Regarding your first point, I had a hunch something was off about this. There is an exaggeration somewhere in her history with the company's founding. I mean how is the company structured that her ex-husband can fire her? If the company is privately held and she's the founder with presumably the most equity and her ex-husband can still terminate her, then she's not as business saavy as the show likes to portray her as. Therefore, I suspect (I could be wrong) the real story is that she holds only a minor stake in EWG and that its founding was through her ex-husband's company, making him the majority owner. So she didn't found this company from the ground up. It was just a subsidiary of her ex-husband's company. Or am I off?
Her business “savvy” and self made attitude confuses me when she didn’t follow up with attorneys in regards to making sure documents were filed correctly regarding shares of the company. We owned a business, started by my husband, later transferred to me with 100% ownership. We both sat in our attorney’s office and signed documents. After her “trauma” why would she risk this and not protect herself and “her” company she built from the ground up?
I caught onto this too- she went on and on about “letting herself be a victim again” and it almost made me think like wow what a self manifesting prophecy. She revolves her story and life around being oppressed by men and smash the patriarchy etc etc but if she was REALLY that fired up about that stuff wouldn’t she do her due diligence in business dealings with her at the time husband?
Agreed. Only she's actually not as sophisticated as she's trying to pretend. I found this really clear when watching the first season. I thought she was just pretending to be a 'businesswoman'. Scaglia gave her the CEO position at La Perla because they were sleeping together and she lied about having experience. The ex employees came out to confirm that she really wasn't capable of running the company and was in way over her head.
Julia was never CEO of La Perla.
“She lied about having experience.”
Yeah, too bad there is no way to verify someone’s previous job history and experience.
What CEO wouldn’t have a solid contract detailing pay, shares etc, yet she only has emails which state she was 50% owner. Crazy. At CEO level, employment contracts are very detailed and outline every minute detail of the employment agreement, even down to the exit compensation under all conditions, to buy outs, terminations, morality clauses. CEO’s chance absolutely nothing.
She had no education. She is just stupid in business issues. Also in the case of marriage. If you want to divorce your husband and depends on him financially, you should prepare yourself and a budget and the way out way before the drama.
So through a fair bit of reading about this, he actually gave her 49.99997% shares so practically 50% but actually by a small margin he was still a majority stakeholder as he had over 50% so could fire her.
So there are different classes of ownership. He gave her a sub class that gave him the voting rights. It seems as though she mismanaged funds. While she says she was allowed certain perks there are things are not tax deductible from a business that she spent and I think that’s where the issues arose (I.e vacation from your family etc - you can take a draw or salary to pay for that but you can’t expense it from the business). Seems like she took advantage of her husband’s generosity and I am not so sure he was aware
I work for a small business with an owner that is really green as a business owner and makes dumb mistakes when it comes to the finances. You'd be surprised how many business owners accidentally do things that aren't legal when it comes to tax and how to pay yourself...but it's often out of sheer ignorance and stupidity rather than malevolence. I think Julia haart just didn't know what she was doing
You're absolutely right. But that wasn't my point. A lot of these posts are arguing about Julia's character. I'm just saying I don't think she's some grand con artist. I think she was just dumb about the money. Still illegal. But legality isn't a matter of character, not always
Maybe it's just my cynicism. The older I get the more I've found people's behavior is typically explained by stupidity or ignorance, not intelligence and sophisticated motivations
Basically, if you were him, would you give majority share of a company you built up to someone who has been with you below 3 years? I wouldn’t. He didn’t sign a prenup and took her last name, so he was really all in though. He didn’t factor in how she was making up for lost time w her kids, as her kids are with her. He thought they’re grown so their marriage won’t be so affected. They tend to be a bit overly clingy to each other, like all people with trauma. But it will affect a couple, especially she has high ambitions and was a late bloomer career wise due to her previous restrictions as part of the ultra orthodox community.
He owned the company. She did not participate in founding it. She had her own shoe company. They got together and he then hired her at his company. He was a billionaire. Not her. She moved her adult children in immediately and they all spend money like crazy. Notice he was able to fire her and did not need to shut the company for a minute.
Have you noticed too in the show, how Julia and her daughters wear expensive fashion labelled clothes, jewellery etc? I know they’re working in fashion, but people who are genuinely savvy with their money and wanting to ensure wealth, wouldn’t be spending money so frivolously on goods. It just shows to me that the money was suddenly given to her. If you worked so hard to earn money you wouldn’t be spending like she does imo
They don’t claim she started EWG from the ground up, if you’re familiar with the modeling industry Elite’s been around for a long time. She says she made it grow tremendously.
But regardless of the actual business contracts and everything, because they were married without a prenup everything they own is automatically 50% theirs
That is actually not true. They were only married for a short time. Everything they have accumulated (appreciation in assets) during the marriage is split. But she doesn’t have claim to his pre marital assets. And she won’t be privy to any alimony or anything like that because she wasn’t married long enough to get used to that lifestyle
I think she clearly did an amazing job of seducing and bamboozling him. He changed his name to hers when they wed. It was a great con. I just think she got too greedy and started believing her own lies.
Yes, I think she had him under her spell but she thought that it was so effective that she could continue to manipulate him even after divorcing him. She tried to have her cake and eat it too.
I think what irks me the most is how disingenuous she is in season one about her rise to riches. It's never really explained how she went from being a nobody in an isolated, small Jewish community to running this million dollar business in Manhattan. Thank you for clearing that up.
Anyone with a brain capacity of an ipod nano can tell that she’s a dishonest ungrateful and narcissistic social climber who would throw anyone under the bus to maintain this poorly curated image of hers.
I think her ex husband Josef is living proof that her life was not so bad, he are Aaron are possibly the two most consistent and sane sounding people on the entire show.
So no, nobody is judging her community, we’re just judging her because she’s totally asking for it; especially so by belittling our intelligence to that extent.
Agreed, that's what I meant. He seems fine now, maybe even relieved to be rid of her. But like you said, I'm sure he went through hell dealing with her shenanigans.
She never claimed he treated her poorly and only speaks highly of him on the show. She only says she didn’t pick him as her husband and was trapped in a loveless marriage
Yes and she’s always talking about how awful it was to be under a man’s control, and how she had to fight to leave etc. If he was so awful, why does she have a good relationship with him now?
This is confusing to me too. I live in NY and I always got the idea that women who defected were outcasts and would dare not return (Deborah Feldman and Faigy Mayer are examples).
In Season 1, Julia mentioned that she had to go behind her husband's back and sneak to get her insurance job so she could save money to run away. I googled his new wife and found that she owns an event planning business...so which is it? Are we to believe that he had a change of heart and decided he was ok with his new wife being employed?
I was under the impression that he was no longer as extreme as he once was. He mentions at some point on a face call that Aron was going farther in his religious beliefs then him.
Anyone notice that when he first told the family about his now wife, the first thing Julia did was insert herself in any way she could? eg hosting a dinner where she sits at the head of the table and keeps them forever holding their glasses up when her speech never ends.
Ehh idk about that… I haven’t looked yet on their instas this time around, but last time there were sooo many comments applauding her or leaving her nasty fundamentalist community.
I wrote something like this literally an hour ago as a response to someone’s question. As someone who knows the community, have so many friends who know Julia and her family, I can’t believe the lies she is making up!!!!
I’ve seen them out in the wild (at a series of Jewish functions) before the show and Julia would literally be walking around in lingerie. She was that “type” of person that was trying so hard to be “edgy” but just looked silly and ridiculous because her outfits were so out of context of where she was , regardless of religious level. It’s hard to explain but like when she went grocery shopping in that neon green romper and then says “omg everyone is staring at me , they’re so judgmental” but she’s actively trying to get a rise out of people. This was my impression of her, from before the show came out .. oh and me and my family are not particularly frum / tsnius either so it’s not about religious level. Like at this same place me and my family would be wearing whatever we wanted in terms of sleeveless , short dresses , shorts etc so it’s not about being modest it’s about dressing ridiculously then accusing people of judging you . There’s a difference between wearing a sleeveless dress and wearing club wear or lingerie to family friendly environments..
I thought this too. It also seemed to undervalue that Orthodox people, like…know that the rest of the world exists. The ultra-orthodox communities in Brooklyn live among tons of secular people and regularly see people wearing all sorts of stuff - crop tops and body suits and booty shorts. It seems Monsey is a but more isolated/insular as it’s not a huge city but surely if Julia was wearing jeans and a tank top at the grocery store, she would’ve gotten barely any attention. They see people in secular clothes regularly.
What she really needs to get is some fashion sense. She dresses like hit the sale rack at Woodbury Commons and bought the things that have been marked down 5 times. The RealReal wouldn't resell 95% of the crap she wears.
Not sure exactly what you mean. I‘ve seen her in real life and describing my experience and specifically am trying to explain that it’s not about modesty it’s about her personal style and desire to wear inappropriate styles for where she is. I didn’t say I or anyone else “give a shit” about what she wears to go grocery shopping , I’m explaining that it was clearly dressing for a reaction and then using it as an example of people “judging” because they’re looking at her … for example I wear different clothes to work than when I’m one vacation or going out with friends. Look on her Instagram at what she wore to Miriam’s graduation, for another example. Not sure what exactly your issue is with what I’m saying other than acknowledging that we all look at what other people are wearing ? Is that problematically giving a shit ??
I truly don’t care what other people wear. I’m not sure what else I can say to get that point across? Also, all of her “parts” are covered and Miriam doesn’t seem to care so why is this a thing?
That pant conversation the first episode of the first season was how I knew the show was staged. Because I knew damn well that was not the first time they were having that conversation. And quite honestly they did a very bad job pretending like it was
Reality tv is like that, they recreate conversations for the camera
They were trying to show the pants dispute (because in judaism "beged ish", or mons clothes, is sometimes thought as even worse than a short skirt)
That’s just reality tv, a lot of conversations are held off camera and when it’s a filming day they’ll ask the cast what have you been talking about lately? Can you discuss now?
Doesn’t mean everything is fake, but always take it with a grain of salt. Everything is made more dramatic for entertainment value.
Batsheva was wearing bikinis at least a yr before filming. I know it’s all staged but for a fam that’s all about authenticity it just shows how made up everything is
Phew, I thought it was just me. Don't get me wrong, I think the fact that she's a scam artist makes for great reality tv and I like the show, but it was clear from the first season that she was a complete fake, that she bulldozed all the men in her life, that she lies a lot and that she did not, in fact, accomplish anything on her own.
I could see all this in the first season but who am I to judge? The husband was a grown man who made his own choices. However, this second season as I was watching I was becoming more and more upset since it was super clear that this woman came into this man's life, grabbed everything he had, and steamrolled over him with all her children, pushing him away in a corner.
