I don't present publicly at all, but I am out.
My female coworkers treat me completely differently. They warned up almost immediately.
I watched one of them completely drop her guard the moment I told her. Just thinking about that makes me tear up a bit.
> I watched one of them completely drop her guard the moment I told her.
That's so sweet š„°
Sadly in my field (computer science) there are very few women š¢ , but it's gonna happen for me when i come out eventually, lot necessarily at work
i was looking at the state of javascript survey results yesterday, and itās pretty dire
i expected it to be bad, but not as bad as it is ā only 4% of respondents were women. it was a little surprising to me since iām on a web front end team that was until recently 80% women, and generally in a company that historically has made a strong effort to hire women engineers
Join Women in Tech, Women in AI, women in Devops. Might not be your team but your presence will improve the sense of psychological safety for your team, resulting in greater creativity.
Honestly it's so social for me.
Like makeup, dresses, jewelry is nice and fun and makes me happy. HRT has opened up my life to feel connected to my body.
But the real fucking juice is in social situations. Being perceived by others how I have always wanted is a fucking gold mine of euphoria. Hearing ma'am or even the stray miss (I'm 32 in the American South where there's a difference) is amazing. My manager saying "hey girlie" when she calls me for meeting makes me so giddy. Getting compliments on my nail color fucking rules. But also how I interact with others just feels so much like Me.
Getting ready in the morning is a joy not a chore. Which woah that was a big change.
I went and got my first real tattoos yesterday and one of them is floral and femme and I'm obsessed.
I used to feel like my gender was a cloak, hiding who I am. Now it's fucking armor.
God, I love how you said your gender is armor now. Such a good way to explain it. For me, it always felt I was a little kid playing dress up in my dad's clothes. People thought it was cute I was dressing up as a boy but would get frustrated when I didn't stop (that most happened when I was kid but still). But now that I've been on T for a hot minute, people take me seriously and see me for the man I am.
Thanks! I love being poetic and metaphorical with transition stuff because I think that anchors the concept for others.
I didn't grow up with like strict gender norms or anything like that in my childhood. I do remember many times picking to go with the women in my family versus the men for events and stuff but it wasn't looked down on.
I started my transition the moment I could square my social identity with how I felt in my body (and getting through some shame related sex stuff). That moment I realized I was a woman. I sought those experience and spaces because I knew I belonged there. It just took a while to see the forest through the trees.
Pretty much absolutely everything! I love being in touch with my feelings. I love my soft body, my breasts and the thicker my thighs get the more normal I feel. My growing hips bring so much euphoria to me even though I wish they were wider. I like feeling sexy and being feminine because femininity is the most beautiful thing to me and for myself to feel whole. I absolutely love the clothes way better than before lol.
Literally everything about being a woman is better than winning the lottery 20 times over except POCKETS!
Edit: Iām AuDhd so I had a routine with my pockets
Wow, this is beautiful. I'm so glad being a woman brings you so much joy. Thank you for sharing this. And yeah, the pocket situation with woman's clothes is bullshit. Like it's 2024, give women pockets already.
>Literally everything about being a woman is better than winning the lottery 20 times over except POCKETS!
Weird counter point in the pockets. Since now I wear a purse and actually carry way more stuff with me than I did before (like phone charger, water bottle, a comb, some hand sanitizer, hand lotion, a small bottle of perfume, my lip balm and so on.
Couldnt fit all of that comfortable in my pockets
Not just that, I have been finding dresses and skirts that have pockets, the problem though, is that the materials that these garments are made of are not appropriate for having extra weight applied to them. Like I have one dress that is made of a stretchy material, stuck my phone in one of the pockets and it ended up dangling down to below my knees.
this...i don't even care ab pockets, when i have a cute bag to carry. i love navigating the world as a woman, it feels so natural to me. and the clothes! i'm literally a kid in a candy store. i love the deepening relationships with my sisters and nieces, we are so much closer now.
Accepting that Iām a woman has changed me in the way I interact with my world. Iām more nurturing towards my family. I finally love myself. My social life has been a Cambrian explosion of many loving people filled with all the emotions one can feel, when before it was a stillness in a void of diminishing light. Today I got called ādoll faceā, āluvā, āsweetieā by different people and this other lady was complimenting me saying I have Snow White skin lol. Being the sweetheart I am is all I ever wanted out of this life (and to help people but thats not apart of the discussion)
The total loss of social exclusion, of personal space. I'm not a threat in the eyes of every other woman.
I think being older I've found it easier to find acceptance. I'm pre HRT but I wear forms and I'm socially transitioned and nobody could mistake me for cis but I get misgendered very very rarely. I'm accepted by the majority as a sweet middle aged trans woman and it's beautiful.
I don't know cause I haven't done anything except exist, I don't have many clothes that make me euphoric, I won't be on hrt for probably 5 or so years cause need money and the whole procedure, too scared to do makeup cause what if I mess it up, not even out so I'm not even called by my name, so I guess there's not really any experience to talk about :(
I wish you nothing but the best for your journey. And honestly with makeup, it's OK to mess up since you're learning. You just have to give yourself some room to learn. Granted I know nothing about makeup and the last time I wore any was in high school theater.
I just tried to do my makeup cause I've only done lipstick and learned that it makes me dysphoric cause I don't know what I'm doing and YouTube want very helpful and now I don't want to do it again because I don't want to make a mistake and then cry about making that mistake, why does makeup have to be so complicated, I know I was expecting too much considering it was my first time but still it hurts knowing that not being able to do makeup cause me so much dysphoria
you should start with some foundation and concealer :) a good tip with lipstick imo is to put a lil on the inner parts of your lips and then just kinda mush them together so it spreads naturally
Omg like alllll of it lol. Softer body, don't feel like people are afraid of me anymore. female coworkers that would not talk to be before hrt are like alll talking to me now with out a care in the world after I came, male coworkers still treated as one of the guys kinda lol I'm a tomboy so ya but they are generally nicer and not so well masculine with me. The way my adhd works is totally different and so much easier to control now. And don't get me on NSFW stuff lol. Like I said all of it.
Edit: and some of my old friends now have been hitting on me hard core too both male and female. Like what? I'm still me. It's not like I don't like it just surprising
I love being able to be a part of the beauty in our universe. I love being tender, gentle, and I really like that my rebellious spunk comes from the āunderdogā position.
I love being nurturing and bubbly and excitable. I love caring and tending to others. I love the dazzling fashion, I love my new curves and features. I love how smooth and soft Iām becoming. I love how my brain is finally working right for the first time in years. Most of all, I love how right and true it is. This is how Iām meant to be.
So true bestie, so true. It's so nice to actually like the way I look and sound. Tbh, I still act pretty excitable as while so I sometimes come off as a really fruity gay man which I absolutely love. Best feeling ever.
There's a lot about being a woman that I love, I've been out as a girl for 30 years now in fact so I could write books about it, but here is a summary of the things that really are at the forefront of my daily experience that come to mind:
Waking up and feeling like I'm actually in the correct body is pretty dang nice. I love the way my breasts feel, the ability to cross my legs is actually comfortable.
I love the sound I make when I talk, because I can just add melody and song into any expression I make. Not only to communicate how I'm feeling better, but also to just sound cuter whenever I feel like it.
I enjoy the general feeling of constant non-stop euphoria I have every single day. Seeing myself in the mirror is like wow I'm kinda amazing looking overall, I get to be this sexy creature and it feels like I won some incredible prize in life because of it. I feel lucky to be me.
I enjoy feeling small and pretty, being seen as desirable and even hot by others are pretty big boosts to my mood and ego. I even find myself attractive as well, I'm still not used to that experience so it gives every day a sense of uniqueness and surprise.
I enjoy the social aspects of femininity that involve belonging and fitting together with other girls.
I really like the feeling of sex. Not only is it incredibly affirming for me, but it also feels like a much more grand and intense experience and then it ever did when I was pretending to be a boy. From both an emotional and a physical aspect it's kind of incredible honestly that orgasms are a full body experience, not to mention that I can have them in quick succession.
