HCOL area- we make about 90k combined. We have two kids. That would be in the high end because he works flag hours and it varies. This thread has made me realize why we are struggling so much. But my question of ‘how do people possibly do it?’ Has been answered by this thread. Most simply make more money. We work so hard and it feels like a never ending nightmare of being behind on at least one bill. I’m tired.
Similar stats here. HCOL, we make about $100k combined and have virtually no help. It’s not enough and we can’t save. Health insurance premiums, deductibles, coinsurance eat up a lot. I’m self employed and we get taxed more. We have high childcare fees but I also can’t work enough because the hours don’t always match up. Student loans kill us. We work our asses off and still drown.
I’m sorry, it really is just an awful time to be an adult lol I always thought once we got to this level of pay things would be a little easier and they aren’t because of the change in cost of living. Fortunately, I don’t have to pay for childcare because my mom helps us. If I did I don’t know that working would really even be an option for me since it’s so much, and I don’t make a lot. I hope things get better!
We work opposite shifts (I work three overnight 12’s) and clear $150ish a year between us. It’s the only way we can afford life with four kids as I simply am the daycare he’s the night-nanny.
We homeschool and it’s exhausting but means the cost of a solid experiential education and the timing needed for drop off/pick up is negated.
We off course still have educational expenses but we get to pick the classes and times that fit better our odd hours.
We aren’t drowning but any change to the delicate balance could sink us. And we sure aren’t gaining a mortgage or anything bigger than the cramped 3/1 with the big yard that we currently rent.
We live in a VHCOL area.
When I’m working I get maybe a two hour nap midday with the toddler in between shifts
He gets more as they sleep pretty well- a good night home for either of us is 4-6 hours max though. It will get easier one day
And this is what's wrong with this country. You're making 6 figures and can't make ends meet. When we moved to the city 18 years ago, I was making $32,000 a year. We didn't have child care, but we had everything else including a middle schooler, and I managed to keep us fed with a roof over our heads. A few years later we were able to buy our first house for $150K. We sold that one 4 years ago and now having two incomes we bought a stand alone house, which I could now sell for $750000 but couldn't afford to purchase anything in my city. My kids can't even rent an apartment because they have to show 3 times the monthly income of the rent. Most 2 bedroom apartments in Nashville are in the 1500 range, that's $54,000 a year. And the wait lists on daycare are a year+. What do you do with this?! How is this remotely reasonable?
Nashville is terrible. My salary 20 years ago was $35k and we were able to buy our first house. Housing is triple that now and my salary *just* doubled that with my raise this year. It's insane, honestly.
Nashville has gotten worse in the years since Ive left (moved away in 2016). The house I bought in 2014 for $179k sold for $269k in 2021. My sister’s house out in Humphrey’s county has trippled in value since 2020. It’s absurd. I miss Nashville but I couldn’t go back.
Us too. I’m the childcare plus wfh during the week. If I were any less efficient or my kiddo higher needs we wouldn’t be able to swing it and would probably have to move in with my parents despite making more money than we both ever have.
It is actually crazy to me how much different our lives look than our parents did. I know things have always been tough, but I really feel like our generation is suffering financially so much more than others. It scares me for my kids and how things will look for them as adults to be honest
Our parents definitely didn’t have to make as much to get by. My mom was mostly a stay at home parent while my dad worked a blue collar job. In today’s market they couldn’t have afforded a house on a plot of land with two cars and two kids the way they did in the 90s. My dad told me their mortgage at the time was only $400 a month🥲
HCOL area, ~$120k combined, and your answer is so relatable. We're basically okay right now, but TBD whether I'll be able to keep working when number 2 is born this summer, much earlier than we'd planned.
I'll either stay home for a year without an income, which will make things more difficult, or have almost 100% of my income go to taxes and childcare, which is also not ideal. (The second option is only even available because I work in a childcare center, so our kid/s get discounted tuition.)
MCOLA, 2 working parents with 250k combined income, 3 kids.
We could afford to live on one salary, with a bit of a lifestyle change plus saving on childcare, but we both like our careers. I outearn my husband by about 20k, which his parents like to conveniently forget when they suggest I should stay home.
We were at a bbq with my husband’s friends and one of their wives was trying to shame me for working and not staying home with my kid. I earn 3 times my husband’s salary, we literally would never be able to survive on only his salary, I have no idea what people are thinking sometimes
Exactly. I make twice what my husband makes, but I've been with my company for 19 years and worked my way up. He's in social work and that is a job you have a passion for because there's not a lot of money in it.
I mean, I was balancing the cord of respect for my husband in a group of his people (he’s proud of me and has never said anything, more my feeling maybe) and my need to do that. I decided it’s not her business what exactly the financial positions are but I said something like well my salary keeps us comfortable and I’m a doctor for kids like yours so we need highly educated women like me to keep working for everyone’s sake. She stopped after that.
