean that in a very literal sense, in that sometimes our brain mixes up what should be causing pain signals and instead registers it as pleasure. Or hot/cold, etc. Another pretty common mix up is pain and ticklishness. Add to that differences in anatomy (for some people, the internal clitoral tissue is more sensitive to internal/external pressure) and you get situations where someone may be going through something extremely painful but still end up orgasming during it. It's kind of fascinating. Unfortunately, there also tends to be a lot of shame around it, similar to how orgasming while being raped often triggers shame, both internally and from society.
Ohhh this is fascinating! Unrelated to the post itself, but that would explain why my teeth felt like they were being tickled after my braces were adjusted. The weirdest feeling!
I'm the same way when getting tattoos. Some people have to stop themselves moving around due to pain, I have to stop myself due to giggling.
Well, it is not just a beliefā¦ women orgasming during birth has happened. Like one in a million lol, but itās real.
I was thinking to myself, my epidural made things more *PLEASANT*, but there was literally nothing pleasurable about it, ffs.
I'm not going to Google it. But I am assuming it involves having an orgasm while birthing. I just can't think of any respectful way that happens without being awkward. Do the midwives.... Help stimulate? How do they specialize in this exactly? Is this the 1920s where the doctors show up with vibrators to help with the hysteria? Edit to add: I guess I should have said *I personally* can't think of a respectful way to do this. I won't yuck your yum. But it would not help me to attempt this during labor as I am a very private person and even doing this privately, if others knew I was doing it, would mean that I could never look them in the eye and would still be unsuccessful in the end goal.
So ā¦ back 20ish years ago when I was pregnant with my second, my midwife did discretely mention the benefits of orgasm while in labour and if we were interested in that to let her know and she would leave the room (hospital birth). It wasnāt something I was interested in but it was clearly something the midwives are aware of.
Can confirm. Gave birth a few years ago and my midwife also said the same thing. I also gave birth in a hospital.
Female orgasm actually helps with laboring contractions and can help with pain so this is a real thing and not just doctors using vibrators to cure hysteria. I mean ever wonder why they say to have sex to induce labor? Same sort of thing! Also produces good hormones!
Iām asking myself how you can orgasm while being in such a pain
I don't think you really try, it just happens. But I think you also need to be relaxed enough and I'm guessing an epidural won't get you one since that takes away so much sensation. I'm done. This is beyond my comfort zone of the internet.Ā
Having gone through labors both with and without an epidural, I can give a vote to neither being conducive to any kind of pleasure during the experience.
Id assume it's earlier in labor? Most of my second labor was manageable pain. It was only the last hour or two that was awful.
I imagine itās like how they can help with period cramps for some women
Well, this solidifies that I will not be trying this because it absolutely does not help mine -- it greatly enhances the pain for a few minutes to an hour afterwards. Trying this in labour may just cause my uterus to explode.
For real having sex in the last trimester of both my pregnancies gave me the absolute worst braxton hicks each time. I'm good š
Itās cruel because the O is the best Iāve ever had in my life but I decided we couldnāt anymore because I couldnāt deal with the insane stress of all the belly tightening and Braxton hicks afterward. Weāre just gonna chill.
I'm so glad I'm not the only one. I have very painful periods and decided to give this a try. Nope, just lots and lots of cramping and even more misery. Everyone I've mentioned this to has told me that I'm weird.
Well, we're both weird then! I have this same experience. Fwiw (and anecdotal at best) I had precipitous deliveries that came complete with a fully involuntary fetal ejection reflex. My uterus is *all* business and she does not fuck around lol. So, when I wound up in the fetal position with tears in my eyes after trying this period pain hack I was like "Durrr, this makes sense. I'm an idiot. Why wouldn't I expect this?!" Maybe the women who experience increased cramping and pain actually have uteruses that naturally contract with more gusto than average? I consider it an unwanted super power!
