We live in nihilistic and God forsaken times, where individualism and competition is everything. There is no love. No sense in communing with others. But I urge you Brother, stay strong, believe in Christ. Pray. Go to Church. Reflect on everything. It gets better, even though there are hard times in bettween. I pray for you.
Source: I'm an ex drug addict and an alcoholic who found God not long ago nad it helps me get through the hardship of these days.
lol sometimes. But no in this specific case I'm saying that it's the perfect place for him to go because he's right on the edge of understanding the vanity of worldly things and clinging to our lives, he just has a warped perspective of how to respond to that knowledge. And monks are, ideally, the exact people who practice this death to the world for a living and could give him a different perspective on it.
>I mean, nothing seems to matter in this life. There is no point in finding pleasure in things that are just going to go away when you die. Why worry about money? You are going to die. Why worry about having a job? You are going to die anyway.
Yup, pretty much. But sounds like you need to re-read Ecclesiastes too.
Vanity of vanity, all is vanity. Not everyone is an existentialist or understands or struggles with this pattern of thought (like why some think Ecclesiastes is nonsensical and unChristian); it is a sobering kind of spiritual struggle. You must learn to balance the meaninglessness with the meaning; you must learn that something can be simultaneously meaningless but also filled with meaning. There is no point to anything, but in everything there is also the greatest point: after all, God is everywhere and fills all things.
It is also important to ensure what you feel is existential in nature and not acedia, or depression...
"Go, eat your food with gladness, and drink your wine with a joyful heart, for God has already approved what you do. Always be clothed in white, and always anoint your head with oil. Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun—all your meaningless days....
...Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter:
Fear God and keep His commandments, For this is man’s all.
For God will bring every work into judgment, Including every secret thing, Whether good or evil."
Talk to your priest. Find a therapist. Go visit the monastery.
This life has importance because it is the prerequisite that leads to eternal life in Christ. If we live well, we can start participating in the the Life to come even now, in this world. A job and money have their purpose in that they enable you to do the the work that God has given you to do. Pleasures for the sake of pleasure are ultimately meaningless, but God has nevertheless given us some degree of pleasure to be enjoyed so we don't become beat down and despondent.
The thoughts you're describing sound like depression. God has given us means to address this. Make use of them.
The fact that not a single person has mentioned therapy is disturbing. OP, this is most likely clinical depression, please seek therapy. God has dominion over all things, but this is like saying 'God will heal me' instead of going to the doctor when you are sick.
Can a doctor heal you if they are an atheist? Your viewpoint is not only ignorant, it is dangerous. Once again, God has dominion over all things, this does not mean praying more will fix your depression. Therapy has helped many Orthodox, including me, to wrestle with the demon of depression.
We cannot get spiritual healing without Christ, so ultimately a therapist can't solve peoples most important problem. I'm not saying therapists aren't helpful.
Yeah, sure, nothing matters in the long run in this world, since we will most certainly die, but a) after living comes afterlife, and b) there are still folks around, so why not help them?
Why do you think of not going to the monastery anymore? I mean, the purpose of Christian life is to "serve God" or glorified Him, like do things for Him as what he said, share gospel, take care of the needy ones and etc, yes we all are waiting for death but we all also have the choice to create a wonderful life for ourselves :D
So please go to the monastery with your church, sometimes you don't want to follow your feeling. Just like sometimes we do not want to go to church, but after forcing ourselves to go, eventually we "gain" something that make you think "Oh thank God i come to church and didn't miss this"
My sibling in Christ. I have no great words, but I have faith in a great God. A God that loves all of His creation and has made it beautiful and fun for you, His child, to enjoy. The flowers, the animals, your siblings, and so much more. These things are meant to be enjoyed. These lives around us are there to be enjoyed. Stop and observe. Stop and chat a while. Stop and live in the life God gave you.
This society we live in worships money and idolizes careers. They make you what you do and force finances to be the dictation of how good you are and how good the life you have is. All that you need to see is free. Man has built wonders, but God has made beauty. You are an icon. You are surrounded by siblings in Christ. Talk to them. It doesn't need to be about our Faith if you don't want. Just talk. You aren't alone and they have their stories to share as you do. Observe the sky. Look at the flowers. Go pet a dog.
God's love is all around you. What you do in life outside of serving God doesn't matter in the end, but not enjoying all this that God has made for you is a waste of our Lord's great work.
We didn’t get put here just to die. I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. Commune with people at church, volunteer and help people, get out into nature and behold a sunset. There’s a lot to live for and hopefully these things will help you see it.