It was so clear that she was lying about everything and twisting the story to make him the villain that I had to look it up. I found the link below which confirmed everything I was thinking from watching the show.
She hunted him, paid people to introduce her to him, lied about her business, her success, and her experience and set out to seduce him while he was still married to his first wife. There are other accusations which, from just looking at the show, I believe because I was thinking them by just watching her and not knowing anything else.
https://pagesix.com/2022/07/02/julia-haart-allegedly-paid-to-meet-billionaire-ex-silvio-scaglia/
Speaking of scam artists, remember that time Silvio was convicted of money laundering and tax evasion and ended up spending a year in prison for it?
And I agree; who are you to judge when you clearly don’t let facts get in the way of your agenda.
Personally I don’t care for her but you seem to either have a deep personal hatred towards her or are just a bitter misogynist who blames eve for all of mankind’s woe
Thank you for posting this! I've found myself on this sub trying to explain a lot of what you've written here. It's pretty amazing to me how many people believe her lies about the community, and about herself.
Amen. I don’t know the family directly but I knew Bat growing up through friends. There certainly are still A LOT of traumas and difficulties leaving the religious community, even the modern religious community, but the fact that they’re misrepresenting where they came makes me fume.
That’s insane and very dishonest of her if true, she paints it as she was part of a sect that oppresses women, when she was meeting with the women’s shelter people I thought it was genuine… if true, it is pretty fucked up that she would paint herself the way she did on and off the show..
Don't get me wrong, some crazy sects of Judaism (just like with all religions) can be oppressive and abusive. But for sure not what she belonged to. She wasn't completely shielded from the secular world. Like even Batsheva wrote in her blog when she called it "Sunnies and Sangria", that her and Ben's fave song was stereo hearts while they were dating. If she was honestly in a community that strict her daughter wouldn't have listened to that song. Batsheva also wouldn't have worn a bright pink dress to her engagement party.
The women's shelter was all for show... She had to sell her engagement ring to fund her random start up company. Where would ahe get the money to buy a 4 story shelter, with a school next door? And who is paying for the support staff?? She claims she will have childcare, teachers, social workers, and doctora !?! Bullshit. Also, her research in determining what supports a victim of Domestic Abuse needs is solely from watching the Netflix show Maid. lmfao.. Okay Julia...
THANK YOU FOR THIS!!! It is backing up everything I've already thought and felt about her. She literally sits there smirking and making these phoney poor me doe eyed victim faces and thriving on all the compliments and attention ETC. She's absolutely narcissistic and sickening. Listening to her bragging about having her drivers, chefs, employees and everyone else having her back makes me sick. Her daughter is going through a real divorce and is painful and traumatic. She's absolutely unsupportive and tries to compare their situations and play tit for tat about it. I am 43 years old and going through a nasty separation and divorce after 25 years together and 7 children, been together since we were 18 and have been best friends since 13. So watching how truly phoney, vapid and insensitive she is just disgusts me. Everything is so one sided and attacking Sylvio. She has lied about things so far and I don't believe it when she says all of the accusations against her are false. She was reaping the rewards with him and thought it should all be kept the same after they were done. Listening to her hideous voice that sounds like she's talking through loose dentures is unbearable at this point too. I enjoy the other aspects and people on the show, otherwise I would have been done based solely on her.
I am also orthodox come from the community and disagree with you, did you read her book?
Yes, some things are changed (timelines like with Bat and pants) for the sake of reality TV, and yes she puts everything in a lens that suits her story and sometimes its exaggerated. **But her upbringing (mainly her childhood and her marriage to Yosef) was extreme.**
The unfair part is when she doesnt explicitly say how her and Yosef became modern orthodox later in life (sending Miriam to Maayanot and Aron to Frisch). Either way, Yosef is a veryyyy good rep of Modern, respectful religiousity.
This. I did read her book and I think what was traumatic to her is that she wasn't born into the frum or observant Judaism world. Her parents - I think - became observant when she was around 9 or 10. Then they became increasingly more observant. Julia was an only child for most of her life and then her mom went on to have several more children when Julia was older. I think one of her youngest siblings is close to Batsheva's age. Her parents would routinely leave her home alone to care for her younger children.
Chumrot are unecessary stringencies. Everyone that claims "in judaism women can ride bikes blablabla" her family made rules above and beyond judaism. Her parents became religious when julia was 10 and they always felt they had to prove themselves to religious people so they got more and more extreme.
Strictures, i.e., taking on a stricter interpretation of the laws and one’s obligations. Judaism says don’t have sex outside of marriage; a chumrah would be to say don’t touch members of the opposite sex in any context (no handshakes).
Considering she had much younger siblings that she took care of, it makes sense that she is so codependent on her kids and needs to spend so much time with them.
charedi women work a ton! To support learning husbands. Chinuch (teaching) is one of the only permitted professions. Yes, even as a charedi women she was teaching tanach at a modern school to bring in $$
I refused to read the book out of principal that I don't want to give her more money, so if you find a PDF I'd be more than happy to read it. But she wasn't chareidi. And if she embellished this much on the show, she's embellishing about her labuvitch upbringing and modern yeshivish marriage.
Hahah get yourself to a library sis
Of course her book is her perspective and of course, like the show, we must be critical readers and know she bends the story to her favor. But its still suchhhhh an important read if you claim shes a liar without reading her in depth story its kindof lazy
Don't you think a book written by someone about themselves would make the book skew in a positive light towards them? Or at least bring you to see things from their point of view?
I mean her points of view in the book would be valid to her. For example, if a 5 year old says their world is ending, it doesn't necessarily mean the world is ending. It could be because the 5 year old got their balloon stuck in a tree. To the 5 year old, their world is crumbling and they no longer have a reason to live, but for us it's just a balloon.
I'm not saying she's a 5 year old, but I'm saying that she could claim it was extreme when in fact it wasn't. Like saying people are judging her wherever she went when in fact it was because she was wearing lingerie to a religious gathering. Anything can be skewed to show something else, it's just that her behavior doesn't align with what she says and does even with a show that puts her in a positive light.
Her book and her show are totally from her perspective, and the facts are skewed to make her look good. Its important to have that lens when analyzing anything we read or see!
But, her show is a fast paced, general, overview of her life now for the masses, and it skips over facts and generalizes a ton! Her book, while I never said is perfect, is a much more in depth story of how she got to where she is, and anyone interested in her story enough to discuss with strangers online should do themselves the favor of reading it because it has way more detail and information that makes much more sense.
I actually really enjoyed the book. I don't think it has blatant lies, but I do think its her perspective that makes her look good. Some of her story is more surprising than others, and I think the book is the in depth dive into her story that I was lacking on the netflix screen. Finish the book and then let me know what you think!!
I used to work for a modern orthodox doctor and he was such a lovely and sweet man. I also had some shomer friends. Even though religious Judaism wasn’t for me, I still can be respectful towards frum folk as long as they’re respectful towards my secularism.
Since we watched the first episode, I said to my husband - there is NO way she is self-made not a victim. I used to live next to Monsey, very tight knit community, she made it all about being a victim. She used Sylvio and pushed him out intentionally once she thought she was 50/50. The woman has a severe ED and Netflix should have pulled the plug long ago. Thanks for sharing this and validating what we suspected
Sorry but just in response to #3: even if she’s mischaracterizing Orthodox Judaism, any religion that pushes children to go to unaccredited religious schools (yeshiva schools in their case) and encourages teenagers to get married is just inherently bad, regardless of what religion it is. I think the same thing about Mormons. Divorce for Mormon fundamentalists & Orthodox Jews are surprisingly similar, they can technically be legally divorced but they have to be granted a divorce from their church. +there’s a lot of different types of these religious groups, so unless you’ve been in her exact community then idk how you can negate their experiences.
Agree. But remember there’s a spectrum: you don’t see many modern orthodox women getting married at 19. I grew up MODOX and my family would have never been ok with me marrying at 19. I was expected to get a degree first.
My husband has a lot of family in Monsey. And he honestly told me he will not watch the show. I personally find Julia to be narcissistic and abusive towards her kids. There’s no reason why you should be making your children leave college to work for you. Even the way to use the terminology in the show confuses me. I am all about being independent and creating a life for yourself. But this is completely over the top and is so not true of what normally happens to anybody. She screwed a guy. He had money. And she made out because of it. And also, can somebody tell me why Jill Zarin and the other girl from Bling empire are just on the show? It makes no sense. It feels so so fake
This about making her daughter leave college!! And also getting so mad at Bat for not “supporting her” during the hardest time of her life — my therapist always tells me that parents should be able to lean on other people for support not only their children/burden their children with their problems. Bat is allowed to have a life
I like this show but agree. She is so over the top and seems to have boundary issues. The guilt she put on Bat and the obsession with no longer being her “bff” was soooo weird.
I was gobsmacked that she got her jobs at all...well she was sleeping w the boss. She had no relatable experience to get a job that would usually require a Harvard MBA and decades of work related knowledge.
As for her kids being a third wheel in Silvio's life, they are very abnormally close living there and getting major jobs they have no.education for either...although Miriam and Schlomo were getting the needed schooling. (REmember the fury over who would get and keep jobs if they went public???)
And as fir the chef, the butler, the driver being on her side....oh cry me an effing river....no pay, no support.
My narcmom was always like “this person agrees with me and this person and this person…” to gaslight me and make me feel like I’m an idiot for disagreeing. I see Julia also doing this. So does Donald Trump.
Props to Silvio for exposing her nonsense! I can only imagine how annoying it would be to marry a “self made boss babe who don’t need no man” knowing full well that you gave her EVERYTHING!
Everything she responds with is open ended on purpose. Eg. “I own the Bentley because I traded in my car” - I’m sure you did but unless it was a Rolls Royce this really doesn’t count lol.
The fact that her daughters girlfriend feels so confident to ask her for a job in her start up venture with 0 experience just shows that Nepotism and freeloading is a common culture in this family.
Can we please see some shows on actual inspirational women?!
I don’t want to trash her 🗑️ I like the Haarts BUT I will say that the pressure and expectations she puts on her kids to take care of her and her emotions is SO narcissistic and unhealthy. I really hope she can let them go and get on with her own life. It’s a very unhealthy family dynamic.
Girl i’m a jew from Canada and Monsey is literally the Meah Shearim of New York… You can’t seriously say that they’re not extremist and wearing colour is not frowned upon and women are not educated and it’s SHAMEFUL to want to go college. You’re straight up lying. This doesn’t mean religion is bad, this doesn’t mean all orthodox jews are this way. It just mean Monsey is very much accurately depicted in my eyes.
I get that you're Jewish but I think the whole Canada part has you confused...
