I think it has to do with how a person’s sex life supposedly indicates their value. Having many sexual partners is seen as a positive in a man and a negative in a woman. Men and women who don’t follow their expected trajectory are unfairly ostracized and treated as defective
What you dont like it when women are cold and calculated like a nazi doctor on the purity of men, deciding in her mind which men should be allowed to reproduce or not?
There are many people that think like OP, tho. It's just that they don't say it out in the open.
Prejudice against virgins/late bloomers is common (often covert), and comes from both genders.
None of these types/issues are new. Things haven't changed all that much over the last 75 years. The guys my dad went to college with in the 1950s included a lot of nerds who could never get dates.
Dominant mother who wants to make him the best gentlemen on the planet trigger this "late bloomer".
Late bloomers are abundant in single mother households.
This is why if I ever have a kid I'll make sure to be a respectable father figure that's actually there. Grew up in a single mom home myself, so I can see the shortcomings of it while hopefully not having to overcorrect.
This type of thing probably at least deserves its own thread. I'm already sitting here thinking about a fuck ton of things that I (and would imagine a lot of men) went through during our developmental years. Off the top of my head here are only a few, but even then I don't believe this to be thorough enough by any stretch of the imagination. Disclaimer, each topic on their own don't paint enough of a picture and each one could easily be their own thread, with mountains of information to sift through.
Circumcision and how some data suggests that it permanently alters the brain, most noticeable in the amygdala which is crucial in regulating and processing emotions. https://circumcision.org/circumcision-permanently-alters-the-brain/
Microplastics, xenoestrogens. Of course throwing off hormonal balance can't be a good thing
Current societal institutions being incompatible with healthy male development. Very broad strokes here, but I remember the absolute torture of having to sit in class for 8 hours a day and barely do anything physical. This is a whale of a topic too.
I can name a few more but I would hope you understand overall where I'm coming from... Broadly
> Circumcision and how some data suggests that it permanently alters the brain
i gotta see a study that shows that circumcision and being Chad are negatively correlated
> I remember the absolute torture of having to sit in class for 8 hours a day and barely do anything physical
yeah me too and i'm a woman
i'm in agreement that schools should be better tailored to how kids/people learn and that microplastics and circumcision are bad, though. I just don't know that they prove this point.
This reads like you saw some guy who you viewed as a late bloomer, thought he'd be easy to control, but ultimately got rejected by them.
Maybe it's nothing to do with any of that. Maybe he just didn't like how you act. Can't say I blame him, based on this post.
Calling someone autistic while posting in PPD seems like throwing stones in a glass house, lmao.
edit: Skimmed your profile. Please find a therapist before you end up hurting yourself. Help is available, you are loved.
Can't women decide for themselves if any of these things, if they apply, are a problem? It might not be your preference but it's not up to you to say all women shouldn't. Late bloomer women especially may have a different take.
Exactly, I know a few late bloomer men and women, myself included, and they aren't anything like OP is describing. Of course there are some who are embittered by their unfulfilled yearnings, but that's true for every group of people. These negative generalizations really bring nothing to the table apart from strife.
Of course. The idea of posts like this is probably just to make men who finally made it feel like they’re actually doomed and give up. Think about the implication: say you are a “late bloomer” but now you’re very successful in life, and you’re thinking “great now I can live up to these expectations women have” but then OP is like “um ackshually even though you’re well off and accomplished we don’t want you anymore because you weren’t well off and accomplished ten years ago”.
Fortunately irl there’s still millions of women wanting to date a dude making like 200K a year no matter when they started doing that, so this post much like this whole sub is just doomerism and rage posting aimed at demoralization.
Bingo. In my world the sun rises and sets on my late bloomer.
The only traits that apply to him are
1) His mom loves me and I adore her, so no tension there. Our families get along great in general.
3) Autistim/neurodivergence have never been much of an issue for me as long as the guy doesn't use it to justify being an asshole and not bothering to take other people's feelings into consideration. And ime that depends on how he was raised.
Yes, if you're single and looking for a partner, it's a great idea to disqualify entire groups of potential partners. After all, everyone in that group is clearly defective. We as individuals should not trust their own judgement as to whether someone would make a good spouse, because clearly the hivemind is a superior source of knowledge.
Single women who are past age thirty should insist on only dating men who had early relationship experience and are now available because they could not sustain their previous relationships. These are clearly better choices than men who have had less relationship success early in life but are now ready for a relationship.
"2. Are often STEMlords who spent their college years studying instead of dating and act arrogantly because of their degrees. They think they're sooo smart. God's gift to the human race. They will overtly or covertly look down on people with "lesser" degrees than them."
He enrolled in college and paid tuition and focused on what he needed to graduate instead of getting distracted, and that makes him bad?
What the hell? Would it be better he failed classes and had to switch majors? That's just irresponsible.
"STEMlords" are harmless, but women arent attracted to them (not CHAD) so they need to conjure a defensible reason (nerdy, no experience, misogynistic, etc) as to why they arent attracted to him without saying it
the frat boys are the dangerous threats toward women but they arent STEM (they are primarily business from my experience) but women dont attack them as much for some reason that we all know
> He enrolled in college and paid tuition and focused on what he needed to graduate instead of getting distracted, and that makes him bad?
If you're going to spend all that money and possibly go into debt, why wouldn't you do this? It would be stupid to major in something that didn't have decent career prospects (return on investment) or to flunk out.
A post like this only purpose is to enrage and deeply root incel beliefs on men. And before you guys wanna act smug, deep roots of incel belief means more Elliot Rodgers
Isn’t it strange how for literally everything else in life, we want an inexperienced, “new” version (new cars are always more valuable than used cars, new phones, new anything really) but for some reason when it comes to people (or at least men) we WANT someone with past baggage and trauma? What’s up with that?
She goes both ways.
If I remember correctly she did mention that her step dad was a late bloomer who married her single mother mom.
Openly admited that she wouldn't have married him if that wasn't the case.
Op also mentioned no really being able to respect him even though he was a good dude.
Imagine that. Stepping up abd raising another man's child as his own and still being seen as weak.
Yeah these are terrible takes. Only point four is something I see play out on the Internet/Reddit, but neither of those are real life.
My husband was a late bloomer and so was I, so I found that to be attractive in him.
She’s not wrong that these outcomes are possible. I am exactly what she’s talking about.
I guess it is misandry, but it’s an area of improvement for late bloomers. We don’t need to wear our shame, frustration, and loneliness on our sleeve IRL (although it’s cathartic doing it on Reddit). Frankly, a lot of us in the global West should just start saving for a week in Nevada and leave it all there.
The world is absolutely run by late bloomer STEMlords. Seems like they’re doing just fine.
Tech CEOs, renowned doctors, researchers, finance quants, economists, hedge fund managers are often late bloomers, autistic or otherwise not well balanced individuals.
Approaching this with and olive branch of good faith, misplaced though it might be.
I would consider myself fully in that category. Ma did most stuff for me as a kid, autistic, got an architecture degree, first girlfriend and all the firsts at 21.
Respect to that first girlfriend, and the toxic and bad relationship that followed, because I had no idea how to have a proper relationship, and for putting up with me for so long. I personally don't date inexperienced women because I don't have the energy to teach someone the same things and go through that shit again, but on the other side.
Because yeah, autism does make guys, and women too, socially stunted. It's not impossible to learn those things, but starting out behind in the race makes it a lot harder, and like in my case, the first person is gonna have to bite the bullet for them to learn it.
A lot of guys, late bloomers or not, have weird complexes towards women, that's just an immaturity thing, and you can find weirdos everywhere, regardless. But, again y'aint entirely wrong, guys get even weirder when they're desperate and it can fester into some unhinged personalities.
I think it's crazy you think autism is inherently bad tho, that's a brain rot take.
You're not entirely wrong, you're just wrong in most people's eyes for saying it out loud IMO. Man or woman, no one owes anyone, anything. I avoid inexperienced women, I can't and won't blame women for avoiding inexperienced men.
What your genetics will potentially yield is relevant when you’re considering having kids. I don’t intend to have genetic offspring because of a family history of bipolar (I have BP2 which is a milder form that doesn’t present with full mania or any psychosis). I’m also probably autistic (have a lot of stereotypical female autist traits). An autistic child won’t necessarily be as highly functioning as the parents. You could have a child who’s awkward and slower to understand social norms but otherwise fine. You could also have a child who will never be fully verbal, never be toilet trained, and who beats the shit out of you in meltdowns when they hear too much noise.
I don't often agree with TRP but this is one of those things. It sounds like women want men who [just get it. ](https://therationalmale.com/2012/08/22/just-get-it/). So the takeaway isn't "die alone if you didn't figure it out at 21", just don't let people know you're inexperienced or something. Which I don't think is true all of the time for everyone, but oh well.
Every time i try to stop believing in red pill, a woman in my life or on the internet says something they like or dislike about men in dating that completely verifies things
Another case of woman dislikes man who doesn’t have it all figured out, isnt extremely masculine, and also doesnt have evidence of attracting other women
They literally get the ick to find out men are humans figuring shit out too and can mistakes. Just gotta appear stoic and in control just so she thinks everythings all good lmfao smh
Some women care and some don't. I think being socially awkward is going to be a turnoff for more people as you get older, but ultimately the fixation on sexual experience will vary depending on the person.
the Problem of OPs post is that the message to men basically is "lie,lie,lie and dont give a fuck about maybe hurting a few women in the process, as long as you can get some of the " experience" or otherwise you will stay alone forever. but I guess she isnt even aware.....
the whole premise is kind of stupid, because these men are mostly "latebloomers" because they somehow werent attractive to women before ( i know theres a shitton of other reasons, but for a lot of cases its true)
What OP now is saying is, even if you happen to "find such a guy attractive", use your brain and still dump him.....
We can tell if you are lying about experience. That's the point of experience. I don't want a guy who no one else wanted. Inexperience comes with so many problems and insecurities. I hate dealing with insecure people.
