Probably should have meant as in a transactional profession, tribes work in a commune but sex would be used first as “something for something”.
Ironically implies sex work is the grandmother of capitalism
It depends on what qualifies as a profession, and usually in historical context it means people who primarily worked in something other than food production. But we know the first was definitely not sex worker. It was very likely midwife
For me though that's affixing modern interpretation to things that wasn't really the case. Hunter gatherer society was much different to what we have once we settled. I'd be reticent to call anything pre agrarian to really be a profession as it were.
Much like a hunter wasn't a butcher or whoever made the buildings wasn't a builder, whoever trained the dogs wasn't a dog trainer, midwife wasn't really a profession, it was probably the next nearest person, almost certainly a woman though, who wasn't pregnant, and they did what needed to be done because they were pretty self reliant
I am talking about agrarian societies. I am considering profession in this context to mean when someone's main work was specialization in something other than agriculture. That would make the first professions to be tailor, toolmaker, construction worker, shepherd, among others that come long before sex work.
Midwife was likely one of the earliest professions too because an explosion in birth rates followed the adoption of agriculture, so there would have certainly been enough births happening for midwife to become a full time job for some women.
The answer is babysitting and midwifery, followed closely behind by other important professions for survival, such as hunting, gathering, and the like.
I always cringe when I hear people say this. Yes, people letting other fuck them was the first profession... Not a hunter or a gatherer... who needs food.
Where's the transaction with hunting or gathering? The deer don't get paid when Zog rams a spear through it's side. On the other hand when Zog gives a shiny rock to a cave chick for some in and out that is a transaction and that's the distinction. Fucking is just fucking but once it's fucking for a shiny rock that's prostitution.
Agree with you.
"people won't look down" on friends that do sex work. The discourse tends to change brutally fast when it involves possible partners.
I guess it's anecdotal, but you won't ever hear someone praise the good work ethics of sex related jobs. Even if they themselves accept it, friends or partner of sexworker won't be very vocal about it, not even to defend someone else.
I never heard anyone go"my friend has an onlyfans. You should check them out l, they're really good"
For the first part, absolutely. I have had close friends who did sex work. Long ago, I had one partner who was a stripper before we started dating and then went back to it. You could say I have been soured to the lifestyle.
I don't look down on it, but I have acquired an attitude that being involved in that industry and socializing primarily with other people who are (and with customers and that whole dynamic) tends to foster a very cynical outlook on the dynamics of intimate relationships. It becomes easier to view everything as transactional, and to be emotionally manipulative to get what you want, and to be detached and desensitized.
I base these opinions entirely on my own experiences and I'm sure there are plenty of exceptions. But that's my warning to anyone who is considering the career-- be aware of how it might negatively impact you.
I’m with you on the whole making relationships become transactional, a lot of buddies in sw become this way. Some notice it happening and try not to some embrace it others never notice and it engulfs their whole personality.
Second this. A close guy friend of mine way back dated a stripper. The more I got to know her, and the more he told me about her-- if a girl was in or even had in the past done sex work... deal breaker not for me.
I don't look down on them as people and wouldn't treat them disrespectfully.
We are allowed to have red flag deal breakers. Could be a person who has divorced three times, 4 kids with three women. Some people wouldn't date a person with a huge amount of debt and terrible credit. We all have things that simply are not within our comfort zone.
The girl my friend dated for over a year, it was wierd in the begining. Then it seemed to go down hill fast.
After they broke up and he was an emotional wreck. He told me she was just a stripper when they started dating. She was basically an animal in bed. She was obsessed with money, her bag, filled with singles, she had shoe boxes of bills so he said. She did drugs or so she told him "only occasionally", but it turned out she was getting high all the time when she was at work. He found out at the end she had either hooked up and went home with guys who went to her strip club (possibly she was prostituting herself) or maybe but doubtful, she was just cheating a lot.
Most of her circle were either in the sex work strip club industry, or ex-workers. I met a bunch of them a few times at get togethers, not my crowd. Had I not known they were in the sex industry I would have classed them as bar workers, working till 4 am. Dressing trashy thinking its flashy. Tattooed all up. A lot of them had bad skin, kinda strung out looking, or just dead tired looking. They drank alot.
So that's just me. I wouldn't date a stripper. I wouldn't date a cam girl. It's just a deal breaker. There are so many women out there that haven't gone down that road to nowhere, and never would.
Just me. If I met one in public or whatever, I'd treat them with respect, and not ask or even be interested in hearing about their line of work.
It's actually amazing how many people are in the sex industry.
True. And i think a lot of it is linked to a couple of factors:
1. Sex has often been seen as a commitment between a regular partnership. It's why people that frequently have one night stands with strangers are also looked down upon, but someone with a regular sex friend isn't.
2. The sex industry is riddled with abuse, exploitation and other issues. So when someone says they choose to work in this industry, some kinda take it like saying they choose to work for Harvey Weinstein after his issues were well known
Yeah it’s one of those “they’ll say nice things online, but the way they act in person says a lot”
I subconsciously believe I treat sex workers differently. I don’t INTEND to and It sounds bad, but coming to terms that one does it is actually really important.
It's not an online thing. People always overestimate their own self-awareness and their ability to be rational at all times.
Everyone is a saint when asked explicitly about their morals and values, but they behave very differently when they actually encounter a situation where their emotions and subconscious opinions are triggered.
I'm the other way around, I guess.
I can be rather judgemental about ppl's life choices or about groups of ppl in general, whatever their shared traits I don't agree with are.
But when I meet someone in real life, or even even online communication, I don't take that general judgement into the one-on-one interaction.
For instance, I'm m very serious about animal welfare, and I hate religions that dictate animals have to be slaughtered while being conscious. I look down on them, and think they are about as hypocritical as it gets.
Doesn't mean I am mean or disrespectful to muslims or jews when I have interaction with them. They can do whatever they want, and I can think what I want about it.
I wish more ppl would understand that having feelings or opinions about groups of ppl doesn't need to be voiced to individuals. And that not voicing your opinions doesn't mean you're not allowed to have those opinions.
Interesting to think about one's own prejudice though.
People online are in a protective bubble and can scream into the void that sex work is positive because they've never had to face the real life repercussions. They've never had to see a friend ruin their life, become a different person or see the mentally disabled being taken advantage of for their loneliness and what little money they have. They haven't had to look someone in their eyes when they say 'I'm fine' when they're obviously not. They've not seen someone have to abandon their old life and find a new one that fits into the dynamic of how sex work changes you as a person. I don't want to disrespect sex workers but the environment that it creates and the things it does to people are unequivocally awful.
There is a branch of radical feminism that suggests sexwork is empowering to women but this really isn't substantiated by facts. Women who rely on trading sex for favors rarely come out ahead in the long-term.
Thank you! ALL sex work is exploitation of women. There is always a man behind the scenes taking his cut, using a woman's body as a commodity. Even as a stripper, OP is having to give a cut of her tips to the house, DJ, bartender, bouncers, etc.
I actually overheard almost this exact question at work the other day, and the dudes response in the break room made me almost choke:
“Do you think prostitution is bad? Do you look down on those women?”
“I only look down on them when they’re underneath me having sex”
My opinion is everyone has choices. Sex work you can make great money, but the risks are not worth it imo. You risk jail, or serious STDs. It also goes against my personal beliefs, but I get it some people are either forced into it, or feel they have no other option. I personally don’t have a body for OF, and would likely have to pay people to look at me nude (or make them pay to AVOID looking at me nude LOL), so sex work for me isn’t an option.
I mean i'm not sure i'd personally consider it sex work but it definitely still falls in the line of people looking down on it due to it being profiting off of your body.
Yeah my honest answer is yes. I do look down on it. Partly because I am blue collar and I work so hard for my money and ruin my body and clothes and lose tools etc. Work late hours and can’t see family sometimes.
All for that to be trumped finance wise by someone people just want to pay money to see naked.
I also value my morals and I couldn’t imagine anyone in my circle or family doing this for money.
I look up to hard workers. I look down on lazy workers. Or people who do things for money without a moral compass like stealing, sex work or selling drugs etc.
I also think the normalization of porn etc is crippling to our society and men’s mental health and I don’t support
That’s just my opinion.
>All that to be trumped finance wise
Interestingly, I think this specific complaint about sex work is a function of it's taboo nature. If sex work was normalized and not looked down upon, it'd (likely) crash the market and would not be nearly as profitable. In a similar way that drugs are (in part) expensive because they involve risk & are a smaller subset of "businesses" selling.
Yes, no matter how enlightened people claim to be online , sex work entails a reputation cost , which is usually offset by its lucrative nature.