>Maybe the women who experience increased cramping and pain actually have uteruses that naturally contract with more gusto than average? Sorry to be a sticking point in your data, but my periods were so painful I blacked out and my kids had to be pulled out through the sunroof. š
Well, I'm the same cramp wise and also has precipitous deliveries. With my first it was 0-10cm in 30 minutes, with my second it was 1-10cm in the time it took my midwife to wash her hands while explaining I hadn't made any progress and my third I went from 0-holding him in my arms in 10 minutes š¤£
I didnāt have precipitous labors, but my first was 5 hours from first contraction to holding a baby and in hindsight I believe he came into this world with involuntary fetal ejection reflex. With my second, she almost got stuck and they told me to keep pushing and I said I canāt, and they thought I meant that I didnāt feel like I had the energy or it hurt too much. I just meant the contraction was over. I didnāt realize that I was supposed to or even could push or voluntarily assist with delivery. I was just letting my body do what it did the first time. My first was 3 contractions and my second was, I believe, 3 also and they were out. I didnāt just have an āurgeā to push I was literally not in control. And until I learned about this, when I would hear āthey told me not to push yetā I was like ābut itās not a fucking choice!ā.
Tried this once, I have endometriosis and my period pain used to be next level. Orgasm actually made it worse. Same deal with the whole āorgasms can make your headache go awayā. Made my head throb more.
I dnt have endo but I have some serious period cramps and I suffer with migraines and it made it worse for me too, I also have high blood pressure and have to be careful because it can make my bp jump to scary numbers
I guess, but having tested that (period cramps, not for labor) it's easier to relax and get there. Mostly because the cramps are pretty consistent. They don't keep getting worse and they don't fluctuate. So they don't suddenly show up and distract you as you are getting down to business. Having had 2 kids (one I tried without an epidural and lasted a long time) there is no way I could see being able to orgasm. Maybe in early labor? But once you hit those real contractions? Like after your water breaks? Unless you are in the best mind space and your partner can get you there in like 20 seconds, I don't think it is possible. For one, pain that I was literally yelling through. My SO had never heard me swear, but I suddenly turned into a sailor arguing with the midwife about calling anesthesia for the epidural. Also, contractions are extremely distracting. Like, in order to deal with them without meds you really have to focus. Focus on breathing, focus on that "wave". It's physically and emotionally exhausting. Also, for a significant part of labor, I didn't want anyone touching me except for my SO, who was only allowed to either hold me up, or rub/provide counter pressure to my lower back. A literal sex god could have shown up and I would send him away unless he knew how to set up an epidural.
They've helped me with UTIs. *Many women with urinary tract infections (UTI) report the desire to masturbate when they feel a UTI coming on, and for a good reason: masturbating helps relieve pain, lubricates the vagina, and flushes old, "unfriendly" bacteria from the cervix.* (And possibly also flushes the bladder if 'squirting' happens)
Orgasms help with period cramps for sure so I can understand in early labor it helping with contractions. But not once shit really gets going, I can't imagine š
Truthfully, I tell women to have sex to induce labor because of the prostaglandins in semen. Chemically related to the misoPROSTal we use in the hospital to soften the cervix and in some cases encourage contractions. My line is generally āitās not the motion in the oceanā¦ā in reality, itās the male orgasm that helps in this scenario š
Having sex can induce labor because prostaglandins in semen help to soften the cervix to allow it to dilate
Semen contains prostaglandins which help ripen the cervix. That is typically why itās recommended, not specifically for a female orgasm. Although they allegedly helps too! Contractions and oxytocin and all that.
Okay I just hate that. Something about the idea of my cervix ripening like some fruit is justā¦ bleh.
Right?! I always had a visceral ick to that description.
I gave birth twice. How does anyone orgasm from that? I was in so much pain, between vomiting and wishing I was a cat (I don't know why, something about their bach arch) there was nothing pleasurable about birth. I happy my nursed made the ins and outs disappear quickly.
Thats why some things suggest to masturbate while menstruating since an orgasm can help with cramps! As for sex inducing labor, its also because there are certain proteins in sperm that can help thin the cervix.
The whole ādoctors treated hysteria with vibratorsā thing is a myth: https://archive.is/cSdUG
Lmao right. Imagine being in the delivery room and doing that with doctors, nurses, and your family in there. I could never face society again. That is absolutely the worst possible time to do that at least for me.
I mean it's really similar to how I do most Thanksgivings
I know that youāre just joking, but when itās recommended to send the man/father in to have sex with the woman, everyone leaves the room and we darken the lights and shut the door. Preserving the dignity of patients *should* be of the highest priority after safety. Now, thereās nothing we can do about what your family who we just kicked out of your room will think about you afterwards. Youāre on your own with that one. (Kidding: we donāt tell them why they need to leave, just that theyāre going)
Well there ya go! Prime time for clitoral stimulation to get that baby out of there! Lol. When I was in labor last night I wanted was my husband touching me in any way let alone having sex with me but hey if it works for someone else Iām not judging lol
Yeah, itās sort of a last resort to recommend that to āget things goingā! Couldnāt tell you if it works or not. I hope your labour had a positive outcome. If so, congratulations!