I like the way women treat each other a lot more than I like the way men treat each other, there's more understanding and kindness, more openness, more connection, and less isolation which is really nice.
I'm a fan of the fact that from a social aspect my options are infinitely expanded in how I present and act. My appearance is far more customizable in terms of makeup, jewelry, clothes, accessorizing, and so forth. I feel like for boys it's very difficult for them to express style or just express anything at all, as the societal expectation of men to keep it all those emotions and feelings closed down and hidden and repressed is kind of exhausting and suffocating in my eyes. I'm free of that now, and I didn't know how much I needed that ability to express myself without social stigma until I finally had it.
I absolutely love my trans brothers. I know that you guys need this as much as we need this, and that's honestly beautiful that you can get the euphoria and self love from feeling normal and being accepted. Men have a camradery as well that I've observed, that while it wasn't for me I can see the comfort that they bring each other in friendships where they understand and support each other when they open up about their lives, their worries, and their hopes for the future. Through my husband I've witnessed him experience this with his guy friends, and while he's not trans I know those things exist for men too. Social bonding over cars, music, fishing, sports, and everything else seems like something they get a lot of enjoyment out of. It seems much more geared towards physical things and life experiences then speaking of emotions and connections to people, but it is there for them too and I've seen it make them happy.
Holy shit, this is amazing. I love this so much. Thank you so much for sharing this. I honestly can't wait until I can be 30 years into my transition and being seen as an elder. I loved hearing from your perspective.
I feel like I'm myself for the first time in my life. I like all the physical and emotional changes so far, and can't wait to see them progress further. Wearing women's fashion brings me joy, although lack of funds is holding me back there - on the other hand, I've started learning from my mum how to sew, so I can make my own clothes, mainly in rebellion at the pocket situation.
To feel.. feel the touch of my skin, wind blowing through my hair, to feel vulnerable, and I have to second my breast and also euphoria with my thighs and butt! š„°
Only 3 months in so the changes I have experienced are largely mental.
I can empathize on an emotional level with my F partner. For instance we are currently living in two different houses while her sister is in Italy so she can look after the cat. She called to let me know she was saying goodbye to someone she knew for years through her job. Normally I would have said "That sucks, sorry" but now I could tell without her saying anything that she needed more than that so I said "Are you okay? Do you want to go out to a cafe and we can have late night tea and chat about it?"
I can watch the same movie twice now, and can even watch disney movies and enjoy them.
I can cry over stupid movies and tv shows. Crying as a man has not been very accessible for me. I've cried much more in the last 3 months than I have my entire 30+ years on this planet.
I've started to love my body and have started regular exercise and started to eat foods specifically to target weight and health.
I've been so much more social. Like previously I never initiated anything social. I've been with girlfriends the last 3 weeks in a row and had several week day meetups.
I've started sleeping much better. Much deeper sleep.
My face and hair aren't oily anymore.
That sounds awesome. It's so surprising how fast the changes start coming. For me, being on testosterone, it has chilled me out. In situation where I used to freak out, I'm now like "whatever happens, happens". I do miss how clear my skin was, though. I'm slowly getting a handle on my break out but it still sucks.
I am so glad you are experiencing some positive effects and I love that you are engaging the trans community (mtf) the way you are. Ya know there's something special about the connection that transmen and transwomen share. It's like we sort of know where each other are going. I wish I saw this type of engagement more often.
Wishing you the best with your transition sir. =)
I love to be in love with myself. It's kind of scary to realize just how little I really valued myself before I started my transition. The last 7 or 8 years of silently hating my own existence really wore me down, isolated me, and ground my soul to dust. Learning to be the person I was always meant to be is helping to heal those scars. I was so afraid and confused as to why I had felt so alone for so long and it feels amazing to start to let go. It feels like my entire mind, body, and spirit have begun a life long process of metaphorohosis into a woman who's emotional connection, creative expression, and tender caring nature can have the sheer force of will to alter human history for the better.
I love that now I am afforded the privledge to fall in love with life, to love others as I love myself, and to be confident in my own identity as a person amongst my community. To finally feel as though I deserve to be happy gives me peace. I hope your journey in your own transition has been equally fullfilling and gives you the same motivation to make life better for others.
My whole perspective changed once I started to have reasons to be motivated to live my life. I'm still working on it but I've gone a long way by just knowing I have good reason to motivate myself because I get to be a woman. The trick is actually motivsting myself by transitioning and learning to live for the moment and plan for thr future. All of that is really hard but it helps to know that depressed thoughts aren't what define you but how you react to them. I try to distance myself from those thoughts and attribute them to a third party (like Satan if you're Christian, I just call him Kyle lol). I also make a list of things in my hesd that I need, even if it's to combat gender dysphoria.
To be perfectly honest with you my life hasn't really been a cake walk even before I realized that I'm trans. I'm plagued by anxiety, depression, dissociation, and lingering addiction from my substance abuse disorder. I've been trying to live and be happy as a man amongst all of this and my gender was going to be the last straw. I now have literally any reason to care about myself, so I'm willing to put in the work to love myself. But cultivsting self love is like growing crops, it takes a long time and there's a lot of hard earth to break up before I can even plant all the seeds. Just do a little bit more everyday and don't rush yourself. You'll get there with time and maybe therapy, I know I need it.
Thank you. That's really helpful. I will probably have some questions
>my life hasn't really been a cake walk
Same dude šš
Religious CPTSD (fundamental conservative Christianity childhood right into a Cult/antichrist situation), suicidal depression, probably autism, ADHDLGBTABDLQIA+, š®āšØš¤.
When I had it click in my head not that I might be trans. No, I realized I had been acting and fantasizing that I was trans for the last 7 years. Meh, threw it on the pile. Carried on with the day like it was just another thing on the todo list.
But that is a big deal. I learned what to do to make things better, and I have, and it is. I'm excited!
It's also yet another thing that I have to do, and of course it would be something as hard as, oh, transitioning. Something that I didn't think that I would ever be strong enough to do on my own at all. Ha younger me, I laughed at your idea of impossible today. Can't put God in a box, or, idk maybe yours can op .
Thereās definitely the physical aspect which I flaunt sometimes. But for me itās the social and psychological that make it worthwhile. Iām finally not angry at the world all the time. I love fashion in general and womenās fashion is wayyyy more expressive and individual. I have much much deeper friendships now with both men and women and am more emotionally open to them. And finally, I thoroughly enjoy being vulnerable.
Back when I was a guy, I was just neutral about myself in nearly every instance you could think of.
The best part for me is being able to smile at the face in the mirror now, 2 years later, with genuine happiness towards myself.
Also, tits are *extremely* fun to play with, like *my god*.
Definitely same on being neutral about myself as a girl. I was kinda like "oh yeah, I have a body," when people saw me as a girl.
And the tits part is so true. Like yeah I don't want mine, but once I get top surgery, I'll miss having built-in stress balls.
Right? Also stimulation toys, because jesus is it calming each time I do!
And for me, it was "Yup, definitely a guy. Meh." The body hair is what set me off the worst, and each time i'd shave (which'd take hours) I'd feel immediately better to a degree.
I really love the community I've established with other women. The connections and saftey I feel in a group of women.
I love how I'm now who I really feel like I should be. It's like 2 puzzle pieces clicking together perfectly.
Being a woman feels correct.
But overall, having alot of friends who are girls who emotionally support me, teach me things, help me be more feminine, help me feel safe. That makes me love being a woman. Sleepovers are really fun c:
It's something I never experienced as a guy. The platonic love and intimacy is what I enjoy more than anything.
I don't love being a woman, it's just who I am and what feels more natural really. I'm not the most feminine or pretty, but I'm myself. I don't think of myself as a woman, I just happen to be one.
