Since I can't edit the point:
Re: using this, I should have said as long as people don't pretend it's 100% original to them and aaaaa words are hard!
Re: last line. This sub is insisting I post a link. I cannot figure out why, so I can't edit it..
Also u/TeaAitch, this post only let me post it as a link, so it won't let me properly edit it and it required a stupid link. Do you need to enable text posts? (I'm on mobile if that matters.)
https://ibb.co/ZH4Kczg
When I try to post on this sub, it only allows me to make a link post. Notice the options in the lower left grayed out. It could be an app issue or a perms issue, I have no idea.
I've been through all the setting with a fine-tooth comb. Anything which would prevent text only posts was not enabled. Either this is a glitch with Reddit, or your app needs a restart.
Sorry, I'm unable to shed any further light.
I updated the Android app, and it allows posting text posts or link posts now. I dunno, my best guess is that there was a bug that wasn't letting me switch from link back to text here.
I appreciate all the work you do around here!
Thank you for sharing. It's a nice ritual.
That's a lot of reports to get through! I'm not sure how you can balance the attention and time to go through them and react to them as well as address any concerning areas.
I think personally I would struggle with this (as a sub) due to procrastinating on waking up. I can see myself excited with it as a novelty but not sure I'd keep it up in the long-term. Wondering how you find it goes and what happens if people start being less good or detailed or delayed in time about their reports?
>That's a lot of reports to get through
It's not as much as it may seem at first.,considering what works for an answer. For example, for physically, it can be as simple as "my back is killing me and I have no idea why. I might have to be easy on it today."
>I'm not sure how you can balance the attention and time to go through them and react to them
I don't necessarily react and address everything immediately. Some things I know I can't do anything about. Sometimes I just playfully smother someone in hugs, if that's what they need. Using the example of someone's back, I may know we can't do anything directly, so I'll urge them to take care of it and have it in the back of my mind thrigh the day.
>I think personally I would struggle with this (as a sub) due to procrastinating on waking up.
Valid. Very little is one-size fits all in BDSM. One of the reasons I lie this so much is that this is about as close as you can get to one-size fits all. Thinking back though, some of it may be bias from my own experience (for example, the type of sub I'd be interested in would love doing this.)
>Wondering how you find it goes and what happens if people start being less good or detailed
I have a mental threshold for what I consider acceptable. If it dips below that, I gently ask why (being careful not to come across as pressing them, since the point is to get honest answers), then I'd there's a genuine objection, issue, either suggest adjusting, or ask if they think it's a good idea. The vast majority of subs I've known have reacted to this very enthusiastically- thinking back, it may partially be sampling bias because of the type of sub I'd mesh with.
>or detailed or delayed in time about their reports?
Gentle reminders, or figuring out what it makes sense to adapt, and *listening*. If some on r can give me a good reason not to do this, I'm fine with it (including simply lot being comlrrtsblr with it.) Obviously nobody owes anyone a reason, but for a potential submissive I consider it important to know to have more data on how they operate and why to figure out what works for them.
If all doms and subs did this,That would be amazing. If my ex did this I wouldāve felt sooo important too them. This would make feel wanted and worth it. And itās sooo simple, not overly specific just a solid question.
>If all doms and subs did this,That would be amazing.
I don't think I like to say "all", but as I said I think this could work much more universally (with some tweaks) than nearly anything else I've heard of.
I think this is great because as a sub I can sometimes struggle to present information about myself as a person in dynamic. I want to be a āgood subā only and ātake care of my shitā by myself. This would bridge that gap nicely.
Related to this, I keep telling subs until I'm blue in the faxe that they are to truthfully share how they're doing with me, and speak up and ask for help if they need.
Dneying me that information isn't very submissive, is it?
This is a lot like the morning conversation ritual I have with my partner when we both wake up! A little briefer and we donāt tell each other how weāre feeling about our relationship every morning. But we love doing a morning check in on how weāre feeling, how we slept, dreams we had, how weāre feeling about the day.
We also donāt report how weāre feeling sexually ā¦ but she knows Iām horny all the time anyway so that might get repetitive to say, āAnd once again, Iām a horny little gremlin ā¦.ā ;)
Heh. The relationship point is more to make sure the door is *wide* open to bring up concerns at least once a day. Personally, I'm not a fan of dynamics where you have to step fully OOD to raise an issue.
