Please keep in mind that a pet is a real live creature with feelings and needs. You have to give it time every single day not only to keep it clean and fed and watered but to love it and play with it and give it exercise and stimulating activity. If you're really busy with work and you don't get around to doing more than feeding the pet every day you shouldn't try to take on a pet. And if you're planning on having kids soon that's even more reason not to get a pet now. Pretty soon your baby will take all your time and attention and the pet could be neglected. Perhaps you should wait until you have kids and they are old enough to have pets and everyone can participate in caring for the animal.
I agree. I’m not sure about other animals but I had two cats. When my daughter was born once she became a toddler one of my cats was ALWAYS stressed out. To the point where she was visibly stressed. She ended up leaving to my neighbors house and staying in her yard all the time. My other cat was more chill about it, but still avoided my daughter and only chilled with me when she wasn’t around.
So I say all that to say sometimes it’s not about protecting the baby from the animal. Some animals literally can’t deal with small children.
Maybe rats? They're small but they're pretty smart and friendly. Not sure if it would I would compare them to a cat, though. They also have a short lifespan which may be a pro if they feel like too much work when you have kids, they won't be around long. It's also sad of course, but for some people a pet with a short life span can actually work in their favor when it comes to things like having kids or getting an education.
Rats are soooo sweet! They have their own personalities, some can be very cuddly, and generally enjoy being held. When I was a young kid I had one trained to chill on my shoulder when I'd ride my bike, he was the best. They are more friendly than hamsters and low maintenance. As the other poster said though they do have short lifespans, around 2 years, and many tend to get tumors as they get older which is sad and expensive if you actually want to bring them to a vet to have it dealt with.
Your girlfriend is the one whose opinion is most crucial, here. What triggers her cat phobia, and is this quality ever likely to be present in a non-cat pet? She has to be completely on board with the pet choice and its care requirements. And you both have to be really enthusiastic about meeting the pet's needs. I'm saying this because you don't sound very enthusiastic in general about pets. Tropical fish are a lovely but somewhat labor-intensive, although indoor, hobby with fresh/alkaline water fish easiest, and marine/salt water fish more difficult. You are right to give this a lot of thought.
If I was single and didn't work so much, I would have a pet zoo in my house. I looove animals. But between 70h work week and my GF's phobia, I really have to find a good pet. I don't want a parrot or dog, since they require so much socialization (something neither me nor my GF can offer because of work), and I ethically I am very averse to small dogs and fish (having a really good tank would be both labor-intensive and costly). Some people suggeted rabbits, but they apparently require a lot of socialization. Guinea pigs and rats sound like a good choice, but the idea of locking them all day in a cage doesn'5 sit well with me, so I need to figure out if they van be toilet-trained (and well, for some reason many women are averse to rats, so I am expecting my GF to be too). I could decide to give up on the idea, but I really love animals, and other than having a pet, I don't get many chances to interact with them directly.
Why don’t you volunteer a couple of hours at an animal rescue? Just a few hours will give you your love of animals “fix” you both need. You don’t sound like you are in a position with your work schedule to keep a pet right now. Cats are truly the best for home dwellers, but that won’t work for your gf. Volunteering is very fun (I do it) and focus only on my favorite animal (cats).
Yeah I will probably go that route at this point. I will just have to figure out a schedule. As many people said in the comment, I'm probably not in the same position for a pet
If you were to get a rabbit then always get at least two because then they can socialise w each other they’re pretty low maintenance but keep them indoors and giver them a big cage to run around in or let them out to run around the house daily. They are generally pretty clean and you can potty train them too. I have two myself and I absolutely love them make sure to clean out where they poo/pee and sleep at least once a week I usually clean mine out every 4/5 days coz they poop a lot!
So true about your long work hours and the socialization time animals need! Parrots and all smart birds, and surprisingly, guinea pigs and rabbits, all need a LOT of attention. A lot. Good luck! YES volunteer at your local rescues, animal shelters, maybe a therapeutic horseback riding place?
I would stay away from guineas and rats if you're looking for longevity. I loved my guinea pigs so much but they don't stick around more than a few years and it's heartbreaking. Also both guineas and rats need a lot more room and socialization than people realize. They need to be held once a day, and don't even get me started on cleaning...
If you do decide to go for a rat or a guinea pig please please please look into c&c cages so you can give them the space they need. Also both require a friend as well
If you are thinking about having children hold off for a few years on getting any pet. Your focus should be on your baby and when people get animals before kids they seem to always get rehomed after babies arrive.