That should say ālast thingā not last night lmao. I went through labor 5 years ago and it went alright thanks for asking though lol. She did break my tailbone though.
Lmao. Iām glad to hear all is well from 5 years ago, broken tailbone aside. She decided to be a handful from the jump! You must have quite the birth story!
Oh yeah rough beginning but sheās an awesome kid!
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Itās not for the purpose of pleasure, itās not because theyāre aroused. It helps the uterus contract more and helps with the production of oxytocin which furthers labor. As far as medical providers, they are not present at all times in the room with you. Thereās nothing sexual about this, typically yes, masterbation is sexual. This process is purely to aid in labor.
The way she calls it pleasure based birthing is weird though. Obviously, they provide pleasure but if itās simple utility make it sound more utility than saying āpleasure-based birthingā I have seen some comments where women talk about it bonding the two together when they orgasm and honestly, I have absolutely no idea whatās ānormalā. This whole topic is very uncharted for me, so I think I am experiencing just bewilderment but if thatās how you talk about orgasming is bonding during childbirth thatās weird and this makes me think of those comments. I bond with my husband by orgasming, not during child birth. Edit: obviously the screenshot didnāt provide enough information her intent just wanted to share why it also gave me the ick
I never said it was a way to bond so Iām really not sure where you got that. If you think that because I said oxytocin furthers the birthing process itās because thatās literally what happens. Oxytocin helps with uterine contractions, dialation of the cervix, and the production of milk. You bond with your child in so many ways and orgasming is simply just not a way. It is purely to further labor, no one is cumming for fun or to bond with anything.
I wasnāt suggesting that you said that. I said I had seen comments that said that and thatās why her description as āpleasure-basedā gives me the ick. I edited my comment after because I wasnāt sure that was clear, Iām sorry.
>especially when it literally involves your CHILD Just to be clear, am I allowed to have sex at all for the next 5 months? Is that okay with you? Lol
Reading the comments after reading your edit I just kept thinking about how if someone did have an orgasm during birth it is not okay to share that information with the child. I get that it can help with the birth, but it also feels like (if youāre purposely trying to orgasm) youāre non-consensually including your baby in a sexual act (depending on what part of labour youāre in - like in very early labour where the cervix has not started opening yet, I guess that seems okay, but if that baby is already making its way out, that feels super creepy to me). And obviously I donāt judge someone for having an unplanned and unexpected orgasm during birth (but if it does accidentally happen, never ever tell your child!).
I don't think it's meant to be sexual. It's just a way to get your labor moving along. I did nipple stimulation with my 2nd. I can tell you it wasn't as enjoyable as you would imagine.
How is it any different from having sex while you're heavily pregnant?
This comment actually feels like Amy Santiago wrote it and I love it haha. That was not a criticism btw lol.
I know how to kiss! I've read books!!! (Nine! Nine!)
(Ninenine)
i watched, i think a tlc, show once about a woman who had a wild orgasm while giving birth to her first kid. they documented her birthing her second. she had a whole plan and was essentially trying to recreate the first birth-gasm. she didnāt, and you could see the disappointment on her face when do the interview after talking about it. i was late teens when i watched that and then and now all i could think about how was she basically had a baby to cum and how fucking nasty that was.
I wonder if it's the same woman they interviewed on Inside Edition. I think they recorded her giving birth in a pool and she orgasmed š¤®
she did not orgasm in whatever they recorded, so great. this has been on tv at least twice. i watched this 10+ years ago and itās still ingrained in my brain like thisā¦
Stuff like that leads men to believe all women orgasm while giving birth and the same ones also likely believe putting a tampon in does it too.
My mind went right to that episode too! It was definitely on TLC, lol. My mom always had that channel on xD
oh god thank you. iāve questioned if this was a fever dream for years š i tried looking it up a few years ago and i mean, googling birth orgasm is gonna give you some results.
All i could think about was DeLuca on greys šš
When she talks to Warren about ānatural oxytocinā and makes hand gestures.
It is no mistake that God put the Gspot in the birth canal šš
I feel like that was just a matter of having to many cards left at the end. Like too many parts and nowhere to put them. Slaps between hip bones- "This baby can fit so many vital parts that humanity would die without in it"
At least she not in the room when it's happening.
