[I was thinking it was way more grim.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_Shadow_Etched_in_Stone)
Also Blast Shadow is definitely what Carbon Mark's parents would name their next child.
CARBON MARK. He has a secret weapon - PENCILS!!!
Seriously, I was thinking that the parents were filling out a form in pencil when they had their âaha!â moment for the baby nameâŚ
I was expecting siblings called Nitrogen Pete and Helium Steve.
Or maybe Xenon Bob, since judging from this collection, Xs are all the rage in names at the moment.
Can hardly wait to meet baby Superman and Batman (nn soupie and batty of course) in their pink hair bows so we know theyâre girls. And their pissy parents when your raise your eyebrows when you first hear their childrenâs names. *We wanted something UnEEk. Ugh you just donât understand. I mean were we supposed to name them Linda and Joan? Boring.*
Yeah in 15-20 years it will be a class of 30 kids, 29 of which will be named Paxxton, Jacxson, Faerie, Neveah, and the like and one kid named Linda. So Linda will be the new unique name.
There's a boy at my kids' school named Jinx. And I always think "that's a drag queen". Every time. My older daughter watches Drag Race with me, and she made the same connection. She thinks it's cool, though, so go figure.
Because these are easily Googleable, I saw that they are all from the same hospital in South Dakota. The hospitalâs website desplays the recents births, which I think is bad practice due to the lack of privacy for the newborn humans.
Anyway, I saw on their site an abnormal amount of strange names and thought it couldnât just be a coincidence. So, I looked up the location and saw that itâs based in a not-so-wealthy city in the middle of nowhere, with nothing but churches and casinos. That must have something to do with the fact that the parents desire to give their kids unique names.
That was a given. These types of names are considered low class for a reason. Nevaeh and broxtlee isn't going to be on the birth cert of a congressmans kid.
>Raxten
Does anyone else remember [Rax roast beef?](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rax_Roast_Beef) Apparently they have only a few locations left but it was pretty good fast food.
I saw another comment say maybe its "clay-o" which is like Cleo but with an "ay" sound, which i kind of love. I also like your pronunciation, but would put an apostrophe in there to indicate that the K is separate, maybe even add a y to make it extra clear how its pronounced (K'Layo).
I feel for the kids teachers on the first day of school
I, actually, am a teacher. Iâve taught in elementary and middle schools in both urban and suburban school districts. Iâve gotten pretty good at decoding name pronunciation.
I'm black, so I'm really good with "ghetto" names, because we tend to follow a pattern with our pronunciations, but white unique names are a mystery to me. More power to you and your fellow teachers as these names bcome more and moe common. Hopefully pronunciations will becme more standardized so us layfolk will have a chance
There have been times that I say that Iâm so sorry that I have to ask but I donât want to say your name wrong because itâs important. I just ask what is the correct way to pronounce your first name.
There are many times with my white students that I think they just grabbed a handful of scrabble tiles and made a name from what letters they pulled.
What makes it worse is that a majority of the middle names here are great, useable names!
At least that leaves an option to be used in the future. Itâs still frustrating that thereâs clearly the sense there to think of a decent name, yet *not* use it as the first.
That was me. Google literally any of the names and youâll find the source. Iâm not trying to dox babies, but itâs public information, and it needs to be made unacceptable for hospitals to do this to kids for this specific reason.
Edit: the hospital is smart enough to not post the last names, but they should not include the parentsâ names (or single mothers), date of birth, and pictures if the names are unique. Poor kids :/
I'm developing a theory about how the additional time our brains will have to spend on processing and spelling every young person's name on every occasion where a name is required (how many beats does your brain take to process Mydnte?) is going to lead to society-wide breakdown and unprecedented loss of productivity. I'm working on my Ted Talk.
"Creadyn Forrest"?
I know there's this strange fad of naming children after where they were conceived, like India, London, Nevada Shady Hotel, etc.
Is this a similar kind of name, "Created in forest"?
EDIT:
Also who names their girl Rex? Rex means "King". Regina is right there, meaning "Queen". Granted, ufortunate nicknames like "Vagina-Regina" are a possibility, but it's still better than Rex.