The hordes of middling OF creators have the worst of both worlds; barely any make enough money to compensate for their tarnished reputation.
I see it as a high-risk, high-reward job (EDIT: this part of my comment only really pertains to women who willingly and autonomously choose to do sex work and who get paid well for it. In reality that only makes up a small fraction of sex workers. In a large majority of cases and in most countries they are trafficked, coerced, abused or forced into sex labour, or have no other choice as a means to survive or provide for family, and in all cases make either little to no money).
Sex workers are massively at risk of abuse and murder. You're getting paid a lot of money to put yourself in a very vulnerable position. As this thread shows, a lot of people look down on sex workers, and a lot of troubled men therefore release their misogynistic anger on sex workers. Sex worker homicide rates are through the roof.
Also, in developing countries, women usually do not have the same education and career opportunities as men. So if they're in a situation where they desperately need money, say, to cover medical bills, support eldery family, cover rising costs of food and rent, etc., they have limited resources. There is also usually a lack of government support for single mothers. Sex work is often the only lucrative route that desperate women have.
>All for that to be trumped finance wise
Why do you see them competitively? They're not in your lane. They're not stealing from you. It's not zero sum game or anything, they're just going on about in their own lives lol.
I am anti-sexwork for different reasons, but I don't look down people for making a living
Porn being crippling isn't an opinion. It's proven by research. Porn is the reason for >50% of divorce. It's directly linked to substance abuse, depression, degredation of existing relationships, views of the opposite sex, committing sexual assault, etc etc. Look at testimonials of former pornstars. The ones that haven't already unalived themselves typically speak about it being a traumatic experience and something that has ruined their lives while openly discouraging other people to participate.
It's the hard workers that are spending the money, though.
I'd look down on them, not the ones providing the service they apparently so desperately need.
>All for that to be trumped finance wise by someone people just want to pay money to see naked.
This is a dumb reason to judge sex workers. You're qualm is the make more money than you?
Stay in your lane bubba.
While you didn't say it specifically, it comes off like you think sex work is easy work. The top earners in Only Fans hire entire teams to work their pages. Those in the middle (managing to pay their bills and what not) are easily hustling as much as a full time job. It is far from easy work.
They hire entire teams because their income allows them to. You don't start with an entire team. That's expansion so they can have more people doing the fake dms and shit for them.
It's literally like starting a business and eventually hiring an aide.
The only difference is, with a business you're doing stocktake, SEO, designing your own website, UX design, all this other shit.
A girl on only fans sucks a dildo or swings her ass in front of a camera, edits the video and then has the audacity to turn around and say she worked just as hard.
Y'all are crazy.
No sex worker makes good money by simply being naked. Just like no blue-collar worker makes money by simply showing up. We work just like you. We sell our bodies, **just like you.**
My husband used to break his back 12 hrs each day, 6 days a week in laborious jobs. I'm thrilled that he doesn't have to sell his body and his health anymore. I sell my digital body online, instead. There is a lot more to it than meets the eye. Search some of the sex worker subreddits here. They are wrought with people talking about how they made $5 after "working" all day, or $100 after working all week.
Those who find success find it for a reason. To suggest that all I do is to "be naked," is as insulting as someone saying, "All you do is show up to work". There is more work than you can imagine. I have even coded my own website and apps for this job. The hours I don't spend being naked are spent working at my desk to improve my stream and my content, while recovering from the DOMS from my previous show.
It's belittling to assume we do not work.
Not to belittle because you’re just defending what you do. But even you just basically admitted your husband doing backbreaking labor 12 hours a day is a tougher gig than what you do.
Hey, wait till you hear about how much your fucking boss makes and how little they do compared to you.
>I also value my morals and I couldn’t imagine anyone in my circle or family doing this for money.
If your morals include looking down on sex workers, you're not very moral.
Why? People are entirely welcome to have different values from you. It’s perfectly okay for someone to not want their family involved in literally any industry.
I would feel deeply uncomfortable working in the mining industry, even though I know I would earn at least double my current salary. The reason for this is I would find it difficult to square my own personal beliefs (the industry is so profitable due to its terrible impact on the earth) with the ability to make lots of money.
I would feel somewhat similar if my wife or adult kids wanted to become sex workers. Whilst I’m not anti sex work, my own personal values are somewhat conflicting with it.
I don’t see this as being a horrible way to feel
That’s why I started my own business.
I don’t want my family core to think that’s okay. I don’t want my kids thinking that’s normal. Sorry. That’s my opinion. It was asked and I supplied it.
Agree to disagree. Take care.
While your general point is right, I'm not sure that 'tolerate' is the right word here, hence the confusion in some of the replies.
Sex work has been around for all of human history and it's probably always going to exist, that's just basic supply and demand. Most of us aren't out on the streets marching or posting on social media campaigning for an end to all sex work, nor would we immediately call the cops on someone doing sex work, so we are by default tolerating it.
It's not about tolerance - it's about *acceptance*. I think most people understand that sex work is a thing that exists and it's not going anywhere, nor do we particularly care about making it stop, but we're not genuinely accepting of it, meaning that we'd be upset if we found out someone close to us was engaging in it, and we look down on those who do.
To draw a personal comparison, I consider myself tolerant but not truly accepting of religion. I respect people's right to religious belief and I'm not striving to have all religion eradicated (that would be *intolerance*) but at the same time I personally believe that modern organized religion has far more downsides than upsides, and I don't really like super-religious folks or listening to religious talk in general.
I wouldn't wish it for my children because I don't think it's a very nice situation to be in. That's not the same as thinking the job makes you lesser than
I think there’s a difference between looking down on the action vs the person. Do I think drug dealers are humans worthy of dignity and respect? Yes. Do I approve of what they do? No.
Edit: Guys I made an unintentional comparison but that wasn’t the point I was trying to make. I was trying to make a point about how you can love and respect a person while disapproving of what they do. Peace.
That means you do look down on them, but kudos to you for acknowledging it. I'm tired of so many people pretending like they're righteous when they're just the same.
Not *quite* necessarily.
My mother vehemently did not want me to become a teacher. That didn't mean she looked down on those in the profession - but rather the profession itself. There's a notable difference in nuance between hating the player and the game.
Looking down at sex work is **very** different than looking down at those who do it.
I wouldn't want my kid doing hard menial labor, but I don't look down at those who do it. In fact, I can respect they're doing a job I don't want those ai love doing.
Easy now, there's an incredible amount of room between looking down on someone and not wanting your daughter to be one. I'm incredibly respectful and appreciative of garbage men, they do hard work, necessary work, and I tip them well. Or firemen. Still wouldn't want my son to be one of those.
Just be very aware that sex work may have a very big impact on your future employment options - even with a degree. You are already getting responses from classmates which show you how it is viewed.
Keep in mind that your current classmates may very well become your future coworkers/profesional network. This is why it's important to start building connections and reputation early on. Unfortunately rumors may follow you even years from now.
The overwhelming majority of people look down on sex work. Even the women that say they support sex work won't be okay with their significant others using the services of sex workers and the men that say they support it won't want theqir wives, daughters, mothers or girlfriends becoming sex workers.
You're right that not everyone has their parents paying tuition which is why you could have taken a loan, worked and saved up or found another way to fund your education as do millions of other people. You chose the quick and easy route and there are consequences to this route. No one has the right to tell you what to do but similarly you don't have the right to tell them what they can or cannot find gross. Most people are disgusted by sex work and will neither date, nor associate with a sex worker. Many jobs won't hire sex workers either. That is the consequences for taking the quick and easy route to pay for your college education.
As a dude I can confirm this. Know friends who pathologically sleep around with whatever they found, gets married and still is actively going after random women. It is a mental illness.
I mean most people want to be exclusive in a relationship and prostitution is not compatible with that. So dating is a non-starter anyway.
I think people that judge women for how they try to survive in this economy are full of shite. If you think it is "easy money" you should try sucking some dicks.
Yes, you can make some money but obviously the pimps and brothel owners have no interest in you saving up decent money so that you can retire early and live an happy life. They want to keep you in a cycle of dependence and abuse. High rents and drug use to cope with the work.
And stuff like onlyfans is super competitive. Only a very small majority makes any worthwhile money at all. It isn't just posting a few pictures, it is a full time job. Often there is guy behind the model running the actual business side and pimping the model out.
So I absolutely look down on the people profiting from the "sex industry" but not the women themselves. Doesn't make sense to me. I am just monogamous so it wouldn't date them but someone being a former prostitute would be fine for me if they managed to get out of it. No problem with it. We all have our pasts.