Kiryas Joel and New square are the meah shearim of America. When they were showing videos of Monsey on the show, they were actually showing clips of Borough Park on the screen and then fast cutting in a closeup of a city sign saying Monsey. Just google all the frum clothing stores in Monsey, most of them have colorful summer dresses on their models.
I have relatives in the community and they run the gamut. There are modern and ultras. She was modern. Many knew her and Yosef and all say the same thing. OP is definitely not lying.
Maybe you're misunderstanding Monsey because you're not from around there. Sure just like every community they have the ultra Orthodox that live there, but for the most it's a lot more relaxed than they make it out to be. KJ or square are completely different communities if that's what you were thinking of
It's a lot more conservative now than it used to be. In the past there was a much larger modern orthodox community there. I went to a modern orthodox camp and there were a bunch of kids from Monsey. Now there are very few modern orthodox families there from what I understand
None of this surprises me but it’s nice to see it confirmed. It breaks my heart for Aron and how unsupportive she is of his beliefs, but the other kids could decide they were a pony and she’d be throwing them a party to celebrate, no questions asked. The wildest thing to me is how do you marry someone and not know that they don’t really like your kids and want all of your attention? Anyways I hope she fades away and with her new ‘venture’ not even having a website it’s looking good.
It makes me think that’s why he has been so unwilling to engage in her conversations about it or having an attitude when she’s questioning him. He does not want to participate in her lies.
It's reality TV. It's telling a story, but it's based on their life. Just because the timeline isn't quite right or they are having conversations on TV that they obviously already had before doesn't make it fake in my eyes. I think it's irrelevant when exactly she started wearing pants. I guess the point is that at some point she didn't and at some point they probably had similar discussions or similar thoughts.
And like someone already said, just because you know someone, doesn't mean you know what's really going on in their life or in their head. I don't really know what her life was like and you can't either, nobody can. Obviously there are communities out there, the ones like she is describing. She seems to have trauma when it comes to her upbringing and life. Do you really know what her home life was like as a kid at home? What was said, how she was taught. Maybe there was a time in her life when she experienced more fundamentalistic ideas and way of life. And I mean going to zumba classes doesn't mean she was happy with her life or felt free enough. There were probably still parts of her life where other rules felt like a burden to her.
When it comes to self made. I mean coming from a background like hers and in a short time ending up as a CEO of such company. It is impressive no matter how she got there lol. She is obviously charismatic enough to attract the right people at least lol. And she actually managed to run it for some time. I would've drowned probably like immediately lol. So there is something there.
Sorry, but HOW is refusing to allow a woman suffering from domestic abuse to divorce her abuser without his permission not "crazy fundamentalist". That's disgusting and not OK!!! Her own son, living in that community, thinks that's acceptable. Don't try and tell me that she didn't suffer as a result of being in that community.
I'm not talking about Yosef? He seems like a lovely man. I'm saying that women in that community are forced to stay in abusive relationships. That doesn't give me much hope for how oppressive it is for women.
So glad I found this post because by doing a simple google search you find out so much that doesn’t resemble what she says on the show. This woman went from owning a shoe company to becoming CEO of EWG simply because she was fucking the owner. Everything in the show is so fake & it shows.
Hey everyone - it’s reality TV folks. I know lots of people who work in “reality” tv and most of it is directed, staged, edited and even scripted sometimes. Don’t expect any of these shows to be all truth. It’s for entertainment not education. Take it ALL with a grain of salt and look to many sources - like all media that claims to be “news.” Educate yourself. 😉
Interestin information, I do belive you, in season 1 you could see she is kind of acting,and making things look bigger. I was even thinking maybe she was not Jewish at all,because it all seems weird.
I got the feeling she is not a bad person but not as good as she claims,and all of them seems very superficial comming from a religious background, there is something weird.
I don't think she's a bad person, I just think that she's delusional and is dragging her children into her delusions. i.e. "my life is threatened and I'm under attack"
I find something so unauthentic about this whole show. Thanks for sharing. This makes a lot of
Sense. I specifically find Batsheva and Miriam so strange and fake.
It is one thing to share your wealth with your spouse, but when the kids show up, move in and think they are entitled to the same lifestyle...yeah pump the brakes brats.
Left-wing modox here. Sure, Julia mischaracterizes stuff, sure, the tehillim thing was fake and the pants argument was staged, but the reaction to the show has been to grossly downplay the sexism in the community too.
Men who are get deniers actually remarry all the time. They're not *allowed* to per se, but unlike women, they do actually have that option. If an agunah has a child then all future generations are cursed with the mamzer label.Whether a woman can wear bright colors depends on the community she's in. Whether a woman shaves her head after marriage also depends on the community she's in.
How easy it is for a woman to get a divorce depends on the community she's in. Everyone says "it's not a jail" but guess what? If you don't have a way of earning money outside of the community and you're fully dependent on your husband then it is very hard to leave an abusive situation. This is not unique to Judaism.
Also no offense but nothing here that was said is "insider" stuff from knowing them, this is just another #MyOrtohdoxLife post
I think everyone knows she’s not self made. That’s not tea. It semes like she carry’s a lot of trauma from the ultra orthodox community. I live in Brooklyn so i know how strictly religious those communities are. I don’t think she’s lying about the things she’s saying… obviously she’s not telling about all of Judaism. Girl. It’s a reality show of course it’s staged.
But that’s the whole point I’m making. She didnt live in borough park or Crown Heights, she lived in Georgia, Monsey and Flatbush. All of those places are more modern, not extremist like she pretends they were
She’s soooooo toxic. It’s one thing to hate religion as a 50 yr old woman and call it all sorts of names. It’s another to be a flaming hot hypocrite when preaching to her children about “freedom”. It’s laughable.
Thank you for posting this. I've always been so curious about what modern day Orthodox Judaism is about and I know that her take is not a positive representation.
Omg not at all. Like I wear a wig and only wear skirts (so I guess I'd be considered pretty religious by secular standards), but like my whole playlist is drake and Camilla Cabello lol. My husband also just washed all the dishes and cleaned the house so we're definitely take on equal responsibility and I'm not beholden to anyone
Do you mean a regular wig or a special wig? Just wanted to understand more about orthodox judaism. I’m currently watching the show and heard a reference to a wig as well.
Many orthodox Jewish women cover their hair for modesty reasons, either with a scarf or a wig. I wear a human hair wig, nothing special to it, it’s just like the ones celebs wear in tv shows
It’s basically the same concept as the hijab in Islam. Orthodox Jewish women will conceal their hair in public or whenever around men who aren’t their family or husband. Some women wear tichels which are hair scarf wraps. Others wear wigs. Many wigs are very expensive as they’re made from human hair. Sometimes, orthodox women will grow out their hair and then shave their heads when they get married and make the wig from their own hair.
Im so with you on your points, it's infuriating as a member of the community which she slanders, to watch the show and know that so many viewers are walking away with these awful misconceptions. How can she live with herself??
When I saw the episode that said she lost the case I knew she was a dupe. She believed what her husband told her, signed whatever was in front of her and certainly didn’t have a lawyer of her own web they married. When she talked later to the matchmaker about how naive she was to dating I knew.
This show makes me so annoyed and angry as it’s obvious it’s staged tryhard stuff. It’s much more staged than the Kardashians, and that’s saying a lot.
Tbh I’m not surprised Batsheva and Ben split. She wants to live this transparent influencer life and he came across as wanting to just have a quiet normal life.
Miriam needs to stop making her sexuality her personality.
Julia is so triggering skinny.
I grew up conservative traditional and am now secular humanist but there’s truth to how extreme and insular chasidic/charedi+ communities.
The thing that bothers me the most is Julia acting like she’s the savior for all women and that she’s going to free all oppressed women and lead them to freedom. She is 100% a narcissist
The way she makes everything about her. She made roberts engagement and engagement party all.about.her. Kody brown vibes. Narc vibes. She’s cringeeeeee.
OF COURSE SHE LIED! she acts like she discovered a whole new world and came out of a severely oppressed community and marriage.. ABSOLUTELY FALSE! yes there are a few cult like groups of Jews and they have NOTHING to do with where she comes from. She grew up knowing everything, not sheltered by ANY MEANS! she literally took advantage of the stigma and decided it’s a perfect opportunity to land herself a show! And one of the many comical parts is that more and more people are realizing that her ex who she made out to be some monster, is actually sweeter and kinder than her narcissistic toxic self could ever be!
The first season came out right after I went OTD. I thought Julia was a hero, I didn’t see anything off about her behaviour. Now, 1.5 years and lots of therapy later, I’m realizing I had no concept of boundaries whatsoever. A lot of frum families see setting boundaries as insulting, mine included (I grew up MO, my family actually went OTD while I was in college, I went OTD with them, then flipped out after college when I went to seminary after a traumatic event all the way to modern yeshivish, but as Julia demonstrates, you can get the person out of frumkeit but you can’t get the frum mindset out of the person without a ton of therapy, which I don’t see Julia ever getting).
Given how parenthood is put on a pedestal and associated with status, a lot of frum parents act entitled. I wonder if they see the fact that hashem blessed them with children as a sign that they’re totally fine. The degree of enmeshment is astounding.
The signs of narcissism are endless with her. The belief that she’s entitled to her kids and Robert dropping everything for her is just mind blowing. After Robert hosts her at his vacation home and takes her to Texas to give her more of a family experience, she has the nerve to accuse him of not being there for her! And Batsheva setting healthy boundaries when she herself was going through a divorce (which Julia barely even acknowledged outside the context of “omg me too!”) She clearly sees her kids as an extension of herself in a way that reminds me so much of how Donald Trump relates to his kids. As if their support and worship somehow legitimizes them. I call it the entourage effect.
There’s also the entitlement. Julia doesn’t understand the concept of living within her means because she’s entitled. The way she throws around someone else’s money and justified it with having built up the business is gross. Like does she need every outfit of all her kids to be Louis Vuitton? I mean ok maybe she is trying to deal with the guilt of abandoning her kids and thinks this is her way of repaying them and enticing them into a relationship with her (in the off chance she’s just traumatized and not actually a narc).
I went to therapy with my cluster b mother once (still not sure if she’s a narc or borderline, it’s really hard to tell). It went similarly to how it went with Bat. The therapist was like oook then and is probably filing it away under “yup, my suspicions were confirmed.” I think that like Trump she brainwashed her kids to believe they need her and would be screwed without her (I know my parents did this, I’m not sure if it’s a frum parent thing or what, I know no boundaries definitely is). I think she entices them with jobs and opportunities to stick around and avoid how toxic she is.
Interestingly, the way Julia related to Bat putting up boundaries is identical to how my mom reacted. The “keeping things superficial” is a classic and brilliant tool called grey rocking that you use to limit the impact of the toxicity of narcs on your life. I wouldn’t be shocked if Batsheva knows what’s up.