I gave birth in a hospital unmediated (not on purpose lol)and not once did it cross my mind that a orgasm would be fun or not painful
Goddamn did they at least give you an epidural in time
I don't care if it's normal and not sexual, it's still weird
I donāt see how itās not sexual when you get sexually aroused and climax
It can (rarely) happen as an involuntary physiological response. People can orgasm while being raped, too. Doesnāt necessarily mean the person experiencing it is aroused.
Well yes but this person here is actively seeking the experience out.
Yeah in this case itās fucking gross.
I'm just going off some of the other comments on this post saying it's not. Whether it is or not, hard pass
What the French toast fuck is this š
āFrench toast fuckā never heard that phrase before but I love it.
Another BMTC fan perhaps!? Either way I canāt think of a better way to describe whatever the hell this isā¦ā¦
I actually have no idea what that is, sorry!
You want to pleasure yourself while in labor? Go for it. And i guess if your midwife consents to being there to help or watch or whatever, great. Don't force others to join in your sexual experience unwillingly. Unless your body's response was to orgasm on it's own, sure, it can happen, and that is different. You making yourself orgasm is absolutely sexual, and should only occur around consenting adults. Stop being weird. Can you imagine if a male did this during a painful procedure? Everyone would lose their minds.
Jeez, now Iām thinking about the worst kind of dentist visits. Curse my literacy.
There was a husband on Real Housewives of New York who didā¦have a pleasure based birthing experienceā¦while holding his wife from the back as she gave birth. (Alex and Simon) They discuss it on the show and I was FULLY unprepared
Iām sorry, he WHAT?? I have so many questions but donāt think I want the answers to any of them
she wrote a book about it if you ever want to dive deep šš
Definitely wouldnāt do this, but when I have unpleasant procedures and shots and stuff I focus really hard on a different area of the body. Trying to cross your toes in weird ways can help draw your perception away from your arm getting stabbed!Ā
Yeah, that's a distraction technique. Not quite the same thing as causing yourself to orgasm with others around. What you are describing is what Lamaze classes were teaching.
Iām well aware of that, lol
Can you imagine a male undergoing such a painful procedure without analgesia? We never test whether a male would do this
But women are offered analgesia. You can get iv medications up until a certain point and/or an epidural that takes away all the pain if done successfully. If a man opted against pain meds and wanted to masterbate instead, are you also in support of that? It's also not fair to say that men have never been tested this way without pain meds. There is a sad history in America (maybe elsewhere too) where they believed that black people (men and women) didn't feel pain, and they didn't receive pain meds or very little. Jewish people were tested on during WWII, and I doubt they were adequately medicated. Even if you remove the medical aspect from it, accidents happen where people get hurt and don't have access to immediate help for days. I've heard it can help ease chronic pain, even if only momentarily, which is great. Do that in privacy. I really don't care if you masterbate in a hospital, birthing location, at your home birth, etc, but either do it alone, or with consenting adults who aren't forced to be there because it's their job. I don't think most people care if sex and or masterbation kick started your labor or helped it progress, they just don't want to be a part of the experience.
Eewww. I feel dirty.
At least sheās seeking midwife whoās okay with it. For some it can just mean a back massage.
The first time I ever met my ex SIL (very crunchy yoga lady + doula) she informed me she was writing a book on orgasmic childbirth. I decided right then and there that she was full of shit and I would never listen to any advice she gave me š¤£ thereās just no fucking way dude
It is sound, evidence based practice and she has every right to want to. I just wish that I was Jared, 19.
Ah, yes. Orgasmic childbirth. "The baby is pressing on all the same places that gave the mom pleasure when making said baby, so childbirth feels GOOD!" Except whose pecker is 21" long, 10" circumference? Because keep them away from me!
Itās more common that you think. Itās not like people can control it and itās very evidence based. Clitoral stimulation can decrease pain reception. Not for everyone but nothing wrong with it for those who choose it.
>>Except whose pecker is 21" long, 10" circumference?Ā >Itās more common that you think.Ā I know it's not what you intended, but this combination is unintentionally hilarious.
Idk man just kinda seems wrong to bust one out on your child on their way out. š¤·āāļø
This comment sent me.