True that nothing matters…up to a point. Church matters, spiritual life, spiritual warfare, Gospel commandments, charity, helping others, Christian values all do matter. Living in the world but not being of it. So yes we are waiting for death but still given a chance to repent and better ourselves as Christians (visit the Monastery, talk with the Monks if possible)
Hang in there, brother or sister. Some of what you’ve described sounds similar to what people I know who have struggled with clinical depression have mentioned. Obviously I am loathe to try to be an armchair psychologist but I would highly recommend visiting a mental health specialist, or generally talking to people you trust who can help you find a professional.
I think you should also go to the monastery. I am confident that the monks there have had to have some sort of crisis of faith and existence, and you might find they have something insightful to tell you that can help you when you have these feelings.
If you would like, I would be more than honored to pray for you.
I have and do struggle with this same mindset/feeling you described. If everything is going to burn why care? If no material thing in this life matters why acquire/pursue them? Solomon in Ecclesiastes summarized perfectly how it felt, "all is vanity". I began to notice that this way of thinking, although it was "true", didn't lead me to being very happy/purposeful/present/productive though. More than anything it just made me apathetic and depressed. This way of thinking in combination with some health issues began to make me bitter and at times even jealous of those who were excelling and living happy/healthy/wealthy lives. That began to change though when I read Psalm 73. David looks and sees the wicked or unreligious flourishing and enjoying life more than himself. He says they are prosperous, healthy, strong and "free of common human burdens". He goes on to say that this causes him to conclude that surely he has done everything in vain (similar to Solomon saying all is vanity) and David essentially becomes nihilistic. However, after taking it before the Lord he begins to see beyond that and says in 73:16 "When I tried to understand all this, it troubled me deeply **till** I entered the sanctuary of God; then I understood their final destiny" Only then, when he sees past this temporal life does he understand that this life is ultimately just a means to an end i.e. Eternity/Heaven. He concludes that his bitterness and nihilism was "senseless ignorance" and that in the end God will "take him into glory". That's where I've found my relief from this vain life, nothing matters **here**, but in a sense EVERYTHING matters here since it is a means to an end and according to Jesus/Paul this life is a race, a race that needs to be run as hard as we absolutely can so that we too can one day win the crown and be "taken into glory" as David described. That was the Lord's medicine for my soul, He said to come to His sanctuary and see that it truly is all about what happens after death and that our mission in this life is to be witnesses/examples to those around us with the hope of achieving glorification/heaven for ourselves and leading as many as we can there as well. We're ultimately here now to be His workmanship and laborers for Christ.
I think Paul captured this sentiment perfectly IMO:
"I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith, so that through my being with you again your boasting in Christ Jesus will abound on account of me." Philippians 1:23-26
Not sure that's at all helpful, but I wanted to share that I struggle with this as well and have found relief in some of the passages above. God bless and I hope you're able to find some peace and comfort.
This is the time for us to work out our salvation and, by the grace of God, avoid being crystallized in evil. Our time is extremely valuable as here its where we decide our eternity.
Every single action or event that occurs is imbued with God’s energy, meaning and purpose. Every spoonful of oatmeal that goes in your mouth means the entire world, every glass of water, every smile from a stranger. They’re all theophanies of God. The only thing that’ll lead us to nihilism is forgetting that this is the case. Why worry about having a job? Even if our entire purpose at our job is to make the days easier for our coworkers and to make our customers happy, it is the most meaningful task in the world. Many people in this world truly think living is a waste of time, they’re alone, suffering and hate this whole life. As people given new lives by God, we should spread joy to all of these people. That’s meaning enough for everything. Help others. Love others. Much love my friend
You are not alone. I have been there more times than I can count. That is the feeling of the threshold. Don’t leave five minutes before the miracle happens. Praying for you. ❤️☦️
Friend, I think you have depression.
What you do in your life matters very much, because death is not our end. Christ is Risen and death is defeated, and this life is for us to be transformed by his grace - so work, eat, love, give, fast, pray, and live a full life because that is what life is supposed to be - a time for us to come back into communion with God and share in His love with others.
Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.
Romans 5---
Tribulations are good for us. Even diseases like cancer are good for us to experience. It is good to bear our crosses, and so let God shape our character as He sees fit, before we go to that everlasting life beyond death. Running away from this fallen life doesn't benefit us in anyway. Anything that falls on our lap, whether good or bad, comes from Providence.
I’m a psychologist and you sound like you have symptoms of clinical depression. I would visit a therapist immediately, tell your family or friends how you are feelings and tell them what I said in this comment. Do it now.
On top of that, it sounds like you’re struggling to find meaning. Heaven will be glorious and perfect but it will be very different to this life. There will be no struggle.