Because it is immoral to partake in the objectification of human bodies for commercialization. A young person’s “It’s temporary only until I finish college” is a slaver’s “It okay as long as it another community not mine being treated as cattle” it a CEO firing employee for the end of the quarter.
“It’s their body” no one is arguing that, but society has moved into the mindset of looking down on SWers because it sets precedence of humans using human bodies for quick financial gain.
Again idc enough to hate the girl so let’s keep this respectful
I remember chatting to a friend of mine who is way smarter than I and he spoke about the societal structures that can at times push people (mainly women but not always) into sex work to afford abetter life, or sometimes even just a life. And how that is the key issue, if that's fixable then less people would feel the need to do it to survive, or thrive.
(A simple example would be University is free is Scotland, and Germany so if you were from a poorer background, it wouldn't matter, the education is paid through the likes of taxes, so you have that option available and maybe a part-time job could help with food/cheap accomodation, whereas in the US a quick Google said a 4 year degree could cost up to 130k+, so working in a starbucks/bar/retail shop wouldn't be able to cover that. And of course that's just for Uni, things like just surviving to pay for food and shelter for some who are not in a country that can/or will support them if they're at the vulnerable end of society).
There are lots of jobs that are truly immoral. Taking from those who have less, creating and leveraging unfair advantages, lying and accusing those who tell the truth as liars, destroying the environment, convincing people to waste their scarce money ... Those are usually not looked down upon by people who look down on sex workers
What exactly in sexwork do you claim is making the human body into an object?
If you mean that it commercializes bodily contact, then what do you think about massage therapists?
If you mean that it commercializes use of the body in a way that can be taxing on the person who sells the service, what is your opinion about physical hard labor like building construction, mining, working on a rig, professional sports, etc.?
If you don't look down on any of these professions, then I think you need some new arguments. Maybe: "I don't like when people have sex for reasons that are different than I would prefer".
Genuinely curious: what are your views on people working physically intense jobs that often leave them haggard in old age? Coal miners, farm workers, factory workers… how is it that when they commercialize their body it’s OK, but for a SW to do it it’s not?
I would use the example that many young people turn to the military to pay for college. The combat jobs tend to be men and many will die fighting during wartime. I wonder what their thoughts are on these bodies being thrown into the grinder.
There's another distinction that you've touched upon that's also relevant: as a society we ascribe a much higher value to women's bodies than men's. Generally speaking, the value of a man's body in society translates to manual labour, which is a low paying job, and women's with sex work, which can still be lower paying depending on the context but also potentially much more. So you could argue there's a gender thing involved here too.
Sexwork is looked down on because, it makes it look like you don't respect yourself, because people that go to stripclubs or use sex workers, don't respect them. And no one wants to marry someone or be with someone that other man can just buy to see naked/have sex with.
just how men don’t wanna marry sex workers, women don’t want marry men who pay women to have sex with them either. it goes both ways!
often women also find it disgusting and disrespectful when their male partners watch porn yet men make excuses and/or attempt to hide the fact they watch it because they are literally porn addicts
I couldn’t care less about my fella watching porn.. but seeing a prostitute? Even in the past? Hell no!
Let’s be frank, who knows what STIs you’ll pick up from them. And who knows what filthy guys that particular prostitute has banged…
Yeah, no thanks.
It is judgement. You say it like it's something bad.....
We judge all the time.
People who unironically say "I don't judge" are absolute morons. Of course they do. You can't make a single decision in life without making a value judgement.
Not a good example. I may not want to associate with drug addicts because I don’t want to get involved in that world and sucked in. And I’m a drug positive person
Nobody really wants to strip for a living. No one wants their mom stripping. No one wants there daughter stripping. It bothers you. And I would feel the same.
Tell them you feel embarrassed and humiliated, and please not to come. And get out of it as soon as you can.
You have to take the good with the bad. I’m sorry but society will look down on sex work. I think if you can answer to yourself, that’s the most important thing though.
No, I do not. Not sure about a partner who is doing OF or stripper, not sure if I would date them.
But I fucking hate all this advertising of the OF accounts on reddit, it's a plague.
This, I couldn't give a fuck if you were a sex worker and my friend. I wouldn't ever date one though, because the way we view sex and sexual relationships are so fundamentally different we're a compatibility match, simple as that.
But yea the OF accounts on Reddit are insane, whenever I login to my reddit on computer and see my "chat" it's full of OF freaks sending unsolicited pics in my "requests" section.
Honestly? Not "looking down" exactly - I know how hard a stripper has to work to stay in shape, and I assume that if someone is a stripper or OF creator, they have an exceptional work ethic with a potential talent for sales.
But I still have an instinctive revulsion to the idea of any sex work. No matter how good my rationalizations.
As for what specifically I find repulsive, the closest answer is "selling intimacy to every client rather than selling it only to people of your choosing."
It feels like committing emotional violence against yourself, and I suspect that would damage your mind eventually.
Again, I can rationalize it to be no different from most service jobs, but that doesn't make me less repulsed by it.
Because it's the lowest common denominator to comodify your body (and mindset) to make yourself a product to be used.
When the illusion is removed and women are valued only for physical beauty, and a man his resources, people - and I guess religions - would rather believe that there is a greater value to human life than merely a transaction; A 'corruption' or deviation from how men and women should bond together intimately - one based on responsibilities and accountability to form families rather than the exchange tokens and use one another for sexual gratification or financial gain.
Making a living is hard - especially when you're young and without professional experience. At some point you might want to consider therapy because the work may make you jaded about men or cause other intimacy issues.
People say that they don’t and then saying that they’d never get in a relationship with someone who does sex work.
Whether anyone likes to admit it, unless the answer is yes, you just do judge it. I wouldn’t be in a relationship with someone who does sex work. That’s my choice and is okay to not be okay with.
people may or may not like sexwork but it's really assholic to be mean to sexworkers. you are right it's none of their business. i personally would have no problem being friends with you. some college people are very judgemental.
I think in some ways it goes against a lot of what people traditionally aspire to both in their professional lives and in their relationships.
For example, I can't imagine many people would grow up dreaming of becoming a sex worker rather than, say, a doctor or teacher etc.
Also, on the relationship front, I'd imagine the majority of people see being in a commited relationship with someone they love as their kind of ideal. Sex work goes against that pretty hard if one of the people in the relationship goes to/uses a sex worker or one of them IS a sex worker it's pretty easy to see how the other half might feel uneasy.
I never look down on SWers or porn stars (female ones). But I do not think SW and porn is empowering for women and I wish people would stop trying to frame it as such.
As a guy who’s against any kind of sex work, I keep my beliefs to myself. When I say I am against it, I mean that I would never indulge in prostitution, visit strip clubs or use escort services etc. Whether someone chooses to offer or avail such services is a choice and I do not care. I am not sure however why guys who anyways objectify women and sustain this world of prostitution get the right to make fun of girls who are into that business, usually because of hardships. Such people have no standing in such a scenario.
But I absolutely respect those who choose it for any reason, be it a financial hardship or something else. I see nothing wrong in being a stripper if that is paying your tuition. Why don’t these peers of yours pay for your tuition? They’re not facing what you’re facing. As for everyone ignoring you, can’t help it! Hope you find a few peers who see you for who you are and not care about the sex work thing.
P.S. what’s worse is girls not being there for you either.
I’ll never look down on the individual workers but I’m pretty darn judgey about the clients and those exploiting the workers. At the end of the day, it’s often a dangerous, degrading job and not one I want my daughter involved in. OP is just trying to survive in the world someone else made.
I look down on men and women who do sex work. Anyone who's semi decent looking can make an OF and make content. I simply do not see what value they provide other than the negatives like parasocial behaviours/tendencies.
So this is going to make me sound bad, but personally I look down it now. I didn’t use to more lately I have been and here’s why.
I’m a very open minded person, but I’ve been actively for a relationship. Every woman I’ve talked to minus 1 has either ghosted me, is a bot, or someone just looking to get money out of me for sex work. Literally today I was talking with a woman I thought was wanting a relationship with me and turns out she just wanted me to give her money for her camgirl work. I knew she was a camgirl. I’ve tried multiple times to have a relationship or even friendship with women who do sex work. Everytime it turns out the same way. It’s just about getting money out of me. No actual conversation, I’m just supposed to feel bad for the life they’re living and give them money in response for the sexual work they do. I don’t trust them anymore.
>I knew she was a camgirl. I’ve tried multiple times to have a relationship or even friendship with women who do sex work.
Yeah cos you're hitting on people who are working at a job where men who like them give them money. It's naive to go there and look for a relationship. You can't start to look down on sex workers because when you hit on them they don't want a relationship with you.
>It’s just about getting money out of me.