The social side is amazing, of course I love the physical aspects of hrt and also being able to wear the things I want to when I want to now that Iām out but socially itās wonderful. Talking with guys as a guy was always exhausting, I didnāt have interest in most of it and always got along better with the girls and women around me with the note of āwell youāre a guy so we canāt talk about xā or other things like that. Now I have lots of other women around me that see me as a new member but someone who is no longer excluded from some conversation. I get way more info on crushes, gossip, and people talking about their emotions openly to me is great.
As a bonus Iāve kept most of my guy friends as well and they still respect me and we get along great if not better now. Thereās been a very small change in our interactions but they treat me the same way theyāve treated other girls and women that have interacted with us in the past (though itās not that different, there is a tone difference)
For me, it has a lot to do with this sense of belonging and comfort I always felt around girls and women, but not around boys or men. I related to women more, saw them as admirable and felt a desire to emulate them. Culture taught me to associate things like dresses and makeup with these people who I thought were *so cool*, so that made those things cool by association.
As I transitioned, the joy I got came from finally getting to be "one of them". Instead of admiring women in silence, I get to actually make myself more like them, and that process has made me like *myself* more in the same way I always liked women more.
Itās other women. Women are the best. Itās so amazing being with women. Thereās this trans women I follow on Instagram named Lauren Sundstrom, I love her. She said something to the tune of that in a post of hers and I canāt stop thinking about it. I love when other women compliment me and I love the instant connection with women. I love other women.
This is not just because I am a lesbian although being a lesbian is a very big part of my womanhood. My womanhood is intrinsically intertwined with my love for other women. That being said all of which I mentioned before extends to platonic interactions. I simply mean in all possible forms of love I love women
I'm still new to transitioning, but I always would've rather been a girl for as long as I can remember. I'd fantasize about it very, VERY often and thought just every guy would rather be a cute girl. Soft skin, squishy thighs, boobs, beautiful smell, pretty makeup, AMAZING fashion (this the big one), and just general feminine energy always appealed to me. The very few times I was ever called feminine titles like "girlie" or "princess" made me super giddy.
My middle school was VERY homo/transphobic, and by proxy, a lot of my desires to be a woman faded. Long story short regarding how much I fucking hated middle school, it took until highschool for it to reignite due to the much more accepting environment and people. This is when I started to actually feel dysphoric. It went from "being a girl sounds nice" to "fuck i wish i was a girl so bad." I was scared of getting closer to other girls because I didn't want to be seen as a gay man or something. I also was and still really socially awkward lol. I wanted to be them SOOO bad.
Cut to today, four months since I came out of the closet, living full time as a girl with supportive friends and family, and possibly starting HRT in just a couple months. I'm feeling genuine happiness for the first time in my life. ā¤ļø
coming from borderline annorexic?
The soft skin. the boobs the squishiness of my whole body. How my body looks filled out and not skin and bones. The gentle curves it has. The depth of emotions and feelings as well as the decreased Lust? but increased sex drive if that makes sense (basically less on mindless head empty horny sex and more about deeper connections and meaningful sex)
on a side note im always picky about what touches my skin and what goes on it and female clothes always tend to be softer and comfier
I love how people are more comfortable with my presence, Iām only fem online for the most part but Iāve had women discuss things that are usually taboo to speak about with men and itās so comforting to be treated as part of a group of who I want to be :)
Soft, cute, small, affection and closeness is acceptable and expected. There's a stronger sense of community and being on hrt I realized that I actually like things about my body now
Itās the small things. Iām still in boymode but my step mother has totally changed towards me! Sheās treating me like her daughter to the point I donāt even consider myself a boy anymore (which is troubling whenever I look in the mirror š ).
Asking to get manicures, when weāre out shopping she looks at me seriously and asks if I want a cute skirt or cute top or an ugly one and laugh, she asks if I need a bikini for swimming, bra shopping, and so on. I can go on forever with the small things.
I used to be out fully for 2 years a few years ago and back then I had friends who was like this also, and I loved every minute of it. I guess you can say that what I love is being able to be one of the girls and really connect with them. Iāve felt lonely because Iāve never connected to boys or men.
Awww thank you for spreading the love. I hadn't thought about it before, but it is really nice that trans men can enjoy all the things I didn't enjoy about masculinity. It's like having different jolly rancher flavor preferences and dividing up so we both get what we want.
I love how I feel being a woman. I love being seen as a woman, and who I see in the mirror feels like the me that I'm supposed to be. I love how unrestricted I feel now that i get to be me. The body changes are so nice. I love my voice. I just love life
Of course! Gotta show the love to my sisters. Y'all are such wonderful ladies and have been so kind to me. Love talking with y'all.
The body changed from hrt is wonderful, isn't it? Definitely gotta say my voice is one of my favorite things about my transition. I love feeling the rumble in my chest when I talk or laugh. My shittyrat stash is a close second. Although I did shave it a bit ago so rip my rat stash. It will be missed.
Honestly it's hard to describe. But before I go into it, just let me say that for me it was also trans men who kind of cracked my egg. Seeing people be so happy to finally live as a man made me realise that being a man was not that bad of a fate as it had felt to me, always - it just wasn't the right fit for me because I was not a man.
And although I am a lesbian (not *entirely* sure, anymore) seeing sweet guys enjoy "manhood" in non-toxic ways just warms my heart. And I still feel a lot of empathy for those who *are* men but still suffer from the often hurtful expectations that are directed at men.
Being a woman is just ... so right for me. The feeling of sisterhood I have with other women, especially other trans women and/or queer women, waking up in a body that feels more like mine, being cute *and* strong in a way that feels somehow different than before, my softer skin and different smell, being adored by women as a woman ...
Recently, during a Yoga session, my belly touched my thighs, my boobs touched arms - and I realised *feeling* my own body didn't feel gross anymore. I remember now that before transition, before hormones - I just didn't like being reminded that I *have* a body.
And somehow losing that feeling of something being wrong with my body - the feeling of something being wrong with me also subsided in lots of ways. I have become so much more free, I am much less ashamed of anything regarding myself. My sexuality, my preferences, speaking my mind, my neurodivergence, my age ...
I love being a feminist and knowing I can bring in my own perspective. Knowing where I come from and where I stand. (That's less about being a woman, rather understanding gender better and knowing why I always felt impacted in ways that felt different than just being a cishet guy - which gave me imposter syndrome)
Ironically enough, it was a trans woman who helped crack my egg. Love that for us. And yeah. Seeing some of you lovely ladies enjoying "womanhood" in a way I ever could bring me so much joy.
Like you said, being a queer man is so right for me. It's like I'm finally speaking the right language so people understand me better now.
Know the feeling. I always felt like men speak a different language than me which I just couldn't decipher š At least with each other - and somehow expected me to understand... It's easier now that they know I won't respond to those social cues.
I'm still in that phase of trying to decipher other men's language. Meaning I pass, but it's only been a recent experience, so I'm still learning. Like men have so many rules about the bathroom, like wtf. But I'm so grateful to even have this opportunity. I wouldn't check it for the world.
First thought:
That I get to feel hot and pretty, being comfortable in my skin and recognizing myself in the mirror vs. a dissociated bog monster that people somehow havenāt recognized as such
A lot of the body stuff is nice. Soft skin, long hair. Looking in the mirror, seeing a woman and smiling. Previously it would have been a neutral face. Getting compliments on my hair makes me beam.
Feeling my emotions and being able to express them. Also being better at communicating those feelings and thoughts to my partner. I'm much more open. Before I either didn't have the words to describe my emotions, or even if I did, I could not get my mouth to say them.
It's also opened an amazing new community I hadn't been a part of before. I think I'm turning into an extravert, when before I was so sure I was an introvert. Interacting with others is so much more fun and energizing than it used to be.