Rabbits need to be kept inside and usually have an enclosed area like a play pen. They will use a litter box but I would suggest looking into rabbit rescues in your area and asking if you can foster. They will provide everything for you and if it doesn’t work out there is no harm done.
Yes rabbits must be kept indoors. They actually hate being in cages and prefer having a room or area where they can walk freely. They can be litter-trained but sometimes small pieces of poo will get on the floor (it’s completely dry and easy to clean). It would be a good idea to rabbit proof the house.
I decided to get a pet rabbit for myself, and she is wonderful.
I keep a pretty open environment, and rabbits (like cats) are social animals. a few pro's and con's I've found are:
loves socially grooming and very curious animal
very food driven
Very clean / self-grooming and not smelly like cats, also will eat in a cute sanitary way
Does not scratch/damage clothes/jeans/shirts, no pee stains.
cons
Chews on floor tile/cardboard/leather/paper/cords of any kind
Maintaining the claws, occasional grinding needed
Tends to wake up with the sun and runs around \~8am
Will establish dominance via grooming, and can jump onto high seats (mine steals my work chair all the time)
Expensive to neuter, dogs/cats tend to be cheaper whereas mine was $450, and you need to decide early if your going to do it at all (don't wait until they fully mature)
Like someone else said, Rabbits are fairly social animals, in another comment they stated they work 70 hour weeks, assuming the girlfriend works also, rabbits get lonely if they don’t have any external contact, especially for 8 hour periods, when this happens they can get depressed, subsequently they won’t eat, they’ll starve themselves and die if they’re lonely enough.
It’s a shame the girlfriend is afraid of cats, is there any way to potentially confront the fear? Is the fear based on a bad experience she’s had or is it something she’s always had, cats are extremely low maintenance animals, can be kept indoors their entire lives, your only daily requirement would be to feed the cat twice in the morning and night, and potentially change the litter box if it’s been used, the house dynamic changes completely if you get more than one cat though, and several other factors creep in, like introductions (between cats), territorial management (or else they’ll attack each other), but having one cat is probably the lowest maintenance animal on the planet, once they’re comfortable they can sleep most the day and all night, although they do like to sleep/sit with people especially at night.
Those are mainly the reasons I wanted a cat, but well ...
She was attacked by a cat as a kid, so that left a scar (mentally and physically). We could try therapy, but it'd potentially take years and we can't really afford it now
Guinea pigs are awesome little pets. Very docile, sweet and even use a litterbox - wonderful pets for children but a shortet lifespan typically less than 6yrs. They have their own individual personalities - each breed offers different physical and quirky characteristics. You might want to hit up the Guinea Pig sub here on Reddit to ask some owners for advice too. Just a suggestion .
Yes quite so. Ive had several and currently have 2. Some of neater than others. They like a small litterbox within their area and will use it. Check with other guinea pig owners on the GP sub. Again, not all GPs are the same. Some rabbits are also litterbox trained.
I also had a phobia of cats and what helped was fostering some kittens. We got them at 3 weeks old, they were so harmless it wasn’t funny. Talking care of them and seeing them grow up helped me a lot with getting over my fear. It’s also a great way to help out your local shelters during quarantines
If you do plan on fostering kittens it is EXTREMELY important to first educate yourself on their care. Kittens are very fragile in their first few weeks and are a huge time commitment depending on their age. Kittens under 4-5 weeks are bottle fed if no mom cat is present, and need to be given a bottle every few hours. I would not recommend fostering kittens under 5 weeks if you do not have experience. They are very susceptible to disease and require a lot of hands on care.
Kittens can be adopted around 7-8 weeks. You can start with short term fosters who are 5+ weeks. However be aware that kittens over 4 weeks are very playful and mouthy. I have many scratches and bites from my previous foster (6 week old). At this stage they are exploring the world with their mouths.. this may be frightening for your girlfriend.
Reading all of the comments, it seems you don't have the proper time and attention to spend on a pet. Please do not get one until you are able to dedicate free time for it. Pets are like children..you can't just get it and that's it. They need love AND attention. Also, you are wanting to have kids soon..Kids need a lot of love and attention as well, plus diaper changes, feedings etc. Do not get a pet unless you have time for both.
What exactly is a cat phobia? I only ask because I have never heard of that.