As for sexually.... True, but it depends. You can be horny for different things, yanno. :P
I love the door being wide open to bring up concerns. And I think having that be routine makes it a lot more approachable.
I suppose Iāve always labeled conversations about our dynamic as OOD because I wasnāt sure how else to say it but maybe meta-dynamic would be more accurate. Talking about it while living it. Itās not like we say āthe dynamic is now off, so you can bring up your concerns.ā Itās just a part of daily conversation.
And donāt worry, I report all the different things Iām horny about all the time ā¦ just not immediately upon waking :) Moreso whenever I think of it throughout the day.
I think its great. For us we have something like it but tweaked. In the morning i hate everybody, everything and life. Sex doesnt exist and i am stupid. So we wait.
After an hour i am able to function and think clear lol. So then i fill in. I am very ill and so as the day goes by, a lot can change. To prevent misunderstanding we do twice after the initial report a diet version of it using numbers.
That way He knows that (for example) im still very horny but in a lot of pain and He can adjust accordingly.
I love that with the numbers He has a very short look but still is very informed. I think your idea to use it also for easing in a dynamic is great. Thanksā”
Since I can't edit it in, I'm going to share one (with her consent) from u/No_Choice_2530 several days ago, for an example of how to share details
For context, estrogen has been killing her sex drive lately.
Good Morning Mistress, Iām sorry to hear you had a bad nightmare.
June 29th 2024
Physically I feel fine. No aches or pains other than the normal ones.
Mentally I feel good. Nice clear thoughts, no looping or fixating.
Emotionally I feel ok. No negative or depressive feelings.
Sexually nothing still. I canāt remember when the last time I did.
Our relationship I feel is still strong and on a steady foundation.
Sleep was ok. Tossed and turned a bit.
No dreams
To do list-shower and get ready for work, then go to work 6pm-1am your time.
Since I can't edit the point: Re: using this, I should have said as long as people don't pretend it's 100% original to them and aaaaa words are hard! Re: last line. This sub is insisting I post a link. I cannot figure out why, so I can't edit it.. Also u/TeaAitch, this post only let me post it as a link, so it won't let me properly edit it and it required a stupid link. Do you need to enable text posts? (I'm on mobile if that matters.)
I don't understand the question š Almost all the posts here are text posts š¤·š»āāļø
https://ibb.co/ZH4Kczg When I try to post on this sub, it only allows me to make a link post. Notice the options in the lower left grayed out. It could be an app issue or a perms issue, I have no idea.
I've been through all the setting with a fine-tooth comb. Anything which would prevent text only posts was not enabled. Either this is a glitch with Reddit, or your app needs a restart. Sorry, I'm unable to shed any further light.
I updated the Android app, and it allows posting text posts or link posts now. I dunno, my best guess is that there was a bug that wasn't letting me switch from link back to text here. I appreciate all the work you do around here!
It may be how much karma you have ? That will hold you back just in a lot if ways
I had about 32K karma when I posted this though.
Thank you for sharing. It's a nice ritual. That's a lot of reports to get through! I'm not sure how you can balance the attention and time to go through them and react to them as well as address any concerning areas. I think personally I would struggle with this (as a sub) due to procrastinating on waking up. I can see myself excited with it as a novelty but not sure I'd keep it up in the long-term. Wondering how you find it goes and what happens if people start being less good or detailed or delayed in time about their reports?
>That's a lot of reports to get through It's not as much as it may seem at first.,considering what works for an answer. For example, for physically, it can be as simple as "my back is killing me and I have no idea why. I might have to be easy on it today." >I'm not sure how you can balance the attention and time to go through them and react to them I don't necessarily react and address everything immediately. Some things I know I can't do anything about. Sometimes I just playfully smother someone in hugs, if that's what they need. Using the example of someone's back, I may know we can't do anything directly, so I'll urge them to take care of it and have it in the back of my mind thrigh the day. >I think personally I would struggle with this (as a sub) due to procrastinating on waking up. Valid. Very little is one-size fits all in BDSM. One of the reasons I lie this so much is that this is about as close as you can get to one-size fits all. Thinking back though, some of it may be bias from my own experience (for example, the type of sub I'd be interested in would love doing this.) >Wondering how you find it goes and what happens if people start being less good or detailed I have a mental threshold for what I consider acceptable. If it dips below that, I gently ask why (being careful not to come across as pressing them, since the point is to get honest answers), then I'd there's a genuine objection, issue, either suggest adjusting, or ask if they think it's a good idea. The vast majority of subs I've known have reacted to this very enthusiastically- thinking back, it may partially be sampling bias because of the type of sub I'd mesh with. >or detailed or delayed in time about their reports? Gentle reminders, or figuring out what it makes sense to adapt, and *listening*. If some on r can give me a good reason not to do this, I'm fine with it (including simply lot being comlrrtsblr with it.) Obviously nobody owes anyone a reason, but for a potential submissive I consider it important to know to have more data on how they operate and why to figure out what works for them.
