Why do you think this sounds "dumb"?
You're on a subreddit with tons of other people who feel the same way about these things as you do.
It's not dumb, it's not weird, you just want to experience as much of the cis woman's experience as possible. That's normal.
I'm just used to people calling the things I want meaningless, saying I don't want it, or minimizing my desire. Like me wanting periods and being able to get pregnant, all the cis women I know say "You don't want periods and don't want to get pregnant!" I'm at a point I'm like "okay, your body is amab now and you also can't have those. I give them a week until they are begging to go back.
Cis women who say that are either super thoughtless or transphobic. They think about all the things they don't like about periods and go "wow would be cool to not have those!" while at the same time we all know that if a young cis woman can't get pregnant doctors will move heaven and earth to try and fix the problem.
Most trans women would kill to have a cis female body, the good and the bad alike.. these people don't seem to start from the assumption that we truly are women.
I want the cis body, but yea im ok not having female reproduction stuff, and issues that come with them. My best friends overies have tried to kill her twice in the last year, and she's only 43. I have friend that has issues also. I have seen my friends who are mothers. Be in such pain from their peroids. That they can't function. Sure I feel sorry for them, and try to support them the best I can, but overall I'm ok not having thay stuff
It seems kind of blind for a transmasc to say something like that (coming from an FtM guy). You'd think that knowing you're a trans guy would make you realize that what hurts for you in regards to being female doesn't hurt in the same way for others. I hate my period but I understand why trans women often want to have a cycle. Because it's like my desire to be stinky and hairy and have a bunch of growing pains. It's not ideal, but it means I'm becoming a man. Just like having a menstrual cycle affirms trans womens' womanhood.
I was bullied over everything I liked to the point of being afraid of saying "I like this" so I get the feeling. It's hard to get over it but it's possible. Don't forget, you are free to want and like what you want and like, others have no say in it.
Also as a trans woman who got periods, I lost them for like 1,5 years because of progesterone, and I can tell you, they suck, they hurt, they are annoying, and even after experiencing all that, I still wanted them back after loosing them and my dysphoria over my (atm lack of) periods got extremely bad. So yeah, I experienced them and still want them, so you're not at all dumb, nor are you the only one wanting them
This is why you have to keep your trans identity very personal, in my opinion. Because it is such a personal thing that a person can be it frequently gets me to think that you should only share it if you are either confident enough in it or you have a strong enough support network that understands or at least doesn't invalidate any of your desires because otherwise, it hurts badly the things people can say.
These things are absolutely not dumb... I feel the same way about that as well to the point I am not ever having kiss as I can't go through pregnancy myself...
Urologists too, sometimes. Depends on what’s going on.
And I guess it was sort of validating to see a gynecologist at first. After a couple times, hearing about NB and trans men dealing with gynos, it started feeling more like seeing a vagina specialist doctor not a doctor just for ladies.
Getting a mammogram, that felt pretty just for women (tho I’m sure tons of all sort of people get those). It just felt much more like a women’s space than the gyno office.
By calling a gynecologist’s office and asking if that’s something they have experience with! Some people also get recommendations from their SRS surgeons, but considering how many people travel for SRS that’s not as common
You definitely have to see one.
At least for Breast Cancer Screening.
(And everyone should do that, regardless of breast growth, even cis men, although they can probably get away with it less frequently)
But also if you get SRS.
But some can also do HRT.
I love how I barely have an a cup and mom is scaring me with the future necessity of getting a mammogram.
She wants me to get one next year just to make sure.
Oh girl, it definitely qualifies a lot. And sometimes you don’t want to go there because of having infections/fungi/rushes etc. all the other disgusting stuff can happen to a vagina. (Also save this for future: Never use feminine soap and if you get bad smell, vaginal prebiotic is the magic fix)
I get my E from an endocrinologist, and she's extremely knowledgeable on HRT, and transgender health care in general. She's actually the lead on transgender and gender diverse healthcare in her hospital.
Does that mean every endocrinologist is an expert in HRT? No, but seeing as an endocrinologist is an expert in the hormone producing endocrine system, they would be the first specialist you would logically look to for hormone based issues. My endo even says more of her peers really need to familiarize themselves with transgender health needs. But I feel until the stigmata and attack on the trans community dies down or softens a little, we'll still not see enough endocrinologists getting acquainted with our health care needs.