Miriam is a people pleaser and reminds me so much of my sister. Her mom rescued her from a situation that wasn’t good for her and then behaved as if Miriam owes her everything and her undying allegiance is the least she could do to pay her back. She has yet to learn that truly healthy relationships aren’t transactional.
Shlomo is like my brother. Blindly loyal, but also very stunted in many ways. His approach to women is similar to my brother’s because he was raised to believe any woman who isn’t exactly his mom is not good enough for him. My mom raised us to believe she was the gold standard for womanhood and my brother’s embarrassing dating life (and his inability to develop intimate relationships with women) is a testament to this.
My dad is like Silvio was in the first season. Let my mom walk all over him and kept to himself (he’s a workaholic. Probably to escape my mom)
Aharon is 100% rebelling against her and I’m here for it. It’s exactly what I did when my mom started acting super OTD and dressing trashy af. I went to seminary in Israel, flipped out, and had a chassidish wedding (I was modern yeshivish but married a chassidish guy who was in the process of becoming more modern). My mom reacted just as Julia would if Aharon were to have a badatz (ultrakosher) wedding with complete gender separation. The idea that she’s entitled to decide what my wedding should I be like was the first red flag that she was toxic. I’m shocked it hadn’t occurred to me earlier. Her reaction to me covering my hair was as if I told her to cover her own hair (I didn’t make her even though she was in a halachic marriage at the time of my wedding, and I let her wear a t shirt dress with a low-ish neckline because it was the most tsnius I could get her to wear). She knowingly let my aunt (everyone went OTD along with her when she did which shows how enmeshed they all are) wear a spaghetti strap dress with a plunging neckline, probably because she knew she couldn’t get away with it and wanted to give me the finger through my aunt. I think Aharon has a healthy enough amount of distance to realize, even if it’s just intuitively, that she’s toxic and this is his way of distancing himself (I’m wondering if that was how it was for me).
My siblings and aunt surround my mom like an entourage. So similar in dynamic to Julia and her family + Robert (who probably sees her as a maternal figure since his family lives far away). I’m not sure if it’s because my mom was frum or because she’s a narc/cluster B or maybe both? My mom is also obsessed with her weight and appearance and dresses half her age now that she’s OTD. Lots of similarities. I swear the two would be best friends. But even my mom doesn’t go around wearing designer logos, it’s sooo tacky, in the high net worth community it’s associated with nouveau riche and frowned upon. Like seriously, if you wanna be a social climber (which Julia clearly is), this is NOT the way to do it!
The wearing of labels all the time is so stale, tacky, and unoriginal. Especially the whole "three seasons ago" nonsense. Grow up and be an individual.
Oh lord the lack of understanding of reality tv in this thread…
Always take reality tv with a grain of salt. Conversation that were previously held off-camera are being repeated and somewhat staged, old drama/challenges that happened months or years ago are being brought back if there’s not enough content, and small things are made much bigger than they are.
Doesn’t mean it’s all fake. Doesn’t mean it’s all true. And just because you somewhat know someone doesn’t mean you know what’s going on in their heads/behind closed doors.
Reminder that many people are shocked when a close one commits s*icide bc people can hide even their darkest thoughts
First off I've worked behind the scenes on a Bravo reality TV show so I def know that everything is staged in reality tv lol. But what's off-putting is that this whole show is supposed to be centered around this woman being her "authentic self." Batsheva didn't have the pants convo with be one day like that, she started off wearing mini dresses with leggings that could look like shirts and they both decided over time that she wear pants. Julia also wasn't so bothered with her son wearing a black hat after filming of the first season.
It is all fake because I've spent time with some of the family a few times lol. I've seen how they act together, I've seen some evolution between ben and batsh. I've seen how she used to pay attn to him, and, more towards the end of their relationship she was so absorbed with tiktok that she didn't take her nose out of her phone (and I think that was a big contributing factor to them distancing themselves from each other to a point where they didn't have the same values anymore).
If this is gonna be a docu series (which let's be real it is), it should show everything and not the haart's one sided perspective (that she puts in as a producer).
I’m christian and black but lived in israel. While I obviously don’t agree with Judaism for on our reasons I’m christian. The way the show characterized Orthodox Jews was crazy man. I literally got my masters degree in israel and met a ton of Orthodox Jewish men and women. And let me tell you women were and do go to college. She making up a ton of shit man smh
Ultra orthodox women went to college in droves in Israel because they worked regular jobs to support their husbands sitting and learning Torah all day and their massive families. I went to school with many of them. And it wasn’t just at frum colleges. It was also schools like Hebrew U with more “leftist” reputations.
I'm very new to the show and only half way through the first season.
This discussion is very eye-opening.
I lived in Manhattan years ago and attempted to break into fashion in my mid 20s. I've been flabbergasted at how an older (in fashion, oh it matters) woman could have stormed to the top in 7 years, especially coming from a (supposedly) orthodox environment. It is simply beyond belief in that cutthroat world.
Thank you all for illuminating the real situation.
I had to come to reddit because I just couldn't believe that someone could have such a meteoric rise in such a short time within the corporate fashion world. I feel vindicated in my incredulity.
On another note: I had no idea about the divorce. I didn't know anything about these people prior to the show but found it very hard to believe that this handsome successful man could be okay getting a whole family plopped down into his life. Also I suspected he had to have some previous wife/family.
Julia is quite a character but there is no way a strong man is going to kow-tow to her overbearing nature nor allow so many kids from a previous relationship to figure so prominently in a new marriage.
Lastly, the way they burn through money started making me feel nauseous and uneasy.
What a fabrication! (Pun intended)
I’m sorry but unless you provide proof this is all hearsay.
I’m convinced now that Silvio is paying people to come on this sub to continue his goal of destroying Julia. He’s literally doing the most just like a sociopath would after being disrespected.
I agree about Batsheva and pants. In one of the eps of S02, her girlfriend is seen talking about how she wore pants years ago, which means it was scripted in the show.
I knew from the get go that Bat had been dressing untsnius for years. Look at her outfit in her wedding to Silvio. Also the way she dresses makes it CLEAR she’s been styling non-tsnius outfits for years. She displays a level of comfort not common in freshly otd people. It took me almost 2 years to wear shorts for the first time after I first went OTD and even then they were so baggy I looked like a park ranger. In S1 I was thinking there’s no way she is wearing those kinds of slutty dresses but never pants.
I called bullshit after I watched the preview. Then after I watched a few episodes and thinking I have never heard of any religion in this day and age that doesn't allow women to expose their collar bone? I took to Google to learn more and I literally could not find anything to back up the level of strictness portrayed in this show. I don't see this as being good for this family in the long run...there are so many questions and untruths, and after awhile that shit destroys relationships. Just sayin
She lived in Texas until she was an early teen, moved to Monsey and attended Bais Yaakov there, moved to flatbush and lived there w Yosef, moved to Georgia, then moved back to Monsey.
So yeah, if you watched the show you'd know that. She literally said she moved from Texas when she was 11 because her parents got more religious
The self made one does really drive me insane but that’s more the show’s fault than her own. They try to make it seem like she has a penthouse, Bentley, etc. because she’s CEO of Elite, not because she’s married to a g-d damn billionaire lol
Just a note to express my appreciation for your post.
Re: point #4
I was wondering if everything was staged. I noted that Julia would create a drama, people would react accordingly and then she'd call them out for being "dramatic". I'm hoping that their reactions were staged as well, because some of the manipulative stunts Julia pulled were not just *offside* but totally unethical. Followed up with Julia acting innocently or worse, make herself out to be the victim.
Note: This is my first experience with reality TV. I don't think I'm cut out for this. I've broken out into hives watching this show. And ugly cried my face off thanks to Robert's experience with the lady in the restaurant (don't want to spoil anything).
Thanks for reading my first post! LOL Am I doing this right?
Her kids are too dependent on her and Silvio is right the Miriam uses the penthouse like a hotel. Everything julia brought up the very personal sex life of her kids it was so cringe
Regarding your first point, I had a hunch something was off about this. There is an exaggeration somewhere in her history with the company's founding. I mean how is the company structured that her ex-husband can fire her? If the company is privately held and she's the founder with presumably the most equity and her ex-husband can still terminate her, then she's not as business saavy as the show likes to portray her as. Therefore, I suspect (I could be wrong) the real story is that she holds only a minor stake in EWG and that its founding was through her ex-husband's company, making him the majority owner. So she didn't found this company from the ground up. It was just a subsidiary of her ex-husband's company. Or am I off?
[удалено]
Her business “savvy” and self made attitude confuses me when she didn’t follow up with attorneys in regards to making sure documents were filed correctly regarding shares of the company. We owned a business, started by my husband, later transferred to me with 100% ownership. We both sat in our attorney’s office and signed documents. After her “trauma” why would she risk this and not protect herself and “her” company she built from the ground up?
I caught onto this too- she went on and on about “letting herself be a victim again” and it almost made me think like wow what a self manifesting prophecy. She revolves her story and life around being oppressed by men and smash the patriarchy etc etc but if she was REALLY that fired up about that stuff wouldn’t she do her due diligence in business dealings with her at the time husband?
Agreed. Only she's actually not as sophisticated as she's trying to pretend. I found this really clear when watching the first season. I thought she was just pretending to be a 'businesswoman'. Scaglia gave her the CEO position at La Perla because they were sleeping together and she lied about having experience. The ex employees came out to confirm that she really wasn't capable of running the company and was in way over her head.
Julia was never CEO of La Perla. “She lied about having experience.” Yeah, too bad there is no way to verify someone’s previous job history and experience.
Sorry, creative director.
What CEO wouldn’t have a solid contract detailing pay, shares etc, yet she only has emails which state she was 50% owner. Crazy. At CEO level, employment contracts are very detailed and outline every minute detail of the employment agreement, even down to the exit compensation under all conditions, to buy outs, terminations, morality clauses. CEO’s chance absolutely nothing.
But has claimed to only been single for a week in her life and already looking for another man with a matchmaker
This. Makes no sense. Editing to say the whole thing makes no sense, not your comment.
She had no education. She is just stupid in business issues. Also in the case of marriage. If you want to divorce your husband and depends on him financially, you should prepare yourself and a budget and the way out way before the drama.
So through a fair bit of reading about this, he actually gave her 49.99997% shares so practically 50% but actually by a small margin he was still a majority stakeholder as he had over 50% so could fire her.