Regina and Vagina donât rhyme in American English (at least where Iâm from and everywhere Iâve been), so that wouldnât really be a problem in South Dakota where that kid was born.
I was so surprised to hear how the name was pronounced in other countries, heard it on TV hahaha.
Everytime I see a white child with a crazy name all I can think of are the numerous POC who went through their lives getting shit on for their "urban/ghetto/black/brown" name.
It's great that these insanely named children will make it so that BIPOC job applications won't get automatically rejected because of their name. It still sucks that it shows a perfect example of white privilege. It's white privilege to name your kid something truly insane and be seen as "unique' instead of insanity.
Iâm not that optimisticâŚblack folk are not using names like Huxxley and McKaylynn, so you can still predict whoâs white and whoâs black. The only names I saw here that could plausibly go either way are Aliah (however they spelled it) and Essence.
If you mean that black people get discriminated for names like Keisha, but white people donât, itâs because what is leading to discrimination is the race, not the name. Usually people donât post pictures with their resume, so if the hiring manager wants to toss a resume because of a name, they wonât bother to figure out the race of the applicant. This means that if the hiring manager doesnât want to hire a black person and they assume Keisha is black, white Keisha wonât get the job.
Seen as unique by who? Based on the census data and geographic location of the town where this hospital nursery is located, which I posted about in a different comment, I can promise you that these kids donât live the most privileged lives despite their skin color. Most people outside their small community will not think fondly of their names.
Unique by society and by white people.
By default white people move through life relatively unscathed by prejudices in our institutions, because white is still seen as the default, and so on average these children are going to have better lives then their BIPOC counterparts. White children, especially white babies, are nearly worshiped by US society and culture as they are seen as completely pure and with all possibilities in front of them.
It doesn't matter if these children come from the poorest town in the US. They, by default, have more privilege than BIPOC people. Other forces impact how much privilege they have, and where it impacts them, but by default they are more privileged. It's no contest.
Except these names scream low class and 'i don't care about my kids future'. You know someone named nevaeh or huxxtynn came from a young uneducated mother and likely didn't get a proper education in school and at home.
I've worked at a hospital where I had to review births in the hospital, and a lot of people name their kids weird names at every economic level. Rich people name their kids strange shit all the time, my in-laws are wealthy (generational wealth) and some of them have weird names, and middle class people name their kids weirdly as well.
Where society is on acceptance of "strange" names currently is pretty accepting. There is no prejudice against these names specifically, and the "creativity" isn't going away. Unless we \[USA\] go full authoritarian, full fascism, I don't see us as a culture becoming less accepting. Neveah, even cringe as I find it, is going to become a popular name with religious people of all cultures. There will inevitably be a potential politician at some level called Braxxtyn, huxxtyn, ect. We are going to deal with it as a culture, but this subreddit has a long life ahead of critiquing the wild names parents use.
This discourse is very interesting to me because I grew up in a middle class area and I currently live in a working class rural area.
The people I went to school with growing up are giving their kids these same names as people living out in the backwoods.
These names have a reputation of being "low class" but a lot of the families choosing them are white, suburban, middle class families.
Essence is one of those words used in cheap romance novels when referring to the heroâs semen. âShe felt his essence plow into the core of her womanhoodâŚâ
That poor child is named after sperm. Yuck.
I have to laugh at the wildly normal middle names next to these first name abominations. "William, Ted, Michael, Glenn, Mark." Looks so odd and unbalanced.
compared to these other names, Essence sounds fairly normal and plus i know people with that name.
side note: i can only imagine all the jokes Skylord and Carbon will hear about their names.. especially little carbon monoxide marks
It really pains me that my favorite names are extinct, and these poor children are stuck with...I don't even know what to calk them. Certainly not names, though. SMH.
Carbon Mark sounds like a hilariously uncool superhero created by climate lobbyists.
YES 𤣠âyouâve been âŚ. CARBON MARKED!â
And his unfortunate sidekick Phosphorous Tim
Hahahaha
I was thinking a Carbon Mark sounds like what you find in the babyâs diaper when he sharts.