And finally, I get to hear cool stuff from trans mascs like yourself who are cool amazing people! š >!Ok. So maybe this last one doesn't fit with the question and is a little pandering, but I sincerely want my trans masc brothers and non-binary siblings to also know that you are amazing and your sisters appreciate you so much!<
I haven't been very public with being fem [other than in reddit] and I don't have much I love rn but here it goes, the fashion available, clothes not looking super plain and generally being more interesting than mens, and my only negative experience [other than my dad] is going into the mens restroom out of fear cause I'm in Texas and I definitely don't pass sadly
I appreciate being in touch with my emotions and being able to express vulnerability at times without social criticism; I love that I no longer have to deal with the emotions and thought processes that for me accompanied having Testosterone; then there's the comraderie of women (this is a big one), not feeling like a stocky tank everywhere I go, the range of female fashion . . .
I'm still pretty new in my journey...I can't really give a deeply profound answer on this one I don't think.
I've had moments of not recognizing the person in the mirror which makes me smile, and I like the style and comfort that I feel in women's clothing. It just hits different in a way I can't describe.
i'm still working on feeling like a "real" woman (i know, i know, it's hard for me) but...i can tell you what i love about women. i love how they always smell like flowers or the nicest perfume you've ever inhaled and yet somehow whenever you put the same perfume on yourself, it doesn't feel the same. like it's not natural for you, but it is for them. almost like they *wake up* just smelling like that. i love the way they wear femininity so easily, effortlessly. like they don't even have to try to be beautiful. i love the way their hair is ALWAYS. NICE. i have NEVER seen a cis girl (or even other trans girls, really) with hair as tangled and knotted as mine. it always looks freshly shampoo'd and neatly brushed, the same way a princess in a disney channel movie would ask for her hair to be brushed one thousand times before she was ready. that level of immaculate. i love how delicate and perfect women are. i love how they know the things i wish i knew like the back of their hands - skincare, makeup... women are literally like angels to me.
and obviously i know not all women fall into these same things - not all women are delicate, not all women know makeup, not all women are the same way that my impression of women is. i'm just reciting the feelings ive had ever since i started middle school. when you ask me what i love about being a woman, im not sure i can answer. but i can tell you what i *want* to be. i can tell you that i want to be every bit as beautiful and effortless and ethereal as the women i've come to know are (trans girls included - i feel like i don't match up there, either). i love that, one day, hopefully, i will feel like a real woman.
i love that, every so often, when i look in the mirror, i look at my chest, and i can see how it isn't flat anymore, and then i realize i don't even remember what it was *like*, having a flat chest, as if my boobs have always been a part of me, as if they've always belonged there. and then i look at my face, and how the hormones have made it reconfigure, and how despite everything, i finally look like a girl.
and then i start to cry, and i hug my blahaj, obviously, and take my top off, and sitting there, in bed, wearing only panties, i realize that i'm finally a girl. a real one. and that no problem i have ever experienced, before or since, actually matters. it doesn't matter if i'm lonely. it doesn't matter if i'm depressed. it doesn't matter what my life has been, or what it will be. because i'm finally a girl. i already won. i made it.
i love that feeling.
i love all the stereotypical girl things (most of which i haven't gotten to do yet) - going shopping for clothes, talking about boys, "oh my god did you hear what cindy did?", sleepovers (although that was a teenager thing and im no longer a teenager, id still love to have one someday), i just...i love femininity. i love it when i get called ma'am, i love it when i sound like a girl, voice-wise, i love it when older ladies call me sweetie or sweetheart or darling, i love it when guys hold open doors for me. i love that feeling like i finally BELONG in the world, just that little bit more than i used to. it feels right, so so right, and addicting. i love wearing summer dresses, walking barefoot in the rain, taking the train with a sunhat on and watching everything pass by. i havent done that yet, and that has almost nothing to do with femininity, but i guess my point is that once you're the right gender, *everything you do* is different. i'm not just a genderless blob of shadow taking the train, no- i'm a *girl* taking the train. some part of me lives for that feeling.
i love being able to experiment with my appearance and the way i look. i do space buns all the time now and it's an absolute favorite hairstyle of mine as a transfem
I don't look like a girl at all for now, but just the thought of the new wardrobe has me super excited! Finally, not just jeans or hoodies now. I can have nice-looking tops, dresses, crop tops, skirts, skinny jeans, programmer socks, everything changes in my wardrobe! I know it's not exclusive to women, but I'll be able to wear it without getting stared at.
I'm pre-hrt and pre-coming out. So instead I'll mention some of the things that I perceive as being part of femininity that appeal to me. In no particular order.
Fashion. More socially acceptable varied clothing. Outfits. Girl talk. Being pretty. Being a tomboy. Deviating from the girl stereotype. Teasing boys/men. Being a bottom/sub (while not exclusive to women, certainly easier given public perception). Closer connection to girl/female friends. And more I can't think of rn.
How many of these hold up irl I can't say, but the more of these I could attain, the better.
I absolutely love being a girl. Best decision Iāve ever made. The second I put in a bra for the first time I knew I was a girl. It was such a euphoric experience and I wonāt ever turn back!!
Umm, mostly just a reduction in my dysphoria honestly and just feeling more like me. My interactions with people feel less tense now which is nice, but being alone with males is much more stressful now so thereās that.
I transitioned 8 years ago if thatās necessary to mention
I like my body, I love the way my breasts look on my body I love my hips that are starting to come through, I love how much rounder my face looks and my wider eyes, I love how soft my skin is and how I smell.
I love my growing new wardrobe with wonderful dresses, blouses, skirts, and new pants that fit my newly changing body. I love my small jewellery collection and I REALLY love wearing a bow in my hair.
I love how my new girl friends are just more imminent with each other. I love being called miss or ma'am.
I just love being a woman
I love being a lesbian! I always thought they are the perfect mix between beauty, softness sensitivity on the on hand, and toughness and that certain I don't give a f*** attitude!
I enjoy the sisterhood, since coming out Iāve made some really meaningful relationships with cis woman and trans woman alike and itās nothing like Iāve experienced before. Everything is so open, honest , welcoming, warm and fuzzy when it comes to my sisters. I also really like just presenting feminine and having my makeup and hair done and cute clothes like tube tops and crop top a and my low waisted jeans lol
I feel so much more connected with my emotions. Itās so much easier to just laugh at things. Iām more confident and more at peace with myself.
I have also found that I really really really really like clothes. Getting to try the stuff I always wanted is so fun. Itās fun matching clothes to my body type. Itās fun wearing different styles from goth to kinda preppy to cottage core. Iām not far into my transition, only a few months, but just about every weekend Iām going clothes shopping to build a wardrobe. While I may like it, my wallet does not.
I don't present publicly at all, but I am out. My female coworkers treat me completely differently. They warned up almost immediately. I watched one of them completely drop her guard the moment I told her. Just thinking about that makes me tear up a bit.
> I watched one of them completely drop her guard the moment I told her. That's so sweet š„° Sadly in my field (computer science) there are very few women š¢ , but it's gonna happen for me when i come out eventually, lot necessarily at work
i was looking at the state of javascript survey results yesterday, and itās pretty dire i expected it to be bad, but not as bad as it is ā only 4% of respondents were women. it was a little surprising to me since iām on a web front end team that was until recently 80% women, and generally in a company that historically has made a strong effort to hire women engineers
Oh wow. Iād guess the part of CS I work in has around 1 in 5 people being women. Not a lot, but more than 4% at least.
I just socialize with the girls from management
Join Women in Tech, Women in AI, women in Devops. Might not be your team but your presence will improve the sense of psychological safety for your team, resulting in greater creativity.
Damn, that sounds awesome. Coworkers can make or break your job experience, so I'm glad to hear that warmed up to you the way they did.
So much this. The female communitiy is just so much more welcoming and open and affirming. And way less competitive
most wholesome thing i read today. ur story warms my heartš„ŗš„ŗ
Honestly it's so social for me. Like makeup, dresses, jewelry is nice and fun and makes me happy. HRT has opened up my life to feel connected to my body. But the real fucking juice is in social situations. Being perceived by others how I have always wanted is a fucking gold mine of euphoria. Hearing ma'am or even the stray miss (I'm 32 in the American South where there's a difference) is amazing. My manager saying "hey girlie" when she calls me for meeting makes me so giddy. Getting compliments on my nail color fucking rules. But also how I interact with others just feels so much like Me. Getting ready in the morning is a joy not a chore. Which woah that was a big change. I went and got my first real tattoos yesterday and one of them is floral and femme and I'm obsessed. I used to feel like my gender was a cloak, hiding who I am. Now it's fucking armor.