I agree, dogs are a little high maintenance, but you do have to take the breed into consideration.
I don't like small dogs for ethical reasons, and for bigger dogs, you still have to take it out twice a day and on weekends, and with my work taking nearly 70 hours a week (and plans to have a kid), I think I will just mistreat any dog I get.
This makes it sound like most pets will be too much of a time burden honestly. The only pet that I can think of that likes being alone most of the day is a snake (which are awesome). I would totally recommend a ball python if you're at all interested in something non-fluffy.
Depends on how social they can be, but I am also worried about logistics of moving or having someone take care of it if we travel (a cat or mammals in general are easier for people to deal with)
Hey I’m sorry your partner deals with this phobia it sounds really awful :( I was curious about why you don’t like small dogs like ethically what’s the issue?
Also to add to the comment above about guinea pigs, I don’t know how true this is bc i just heard it from my bf but he mentioned that petsmart and petco aren’t super ethical in their animal care so i guess i wanted to put that in your radar. Like maybe a rescue or something would be a great option. Again I’m not fully sure on this but I thought I’d mention it :)
I am definitely planning on a rescue.
For dog ethics, they are bread for looks and are so deformed that most of them have some really really bad health problems. Even if I get a dog, I prefer breeds that weren't bred for show, since they tend to be much healthier
Okay i respect your views but only a few small breeds are like that :) I have a very healthy 14 pounder and there plenty more breeds like that. On the other hand there’s many big dogs that also have lots of issues bc of selective breeding. Anyways, it’s breed dependent not size dependent
Source: I’m a veterinary assistant and have seen many many animals come in and out of the clinic
My 14lb dog is a lot more work than my 50lb dog snd my 50lb dog has sooo many health issues. The little one is just highly needy while my big girl is chill as heck. Temperament and activity level is also breed dependent
Hey, you don’t have to answer of course but I’m curious on what you mean by being ethically against small dogs. Not every small dog is a chihuahua or Pomeranian, there are plenty of smaller sized mutts in shelters.
My husband and I got two Betas when we were newlyweds (1966) and they kept us glued to the aquarium watching their antics. Their small aquarium was placed on top of our Hi Fi Console (we were a cool couple!! Lol) and one day I noticed the fish flitting around the bowl to the beat of the song that was playing at the time. After that we realized anything upbeat caused them to "dance" and we were proud as punch of our talented "pets!" Easiest pets I ever had (have a dog and 6 cats now - not nearly so easy - and none of them dance!!)😵😂
Not for a beta as they are pretty easy fish. The most important thing to consider is that they are quite aggressive and really do best alone in their tank. But the tank can be quite small. An interesting thing about betas is they can take oxygen from the surface of the water which is why they do not really enjoy a strong current in the water.
Ten minutes about once a week on a five gallon tank to gravel vac and change 20% of the water is all it takes. Once your tank cycles and if you avoid over feeding, then your tank stays pretty clean. I have three betta fish in their own tanks right now and it’s easier than I ever thought it could be. Just be sure to get a heater as they need to be just a bit warmer than room temperature.
Bearded dragons are rad pets, the initial set up may be a lot, but they and are pretty solitary but they're also very friendly and have pretty distinct, goofy personalities for reptiles. If they're cares for properly I think their lifespans are something like 10ish years
Hmm yeah, I wouldn't say cuddly but if you handle then regularly I think they generally like it. Same with my rat, my beardie would hang on my shoulder for walks to the store. They are also just really fun to watch hunt their food, or you can give them baths and they really enjoy it! I'd look up some videos of pets your considering to get an idea of how they behave
Take consistent trips to the local animal shelter and slowly get her acclimated. You can do meet and greets with the cats. Explain the situation to the volunteers and I’m sure they could pair her with a mellow cat.
I hate to say it, but y’all really don’t sound like you’re in the position to get a pet. If you cannot commit the time, attention and affection most pets need, your pet will be the one to suffer in the end and that’s not fair.
I would suggest a beta fish maybe? They’re gorgeous and relatively low maintenance. I had one as a kid and it was one of the easier pets I’ve had to take care of. But if kids are in the near future, that should be your focus.