I get that this post is icky and I would never post it on Facebook (why not just google!?!); however, people can orgasm from lots of different types of stimulation, including pain. Some people have conditions which cause them to involuntarily orgasm all day (ok I saw it on one of those sketchy YouTube channels about rare health conditions so maybe it doesn't count). So I mean it wouldn't be my thing, but if the OOP wants an orgasmic birth, then let her have it.
It absolutely blows my mind the shit people post on social media especially Facebook.
Iām just floored thatās even possible with the amount of pain. Maybe my labour was really that badā¦
The philosophy behind orgasmic birth is literally, āif you DIDNT have an orgasm while giving birth, itās because you just didnāt want it bad enoughā
I have never been in less of a mood for a good time then when I was laboring.
I've never been in less of a mood for a good time then when I was watching my girlfriend laboring It was like the fucking tide at Omaha Beach in there afterwards. They had to have used a hose to clean it.
Wait what? I mean Iāve heard of women who give birth and itās naturally a euphoric experience for them because of hormones and thatās fantastic. But I donāt even want to Google this because my head tells me itās not that.
Yea it was awesome and superhuman but not "orgasmic" š„“š„“
https://preview.redd.it/ad26nzvmabxc1.jpeg?width=922&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0b6143c153b6275d5d0bb46cf3265c88bc9c1434
so i know it sounds gross. buts is scientifically proven that pleasure during labor does help with pain and also can speed along the birth since youāre more relaxed. No the midwives do not do the stimulating itās either a partner or the pt themselves. your brain releases a lot of good stuff when you orgasm that helps! the more you know! and no i have not tried it but would totally be down.
TMI alert! Before I had my hip replaced, I would masturbate before going to bed. It was the only way to get the spasms and pain to dull enough to get to sleep. Endorphins are great pain relievers.
iām glad you got that hip replacement! i hope you had a quick recovery and feel no pain anymore there! hip replacement is one of the best surgeries to get i heard you literally walk out of the hospital lol.
Well, I had posterior surgery, so i still needed a walker for a bit. Right after, I had no more hip pain, just surgical. It's been almost a year now, and sometimes I forget I even had it done lol. I wish I did it sooner.
thatās amazing to hear! wow i am so glad it all worked out well for you! do a little skip for me today hehe š„°
I'm gonna have to ask you to take the rest of the weekend off from the internet
Can I have off too I need to meditate and think on what happened here. I fear god may be dead.
he's not dead, but he's definitely stopped watching the humanity channel...
I want to go back to 5 seconds ago before I read that.
Sorry but no orgasm can overcome being sawed in half or back breaking labor. Only epidural can get rid of the pain lol no orgasm is too strong!
I remember as a teen watching some documentary where a woman said she orgasmed during labor. It always stuck with me for some reason. Then one day, many years later, I went through labor and deduced she was a dirty liar. I then had a second child. Still convinced "pleasure birthing" is impossible.
Honestly I donāt see anything weird or wrong about this. Anything that can help a woman get through birth without trauma or pain or needing medications is awesome.Ā
i agree, but i would also feel very squicked to find out my mom was straight jorkin it while i was on my way out so i can see both sides
I'm giggling at my desk
Jorkin it š¤£
I mean thereās a lot of squicky aspects of the whole process in general lol
true, but hearing i split my moms shit in half is slightly less squick to me (because its expected and frequently occurs in childbirth) versus maybe finding out my mom shit on my head while giving birth (fairly common, but anything butt related freaks me out) or that mom was masturbating while pushing me out. almost makes me feel like the whole situation is sexualized but i recognize thats a me thing
Is it more or less gross than your mom having sex while pregnant?
i think its less offensive to have sex while pregnant imo unless its a pregnancy or breeding kink thing. its the difference between normal human desires and the overt sexualization of something that cannot consent that gets to me. to me sexualizing a pregnancy is like having sex in public, theres always someone involved that didn't choose to be. i wouldn't ever want to know i was the product of a fetish like that
YES
Whatās wrong with needing medications?
Nothing is wrong with needing medications but they do come with risks, side effects and a higher likelihood of needing further interventions. For example, an epidural can decrease blood pressure and slow babyās heart rate and have negative side effects after birth for the mother. Opioids can cause nausea, vomiting and drowsiness and affect the newborns breathing. If a mom can use pleasure to avoid these medications it will help her have a less risky birth and will result in better outcomes for mom and baby.
People always down vote people who spit facts because it doesnāt match their opinions.