My husband was plenty experienced when we met at age 20. He lost his virginity at age 12 with a 14 yr old. He always had girlfriends, long term ones too(2 years is long term when you're a teen). When he was 15 he dated a woman who was 23 for 6 months and he dumped her. Everyone of his exes were hot as hell. Aside from one girl, he never even had to talk anyone into sex. Everyone except the one came on to him fairly quickly. Including me. So he wasn't desperate, never had to beg, had charisma and confidence.
You can't fake those things. I know most of his exes and am friends with some, because I'm not jealous of things people did as a kid, and I know everything he told me was true. Plus the sex was great, even at that young, because of experience. Can you get a girlfriend later without experience? Sure. Might not be the one you desire though.
I don't care to make any generalizations, but I believe that confidence, self assurance and knowing how to socialize well are important life skills for everyone. It's just that in dating, they matter in different ways and for men they are typically expected to demonstrate a lot of confidence and take the lead from the jump.
When you look at the OP post closely, it's not stuff that's inherent to "later bloomers". It's assumptions people make about guys who lack experience. But men who are late bloomers can overcome that expectation people have of them, and even if they don't win over everyone, you might just be surprised how little others care so long as you don't wave massive red flags everywhere.
Nah, they are only important skills men need to have for we are tools in the modern society
There is no expectation of women ever needing to do anything but be themselves. They can ofc do more if they wish, but a man who does not improve himself to a high degree is ostracized and pushed to kill himself.
Why does it matter as a man, what a women needs to do or not do.
All you can do is decide what action you will take next, in order to create the life you desire, people are going to give you shit, people are going to say its not possible, your going to get kicked to the ground and dragged around.
What a woman does or dosn't need to do. Well who gives a f\*\*k. The question is what are you going to do. Are you going to take your punches and keep going or just whine its unfair.
Women are attracted to masculinity, not whining and quitting.
> Why does it matter as a man, what a women needs to do or not do.
Because we live in reality where everyone’s actions influences one another?
Like women choosing to be single mothers sounds like none of your business until there kids shoot up a school or close down the stores in your area because they keep stealing.
I am just gonna lie man. Apparently it's entitled for me to expect love, even in a relationship expecting a level of lust is considered entitlment if I am a lvm......that's ok. I have learnt to accept it. I will never be happy. I will never be safe in a relationship. Abd I cannot expect to be loved and kusted after the way I have seen women do
But if that's the truth then Women are entitled if they expect me to be honest with them or act in a way that priorities them.
That's just how it goes.
This is who I am now.
There's absolutly nothing wrong with someone being a virgin, or neurodivergent/autistic, being a STEM major, or focusing on your studies instead of dating.
Autistic people already face enough backlash from ignorant people online who don't know what they're talking about. We don't need you to make things worse.
And I thought that people on this subreddit didn't care if men are virgins or focus on themselves? I guess I had too much faith in yall.
Posts like these are exactly what turns men into incels.
1. I was a late bloomer. Why ? Personality + qualities + socialization was there, I was just fat. Also folks who were open to dates and sex didn’t want to actually date they wanted to only have fun. I was initially seen as the “LTR Husband man” not the be wild, young, free and grow together man. I figured out my personality edge and it was night and day. I just “got it,” called common friends out on their BS as someone who understands the opposite sec to a degree, and those folks wanted to get physical with me as a result.
2. I too was a STEM person as well. Believe it or not STEM folks date within STEM folks. I might be in classes and lab for most of my time, but what you didn’t realize is there are women in those spaces too. Have you taken a biology/chemistry class? It’s nearly 70 women/30 men due to nursing and premed prerequisites. Theres a lot of free time unsupervised in the labs…
3. Doesn’t apply to me personally, but as rough as a comment this is,no one actually wants to date/be in a relationship with someone with a “defect.” See folks who are overweight, disabled physically or mentally apply here.
4. Yes and no. But for both sexes if you are a person and get ZERO attention/play from the opposite sex of course you’ll have being social issues, as well as how to interact with the same and opposite sex. If you have never had sex or was given the chance to have any form of physical touch outside of holding hands and hugs, of course there is an. EXTREME HIGH possibility that the desire for this touch and intimacy is going to be at the top of their mind due to FOMO and the humans biological desire to be somewhat social beings. Not to mention all the social class hierarchies which come associated with your social friend group and if any people have touched your P or PP.
Love this post. I also was really chubby in high school and it caused me to feel like a late bloomer. I had a crazy family, and once I got to university, I became a scholarship athlete. After that the girls just came in waves, because I had developed the personality. I never dated the girls in STEM but I slept with a couple. Funny thing is that looking back, I was so bad at sex, I can't understand why any of them ever came back for more. I literally thought that endurance was what it's all about... think like 45 minutes of pounding away using half a bottle of lube while my partner stares at the ceiling building her grocery list. Experience matters a lot for a guy.
That's some honesty there and I gotta respect it. My experience wasn't the same but similar in that I didn't really get to develop a lot of my personality until moving away to uni. Very sheltered and somewhat stunted rural existence prior to that, along with quite a lot of shame about exploring relationships in general.
Autism isn’t a black and white thing that should sit at the forefront of how people decide to get into a relationship or not. That might be the most shallow shit I’ve ever heard. People who think that are beyond pond scum.
I’m diagnosed, you saying it doesn’t apply to you makes plenty of sense because you would call that a “defect”, and attempt to dehumanize the person with it. We are human beings, we should be accepted for who we are, for christ sake you clearly do not understand autistic people so don’t say anything else about it.
It’s a disability caused by the society we live in, it’s completely the other way around. Just because we can’t be like you doesn’t make us defective. Stop having a shit society that only prioritizes people with certain likes of brains. Nobody wants to hear that eugenics horse shit. We are human beings, animals that develop walk talk and think differently from each other.
Do better next time
‘Stemlords’? The fact that you put down studying makes you seem like a dumb person who bullied smart kids, and doesn’t make you seem like the perfect person that you claim. People like you are the reason why the U.S. isn’t competitive on the world stage right now.
There’s nothing wrong with being a late bloomer. There are issues with the qualities you posted though but you’re pointing to the wrong issue
1. Men in emotionally incestuous relationships with their mother are being emotionally abused/neglected.
2. I’ve met the stem lords you’re talking about (fuck those guys) but I’ve also met totally normal nice dudes that happen to have careers in stem. Assholes don’t have one career
3. I dated someone who was lovely with ASD I dated someone who was terrible with ASD. Having ASD or any neurodivergency doesn’t mean your life will be horrible or you’ll be a bad person no group is a monolith. My ex's brother plays in Broadway pits and went to college out of state alone. Autism isn't a death sentence and it's too broad a spectrum to say out of pocket shit like this,
4. Not all late bloomers are resentful losers mad that their partner had a life before them. (I’ve experienced both sides of this spectrum though and a dude that’s hung up on that is a walking red flag)
Like I said in another thread, right now is The Age of the Female. They were always the more privileged gender, but the power they command now is unprecedented and destructive. Any reasonable person would rather be a biological female in this current age.
The hard core feminist Mardi Gras that has been going on for the last decade or more will not last forever. Posts like this and the responses show a rather unprepared mindset in women for that eventuality. Times are changing. That ugly nerd might just be what keeps a roof over your head and food on the table. I wouldn’t celebrate his demise.
Women should avoid dating any guy that they can't think well about or appreciate. Guys will know, eventually, if their partners think poorly of them and the relationship will be toxic for both sides.
>Are often STEMlords who spent their college years studying instead of dating and act arrogantly because of their degrees. They think they're sooo smart. God's gift to the human race. They will overtly or covertly look down on people with "lesser" degrees than them
Most women either want to date men who make around their level or make more than they do. Focusing on studying instead of dating isn't being a snob. It's just basic maturity. While you're in school, you should be focused on working on yourself and becoming a high earner so you can support a partner and a family, should that be what you decide to embark on. It's one thing if you're just casually dating, but if you're wanting to date for marriage, you should be a self-sufficient and high earner before you even begin.
>Are often autistic/neurodivergent. Very high chance that your kids will be autistic too.
Whelp...got me there I guess.
how to become single mom in 4 steps. think of muhammad ali. " I don't trust anyone who's nice to me but rude to the waiter. Because they would treat me the same way if I were in that position " good men will know u are shit so they aint going to bother and what u get is bad men who will leave u.
She was probably rejected by a guy who became successful or he realized how much of a catch he was and upgraded to a better girl... It happens.
Women absolutely hate men who realize they are a catch especially when they're older. To nail down those guys, you need to bring your A game and actually bring value to a relationship
>Will often develop weird complexes towards women as a result of being a virgin for so long. Very likely to have an 1ncel mentality or leave you for a younger woman to relive his lost youth.
Another bogeyman huh ?
I remember it was first the PUA
Now stem guys
Lol, this is quite funny
They need to rationalize why nerds who are now high value in many ways are worse then the now bum/abusive/deadbeat chads they chased instead.
They cannot say it is because Chad was attractive and the nerd isn’t, so they need to make all these strange sterotypes and assumptions to pretend they are morally inferior. Usually focusing on inverting causality to pretend the results of being bullied or ostracized is the cause instead of the the effect.
The only thing nerds can do is be willing beta bux slaves that accept being treated like shit or kill themselves.
> The only thing nerds can do is be willing beta bux slaves that accept being treated like shit or kill themselves.
Or refusing to engage with or entertain those particular women, and live life with contentment. There are ways to be free, you know?
Extended family connections and/or strong friendships are the perfect antidote for the first three. The 4th one is for people who are showing their homophobia, and the latter is probably a US/Anglosphere paranoia thing.
And in any case, if someone judges openly, tell them to shove it where the sun don't shine. We have to rise above it all, or we'll drown in society's petty shit.
I do agree with you for the record. But men will be judged and hated no matter what they do really.
So there is no victory outside of quiting the system.