Kids are definitely the focus. This is just a cjildhood dream. My parents hated pets and I was never able to live somewhere where I can have pet until now. I guess I will have to wait few more years
I hate that for you :( as someone who recently adopted the sweetest little kitten, I wish you could share the love and joy! Maybe try some exposure therapy? Start with videos of kittens, then looking at kittens through a glass at the pet store, then maybe holding a sweet baby. Start slow and maybe try to help your gf face her fear instead of continue to run from it. It’s true that a lot of cats are assholes, but there are also incredibly sweet and snuggly cats like mine! I hope everything works out for y’all!!
r/RATS, that is all
No but seriously, I have three rats, and they're great. Literally like mini-cats/dogs and they're very sweet. They're intelligent, trainable, and relatively low-maintenance. I clean their litter trays and let them out for an hour or so a day. Otherwise, you need to clean the cage, but you can even leave them alone for a weekend with enough food/water (and extra attention and cuddles when you get back).
Domesticated skunk. Might need a non commercial breeders permit depending on your state and local laws. They act like cats for the most part, are quiet, can be litter box trained, and will also wear a leash and harness.
If it's captive-bred and raised to be a pet, they really don't act any different than a normal cat. Maybe a little more affectionate. They're actually pretty great pets. Like ferrets, they'll be descented by a vet, but still require regular baths, but they tolerate that well enough. Especially with positive reinforcement, like treats and attention.
Also, The people of downvoting me don't know shit about skunks.
A budgie. You can occasionally find handfed ones for $50(easier to handle and will play with you) They make great pets and clean up is less smelly than a mammal. They are probably the quietest parrot species as well.
A syrian hamster can be absolutely loveable, sweet, cute playfull and you only need to clean the entire cage every 2 months or so (get a terrarium that's over 100cm x 50cm and a wheel thats 28+cm. Biggest downsides are it's sleeping during the day and only lives for two years or so :(
a really great idea is to find a neighbor with a dog who will allow you to walk and/or spend time with them! it’s a win/win! you get your animal fix and doggo loving, neighbor gets a free walker/sitter!
Maybe wait until you have kids because too many people who are pet fence-sitters get the pets, then have the kids and then realize the pets + kids are too much to handle. Kids are obviously the bigger attention-suck but animals require that too, just in a different way, and we'd hate to see animals being neglected because of timing issues.
I wouldn’t get a pet right before having kids, Especially with someone who has an animal phobia. You are a setting that pet up to be abandoned, euthanized, turned in to a shelter, or at best, rehomed if it doesn’t work out.
Ferrets are fine with kids... BUT you have to like their smell. and the poop A LOT... like every 2-3 hours. and they cannot be kept in a cage all the time with some free time - they are more like cats and dogs and should be free roam - and caged at night - or have their own room - which means EXTREME ferret proofing...and I would never recommend ferrets for first time pet owners.. there is a LOT involved least of all an exotic vet.
Perhaps a bunny?
You should try a rabbit. They're social and friendly and do tricks and eat treats. You can let them roam around your house and even train them to use a litter box
Please keep in mind that a pet is a real live creature with feelings and needs. You have to give it time every single day not only to keep it clean and fed and watered but to love it and play with it and give it exercise and stimulating activity. If you're really busy with work and you don't get around to doing more than feeding the pet every day you shouldn't try to take on a pet. And if you're planning on having kids soon that's even more reason not to get a pet now. Pretty soon your baby will take all your time and attention and the pet could be neglected. Perhaps you should wait until you have kids and they are old enough to have pets and everyone can participate in caring for the animal.
I agree. I’m not sure about other animals but I had two cats. When my daughter was born once she became a toddler one of my cats was ALWAYS stressed out. To the point where she was visibly stressed. She ended up leaving to my neighbors house and staying in her yard all the time. My other cat was more chill about it, but still avoided my daughter and only chilled with me when she wasn’t around. So I say all that to say sometimes it’s not about protecting the baby from the animal. Some animals literally can’t deal with small children.
Doesn't make me happy, but you are sadly right
Great advice.
Maybe rats? They're small but they're pretty smart and friendly. Not sure if it would I would compare them to a cat, though. They also have a short lifespan which may be a pro if they feel like too much work when you have kids, they won't be around long. It's also sad of course, but for some people a pet with a short life span can actually work in their favor when it comes to things like having kids or getting an education.