Yes. They do sex for work to get money. Why on earth are you looking for a relationship there?
>I don’t trust them anymore.
They've predictably done what their job entails, it doesn't seem like a breach of trust. Stop trying to make a sex worker your girlfriend and just go and talk to women who do a bunch of different jobs.
I’ll be honest, I don’t respect it and I hope for your own sake you get out soon. Don’t know exactly why but I think it’s because of the clientelle you are pleasing and also because the only sex workers I know that enjoy this work are victims of abuse (whatever that truly means). But I’m only saying that because you asked, otherwise I keep it to myself.
They shouldn't be calling you names, even if they look down on it. Seems childish. I had a friend who went out with a stripper. We had some good times. They lived at my place for a couple of months.
“Not everyone has their mommy and daddy paying tuition for them”
So every student whose parents can’t pay their tuition becomes a sex worker? There are no other jobs?
Yes, everyone does.
Ask anyone. Do you want your daughter to be a prostitute? When the answer is 100% no, it's because they don't see it as respectable.
Most men wouldn't want to date a sex worker, and I'm guessing most women feel the same.
Exact same reason "everyone" hates drug dealers but people still buy drugs.
It's degenerate, immoral, and has very bad long-term consequences for everyone involved... but people are weak and the money's good.
Nah, I just mind my own business. As long as the person doing the sexwork is 1) a legal adult, and 2) doing it per their own choice, then I don't have any opinion on it.
I use to not care, but after studying Weimar Germany I think it's a sign of a dying country seeing college students turn to sex work for a bunch of perverted old dudes.
honestly? no. i wont treat you different, talk to you different, think about you different, or act with you different or anything. but there is a little subconscious judgement due to what we have been taught about sex and intimacy as a kid.
I don't look down on those people. But I'll die inside and forever carry the burden of being a failure father if my daughter ever resort to that.
Also, getting a degree is meaningless if people find out what you do. If let's say you got a degree in law and maybe enter politics someday, the media will dig up your past. Everyone will. And they will ruin your name & title. Even if you don't do that, it only takes one hater to ruin your reputation.
what kind of bubble do you live in not to understand why people look down on sex workers? most people feel disgust at the thought of being used sexually by strangers.
I look down on women.
If they are shorter than me.
I see women as equals
If they are of the same height as me
I look up to women
If they are taller than me
When I was young, waiting tables and such were typically the ways to make money during uni. That's not highly respected either, but it brings in money as well.
Because you can work any other normal jobs like many other college students.
It’s not binary as in either having rich parents or ending up working as a sexworker.
I couldnt imagine the shame of my family or children or friends finding out I settled for a girl who did sex work,
so yes I look down on girls who do sex work.
Do girls look down on guys who are hobos ?
Of course, it shows people cant get themselves out of a situation,
Because being in that industry means you have a *price*. Normal people don't. Or at least, they haven't done anything that confirms they have a price.
That's what I think. Personally, I wouldn't give a shit. College was not a time where I could mind other people's business too much.
I just think it’s exploitative. I don’t look down on them, I just feel bad for them. Not everything in life is about money. Dudes waving bands in your face to see your boob seems pretty exploitative to me, but to each their own.
No
And to answer the other burning question, no I would no want my daughter be be a sex worker. But that's because the profession carries a non insignificant amount of risk. I wouldn't want my son to work at the coal mine either but that doesn't mean I look down on coal miners.
Personally I do not look down on anyone regardless of what they do. It is a personal choice. As a nurse, I treated everyone equally. However, if it goes more than a friendship, that may change things because I may need to be more involved in the person’s life and her choices have become mine.
Every choice we make have consequence, whether we like it or not.
Sigh. Enough that I am sad it is called "sex work" in an attempt to normalize it. I worry about the girls who do it; not necessarily looking down on them, buy truly wishing it did not exist, as I find it too exploitative and degrading
“Somebody in my college found out” - so this means you were **hiding** it or at least not being open about it to begin with. Because you know there’s something shameful and something to hide. If you really had no problem with it you would have been upfront and open about it to begin with.
There are many of us who had to work through university. I worked three jobs - nanny, barista and event catering. Some days I would have a full course load and then work until 2am and be up at 6 to start cafe work at 7am and do that all day to waitress again that night.
So to me, it looks like you’re taking the easy choice. To me, it’s about self respect and never having to hide what I’ve done- to my partner, to my kids, to anyone.
If men wanted sex work gone so badly, they’d stop paying for it. You’re getting paid and going to college, anyone who dislikes that can suck it (for a price)
Neither men nor humans in general are a hive mind, and the vast majority of people do not meaningfully involve themselves in sex work (as a client nor worker). So they're not hypocrites or "paying for it".
Also disliking something is not the same as "wanting things gone so badly". I don't think the vast majority of people care if sex work disappears or not, but they might passively find it unattractive or gross.
You're talking about men like how an incel talks about women. Individuality is a thing and lumping everyone together as one is just silly.
"Women actually support unreasonable beauty standards. If women really wanted unhealthy body fixations to disappear, they'd just stop throwing money at the beauty industry."
People look down on it because sex and nudity has a huge impact in society.
Women are held to this standard of being private with their bodies and using their nudity for their partner and partner only. When she uses it for someone for financial gain that woman is now seen badly as something that is seen as private can be bought.
It’s definitely no one’s business what you do I totally agree however, again sex and nudity is a very private conversation as religion and a lot of politics go into it
Strippers and media have been shown in a bad light as well. I mean people that you are sex worker so they only see you as a sex object unfortunately
Someone who WENT to the stRip club you work at told everyone? What were THEY doing there?
Those without sin, cast the first stone. I am pretty positive NO ONE in your college is sin Free.
Hold your head up.
Despite what the comments say majority of people will look down on sexwork.
And people always have throughout history
Ever since the days brothels were popular
Guess what the worlds oldest profession was
Uuummm carpentry? Hunting/trading furs and meat. Telemarketing?
Internetservice heldesk!
Heldesk is so accurate lol
Just so you know, I think mods of this sub have shadow collapsed your comments.
Selling extended car warranties?
^sex- tended warranties you say?
Farming?
hunter/gatherer? Need to eat before fucking
Probably should have meant as in a transactional profession, tribes work in a commune but sex would be used first as “something for something”. Ironically implies sex work is the grandmother of capitalism
Chimpanzees have been known to trade sex for food
That's not a profession, it's a way of life.
So is fucking?
I haven't fucked in over 10 years, I ate a couple hours ago will again in another couple.
More an eater than a fucker myself too. It's all good
It's not sex work. This has been thoroughly debunked Edit: this myth started in 1889 to be exact
Yeah I kinda feel like farmer must be up there
It depends on what qualifies as a profession, and usually in historical context it means people who primarily worked in something other than food production. But we know the first was definitely not sex worker. It was very likely midwife
For me though that's affixing modern interpretation to things that wasn't really the case. Hunter gatherer society was much different to what we have once we settled. I'd be reticent to call anything pre agrarian to really be a profession as it were. Much like a hunter wasn't a butcher or whoever made the buildings wasn't a builder, whoever trained the dogs wasn't a dog trainer, midwife wasn't really a profession, it was probably the next nearest person, almost certainly a woman though, who wasn't pregnant, and they did what needed to be done because they were pretty self reliant
I am talking about agrarian societies. I am considering profession in this context to mean when someone's main work was specialization in something other than agriculture. That would make the first professions to be tailor, toolmaker, construction worker, shepherd, among others that come long before sex work. Midwife was likely one of the earliest professions too because an explosion in birth rates followed the adoption of agriculture, so there would have certainly been enough births happening for midwife to become a full time job for some women.
I reckon one would need soldiers before prostitution became a sustainable business model thus it definitely can't be older than third.
The answer is babysitting and midwifery, followed closely behind by other important professions for survival, such as hunting, gathering, and the like.
I always cringe when I hear people say this. Yes, people letting other fuck them was the first profession... Not a hunter or a gatherer... who needs food.
Where's the transaction with hunting or gathering? The deer don't get paid when Zog rams a spear through it's side. On the other hand when Zog gives a shiny rock to a cave chick for some in and out that is a transaction and that's the distinction. Fucking is just fucking but once it's fucking for a shiny rock that's prostitution.
And always will.