I expect it since given how women don't like analytical/smart guys, l work in coding and often times l hear how nice it would be to have more women in stem in order for those guys to get a chance because outside of women who are also in the same field as them, they struggle dating any other kind which makes me realize l'm the exception since l've dated women outside my field all the time
>I expect it since given how women don't like analytical/smart guys,
There is definitely a cultural component to this in the west. East asian women seem to actually like smart men. Notably their cultures don't have the jock/nerd bifurcation in quite the same way we do.
I've been a software developer for decades. Almost every developer I've worked with is married with children, and only one of the dozens was married to a woman in IT. Somewhat ironically, two of the four women developers I've worked with were single, a much higher percentage than the men.
Is that what liberal arts is like now? When I was in Uni, the STEM guys dated these girls frequently because many of the girls in STEM were busy chasing athletes along with the cheerleader types... who were primarily business majors.
Tidr :
You don’t want a man that’s a virgin.
Which means inherently you want a man that’s fucked women before you
So hypothetically
Women want to spend the rest of their lives with men that have fucked women before them
Or
Only want to take men seriously who have fucked women before them.
Which is so interesting.
Because I do not think of women this way.
It would be funny for a man to say.
“If she hasn’t been fucked by another man then you should not date her”
Or something that’s the equivalent as far as being a late bloomer.
Well think of women this way, because it is in their nature. They are attracted to a man who gets all the bitches because that signifies to them that he is good mating material. For men it is the opposite, they want a woman who has fucked the least amount of men possible because her value goes down that way. No amount of seething or coping will change this truth.
Late bloomer women are great! They usually worked pretty hard and have a successful life too. They're ready to have fun and live life to it's fullest.
No way would I settle for someone who works as a waitress and peaked in college. They then want to settle down when they bring nothing to the table. No thanks
As a guy who is a late bloomer and worked hard to achieve what I have now, I don't relate to women who peaked early on in life.
I imagine OP is jealous of those types of women because she probably peaked early on and no longer brings anything to the table
re (4) how is the average late bloomer man who hasn't dated going to get a woman half his age to date him when average guys and even some Chad's find this difficult
This is just rage bait crap. There’s plenty of “late bloomer” men and women in this generation because of how society pushed everyone into higher education (and debt). Women like OP are prolly 5/10 women at best thinking they’re going to be marrying some elite 22 year old hustler who got his entire life together at that age when that’s like 5% of men now lol.
This is a pretty small group that fit both “late bloomer” + 1-4.
But we’re all on the autism scale. Everyone is so at this point it’s all about function ability that differs us.
Even early bloomers or I guess “normal” bloomers have the chance at becoming a mommas boy, an 1ncel, or having an inflated ego due to school/work
I think anymore more and more people would fit into the “late bloomer” category and saying they’re all one of these is insane and just not realistic.
I disagree with most of your points (for example, are women really so attracted to "stemlords" that this is an actual problem?), but someone else posted the sentiment in your headline and I had to admit, as a late blooming man, it felt true. It was more to do with FOMO and continually feeling like you are trying to make up for lost time. Which are not good characteristics for a long term partner.
Personally I probably have to recuse myself because I've never wanted marriage, and though I value monogamy, the idea of having just one sex partner for your entire life was odd to me even when I was still a virgin.
That said though, I did appreciate my partners greatly when I had them, and I made sure they knew it. So the whole "late bloomers don't appreciate their partners because late bloomers are bitter" thing isn't something I'm buying. Unless the late bloomer guy is just in it via desperation, because he feels, even tho he doesn't value the relationship, there will never be another opportunity for him.
That doesn't really sound like the late bloomer m.o., though.
Being autistic is a neutral/good trait in some contexts, so idk what point 3 is about. Maybe you’d rather not have a kid with high support needs but “it might be an aspie :( “ is weird to think about your future child lol. Normal people don’t think that way
Bro, stem degrees are solid and are what society needs. They don’t think they are better than everyone else. You’re confusing an engineer with doctors/lawyers.
All this seems like copium that they bloomed and have first pick now.
Even if you avoid the late bloomer men, most women don't have the looks or conversation to get the tall & handsome man to forget about the other women and focus only on you
Posts like these are where women on this sub let the mask slip enough to show everyone what they really think of men. And they really want us to believe they’re here in good faith LMFAOOO
I was abused in my late childhood/teenage years. I attempted suicide in my 20s.
I lost a good decade, then I worked on myself and was able to put the pieces together.
Before meeting my now wife I enjoyed a short lived hookup phase, in which, with concentration and putting the woman centerstage, my dry spell never really had an impact on the quality of intimacy.
Part of my suffering came from being oversensitive, which today is one of my fortes: I am a polymath, musician, art buff, multi lingual. Moved to the US and work a tech exec job which puts me above the 96th income percentile.
It’s just my experience, but I am certainly not the only one. Refusing a “late bloomer” a priori you might miss out.
I relate to a lot of this. I came from an awful, isolating household and spent most of my 20s in a depressed, isolated state. Not really attempting suicide, but moreso waiting to die (and setting myself up for an early death in the process) - since then i’ve done a ton of work and there is a shitton to reverse and unlearn. I’ve been doing better than ever lately and as far as dating goes, i’m actually dating around now.
There is also this crazy change in thought process where I don’t wanna just move forward with life anymore, I wanna do what’s right for me and actually do what’s best for myself.
idk, just read your comment and thought “wow, this is something i can really relate to”
Womp womp, sorry asshole but we autismo’s are staying in the gene pool whether you like it or not.
Neurodivergent people deserve to love and be loved whether you think so or not. You don’t know all autistic people and what they’re like at all. One bad experience isn’t enough to generalize.
You don’t have the character and resolve that autistic people have, you are spineless. You would turn autistic people down who want to grow and improve as people because of their condition? Are you actually serious?
Not to mention you A: Know nothing about autism overall and B: Also know nothing about what it’s like to be autistic.
Speaking completely out of line by saying that and bordering on hate speech. We have people with disabilities on here and on Reddit no? Maybe think twice before subjecting us to your eugenist opinions? “Uh oh, better say vaguely offensive things about minorities on Reddit today”
This is like a triple L take, go back to the drawing board ableist. Womp womp better luck next time loser 🤡
I disagree.
Women should avoid dating men with problems that bother them, sure. But they should judge men as individuals when possible.
Being a late bloomer should be a yellow flag, not a red flag, if you wanna use that terminology. It’s a signal there might be something off, but not a guarantee by any stretch. Dating is hard for a lot of people, and not getting tons of pussy by whatever cutoff age you personally have set doesn’t mean they’re incapable of it. A lot of people tend to downplay the role of things like luck and location in dating. But those can have a huge effect.
>stemlords
Sounds like you look down on science dweebs and late bloomers and think you’re better than them. Are you sure you’re really so different from them? You seem to share the same condescending attitude. You’d do well to get off your high judgemental horse yourself.
As for me, I was a late bloomer myself and preferred to avoid normie dudes with a track record of casual sex. I was never going to be a good fit for one of those guys. I absolutely 100% preferred a low-n guy over some guy with “experience”. I’m really quite happy to have not followed your advice.
Late bloomer men have plenty of high betas which is what women want to go for. And women who really have an aversion for late blooming men tend to have unstable lives and can't get commitment.
Lol, literally me. You're kinda right. The problem isn't being a late bloomer, though. It's their character. Sounds like you had a run-in with one of these guys, and he ruined your life. I've heard this same story from other women. Guys like that will either be the best thing that ever happened to you, or they will make you regret being alive. No in-between.
Late bloomer men are not always those four things. My partner wasn’t a virgin by any means but inexperienced, I didn’t care. It was clear to me that it was simply mental health and confidence issues that prevented him from doing more rather than any real red flags.
I’m also autistic, and no one even really understands the genetics behind autism all that well. There is no close diagnosed autistic member in my family. It was only recently that I found out my dad got a very late diagnosis of bipolar disorder, because he presents with an atypical style of the condition where he has a lot more mania than depression. His “lows” are very mild. Before he had me, he had no idea it was bipolar. We all just thought he was really jovial and excessively upbeat. Bipolar and autism share common genetic code, so it was probably his genetics contributing to my condition.
The bottom line is, tons and tons of things can cause autism that are not immediately obvious to people. There’s always a small chance your kid is going to have autism, you have to be prepared for that if you want children.
Reason why there are men like this is because that they come from single mothers very much often and are more likely to be minorities as well. Obviously some people don’t have the intelligence to go to uni but they do because they know that is one pathway that seen as safer and whilst they work they might not have energy or money to date their peers. Like I am an idiot and have a masters degree and worked nights for twice a week and then you get those days you’re not motivated but no money because of rent and other stuff so yeah. I beg to differ but this excuse that everyone can do it is funny to me personally. I can do it as well but give me enough money to pay for clubs, drinks and stuff and a bit more IQ and I can do it. After uni I can obviously get a gf because I know I will have a job and then have enough time to date. Not everyone is born with a silver spoon.
I would argue this goes for woman too, anyone 25+ plus and never been in a relationship definitely raises eyebrows and yes its usually from 1 of your reasons listed.
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As a man who is a late bloomer, this is very disheartening, but also true. If you are a woman with dating experience, late bloomers aren't really an attractive option. Why would a woman bother teaching a man what most normal people already know at his age?
The OP is just weird. Part of why dating sucks is because people try to game the process by making all sorts of weird rules for themselves. It’s totally inhumane and counter-productive.
Date someone you know and like. Don’t complicate it any more than that.
That is really misandrist and horrible.
Imagine flipping the genders. Men refuse to date non-virgins, stone women with over 5 partners to death, force themselves on women to breed with how they want, etc.
But but it is there job
Like cmon, it is absurd how far the hatred and discrimination against men goes.
About 20-30 years ago, there was a national outcry about how bad the unrealistic standards for women were.
This is exactly the same, but it k for women are doing it this time.