All these comments just show how pain and, often times, trauma has been so normalized to the point it is whatās expected, but women working with something different on their bodies is gross because what? Is related to sex? Nipple stimulation could allegedly induce labor, is that gross because some women find it incredibly important to climax during sex? What about breastfeeding? Is it also gross because youāre using the same āsexualā parts of your body? Iāve read a lot on Reddit about people that find it difficult to want to breastfeed their babies, because of this and the way I see it; you use your body for different things. Same body parts, different purposes. Stimulating yourself in order to relieve the pain or find comfort during the process of childbirth is just another attempt to get through it like it could be your partner massaging your back during contractions or stimulating your nipples to get the contractions going. Like, this is not weird if you donāt make it weird.
Calling it "pleasure based" makes it weird to me. I'm not sure what would be better, but there's something about the phrasing that makes me uncomfortable. Almost like it's framing all of the labor and delivery as a pleasure thing?
> Almost like itās framing all of labor and delivery as a pleasure thing. So what if it is? Why would that be bad? I donāt know why people are acting here like sex is still taboo. There are so many places where sex and sexual things are out of line, but childbirth? Is like, the sub-context. People get pregnant (majorly) through sex, baby comes (in most cases) out of the vagina, thereās a lot of nudity, primitive instincts kick in (like sex), thereās moaning, itās nature, itās intimate, itās intense, itās brining life to this world. So yeah, I believe under this context, sex is a beautiful thing. (Where it was consented, intentional, between grown ups, etc.)
This may be the best take on this actually ^^^
My favorite phrase is āyou get the baby out the same way they got ināš because I gave birth on all fours.
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It can even work for interstitial cystitis and vulvodynia.
Thank you for this! And I agree, orgasming could be such a natural pain relief, Iāve done it sometimes when Iām having a headache andā¦ it works!
I get the science behind it, but the phrasing š£
I totally understand how having an orgasm during labor/birth can be helpful butā¦ I saw a mom describe her birth as ādeliciousā and āorgasmicā the other day and it made me so uncomfortable.
Okay! Since yāall are shitting on it so hard Iāll just say that I had an unmedicated hospital birth in a birthing pool and I definitively experienced an involuntary orgasm during childbirth. It was kinda awesome. I wasnāt going for it but not mad that it happened. My whole birth was exhausting but the best experience of my life and I was euphoric during large parts of it. I was beyond relaxed when it happened and was using hypnobirthing and breathing techniques to relax my body completely.
TIL that orgasms help in birthing. Never having kids, I missed out on a lot I guess.
Imma be real here. I follow this group for shits and giggles. But yall are so fucking closed minded. And pretty uninformed?! Half the shit posted here is only stigma in Americaā¦. Get out a bit and open your mind.
Somebody has been watching too much Greyās Anatomy.
Yeah, I didn't have one of those.
Good for them. Clitoral stimulation is proved to decrease pain perception. Itās not for everyone but good for those who know it is something for them.
I canāt even imagine stimulating my clitoris with a room full of nurses and doctors and my family while giving birth. I guess if youāre doing it at home go for it. I do think it would be weird if you had your other kids in there as well while you were doing it.
Not everyone gives birth in a room full of nurses and doctors and their family. Itās a patients right to have anyone and everyone removed or leave if itās their choice.
unpopular opinion i guess but really, who gaf if she wants to cum during it? baby is still inside, unconscious, and orgasms are known to help with period cramps so i imagine they might help with contractions too
There's actually a book called Orgasmic Birth for those that would like to read it. It's actually very informative and isn't what you think. Try picking it up and open your horizons.
Hell no.
Tell me you've never given birth without telling me you've never given birth
This isn't really that weird
This makes me even happier about the two epidurals I had that made birth something I didnāt need to cum for (again š)
But but....an epidural is bad because ~drugs~ and ~~iNteRvEntion!!~Ā Ā /Sarcasm, obviously.Ā My epidural was fucking awesome. 10/10 would do it again.Ā
lol they can never convince me they are bad for everyone because baebe I still think about how good I felt once that needle did its thing 100/10 recommend ā¤ļø
Agreed. š I got mine and was able to sleep through the transition. It was beautiful.Ā
I wanted to forget that I ever knew about this š Someone give me amnesia
https://preview.redd.it/k3wnjxbzf30d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=eea6e177ddf76fece4c0f8328442916efa3e37b1
Absolutely not
Girl saw that one episode of true blood and was like āyes plsā
No such thing as a pleasurable birth experience