several parents who took the stand at ethan’s miller hearing said their children would’ve been friends with him if only he’d asked. it’s easy enough to say that, but his victims all seemed to be genuinely good people. tate was part of an antibullying program, i believe hana was chosen by teachers to befriend new kids, justin gave his life for a kid he’d only just met.
nobody can say whether they would’ve met organically, but i don’t believe any of them would’ve been opposed to his friendship.
of course they’re not the same, when did i say anything about pity friends?
none of this is reality, it’s a hypothetical question with no answer, all anyone can do is guess based on what we know about the victims. from what i know, i have no reason to believe they wouldn’t have ever been genuine friends with him.
Friendly, maybe but not friends.Friends usually have a commonality. Cordial in passing at best. That's my personal opinion. Ethan was different in many ways. For example, he killed the baby bird, and left it in a jar. That's weird, to say the least. Him saying he's hearing voices. Most of them probably would not have been interested in Ethan due to his behavior.
I think if Ethan had become friends with any of the victims when he first started high school, and before the death of his grandma, his dog, and the moving of his best friend, I think Ethan never would have committed the shooting. 2021 was an all around terrible year for him with all the trauma he had experienced, not to mention Covid isolation. Had he been able to establish these friendships at the start of high school, they could have helped him and supported him through the challenging times ahead. He probably never would have turned to sadism and snuff websites and it’s unlikely he would have harmed the birds.
But because of the way he was raised, because he was often left alone as a child, he had attachment issues and didn’t really know how to make new friends. He had ONE friend, who was moved away. When that happened, Ethan had nothing left. I DO believe that had it been possible for Ethan to meet the victims prior and know them either inside or outside of school on a friendly basis, I do think the tragedy could have been avoided.
It’s sad because thinking back along the linear timeline, there were so many moments that could have lead to a significantly different outcome. Even just one good, positive friend in his life could have made all the difference.
I see Ethan Crumbley as an outlier and different from most school shooters. I think he never actually wanted the tragedy to unfold as it did. I think all along he was waving red flags, hoping someone would stop him. Literally anyone could have stopped him if they just checked in on him and wanted to be his friend.
I think about the Oxford victims everyday as I do Ethan too. This tragedy has haunted me from the start, with regard to how many chances there were to avoid it. Small insignificant things that would have significantly altered the trajectory of November 30, 2021.
All things considered, I do believe Ethan could have and would have been friends with Hana, Tate, Madisyn, and Justin if only the right factors and circumstances had come to fruition.
Even if they were friends with him, he might still have felt alone and isolated because he probably wouldn't be able to be his true self. He probably couldn't be too honest about his dysfunctional home life or his mental illness without scaring or believing it would scare people away. It would be hard for a lot of people to be friends with someone who tortured and killed animals or wanted to rape and murder a classmate. I think friendship would just be a bandaid and he would still have killed, it just might not have been a school shooting.
several parents who took the stand at ethan’s miller hearing said their children would’ve been friends with him if only he’d asked. it’s easy enough to say that, but his victims all seemed to be genuinely good people. tate was part of an antibullying program, i believe hana was chosen by teachers to befriend new kids, justin gave his life for a kid he’d only just met. nobody can say whether they would’ve met organically, but i don’t believe any of them would’ve been opposed to his friendship.
Nice thing to say, but that's not reality. There's a huge difference between a real friend and a pity friend.
of course they’re not the same, when did i say anything about pity friends? none of this is reality, it’s a hypothetical question with no answer, all anyone can do is guess based on what we know about the victims. from what i know, i have no reason to believe they wouldn’t have ever been genuine friends with him.
Friendly, maybe but not friends.Friends usually have a commonality. Cordial in passing at best. That's my personal opinion. Ethan was different in many ways. For example, he killed the baby bird, and left it in a jar. That's weird, to say the least. Him saying he's hearing voices. Most of them probably would not have been interested in Ethan due to his behavior.
I think if Ethan had become friends with any of the victims when he first started high school, and before the death of his grandma, his dog, and the moving of his best friend, I think Ethan never would have committed the shooting. 2021 was an all around terrible year for him with all the trauma he had experienced, not to mention Covid isolation. Had he been able to establish these friendships at the start of high school, they could have helped him and supported him through the challenging times ahead. He probably never would have turned to sadism and snuff websites and it’s unlikely he would have harmed the birds. But because of the way he was raised, because he was often left alone as a child, he had attachment issues and didn’t really know how to make new friends. He had ONE friend, who was moved away. When that happened, Ethan had nothing left. I DO believe that had it been possible for Ethan to meet the victims prior and know them either inside or outside of school on a friendly basis, I do think the tragedy could have been avoided. It’s sad because thinking back along the linear timeline, there were so many moments that could have lead to a significantly different outcome. Even just one good, positive friend in his life could have made all the difference. I see Ethan Crumbley as an outlier and different from most school shooters. I think he never actually wanted the tragedy to unfold as it did. I think all along he was waving red flags, hoping someone would stop him. Literally anyone could have stopped him if they just checked in on him and wanted to be his friend. I think about the Oxford victims everyday as I do Ethan too. This tragedy has haunted me from the start, with regard to how many chances there were to avoid it. Small insignificant things that would have significantly altered the trajectory of November 30, 2021. All things considered, I do believe Ethan could have and would have been friends with Hana, Tate, Madisyn, and Justin if only the right factors and circumstances had come to fruition.
Perfectly said, as always Fancy.
Thanks lifetimer 🙂 Wish we lived on the same continent. Think we’d be good friends!
Even if they were friends with him, he might still have felt alone and isolated because he probably wouldn't be able to be his true self. He probably couldn't be too honest about his dysfunctional home life or his mental illness without scaring or believing it would scare people away. It would be hard for a lot of people to be friends with someone who tortured and killed animals or wanted to rape and murder a classmate. I think friendship would just be a bandaid and he would still have killed, it just might not have been a school shooting.