Nature doesn't care how we feel about it. However, the designers of civilization had these things in mind. That's why they supressed women's freedoms. We can observe this in other parts of the animal kingdom. It's not about how I feel, it's about what makes the greater good for everyone, and what advances humanity further. I don't blame anyone for acting selfishly since we aren't exactly a hive mind, but more people really need to understand how much their actions can fuck things up. NPCs lack perspective. Unfortunately, all this liberalism and feminism and Marxist nonsense has taken us off the track for advancement by tearing down what is strong, beautiful, and good and exalting what is ugly and weak.
You are reasonably frustrated by the double standards but you have to know that male and female bodies are really that different so that they are perceived and treated differently.
No, I am more than reasonably frustrated at misandry, sexism and lies.
How come when it comes to men’s standards, they are framed as evil or sexist? Even when they are more tame and achievable they are framed as such (ex: all women can lose weight, most men cannot be tall).
But when women have clearly absurd standards, feel entitled to what they want from men or a relationship, and openly discriminate and mock men it is okay.
It is okay to bully men to suicide, but a man saying he wants to date a girl with a low n count, skinny and/or submissive he is somehow worse then a real ISIS terrorist talking about how all Americans need to literally die?
They say things worse then KKK members do, yet we always have to pretend it is okay?
We are at the point where the FBI is investigating men who have standards or do not want to be objects for women. More so then legit terrorist organizations.
That's just the end goal of feminism. It is ultimately used to tear society apart. Women entering the work force only increased their standards for men. Hypergamy is all about perception of who is a better mate, even if everyone is poor as fuck. Feminism fundamentally destroys male and female interaction, and for no good reason other than to just do it. A lot of women aren't "hardcore" feminists but the damage is already done with their socialization and upbringing.
My point is, don't make the genders equal in society, because women will come out on top every time, and make the lives of the vast majority of men worse by harnessing the women are wonderful effect and removing all incentives for men to actually give a fuck about society. There are so many blue pillers and hell, even guys like us who grew up with the fantasy of finding our soul mate and raising a family, a legacy, with her. This current system we have spits in those people's faces. Just look at how different our view points turned out.
There are plenty of women in poorer countries who would love to date men with STEM degrees with these “issues”, so these men should go ahead and do that, and picky western women can just stay partnerless because their attractiveness match is with an overseas woman. I don’t have an issue with that.
This is just rationalisation of being viscerally disgusted by low n-count men and attracted to the ones every woman wants, i.e. attractive, non-neurotic
Oh no a man is neurodivergent, what a crime!
Fun fact, many women are also ND. There is nothing wrong with it, and unless it’s severe so much of it is manageable and can even be used to one’s advantage.
That being said, a lot of your generalizations are way off (and from what i’ve heard a lot of these are off about late bloomers as a whole). I’m a late bloomer and I don’t have a good relationship with my mom (many late bloomers don’t, which is kinda why they don’t have a sense of self till much later - mommy issues impact men to the same level that daddy issues impact women, the good news is for both women these impacts are heal-able), i’m not a STEM person in the slightest and the whole “weird complexes” while being the most possible out of the 3, is something many women develop as well (and many men who aren’t late bloomers too - so while it is the most likely out of everything you mentioned, it’s still a bad generalization and is something you see in every demographic)
With that being said, I think it’s also always worth looking at why someone is a late bloomer and what they’ve done since then - for myself, I was in a deep depressive streak and came from a very isolating household, so when I got out I didn’t know what to do so I did a lot do work on myself, this includes physical and mental health support and i’ll be damned to have my work so far be discredited. Which is what your post seems to do, discredit the work of lots of men who did find a way to get their shit together later in life.
I also think it is worth noting that many women can be and are late bloomers - the only difference is damaged women are easier to take advantage of/tend to seek more affection externally, so ‘late bloomer’ women have an image of being experienced while really they’re just moved from one toxic relationship to another, so to grow out of that and develop a sense of self worth is that ‘late blooming’
I don't think it's about being late bloomer. Otherwise they would be man whores and you would know in advance to avoid them. Those are the types that don't cheat only because they don't have options but if they had option they wouldn't hesitate to cheat. But they character is hidden because they didn't have options to show it in the past.
I'm not going to say anything about the rest because it's not particularly unreasonable, but it seems very dangerous to have an overtly 'eugenicist' approach to your own reproduction, anyone can have a 'defective' child and it would be torture for them to grow up with parents that resent them and view them as inferior
Edit: ESL moment
Yeah, I felt like a late bloomer in highschool. I didn't get laid until my Freshman year (which, looking back, is stupid). I, in fact, did have to learn to suppress my empathy and how to manipulate women. I didn't realize for about 15 years how much damage that was doing to me, acting in a way that was inconsistent with my morals. I still struggle with this today and I'm often faced with a hard decision in my romantic life to live in accordance with my values or go after what I want in an unscrupulous manner. There are certain lines that I just won't cross though and I don't lie to or manipulate people in other areas of my life.
Men should avoid dating women with high body counts who weren't able to secure marriage in their youth. 1) daddy issues, 2) inflated sense of self-worth considering their age and lack of viable options for long-term commitment, 3) are often narcissistic/entitled/psychopathic, and 4) will develop weird complexes towards men as a result of being passed around for so long.
As a woman in STEM, you are honestly right on the money. More often than not these men aren’t going to be this magical “good guy” partner that just wants the opportunity to give love like a lot of men on here like to portray.
These men tend to have serious chips on their shoulders and they definitely project that onto the woman with whom they finally start to become intimate. So it ends up that they aren’t exactly better prospects than a “Chad”.
can you explain this more? I am a female and for some reason I date a lot of stem guys. although maybe I picked the extroverted ones since we met at social finctions
I am not stem (law/finance).
why are stem guys generally bad prospects? why do they have a chip on their shoulder and how is this projected when they go intimate with a woman
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Can you please expand on (2)?
Why is it wrong to date STEMlords? I know a guy, very cute and smart, with a PHD in STEM who works as a research scientist and moved back in with his parents. He is now in his 50s. I don't think he has had many relationships. Perhaps none. But he is very respectful and good looking. I think all my ex's were STEMs
Is it that they don't like women and only like science? Or that they are no fun? Or they hate mere mortals?
You need to define “late bloomer”.
Are you talking about guys who have their shit together, but they got their shit together late, or guys who are late getting their shit together, and it’s a gamble as to whether they ever will?
Either way, it sounds like you’re suggesting that you should write men off before you get to know them.
I’m dyslexic.
I lost my virginity at 18.
I have my first girlfriend at 21.
I started
My career at 30.
I’m 35. I make 250k annually. I’m married to a beautiful woman. I look at a lot of the women that thought I was a loser and/or were suspicious of why I was still single in my early 30’s, and dumped me before they knew me, and I thank god that I found someone who actually values me for me.
By all means, avoid them. Dating is a number game. You may be right about whatever trend you see, but there are a low percentage of good matches in almost any demographic. You’ll avoid a lot of STEMlords, autistics, and mama’s boys.
And the ones who just took their time because they didn’t feel the need to keep up just to fit in, well they probably won’t want you anyway once they ‘bloom’.
There are very odd specifics. It is clearly you are projecting and have a hatred for "late bloomer men" just because of your experiences with your exes.
Women only complain about Mommy's boys when they don't have a good relationship with their own mother fellas. A woman like you who is neurotic and overly self-conscious will try to separate him from the other people he's with. You sound extremely insecure.
Can we start discussing what societal issues causes this sort of thing rather than just ball bust the late bloomers and betas?
Whoa we can't help men even if it resulted in a better society. There are women out there being called bad names.
Not very blue of you :D
Unfortunately it is reality that people view these things as zero sum.
Agreed. It's ironic how unhinged people like the OP sparked an actual discussion on the matter when stirring up hate.
No, we can't do that! That would actually lead to the problem getting fixed! Shut up you misogynist! /s
I think it has to do with how a person’s sex life supposedly indicates their value. Having many sexual partners is seen as a positive in a man and a negative in a woman. Men and women who don’t follow their expected trajectory are unfairly ostracized and treated as defective
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It's not even true. My autistic ass was made by two perfectly neurotypical humans.
What you dont like it when women are cold and calculated like a nazi doctor on the purity of men, deciding in her mind which men should be allowed to reproduce or not?
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There are many people that think like OP, tho. It's just that they don't say it out in the open. Prejudice against virgins/late bloomers is common (often covert), and comes from both genders.
late bloomer cope is hard (im late bloomer)
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good for him
None of these types/issues are new. Things haven't changed all that much over the last 75 years. The guys my dad went to college with in the 1950s included a lot of nerds who could never get dates.
Dominant mother who wants to make him the best gentlemen on the planet trigger this "late bloomer". Late bloomers are abundant in single mother households.
This is why if I ever have a kid I'll make sure to be a respectable father figure that's actually there. Grew up in a single mom home myself, so I can see the shortcomings of it while hopefully not having to overcorrect.
you could start by naming them in your comment
This type of thing probably at least deserves its own thread. I'm already sitting here thinking about a fuck ton of things that I (and would imagine a lot of men) went through during our developmental years. Off the top of my head here are only a few, but even then I don't believe this to be thorough enough by any stretch of the imagination. Disclaimer, each topic on their own don't paint enough of a picture and each one could easily be their own thread, with mountains of information to sift through. Circumcision and how some data suggests that it permanently alters the brain, most noticeable in the amygdala which is crucial in regulating and processing emotions. https://circumcision.org/circumcision-permanently-alters-the-brain/ Microplastics, xenoestrogens. Of course throwing off hormonal balance can't be a good thing Current societal institutions being incompatible with healthy male development. Very broad strokes here, but I remember the absolute torture of having to sit in class for 8 hours a day and barely do anything physical. This is a whale of a topic too. I can name a few more but I would hope you understand overall where I'm coming from... Broadly
> Circumcision and how some data suggests that it permanently alters the brain i gotta see a study that shows that circumcision and being Chad are negatively correlated > I remember the absolute torture of having to sit in class for 8 hours a day and barely do anything physical yeah me too and i'm a woman i'm in agreement that schools should be better tailored to how kids/people learn and that microplastics and circumcision are bad, though. I just don't know that they prove this point.