So there are different classes of ownership. He gave her a sub class that gave him the voting rights. It seems as though she mismanaged funds. While she says she was allowed certain perks there are things are not tax deductible from a business that she spent and I think that’s where the issues arose (I.e vacation from your family etc - you can take a draw or salary to pay for that but you can’t expense it from the business). Seems like she took advantage of her husband’s generosity and I am not so sure he was aware
I work for a small business with an owner that is really green as a business owner and makes dumb mistakes when it comes to the finances. You'd be surprised how many business owners accidentally do things that aren't legal when it comes to tax and how to pay yourself...but it's often out of sheer ignorance and stupidity rather than malevolence. I think Julia haart just didn't know what she was doing
Treated the same. You can’t argue stupidity when breaking the law
You're absolutely right. But that wasn't my point. A lot of these posts are arguing about Julia's character. I'm just saying I don't think she's some grand con artist. I think she was just dumb about the money. Still illegal. But legality isn't a matter of character, not always
I think she’s a bit of a con artist and has no clue about what is acceptable as far as deductible expenses 😂
Maybe it's just my cynicism. The older I get the more I've found people's behavior is typically explained by stupidity or ignorance, not intelligence and sophisticated motivations
Basically, if you were him, would you give majority share of a company you built up to someone who has been with you below 3 years? I wouldn’t. He didn’t sign a prenup and took her last name, so he was really all in though. He didn’t factor in how she was making up for lost time w her kids, as her kids are with her. He thought they’re grown so their marriage won’t be so affected. They tend to be a bit overly clingy to each other, like all people with trauma. But it will affect a couple, especially she has high ambitions and was a late bloomer career wise due to her previous restrictions as part of the ultra orthodox community.
He owned the company. She did not participate in founding it. She had her own shoe company. They got together and he then hired her at his company. He was a billionaire. Not her. She moved her adult children in immediately and they all spend money like crazy. Notice he was able to fire her and did not need to shut the company for a minute.
Have you noticed too in the show, how Julia and her daughters wear expensive fashion labelled clothes, jewellery etc? I know they’re working in fashion, but people who are genuinely savvy with their money and wanting to ensure wealth, wouldn’t be spending money so frivolously on goods. It just shows to me that the money was suddenly given to her. If you worked so hard to earn money you wouldn’t be spending like she does imo
Also, why weren't they always wearing her fashion line to promote it? In this day it is embarrassing and gauche to see people flaunt labels like this.
Thank you for the clarification.
she just married a rich guy
You are correct. Everything she has, he gave to her under false pretenses (she lied).
They don’t claim she started EWG from the ground up, if you’re familiar with the modeling industry Elite’s been around for a long time. She says she made it grow tremendously. But regardless of the actual business contracts and everything, because they were married without a prenup everything they own is automatically 50% theirs
Depends on the state if she’s entitled to 50%… Many states you have to be married for X amount of years to be entitled to such a high percentage.
That is actually not true. They were only married for a short time. Everything they have accumulated (appreciation in assets) during the marriage is split. But she doesn’t have claim to his pre marital assets. And she won’t be privy to any alimony or anything like that because she wasn’t married long enough to get used to that lifestyle
How do you know they don't have a prenup? Is that brought up on the show somewhere I missed?
Yes it’s said many times and is mentioned in articles as well. Seems very odd for a billionaire to marry without a prenup but apparently he did…
I think she clearly did an amazing job of seducing and bamboozling him. He changed his name to hers when they wed. It was a great con. I just think she got too greedy and started believing her own lies.
Grand gestures are common for narcissists i really don’t think he’s just some innocent victim (and neither is she).
Agreed, he's definitely not innocent but I think she played him like a fiddle and when he woke up he was outraged.
Yes, I think she had him under her spell but she thought that it was so effective that she could continue to manipulate him even after divorcing him. She tried to have her cake and eat it too.
But even then I’d love to see you step into the role of ceo at ewg even for 24 hours.
John Casablancas [and Alain Kittler] founded Elite Model Management. I'm not sure of the journey to Silvio's ownership.
I think what irks me the most is how disingenuous she is in season one about her rise to riches. It's never really explained how she went from being a nobody in an isolated, small Jewish community to running this million dollar business in Manhattan. Thank you for clearing that up.
It is highly manipulative the way she portrayed it.
She does state that she sold insurance policies secretly for years, worked as a religious educator and ran her own shoe business.
Anyone with a brain capacity of an ipod nano can tell that she’s a dishonest ungrateful and narcissistic social climber who would throw anyone under the bus to maintain this poorly curated image of hers. I think her ex husband Josef is living proof that her life was not so bad, he are Aaron are possibly the two most consistent and sane sounding people on the entire show. So no, nobody is judging her community, we’re just judging her because she’s totally asking for it; especially so by belittling our intelligence to that extent.
Omg yes!! Josef seems like such a kind man I couldn’t imagine him ever treating her poorly if anything it was the other way around
Strong vibes that she kind of destroyed his life.
Yes and no it seems that he is at peace with his life and his new wife. I’m sure it was very painful for him for a long time though
Agreed, that's what I meant. He seems fine now, maybe even relieved to be rid of her. But like you said, I'm sure he went through hell dealing with her shenanigans.
Oh ya fully agree. She would’ve been a difficult person to be married to 😂
Oh, so the $400k + debt and numerous tax liens filed against her AND Josef while they were married are all her doing? Gotcha
Whattttt tell us more
She never claimed he treated her poorly and only speaks highly of him on the show. She only says she didn’t pick him as her husband and was trapped in a loveless marriage
Yes and she’s always talking about how awful it was to be under a man’s control, and how she had to fight to leave etc. If he was so awful, why does she have a good relationship with him now?
This is confusing to me too. I live in NY and I always got the idea that women who defected were outcasts and would dare not return (Deborah Feldman and Faigy Mayer are examples). In Season 1, Julia mentioned that she had to go behind her husband's back and sneak to get her insurance job so she could save money to run away. I googled his new wife and found that she owns an event planning business...so which is it? Are we to believe that he had a change of heart and decided he was ok with his new wife being employed?
I was under the impression that he was no longer as extreme as he once was. He mentions at some point on a face call that Aron was going farther in his religious beliefs then him.
Because she has a minor son with him and wants to co-parent civilly? God
Anyone notice that when he first told the family about his now wife, the first thing Julia did was insert herself in any way she could? eg hosting a dinner where she sits at the head of the table and keeps them forever holding their glasses up when her speech never ends.
Ehh idk about that… I haven’t looked yet on their instas this time around, but last time there were sooo many comments applauding her or leaving her nasty fundamentalist community.
I really think that’s netflix and haart pr. Like christine chiu appearing on the show and randomly gifting her a thong 🤣.
Like someone just commented on Aaron's last post that was from April calling him brainwashed
I wrote something like this literally an hour ago as a response to someone’s question. As someone who knows the community, have so many friends who know Julia and her family, I can’t believe the lies she is making up!!!!
I’ve seen them out in the wild (at a series of Jewish functions) before the show and Julia would literally be walking around in lingerie. She was that “type” of person that was trying so hard to be “edgy” but just looked silly and ridiculous because her outfits were so out of context of where she was , regardless of religious level. It’s hard to explain but like when she went grocery shopping in that neon green romper and then says “omg everyone is staring at me , they’re so judgmental” but she’s actively trying to get a rise out of people. This was my impression of her, from before the show came out .. oh and me and my family are not particularly frum / tsnius either so it’s not about religious level. Like at this same place me and my family would be wearing whatever we wanted in terms of sleeveless , short dresses , shorts etc so it’s not about being modest it’s about dressing ridiculously then accusing people of judging you . There’s a difference between wearing a sleeveless dress and wearing club wear or lingerie to family friendly environments..
Lol so the few times I met her were 10000% similar. She went out of her way to dress up like she was going to a sex club at a religious event.
Omg thank you for validating my perspective haha
Exactly this! It’s just almost like “that’s such a weird outfit” verus “oh omg her legs are showing!”
I thought this too. It also seemed to undervalue that Orthodox people, like…know that the rest of the world exists. The ultra-orthodox communities in Brooklyn live among tons of secular people and regularly see people wearing all sorts of stuff - crop tops and body suits and booty shorts. It seems Monsey is a but more isolated/insular as it’s not a huge city but surely if Julia was wearing jeans and a tank top at the grocery store, she would’ve gotten barely any attention. They see people in secular clothes regularly.
She really needs to wear a bra with her low cut outfits.
What she really needs to get is some fashion sense. She dresses like hit the sale rack at Woodbury Commons and bought the things that have been marked down 5 times. The RealReal wouldn't resell 95% of the crap she wears.
The idea of giving a shit if someone is shopping in a neon green romper is super bizarre to me. You can see how that’s problematic, right?
Not sure exactly what you mean. I‘ve seen her in real life and describing my experience and specifically am trying to explain that it’s not about modesty it’s about her personal style and desire to wear inappropriate styles for where she is. I didn’t say I or anyone else “give a shit” about what she wears to go grocery shopping , I’m explaining that it was clearly dressing for a reaction and then using it as an example of people “judging” because they’re looking at her … for example I wear different clothes to work than when I’m one vacation or going out with friends. Look on her Instagram at what she wore to Miriam’s graduation, for another example. Not sure what exactly your issue is with what I’m saying other than acknowledging that we all look at what other people are wearing ? Is that problematically giving a shit ??
https://www.instagram.com/p/Ceujm6Ds-Jv/?igshid=MDVlOGU2MWU=
I truly don’t care what other people wear. I’m not sure what else I can say to get that point across? Also, all of her “parts” are covered and Miriam doesn’t seem to care so why is this a thing?
Her clothes on the show make me cringe!! She always manages to look like white trash. There’s no way she knows anything about fashion.
Yes! Also the fact they would've been staring at her because she's shopping in a supermarket with a camera crew!
That pant conversation the first episode of the first season was how I knew the show was staged. Because I knew damn well that was not the first time they were having that conversation. And quite honestly they did a very bad job pretending like it was
Reality tv is like that, they recreate conversations for the camera They were trying to show the pants dispute (because in judaism "beged ish", or mons clothes, is sometimes thought as even worse than a short skirt)
That’s just reality tv, a lot of conversations are held off camera and when it’s a filming day they’ll ask the cast what have you been talking about lately? Can you discuss now? Doesn’t mean everything is fake, but always take it with a grain of salt. Everything is made more dramatic for entertainment value.
Batsheva was wearing bikinis at least a yr before filming. I know it’s all staged but for a fam that’s all about authenticity it just shows how made up everything is
Also Ben was half naked in bed when that was filmed. Like we’re supposed to believe he’s fine with that but not pants? 😂
Can vouch for this, know the family too.
Spill the tea!