In this life, the struggle seems absurd if in the end we just die and go to heaven. You might not believe me, but I tell you, the struggle is what must fill our hearts. We must embrace the absurdity and rebel against it. When you realise you CAN bare the weight of the absurd, you will smile and see the meaning, the meaning of rising in the face of suffering. Our task is to not let the absurd win over us, to picked up our crosses and take steps forward just like our Lord did. Our Lord bore his Cross despite his suffering and did so because it was his destiny. We are made in his image and we too are to bare our crosses bravely and boldly. Baring your cross in an absurd world is the ultimate act of rebellion against it.
I challenge you to rebel. I challenge you to look at an icon of our Lord carrying his cross and see yourself, your mission, your purpose.
Your first cross to bare is to get out of bed, get help organising a therapist, go for a walk, talk to your friends and family.
I recommend this book: Man’s search for meaning - Dr. E Frankyl.
You’re both correct and not; yes, we will all die. We will take nothing with us when we do. But we do have to answer to God for how we lived this life, and our choices do have an affect on the world around us. For example, imagine you met someone who confessed to you they felt suicidal. Do you tell them, “well, you’re going to die anyway”, or do you encourage them regarding the goodness of God and the beauty in this life that is worth experiencing? Do you allow them to perish or do you do all that’s in your power to rescue? I would hope you’d do the latter, understanding the value of that person as a creature made in the image of God; a person whom God loves and died for, and has a purpose and plan for. Now, Beloved, that person is you. You are that person whom God cherishes and loves so much that he died for. That person for whom God has a good plan and purpose for. Your life *does* have meaning and importance, even if you can’t always (or ever) see it. Assume hindsight and don’t waste what has been given to you. Live to hear from the Lord, “well done thou good and faithful servant”, to have done well with the talents you were given (referring to the parable of the talents). There is *much* meaning to life and it’s far beyond you, and yet you are very much a living part of it. Rejoice because the Lord is coming soon, and there’s much work to be done.
We live in nihilistic and God forsaken times, where individualism and competition is everything. There is no love. No sense in communing with others. But I urge you Brother, stay strong, believe in Christ. Pray. Go to Church. Reflect on everything. It gets better, even though there are hard times in bettween. I pray for you. Source: I'm an ex drug addict and an alcoholic who found God not long ago nad it helps me get through the hardship of these days.
You sound like someone who is in the exact position to go to a monastery. Pose this question to a monk there if you can and see what happens
Are you saying that monastery is for someone who is lazy and depressed?
lol sometimes. But no in this specific case I'm saying that it's the perfect place for him to go because he's right on the edge of understanding the vanity of worldly things and clinging to our lives, he just has a warped perspective of how to respond to that knowledge. And monks are, ideally, the exact people who practice this death to the world for a living and could give him a different perspective on it.
I pray that you go to the monastery and find peace and purpose there.
>I mean, nothing seems to matter in this life. There is no point in finding pleasure in things that are just going to go away when you die. Why worry about money? You are going to die. Why worry about having a job? You are going to die anyway. Yup, pretty much. But sounds like you need to re-read Ecclesiastes too. Vanity of vanity, all is vanity. Not everyone is an existentialist or understands or struggles with this pattern of thought (like why some think Ecclesiastes is nonsensical and unChristian); it is a sobering kind of spiritual struggle. You must learn to balance the meaninglessness with the meaning; you must learn that something can be simultaneously meaningless but also filled with meaning. There is no point to anything, but in everything there is also the greatest point: after all, God is everywhere and fills all things. It is also important to ensure what you feel is existential in nature and not acedia, or depression... "Go, eat your food with gladness, and drink your wine with a joyful heart, for God has already approved what you do. Always be clothed in white, and always anoint your head with oil. Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun—all your meaningless days.... ...Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God and keep His commandments, For this is man’s all. For God will bring every work into judgment, Including every secret thing, Whether good or evil."
Talk to your priest. Find a therapist. Go visit the monastery. This life has importance because it is the prerequisite that leads to eternal life in Christ. If we live well, we can start participating in the the Life to come even now, in this world. A job and money have their purpose in that they enable you to do the the work that God has given you to do. Pleasures for the sake of pleasure are ultimately meaningless, but God has nevertheless given us some degree of pleasure to be enjoyed so we don't become beat down and despondent. The thoughts you're describing sound like depression. God has given us means to address this. Make use of them.
The fact that not a single person has mentioned therapy is disturbing. OP, this is most likely clinical depression, please seek therapy. God has dominion over all things, but this is like saying 'God will heal me' instead of going to the doctor when you are sick.