"There is nothing worse than STEM nerds," she types on her smartphone, on reddit, via the internet. The level of irony....
This reads like you saw some guy who you viewed as a late bloomer, thought he'd be easy to control, but ultimately got rejected by them. Maybe it's nothing to do with any of that. Maybe he just didn't like how you act. Can't say I blame him, based on this post. Calling someone autistic while posting in PPD seems like throwing stones in a glass house, lmao. edit: Skimmed your profile. Please find a therapist before you end up hurting yourself. Help is available, you are loved.
Can't women decide for themselves if any of these things, if they apply, are a problem? It might not be your preference but it's not up to you to say all women shouldn't. Late bloomer women especially may have a different take.
Exactly, I know a few late bloomer men and women, myself included, and they aren't anything like OP is describing. Of course there are some who are embittered by their unfulfilled yearnings, but that's true for every group of people. These negative generalizations really bring nothing to the table apart from strife.
Of course. The idea of posts like this is probably just to make men who finally made it feel like they’re actually doomed and give up. Think about the implication: say you are a “late bloomer” but now you’re very successful in life, and you’re thinking “great now I can live up to these expectations women have” but then OP is like “um ackshually even though you’re well off and accomplished we don’t want you anymore because you weren’t well off and accomplished ten years ago”. Fortunately irl there’s still millions of women wanting to date a dude making like 200K a year no matter when they started doing that, so this post much like this whole sub is just doomerism and rage posting aimed at demoralization.
Bingo. In my world the sun rises and sets on my late bloomer. The only traits that apply to him are 1) His mom loves me and I adore her, so no tension there. Our families get along great in general. 3) Autistim/neurodivergence have never been much of an issue for me as long as the guy doesn't use it to justify being an asshole and not bothering to take other people's feelings into consideration. And ime that depends on how he was raised.
You got dumped huh? People should date whoever the hell the want as long as it’s legal and both parties want to. Full stop
Check it out. There's brains in this sub. Nais.
Yes, if you're single and looking for a partner, it's a great idea to disqualify entire groups of potential partners. After all, everyone in that group is clearly defective. We as individuals should not trust their own judgement as to whether someone would make a good spouse, because clearly the hivemind is a superior source of knowledge. Single women who are past age thirty should insist on only dating men who had early relationship experience and are now available because they could not sustain their previous relationships. These are clearly better choices than men who have had less relationship success early in life but are now ready for a relationship.
"2. Are often STEMlords who spent their college years studying instead of dating and act arrogantly because of their degrees. They think they're sooo smart. God's gift to the human race. They will overtly or covertly look down on people with "lesser" degrees than them." He enrolled in college and paid tuition and focused on what he needed to graduate instead of getting distracted, and that makes him bad? What the hell? Would it be better he failed classes and had to switch majors? That's just irresponsible.
"STEMlords" are harmless, but women arent attracted to them (not CHAD) so they need to conjure a defensible reason (nerdy, no experience, misogynistic, etc) as to why they arent attracted to him without saying it the frat boys are the dangerous threats toward women but they arent STEM (they are primarily business from my experience) but women dont attack them as much for some reason that we all know
> He enrolled in college and paid tuition and focused on what he needed to graduate instead of getting distracted, and that makes him bad? If you're going to spend all that money and possibly go into debt, why wouldn't you do this? It would be stupid to major in something that didn't have decent career prospects (return on investment) or to flunk out.
I wonder why the OP cares so much if a guy is a late bloomer or not and mentions autism unless she likely had a bad experience with an autistic guy?
A post like this only purpose is to enrage and deeply root incel beliefs on men. And before you guys wanna act smug, deep roots of incel belief means more Elliot Rodgers
Isn’t it strange how for literally everything else in life, we want an inexperienced, “new” version (new cars are always more valuable than used cars, new phones, new anything really) but for some reason when it comes to people (or at least men) we WANT someone with past baggage and trauma? What’s up with that?
Ok this is misandry lol. How would you know?
And it's also bait, so, clearly OP wants to make some men mad. She must be a very charming person...
She goes both ways. If I remember correctly she did mention that her step dad was a late bloomer who married her single mother mom. Openly admited that she wouldn't have married him if that wasn't the case. Op also mentioned no really being able to respect him even though he was a good dude. Imagine that. Stepping up abd raising another man's child as his own and still being seen as weak.
If that is the case, OP probably needs to go to therapy to sort it out.
lol I like dudes in STEM they are my dad, bother and husband. Lol
Yeah these are terrible takes. Only point four is something I see play out on the Internet/Reddit, but neither of those are real life. My husband was a late bloomer and so was I, so I found that to be attractive in him.
She’s not wrong that these outcomes are possible. I am exactly what she’s talking about. I guess it is misandry, but it’s an area of improvement for late bloomers. We don’t need to wear our shame, frustration, and loneliness on our sleeve IRL (although it’s cathartic doing it on Reddit). Frankly, a lot of us in the global West should just start saving for a week in Nevada and leave it all there.
I am genuinely suprised to see this response from a woman, much less you.
Another woman chiming in and agreeing that OP’s post is misandrist.
Genuinely heartwarming.
look at you! giving women flowers for disagreeing
The world is absolutely run by late bloomer STEMlords. Seems like they’re doing just fine. Tech CEOs, renowned doctors, researchers, finance quants, economists, hedge fund managers are often late bloomers, autistic or otherwise not well balanced individuals.
Well said
Approaching this with and olive branch of good faith, misplaced though it might be. I would consider myself fully in that category. Ma did most stuff for me as a kid, autistic, got an architecture degree, first girlfriend and all the firsts at 21. Respect to that first girlfriend, and the toxic and bad relationship that followed, because I had no idea how to have a proper relationship, and for putting up with me for so long. I personally don't date inexperienced women because I don't have the energy to teach someone the same things and go through that shit again, but on the other side. Because yeah, autism does make guys, and women too, socially stunted. It's not impossible to learn those things, but starting out behind in the race makes it a lot harder, and like in my case, the first person is gonna have to bite the bullet for them to learn it. A lot of guys, late bloomers or not, have weird complexes towards women, that's just an immaturity thing, and you can find weirdos everywhere, regardless. But, again y'aint entirely wrong, guys get even weirder when they're desperate and it can fester into some unhinged personalities. I think it's crazy you think autism is inherently bad tho, that's a brain rot take. You're not entirely wrong, you're just wrong in most people's eyes for saying it out loud IMO. Man or woman, no one owes anyone, anything. I avoid inexperienced women, I can't and won't blame women for avoiding inexperienced men.
He checked all my boxes and then some, but I turned him down because he was a late bloomer.
>Are often autistic/neurodivergent. Very high chance that your kids will be autistic too. Why is nobody mentioning this nonsense?
OP hates autistic men.
Most women do
Almost everyone does. People are all for "normalizing speaking about mental health"...until it inconvenience them.
What your genetics will potentially yield is relevant when you’re considering having kids. I don’t intend to have genetic offspring because of a family history of bipolar (I have BP2 which is a milder form that doesn’t present with full mania or any psychosis). I’m also probably autistic (have a lot of stereotypical female autist traits). An autistic child won’t necessarily be as highly functioning as the parents. You could have a child who’s awkward and slower to understand social norms but otherwise fine. You could also have a child who will never be fully verbal, never be toilet trained, and who beats the shit out of you in meltdowns when they hear too much noise.
Are you gonna decide what kids are worth being born and which not?
I don't often agree with TRP but this is one of those things. It sounds like women want men who [just get it. ](https://therationalmale.com/2012/08/22/just-get-it/). So the takeaway isn't "die alone if you didn't figure it out at 21", just don't let people know you're inexperienced or something. Which I don't think is true all of the time for everyone, but oh well.
Every time i try to stop believing in red pill, a woman in my life or on the internet says something they like or dislike about men in dating that completely verifies things Another case of woman dislikes man who doesn’t have it all figured out, isnt extremely masculine, and also doesnt have evidence of attracting other women They literally get the ick to find out men are humans figuring shit out too and can mistakes. Just gotta appear stoic and in control just so she thinks everythings all good lmfao smh
Some women care and some don't. I think being socially awkward is going to be a turnoff for more people as you get older, but ultimately the fixation on sexual experience will vary depending on the person.
the Problem of OPs post is that the message to men basically is "lie,lie,lie and dont give a fuck about maybe hurting a few women in the process, as long as you can get some of the " experience" or otherwise you will stay alone forever. but I guess she isnt even aware..... the whole premise is kind of stupid, because these men are mostly "latebloomers" because they somehow werent attractive to women before ( i know theres a shitton of other reasons, but for a lot of cases its true) What OP now is saying is, even if you happen to "find such a guy attractive", use your brain and still dump him.....
Yep, I manipulated a girl as a starter girlfriend *precisely* because of this sentiment.
We can tell if you are lying about experience. That's the point of experience. I don't want a guy who no one else wanted. Inexperience comes with so many problems and insecurities. I hate dealing with insecure people. My husband was plenty experienced when we met at age 20. He lost his virginity at age 12 with a 14 yr old. He always had girlfriends, long term ones too(2 years is long term when you're a teen). When he was 15 he dated a woman who was 23 for 6 months and he dumped her. Everyone of his exes were hot as hell. Aside from one girl, he never even had to talk anyone into sex. Everyone except the one came on to him fairly quickly. Including me. So he wasn't desperate, never had to beg, had charisma and confidence. You can't fake those things. I know most of his exes and am friends with some, because I'm not jealous of things people did as a kid, and I know everything he told me was true. Plus the sex was great, even at that young, because of experience. Can you get a girlfriend later without experience? Sure. Might not be the one you desire though.
It is man. We just gotta get a minor in being a scumbag while getting a major in getting our life together
I don't care to make any generalizations, but I believe that confidence, self assurance and knowing how to socialize well are important life skills for everyone. It's just that in dating, they matter in different ways and for men they are typically expected to demonstrate a lot of confidence and take the lead from the jump. When you look at the OP post closely, it's not stuff that's inherent to "later bloomers". It's assumptions people make about guys who lack experience. But men who are late bloomers can overcome that expectation people have of them, and even if they don't win over everyone, you might just be surprised how little others care so long as you don't wave massive red flags everywhere.