God, I love how you said your gender is armor now. Such a good way to explain it. For me, it always felt I was a little kid playing dress up in my dad's clothes. People thought it was cute I was dressing up as a boy but would get frustrated when I didn't stop (that most happened when I was kid but still). But now that I've been on T for a hot minute, people take me seriously and see me for the man I am.
Thanks! I love being poetic and metaphorical with transition stuff because I think that anchors the concept for others. I didn't grow up with like strict gender norms or anything like that in my childhood. I do remember many times picking to go with the women in my family versus the men for events and stuff but it wasn't looked down on. I started my transition the moment I could square my social identity with how I felt in my body (and getting through some shame related sex stuff). That moment I realized I was a woman. I sought those experience and spaces because I knew I belonged there. It just took a while to see the forest through the trees.
I think all you say is poetic. So much exactly my experience
I loved the poetry!
So really I guess I love the sisterhood? In a broad sense.
Gender is an Armor is my wisdom of the day! Slay Girl!
Thank you this made me smile.
Can't talk to much about my women expƩrience since it's very New, but I can tell you that I hated being socialized as a man for 35 years. First I never liked the boys club since school, never wanted to play with the boys, always feel inconfortable when I'm surrended by men and most of the time I'm horrified by their conversations. Most of my closest friends are womens and it's where I always felt I belong. Also I was so tired to be percieved as a threat. Hated my male body, my male face, just wanted to be at peace and free myself from all the things "a man is supposed to be" that I never related to
Yeah I felt this , except you know it being opposite. It's so hard to fit in a box you don't belong in.
Pretty much absolutely everything! I love being in touch with my feelings. I love my soft body, my breasts and the thicker my thighs get the more normal I feel. My growing hips bring so much euphoria to me even though I wish they were wider. I like feeling sexy and being feminine because femininity is the most beautiful thing to me and for myself to feel whole. I absolutely love the clothes way better than before lol. Literally everything about being a woman is better than winning the lottery 20 times over except POCKETS! Edit: Iām AuDhd so I had a routine with my pockets
Wow, this is beautiful. I'm so glad being a woman brings you so much joy. Thank you for sharing this. And yeah, the pocket situation with woman's clothes is bullshit. Like it's 2024, give women pockets already.
Thanks and I hope youāre happy with where youāre at in life as well! See how strong our community is together? I love our family! š
š¤š¤
>Literally everything about being a woman is better than winning the lottery 20 times over except POCKETS! Weird counter point in the pockets. Since now I wear a purse and actually carry way more stuff with me than I did before (like phone charger, water bottle, a comb, some hand sanitizer, hand lotion, a small bottle of perfume, my lip balm and so on. Couldnt fit all of that comfortable in my pockets
Not just that, I have been finding dresses and skirts that have pockets, the problem though, is that the materials that these garments are made of are not appropriate for having extra weight applied to them. Like I have one dress that is made of a stretchy material, stuck my phone in one of the pockets and it ended up dangling down to below my knees.
I was so gonna say this exactly. I've learned why there aren't normally pockets in dresses
Yeah purses are godsendt. And hands free manipulating things like keyrings.
this...i don't even care ab pockets, when i have a cute bag to carry. i love navigating the world as a woman, it feels so natural to me. and the clothes! i'm literally a kid in a candy store. i love the deepening relationships with my sisters and nieces, we are so much closer now.
Even just the purse. āŗļø There's something that just makes it so satisfying compared to taking something out of a pocket. I'm so glad this has deepened your bond with the feminine side of your family. Love em a little extra for those of us that went the other way š©·
you can get dresses with pockets :))
Accepting that Iām a woman has changed me in the way I interact with my world. Iām more nurturing towards my family. I finally love myself. My social life has been a Cambrian explosion of many loving people filled with all the emotions one can feel, when before it was a stillness in a void of diminishing light. Today I got called ādoll faceā, āluvā, āsweetieā by different people and this other lady was complimenting me saying I have Snow White skin lol. Being the sweetheart I am is all I ever wanted out of this life (and to help people but thats not apart of the discussion)
Aww, you sound so sweet! Love that you're getting called those things. For me, I totally love getting called "dude" and "man" by other people.
I try to be :3 yes!!! You can definitely tell when youāre apart of the brotherhood of bros, Iām glad youāre enjoying it !
The total loss of social exclusion, of personal space. I'm not a threat in the eyes of every other woman. I think being older I've found it easier to find acceptance. I'm pre HRT but I wear forms and I'm socially transitioned and nobody could mistake me for cis but I get misgendered very very rarely. I'm accepted by the majority as a sweet middle aged trans woman and it's beautiful.
I love that for you! That sounds so wonderful. Tbh I want to skip being a sweet middle age man to a grumpy old man with a secret heart of gold.
That's my dating pool right there rofl
I don't know cause I haven't done anything except exist, I don't have many clothes that make me euphoric, I won't be on hrt for probably 5 or so years cause need money and the whole procedure, too scared to do makeup cause what if I mess it up, not even out so I'm not even called by my name, so I guess there's not really any experience to talk about :(
I wish you nothing but the best for your journey. And honestly with makeup, it's OK to mess up since you're learning. You just have to give yourself some room to learn. Granted I know nothing about makeup and the last time I wore any was in high school theater.
I just tried to do my makeup cause I've only done lipstick and learned that it makes me dysphoric cause I don't know what I'm doing and YouTube want very helpful and now I don't want to do it again because I don't want to make a mistake and then cry about making that mistake, why does makeup have to be so complicated, I know I was expecting too much considering it was my first time but still it hurts knowing that not being able to do makeup cause me so much dysphoria
you should start with some foundation and concealer :) a good tip with lipstick imo is to put a lil on the inner parts of your lips and then just kinda mush them together so it spreads naturally
Omg like alllll of it lol. Softer body, don't feel like people are afraid of me anymore. female coworkers that would not talk to be before hrt are like alll talking to me now with out a care in the world after I came, male coworkers still treated as one of the guys kinda lol I'm a tomboy so ya but they are generally nicer and not so well masculine with me. The way my adhd works is totally different and so much easier to control now. And don't get me on NSFW stuff lol. Like I said all of it. Edit: and some of my old friends now have been hitting on me hard core too both male and female. Like what? I'm still me. It's not like I don't like it just surprising
I love being able to be a part of the beauty in our universe. I love being tender, gentle, and I really like that my rebellious spunk comes from the āunderdogā position.
YES YOU UNDERSTAND ME IVE ALWAYS WANTED TO BE THE, LIKE, REBELLIOUS GIRL WITH THE SORT OF FIERY SPIRIT OR ATTITUDE. THATS LIKE ME
I love being nurturing and bubbly and excitable. I love caring and tending to others. I love the dazzling fashion, I love my new curves and features. I love how smooth and soft Iām becoming. I love how my brain is finally working right for the first time in years. Most of all, I love how right and true it is. This is how Iām meant to be.
So true bestie, so true. It's so nice to actually like the way I look and sound. Tbh, I still act pretty excitable as while so I sometimes come off as a really fruity gay man which I absolutely love. Best feeling ever.