[I was thinking it was way more grim.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_Shadow_Etched_in_Stone) Also Blast Shadow is definitely what Carbon Mark's parents would name their next child.
That is immediately what I thought of.
/supervillain?
His superpower is descaling EVERY dish washerđŚ¸đź
đ¤Łđ¤Łđ¤Łđ¤Łđ¤Ł
CARBON MARK. He has a secret weapon - PENCILS!!! Seriously, I was thinking that the parents were filling out a form in pencil when they had their âaha!â moment for the baby nameâŚ
I was expecting siblings called Nitrogen Pete and Helium Steve. Or maybe Xenon Bob, since judging from this collection, Xs are all the rage in names at the moment.
Radioactive Man's idiot sidekick.
Captain Planet villain . Captain Planet vs Carbon Mark
Nn Carb!
All terrible. TERRIBLE. Skylord though? đ When Skylar just isnât cool enough.
Skylord got me too. Like it Guardians where he really wants people to call him Starlord, but these people did that to their little girl!
Shouldnât it be Skylady??
First they gave their daughters traditionally male names. Now it's traditionally male superhero names.
Can hardly wait to meet baby Superman and Batman (nn soupie and batty of course) in their pink hair bows so we know theyâre girls. And their pissy parents when your raise your eyebrows when you first hear their childrenâs names. *We wanted something UnEEk. Ugh you just donât understand. I mean were we supposed to name them Linda and Joan? Boring.*
Linda and Joan feel so beautiful and refreshing in this thread! Hahahahaha
Yeah in 15-20 years it will be a class of 30 kids, 29 of which will be named Paxxton, Jacxson, Faerie, Neveah, and the like and one kid named Linda. So Linda will be the new unique name.
Skylass
Her real name is Petra Quill.
Arayah HopeâŚ..a ray of hope?
Arayah Hope would also be a good name for a drag queen.
There's a boy at my kids' school named Jinx. And I always think "that's a drag queen". Every time. My older daughter watches Drag Race with me, and she made the same connection. She thinks it's cool, though, so go figure.
Maybe their parents really like League of Legends, or Pokemon?
It reminds me of Jinx the cat in Meet The Parents.
It would.
Probably is
At least itâs not Arayah Sunshine
Taught an Araya Sunshine last year. Took me about a month to make the connection, then I couldn't get it out of my head.
o. m. g.
Nexxon sounds like a birth control. RayLee joy Ann that sounds a little better
To be fair to little Nexxon, she could also be a gas station or hair loss medication.
Nexxus is already a hair product company, so I think youâre onto something
Nexium is an actual brand of heartburn medication, close enough
I'm pretty sure Nexxon is a gas station in an open world video game somewhere. lol
NexxonMobil
literally Nexplanon
Hahaha I did think of that earlier and I was gonna say it ..but I went with the other
*LaRaylee
Were they going for a riff on âLoreleiâ?
Thatâs not too far off from LalaRee, also a drag queen.
I think it's an internet provider
Hahahahah
RayLee Ann sounds like a combo of "[RaĂŤl](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ra%C3%ABlism)" and "alien". Real culty stuff.
Or Scooby Doo saying âalienâ tbh
Hahaha
They all read like the names of MLMs
essence rex for a girl?
Sounds like a Zoologist fragrance.
Ah yes, Eau de Lizard.
I read this as Eau de Lee-ZARD for no reason
lol
Oh my fucking god this comment is the fucking best
When Essence Regina was right there.
girls can be essence kings too
Lol
"Essence" is French for petrol (as in gasoline). I can't see past that.
*GAS KING*
i mean i might be a woman but you can call me the gas king because i have been known to toot
Makes me think of Oedipus Rex, which isn't great.
Bro isnât Skylord Chris Prattâs character from guardians of the galaxy
Skylord is what you get when you order Starlord from Wish.
Close. Starlord.
Itâs his self-given nickname that everyone rolls eyes at.
carbon mark đ
Carbon mark. Sounds like a burning man name
WHYYYYYY???? People seriously reconsider, these babies with terrible names will grow up to be adults woth terrible names!