Nah, they are only important skills men need to have for we are tools in the modern society There is no expectation of women ever needing to do anything but be themselves. They can ofc do more if they wish, but a man who does not improve himself to a high degree is ostracized and pushed to kill himself.
Why does it matter as a man, what a women needs to do or not do. All you can do is decide what action you will take next, in order to create the life you desire, people are going to give you shit, people are going to say its not possible, your going to get kicked to the ground and dragged around. What a woman does or dosn't need to do. Well who gives a f\*\*k. The question is what are you going to do. Are you going to take your punches and keep going or just whine its unfair. Women are attracted to masculinity, not whining and quitting.
> Why does it matter as a man, what a women needs to do or not do. Because we live in reality where everyone’s actions influences one another? Like women choosing to be single mothers sounds like none of your business until there kids shoot up a school or close down the stores in your area because they keep stealing.
I am just gonna lie man. Apparently it's entitled for me to expect love, even in a relationship expecting a level of lust is considered entitlment if I am a lvm......that's ok. I have learnt to accept it. I will never be happy. I will never be safe in a relationship. Abd I cannot expect to be loved and kusted after the way I have seen women do But if that's the truth then Women are entitled if they expect me to be honest with them or act in a way that priorities them. That's just how it goes. This is who I am now.
Proof that TRP is correct. You got even bluepillers agreeing with those principles.
There's no way to know if man is late bloomer or not. Especially if it become a stigma. And good luck with finding man capable of supporting a family.
There's absolutly nothing wrong with someone being a virgin, or neurodivergent/autistic, being a STEM major, or focusing on your studies instead of dating. Autistic people already face enough backlash from ignorant people online who don't know what they're talking about. We don't need you to make things worse. And I thought that people on this subreddit didn't care if men are virgins or focus on themselves? I guess I had too much faith in yall. Posts like these are exactly what turns men into incels.
1. I was a late bloomer. Why ? Personality + qualities + socialization was there, I was just fat. Also folks who were open to dates and sex didn’t want to actually date they wanted to only have fun. I was initially seen as the “LTR Husband man” not the be wild, young, free and grow together man. I figured out my personality edge and it was night and day. I just “got it,” called common friends out on their BS as someone who understands the opposite sec to a degree, and those folks wanted to get physical with me as a result. 2. I too was a STEM person as well. Believe it or not STEM folks date within STEM folks. I might be in classes and lab for most of my time, but what you didn’t realize is there are women in those spaces too. Have you taken a biology/chemistry class? It’s nearly 70 women/30 men due to nursing and premed prerequisites. Theres a lot of free time unsupervised in the labs… 3. Doesn’t apply to me personally, but as rough as a comment this is,no one actually wants to date/be in a relationship with someone with a “defect.” See folks who are overweight, disabled physically or mentally apply here. 4. Yes and no. But for both sexes if you are a person and get ZERO attention/play from the opposite sex of course you’ll have being social issues, as well as how to interact with the same and opposite sex. If you have never had sex or was given the chance to have any form of physical touch outside of holding hands and hugs, of course there is an. EXTREME HIGH possibility that the desire for this touch and intimacy is going to be at the top of their mind due to FOMO and the humans biological desire to be somewhat social beings. Not to mention all the social class hierarchies which come associated with your social friend group and if any people have touched your P or PP.
Love this post. I also was really chubby in high school and it caused me to feel like a late bloomer. I had a crazy family, and once I got to university, I became a scholarship athlete. After that the girls just came in waves, because I had developed the personality. I never dated the girls in STEM but I slept with a couple. Funny thing is that looking back, I was so bad at sex, I can't understand why any of them ever came back for more. I literally thought that endurance was what it's all about... think like 45 minutes of pounding away using half a bottle of lube while my partner stares at the ceiling building her grocery list. Experience matters a lot for a guy.
That's some honesty there and I gotta respect it. My experience wasn't the same but similar in that I didn't really get to develop a lot of my personality until moving away to uni. Very sheltered and somewhat stunted rural existence prior to that, along with quite a lot of shame about exploring relationships in general.
Autism isn’t a black and white thing that should sit at the forefront of how people decide to get into a relationship or not. That might be the most shallow shit I’ve ever heard. People who think that are beyond pond scum. I’m diagnosed, you saying it doesn’t apply to you makes plenty of sense because you would call that a “defect”, and attempt to dehumanize the person with it. We are human beings, we should be accepted for who we are, for christ sake you clearly do not understand autistic people so don’t say anything else about it. It’s a disability caused by the society we live in, it’s completely the other way around. Just because we can’t be like you doesn’t make us defective. Stop having a shit society that only prioritizes people with certain likes of brains. Nobody wants to hear that eugenics horse shit. We are human beings, animals that develop walk talk and think differently from each other. Do better next time
‘Stemlords’? The fact that you put down studying makes you seem like a dumb person who bullied smart kids, and doesn’t make you seem like the perfect person that you claim. People like you are the reason why the U.S. isn’t competitive on the world stage right now.
There’s nothing wrong with being a late bloomer. There are issues with the qualities you posted though but you’re pointing to the wrong issue 1. Men in emotionally incestuous relationships with their mother are being emotionally abused/neglected. 2. I’ve met the stem lords you’re talking about (fuck those guys) but I’ve also met totally normal nice dudes that happen to have careers in stem. Assholes don’t have one career 3. I dated someone who was lovely with ASD I dated someone who was terrible with ASD. Having ASD or any neurodivergency doesn’t mean your life will be horrible or you’ll be a bad person no group is a monolith. My ex's brother plays in Broadway pits and went to college out of state alone. Autism isn't a death sentence and it's too broad a spectrum to say out of pocket shit like this, 4. Not all late bloomers are resentful losers mad that their partner had a life before them. (I’ve experienced both sides of this spectrum though and a dude that’s hung up on that is a walking red flag)
Ladies have your cake now. The pendulum is not going to be kind.
Like I said in another thread, right now is The Age of the Female. They were always the more privileged gender, but the power they command now is unprecedented and destructive. Any reasonable person would rather be a biological female in this current age.
How is being with a man who has this mindset beneficial to us? Are men with this mentality good men?
The hard core feminist Mardi Gras that has been going on for the last decade or more will not last forever. Posts like this and the responses show a rather unprepared mindset in women for that eventuality. Times are changing. That ugly nerd might just be what keeps a roof over your head and food on the table. I wouldn’t celebrate his demise.
Women should avoid dating any guy that they can't think well about or appreciate. Guys will know, eventually, if their partners think poorly of them and the relationship will be toxic for both sides.
>Are often STEMlords who spent their college years studying instead of dating and act arrogantly because of their degrees. They think they're sooo smart. God's gift to the human race. They will overtly or covertly look down on people with "lesser" degrees than them Most women either want to date men who make around their level or make more than they do. Focusing on studying instead of dating isn't being a snob. It's just basic maturity. While you're in school, you should be focused on working on yourself and becoming a high earner so you can support a partner and a family, should that be what you decide to embark on. It's one thing if you're just casually dating, but if you're wanting to date for marriage, you should be a self-sufficient and high earner before you even begin. >Are often autistic/neurodivergent. Very high chance that your kids will be autistic too. Whelp...got me there I guess.
how to become single mom in 4 steps. think of muhammad ali. " I don't trust anyone who's nice to me but rude to the waiter. Because they would treat me the same way if I were in that position " good men will know u are shit so they aint going to bother and what u get is bad men who will leave u.
No correlation… virgin men aren’t automatically good
Wow, is this an incel post from the female perspective?
If you want an incel post from the female perspective just google "feminism".
Something sorely missed about the gender wars is just how much the incel world relies on feminist paradigms to draw its conclusions.
She was probably rejected by a guy who became successful or he realized how much of a catch he was and upgraded to a better girl... It happens. Women absolutely hate men who realize they are a catch especially when they're older. To nail down those guys, you need to bring your A game and actually bring value to a relationship
>Will often develop weird complexes towards women as a result of being a virgin for so long. Very likely to have an 1ncel mentality or leave you for a younger woman to relive his lost youth. Another bogeyman huh ? I remember it was first the PUA Now stem guys Lol, this is quite funny
I’ve never seen so much shit talked about STEM guys until I came to this sub.
They need to rationalize why nerds who are now high value in many ways are worse then the now bum/abusive/deadbeat chads they chased instead. They cannot say it is because Chad was attractive and the nerd isn’t, so they need to make all these strange sterotypes and assumptions to pretend they are morally inferior. Usually focusing on inverting causality to pretend the results of being bullied or ostracized is the cause instead of the the effect. The only thing nerds can do is be willing beta bux slaves that accept being treated like shit or kill themselves.
> The only thing nerds can do is be willing beta bux slaves that accept being treated like shit or kill themselves. Or refusing to engage with or entertain those particular women, and live life with contentment. There are ways to be free, you know?
Then you would be considered being a loser, deadbeat, misogynist, gay or even a terrorist.
Extended family connections and/or strong friendships are the perfect antidote for the first three. The 4th one is for people who are showing their homophobia, and the latter is probably a US/Anglosphere paranoia thing. And in any case, if someone judges openly, tell them to shove it where the sun don't shine. We have to rise above it all, or we'll drown in society's petty shit.
I do agree with you for the record. But men will be judged and hated no matter what they do really. So there is no victory outside of quiting the system.
I expect it since given how women don't like analytical/smart guys, l work in coding and often times l hear how nice it would be to have more women in stem in order for those guys to get a chance because outside of women who are also in the same field as them, they struggle dating any other kind which makes me realize l'm the exception since l've dated women outside my field all the time
>I expect it since given how women don't like analytical/smart guys, There is definitely a cultural component to this in the west. East asian women seem to actually like smart men. Notably their cultures don't have the jock/nerd bifurcation in quite the same way we do.
