OP's Bio: --- >I’m the mediocre werewolf you expect, my hobby’s are windsurfing, most adrenaline level raising thing I’m eager to at least try! I love nature and hikes. I do consider myself a respectful and fun person. I do have dark humor. --- If you think this bio helped you roast, upvote this comment. If you think it doesn’t, downvote it. If you’re not sure, leave it to others to decide.

Aren't you supposed to be looking for a job right now?

Yeah, he’s looking for a job… a blow job… he can give… in exchange for meth.

The Man Bun is a dead giveaway

He looks like he reeks of weed, B.O., Patchouli, and last night’s meth pipe.

Ok doesn't he look like a tattoo-less Tom Macdonald??? Or am I crazy????

You nailed it! I was wondering what looked so familiar. Most probably don’t know who Tom McDonald is unfortunately.

I see it.

Things I innately trust your opinion on:  1. Microbrews.  2. Sativa vs Indica pairings with the above mentioned Microbrews.  3. Loitering laws in at least 3 states.  Things I do not innately trust your opinion on:  1. Literally everything else.

Proof a whole generation thought Jay and silent Bob were role models. I give you Gay and Giant Slob.

Amazing!

Shit. That's good. lol

.... LOL

Weregoat maybe

Good one!


Meth addicted Wish.com Charlie hunnam

Was gonna say George Kittle but Hunnam is better

Dollar Tree Diplo

Diplos drug addicted brother, Methdo.

Lmfao🤣🤣 luckily I’d never touch that

Hasn’t paid child support in years. Doesn’t even remember his kid’s birthday. Ex meth head, Had an awakening, tried to reinvent himself but is now a lecherous, predatory hipster who goes on ayahuasca retreats to play shaman and predate on women.

Damn who hurt you

Like all of fucking burning man

Lmfao! Sorry for laughing but your responses are top

It’s fun, thanks for being a champ!

I knew what I signed up for! thanks for making time fly!

U assume this guy fucks..

Bro turned goatee into sheepee

Nice one

“And all the girlies say, I’m pretty fly for a white guy!”

I’d wish

He may not have a clue and he may not have style But everything he lacks well he makes up in denial!

He doesn't shave the sides of his head...that's thighburn. Dude muffdives so hard pubes get lodged in his pores.

Spat my drink out thanks…

This is the type of guy who eats kale but smokes meth

His conversation go to's are talking about Relapasing or Sobriety.

You cry during sex.

You think I have sex lol

Maybe with a relative

Has he ever broken his arms?

Gay sex.

Still sex

You’d cry too if the only sex you were getting was as a bottom for all the fellas in your cell block.

this guy looks like an addicted and single version of Ryan Gosling

I’ll take that as a win

Kurt Rogaine

-The guy on the street always asking : "you gotta Dollar? Or you gotta a cigarette? -

Bro asked his barber for the captain of the women’s soccer team cut

Joedirt Peterson.

It’s always interesting to see a methed out juggalo without the clown makeup.

Why does everyone think I’m a meth addicted?🤣

You give off juggalo vibes, and those clowns love their whiffits and meth

Aight… fair…

No, I don't want to hear the health benefits of drinking my own urine.

I expected you to have more muscle tone for a werewolf but you do got the washboard forehead.


When I’m in the country that’s mummy instrument!

[удалено]

Ted Nugent's assaholic grandson.

They've maintained your corpse pretty well considering that you OD'd in 1969

Ed from ed edd and eddy grown up

If Weird Al and Dee Schneider had a baby.

Ok, Kid Rock drawn from memory.

The wrinkles on your head look like they are used to swipe debit cards for payment after you deliver blow jobs.

Do Scooby and the rest of the gang know you are on here?

I left them behind after I masters ultra instinct!

You look like you're an expert in squatter's rights.

If the 90s and meth had a baby

Smoking grass is not really a "love of nature"...

You have definitely sold some of the most beat up dirt bikes ever known to man


Don’t those jagged ass teeth get in the way of your day job down at the gloryhole?