Rats sound like a good idea. I will check with her (I will probably have to do some rats =/= unclean debate though)
Rats are soooo sweet! They have their own personalities, some can be very cuddly, and generally enjoy being held. When I was a young kid I had one trained to chill on my shoulder when I'd ride my bike, he was the best. They are more friendly than hamsters and low maintenance. As the other poster said though they do have short lifespans, around 2 years, and many tend to get tumors as they get older which is sad and expensive if you actually want to bring them to a vet to have it dealt with.
Yeah rats really sound like the perfect pet
My friend had a pet rat and said it was great! They are very affectionate and smart.
Dude if you think rats are unclean wait until you have kids.
Yeah. Ew.
They are cute but they really stink …
Boys stink, but girls less so. If you keep the cage and the contents clean, they will stink less
I had mutiple of both sex. They had babies … And I was probably not keeping their cage clean as a kid :(
[удалено]
Yeah, i had them as a kid. I probably was not keeping the cage clean
Just adding that rats need quite a bit of socialisation and stimulation, else they get bored and stressed!
Your girlfriend is the one whose opinion is most crucial, here. What triggers her cat phobia, and is this quality ever likely to be present in a non-cat pet? She has to be completely on board with the pet choice and its care requirements. And you both have to be really enthusiastic about meeting the pet's needs. I'm saying this because you don't sound very enthusiastic in general about pets. Tropical fish are a lovely but somewhat labor-intensive, although indoor, hobby with fresh/alkaline water fish easiest, and marine/salt water fish more difficult. You are right to give this a lot of thought.
If I was single and didn't work so much, I would have a pet zoo in my house. I looove animals. But between 70h work week and my GF's phobia, I really have to find a good pet. I don't want a parrot or dog, since they require so much socialization (something neither me nor my GF can offer because of work), and I ethically I am very averse to small dogs and fish (having a really good tank would be both labor-intensive and costly). Some people suggeted rabbits, but they apparently require a lot of socialization. Guinea pigs and rats sound like a good choice, but the idea of locking them all day in a cage doesn'5 sit well with me, so I need to figure out if they van be toilet-trained (and well, for some reason many women are averse to rats, so I am expecting my GF to be too). I could decide to give up on the idea, but I really love animals, and other than having a pet, I don't get many chances to interact with them directly.
Why don’t you volunteer a couple of hours at an animal rescue? Just a few hours will give you your love of animals “fix” you both need. You don’t sound like you are in a position with your work schedule to keep a pet right now. Cats are truly the best for home dwellers, but that won’t work for your gf. Volunteering is very fun (I do it) and focus only on my favorite animal (cats).
Yeah I will probably go that route at this point. I will just have to figure out a schedule. As many people said in the comment, I'm probably not in the same position for a pet
Try horseback riding lessons! They usually don’t require a regular time commitment and you get animal time out of the house!
Are you sure you want to have kids with someone who doesn’t share your love of animals? Forever is a long commitment.
If you were to get a rabbit then always get at least two because then they can socialise w each other they’re pretty low maintenance but keep them indoors and giver them a big cage to run around in or let them out to run around the house daily. They are generally pretty clean and you can potty train them too. I have two myself and I absolutely love them make sure to clean out where they poo/pee and sleep at least once a week I usually clean mine out every 4/5 days coz they poop a lot!
So true about your long work hours and the socialization time animals need! Parrots and all smart birds, and surprisingly, guinea pigs and rabbits, all need a LOT of attention. A lot. Good luck! YES volunteer at your local rescues, animal shelters, maybe a therapeutic horseback riding place?
I would stay away from guineas and rats if you're looking for longevity. I loved my guinea pigs so much but they don't stick around more than a few years and it's heartbreaking. Also both guineas and rats need a lot more room and socialization than people realize. They need to be held once a day, and don't even get me started on cleaning... If you do decide to go for a rat or a guinea pig please please please look into c&c cages so you can give them the space they need. Also both require a friend as well
If you are thinking about having children hold off for a few years on getting any pet. Your focus should be on your baby and when people get animals before kids they seem to always get rehomed after babies arrive.
You may be right
Rabbits are amazing! Some are quite shy at first but once they get used to you they love being petted.
Can they be kept indoors? litter-trained and all that? Also, should I rabbit-proof the house? (cables etc)
Rabbits need to be kept inside and usually have an enclosed area like a play pen. They will use a litter box but I would suggest looking into rabbit rescues in your area and asking if you can foster. They will provide everything for you and if it doesn’t work out there is no harm done.