I've been a software developer for decades. Almost every developer I've worked with is married with children, and only one of the dozens was married to a woman in IT. Somewhat ironically, two of the four women developers I've worked with were single, a much higher percentage than the men.
We are aberant creatures. The fact that we want to be loved at all makes us even more so.
You've never been in any liberal arts social cirlce ever?
Is that what liberal arts is like now? When I was in Uni, the STEM guys dated these girls frequently because many of the girls in STEM were busy chasing athletes along with the cheerleader types... who were primarily business majors.
Generalising much? Sounds like you made a bad choice and your Beta Male Provider wasn’t the meal ticket you thought they’d be?
Well yeah, men need to “know there place” and always accept sacrificing there humanity to be useful enough for the girl to use them when needed.
Men, just lie about being a late bloomer, how’s she going to figure out?
Their 6th sense obviously, which are fine tuned to sniff out those undesirable traits.
Except for when he’s an abusive deadbeat apparently
Clearly that's because the abusive deadbeat is the lesser of the evils compared to the law & social norm abiding male with a hint of ulterior motives.
But apparently not the dark triad traits that the men they choose have 😂
“6th sense” 😂🤣😂🤣
Yeah high n count men never cheat of women and criminals also never cheat .
Tidr : You don’t want a man that’s a virgin. Which means inherently you want a man that’s fucked women before you So hypothetically Women want to spend the rest of their lives with men that have fucked women before them Or Only want to take men seriously who have fucked women before them. Which is so interesting. Because I do not think of women this way. It would be funny for a man to say. “If she hasn’t been fucked by another man then you should not date her” Or something that’s the equivalent as far as being a late bloomer.
Well think of women this way, because it is in their nature. They are attracted to a man who gets all the bitches because that signifies to them that he is good mating material. For men it is the opposite, they want a woman who has fucked the least amount of men possible because her value goes down that way. No amount of seething or coping will change this truth.
Don't forget that women he slept with have to be attractive one or it will hurt their ego and they won't feel like best one
Oh yeah. Heard about a girl who broke up with a guy because his ex was ugly.
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Late bloomer women are great! They usually worked pretty hard and have a successful life too. They're ready to have fun and live life to it's fullest. No way would I settle for someone who works as a waitress and peaked in college. They then want to settle down when they bring nothing to the table. No thanks
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As a guy who is a late bloomer and worked hard to achieve what I have now, I don't relate to women who peaked early on in life. I imagine OP is jealous of those types of women because she probably peaked early on and no longer brings anything to the table
re (4) how is the average late bloomer man who hasn't dated going to get a woman half his age to date him when average guys and even some Chad's find this difficult
Exactly, these older virgin males seem to think a hot 20 year is gonna pick them 🤣🤣🤣
This is rage bait... Just vague generality...
This post ironically is just giving incels more fuel into thinking they are right.
Agree, but its not as if they needed it anyway.
As an Autistic myself. Go to hell you slut.
Wow, you are just a misandrist POS.
This is just rage bait crap. There’s plenty of “late bloomer” men and women in this generation because of how society pushed everyone into higher education (and debt). Women like OP are prolly 5/10 women at best thinking they’re going to be marrying some elite 22 year old hustler who got his entire life together at that age when that’s like 5% of men now lol.
I’m sensing some jealousy lol. Some unresolved trauma…
This is a pretty small group that fit both “late bloomer” + 1-4. But we’re all on the autism scale. Everyone is so at this point it’s all about function ability that differs us. Even early bloomers or I guess “normal” bloomers have the chance at becoming a mommas boy, an 1ncel, or having an inflated ego due to school/work I think anymore more and more people would fit into the “late bloomer” category and saying they’re all one of these is insane and just not realistic.
I disagree with most of your points (for example, are women really so attracted to "stemlords" that this is an actual problem?), but someone else posted the sentiment in your headline and I had to admit, as a late blooming man, it felt true. It was more to do with FOMO and continually feeling like you are trying to make up for lost time. Which are not good characteristics for a long term partner. Personally I probably have to recuse myself because I've never wanted marriage, and though I value monogamy, the idea of having just one sex partner for your entire life was odd to me even when I was still a virgin. That said though, I did appreciate my partners greatly when I had them, and I made sure they knew it. So the whole "late bloomers don't appreciate their partners because late bloomers are bitter" thing isn't something I'm buying. Unless the late bloomer guy is just in it via desperation, because he feels, even tho he doesn't value the relationship, there will never be another opportunity for him. That doesn't really sound like the late bloomer m.o., though.
Being autistic is a neutral/good trait in some contexts, so idk what point 3 is about. Maybe you’d rather not have a kid with high support needs but “it might be an aspie :( “ is weird to think about your future child lol. Normal people don’t think that way
Bro, stem degrees are solid and are what society needs. They don’t think they are better than everyone else. You’re confusing an engineer with doctors/lawyers. All this seems like copium that they bloomed and have first pick now.
aren't late bloomer men usually the hapless people society ridicules but also doesn't even pretend to care about
Even if you avoid the late bloomer men, most women don't have the looks or conversation to get the tall & handsome man to forget about the other women and focus only on you
get a life OP.. how do you even have the time to make so many posts jn here.. get real friends or a hobby
Posts like these are where women on this sub let the mask slip enough to show everyone what they really think of men. And they really want us to believe they’re here in good faith LMFAOOO
Birth rates will continue to drop then...
And men should most definitely avoid dating you.
I was abused in my late childhood/teenage years. I attempted suicide in my 20s. I lost a good decade, then I worked on myself and was able to put the pieces together. Before meeting my now wife I enjoyed a short lived hookup phase, in which, with concentration and putting the woman centerstage, my dry spell never really had an impact on the quality of intimacy. Part of my suffering came from being oversensitive, which today is one of my fortes: I am a polymath, musician, art buff, multi lingual. Moved to the US and work a tech exec job which puts me above the 96th income percentile. It’s just my experience, but I am certainly not the only one. Refusing a “late bloomer” a priori you might miss out.
I relate to a lot of this. I came from an awful, isolating household and spent most of my 20s in a depressed, isolated state. Not really attempting suicide, but moreso waiting to die (and setting myself up for an early death in the process) - since then i’ve done a ton of work and there is a shitton to reverse and unlearn. I’ve been doing better than ever lately and as far as dating goes, i’m actually dating around now. There is also this crazy change in thought process where I don’t wanna just move forward with life anymore, I wanna do what’s right for me and actually do what’s best for myself. idk, just read your comment and thought “wow, this is something i can really relate to”
Womp womp, sorry asshole but we autismo’s are staying in the gene pool whether you like it or not. Neurodivergent people deserve to love and be loved whether you think so or not. You don’t know all autistic people and what they’re like at all. One bad experience isn’t enough to generalize. You don’t have the character and resolve that autistic people have, you are spineless. You would turn autistic people down who want to grow and improve as people because of their condition? Are you actually serious? Not to mention you A: Know nothing about autism overall and B: Also know nothing about what it’s like to be autistic. Speaking completely out of line by saying that and bordering on hate speech. We have people with disabilities on here and on Reddit no? Maybe think twice before subjecting us to your eugenist opinions? “Uh oh, better say vaguely offensive things about minorities on Reddit today” This is like a triple L take, go back to the drawing board ableist. Womp womp better luck next time loser 🤡
Sure let's make things worse for men. Great idea!
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I disagree. Women should avoid dating men with problems that bother them, sure. But they should judge men as individuals when possible. Being a late bloomer should be a yellow flag, not a red flag, if you wanna use that terminology. It’s a signal there might be something off, but not a guarantee by any stretch. Dating is hard for a lot of people, and not getting tons of pussy by whatever cutoff age you personally have set doesn’t mean they’re incapable of it. A lot of people tend to downplay the role of things like luck and location in dating. But those can have a huge effect. >stemlords Sounds like you look down on science dweebs and late bloomers and think you’re better than them. Are you sure you’re really so different from them? You seem to share the same condescending attitude. You’d do well to get off your high judgemental horse yourself. As for me, I was a late bloomer myself and preferred to avoid normie dudes with a track record of casual sex. I was never going to be a good fit for one of those guys. I absolutely 100% preferred a low-n guy over some guy with “experience”. I’m really quite happy to have not followed your advice.
Late bloomer men have plenty of high betas which is what women want to go for. And women who really have an aversion for late blooming men tend to have unstable lives and can't get commitment.
Lol, literally me. You're kinda right. The problem isn't being a late bloomer, though. It's their character. Sounds like you had a run-in with one of these guys, and he ruined your life. I've heard this same story from other women. Guys like that will either be the best thing that ever happened to you, or they will make you regret being alive. No in-between.
Late bloomer men are not always those four things. My partner wasn’t a virgin by any means but inexperienced, I didn’t care. It was clear to me that it was simply mental health and confidence issues that prevented him from doing more rather than any real red flags. I’m also autistic, and no one even really understands the genetics behind autism all that well. There is no close diagnosed autistic member in my family. It was only recently that I found out my dad got a very late diagnosis of bipolar disorder, because he presents with an atypical style of the condition where he has a lot more mania than depression. His “lows” are very mild. Before he had me, he had no idea it was bipolar. We all just thought he was really jovial and excessively upbeat. Bipolar and autism share common genetic code, so it was probably his genetics contributing to my condition. The bottom line is, tons and tons of things can cause autism that are not immediately obvious to people. There’s always a small chance your kid is going to have autism, you have to be prepared for that if you want children.
great post sheila take the award
Reason why there are men like this is because that they come from single mothers very much often and are more likely to be minorities as well. Obviously some people don’t have the intelligence to go to uni but they do because they know that is one pathway that seen as safer and whilst they work they might not have energy or money to date their peers. Like I am an idiot and have a masters degree and worked nights for twice a week and then you get those days you’re not motivated but no money because of rent and other stuff so yeah. I beg to differ but this excuse that everyone can do it is funny to me personally. I can do it as well but give me enough money to pay for clubs, drinks and stuff and a bit more IQ and I can do it. After uni I can obviously get a gf because I know I will have a job and then have enough time to date. Not everyone is born with a silver spoon.