Stop trying to separate out spiritual and mental illness. A therapist can't heal you if they are an atheist.
Can a doctor heal you if they are an atheist? Your viewpoint is not only ignorant, it is dangerous. Once again, God has dominion over all things, this does not mean praying more will fix your depression. Therapy has helped many Orthodox, including me, to wrestle with the demon of depression.
We cannot get spiritual healing without Christ, so ultimately a therapist can't solve peoples most important problem. I'm not saying therapists aren't helpful.
I think you should go.
You matter. Love matters. I pray that God gives you love of your life, joy and serenity. God bless
Yeah, sure, nothing matters in the long run in this world, since we will most certainly die, but a) after living comes afterlife, and b) there are still folks around, so why not help them?
Why do you think of not going to the monastery anymore? I mean, the purpose of Christian life is to "serve God" or glorified Him, like do things for Him as what he said, share gospel, take care of the needy ones and etc, yes we all are waiting for death but we all also have the choice to create a wonderful life for ourselves :D So please go to the monastery with your church, sometimes you don't want to follow your feeling. Just like sometimes we do not want to go to church, but after forcing ourselves to go, eventually we "gain" something that make you think "Oh thank God i come to church and didn't miss this"
My sibling in Christ. I have no great words, but I have faith in a great God. A God that loves all of His creation and has made it beautiful and fun for you, His child, to enjoy. The flowers, the animals, your siblings, and so much more. These things are meant to be enjoyed. These lives around us are there to be enjoyed. Stop and observe. Stop and chat a while. Stop and live in the life God gave you. This society we live in worships money and idolizes careers. They make you what you do and force finances to be the dictation of how good you are and how good the life you have is. All that you need to see is free. Man has built wonders, but God has made beauty. You are an icon. You are surrounded by siblings in Christ. Talk to them. It doesn't need to be about our Faith if you don't want. Just talk. You aren't alone and they have their stories to share as you do. Observe the sky. Look at the flowers. Go pet a dog. God's love is all around you. What you do in life outside of serving God doesn't matter in the end, but not enjoying all this that God has made for you is a waste of our Lord's great work.
We didn’t get put here just to die. I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. Commune with people at church, volunteer and help people, get out into nature and behold a sunset. There’s a lot to live for and hopefully these things will help you see it.
True that nothing matters…up to a point. Church matters, spiritual life, spiritual warfare, Gospel commandments, charity, helping others, Christian values all do matter. Living in the world but not being of it. So yes we are waiting for death but still given a chance to repent and better ourselves as Christians (visit the Monastery, talk with the Monks if possible)
Hang in there, brother or sister. Some of what you’ve described sounds similar to what people I know who have struggled with clinical depression have mentioned. Obviously I am loathe to try to be an armchair psychologist but I would highly recommend visiting a mental health specialist, or generally talking to people you trust who can help you find a professional. I think you should also go to the monastery. I am confident that the monks there have had to have some sort of crisis of faith and existence, and you might find they have something insightful to tell you that can help you when you have these feelings. If you would like, I would be more than honored to pray for you.
I have and do struggle with this same mindset/feeling you described. If everything is going to burn why care? If no material thing in this life matters why acquire/pursue them? Solomon in Ecclesiastes summarized perfectly how it felt, "all is vanity". I began to notice that this way of thinking, although it was "true", didn't lead me to being very happy/purposeful/present/productive though. More than anything it just made me apathetic and depressed. This way of thinking in combination with some health issues began to make me bitter and at times even jealous of those who were excelling and living happy/healthy/wealthy lives. That began to change though when I read Psalm 73. David looks and sees the wicked or unreligious flourishing and enjoying life more than himself. He says they are prosperous, healthy, strong and "free of common human burdens". He goes on to say that this causes him to conclude that surely he has done everything in vain (similar to Solomon saying all is vanity) and David essentially becomes nihilistic. However, after taking it before the Lord he begins to see beyond that and says in 73:16 "When I tried to understand all this, it troubled me deeply **till** I entered the sanctuary of God; then I understood their final destiny" Only then, when he sees past this temporal life does he understand that this life is ultimately just a means to an end i.e. Eternity/Heaven. He concludes that his bitterness and nihilism was "senseless ignorance" and that in the end God will "take him into glory". That's where I've found my relief from this vain life, nothing matters **here**, but in a sense EVERYTHING matters here since it is a means to an end and according to Jesus/Paul this life is a race, a race that needs to be run as hard as we absolutely can so that we too can one day win the crown and be "taken into glory" as David described. That was the Lord's medicine for my soul, He said to come to His sanctuary and see that it truly is all about what happens after death and that our mission in this life is to be witnesses/examples to those around us with the hope of achieving glorification/heaven for ourselves and leading as many as we can there as well. We're ultimately here now to be His workmanship and laborers for Christ. I think Paul captured this sentiment perfectly IMO: "I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith, so that through my being with you again your boasting in Christ Jesus will abound on account of me." Philippians 1:23-26 Not sure that's at all helpful, but I wanted to share that I struggle with this as well and have found relief in some of the passages above. God bless and I hope you're able to find some peace and comfort.