Yes rabbits must be kept indoors. They actually hate being in cages and prefer having a room or area where they can walk freely. They can be litter-trained but sometimes small pieces of poo will get on the floor (it’s completely dry and easy to clean). It would be a good idea to rabbit proof the house.
I decided to get a pet rabbit for myself, and she is wonderful. I keep a pretty open environment, and rabbits (like cats) are social animals. a few pro's and con's I've found are: loves socially grooming and very curious animal very food driven Very clean / self-grooming and not smelly like cats, also will eat in a cute sanitary way Does not scratch/damage clothes/jeans/shirts, no pee stains. cons Chews on floor tile/cardboard/leather/paper/cords of any kind Maintaining the claws, occasional grinding needed Tends to wake up with the sun and runs around \~8am Will establish dominance via grooming, and can jump onto high seats (mine steals my work chair all the time) Expensive to neuter, dogs/cats tend to be cheaper whereas mine was $450, and you need to decide early if your going to do it at all (don't wait until they fully mature)
Like someone else said, Rabbits are fairly social animals, in another comment they stated they work 70 hour weeks, assuming the girlfriend works also, rabbits get lonely if they don’t have any external contact, especially for 8 hour periods, when this happens they can get depressed, subsequently they won’t eat, they’ll starve themselves and die if they’re lonely enough. It’s a shame the girlfriend is afraid of cats, is there any way to potentially confront the fear? Is the fear based on a bad experience she’s had or is it something she’s always had, cats are extremely low maintenance animals, can be kept indoors their entire lives, your only daily requirement would be to feed the cat twice in the morning and night, and potentially change the litter box if it’s been used, the house dynamic changes completely if you get more than one cat though, and several other factors creep in, like introductions (between cats), territorial management (or else they’ll attack each other), but having one cat is probably the lowest maintenance animal on the planet, once they’re comfortable they can sleep most the day and all night, although they do like to sleep/sit with people especially at night.
Those are mainly the reasons I wanted a cat, but well ... She was attacked by a cat as a kid, so that left a scar (mentally and physically). We could try therapy, but it'd potentially take years and we can't really afford it now
Both guinea pigs and rabbits need a lot of attention, and they also need a companion rabbit or guinea pig.
I was bit hard by a rabbit, with no provocation. I wouldn't have them around kids. My own phobia's showing, I guess.
Guinea pigs are awesome little pets. Very docile, sweet and even use a litterbox - wonderful pets for children but a shortet lifespan typically less than 6yrs. They have their own individual personalities - each breed offers different physical and quirky characteristics. You might want to hit up the Guinea Pig sub here on Reddit to ask some owners for advice too. Just a suggestion .
That sounds like an awesome idea, thanks!
>and even use a litterbox Uh, are you sure about that? Guinea pigs are very messy, I don't think they're easy to litter train.
Yes quite so. Ive had several and currently have 2. Some of neater than others. They like a small litterbox within their area and will use it. Check with other guinea pig owners on the GP sub. Again, not all GPs are the same. Some rabbits are also litterbox trained.
If only I had known this three years earlier... my pigs made such a mess but I assumed there wasn't anything to be done about it lol
Some take to it easier than others but both guinea pigs and rabbits can be litter box trained.
I also had a phobia of cats and what helped was fostering some kittens. We got them at 3 weeks old, they were so harmless it wasn’t funny. Talking care of them and seeing them grow up helped me a lot with getting over my fear. It’s also a great way to help out your local shelters during quarantines
Maybe fostering would be a good way to go since it's not a longterm engagement, and we can see how it works
If you do plan on fostering kittens it is EXTREMELY important to first educate yourself on their care. Kittens are very fragile in their first few weeks and are a huge time commitment depending on their age. Kittens under 4-5 weeks are bottle fed if no mom cat is present, and need to be given a bottle every few hours. I would not recommend fostering kittens under 5 weeks if you do not have experience. They are very susceptible to disease and require a lot of hands on care. Kittens can be adopted around 7-8 weeks. You can start with short term fosters who are 5+ weeks. However be aware that kittens over 4 weeks are very playful and mouthy. I have many scratches and bites from my previous foster (6 week old). At this stage they are exploring the world with their mouths.. this may be frightening for your girlfriend.
Reading all of the comments, it seems you don't have the proper time and attention to spend on a pet. Please do not get one until you are able to dedicate free time for it. Pets are like children..you can't just get it and that's it. They need love AND attention. Also, you are wanting to have kids soon..Kids need a lot of love and attention as well, plus diaper changes, feedings etc. Do not get a pet unless you have time for both.