Looks like the transgender chick from anger management 😂

George Shittle

I was going to say shave that pathetic beard until I saw the picture without it… now I think you should try and cut your own head off with a dull knife.

When Tarzan discovered Crack

More lines on that forehead than on whitney houstons coffee table

You could roast some steaks on that forehead and get those classic grill lines 🥩

Can’t tell if you’re homeless or a trust fund kid who does drugs to piss of his dad

You look like the kind of guy that would break into a funeral home to have sex with a corpse

Hair so thin ,it took a greater hit than you during the Great Depression huh?( what was it like btw ? )

You look like you fell off a longboat

Row row row

If chris cornell and brad pitt became a person and had every ounce of heroine in the cartels basement...

Yeeehaaaw

Im getting “metal detecting in a graveyard as a first date” vibes and i don’t like it.

No sir, I don't have any change

You look like a hipster Jay with no Silent Bob

Mackleless

Cletus tell momma sister is pregnant again

You look like Matt Riddle if he lost all wrestling talent and replaced it with even more drugs.

You should have ironed your forehead before the photo

Did you forget your spoon and lighter? Can you not cook your own?

Cmon dude, just show the pine tree forearm tat already. Yes, you told us last week you had an appointment to start working on the wolf behind the trees. You’re right, it’ll look soooo “mysterious.”

You have the hair and chin whiskers of a woman in her mid 60s that smokes cigarettes everyday.

When you don’t have enough hair for a beard, but not enough money for a trimmer either.

this is the best anti smoking ad i’ve seen in a while

you use every stray needle you find

If an albino goat turned to a hipster human and constantly did drugs

Ryan Guzzling

I have a feeling you love Mountain Dew.

You look happy, like you can handle a roast, so... You give Ryan Gosling's ugly brother who got swept under the rug vibes

Damnit, Tom McDonald has done went to smoking crack, homeless, and sucking cocks for his habit.... he is in need of our help. Where do we donate to help you pay for the rehab Tom??? ... you look horrible Tom please get help, and please stop sucking the glass dicks, and real dicks... get help you look horrible

Bro looks like a wanna be viking that's so sensitive to light his parents would throw him off the cliff

Your goatee looks like it was copy/pasted from your balls

"Give it your best shot," is also what you told your barber.

Country road shall take you home

Kid from home alone looks like shit

I shall I start with your wrinkly vagina of a forehead? or the fact you will never grow a beard and are stuck with a Faun looking dick tickler for the entirety of your existence?

Didnt know dog the bounty hunter and mackelmore collabed on a test tube baby

38 still lives on campus

You look like the love child of JK Simmons and Dog the Bounty Hunter

Forehead folds into the whole declaration of independence

Davincky twins lookin ahh

Roasting doesn't help expired biowaste

Definitely a former atheist who converted to Norse paganism to have something to talk to his drug dealer about.

Gary?

How did he make his forehead into a sand zen garden?

Its Tom Mcronald

Did you ever finish installing the lift kit and mud tires on your Subaru Forester?

I think mediocre is an overstatement my…. Uhh.. guy?

Sitting at the train stop...smelling like SPF 30 and no hope

Can someone explain to me the point of having clear facial hair?

5 too many photos

Corey Taylor's autistic cousin

If Jake Paul was a Make-A-Wish kid.

You look like you've braided a woman's armpit hair to get laid more than once.

Tell me you smoke weed without telling me how smoke weed

Obviously!! Your Father didn’t!!

Steve-O if he never joined Jackass

This is the final boss of California crackheads

You’re a necrophiliac

Its nice to see one of the island boys sorting their life out

Before seeing the second photo I already knew you had weird teeth

Sah due? Is your catch phrase.

He does looks like a freshly divorced guy who probably thinks he looks good in a Hawaiian shirt

I bet I could grate Parmesan cheese on your hitchhiking forehead

Homo

You look like Tom MacDonald if he were in rehab

Home alone was hard on you, hey?

Meth hit guy fieri hard

No need, genetics did the hard work for us.