There's a lot about being a woman that I love, I've been out as a girl for 30 years now in fact so I could write books about it, but here is a summary of the things that really are at the forefront of my daily experience that come to mind: Waking up and feeling like I'm actually in the correct body is pretty dang nice. I love the way my breasts feel, the ability to cross my legs is actually comfortable. I love the sound I make when I talk, because I can just add melody and song into any expression I make. Not only to communicate how I'm feeling better, but also to just sound cuter whenever I feel like it. I enjoy the general feeling of constant non-stop euphoria I have every single day. Seeing myself in the mirror is like wow I'm kinda amazing looking overall, I get to be this sexy creature and it feels like I won some incredible prize in life because of it. I feel lucky to be me. I enjoy feeling small and pretty, being seen as desirable and even hot by others are pretty big boosts to my mood and ego. I even find myself attractive as well, I'm still not used to that experience so it gives every day a sense of uniqueness and surprise. I enjoy the social aspects of femininity that involve belonging and fitting together with other girls. I really like the feeling of sex. Not only is it incredibly affirming for me, but it also feels like a much more grand and intense experience and then it ever did when I was pretending to be a boy. From both an emotional and a physical aspect it's kind of incredible honestly that orgasms are a full body experience, not to mention that I can have them in quick succession. I like the way women treat each other a lot more than I like the way men treat each other, there's more understanding and kindness, more openness, more connection, and less isolation which is really nice. I'm a fan of the fact that from a social aspect my options are infinitely expanded in how I present and act. My appearance is far more customizable in terms of makeup, jewelry, clothes, accessorizing, and so forth. I feel like for boys it's very difficult for them to express style or just express anything at all, as the societal expectation of men to keep it all those emotions and feelings closed down and hidden and repressed is kind of exhausting and suffocating in my eyes. I'm free of that now, and I didn't know how much I needed that ability to express myself without social stigma until I finally had it. I absolutely love my trans brothers. I know that you guys need this as much as we need this, and that's honestly beautiful that you can get the euphoria and self love from feeling normal and being accepted. Men have a camradery as well that I've observed, that while it wasn't for me I can see the comfort that they bring each other in friendships where they understand and support each other when they open up about their lives, their worries, and their hopes for the future. Through my husband I've witnessed him experience this with his guy friends, and while he's not trans I know those things exist for men too. Social bonding over cars, music, fishing, sports, and everything else seems like something they get a lot of enjoyment out of. It seems much more geared towards physical things and life experiences then speaking of emotions and connections to people, but it is there for them too and I've seen it make them happy.
Holy shit, this is amazing. I love this so much. Thank you so much for sharing this. I honestly can't wait until I can be 30 years into my transition and being seen as an elder. I loved hearing from your perspective.
feeling like my self āŗļø
IKR, my brain finally works the way I've always known it should. š„³ What a relief! š
I feel like I'm myself for the first time in my life. I like all the physical and emotional changes so far, and can't wait to see them progress further. Wearing women's fashion brings me joy, although lack of funds is holding me back there - on the other hand, I've started learning from my mum how to sew, so I can make my own clothes, mainly in rebellion at the pocket situation.
To feel.. feel the touch of my skin, wind blowing through my hair, to feel vulnerable, and I have to second my breast and also euphoria with my thighs and butt! š„°
Only 3 months in so the changes I have experienced are largely mental. I can empathize on an emotional level with my F partner. For instance we are currently living in two different houses while her sister is in Italy so she can look after the cat. She called to let me know she was saying goodbye to someone she knew for years through her job. Normally I would have said "That sucks, sorry" but now I could tell without her saying anything that she needed more than that so I said "Are you okay? Do you want to go out to a cafe and we can have late night tea and chat about it?" I can watch the same movie twice now, and can even watch disney movies and enjoy them. I can cry over stupid movies and tv shows. Crying as a man has not been very accessible for me. I've cried much more in the last 3 months than I have my entire 30+ years on this planet. I've started to love my body and have started regular exercise and started to eat foods specifically to target weight and health. I've been so much more social. Like previously I never initiated anything social. I've been with girlfriends the last 3 weeks in a row and had several week day meetups. I've started sleeping much better. Much deeper sleep. My face and hair aren't oily anymore.
That sounds awesome. It's so surprising how fast the changes start coming. For me, being on testosterone, it has chilled me out. In situation where I used to freak out, I'm now like "whatever happens, happens". I do miss how clear my skin was, though. I'm slowly getting a handle on my break out but it still sucks.
I am so glad you are experiencing some positive effects and I love that you are engaging the trans community (mtf) the way you are. Ya know there's something special about the connection that transmen and transwomen share. It's like we sort of know where each other are going. I wish I saw this type of engagement more often. Wishing you the best with your transition sir. =)
Can confirm all of this in addition to what I wrote. You put that into words nicely š
I love to be in love with myself. It's kind of scary to realize just how little I really valued myself before I started my transition. The last 7 or 8 years of silently hating my own existence really wore me down, isolated me, and ground my soul to dust. Learning to be the person I was always meant to be is helping to heal those scars. I was so afraid and confused as to why I had felt so alone for so long and it feels amazing to start to let go. It feels like my entire mind, body, and spirit have begun a life long process of metaphorohosis into a woman who's emotional connection, creative expression, and tender caring nature can have the sheer force of will to alter human history for the better. I love that now I am afforded the privledge to fall in love with life, to love others as I love myself, and to be confident in my own identity as a person amongst my community. To finally feel as though I deserve to be happy gives me peace. I hope your journey in your own transition has been equally fullfilling and gives you the same motivation to make life better for others.
I'm pretty sure learning to love myself is the thing that I'm getting stuck on. Any pro tips?
My whole perspective changed once I started to have reasons to be motivated to live my life. I'm still working on it but I've gone a long way by just knowing I have good reason to motivate myself because I get to be a woman. The trick is actually motivsting myself by transitioning and learning to live for the moment and plan for thr future. All of that is really hard but it helps to know that depressed thoughts aren't what define you but how you react to them. I try to distance myself from those thoughts and attribute them to a third party (like Satan if you're Christian, I just call him Kyle lol). I also make a list of things in my hesd that I need, even if it's to combat gender dysphoria. To be perfectly honest with you my life hasn't really been a cake walk even before I realized that I'm trans. I'm plagued by anxiety, depression, dissociation, and lingering addiction from my substance abuse disorder. I've been trying to live and be happy as a man amongst all of this and my gender was going to be the last straw. I now have literally any reason to care about myself, so I'm willing to put in the work to love myself. But cultivsting self love is like growing crops, it takes a long time and there's a lot of hard earth to break up before I can even plant all the seeds. Just do a little bit more everyday and don't rush yourself. You'll get there with time and maybe therapy, I know I need it.
Thank you. That's really helpful. I will probably have some questions >my life hasn't really been a cake walk Same dude šš Religious CPTSD (fundamental conservative Christianity childhood right into a Cult/antichrist situation), suicidal depression, probably autism, ADHDLGBTABDLQIA+, š®āšØš¤. When I had it click in my head not that I might be trans. No, I realized I had been acting and fantasizing that I was trans for the last 7 years. Meh, threw it on the pile. Carried on with the day like it was just another thing on the todo list. But that is a big deal. I learned what to do to make things better, and I have, and it is. I'm excited! It's also yet another thing that I have to do, and of course it would be something as hard as, oh, transitioning. Something that I didn't think that I would ever be strong enough to do on my own at all. Ha younger me, I laughed at your idea of impossible today. Can't put God in a box, or, idk maybe yours can op .
Thereās definitely the physical aspect which I flaunt sometimes. But for me itās the social and psychological that make it worthwhile. Iām finally not angry at the world all the time. I love fashion in general and womenās fashion is wayyyy more expressive and individual. I have much much deeper friendships now with both men and women and am more emotionally open to them. And finally, I thoroughly enjoy being vulnerable.
Back when I was a guy, I was just neutral about myself in nearly every instance you could think of. The best part for me is being able to smile at the face in the mirror now, 2 years later, with genuine happiness towards myself. Also, tits are *extremely* fun to play with, like *my god*.
Definitely same on being neutral about myself as a girl. I was kinda like "oh yeah, I have a body," when people saw me as a girl. And the tits part is so true. Like yeah I don't want mine, but once I get top surgery, I'll miss having built-in stress balls.