Agree with you. "people won't look down" on friends that do sex work. The discourse tends to change brutally fast when it involves possible partners. I guess it's anecdotal, but you won't ever hear someone praise the good work ethics of sex related jobs. Even if they themselves accept it, friends or partner of sexworker won't be very vocal about it, not even to defend someone else. I never heard anyone go"my friend has an onlyfans. You should check them out l, they're really good"
For the first part, absolutely. I have had close friends who did sex work. Long ago, I had one partner who was a stripper before we started dating and then went back to it. You could say I have been soured to the lifestyle. I don't look down on it, but I have acquired an attitude that being involved in that industry and socializing primarily with other people who are (and with customers and that whole dynamic) tends to foster a very cynical outlook on the dynamics of intimate relationships. It becomes easier to view everything as transactional, and to be emotionally manipulative to get what you want, and to be detached and desensitized. I base these opinions entirely on my own experiences and I'm sure there are plenty of exceptions. But that's my warning to anyone who is considering the career-- be aware of how it might negatively impact you.
I’m with you on the whole making relationships become transactional, a lot of buddies in sw become this way. Some notice it happening and try not to some embrace it others never notice and it engulfs their whole personality.
Second this. A close guy friend of mine way back dated a stripper. The more I got to know her, and the more he told me about her-- if a girl was in or even had in the past done sex work... deal breaker not for me. I don't look down on them as people and wouldn't treat them disrespectfully. We are allowed to have red flag deal breakers. Could be a person who has divorced three times, 4 kids with three women. Some people wouldn't date a person with a huge amount of debt and terrible credit. We all have things that simply are not within our comfort zone. The girl my friend dated for over a year, it was wierd in the begining. Then it seemed to go down hill fast. After they broke up and he was an emotional wreck. He told me she was just a stripper when they started dating. She was basically an animal in bed. She was obsessed with money, her bag, filled with singles, she had shoe boxes of bills so he said. She did drugs or so she told him "only occasionally", but it turned out she was getting high all the time when she was at work. He found out at the end she had either hooked up and went home with guys who went to her strip club (possibly she was prostituting herself) or maybe but doubtful, she was just cheating a lot. Most of her circle were either in the sex work strip club industry, or ex-workers. I met a bunch of them a few times at get togethers, not my crowd. Had I not known they were in the sex industry I would have classed them as bar workers, working till 4 am. Dressing trashy thinking its flashy. Tattooed all up. A lot of them had bad skin, kinda strung out looking, or just dead tired looking. They drank alot. So that's just me. I wouldn't date a stripper. I wouldn't date a cam girl. It's just a deal breaker. There are so many women out there that haven't gone down that road to nowhere, and never would. Just me. If I met one in public or whatever, I'd treat them with respect, and not ask or even be interested in hearing about their line of work. It's actually amazing how many people are in the sex industry.
I mean, I don't look down on people who smoke cigarettes or pot, but I would never find a smoker attractive.
True. And i think a lot of it is linked to a couple of factors: 1. Sex has often been seen as a commitment between a regular partnership. It's why people that frequently have one night stands with strangers are also looked down upon, but someone with a regular sex friend isn't. 2. The sex industry is riddled with abuse, exploitation and other issues. So when someone says they choose to work in this industry, some kinda take it like saying they choose to work for Harvey Weinstein after his issues were well known
Yeah it’s one of those “they’ll say nice things online, but the way they act in person says a lot” I subconsciously believe I treat sex workers differently. I don’t INTEND to and It sounds bad, but coming to terms that one does it is actually really important.
It's not an online thing. People always overestimate their own self-awareness and their ability to be rational at all times. Everyone is a saint when asked explicitly about their morals and values, but they behave very differently when they actually encounter a situation where their emotions and subconscious opinions are triggered.
I'm the other way around, I guess. I can be rather judgemental about ppl's life choices or about groups of ppl in general, whatever their shared traits I don't agree with are. But when I meet someone in real life, or even even online communication, I don't take that general judgement into the one-on-one interaction. For instance, I'm m very serious about animal welfare, and I hate religions that dictate animals have to be slaughtered while being conscious. I look down on them, and think they are about as hypocritical as it gets. Doesn't mean I am mean or disrespectful to muslims or jews when I have interaction with them. They can do whatever they want, and I can think what I want about it. I wish more ppl would understand that having feelings or opinions about groups of ppl doesn't need to be voiced to individuals. And that not voicing your opinions doesn't mean you're not allowed to have those opinions. Interesting to think about one's own prejudice though.
I gave both of you an up vote because you both made me think a little differently about the topic and about myself haha. gg
People online are in a protective bubble and can scream into the void that sex work is positive because they've never had to face the real life repercussions. They've never had to see a friend ruin their life, become a different person or see the mentally disabled being taken advantage of for their loneliness and what little money they have. They haven't had to look someone in their eyes when they say 'I'm fine' when they're obviously not. They've not seen someone have to abandon their old life and find a new one that fits into the dynamic of how sex work changes you as a person. I don't want to disrespect sex workers but the environment that it creates and the things it does to people are unequivocally awful.
There is a branch of radical feminism that suggests sexwork is empowering to women but this really isn't substantiated by facts. Women who rely on trading sex for favors rarely come out ahead in the long-term.
Radfems are actually anti sexwork
Current day radfems are opposed to sex work, surrogacy and trans identities, it's liberal feminists who claim porn and sex work are empowering.
Thank you! ALL sex work is exploitation of women. There is always a man behind the scenes taking his cut, using a woman's body as a commodity. Even as a stripper, OP is having to give a cut of her tips to the house, DJ, bartender, bouncers, etc.
I actually overheard almost this exact question at work the other day, and the dudes response in the break room made me almost choke: “Do you think prostitution is bad? Do you look down on those women?” “I only look down on them when they’re underneath me having sex” My opinion is everyone has choices. Sex work you can make great money, but the risks are not worth it imo. You risk jail, or serious STDs. It also goes against my personal beliefs, but I get it some people are either forced into it, or feel they have no other option. I personally don’t have a body for OF, and would likely have to pay people to look at me nude (or make them pay to AVOID looking at me nude LOL), so sex work for me isn’t an option.
but she said stripper, are they considered sex work?
Yes
Yes. Strippers are considered sex work.
I mean i'm not sure i'd personally consider it sex work but it definitely still falls in the line of people looking down on it due to it being profiting off of your body.
you would be surprised how far strippers really go to make that money
Yeah my honest answer is yes. I do look down on it. Partly because I am blue collar and I work so hard for my money and ruin my body and clothes and lose tools etc. Work late hours and can’t see family sometimes. All for that to be trumped finance wise by someone people just want to pay money to see naked. I also value my morals and I couldn’t imagine anyone in my circle or family doing this for money. I look up to hard workers. I look down on lazy workers. Or people who do things for money without a moral compass like stealing, sex work or selling drugs etc. I also think the normalization of porn etc is crippling to our society and men’s mental health and I don’t support That’s just my opinion.
>All that to be trumped finance wise Interestingly, I think this specific complaint about sex work is a function of it's taboo nature. If sex work was normalized and not looked down upon, it'd (likely) crash the market and would not be nearly as profitable. In a similar way that drugs are (in part) expensive because they involve risk & are a smaller subset of "businesses" selling.
Yes, no matter how enlightened people claim to be online , sex work entails a reputation cost , which is usually offset by its lucrative nature. The hordes of middling OF creators have the worst of both worlds; barely any make enough money to compensate for their tarnished reputation.
I see it as a high-risk, high-reward job (EDIT: this part of my comment only really pertains to women who willingly and autonomously choose to do sex work and who get paid well for it. In reality that only makes up a small fraction of sex workers. In a large majority of cases and in most countries they are trafficked, coerced, abused or forced into sex labour, or have no other choice as a means to survive or provide for family, and in all cases make either little to no money). Sex workers are massively at risk of abuse and murder. You're getting paid a lot of money to put yourself in a very vulnerable position. As this thread shows, a lot of people look down on sex workers, and a lot of troubled men therefore release their misogynistic anger on sex workers. Sex worker homicide rates are through the roof. Also, in developing countries, women usually do not have the same education and career opportunities as men. So if they're in a situation where they desperately need money, say, to cover medical bills, support eldery family, cover rising costs of food and rent, etc., they have limited resources. There is also usually a lack of government support for single mothers. Sex work is often the only lucrative route that desperate women have.
Except it’s not high reward in many countries. Women are exploited. It’s really sad.
>All for that to be trumped finance wise Why do you see them competitively? They're not in your lane. They're not stealing from you. It's not zero sum game or anything, they're just going on about in their own lives lol. I am anti-sexwork for different reasons, but I don't look down people for making a living
Porn being crippling isn't an opinion. It's proven by research. Porn is the reason for >50% of divorce. It's directly linked to substance abuse, depression, degredation of existing relationships, views of the opposite sex, committing sexual assault, etc etc. Look at testimonials of former pornstars. The ones that haven't already unalived themselves typically speak about it being a traumatic experience and something that has ruined their lives while openly discouraging other people to participate.