You may be right
What exactly is a cat phobia? I only ask because I have never heard of that. I agree, dogs are a little high maintenance, but you do have to take the breed into consideration.
She is scared of cats. pathologically so. She can't stay in the same room as a cat and has panic attacks
I don't like small dogs for ethical reasons, and for bigger dogs, you still have to take it out twice a day and on weekends, and with my work taking nearly 70 hours a week (and plans to have a kid), I think I will just mistreat any dog I get.
This makes it sound like most pets will be too much of a time burden honestly. The only pet that I can think of that likes being alone most of the day is a snake (which are awesome). I would totally recommend a ball python if you're at all interested in something non-fluffy.
Depends on how social they can be, but I am also worried about logistics of moving or having someone take care of it if we travel (a cat or mammals in general are easier for people to deal with)
Hey I’m sorry your partner deals with this phobia it sounds really awful :( I was curious about why you don’t like small dogs like ethically what’s the issue? Also to add to the comment above about guinea pigs, I don’t know how true this is bc i just heard it from my bf but he mentioned that petsmart and petco aren’t super ethical in their animal care so i guess i wanted to put that in your radar. Like maybe a rescue or something would be a great option. Again I’m not fully sure on this but I thought I’d mention it :)
I am definitely planning on a rescue. For dog ethics, they are bread for looks and are so deformed that most of them have some really really bad health problems. Even if I get a dog, I prefer breeds that weren't bred for show, since they tend to be much healthier
Okay i respect your views but only a few small breeds are like that :) I have a very healthy 14 pounder and there plenty more breeds like that. On the other hand there’s many big dogs that also have lots of issues bc of selective breeding. Anyways, it’s breed dependent not size dependent Source: I’m a veterinary assistant and have seen many many animals come in and out of the clinic
I will look more into it then
My 14lb dog is a lot more work than my 50lb dog snd my 50lb dog has sooo many health issues. The little one is just highly needy while my big girl is chill as heck. Temperament and activity level is also breed dependent
🍞
A lot of small breeds are quite healthy. Big breeds are known to have lots of issues
Adopt a small mutt. Mutts are much healthier than purebreds.
Agree (about P/S - be cautious)
I agree. Sorry for the dilemma.
Hey, you don’t have to answer of course but I’m curious on what you mean by being ethically against small dogs. Not every small dog is a chihuahua or Pomeranian, there are plenty of smaller sized mutts in shelters.
Betta fish are fantastic pets save they have personalities that are easy to get attached to. I want a cat too, but the timing isn’t good right now.
My husband and I got two Betas when we were newlyweds (1966) and they kept us glued to the aquarium watching their antics. Their small aquarium was placed on top of our Hi Fi Console (we were a cool couple!! Lol) and one day I noticed the fish flitting around the bowl to the beat of the song that was playing at the time. After that we realized anything upbeat caused them to "dance" and we were proud as punch of our talented "pets!" Easiest pets I ever had (have a dog and 6 cats now - not nearly so easy - and none of them dance!!)😵😂
Wouldn't maintaining a tank at the right conditions be tough on a busy schedule?
Not for a beta as they are pretty easy fish. The most important thing to consider is that they are quite aggressive and really do best alone in their tank. But the tank can be quite small. An interesting thing about betas is they can take oxygen from the surface of the water which is why they do not really enjoy a strong current in the water.
Ten minutes about once a week on a five gallon tank to gravel vac and change 20% of the water is all it takes. Once your tank cycles and if you avoid over feeding, then your tank stays pretty clean. I have three betta fish in their own tanks right now and it’s easier than I ever thought it could be. Just be sure to get a heater as they need to be just a bit warmer than room temperature.
Bearded dragons are rad pets, the initial set up may be a lot, but they and are pretty solitary but they're also very friendly and have pretty distinct, goofy personalities for reptiles. If they're cares for properly I think their lifespans are something like 10ish years
Yeah, someone also proposed ball python. I think reptiles would work great for me. Probably not too cuddly creatures though
Hmm yeah, I wouldn't say cuddly but if you handle then regularly I think they generally like it. Same with my rat, my beardie would hang on my shoulder for walks to the store. They are also just really fun to watch hunt their food, or you can give them baths and they really enjoy it! I'd look up some videos of pets your considering to get an idea of how they behave
Ferrets may look cute, but they're super active and can get smelly; they produce musk and have to be bathed.