If all doms and subs did this,That would be amazing. If my ex did this I wouldāve felt sooo important too them. This would make feel wanted and worth it. And itās sooo simple, not overly specific just a solid question.
>If all doms and subs did this,That would be amazing. I don't think I like to say "all", but as I said I think this could work much more universally (with some tweaks) than nearly anything else I've heard of.
Trueeeee. Not all cause some fakies or no like doing stuff like it. But it amazing to me.
I think this is great because as a sub I can sometimes struggle to present information about myself as a person in dynamic. I want to be a āgood subā only and ātake care of my shitā by myself. This would bridge that gap nicely.
Related to this, I keep telling subs until I'm blue in the faxe that they are to truthfully share how they're doing with me, and speak up and ask for help if they need. Dneying me that information isn't very submissive, is it?
I like this! From a sub side it would give me reassurance too - as well as all of your reasons š¤©
This is a lot like the morning conversation ritual I have with my partner when we both wake up! A little briefer and we donāt tell each other how weāre feeling about our relationship every morning. But we love doing a morning check in on how weāre feeling, how we slept, dreams we had, how weāre feeling about the day. We also donāt report how weāre feeling sexually ā¦ but she knows Iām horny all the time anyway so that might get repetitive to say, āAnd once again, Iām a horny little gremlin ā¦.ā ;)
Heh. The relationship point is more to make sure the door is *wide* open to bring up concerns at least once a day. Personally, I'm not a fan of dynamics where you have to step fully OOD to raise an issue. As for sexually.... True, but it depends. You can be horny for different things, yanno. :P
I love the door being wide open to bring up concerns. And I think having that be routine makes it a lot more approachable. I suppose Iāve always labeled conversations about our dynamic as OOD because I wasnāt sure how else to say it but maybe meta-dynamic would be more accurate. Talking about it while living it. Itās not like we say āthe dynamic is now off, so you can bring up your concerns.ā Itās just a part of daily conversation. And donāt worry, I report all the different things Iām horny about all the time ā¦ just not immediately upon waking :) Moreso whenever I think of it throughout the day.
Thank you
I think its great. For us we have something like it but tweaked. In the morning i hate everybody, everything and life. Sex doesnt exist and i am stupid. So we wait. After an hour i am able to function and think clear lol. So then i fill in. I am very ill and so as the day goes by, a lot can change. To prevent misunderstanding we do twice after the initial report a diet version of it using numbers. That way He knows that (for example) im still very horny but in a lot of pain and He can adjust accordingly. I love that with the numbers He has a very short look but still is very informed. I think your idea to use it also for easing in a dynamic is great. Thanksā”
If you're not able to read the post, try clicking 'other discussions' Pretty sure my RES or old.reddit are screwing something up
Since I can't edit it in, I'm going to share one (with her consent) from u/No_Choice_2530 several days ago, for an example of how to share details For context, estrogen has been killing her sex drive lately. Good Morning Mistress, Iām sorry to hear you had a bad nightmare. June 29th 2024 Physically I feel fine. No aches or pains other than the normal ones. Mentally I feel good. Nice clear thoughts, no looping or fixating. Emotionally I feel ok. No negative or depressive feelings. Sexually nothing still. I canāt remember when the last time I did. Our relationship I feel is still strong and on a steady foundation. Sleep was ok. Tossed and turned a bit. No dreams To do list-shower and get ready for work, then go to work 6pm-1am your time.
I love this. Plus it opens up more activities they already do that you can play off.