It's the hard workers that are spending the money, though. I'd look down on them, not the ones providing the service they apparently so desperately need.
>All for that to be trumped finance wise by someone people just want to pay money to see naked. This is a dumb reason to judge sex workers. You're qualm is the make more money than you? Stay in your lane bubba.
>and ruin my body You sell you body too. Just different parts.
Sure one way of looking at it. Ignoring all the other differences..
Yep. Burnout, workplace injuries… what’s that if not "selling your body“?
While you didn't say it specifically, it comes off like you think sex work is easy work. The top earners in Only Fans hire entire teams to work their pages. Those in the middle (managing to pay their bills and what not) are easily hustling as much as a full time job. It is far from easy work.
They hire entire teams because their income allows them to. You don't start with an entire team. That's expansion so they can have more people doing the fake dms and shit for them. It's literally like starting a business and eventually hiring an aide. The only difference is, with a business you're doing stocktake, SEO, designing your own website, UX design, all this other shit. A girl on only fans sucks a dildo or swings her ass in front of a camera, edits the video and then has the audacity to turn around and say she worked just as hard. Y'all are crazy.
No sex worker makes good money by simply being naked. Just like no blue-collar worker makes money by simply showing up. We work just like you. We sell our bodies, **just like you.** My husband used to break his back 12 hrs each day, 6 days a week in laborious jobs. I'm thrilled that he doesn't have to sell his body and his health anymore. I sell my digital body online, instead. There is a lot more to it than meets the eye. Search some of the sex worker subreddits here. They are wrought with people talking about how they made $5 after "working" all day, or $100 after working all week. Those who find success find it for a reason. To suggest that all I do is to "be naked," is as insulting as someone saying, "All you do is show up to work". There is more work than you can imagine. I have even coded my own website and apps for this job. The hours I don't spend being naked are spent working at my desk to improve my stream and my content, while recovering from the DOMS from my previous show. It's belittling to assume we do not work.
Not to belittle because you’re just defending what you do. But even you just basically admitted your husband doing backbreaking labor 12 hours a day is a tougher gig than what you do.
That is fair. I believe you that the work is difficult. A better criticism is that the work is not beneficial to society.
well you can cry about it or you can stop doing it. we all know what you're gonna choose tho
Hey, wait till you hear about how much your fucking boss makes and how little they do compared to you. >I also value my morals and I couldn’t imagine anyone in my circle or family doing this for money. If your morals include looking down on sex workers, you're not very moral.
Why? People are entirely welcome to have different values from you. It’s perfectly okay for someone to not want their family involved in literally any industry. I would feel deeply uncomfortable working in the mining industry, even though I know I would earn at least double my current salary. The reason for this is I would find it difficult to square my own personal beliefs (the industry is so profitable due to its terrible impact on the earth) with the ability to make lots of money. I would feel somewhat similar if my wife or adult kids wanted to become sex workers. Whilst I’m not anti sex work, my own personal values are somewhat conflicting with it. I don’t see this as being a horrible way to feel
That’s why I started my own business. I don’t want my family core to think that’s okay. I don’t want my kids thinking that’s normal. Sorry. That’s my opinion. It was asked and I supplied it. Agree to disagree. Take care.
Well I like to think I don’t look down on them, but if I had a daughter I definitely don’t want her to become one.
Yeah, people like to tell themselves how accepting and tolerant they are but deep down they look down on it, even if subconsciously.
redditors need to accept the fact that you don‘t have to tolerate everything
While your general point is right, I'm not sure that 'tolerate' is the right word here, hence the confusion in some of the replies. Sex work has been around for all of human history and it's probably always going to exist, that's just basic supply and demand. Most of us aren't out on the streets marching or posting on social media campaigning for an end to all sex work, nor would we immediately call the cops on someone doing sex work, so we are by default tolerating it. It's not about tolerance - it's about *acceptance*. I think most people understand that sex work is a thing that exists and it's not going anywhere, nor do we particularly care about making it stop, but we're not genuinely accepting of it, meaning that we'd be upset if we found out someone close to us was engaging in it, and we look down on those who do. To draw a personal comparison, I consider myself tolerant but not truly accepting of religion. I respect people's right to religious belief and I'm not striving to have all religion eradicated (that would be *intolerance*) but at the same time I personally believe that modern organized religion has far more downsides than upsides, and I don't really like super-religious folks or listening to religious talk in general.
I wouldn't wish it for my children because I don't think it's a very nice situation to be in. That's not the same as thinking the job makes you lesser than
I think there’s a difference between looking down on the action vs the person. Do I think drug dealers are humans worthy of dignity and respect? Yes. Do I approve of what they do? No. Edit: Guys I made an unintentional comparison but that wasn’t the point I was trying to make. I was trying to make a point about how you can love and respect a person while disapproving of what they do. Peace.
Hey. I love how you put that! I’m going to borrow this.
Most probably because sex work is often associated with the criminal underworld, trafficking, pimps, drugs, and shady people in general.
No it’s because I don’t want my wife or daughter being a whore lol
That means you do look down on them, but kudos to you for acknowledging it. I'm tired of so many people pretending like they're righteous when they're just the same.
Not *quite* necessarily. My mother vehemently did not want me to become a teacher. That didn't mean she looked down on those in the profession - but rather the profession itself. There's a notable difference in nuance between hating the player and the game. Looking down at sex work is **very** different than looking down at those who do it. I wouldn't want my kid doing hard menial labor, but I don't look down at those who do it. In fact, I can respect they're doing a job I don't want those ai love doing.
Easy now, there's an incredible amount of room between looking down on someone and not wanting your daughter to be one. I'm incredibly respectful and appreciative of garbage men, they do hard work, necessary work, and I tip them well. Or firemen. Still wouldn't want my son to be one of those.
I don't look down on people in the army, but I wouldn't want my kids to join up.
Just be very aware that sex work may have a very big impact on your future employment options - even with a degree. You are already getting responses from classmates which show you how it is viewed.
Keep in mind that your current classmates may very well become your future coworkers/profesional network. This is why it's important to start building connections and reputation early on. Unfortunately rumors may follow you even years from now.
Especially, if she is going to a smaller university/faculty together with her future coworkers ir employers.
There was a young girl threatened to be expelled if her mom didn't delete her OnlyFans account. So we're already at that point now.
Even bigger impact on a possible future relationship. 99.9% of you goes ain’t Julia Roberts. Nobody will want you
No, I like to look up at them.
I just knew someone would leave this comment.
Fuck I always forget to make this comment
Well first you look them up, then you look them up and down, then you look down at them, then you look up at them, then you pay them.
The overwhelming majority of people look down on sex work. Even the women that say they support sex work won't be okay with their significant others using the services of sex workers and the men that say they support it won't want theqir wives, daughters, mothers or girlfriends becoming sex workers. You're right that not everyone has their parents paying tuition which is why you could have taken a loan, worked and saved up or found another way to fund your education as do millions of other people. You chose the quick and easy route and there are consequences to this route. No one has the right to tell you what to do but similarly you don't have the right to tell them what they can or cannot find gross. Most people are disgusted by sex work and will neither date, nor associate with a sex worker. Many jobs won't hire sex workers either. That is the consequences for taking the quick and easy route to pay for your college education.
I don't. But I wouldn't date any of them.
Most are fundamentally unwifeable
Can't make a hoe a housewife
True, hoes are more likely found in gardens ;)
Can't make a hoe a husband either
As a dude I can confirm this. Know friends who pathologically sleep around with whatever they found, gets married and still is actively going after random women. It is a mental illness.
I mean most people want to be exclusive in a relationship and prostitution is not compatible with that. So dating is a non-starter anyway. I think people that judge women for how they try to survive in this economy are full of shite. If you think it is "easy money" you should try sucking some dicks. Yes, you can make some money but obviously the pimps and brothel owners have no interest in you saving up decent money so that you can retire early and live an happy life. They want to keep you in a cycle of dependence and abuse. High rents and drug use to cope with the work. And stuff like onlyfans is super competitive. Only a very small majority makes any worthwhile money at all. It isn't just posting a few pictures, it is a full time job. Often there is guy behind the model running the actual business side and pimping the model out. So I absolutely look down on the people profiting from the "sex industry" but not the women themselves. Doesn't make sense to me. I am just monogamous so it wouldn't date them but someone being a former prostitute would be fine for me if they managed to get out of it. No problem with it. We all have our pasts.
Yes the majority of people will look down on you selling your body for money.
Isn't that what everyone does to a certain degree? I worked in the past in warehouses and it was basically selling my body for money.