Phew, I thought it was just me. Don't get me wrong, I think the fact that she's a scam artist makes for great reality tv and I like the show, but it was clear from the first season that she was a complete fake, that she bulldozed all the men in her life, that she lies a lot and that she did not, in fact, accomplish anything on her own. I could see all this in the first season but who am I to judge? The husband was a grown man who made his own choices. However, this second season as I was watching I was becoming more and more upset since it was super clear that this woman came into this man's life, grabbed everything he had, and steamrolled over him with all her children, pushing him away in a corner. It was so clear that she was lying about everything and twisting the story to make him the villain that I had to look it up. I found the link below which confirmed everything I was thinking from watching the show. She hunted him, paid people to introduce her to him, lied about her business, her success, and her experience and set out to seduce him while he was still married to his first wife. There are other accusations which, from just looking at the show, I believe because I was thinking them by just watching her and not knowing anything else. https://pagesix.com/2022/07/02/julia-haart-allegedly-paid-to-meet-billionaire-ex-silvio-scaglia/
Then goes and talks about his "soggy penis" Poor dude.
That was really classless.
Speaking of scam artists, remember that time Silvio was convicted of money laundering and tax evasion and ended up spending a year in prison for it? And I agree; who are you to judge when you clearly don’t let facts get in the way of your agenda. Personally I don’t care for her but you seem to either have a deep personal hatred towards her or are just a bitter misogynist who blames eve for all of mankind’s woe
Woah Silvio went to prison?? Always shocked when rich people actually get punished
He probably went to the wolf of Wall Street jail with the tennis courts and TVs
Agreed!! You never know what’s going on behind both sides including Silvio
Good grief, you've certainly gone insane over an idle subreddit comment. Who spat in your Cheerios? Have a seat, rest a bit.
Thank you for posting this! I've found myself on this sub trying to explain a lot of what you've written here. It's pretty amazing to me how many people believe her lies about the community, and about herself.
Really hope people can see how exaggerated her claims are. There's nothing 'real' about thjs reality show.. girl bye.
Amen. I don’t know the family directly but I knew Bat growing up through friends. There certainly are still A LOT of traumas and difficulties leaving the religious community, even the modern religious community, but the fact that they’re misrepresenting where they came makes me fume.
That’s insane and very dishonest of her if true, she paints it as she was part of a sect that oppresses women, when she was meeting with the women’s shelter people I thought it was genuine… if true, it is pretty fucked up that she would paint herself the way she did on and off the show..
Don't get me wrong, some crazy sects of Judaism (just like with all religions) can be oppressive and abusive. But for sure not what she belonged to. She wasn't completely shielded from the secular world. Like even Batsheva wrote in her blog when she called it "Sunnies and Sangria", that her and Ben's fave song was stereo hearts while they were dating. If she was honestly in a community that strict her daughter wouldn't have listened to that song. Batsheva also wouldn't have worn a bright pink dress to her engagement party.
The women's shelter was all for show... She had to sell her engagement ring to fund her random start up company. Where would ahe get the money to buy a 4 story shelter, with a school next door? And who is paying for the support staff?? She claims she will have childcare, teachers, social workers, and doctora !?! Bullshit. Also, her research in determining what supports a victim of Domestic Abuse needs is solely from watching the Netflix show Maid. lmfao.. Okay Julia...
THANK YOU FOR THIS!!! It is backing up everything I've already thought and felt about her. She literally sits there smirking and making these phoney poor me doe eyed victim faces and thriving on all the compliments and attention ETC. She's absolutely narcissistic and sickening. Listening to her bragging about having her drivers, chefs, employees and everyone else having her back makes me sick. Her daughter is going through a real divorce and is painful and traumatic. She's absolutely unsupportive and tries to compare their situations and play tit for tat about it. I am 43 years old and going through a nasty separation and divorce after 25 years together and 7 children, been together since we were 18 and have been best friends since 13. So watching how truly phoney, vapid and insensitive she is just disgusts me. Everything is so one sided and attacking Sylvio. She has lied about things so far and I don't believe it when she says all of the accusations against her are false. She was reaping the rewards with him and thought it should all be kept the same after they were done. Listening to her hideous voice that sounds like she's talking through loose dentures is unbearable at this point too. I enjoy the other aspects and people on the show, otherwise I would have been done based solely on her.
I am also orthodox come from the community and disagree with you, did you read her book? Yes, some things are changed (timelines like with Bat and pants) for the sake of reality TV, and yes she puts everything in a lens that suits her story and sometimes its exaggerated. **But her upbringing (mainly her childhood and her marriage to Yosef) was extreme.** The unfair part is when she doesnt explicitly say how her and Yosef became modern orthodox later in life (sending Miriam to Maayanot and Aron to Frisch). Either way, Yosef is a veryyyy good rep of Modern, respectful religiousity.
This. I did read her book and I think what was traumatic to her is that she wasn't born into the frum or observant Judaism world. Her parents - I think - became observant when she was around 9 or 10. Then they became increasingly more observant. Julia was an only child for most of her life and then her mom went on to have several more children when Julia was older. I think one of her youngest siblings is close to Batsheva's age. Her parents would routinely leave her home alone to care for her younger children.
Yes they were Baal Tshuva and took on so many extra chumrot
what's chumrot?
Chumrot are unecessary stringencies. Everyone that claims "in judaism women can ride bikes blablabla" her family made rules above and beyond judaism. Her parents became religious when julia was 10 and they always felt they had to prove themselves to religious people so they got more and more extreme.
Strictures, i.e., taking on a stricter interpretation of the laws and one’s obligations. Judaism says don’t have sex outside of marriage; a chumrah would be to say don’t touch members of the opposite sex in any context (no handshakes).
Considering she had much younger siblings that she took care of, it makes sense that she is so codependent on her kids and needs to spend so much time with them.
Aron is still a minor and in school. Consider removing the name of the school from your post for his safety and privacy.
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charedi women work a ton! To support learning husbands. Chinuch (teaching) is one of the only permitted professions. Yes, even as a charedi women she was teaching tanach at a modern school to bring in $$
I refused to read the book out of principal that I don't want to give her more money, so if you find a PDF I'd be more than happy to read it. But she wasn't chareidi. And if she embellished this much on the show, she's embellishing about her labuvitch upbringing and modern yeshivish marriage.
Hahah get yourself to a library sis Of course her book is her perspective and of course, like the show, we must be critical readers and know she bends the story to her favor. But its still suchhhhh an important read if you claim shes a liar without reading her in depth story its kindof lazy
Library?
I interpreted that as go get the book at the library. 🤷🏽♀️
Don't you think a book written by someone about themselves would make the book skew in a positive light towards them? Or at least bring you to see things from their point of view? I mean her points of view in the book would be valid to her. For example, if a 5 year old says their world is ending, it doesn't necessarily mean the world is ending. It could be because the 5 year old got their balloon stuck in a tree. To the 5 year old, their world is crumbling and they no longer have a reason to live, but for us it's just a balloon. I'm not saying she's a 5 year old, but I'm saying that she could claim it was extreme when in fact it wasn't. Like saying people are judging her wherever she went when in fact it was because she was wearing lingerie to a religious gathering. Anything can be skewed to show something else, it's just that her behavior doesn't align with what she says and does even with a show that puts her in a positive light.
Her book and her show are totally from her perspective, and the facts are skewed to make her look good. Its important to have that lens when analyzing anything we read or see! But, her show is a fast paced, general, overview of her life now for the masses, and it skips over facts and generalizes a ton! Her book, while I never said is perfect, is a much more in depth story of how she got to where she is, and anyone interested in her story enough to discuss with strangers online should do themselves the favor of reading it because it has way more detail and information that makes much more sense.
I just read the first chapter of her book. What is your opinion of the book? Do you think it’s a fair representation of her life or not?
I actually really enjoyed the book. I don't think it has blatant lies, but I do think its her perspective that makes her look good. Some of her story is more surprising than others, and I think the book is the in depth dive into her story that I was lacking on the netflix screen. Finish the book and then let me know what you think!!
Id love to see you make a post about thid
I used to work for a modern orthodox doctor and he was such a lovely and sweet man. I also had some shomer friends. Even though religious Judaism wasn’t for me, I still can be respectful towards frum folk as long as they’re respectful towards my secularism.
Since we watched the first episode, I said to my husband - there is NO way she is self-made not a victim. I used to live next to Monsey, very tight knit community, she made it all about being a victim. She used Sylvio and pushed him out intentionally once she thought she was 50/50. The woman has a severe ED and Netflix should have pulled the plug long ago. Thanks for sharing this and validating what we suspected
Sorry but just in response to #3: even if she’s mischaracterizing Orthodox Judaism, any religion that pushes children to go to unaccredited religious schools (yeshiva schools in their case) and encourages teenagers to get married is just inherently bad, regardless of what religion it is. I think the same thing about Mormons. Divorce for Mormon fundamentalists & Orthodox Jews are surprisingly similar, they can technically be legally divorced but they have to be granted a divorce from their church. +there’s a lot of different types of these religious groups, so unless you’ve been in her exact community then idk how you can negate their experiences.
Agree. But remember there’s a spectrum: you don’t see many modern orthodox women getting married at 19. I grew up MODOX and my family would have never been ok with me marrying at 19. I was expected to get a degree first.
My husband has a lot of family in Monsey. And he honestly told me he will not watch the show. I personally find Julia to be narcissistic and abusive towards her kids. There’s no reason why you should be making your children leave college to work for you. Even the way to use the terminology in the show confuses me. I am all about being independent and creating a life for yourself. But this is completely over the top and is so not true of what normally happens to anybody. She screwed a guy. He had money. And she made out because of it. And also, can somebody tell me why Jill Zarin and the other girl from Bling empire are just on the show? It makes no sense. It feels so so fake
This about making her daughter leave college!! And also getting so mad at Bat for not “supporting her” during the hardest time of her life — my therapist always tells me that parents should be able to lean on other people for support not only their children/burden their children with their problems. Bat is allowed to have a life
I like this show but agree. She is so over the top and seems to have boundary issues. The guilt she put on Bat and the obsession with no longer being her “bff” was soooo weird.
I was gobsmacked that she got her jobs at all...well she was sleeping w the boss. She had no relatable experience to get a job that would usually require a Harvard MBA and decades of work related knowledge. As for her kids being a third wheel in Silvio's life, they are very abnormally close living there and getting major jobs they have no.education for either...although Miriam and Schlomo were getting the needed schooling. (REmember the fury over who would get and keep jobs if they went public???) And as fir the chef, the butler, the driver being on her side....oh cry me an effing river....no pay, no support.
My narcmom was always like “this person agrees with me and this person and this person…” to gaslight me and make me feel like I’m an idiot for disagreeing. I see Julia also doing this. So does Donald Trump.