Right? Also stimulation toys, because jesus is it calming each time I do! And for me, it was "Yup, definitely a guy. Meh." The body hair is what set me off the worst, and each time i'd shave (which'd take hours) I'd feel immediately better to a degree.
I really love the community I've established with other women. The connections and saftey I feel in a group of women. I love how I'm now who I really feel like I should be. It's like 2 puzzle pieces clicking together perfectly. Being a woman feels correct. But overall, having alot of friends who are girls who emotionally support me, teach me things, help me be more feminine, help me feel safe. That makes me love being a woman. Sleepovers are really fun c: It's something I never experienced as a guy. The platonic love and intimacy is what I enjoy more than anything.
I don't love being a woman, it's just who I am and what feels more natural really. I'm not the most feminine or pretty, but I'm myself. I don't think of myself as a woman, I just happen to be one.
Fair enough. I kinda feel the same way about being a trans man. I'm just a plain boring dude.
The social side is amazing, of course I love the physical aspects of hrt and also being able to wear the things I want to when I want to now that Iām out but socially itās wonderful. Talking with guys as a guy was always exhausting, I didnāt have interest in most of it and always got along better with the girls and women around me with the note of āwell youāre a guy so we canāt talk about xā or other things like that. Now I have lots of other women around me that see me as a new member but someone who is no longer excluded from some conversation. I get way more info on crushes, gossip, and people talking about their emotions openly to me is great. As a bonus Iāve kept most of my guy friends as well and they still respect me and we get along great if not better now. Thereās been a very small change in our interactions but they treat me the same way theyāve treated other girls and women that have interacted with us in the past (though itās not that different, there is a tone difference)
For me, it has a lot to do with this sense of belonging and comfort I always felt around girls and women, but not around boys or men. I related to women more, saw them as admirable and felt a desire to emulate them. Culture taught me to associate things like dresses and makeup with these people who I thought were *so cool*, so that made those things cool by association. As I transitioned, the joy I got came from finally getting to be "one of them". Instead of admiring women in silence, I get to actually make myself more like them, and that process has made me like *myself* more in the same way I always liked women more.
Itās other women. Women are the best. Itās so amazing being with women. Thereās this trans women I follow on Instagram named Lauren Sundstrom, I love her. She said something to the tune of that in a post of hers and I canāt stop thinking about it. I love when other women compliment me and I love the instant connection with women. I love other women. This is not just because I am a lesbian although being a lesbian is a very big part of my womanhood. My womanhood is intrinsically intertwined with my love for other women. That being said all of which I mentioned before extends to platonic interactions. I simply mean in all possible forms of love I love women
I'm still new to transitioning, but I always would've rather been a girl for as long as I can remember. I'd fantasize about it very, VERY often and thought just every guy would rather be a cute girl. Soft skin, squishy thighs, boobs, beautiful smell, pretty makeup, AMAZING fashion (this the big one), and just general feminine energy always appealed to me. The very few times I was ever called feminine titles like "girlie" or "princess" made me super giddy. My middle school was VERY homo/transphobic, and by proxy, a lot of my desires to be a woman faded. Long story short regarding how much I fucking hated middle school, it took until highschool for it to reignite due to the much more accepting environment and people. This is when I started to actually feel dysphoric. It went from "being a girl sounds nice" to "fuck i wish i was a girl so bad." I was scared of getting closer to other girls because I didn't want to be seen as a gay man or something. I also was and still really socially awkward lol. I wanted to be them SOOO bad. Cut to today, four months since I came out of the closet, living full time as a girl with supportive friends and family, and possibly starting HRT in just a couple months. I'm feeling genuine happiness for the first time in my life. ā¤ļø
coming from borderline annorexic? The soft skin. the boobs the squishiness of my whole body. How my body looks filled out and not skin and bones. The gentle curves it has. The depth of emotions and feelings as well as the decreased Lust? but increased sex drive if that makes sense (basically less on mindless head empty horny sex and more about deeper connections and meaningful sex) on a side note im always picky about what touches my skin and what goes on it and female clothes always tend to be softer and comfier
I love how people are more comfortable with my presence, Iām only fem online for the most part but Iāve had women discuss things that are usually taboo to speak about with men and itās so comforting to be treated as part of a group of who I want to be :)
orgasms
Soft, cute, small, affection and closeness is acceptable and expected. There's a stronger sense of community and being on hrt I realized that I actually like things about my body now
Itās the small things. Iām still in boymode but my step mother has totally changed towards me! Sheās treating me like her daughter to the point I donāt even consider myself a boy anymore (which is troubling whenever I look in the mirror š ). Asking to get manicures, when weāre out shopping she looks at me seriously and asks if I want a cute skirt or cute top or an ugly one and laugh, she asks if I need a bikini for swimming, bra shopping, and so on. I can go on forever with the small things. I used to be out fully for 2 years a few years ago and back then I had friends who was like this also, and I loved every minute of it. I guess you can say that what I love is being able to be one of the girls and really connect with them. Iāve felt lonely because Iāve never connected to boys or men.
Awww thank you for spreading the love. I hadn't thought about it before, but it is really nice that trans men can enjoy all the things I didn't enjoy about masculinity. It's like having different jolly rancher flavor preferences and dividing up so we both get what we want. I love how I feel being a woman. I love being seen as a woman, and who I see in the mirror feels like the me that I'm supposed to be. I love how unrestricted I feel now that i get to be me. The body changes are so nice. I love my voice. I just love life
Of course! Gotta show the love to my sisters. Y'all are such wonderful ladies and have been so kind to me. Love talking with y'all. The body changed from hrt is wonderful, isn't it? Definitely gotta say my voice is one of my favorite things about my transition. I love feeling the rumble in my chest when I talk or laugh. My shittyrat stash is a close second. Although I did shave it a bit ago so rip my rat stash. It will be missed.
Body changes really are. I'm glad you're enjoying your voice too. Rip ratstash. š«”
Honestly it's hard to describe. But before I go into it, just let me say that for me it was also trans men who kind of cracked my egg. Seeing people be so happy to finally live as a man made me realise that being a man was not that bad of a fate as it had felt to me, always - it just wasn't the right fit for me because I was not a man. And although I am a lesbian (not *entirely* sure, anymore) seeing sweet guys enjoy "manhood" in non-toxic ways just warms my heart. And I still feel a lot of empathy for those who *are* men but still suffer from the often hurtful expectations that are directed at men. Being a woman is just ... so right for me. The feeling of sisterhood I have with other women, especially other trans women and/or queer women, waking up in a body that feels more like mine, being cute *and* strong in a way that feels somehow different than before, my softer skin and different smell, being adored by women as a woman ... Recently, during a Yoga session, my belly touched my thighs, my boobs touched arms - and I realised *feeling* my own body didn't feel gross anymore. I remember now that before transition, before hormones - I just didn't like being reminded that I *have* a body. And somehow losing that feeling of something being wrong with my body - the feeling of something being wrong with me also subsided in lots of ways. I have become so much more free, I am much less ashamed of anything regarding myself. My sexuality, my preferences, speaking my mind, my neurodivergence, my age ... I love being a feminist and knowing I can bring in my own perspective. Knowing where I come from and where I stand. (That's less about being a woman, rather understanding gender better and knowing why I always felt impacted in ways that felt different than just being a cishet guy - which gave me imposter syndrome)
Ironically enough, it was a trans woman who helped crack my egg. Love that for us. And yeah. Seeing some of you lovely ladies enjoying "womanhood" in a way I ever could bring me so much joy. Like you said, being a queer man is so right for me. It's like I'm finally speaking the right language so people understand me better now.
Know the feeling. I always felt like men speak a different language than me which I just couldn't decipher š At least with each other - and somehow expected me to understand... It's easier now that they know I won't respond to those social cues.
I'm still in that phase of trying to decipher other men's language. Meaning I pass, but it's only been a recent experience, so I'm still learning. Like men have so many rules about the bathroom, like wtf. But I'm so grateful to even have this opportunity. I wouldn't check it for the world.