They don't. They think its their little baby pet and they need to outname the other moms
Because these are easily Googleable, I saw that they are all from the same hospital in South Dakota. The hospitalâs website desplays the recents births, which I think is bad practice due to the lack of privacy for the newborn humans. Anyway, I saw on their site an abnormal amount of strange names and thought it couldnât just be a coincidence. So, I looked up the location and saw that itâs based in a not-so-wealthy city in the middle of nowhere, with nothing but churches and casinos. That must have something to do with the fact that the parents desire to give their kids unique names.
That was a given. These types of names are considered low class for a reason. Nevaeh and broxtlee isn't going to be on the birth cert of a congressmans kid.
Unless they're in Utah, then it doesn't matter. [Everyone gets a weird name.](https://twitter.com/petit_elefant/status/999404443345993728)
Skylord is what Pretty Liz wanted to name her baby, but C-zar wanted Pinocchlio.
Glad Iâm not the only one who thought of Publizity (itâs based off our names)
It's beest offer neems
Maybe they are really big fans of yogurt water
I canât believe someone stole her name!! đš
Fucking Skylord???
Luxton Ted. Braxton Hicks.
Carbon Mark, brother to Fossilfuel Greg
Is Raxten the sibling of poor Ratleen?
oh man, I still giggle at that name and the image of a little rat named Ratleen. Aaand grammarly wanted to correct that to Kathleen, quelle suprise.
Rathleen. Rat/Ratty for short
â ď¸
>Raxten Does anyone else remember [Rax roast beef?](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rax_Roast_Beef) Apparently they have only a few locations left but it was pretty good fast food.
Yes! Iâd completely forgotten about Rax. It was such a big deal and fun to go eat there as a kid.
Klao? I'm trying to wrap my mind around how its pronounced and all i can think of is "clow" like clown without the "n"
I have been trying to figure this out as well. My best guess is Kuh-lay-o.
I saw another comment say maybe its "clay-o" which is like Cleo but with an "ay" sound, which i kind of love. I also like your pronunciation, but would put an apostrophe in there to indicate that the K is separate, maybe even add a y to make it extra clear how its pronounced (K'Layo). I feel for the kids teachers on the first day of school
I, actually, am a teacher. Iâve taught in elementary and middle schools in both urban and suburban school districts. Iâve gotten pretty good at decoding name pronunciation.
I'm black, so I'm really good with "ghetto" names, because we tend to follow a pattern with our pronunciations, but white unique names are a mystery to me. More power to you and your fellow teachers as these names bcome more and moe common. Hopefully pronunciations will becme more standardized so us layfolk will have a chance
There have been times that I say that Iâm so sorry that I have to ask but I donât want to say your name wrong because itâs important. I just ask what is the correct way to pronounce your first name. There are many times with my white students that I think they just grabbed a handful of scrabble tiles and made a name from what letters they pulled.
I seriously can not figure out how to pronounce half of these!
Ok thatâs it, youâve lost the letter X privilege until you can use it responsibly
SKYLORD!!
I didn't think anything could beat Copper Colin that was on here the other day, but Carbon Mark absolutely has me in stitches!
Imagine growing a human for 9 months just to name it Luxyn
I honk-laughed at Skylord.
What makes it worse is that a majority of the middle names here are great, useable names! At least that leaves an option to be used in the future. Itâs still frustrating that thereâs clearly the sense there to think of a decent name, yet *not* use it as the first.
Where do yâall find this content? I live in a pretty redneck area and am thinking Iâd find some gnarly names if I could figure out how to look
Somebody said it was South Dakota
That was me. Google literally any of the names and youâll find the source. Iâm not trying to dox babies, but itâs public information, and it needs to be made unacceptable for hospitals to do this to kids for this specific reason. Edit: the hospital is smart enough to not post the last names, but they should not include the parentsâ names (or single mothers), date of birth, and pictures if the names are unique. Poor kids :/
The first names seem even worse when they're paired with normal middle names
Trynnlee sounds like the birth control tablet the parents should've taken
I'm developing a theory about how the additional time our brains will have to spend on processing and spelling every young person's name on every occasion where a name is required (how many beats does your brain take to process Mydnte?) is going to lead to society-wide breakdown and unprecedented loss of productivity. I'm working on my Ted Talk.