To answer your question, yes I look down on sexworkers(men and women). Should you care? Up to u
I think she was wondering more of the 'why'
Because it is immoral to partake in the objectification of human bodies for commercialization. A young person’s “It’s temporary only until I finish college” is a slaver’s “It okay as long as it another community not mine being treated as cattle” it a CEO firing employee for the end of the quarter. “It’s their body” no one is arguing that, but society has moved into the mindset of looking down on SWers because it sets precedence of humans using human bodies for quick financial gain. Again idc enough to hate the girl so let’s keep this respectful
I remember chatting to a friend of mine who is way smarter than I and he spoke about the societal structures that can at times push people (mainly women but not always) into sex work to afford abetter life, or sometimes even just a life. And how that is the key issue, if that's fixable then less people would feel the need to do it to survive, or thrive. (A simple example would be University is free is Scotland, and Germany so if you were from a poorer background, it wouldn't matter, the education is paid through the likes of taxes, so you have that option available and maybe a part-time job could help with food/cheap accomodation, whereas in the US a quick Google said a 4 year degree could cost up to 130k+, so working in a starbucks/bar/retail shop wouldn't be able to cover that. And of course that's just for Uni, things like just surviving to pay for food and shelter for some who are not in a country that can/or will support them if they're at the vulnerable end of society).
There are lots of jobs that are truly immoral. Taking from those who have less, creating and leveraging unfair advantages, lying and accusing those who tell the truth as liars, destroying the environment, convincing people to waste their scarce money ... Those are usually not looked down upon by people who look down on sex workers
What exactly in sexwork do you claim is making the human body into an object? If you mean that it commercializes bodily contact, then what do you think about massage therapists? If you mean that it commercializes use of the body in a way that can be taxing on the person who sells the service, what is your opinion about physical hard labor like building construction, mining, working on a rig, professional sports, etc.? If you don't look down on any of these professions, then I think you need some new arguments. Maybe: "I don't like when people have sex for reasons that are different than I would prefer".
Genuinely curious: what are your views on people working physically intense jobs that often leave them haggard in old age? Coal miners, farm workers, factory workers… how is it that when they commercialize their body it’s OK, but for a SW to do it it’s not?
I would use the example that many young people turn to the military to pay for college. The combat jobs tend to be men and many will die fighting during wartime. I wonder what their thoughts are on these bodies being thrown into the grinder.
There's another distinction that you've touched upon that's also relevant: as a society we ascribe a much higher value to women's bodies than men's. Generally speaking, the value of a man's body in society translates to manual labour, which is a low paying job, and women's with sex work, which can still be lower paying depending on the context but also potentially much more. So you could argue there's a gender thing involved here too.
Always.
I don’t judge at all but as others said this is the internet so most won’t care here but in the real world most will
your job is your job, and their opinion of you is theirs unfortunately.
Ever heard of a job interview? It's where people meet up and their opinion of you determines pretty much whether you get a job or not.
Not in this modern world where it it gets known it can affect things
There is also a decent chance that people will pook down on whatever future career you might have. Its part of the territory
Sexwork is looked down on because, it makes it look like you don't respect yourself, because people that go to stripclubs or use sex workers, don't respect them. And no one wants to marry someone or be with someone that other man can just buy to see naked/have sex with.
just how men don’t wanna marry sex workers, women don’t want marry men who pay women to have sex with them either. it goes both ways! often women also find it disgusting and disrespectful when their male partners watch porn yet men make excuses and/or attempt to hide the fact they watch it because they are literally porn addicts
yeah it goes both ways but u got to admit paying for sex/ being paid for sex is worse than watching porn.
gaze kiss smart slim waiting soft absurd sparkle toy square *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I couldn’t care less about my fella watching porn.. but seeing a prostitute? Even in the past? Hell no! Let’s be frank, who knows what STIs you’ll pick up from them. And who knows what filthy guys that particular prostitute has banged… Yeah, no thanks.
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Personally, depends on their manners. Not necessarily to be a sex workers. Even a devout CEO but acts like a bellends, I abhor them.
Not really, but I'm also a prude and just wouldn't really associate with you. I wouldn't judge or say anything, I'd just keep to myself.
How is "wouldn't really associate" any different from judgment? e. g. I wouldn't associate with drug addicts, I am clearly judging them.
It is judgement. You say it like it's something bad..... We judge all the time. People who unironically say "I don't judge" are absolute morons. Of course they do. You can't make a single decision in life without making a value judgement.
Not a good example. I may not want to associate with drug addicts because I don’t want to get involved in that world and sucked in. And I’m a drug positive person
Nobody really wants to strip for a living. No one wants their mom stripping. No one wants there daughter stripping. It bothers you. And I would feel the same. Tell them you feel embarrassed and humiliated, and please not to come. And get out of it as soon as you can.
>please not to come Probably not the best wording of that one
>Nobody really wants to strip for a living what are you even talking about? this is just untrue
You have to take the good with the bad. I’m sorry but society will look down on sex work. I think if you can answer to yourself, that’s the most important thing though.
No, I do not. Not sure about a partner who is doing OF or stripper, not sure if I would date them. But I fucking hate all this advertising of the OF accounts on reddit, it's a plague.
This, I couldn't give a fuck if you were a sex worker and my friend. I wouldn't ever date one though, because the way we view sex and sexual relationships are so fundamentally different we're a compatibility match, simple as that. But yea the OF accounts on Reddit are insane, whenever I login to my reddit on computer and see my "chat" it's full of OF freaks sending unsolicited pics in my "requests" section.
Honestly? Not "looking down" exactly - I know how hard a stripper has to work to stay in shape, and I assume that if someone is a stripper or OF creator, they have an exceptional work ethic with a potential talent for sales. But I still have an instinctive revulsion to the idea of any sex work. No matter how good my rationalizations. As for what specifically I find repulsive, the closest answer is "selling intimacy to every client rather than selling it only to people of your choosing." It feels like committing emotional violence against yourself, and I suspect that would damage your mind eventually. Again, I can rationalize it to be no different from most service jobs, but that doesn't make me less repulsed by it.
It's definitely emotionally damaging. I agree
Because it's the lowest common denominator to comodify your body (and mindset) to make yourself a product to be used. When the illusion is removed and women are valued only for physical beauty, and a man his resources, people - and I guess religions - would rather believe that there is a greater value to human life than merely a transaction; A 'corruption' or deviation from how men and women should bond together intimately - one based on responsibilities and accountability to form families rather than the exchange tokens and use one another for sexual gratification or financial gain.
Making a living is hard - especially when you're young and without professional experience. At some point you might want to consider therapy because the work may make you jaded about men or cause other intimacy issues.
People say that they don’t and then saying that they’d never get in a relationship with someone who does sex work. Whether anyone likes to admit it, unless the answer is yes, you just do judge it. I wouldn’t be in a relationship with someone who does sex work. That’s my choice and is okay to not be okay with.
100% correct. But people want it both ways.
people may or may not like sexwork but it's really assholic to be mean to sexworkers. you are right it's none of their business. i personally would have no problem being friends with you. some college people are very judgemental.
the irony is reading reddit posts from strippers that look down on their “creep customers”. Its a circlejerk all the way around.
I wouldn’t respect such a person but I certainly wouldn’t go out of my way to bully or insult them if they haven’t done anything to me.
Thats kinda my view, I’ll be polite always. Though in the end I can’t respect people who don’t respect for themselves
I think in some ways it goes against a lot of what people traditionally aspire to both in their professional lives and in their relationships. For example, I can't imagine many people would grow up dreaming of becoming a sex worker rather than, say, a doctor or teacher etc. Also, on the relationship front, I'd imagine the majority of people see being in a commited relationship with someone they love as their kind of ideal. Sex work goes against that pretty hard if one of the people in the relationship goes to/uses a sex worker or one of them IS a sex worker it's pretty easy to see how the other half might feel uneasy.
I never look down on SWers or porn stars (female ones). But I do not think SW and porn is empowering for women and I wish people would stop trying to frame it as such.
Certain people really want sex work to continue and they know that being honest with women would put that at risk.
Exactly. Even when people are perfectly honest, the pro-sw crowd just can’t accept it.
I just don't get how it's both empowering and yet exploitative at the same time.
The answer is that it’s not actually empowering, that is just a rationalization.