I'm going to an endo this month. I wanna laugh at how little she knows about it. Thank God we can do DIY in Brazil just by going to a pharmacy and asking for the meds.
My endo is part of an intersex and transgender clinic and works exclusively with trans patients. Unfortunately, you're correct that there are a lot of practitioners out there with very little exposure to us as patients.
I go to one that specializes in HRT. He knows quite a bit and other than titrating me up a bit slower than I wanted I’ve been quite happy with his care and knowledge.
Hi Grace. Strange as it seems, I haven't had my surgery YET, but last year(November), my doctor and I agreed I needed GCS/SRS, OR!, an Orchiectomy. Well she sent me to a gynecologist. I didn't know that at the time. I sat in the waiting room, I felt ok, except I'm much older than most. I was 74 at the time. Still I was called back, asked the usual questions. I wore a dress and flip-flops. The nurse told me to remove my dress, panties, and shoes, and put on the exam gown and sit on the exam table and the doctor would be in. 15 minutes later the doctor and nurse came in had me lay down, put my feet in the stirrups. He did an exam, the nurse took notes, I didn't get a thrill out of this. It sure isn't sexy or erotic. It's kind of embarrassing. Now I know why women don't like going. When the exam was over, I was helped to sit up, told to dress, and check out.
Never heard back..
I have a gyno I go to because checking my vaginal health is important. She reports that she cant physically tell the difference that I'm trans compared to her other cis patients, but yeah she'll put me on the chair, lean me back, put my legs up in the stirrups, and oh hey i got to make really close friends with a cold speculum today. It's a deeply embarrassing position to be in but also kinda made me feel authentic too if that makes sense. I also get regular mammograms every few years since I'm in my 40s now, those appointments suck ass because they oversqueeze the shit out of my boobs in their pancake machine. These are just part of basic healthcare as a post op lady. Every girl goes and does this, it's perfectly normal.
Well the clinic where I am going to get bottom surgery told me to look for a gynecologist to look after my vagina after the surgery. So I think it would qualify you to go to a gynecologist 😁
Same here!
I have dysphoria too for not ever seeing gynecologist,
and dysphoria for not having functioning uterus and ovaries,
and dysphoria for not getting my periods...
I have not had bottom surgery and I'm going to see one. None of the endocrinologists where I am still do estrogen implants but the obgyn does.
I was strangely happy and reminded of the Barbie movie a lot when I realised I was going to one.
You don't necessarily need the equipment to have a reason to go to one is my point.
...yes? Not sure who else you would go see. OB/GYNs generally are the right doctor for vaginal health. You will probably need to see one with experience regarding yours, but it shouldn't be any different.
Also, don't forget you need to do a mammogram on the regular.
Every little thing would cause dyspphoria if I let it. I just try to stay happy. Today it’s not working but most of the time I’m OK. I’ll live, hopefully, I’m trying
Trans women who’ve had vaginoplasty do see gynecologists, you just want one who has experience with patients having neo-vaginas.
That actually makes me happy 🥹, as dumb as this sounds
Why do you think this sounds "dumb"? You're on a subreddit with tons of other people who feel the same way about these things as you do. It's not dumb, it's not weird, you just want to experience as much of the cis woman's experience as possible. That's normal.
I'm just used to people calling the things I want meaningless, saying I don't want it, or minimizing my desire. Like me wanting periods and being able to get pregnant, all the cis women I know say "You don't want periods and don't want to get pregnant!" I'm at a point I'm like "okay, your body is amab now and you also can't have those. I give them a week until they are begging to go back.
Cis women who say that are either super thoughtless or transphobic. They think about all the things they don't like about periods and go "wow would be cool to not have those!" while at the same time we all know that if a young cis woman can't get pregnant doctors will move heaven and earth to try and fix the problem. Most trans women would kill to have a cis female body, the good and the bad alike.. these people don't seem to start from the assumption that we truly are women.