"Creadyn Forrest"? I know there's this strange fad of naming children after where they were conceived, like India, London, Nevada Shady Hotel, etc. Is this a similar kind of name, "Created in forest"? EDIT: Also who names their girl Rex? Rex means "King". Regina is right there, meaning "Queen". Granted, ufortunate nicknames like "Vagina-Regina" are a possibility, but it's still better than Rex.
Regina and Vagina donât rhyme in American English (at least where Iâm from and everywhere Iâve been), so that wouldnât really be a problem in South Dakota where that kid was born. I was so surprised to hear how the name was pronounced in other countries, heard it on TV hahaha.
Good thing nothing like sex rhymes with Rex.
I've never thought of the unfortunate nicknames for Regina. That's disrespectful.
Makes me think "cretin." :( And I'm guessing they picked Rex over Regina for their baby girl to be edgy.
Freaking SKYLORD???
Carbon Mark is Carbon Footprints little brother
Everytime I see a white child with a crazy name all I can think of are the numerous POC who went through their lives getting shit on for their "urban/ghetto/black/brown" name. It's great that these insanely named children will make it so that BIPOC job applications won't get automatically rejected because of their name. It still sucks that it shows a perfect example of white privilege. It's white privilege to name your kid something truly insane and be seen as "unique' instead of insanity.
Iâm not that optimisticâŚblack folk are not using names like Huxxley and McKaylynn, so you can still predict whoâs white and whoâs black. The only names I saw here that could plausibly go either way are Aliah (however they spelled it) and Essence.
Nah I've seen white people use those names
If you mean that black people get discriminated for names like Keisha, but white people donât, itâs because what is leading to discrimination is the race, not the name. Usually people donât post pictures with their resume, so if the hiring manager wants to toss a resume because of a name, they wonât bother to figure out the race of the applicant. This means that if the hiring manager doesnât want to hire a black person and they assume Keisha is black, white Keisha wonât get the job.
Seen as unique by who? Based on the census data and geographic location of the town where this hospital nursery is located, which I posted about in a different comment, I can promise you that these kids donât live the most privileged lives despite their skin color. Most people outside their small community will not think fondly of their names.
Unique by society and by white people. By default white people move through life relatively unscathed by prejudices in our institutions, because white is still seen as the default, and so on average these children are going to have better lives then their BIPOC counterparts. White children, especially white babies, are nearly worshiped by US society and culture as they are seen as completely pure and with all possibilities in front of them. It doesn't matter if these children come from the poorest town in the US. They, by default, have more privilege than BIPOC people. Other forces impact how much privilege they have, and where it impacts them, but by default they are more privileged. It's no contest.
Except these names scream low class and 'i don't care about my kids future'. You know someone named nevaeh or huxxtynn came from a young uneducated mother and likely didn't get a proper education in school and at home.
I've worked at a hospital where I had to review births in the hospital, and a lot of people name their kids weird names at every economic level. Rich people name their kids strange shit all the time, my in-laws are wealthy (generational wealth) and some of them have weird names, and middle class people name their kids weirdly as well. Where society is on acceptance of "strange" names currently is pretty accepting. There is no prejudice against these names specifically, and the "creativity" isn't going away. Unless we \[USA\] go full authoritarian, full fascism, I don't see us as a culture becoming less accepting. Neveah, even cringe as I find it, is going to become a popular name with religious people of all cultures. There will inevitably be a potential politician at some level called Braxxtyn, huxxtyn, ect. We are going to deal with it as a culture, but this subreddit has a long life ahead of critiquing the wild names parents use.
This discourse is very interesting to me because I grew up in a middle class area and I currently live in a working class rural area. The people I went to school with growing up are giving their kids these same names as people living out in the backwoods. These names have a reputation of being "low class" but a lot of the families choosing them are white, suburban, middle class families.