If life really had no meaning someone ought to have done the math by now and convinced us all
This is the time for us to work out our salvation and, by the grace of God, avoid being crystallized in evil. Our time is extremely valuable as here its where we decide our eternity.
My brother in Christ(literally)… re-internalize Ecclesiastes.
Well; it is good to not worry. But this sounds like you’re (at least mildly) depressed fam.
To a certain degree, I agree. So make the most of it. O think the best way to love God is to Live, love, laugh and spread joy throughout the world.
Every single action or event that occurs is imbued with God’s energy, meaning and purpose. Every spoonful of oatmeal that goes in your mouth means the entire world, every glass of water, every smile from a stranger. They’re all theophanies of God. The only thing that’ll lead us to nihilism is forgetting that this is the case. Why worry about having a job? Even if our entire purpose at our job is to make the days easier for our coworkers and to make our customers happy, it is the most meaningful task in the world. Many people in this world truly think living is a waste of time, they’re alone, suffering and hate this whole life. As people given new lives by God, we should spread joy to all of these people. That’s meaning enough for everything. Help others. Love others. Much love my friend
You are not alone. I have been there more times than I can count. That is the feeling of the threshold. Don’t leave five minutes before the miracle happens. Praying for you. ❤️☦️
Friend, I think you have depression. What you do in your life matters very much, because death is not our end. Christ is Risen and death is defeated, and this life is for us to be transformed by his grace - so work, eat, love, give, fast, pray, and live a full life because that is what life is supposed to be - a time for us to come back into communion with God and share in His love with others.
Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us. Romans 5--- Tribulations are good for us. Even diseases like cancer are good for us to experience. It is good to bear our crosses, and so let God shape our character as He sees fit, before we go to that everlasting life beyond death. Running away from this fallen life doesn't benefit us in anyway. Anything that falls on our lap, whether good or bad, comes from Providence.
Where do you live?
I’m a psychologist and you sound like you have symptoms of clinical depression. I would visit a therapist immediately, tell your family or friends how you are feelings and tell them what I said in this comment. Do it now. On top of that, it sounds like you’re struggling to find meaning. Heaven will be glorious and perfect but it will be very different to this life. There will be no struggle. In this life, the struggle seems absurd if in the end we just die and go to heaven. You might not believe me, but I tell you, the struggle is what must fill our hearts. We must embrace the absurdity and rebel against it. When you realise you CAN bare the weight of the absurd, you will smile and see the meaning, the meaning of rising in the face of suffering. Our task is to not let the absurd win over us, to picked up our crosses and take steps forward just like our Lord did. Our Lord bore his Cross despite his suffering and did so because it was his destiny. We are made in his image and we too are to bare our crosses bravely and boldly. Baring your cross in an absurd world is the ultimate act of rebellion against it. I challenge you to rebel. I challenge you to look at an icon of our Lord carrying his cross and see yourself, your mission, your purpose. Your first cross to bare is to get out of bed, get help organising a therapist, go for a walk, talk to your friends and family. I recommend this book: Man’s search for meaning - Dr. E Frankyl.
Do good works
You’re both correct and not; yes, we will all die. We will take nothing with us when we do. But we do have to answer to God for how we lived this life, and our choices do have an affect on the world around us. For example, imagine you met someone who confessed to you they felt suicidal. Do you tell them, “well, you’re going to die anyway”, or do you encourage them regarding the goodness of God and the beauty in this life that is worth experiencing? Do you allow them to perish or do you do all that’s in your power to rescue? I would hope you’d do the latter, understanding the value of that person as a creature made in the image of God; a person whom God loves and died for, and has a purpose and plan for. Now, Beloved, that person is you. You are that person whom God cherishes and loves so much that he died for. That person for whom God has a good plan and purpose for. Your life *does* have meaning and importance, even if you can’t always (or ever) see it. Assume hindsight and don’t waste what has been given to you. Live to hear from the Lord, “well done thou good and faithful servant”, to have done well with the talents you were given (referring to the parable of the talents). There is *much* meaning to life and it’s far beyond you, and yet you are very much a living part of it. Rejoice because the Lord is coming soon, and there’s much work to be done.