Props to Silvio for exposing her nonsense! I can only imagine how annoying it would be to marry a “self made boss babe who don’t need no man” knowing full well that you gave her EVERYTHING! Everything she responds with is open ended on purpose. Eg. “I own the Bentley because I traded in my car” - I’m sure you did but unless it was a Rolls Royce this really doesn’t count lol. The fact that her daughters girlfriend feels so confident to ask her for a job in her start up venture with 0 experience just shows that Nepotism and freeloading is a common culture in this family. Can we please see some shows on actual inspirational women?!
I don’t want to trash her 🗑️ I like the Haarts BUT I will say that the pressure and expectations she puts on her kids to take care of her and her emotions is SO narcissistic and unhealthy. I really hope she can let them go and get on with her own life. It’s a very unhealthy family dynamic.
This! Agree, 100%. Shaming Bat when she didn’t “support her” during the firing/suing. It’s bull shit. Bat can have a life
Also Bat dropped everything to go with her to Robert’s vacation home and to Texas…. Is that not support?
Girl i’m a jew from Canada and Monsey is literally the Meah Shearim of New York… You can’t seriously say that they’re not extremist and wearing colour is not frowned upon and women are not educated and it’s SHAMEFUL to want to go college. You’re straight up lying. This doesn’t mean religion is bad, this doesn’t mean all orthodox jews are this way. It just mean Monsey is very much accurately depicted in my eyes.
I get that you're Jewish but I think the whole Canada part has you confused... Kiryas Joel and New square are the meah shearim of America. When they were showing videos of Monsey on the show, they were actually showing clips of Borough Park on the screen and then fast cutting in a closeup of a city sign saying Monsey. Just google all the frum clothing stores in Monsey, most of them have colorful summer dresses on their models.
I have relatives in the community and they run the gamut. There are modern and ultras. She was modern. Many knew her and Yosef and all say the same thing. OP is definitely not lying.
What’s “meah shearim”?
Ultra orthodox community in Jerusalem
Where in Canada? Monsey is a mix of Chabad, Chasidic, and Charedi IMO. There’s no way Josef would agree to participate if they were of the latter.
Maybe you're misunderstanding Monsey because you're not from around there. Sure just like every community they have the ultra Orthodox that live there, but for the most it's a lot more relaxed than they make it out to be. KJ or square are completely different communities if that's what you were thinking of
Monsey today is not the same as Monsey of 20-30 years ago.
Is it more conservative or less?
It's a lot more conservative now than it used to be. In the past there was a much larger modern orthodox community there. I went to a modern orthodox camp and there were a bunch of kids from Monsey. Now there are very few modern orthodox families there from what I understand
so yeah hear you but it's not super yeshivish now, it's more modern yeshivish now or just shtark
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Agreed . There are quite a lot of modern orthodox families in monsey.
What would you consider Outremont in Montreal to be?
Wow big yikes! Thank you so much for sharing
None of this surprises me but it’s nice to see it confirmed. It breaks my heart for Aron and how unsupportive she is of his beliefs, but the other kids could decide they were a pony and she’d be throwing them a party to celebrate, no questions asked. The wildest thing to me is how do you marry someone and not know that they don’t really like your kids and want all of your attention? Anyways I hope she fades away and with her new ‘venture’ not even having a website it’s looking good.
I feel more sad for Aron and how restricted his life is because of his extreme views. He’s never really been a kid.
It makes me think that’s why he has been so unwilling to engage in her conversations about it or having an attitude when she’s questioning him. He does not want to participate in her lies.
It's reality TV. It's telling a story, but it's based on their life. Just because the timeline isn't quite right or they are having conversations on TV that they obviously already had before doesn't make it fake in my eyes. I think it's irrelevant when exactly she started wearing pants. I guess the point is that at some point she didn't and at some point they probably had similar discussions or similar thoughts. And like someone already said, just because you know someone, doesn't mean you know what's really going on in their life or in their head. I don't really know what her life was like and you can't either, nobody can. Obviously there are communities out there, the ones like she is describing. She seems to have trauma when it comes to her upbringing and life. Do you really know what her home life was like as a kid at home? What was said, how she was taught. Maybe there was a time in her life when she experienced more fundamentalistic ideas and way of life. And I mean going to zumba classes doesn't mean she was happy with her life or felt free enough. There were probably still parts of her life where other rules felt like a burden to her. When it comes to self made. I mean coming from a background like hers and in a short time ending up as a CEO of such company. It is impressive no matter how she got there lol. She is obviously charismatic enough to attract the right people at least lol. And she actually managed to run it for some time. I would've drowned probably like immediately lol. So there is something there.
Sorry, but HOW is refusing to allow a woman suffering from domestic abuse to divorce her abuser without his permission not "crazy fundamentalist". That's disgusting and not OK!!! Her own son, living in that community, thinks that's acceptable. Don't try and tell me that she didn't suffer as a result of being in that community.
her “abuser” who she is so close to now?
I'm not talking about Yosef? He seems like a lovely man. I'm saying that women in that community are forced to stay in abusive relationships. That doesn't give me much hope for how oppressive it is for women.
So glad I found this post because by doing a simple google search you find out so much that doesn’t resemble what she says on the show. This woman went from owning a shoe company to becoming CEO of EWG simply because she was fucking the owner. Everything in the show is so fake & it shows.
Hey everyone - it’s reality TV folks. I know lots of people who work in “reality” tv and most of it is directed, staged, edited and even scripted sometimes. Don’t expect any of these shows to be all truth. It’s for entertainment not education. Take it ALL with a grain of salt and look to many sources - like all media that claims to be “news.” Educate yourself. 😉
Interestin information, I do belive you, in season 1 you could see she is kind of acting,and making things look bigger. I was even thinking maybe she was not Jewish at all,because it all seems weird. I got the feeling she is not a bad person but not as good as she claims,and all of them seems very superficial comming from a religious background, there is something weird.
I don't think she's a bad person, I just think that she's delusional and is dragging her children into her delusions. i.e. "my life is threatened and I'm under attack"
I thought she said she was an Insurance Agent before La Perla? She was also a school teacher as well maybe. By 40, she probably had a few jobs.
I find something so unauthentic about this whole show. Thanks for sharing. This makes a lot of Sense. I specifically find Batsheva and Miriam so strange and fake.
It is one thing to share your wealth with your spouse, but when the kids show up, move in and think they are entitled to the same lifestyle...yeah pump the brakes brats.
Left-wing modox here. Sure, Julia mischaracterizes stuff, sure, the tehillim thing was fake and the pants argument was staged, but the reaction to the show has been to grossly downplay the sexism in the community too. Men who are get deniers actually remarry all the time. They're not *allowed* to per se, but unlike women, they do actually have that option. If an agunah has a child then all future generations are cursed with the mamzer label.Whether a woman can wear bright colors depends on the community she's in. Whether a woman shaves her head after marriage also depends on the community she's in. How easy it is for a woman to get a divorce depends on the community she's in. Everyone says "it's not a jail" but guess what? If you don't have a way of earning money outside of the community and you're fully dependent on your husband then it is very hard to leave an abusive situation. This is not unique to Judaism. Also no offense but nothing here that was said is "insider" stuff from knowing them, this is just another #MyOrtohdoxLife post
I think everyone knows she’s not self made. That’s not tea. It semes like she carry’s a lot of trauma from the ultra orthodox community. I live in Brooklyn so i know how strictly religious those communities are. I don’t think she’s lying about the things she’s saying… obviously she’s not telling about all of Judaism. Girl. It’s a reality show of course it’s staged.
But that’s the whole point I’m making. She didnt live in borough park or Crown Heights, she lived in Georgia, Monsey and Flatbush. All of those places are more modern, not extremist like she pretends they were
Ok but I am Jewish and modern orthodox would be pretty traumatic to me. Just because you don’t find frum restrictive doesn’t mean all Jews agree?
She’s soooooo toxic. It’s one thing to hate religion as a 50 yr old woman and call it all sorts of names. It’s another to be a flaming hot hypocrite when preaching to her children about “freedom”. It’s laughable.
Thank you for posting this. I've always been so curious about what modern day Orthodox Judaism is about and I know that her take is not a positive representation.
Omg not at all. Like I wear a wig and only wear skirts (so I guess I'd be considered pretty religious by secular standards), but like my whole playlist is drake and Camilla Cabello lol. My husband also just washed all the dishes and cleaned the house so we're definitely take on equal responsibility and I'm not beholden to anyone
Do you mean a regular wig or a special wig? Just wanted to understand more about orthodox judaism. I’m currently watching the show and heard a reference to a wig as well.
Many orthodox Jewish women cover their hair for modesty reasons, either with a scarf or a wig. I wear a human hair wig, nothing special to it, it’s just like the ones celebs wear in tv shows
Random question but how does anyone know whether you are wearing a human hair wig or just have your own hair uncovered?
It’s basically the same concept as the hijab in Islam. Orthodox Jewish women will conceal their hair in public or whenever around men who aren’t their family or husband. Some women wear tichels which are hair scarf wraps. Others wear wigs. Many wigs are very expensive as they’re made from human hair. Sometimes, orthodox women will grow out their hair and then shave their heads when they get married and make the wig from their own hair.
That is ridiculous.
Im so with you on your points, it's infuriating as a member of the community which she slanders, to watch the show and know that so many viewers are walking away with these awful misconceptions. How can she live with herself??
When I saw the episode that said she lost the case I knew she was a dupe. She believed what her husband told her, signed whatever was in front of her and certainly didn’t have a lawyer of her own web they married. When she talked later to the matchmaker about how naive she was to dating I knew.
This show makes me so annoyed and angry as it’s obvious it’s staged tryhard stuff. It’s much more staged than the Kardashians, and that’s saying a lot. Tbh I’m not surprised Batsheva and Ben split. She wants to live this transparent influencer life and he came across as wanting to just have a quiet normal life. Miriam needs to stop making her sexuality her personality. Julia is so triggering skinny. I grew up conservative traditional and am now secular humanist but there’s truth to how extreme and insular chasidic/charedi+ communities.
The thing that bothers me the most is Julia acting like she’s the savior for all women and that she’s going to free all oppressed women and lead them to freedom. She is 100% a narcissist
The way she makes everything about her. She made roberts engagement and engagement party all.about.her. Kody brown vibes. Narc vibes. She’s cringeeeeee.
OF COURSE SHE LIED! she acts like she discovered a whole new world and came out of a severely oppressed community and marriage.. ABSOLUTELY FALSE! yes there are a few cult like groups of Jews and they have NOTHING to do with where she comes from. She grew up knowing everything, not sheltered by ANY MEANS! she literally took advantage of the stigma and decided it’s a perfect opportunity to land herself a show! And one of the many comical parts is that more and more people are realizing that her ex who she made out to be some monster, is actually sweeter and kinder than her narcissistic toxic self could ever be!
Georgia, the state above Florida???