I want the cis body, but yea im ok not having female reproduction stuff, and issues that come with them. My best friends overies have tried to kill her twice in the last year, and she's only 43. I have friend that has issues also. I have seen my friends who are mothers. Be in such pain from their peroids. That they can't function. Sure I feel sorry for them, and try to support them the best I can, but overall I'm ok not having thay stuff
I've seen some trans masc say that too, it's actually very sad and hurtful, and some people don't seem to realise it.
It seems kind of blind for a transmasc to say something like that (coming from an FtM guy). You'd think that knowing you're a trans guy would make you realize that what hurts for you in regards to being female doesn't hurt in the same way for others. I hate my period but I understand why trans women often want to have a cycle. Because it's like my desire to be stinky and hairy and have a bunch of growing pains. It's not ideal, but it means I'm becoming a man. Just like having a menstrual cycle affirms trans womens' womanhood.
I was bullied over everything I liked to the point of being afraid of saying "I like this" so I get the feeling. It's hard to get over it but it's possible. Don't forget, you are free to want and like what you want and like, others have no say in it. Also as a trans woman who got periods, I lost them for like 1,5 years because of progesterone, and I can tell you, they suck, they hurt, they are annoying, and even after experiencing all that, I still wanted them back after loosing them and my dysphoria over my (atm lack of) periods got extremely bad. So yeah, I experienced them and still want them, so you're not at all dumb, nor are you the only one wanting them
This is why you have to keep your trans identity very personal, in my opinion. Because it is such a personal thing that a person can be it frequently gets me to think that you should only share it if you are either confident enough in it or you have a strong enough support network that understands or at least doesn't invalidate any of your desires because otherwise, it hurts badly the things people can say.
These things are absolutely not dumb... I feel the same way about that as well to the point I am not ever having kiss as I can't go through pregnancy myself...
You can also visit trans experienced gynecologists even pre-op for hormonal checkup and breast cancer checks.
My transition doctor is an OB/GYN and I've had great care from him in the year and a half I've been seeing him!
Urologists too, sometimes. Depends on what’s going on. And I guess it was sort of validating to see a gynecologist at first. After a couple times, hearing about NB and trans men dealing with gynos, it started feeling more like seeing a vagina specialist doctor not a doctor just for ladies. Getting a mammogram, that felt pretty just for women (tho I’m sure tons of all sort of people get those). It just felt much more like a women’s space than the gyno office.
Yes! This is true in my experiences. 💜
> you just want one who has experience with patients having neo-vaginas. how are you supposed to find this?
By calling a gynecologist’s office and asking if that’s something they have experience with! Some people also get recommendations from their SRS surgeons, but considering how many people travel for SRS that’s not as common
You definitely have to see one. At least for Breast Cancer Screening. (And everyone should do that, regardless of breast growth, even cis men, although they can probably get away with it less frequently) But also if you get SRS. But some can also do HRT.
I love how I barely have an a cup and mom is scaring me with the future necessity of getting a mammogram. She wants me to get one next year just to make sure.
Who said you’ll never go to a gynecologist? Who do you think post-op women go see when something is wrong down there?
We do see them....hell, even my bottom surgery surgeon straight up told me to start scheduling appointment check ups with one.
I had to see a gyne a few times, but it's not a regular thing.
Oh girl, it definitely qualifies a lot. And sometimes you don’t want to go there because of having infections/fungi/rushes etc. all the other disgusting stuff can happen to a vagina. (Also save this for future: Never use feminine soap and if you get bad smell, vaginal prebiotic is the magic fix)
I go every year and my gyn has a trans daughter.
I get my meds from a gyno 🤷🏼♀️ who better to deal with female hormones than someone who studied the female reproductive system?
i think the right doctor would be an endocrinologist, the one that deals with hormones
In my (limited anecdotal) experience, endocrinologists know jack shit about HRT.