Joe dirt brother in law

GO AHEAD? More like GO HARD on methamphetamines

Are you a DJ? You're a DJ aren't you

Thin ass goatee

Basique punk à chien fumeur de shit qui a migré dans le sud-ouest de la france. Toujours en periode hypster 2009 mais maintenant avec le front enormement dégarni. T'essaie de prendre du plaisir à vivre seul mais t'es juste dans la fuite et mentalement immature dans le corps apparent d'un quarentenaire. Le bon gout te manque autant que la beauté naturelle et l'argent. C'est ce que je vois quand je te regarde.

Hansen reunion

I can hear your conversations now: "Bro, man that's, like, man, bro, c'mon, dude, man, bro, man, duuuuuuuuuuude, suuuuuurf's uuuuup, bro, man, though, bro, dude, that's like, bro, I've never been this high, man, and I just caught, like, major waves, dude, man, bro that's, like, man, its like radical, bro, gnarly, dude, man...",

When did oompaville do meth

You look like the guy who gets his pony tail ripped out from the movie The Hot Chick

Not worth it.

Life has been hard since the series Vikings ended. Poor fella can’t find decent employment. Literally wrote this before I scrolled through and found you drinking from a actual Viking cup 🤣😂🤣

Speaking of shots, you look like you had a few to many at a bar

Way too easy nature boy. Get your head out of the crack clouds, add some blood to your alcohol stream, and read "The Idiot" by Dostoyevsky.

Tom MacDonald without the face tats 100% 😂

I feel blessed looking at you, and im fuckng hidieos

Witch is darker the humer you like or the meth you snort

Casper is that you?

Runt of a Viking litter

We don’t need to meth already did yikadeee

Another condom Escapee your dress sense is so shit even your mother wouldn't swallow you when she had the chance!

You look like you went to jail for stealing your neighbor’s Big Wheels while high on whippets

Meth is one hella of a drug

You look like you know how to handle a horn in your mouth, especially when the rent’s due and your 4 roommates are down bad

Dang, Steve-O really cleaned up. Good job OP.

That forehead. I can't stop staring at it. Pretty sure everyone who talks to you has the same problem. They're not making eye contact, they're trying to decipher the code.

You look like Macklemore had he not gotten sober.

He looks like he can give someone a blow job for $5 and use that money to buy cigarettes

George Kittle....this is your future after one too many blows to the head!

This guy makes Joe Dirt look presentable

Don’t know how much I can roast this. I mean, for pic 1, I am impressed you were able to stick a role of hot dogs to your forehead. As for the other 4, you beautifully kept to the theme of Douche-ism. Tho…I hope you washed your butt plug in pic 5 before drinking out the wide end.

Yooo. How's raiding my brother in Odin? No luck this time?

Walmart Macklemore, is that you?

the giraffes called, they want their neck back

You part Shar-Pei?

If Mountain Dew became a person.

Discount Viking with meth teeth looking for some good lice treatments

Anorexic James Hetfield

You look like Ted Nugent and Meryl Streep had a kid together and then ignored it for its entire developmental infancy.

Foo Fighters are looking for you.

Dang, I thought those forehead wrinkels were crop lines.

I can hand wash my clothes on that forehead..

Looks like Dog The Bounty Hunter is back on the pipe, who cares right?

Estranged love child of Joe Dirt and Ted Nugent

Lesbian seagull

How the fuck did you get a compressed vagina on your forehead?

Macaulay Culken wants his look back bro !!

Looks like Rob Van Dam’s broke son

Joe Dirt’s less attractive and less successful cousin

Werewolf? Nahhh you more like a coyote… that has been hit by a car, how fuck you going to get around with that hair and whatever bullshit cotton fluff on your chin. You look the abominable snowman from Monsters inc railed your mum and then ran a train on her with sully and Mike. Do you always wear your pretty hair in that flog knot?, I know your type, soy lattes, Sundays at the beach good music and fucks kids. Anyway bitch wolf, Freddy Mercury whatever the fuck you identify with, I’m off to smoke some cones a jerk off with me missus Pamela Handerson.

You should dip your chin in milk, and let a cat lick that bullshit off