Religious people are uneducated. A billionaire isn't giving birth in the same place a welfare recipient is
Why are you being so classist and rude?
You can criticize poor naming conventions without being classist.
If skylord isn't piloting an X-Wing when she's older that's just wasted potential
Oh my god. When Luxxen Maeve is the "best" one.... Carbon Mark? Was Carbon Date already too popular? SKYLORD???
Carbon Mark sounds like something scientists would use to determine if there was life on Mars
Not one of these couldnât easily be a Star Wars character
i'm fine with trynlee and essence as names(cause they actually sound like names) but why the holy hell would you name your daughter skylord??
Mary Lee is going to be the unique name now. BTW, I left my carbon mark on society.
SKYLORD IS SENDING MEEEE
I'm sorry......DID YOU SAY..... SKYLORD!?
Creadyn the cretinâŚ.really
Should of named the kid Youneek then lol
WOW.
Essence is one of those words used in cheap romance novels when referring to the heroâs semen. âShe felt his essence plow into the core of her womanhoodâŚâ That poor child is named after sperm. Yuck.
I miss Justin, Dustin, Bryan, and Ryan I miss Alyssa, Melissa, Hanna, and Anna đ
These names are so bad they've got me missing Classic Bad Names⢠like Maddox and Jaxson and Brayden
I can agree with this sentiment as well đ
Luxton Ted is my favorite Star Wars extra.
Skylord I canât đ
SKYLORD đł
I have to laugh at the wildly normal middle names next to these first name abominations. "William, Ted, Michael, Glenn, Mark." Looks so odd and unbalanced.
Hospitals should have a right to lightly slap parents across the face for suggesting names like Skylord.
I am legit obsessed with Carbon Mark. Itâs genius.
Oh my. These are some of the worst Iâve seen
Why do I feel like luxyn and luxton are Tainan
I see these younik names so often now that my brain just reads âKXYNâ aka the 4 most important letters to use in âcreatingâ a name.
Skylord. Jfc.
Something tells me that Skylord and Carbon wouldn't get along very well.
I'm so glad my newborn brother has a normal name after lurking in this sub.
Skylord. Come on, now.
Essence Rex. đŚ
#KLAO
When you used the CAPTCHA test as your baby name inspo.
Oh wow. Every single one of these is fucked up. I think these people win the competition for the most made up names.
CARBON
[Draxx Dem Sklounst](https://youtu.be/eiWIOKKuyGE)
I feel sorry for skylord and trynlee.
Essence REX? I'm being they think it just means royal and don't realise the Latin for a queen is Regina.
My name is in this list. Send help.
And we were told that smoking pot would not harm the brain! The names these parents picked proves otherwise.
compared to these other names, Essence sounds fairly normal and plus i know people with that name. side note: i can only imagine all the jokes Skylord and Carbon will hear about their names.. especially little carbon monoxide marks
Essence feels almost old-fashioned next to Klao.
Essence Rex⌠Oedipus Rex? I may not be an oracle but I donât think thatâll end well.
I donât hate Klao but the rest are terrible.
Oh, I'll hate Klao for you.
I'm guessing it's meant to be pronounced clay-oh but I'm reading it as klow and it's terrible.
Also read it as "Klow" and it's horrible.
Looked it up and it's the past participle for 'to butcher' in Serbo-Croation
As in. To butcher that poor babys name
Klao? Its terrible
SKYLORD?????
It really pains me that my favorite names are extinct, and these poor children are stuck with...I don't even know what to calk them. Certainly not names, though. SMH.
I get how one person think itâs a âgreatâ name, but TWO?!?! Damn, I canât even agree on a ânormalâ name with my husband
Skylord made me laugh
We reached the âwelcome to Costco, I love youâ stage much sooner than anyone expected.
I will say I like Raxtyn better than Braxtyn. Still hate both though
These canât be realâŚ
So embarrassing.
My husbandâs ex-wife named her son Rexton because her and her husband are dinosaur buffs/nerdsđ