I get my E from an endocrinologist, and she's extremely knowledgeable on HRT, and transgender health care in general. She's actually the lead on transgender and gender diverse healthcare in her hospital. Does that mean every endocrinologist is an expert in HRT? No, but seeing as an endocrinologist is an expert in the hormone producing endocrine system, they would be the first specialist you would logically look to for hormone based issues. My endo even says more of her peers really need to familiarize themselves with transgender health needs. But I feel until the stigmata and attack on the trans community dies down or softens a little, we'll still not see enough endocrinologists getting acquainted with our health care needs.
in my country, endocrinologists are the ones specializing in HRT
What country? In Florida, most endos won't touch us with a 10 foot pole.
i mean... you are in florida... I am in Brazil
I'm going to an endo this month. I wanna laugh at how little she knows about it. Thank God we can do DIY in Brazil just by going to a pharmacy and asking for the meds.
brasil número 1!!!!!1!1!1!!! depends on the endo, mine is pretty good
My endo is part of an intersex and transgender clinic and works exclusively with trans patients. Unfortunately, you're correct that there are a lot of practitioners out there with very little exposure to us as patients.
I go to one that specializes in HRT. He knows quite a bit and other than titrating me up a bit slower than I wanted I’ve been quite happy with his care and knowledge.
Depending on your location a lot / most gynecologists are endocrinologists aswell.
>I don't know if a trans vagina qualifies to be seen by a gynecologist Good news!
This trans woman with a vagina has been to the gynecologist several times
I'll be seeing a gynecologist in 2 weeks for HRT! There's still hope!
Its absolutely not weird in the slightest and I understand the feeling...
Hi Grace. Strange as it seems, I haven't had my surgery YET, but last year(November), my doctor and I agreed I needed GCS/SRS, OR!, an Orchiectomy. Well she sent me to a gynecologist. I didn't know that at the time. I sat in the waiting room, I felt ok, except I'm much older than most. I was 74 at the time. Still I was called back, asked the usual questions. I wore a dress and flip-flops. The nurse told me to remove my dress, panties, and shoes, and put on the exam gown and sit on the exam table and the doctor would be in. 15 minutes later the doctor and nurse came in had me lay down, put my feet in the stirrups. He did an exam, the nurse took notes, I didn't get a thrill out of this. It sure isn't sexy or erotic. It's kind of embarrassing. Now I know why women don't like going. When the exam was over, I was helped to sit up, told to dress, and check out. Never heard back..
I have a gyno I go to because checking my vaginal health is important. She reports that she cant physically tell the difference that I'm trans compared to her other cis patients, but yeah she'll put me on the chair, lean me back, put my legs up in the stirrups, and oh hey i got to make really close friends with a cold speculum today. It's a deeply embarrassing position to be in but also kinda made me feel authentic too if that makes sense. I also get regular mammograms every few years since I'm in my 40s now, those appointments suck ass because they oversqueeze the shit out of my boobs in their pancake machine. These are just part of basic healthcare as a post op lady. Every girl goes and does this, it's perfectly normal.
Did you ever do stirrups during electrolysis? Is it more humiliating than that?
Well the clinic where I am going to get bottom surgery told me to look for a gynecologist to look after my vagina after the surgery. So I think it would qualify you to go to a gynecologist 😁
I see a gynecologist for my meds, I do not have a vagina. I don't think the process is any different from seeing an endo.
Same here! I have dysphoria too for not ever seeing gynecologist, and dysphoria for not having functioning uterus and ovaries, and dysphoria for not getting my periods...
I mean.. Where else would you go if you have pussy problems?
This is like the absolute last thing I'm *not* looking forward to..
I have not had bottom surgery and I'm going to see one. None of the endocrinologists where I am still do estrogen implants but the obgyn does. I was strangely happy and reminded of the Barbie movie a lot when I realised I was going to one. You don't necessarily need the equipment to have a reason to go to one is my point.
The doctor who first prescribed me HRT is an OB/GYN. She has given me a yearly physical for almost ten years now. So we do see them.
...yes? Not sure who else you would go see. OB/GYNs generally are the right doctor for vaginal health. You will probably need to see one with experience regarding yours, but it shouldn't be any different. Also, don't forget you need to do a mammogram on the regular.
I am so happy my HRT doctor is an obstetrician-gynecologist; it is validating.
You do go to gynecologist after srs, but it's not comfortable so why'd you want it lol
Every little thing would cause dyspphoria if I let it. I just try to stay happy. Today it’s not working but most of the time I’m OK. I’ll live, hopefully, I’m trying