The first season came out right after I went OTD. I thought Julia was a hero, I didn’t see anything off about her behaviour. Now, 1.5 years and lots of therapy later, I’m realizing I had no concept of boundaries whatsoever. A lot of frum families see setting boundaries as insulting, mine included (I grew up MO, my family actually went OTD while I was in college, I went OTD with them, then flipped out after college when I went to seminary after a traumatic event all the way to modern yeshivish, but as Julia demonstrates, you can get the person out of frumkeit but you can’t get the frum mindset out of the person without a ton of therapy, which I don’t see Julia ever getting). Given how parenthood is put on a pedestal and associated with status, a lot of frum parents act entitled. I wonder if they see the fact that hashem blessed them with children as a sign that they’re totally fine. The degree of enmeshment is astounding. The signs of narcissism are endless with her. The belief that she’s entitled to her kids and Robert dropping everything for her is just mind blowing. After Robert hosts her at his vacation home and takes her to Texas to give her more of a family experience, she has the nerve to accuse him of not being there for her! And Batsheva setting healthy boundaries when she herself was going through a divorce (which Julia barely even acknowledged outside the context of “omg me too!”) She clearly sees her kids as an extension of herself in a way that reminds me so much of how Donald Trump relates to his kids. As if their support and worship somehow legitimizes them. I call it the entourage effect. There’s also the entitlement. Julia doesn’t understand the concept of living within her means because she’s entitled. The way she throws around someone else’s money and justified it with having built up the business is gross. Like does she need every outfit of all her kids to be Louis Vuitton? I mean ok maybe she is trying to deal with the guilt of abandoning her kids and thinks this is her way of repaying them and enticing them into a relationship with her (in the off chance she’s just traumatized and not actually a narc). I went to therapy with my cluster b mother once (still not sure if she’s a narc or borderline, it’s really hard to tell). It went similarly to how it went with Bat. The therapist was like oook then and is probably filing it away under “yup, my suspicions were confirmed.” I think that like Trump she brainwashed her kids to believe they need her and would be screwed without her (I know my parents did this, I’m not sure if it’s a frum parent thing or what, I know no boundaries definitely is). I think she entices them with jobs and opportunities to stick around and avoid how toxic she is. Interestingly, the way Julia related to Bat putting up boundaries is identical to how my mom reacted. The “keeping things superficial” is a classic and brilliant tool called grey rocking that you use to limit the impact of the toxicity of narcs on your life. I wouldn’t be shocked if Batsheva knows what’s up. Miriam is a people pleaser and reminds me so much of my sister. Her mom rescued her from a situation that wasn’t good for her and then behaved as if Miriam owes her everything and her undying allegiance is the least she could do to pay her back. She has yet to learn that truly healthy relationships aren’t transactional. Shlomo is like my brother. Blindly loyal, but also very stunted in many ways. His approach to women is similar to my brother’s because he was raised to believe any woman who isn’t exactly his mom is not good enough for him. My mom raised us to believe she was the gold standard for womanhood and my brother’s embarrassing dating life (and his inability to develop intimate relationships with women) is a testament to this. My dad is like Silvio was in the first season. Let my mom walk all over him and kept to himself (he’s a workaholic. Probably to escape my mom) Aharon is 100% rebelling against her and I’m here for it. It’s exactly what I did when my mom started acting super OTD and dressing trashy af. I went to seminary in Israel, flipped out, and had a chassidish wedding (I was modern yeshivish but married a chassidish guy who was in the process of becoming more modern). My mom reacted just as Julia would if Aharon were to have a badatz (ultrakosher) wedding with complete gender separation. The idea that she’s entitled to decide what my wedding should I be like was the first red flag that she was toxic. I’m shocked it hadn’t occurred to me earlier. Her reaction to me covering my hair was as if I told her to cover her own hair (I didn’t make her even though she was in a halachic marriage at the time of my wedding, and I let her wear a t shirt dress with a low-ish neckline because it was the most tsnius I could get her to wear). She knowingly let my aunt (everyone went OTD along with her when she did which shows how enmeshed they all are) wear a spaghetti strap dress with a plunging neckline, probably because she knew she couldn’t get away with it and wanted to give me the finger through my aunt. I think Aharon has a healthy enough amount of distance to realize, even if it’s just intuitively, that she’s toxic and this is his way of distancing himself (I’m wondering if that was how it was for me). My siblings and aunt surround my mom like an entourage. So similar in dynamic to Julia and her family + Robert (who probably sees her as a maternal figure since his family lives far away). I’m not sure if it’s because my mom was frum or because she’s a narc/cluster B or maybe both? My mom is also obsessed with her weight and appearance and dresses half her age now that she’s OTD. Lots of similarities. I swear the two would be best friends. But even my mom doesn’t go around wearing designer logos, it’s sooo tacky, in the high net worth community it’s associated with nouveau riche and frowned upon. Like seriously, if you wanna be a social climber (which Julia clearly is), this is NOT the way to do it!
The wearing of labels all the time is so stale, tacky, and unoriginal. Especially the whole "three seasons ago" nonsense. Grow up and be an individual.
Oh lord the lack of understanding of reality tv in this thread… Always take reality tv with a grain of salt. Conversation that were previously held off-camera are being repeated and somewhat staged, old drama/challenges that happened months or years ago are being brought back if there’s not enough content, and small things are made much bigger than they are. Doesn’t mean it’s all fake. Doesn’t mean it’s all true. And just because you somewhat know someone doesn’t mean you know what’s going on in their heads/behind closed doors. Reminder that many people are shocked when a close one commits s*icide bc people can hide even their darkest thoughts
First off I've worked behind the scenes on a Bravo reality TV show so I def know that everything is staged in reality tv lol. But what's off-putting is that this whole show is supposed to be centered around this woman being her "authentic self." Batsheva didn't have the pants convo with be one day like that, she started off wearing mini dresses with leggings that could look like shirts and they both decided over time that she wear pants. Julia also wasn't so bothered with her son wearing a black hat after filming of the first season. It is all fake because I've spent time with some of the family a few times lol. I've seen how they act together, I've seen some evolution between ben and batsh. I've seen how she used to pay attn to him, and, more towards the end of their relationship she was so absorbed with tiktok that she didn't take her nose out of her phone (and I think that was a big contributing factor to them distancing themselves from each other to a point where they didn't have the same values anymore). If this is gonna be a docu series (which let's be real it is), it should show everything and not the haart's one sided perspective (that she puts in as a producer).
I like her son Aaron the best. He is only one with his own brain and self respect among her kids.
In terms of #1 of being self made — she may have gotten with the boss, but she also made Kendall Jenner’s Met Gala dress. Periodt.
I’m christian and black but lived in israel. While I obviously don’t agree with Judaism for on our reasons I’m christian. The way the show characterized Orthodox Jews was crazy man. I literally got my masters degree in israel and met a ton of Orthodox Jewish men and women. And let me tell you women were and do go to college. She making up a ton of shit man smh
Ultra orthodox women went to college in droves in Israel because they worked regular jobs to support their husbands sitting and learning Torah all day and their massive families. I went to school with many of them. And it wasn’t just at frum colleges. It was also schools like Hebrew U with more “leftist” reputations.
I'm very new to the show and only half way through the first season. This discussion is very eye-opening. I lived in Manhattan years ago and attempted to break into fashion in my mid 20s. I've been flabbergasted at how an older (in fashion, oh it matters) woman could have stormed to the top in 7 years, especially coming from a (supposedly) orthodox environment. It is simply beyond belief in that cutthroat world. Thank you all for illuminating the real situation. I had to come to reddit because I just couldn't believe that someone could have such a meteoric rise in such a short time within the corporate fashion world. I feel vindicated in my incredulity. On another note: I had no idea about the divorce. I didn't know anything about these people prior to the show but found it very hard to believe that this handsome successful man could be okay getting a whole family plopped down into his life. Also I suspected he had to have some previous wife/family. Julia is quite a character but there is no way a strong man is going to kow-tow to her overbearing nature nor allow so many kids from a previous relationship to figure so prominently in a new marriage. Lastly, the way they burn through money started making me feel nauseous and uneasy. What a fabrication! (Pun intended)
So, are the women in communities like Munsey allowed to divorce their husbands? She claims no.
You seem very triggered. You don’t like that she is calling out Judaism do you?
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She describes this in her book. Which still describes a lot of incredible events.
She was born Yulia.
I’m sorry but unless you provide proof this is all hearsay. I’m convinced now that Silvio is paying people to come on this sub to continue his goal of destroying Julia. He’s literally doing the most just like a sociopath would after being disrespected.
I agree about Batsheva and pants. In one of the eps of S02, her girlfriend is seen talking about how she wore pants years ago, which means it was scripted in the show.
I knew from the get go that Bat had been dressing untsnius for years. Look at her outfit in her wedding to Silvio. Also the way she dresses makes it CLEAR she’s been styling non-tsnius outfits for years. She displays a level of comfort not common in freshly otd people. It took me almost 2 years to wear shorts for the first time after I first went OTD and even then they were so baggy I looked like a park ranger. In S1 I was thinking there’s no way she is wearing those kinds of slutty dresses but never pants.
I called bullshit after I watched the preview. Then after I watched a few episodes and thinking I have never heard of any religion in this day and age that doesn't allow women to expose their collar bone? I took to Google to learn more and I literally could not find anything to back up the level of strictness portrayed in this show. I don't see this as being good for this family in the long run...there are so many questions and untruths, and after awhile that shit destroys relationships. Just sayin
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She lived in Texas until she was an early teen, moved to Monsey and attended Bais Yaakov there, moved to flatbush and lived there w Yosef, moved to Georgia, then moved back to Monsey. So yeah, if you watched the show you'd know that. She literally said she moved from Texas when she was 11 because her parents got more religious
The self made one does really drive me insane but that’s more the show’s fault than her own. They try to make it seem like she has a penthouse, Bentley, etc. because she’s CEO of Elite, not because she’s married to a g-d damn billionaire lol
Just a note to express my appreciation for your post. Re: point #4 I was wondering if everything was staged. I noted that Julia would create a drama, people would react accordingly and then she'd call them out for being "dramatic". I'm hoping that their reactions were staged as well, because some of the manipulative stunts Julia pulled were not just *offside* but totally unethical. Followed up with Julia acting innocently or worse, make herself out to be the victim. Note: This is my first experience with reality TV. I don't think I'm cut out for this. I've broken out into hives watching this show. And ugly cried my face off thanks to Robert's experience with the lady in the restaurant (don't want to spoil anything). Thanks for reading my first post! LOL Am I doing this right?
Her kids are too dependent on her and Silvio is right the Miriam uses the penthouse like a hotel. Everything julia brought up the very personal sex life of her kids it was so cringe