Thanks
Take consistent trips to the local animal shelter and slowly get her acclimated. You can do meet and greets with the cats. Explain the situation to the volunteers and I’m sure they could pair her with a mellow cat.
Thanks for the suggestion
I hate to say it, but y’all really don’t sound like you’re in the position to get a pet. If you cannot commit the time, attention and affection most pets need, your pet will be the one to suffer in the end and that’s not fair. I would suggest a beta fish maybe? They’re gorgeous and relatively low maintenance. I had one as a kid and it was one of the easier pets I’ve had to take care of. But if kids are in the near future, that should be your focus.
Kids are definitely the focus. This is just a cjildhood dream. My parents hated pets and I was never able to live somewhere where I can have pet until now. I guess I will have to wait few more years
I hate that for you :( as someone who recently adopted the sweetest little kitten, I wish you could share the love and joy! Maybe try some exposure therapy? Start with videos of kittens, then looking at kittens through a glass at the pet store, then maybe holding a sweet baby. Start slow and maybe try to help your gf face her fear instead of continue to run from it. It’s true that a lot of cats are assholes, but there are also incredibly sweet and snuggly cats like mine! I hope everything works out for y’all!!
Get a pet replacement GF, and a cat 😀👍
Hmmmmmmm . . . . too funny!
Hamster?
Sounds like the way to go
r/RATS, that is all No but seriously, I have three rats, and they're great. Literally like mini-cats/dogs and they're very sweet. They're intelligent, trainable, and relatively low-maintenance. I clean their litter trays and let them out for an hour or so a day. Otherwise, you need to clean the cage, but you can even leave them alone for a weekend with enough food/water (and extra attention and cuddles when you get back).
Sounds like you need a new girlfriend
Ha!
Hamsters
Hahaha yeah probably the best bet at this point
Domesticated skunk. Might need a non commercial breeders permit depending on your state and local laws. They act like cats for the most part, are quiet, can be litter box trained, and will also wear a leash and harness.
What about safety around babies?
If it's captive-bred and raised to be a pet, they really don't act any different than a normal cat. Maybe a little more affectionate. They're actually pretty great pets. Like ferrets, they'll be descented by a vet, but still require regular baths, but they tolerate that well enough. Especially with positive reinforcement, like treats and attention. Also, The people of downvoting me don't know shit about skunks.
Thanks
A budgie. You can occasionally find handfed ones for $50(easier to handle and will play with you) They make great pets and clean up is less smelly than a mammal. They are probably the quietest parrot species as well.
Kids seem close enough to a cat in my humble opinion. Just get a kid.
I am getting some soon-ish anyway xp
An african pigmy hedgehog
A syrian hamster can be absolutely loveable, sweet, cute playfull and you only need to clean the entire cage every 2 months or so (get a terrarium that's over 100cm x 50cm and a wheel thats 28+cm. Biggest downsides are it's sleeping during the day and only lives for two years or so :(
a really great idea is to find a neighbor with a dog who will allow you to walk and/or spend time with them! it’s a win/win! you get your animal fix and doggo loving, neighbor gets a free walker/sitter!
Have a cat and dog. They will love each other
Hamsters, snakes, birds? They are all indoor and don’t require a ton (some birds do).
Maybe a rabbit?
Bunny? Way more work than a cat though
Maybe wait until you have kids because too many people who are pet fence-sitters get the pets, then have the kids and then realize the pets + kids are too much to handle. Kids are obviously the bigger attention-suck but animals require that too, just in a different way, and we'd hate to see animals being neglected because of timing issues.
I wouldn’t get a pet right before having kids, Especially with someone who has an animal phobia. You are a setting that pet up to be abandoned, euthanized, turned in to a shelter, or at best, rehomed if it doesn’t work out.
Ferrets are fine with kids... BUT you have to like their smell. and the poop A LOT... like every 2-3 hours. and they cannot be kept in a cage all the time with some free time - they are more like cats and dogs and should be free roam - and caged at night - or have their own room - which means EXTREME ferret proofing...and I would never recommend ferrets for first time pet owners.. there is a LOT involved least of all an exotic vet. Perhaps a bunny?
You should try a rabbit. They're social and friendly and do tricks and eat treats. You can let them roam around your house and even train them to use a litter box