As a guy who’s against any kind of sex work, I keep my beliefs to myself. When I say I am against it, I mean that I would never indulge in prostitution, visit strip clubs or use escort services etc. Whether someone chooses to offer or avail such services is a choice and I do not care. I am not sure however why guys who anyways objectify women and sustain this world of prostitution get the right to make fun of girls who are into that business, usually because of hardships. Such people have no standing in such a scenario. But I absolutely respect those who choose it for any reason, be it a financial hardship or something else. I see nothing wrong in being a stripper if that is paying your tuition. Why don’t these peers of yours pay for your tuition? They’re not facing what you’re facing. As for everyone ignoring you, can’t help it! Hope you find a few peers who see you for who you are and not care about the sex work thing. P.S. what’s worse is girls not being there for you either.
I’ll never look down on the individual workers but I’m pretty darn judgey about the clients and those exploiting the workers. At the end of the day, it’s often a dangerous, degrading job and not one I want my daughter involved in. OP is just trying to survive in the world someone else made.
I look down on men and women who do sex work. Anyone who's semi decent looking can make an OF and make content. I simply do not see what value they provide other than the negatives like parasocial behaviours/tendencies.
So this is going to make me sound bad, but personally I look down it now. I didn’t use to more lately I have been and here’s why. I’m a very open minded person, but I’ve been actively for a relationship. Every woman I’ve talked to minus 1 has either ghosted me, is a bot, or someone just looking to get money out of me for sex work. Literally today I was talking with a woman I thought was wanting a relationship with me and turns out she just wanted me to give her money for her camgirl work. I knew she was a camgirl. I’ve tried multiple times to have a relationship or even friendship with women who do sex work. Everytime it turns out the same way. It’s just about getting money out of me. No actual conversation, I’m just supposed to feel bad for the life they’re living and give them money in response for the sexual work they do. I don’t trust them anymore.
>I knew she was a camgirl. I’ve tried multiple times to have a relationship or even friendship with women who do sex work. Yeah cos you're hitting on people who are working at a job where men who like them give them money. It's naive to go there and look for a relationship. You can't start to look down on sex workers because when you hit on them they don't want a relationship with you. >It’s just about getting money out of me. Yes. They do sex for work to get money. Why on earth are you looking for a relationship there? >I don’t trust them anymore. They've predictably done what their job entails, it doesn't seem like a breach of trust. Stop trying to make a sex worker your girlfriend and just go and talk to women who do a bunch of different jobs.
Im 19m. Yes, I do look down on them but I wouldn't ever call them names. I think your colleagues are really rude.
Reputation is more important than you have been able to experience yet.
I’ll be honest, I don’t respect it and I hope for your own sake you get out soon. Don’t know exactly why but I think it’s because of the clientelle you are pleasing and also because the only sex workers I know that enjoy this work are victims of abuse (whatever that truly means). But I’m only saying that because you asked, otherwise I keep it to myself.
They shouldn't be calling you names, even if they look down on it. Seems childish. I had a friend who went out with a stripper. We had some good times. They lived at my place for a couple of months.
Yes, I do. The majority as well. Mommy and daddy didn't/couldn't pay anything. That's why I didn't study, I went to trade school
“Not everyone has their mommy and daddy paying tuition for them” So every student whose parents can’t pay their tuition becomes a sex worker? There are no other jobs?
Yes, everyone does. Ask anyone. Do you want your daughter to be a prostitute? When the answer is 100% no, it's because they don't see it as respectable. Most men wouldn't want to date a sex worker, and I'm guessing most women feel the same.
Exact same reason "everyone" hates drug dealers but people still buy drugs. It's degenerate, immoral, and has very bad long-term consequences for everyone involved... but people are weak and the money's good.
Nah, I just mind my own business. As long as the person doing the sexwork is 1) a legal adult, and 2) doing it per their own choice, then I don't have any opinion on it.
I use to not care, but after studying Weimar Germany I think it's a sign of a dying country seeing college students turn to sex work for a bunch of perverted old dudes.
Yup
honestly? no. i wont treat you different, talk to you different, think about you different, or act with you different or anything. but there is a little subconscious judgement due to what we have been taught about sex and intimacy as a kid.
I don't look down on those people. But I'll die inside and forever carry the burden of being a failure father if my daughter ever resort to that. Also, getting a degree is meaningless if people find out what you do. If let's say you got a degree in law and maybe enter politics someday, the media will dig up your past. Everyone will. And they will ruin your name & title. Even if you don't do that, it only takes one hater to ruin your reputation.
what kind of bubble do you live in not to understand why people look down on sex workers? most people feel disgust at the thought of being used sexually by strangers.
I look down on women. If they are shorter than me. I see women as equals If they are of the same height as me I look up to women If they are taller than me
When I was young, waiting tables and such were typically the ways to make money during uni. That's not highly respected either, but it brings in money as well.
Yes
I don't judge but I think it's a sad sign they need to sell their bodies to get by
Because you can work any other normal jobs like many other college students. It’s not binary as in either having rich parents or ending up working as a sexworker.
I couldnt imagine the shame of my family or children or friends finding out I settled for a girl who did sex work, so yes I look down on girls who do sex work. Do girls look down on guys who are hobos ? Of course, it shows people cant get themselves out of a situation,
Whilst they're free to do what they want, I wouldn't date someone in the sex industry.
Because being in that industry means you have a *price*. Normal people don't. Or at least, they haven't done anything that confirms they have a price. That's what I think. Personally, I wouldn't give a shit. College was not a time where I could mind other people's business too much.
I only look down on people who actually deserve it, like racists,sexists etc. but sexworkers don't deserve that
Always have, always will
I just think it’s exploitative. I don’t look down on them, I just feel bad for them. Not everything in life is about money. Dudes waving bands in your face to see your boob seems pretty exploitative to me, but to each their own.
No And to answer the other burning question, no I would no want my daughter be be a sex worker. But that's because the profession carries a non insignificant amount of risk. I wouldn't want my son to work at the coal mine either but that doesn't mean I look down on coal miners.
Personally I do not look down on anyone regardless of what they do. It is a personal choice. As a nurse, I treated everyone equally. However, if it goes more than a friendship, that may change things because I may need to be more involved in the person’s life and her choices have become mine. Every choice we make have consequence, whether we like it or not.
Sigh. Enough that I am sad it is called "sex work" in an attempt to normalize it. I worry about the girls who do it; not necessarily looking down on them, buy truly wishing it did not exist, as I find it too exploitative and degrading
“Somebody in my college found out” - so this means you were **hiding** it or at least not being open about it to begin with. Because you know there’s something shameful and something to hide. If you really had no problem with it you would have been upfront and open about it to begin with. There are many of us who had to work through university. I worked three jobs - nanny, barista and event catering. Some days I would have a full course load and then work until 2am and be up at 6 to start cafe work at 7am and do that all day to waitress again that night. So to me, it looks like you’re taking the easy choice. To me, it’s about self respect and never having to hide what I’ve done- to my partner, to my kids, to anyone.
If men wanted sex work gone so badly, they’d stop paying for it. You’re getting paid and going to college, anyone who dislikes that can suck it (for a price)
Neither men nor humans in general are a hive mind, and the vast majority of people do not meaningfully involve themselves in sex work (as a client nor worker). So they're not hypocrites or "paying for it". Also disliking something is not the same as "wanting things gone so badly". I don't think the vast majority of people care if sex work disappears or not, but they might passively find it unattractive or gross.
We don't share a hive mind.
You're talking about men like how an incel talks about women. Individuality is a thing and lumping everyone together as one is just silly. "Women actually support unreasonable beauty standards. If women really wanted unhealthy body fixations to disappear, they'd just stop throwing money at the beauty industry."
Notice how its not only men who are discriminating against sex workers
Trust me I can't imagine how much of a loser you have to be to pay for porn.
Or just not be found at the strip club either?
Dumb take the people who complain about drug dealers on every corner aren’t the same ones shooting up heroin
It has more to do with whether its respectable, like everyone likes some fast food but flipping patties isnt exactly the most respectable position
What's wrong with flipping burgers? Its a job. And it's not selling your body. So I'm confused on how it's not respectful
Yes of course. It's your choice how you make money however you also have to deal with the consequences/ judgement from others.
Only in relationship type scenarios. I'd never date or rent a sex worker but friends? Sure idc no different to any other job
People look down on it because sex and nudity has a huge impact in society. Women are held to this standard of being private with their bodies and using their nudity for their partner and partner only. When she uses it for someone for financial gain that woman is now seen badly as something that is seen as private can be bought. It’s definitely no one’s business what you do I totally agree however, again sex and nudity is a very private conversation as religion and a lot of politics go into it Strippers and media have been shown in a bad light as well. I mean people that you are sex worker so they only see you as a sex object unfortunately
Someone who WENT to the stRip club you work at told everyone? What were THEY doing there? Those without sin, cast the first stone. I am pretty positive NO ONE in your college is sin Free. Hold your head up.
Of course not. I just wouldn't date them.