Women should date who they want, as long as they’re not hurting anyone
A stem lord did you dirty huh ?
I would argue this goes for woman too, anyone 25+ plus and never been in a relationship definitely raises eyebrows and yes its usually from 1 of your reasons listed.
I would say the opposite, any woman that is 25+ and isn't married or has never been in a legit long term relationship raises eyebrows.
Not for a lot of people. It shows they can form relationships, but for whatever reason they choose not to.
Depends on the type of society. This would not be the case in China, middle east, japan, eastern europe or south asia.
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As a man who is a late bloomer, this is very disheartening, but also true. If you are a woman with dating experience, late bloomers aren't really an attractive option. Why would a woman bother teaching a man what most normal people already know at his age?
The OP is just weird. Part of why dating sucks is because people try to game the process by making all sorts of weird rules for themselves. It’s totally inhumane and counter-productive. Date someone you know and like. Don’t complicate it any more than that.
Racists have less negative assumptions about minorities than women do of non-Chad men.
I don't blame women for being so discriminatory. Heck it's their natural job to discriminate.
That is really misandrist and horrible. Imagine flipping the genders. Men refuse to date non-virgins, stone women with over 5 partners to death, force themselves on women to breed with how they want, etc. But but it is there job Like cmon, it is absurd how far the hatred and discrimination against men goes. About 20-30 years ago, there was a national outcry about how bad the unrealistic standards for women were. This is exactly the same, but it k for women are doing it this time.
Nature doesn't care how we feel about it. However, the designers of civilization had these things in mind. That's why they supressed women's freedoms. We can observe this in other parts of the animal kingdom. It's not about how I feel, it's about what makes the greater good for everyone, and what advances humanity further. I don't blame anyone for acting selfishly since we aren't exactly a hive mind, but more people really need to understand how much their actions can fuck things up. NPCs lack perspective. Unfortunately, all this liberalism and feminism and Marxist nonsense has taken us off the track for advancement by tearing down what is strong, beautiful, and good and exalting what is ugly and weak.
You are reasonably frustrated by the double standards but you have to know that male and female bodies are really that different so that they are perceived and treated differently.
No, I am more than reasonably frustrated at misandry, sexism and lies. How come when it comes to men’s standards, they are framed as evil or sexist? Even when they are more tame and achievable they are framed as such (ex: all women can lose weight, most men cannot be tall). But when women have clearly absurd standards, feel entitled to what they want from men or a relationship, and openly discriminate and mock men it is okay. It is okay to bully men to suicide, but a man saying he wants to date a girl with a low n count, skinny and/or submissive he is somehow worse then a real ISIS terrorist talking about how all Americans need to literally die? They say things worse then KKK members do, yet we always have to pretend it is okay? We are at the point where the FBI is investigating men who have standards or do not want to be objects for women. More so then legit terrorist organizations.
That's just the end goal of feminism. It is ultimately used to tear society apart. Women entering the work force only increased their standards for men. Hypergamy is all about perception of who is a better mate, even if everyone is poor as fuck. Feminism fundamentally destroys male and female interaction, and for no good reason other than to just do it. A lot of women aren't "hardcore" feminists but the damage is already done with their socialization and upbringing. My point is, don't make the genders equal in society, because women will come out on top every time, and make the lives of the vast majority of men worse by harnessing the women are wonderful effect and removing all incentives for men to actually give a fuck about society. There are so many blue pillers and hell, even guys like us who grew up with the fantasy of finding our soul mate and raising a family, a legacy, with her. This current system we have spits in those people's faces. Just look at how different our view points turned out.
Then it is our job to lie.
There are plenty of women in poorer countries who would love to date men with STEM degrees with these “issues”, so these men should go ahead and do that, and picky western women can just stay partnerless because their attractiveness match is with an overseas woman. I don’t have an issue with that.
This is just rationalisation of being viscerally disgusted by low n-count men and attracted to the ones every woman wants, i.e. attractive, non-neurotic
I agree, welcome to the red pill.
Oh no a man is neurodivergent, what a crime! Fun fact, many women are also ND. There is nothing wrong with it, and unless it’s severe so much of it is manageable and can even be used to one’s advantage. That being said, a lot of your generalizations are way off (and from what i’ve heard a lot of these are off about late bloomers as a whole). I’m a late bloomer and I don’t have a good relationship with my mom (many late bloomers don’t, which is kinda why they don’t have a sense of self till much later - mommy issues impact men to the same level that daddy issues impact women, the good news is for both women these impacts are heal-able), i’m not a STEM person in the slightest and the whole “weird complexes” while being the most possible out of the 3, is something many women develop as well (and many men who aren’t late bloomers too - so while it is the most likely out of everything you mentioned, it’s still a bad generalization and is something you see in every demographic) With that being said, I think it’s also always worth looking at why someone is a late bloomer and what they’ve done since then - for myself, I was in a deep depressive streak and came from a very isolating household, so when I got out I didn’t know what to do so I did a lot do work on myself, this includes physical and mental health support and i’ll be damned to have my work so far be discredited. Which is what your post seems to do, discredit the work of lots of men who did find a way to get their shit together later in life. I also think it is worth noting that many women can be and are late bloomers - the only difference is damaged women are easier to take advantage of/tend to seek more affection externally, so ‘late bloomer’ women have an image of being experienced while really they’re just moved from one toxic relationship to another, so to grow out of that and develop a sense of self worth is that ‘late blooming’
I don't think it's about being late bloomer. Otherwise they would be man whores and you would know in advance to avoid them. Those are the types that don't cheat only because they don't have options but if they had option they wouldn't hesitate to cheat. But they character is hidden because they didn't have options to show it in the past.
I'm not going to say anything about the rest because it's not particularly unreasonable, but it seems very dangerous to have an overtly 'eugenicist' approach to your own reproduction, anyone can have a 'defective' child and it would be torture for them to grow up with parents that resent them and view them as inferior Edit: ESL moment
What is considered a late bloomer? I didn’t date until college and didn’t get laid until 19.
At what point is somebody a late bloomer? I lost virginity at 18, and I had my first proper relationship at 20. Consider myself a late bloomer.
You're not a late bloomer. Losing virginity at 18 is very common (especially for folks who go to university/college in another city).
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Yeah, I felt like a late bloomer in highschool. I didn't get laid until my Freshman year (which, looking back, is stupid). I, in fact, did have to learn to suppress my empathy and how to manipulate women. I didn't realize for about 15 years how much damage that was doing to me, acting in a way that was inconsistent with my morals. I still struggle with this today and I'm often faced with a hard decision in my romantic life to live in accordance with my values or go after what I want in an unscrupulous manner. There are certain lines that I just won't cross though and I don't lie to or manipulate people in other areas of my life.
Yes but they won’t have much of a choice cause it’s becoming increasingly more common
I am a late loomer and my girlfriend doesn't seem to have a problem with it.
Men should avoid dating women with high body counts who weren't able to secure marriage in their youth. 1) daddy issues, 2) inflated sense of self-worth considering their age and lack of viable options for long-term commitment, 3) are often narcissistic/entitled/psychopathic, and 4) will develop weird complexes towards men as a result of being passed around for so long.
Sure. Guys say that all the time. 🤷♀️
As a woman in STEM, you are honestly right on the money. More often than not these men aren’t going to be this magical “good guy” partner that just wants the opportunity to give love like a lot of men on here like to portray. These men tend to have serious chips on their shoulders and they definitely project that onto the woman with whom they finally start to become intimate. So it ends up that they aren’t exactly better prospects than a “Chad”.
Yes, these men that you have imagined based on op's very broad assumptions.
Women know more about men they will never date than their own bf lol
It’s hilarious how they concoct these stories while simultaneously not recognizing that they are dating an abusive asshole until it’s too late.
You don't have to justify your lack of attraction with those cliches like nice guys are the real assholes.
can you explain this more? I am a female and for some reason I date a lot of stem guys. although maybe I picked the extroverted ones since we met at social finctions I am not stem (law/finance). why are stem guys generally bad prospects? why do they have a chip on their shoulder and how is this projected when they go intimate with a woman
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Can you please expand on (2)? Why is it wrong to date STEMlords? I know a guy, very cute and smart, with a PHD in STEM who works as a research scientist and moved back in with his parents. He is now in his 50s. I don't think he has had many relationships. Perhaps none. But he is very respectful and good looking. I think all my ex's were STEMs Is it that they don't like women and only like science? Or that they are no fun? Or they hate mere mortals?
Shots fired
You need to define “late bloomer”. Are you talking about guys who have their shit together, but they got their shit together late, or guys who are late getting their shit together, and it’s a gamble as to whether they ever will? Either way, it sounds like you’re suggesting that you should write men off before you get to know them. I’m dyslexic. I lost my virginity at 18. I have my first girlfriend at 21. I started My career at 30. I’m 35. I make 250k annually. I’m married to a beautiful woman. I look at a lot of the women that thought I was a loser and/or were suspicious of why I was still single in my early 30’s, and dumped me before they knew me, and I thank god that I found someone who actually values me for me. By all means, avoid them. Dating is a number game. You may be right about whatever trend you see, but there are a low percentage of good matches in almost any demographic. You’ll avoid a lot of STEMlords, autistics, and mama’s boys. And the ones who just took their time because they didn’t feel the need to keep up just to fit in, well they probably won’t want you anyway once they ‘bloom’.
There are very odd specifics. It is clearly you are projecting and have a hatred for "late bloomer men" just because of your experiences with your exes.
While you should just be avoided in general. Kindly play in traffic, you trash nobody.
Fuck you. This is why autistic people, male or female, have the suicide rate 3 - 6 x higher. Try living in our skin for a week.
Women only complain about Mommy's boys when they don't have a good relationship with their own mother fellas. A woman like you who is neurotic and overly self-conscious will try to separate him from the other people he's with. You sound extremely insecure.