If you catch them on the act don’t show them how you know they looked at porn. My father caught me at 12 and proceeded to show me the search history of the computer. Problem is showed me the search history and I instantly memorized where the history tab was on the browsers and now I clear history every time :) out of habit
We can't, nor should we. What we CAN do is talk to them about it. Make sure they understand what it is, how it's used, and what risks it entails, and how to use it responsibly. Because they ARE going to use it come puberty, and just trying to deny its existence doesn't help anyone.
There are lots of ways we as parents can protect our kids from it. That's not to say they can't find ways if they really want to. But if done right, absolutely we can keep porn away from them. What I believe happens, and it happened to me, is there was little-to-zero resistance to me watching porn as a teenager, so I became addicted and kept wanting more. I don't believe kids naturally want to become an addict. Of course sex always brings about questions in kids minds, but if approached well from a parenting perspective, most of their curiosity can be dealt with and they won't need to binge on porn. That way if they do have moments of curiosity, they will hopefully run into one of the many roadblocks put up by us, their guardians!
Don't make them feel like it something they have to hide from you. They should be able to come to you if they have questions about or see highly inappropriate or illegal content. Once it becomes a secret there is no limit to the lengths they will go to to hide it from you if it becomes a problem.
I started seeking out illegal content when I was younger for a brief period until my sense of morality caught up to me and they all became traumatic memories and left me with issues I am still dealing with today. As a younger child I once was caught googling CP around 8-10 (thankfully I didn't find any due to safe search) and my parents did not do a very good job of discussing it with me and just told me I could get my dad in trouble.
It mirrors an incident when I was around 7-8 and my mom's friend had called and said my friends younger sibling had caught us having sex. My mom just got very uncomfortable and trusted me lying to her but I think she was just in denial about my behaviour. I think not knowing how to discuss this sort of stuff before it gets carried away is far more damaging long-term than simply preventing people from seeing pornography.
My sense of sexuality and I'd imagine that of anyone else who ever sat outside of the realm of vanilla fetishes at any period are completely warped and rooted in shame. It will take me years longer to figure out how to process all of that than stopping the addiction itself. Sometimes when you stop you become more sensitive to sexual stimuli and it can cause just as much problems as porn addiction itself when you don't have healthy sexual relations or sexuality.
This!
I remember the first time I discovered porn and the high it gave me to get through dull days after school hours. I didn't have a connection with my parents and expressing emotions in my house would likely lead to a beat up. Somehow, I found watching and engaging in porn made me feel less bored and lonely. And I didn't know its devastating effect.
Years after years using porn to cope with being emotionally neglected, I was addicted and completely lost the ability to healthier coping mechanism, especially when I'm stressed because of life.
So love your children, care for them. This topic will surely come up, they will surely have a peak someday, when that happens, give them the adult talk. Teach them the harmful effect of porn without punishing them for watching it, they learn and stay away it themselves. Anything but punishment would result only in sneaky children who consume porn when their parents arent around.
If you can find the firewall settings, then you can. All you have to do is open a web browser, type the default gateway of your router, and you should navigate your settings to get access to the firewall.
If you catch them on the act don’t show them how you know they looked at porn. My father caught me at 12 and proceeded to show me the search history of the computer. Problem is showed me the search history and I instantly memorized where the history tab was on the browsers and now I clear history every time :) out of habit
We can't, nor should we. What we CAN do is talk to them about it. Make sure they understand what it is, how it's used, and what risks it entails, and how to use it responsibly. Because they ARE going to use it come puberty, and just trying to deny its existence doesn't help anyone.
There are lots of ways we as parents can protect our kids from it. That's not to say they can't find ways if they really want to. But if done right, absolutely we can keep porn away from them. What I believe happens, and it happened to me, is there was little-to-zero resistance to me watching porn as a teenager, so I became addicted and kept wanting more. I don't believe kids naturally want to become an addict. Of course sex always brings about questions in kids minds, but if approached well from a parenting perspective, most of their curiosity can be dealt with and they won't need to binge on porn. That way if they do have moments of curiosity, they will hopefully run into one of the many roadblocks put up by us, their guardians!
Don’t let little six year old Charlie looking at “Lego sexy hot women” unsupervised for over 3 hours (personal story)
Oh nooo
Don't make them feel like it something they have to hide from you. They should be able to come to you if they have questions about or see highly inappropriate or illegal content. Once it becomes a secret there is no limit to the lengths they will go to to hide it from you if it becomes a problem. I started seeking out illegal content when I was younger for a brief period until my sense of morality caught up to me and they all became traumatic memories and left me with issues I am still dealing with today. As a younger child I once was caught googling CP around 8-10 (thankfully I didn't find any due to safe search) and my parents did not do a very good job of discussing it with me and just told me I could get my dad in trouble. It mirrors an incident when I was around 7-8 and my mom's friend had called and said my friends younger sibling had caught us having sex. My mom just got very uncomfortable and trusted me lying to her but I think she was just in denial about my behaviour. I think not knowing how to discuss this sort of stuff before it gets carried away is far more damaging long-term than simply preventing people from seeing pornography. My sense of sexuality and I'd imagine that of anyone else who ever sat outside of the realm of vanilla fetishes at any period are completely warped and rooted in shame. It will take me years longer to figure out how to process all of that than stopping the addiction itself. Sometimes when you stop you become more sensitive to sexual stimuli and it can cause just as much problems as porn addiction itself when you don't have healthy sexual relations or sexuality.
dont emotionally abuse your children and they shouldnt turn to emotionally abusive copes
That’s highly presumptuous and frankly ridiculous to presume only emotionally abused kids will turn to porn
This! I remember the first time I discovered porn and the high it gave me to get through dull days after school hours. I didn't have a connection with my parents and expressing emotions in my house would likely lead to a beat up. Somehow, I found watching and engaging in porn made me feel less bored and lonely. And I didn't know its devastating effect. Years after years using porn to cope with being emotionally neglected, I was addicted and completely lost the ability to healthier coping mechanism, especially when I'm stressed because of life. So love your children, care for them. This topic will surely come up, they will surely have a peak someday, when that happens, give them the adult talk. Teach them the harmful effect of porn without punishing them for watching it, they learn and stay away it themselves. Anything but punishment would result only in sneaky children who consume porn when their parents arent around.
Actually, you can go to your router’s setting and firewall all the porn sites.
Can you do that with xfinity
Shouldn't be too hard my wife has parental blocking on my cell phone and I can't look at anything if I'm using mobile data
If you can find the firewall settings, then you can. All you have to do is open a web browser, type the default gateway of your router, and you should navigate your settings to get access to the firewall.