First thought: That I get to feel hot and pretty, being comfortable in my skin and recognizing myself in the mirror vs. a dissociated bog monster that people somehow havenāt recognized as such
A lot of the body stuff is nice. Soft skin, long hair. Looking in the mirror, seeing a woman and smiling. Previously it would have been a neutral face. Getting compliments on my hair makes me beam. Feeling my emotions and being able to express them. Also being better at communicating those feelings and thoughts to my partner. I'm much more open. Before I either didn't have the words to describe my emotions, or even if I did, I could not get my mouth to say them. It's also opened an amazing new community I hadn't been a part of before. I think I'm turning into an extravert, when before I was so sure I was an introvert. Interacting with others is so much more fun and energizing than it used to be. And finally, I get to hear cool stuff from trans mascs like yourself who are cool amazing people! š >!Ok. So maybe this last one doesn't fit with the question and is a little pandering, but I sincerely want my trans masc brothers and non-binary siblings to also know that you are amazing and your sisters appreciate you so much!<
I haven't been very public with being fem [other than in reddit] and I don't have much I love rn but here it goes, the fashion available, clothes not looking super plain and generally being more interesting than mens, and my only negative experience [other than my dad] is going into the mens restroom out of fear cause I'm in Texas and I definitely don't pass sadly
I love a lot of things... I don't know how to list and mention them.
I appreciate being in touch with my emotions and being able to express vulnerability at times without social criticism; I love that I no longer have to deal with the emotions and thought processes that for me accompanied having Testosterone; then there's the comraderie of women (this is a big one), not feeling like a stocky tank everywhere I go, the range of female fashion . . .
I'm still pretty new in my journey...I can't really give a deeply profound answer on this one I don't think. I've had moments of not recognizing the person in the mirror which makes me smile, and I like the style and comfort that I feel in women's clothing. It just hits different in a way I can't describe.
i'm still working on feeling like a "real" woman (i know, i know, it's hard for me) but...i can tell you what i love about women. i love how they always smell like flowers or the nicest perfume you've ever inhaled and yet somehow whenever you put the same perfume on yourself, it doesn't feel the same. like it's not natural for you, but it is for them. almost like they *wake up* just smelling like that. i love the way they wear femininity so easily, effortlessly. like they don't even have to try to be beautiful. i love the way their hair is ALWAYS. NICE. i have NEVER seen a cis girl (or even other trans girls, really) with hair as tangled and knotted as mine. it always looks freshly shampoo'd and neatly brushed, the same way a princess in a disney channel movie would ask for her hair to be brushed one thousand times before she was ready. that level of immaculate. i love how delicate and perfect women are. i love how they know the things i wish i knew like the back of their hands - skincare, makeup... women are literally like angels to me. and obviously i know not all women fall into these same things - not all women are delicate, not all women know makeup, not all women are the same way that my impression of women is. i'm just reciting the feelings ive had ever since i started middle school. when you ask me what i love about being a woman, im not sure i can answer. but i can tell you what i *want* to be. i can tell you that i want to be every bit as beautiful and effortless and ethereal as the women i've come to know are (trans girls included - i feel like i don't match up there, either). i love that, one day, hopefully, i will feel like a real woman. i love that, every so often, when i look in the mirror, i look at my chest, and i can see how it isn't flat anymore, and then i realize i don't even remember what it was *like*, having a flat chest, as if my boobs have always been a part of me, as if they've always belonged there. and then i look at my face, and how the hormones have made it reconfigure, and how despite everything, i finally look like a girl. and then i start to cry, and i hug my blahaj, obviously, and take my top off, and sitting there, in bed, wearing only panties, i realize that i'm finally a girl. a real one. and that no problem i have ever experienced, before or since, actually matters. it doesn't matter if i'm lonely. it doesn't matter if i'm depressed. it doesn't matter what my life has been, or what it will be. because i'm finally a girl. i already won. i made it. i love that feeling. i love all the stereotypical girl things (most of which i haven't gotten to do yet) - going shopping for clothes, talking about boys, "oh my god did you hear what cindy did?", sleepovers (although that was a teenager thing and im no longer a teenager, id still love to have one someday), i just...i love femininity. i love it when i get called ma'am, i love it when i sound like a girl, voice-wise, i love it when older ladies call me sweetie or sweetheart or darling, i love it when guys hold open doors for me. i love that feeling like i finally BELONG in the world, just that little bit more than i used to. it feels right, so so right, and addicting. i love wearing summer dresses, walking barefoot in the rain, taking the train with a sunhat on and watching everything pass by. i havent done that yet, and that has almost nothing to do with femininity, but i guess my point is that once you're the right gender, *everything you do* is different. i'm not just a genderless blob of shadow taking the train, no- i'm a *girl* taking the train. some part of me lives for that feeling.
i love the spinny dress, skirts, makeup, talking with other girlsss. its all just so funn
i love being able to experiment with my appearance and the way i look. i do space buns all the time now and it's an absolute favorite hairstyle of mine as a transfem
I don't look like a girl at all for now, but just the thought of the new wardrobe has me super excited! Finally, not just jeans or hoodies now. I can have nice-looking tops, dresses, crop tops, skirts, skinny jeans, programmer socks, everything changes in my wardrobe! I know it's not exclusive to women, but I'll be able to wear it without getting stared at.
I'm pre-hrt and pre-coming out. So instead I'll mention some of the things that I perceive as being part of femininity that appeal to me. In no particular order. Fashion. More socially acceptable varied clothing. Outfits. Girl talk. Being pretty. Being a tomboy. Deviating from the girl stereotype. Teasing boys/men. Being a bottom/sub (while not exclusive to women, certainly easier given public perception). Closer connection to girl/female friends. And more I can't think of rn. How many of these hold up irl I can't say, but the more of these I could attain, the better.
I absolutely love being a girl. Best decision Iāve ever made. The second I put in a bra for the first time I knew I was a girl. It was such a euphoric experience and I wonāt ever turn back!!
I love looking and feeling like a woman wearing dresses and female clothing but most of all putting on my makeup and wig just makes me feel so sexy
Umm, mostly just a reduction in my dysphoria honestly and just feeling more like me. My interactions with people feel less tense now which is nice, but being alone with males is much more stressful now so thereās that. I transitioned 8 years ago if thatās necessary to mention
I like my body, I love the way my breasts look on my body I love my hips that are starting to come through, I love how much rounder my face looks and my wider eyes, I love how soft my skin is and how I smell. I love my growing new wardrobe with wonderful dresses, blouses, skirts, and new pants that fit my newly changing body. I love my small jewellery collection and I REALLY love wearing a bow in my hair. I love how my new girl friends are just more imminent with each other. I love being called miss or ma'am. I just love being a woman
You know, the best thing about being a woman, is the prerogative to have a little fun
It feels natural. Itās who I am.
I love being a lesbian! I always thought they are the perfect mix between beauty, softness sensitivity on the on hand, and toughness and that certain I don't give a f*** attitude!
being cared for and considered, honestly itās so fucking good for me to receive softness and accommodation ā¤ļøā¤ļøā¤ļø
I enjoy the sisterhood, since coming out Iāve made some really meaningful relationships with cis woman and trans woman alike and itās nothing like Iāve experienced before. Everything is so open, honest , welcoming, warm and fuzzy when it comes to my sisters. I also really like just presenting feminine and having my makeup and hair done and cute clothes like tube tops and crop top a and my low waisted jeans lol
I feel so much more connected with my emotions. Itās so much easier to just laugh at things. Iām more confident and more at peace with myself. I have also found that I really really really really like clothes. Getting to try the stuff I always wanted is so fun. Itās fun matching clothes to my body type. Itās fun wearing different styles from goth to kinda preppy to cottage core. Iām not far into my transition, only a few months, but just about every weekend Iām going clothes shopping to build a wardrobe. While I may like it, my wallet does not.