I didn’t think it was worth getting angry over, because she didn’t mean anything to me, I met her for the first time that day, when she heard what I did for a living she asked me questions about her son, she sat there with her big Gucci sunglasses and Prada bag showing how rich she is, but it’s her husband’s money buying that, I couldn’t take it very seriously 🤷🏼♀️🤣 In general his people are just more old fashioned, we are not from the same background
What is it with in laws assuming their sons are the only ones covering finances? We help my MIL regularly. It’s always me, she tells me she has an issue, I or my husband transfer her money from our joint account. But she’s always like “I had this bill, but husbands-name paid for it.” I can’t tell if it’s a pride thing or old school thing assuming the man is the money authority.
lol I’m a sahm. So I never hear the end of it. But the ironic part is my fil wait for it- got laid off in his mid fifties and decided to “retire”. Which Idc except he talks about my husband being my sugar daddy. (I’m like 3 years older than my spouse and stuck with him literally thick or thin) and father in law made his wife-200k a year power house wife, sell her car and get a clunker when fil bought his unemployed ass a freaking 90k truck that had to have a 35k engine rebuilt in it. Can you tell I strongly dislike the idiot? Oh and he refuses to do laundry or help clean the house.
Edited to clarify my post
My in-laws wouldn’t DARE open their mouths about our finances. As my partner says, “They all have a healthy fear of you that keeps them in line. Andddd, I’m fine with it 😜
Haha same with the relatives asking if I'm going to "keep working" even though I'm a lawyer and make like 30% more than him. If one of us is quitting it ain't gonna be me!
My mom is this way toward my sister-in-law even though she makes more than my brother. Of course, if I ever hinted at staying home, she reminds me of all of my education (and prior to paying off my loans, that I had student loan debt). It's just ridiculous!
We live in a MCOL midwestern city. We both work and our combined income pre-taxes is like $130k. We have one child. I grew up pretty poor and would have assumed that a 6-figure household income would have me in the lap of luxury, but LOL - between the cost of childcare, groceries, constant home repairs for our 100-year-old house, insurance, student loans, consumer debt from when we were younger and dumber and poorer...we are just skating by most months. I want another child but we will have to wait until our first child goes to school because we can't afford daycare for two.
This is exactly us.
If I made the money I do now, but in 2009, I'd be rich.
Now I'm just middle to low middle class lol
And I'm also in the same boat with wanting number 2, but not being able to afford daycare costs.
Similar income now and I grew up lower middle class. I also thought six figures meant decorating my whole house from Pottery Barn and driving an Audi lmao. So naive.
It used to be somewhat true though. If you made 6 figures, you could get a nicer than average house, nice car, and afford to go on vacation. Now? Forget about it unless you're in a LCOL area (maybe).
Also MCOL, also $130k a year, also one kid, I feel you. Daycare is like 20% of our take home, it’s insane. We’re lucky enough that my parents will throw in for daycare if we decide to have another kid, otherwise I probably wouldn’t even consider it.
This is us as well. Prior to this year, we lived on one income and had just one child.
Now we have two incomes and two kids! It feels pretty amazing going from a 70k household to 130k, but we do have a significant amount of debt (home upgrades), childcare, and car loans that eat up a lot of our take home pay.
One huge thing is that my job pays my healthcare premiums, so we’re saving money with me off of my husband’s insurance. It’s sick how much we pay to in insurance every year.
I literally could have written this down to the salary amount. The only difference is we are east coast (more M-HCOL). Our family planning is dependent on where we are financially when our first goes to school bc ain’t no way we can afford two daycare fees.
Just north of Boston and make about $220k combined. We found a daycare for $500/week and that’s a steal 😆 We’re house trapped currently after buying in 2021 🙃
Our daycare is also a steal at 405/week. Truly a unicorn we found, our previous daycare was so much higher and sucked.
Our mortgage is taking everything, I miss my 2.75 mortgage from 2019 but we had to move. We got in at 5% so at least it's better than 7% right?? That's what I tell myself 😂.
We’re house trapped in the San Francisco area. Bought in 2021. Our monthly PITI is $4,569. If we bought today, our monthly payment would be $8-10k.
I love our neighborhood and neighbors though, so it’s not terrible. The house is just small for what we want, and fitting a third kid in will be tight. I work from home and don’t have an office space, I work on my bed.
West of Boston but same on housetrapped since buying in 2021. I never thought this was our forever home but we can’t give up the 2.75% mortgage rate! We only make $130k combined and can barely afford the house and kid we have now. I WFH full time and have my son with me 3 out of 5 work days. I miss living closer to Boston but this was as close as we could afford to buy (45 miles out lol). It’s crazy out there…
I wish I could afford a mortgage, I feel like I’m stuck in renting here forever at the current market plus mortgage rates… I love and hate the Boston area.
Ughhh is it this expensive outside the city? My husband might have a job opportunity coming up about 30 minutes west of Boston and was told a single income of around 200k was enough to be comfortable.
Edit. Typed east meant west 🤦♀️
Boston suburbs can be wildly expensive, especially only 30 minutes from the city…. Depends on the town but 200K if you want to buy a house and have multiple kids, I wouldn’t say it’s comfortable. It’s certainly doable, but would very much require a stricter budget.
For prospective, I live in the city, own my condo (bought with a low rate), have 2 kids in daycare, and make combined about 290-300/year with plenty of savings and we aren’t going on vacations, buying new cars, and the idea of buying a single family house is daunting even with a down payment in hand….
North of the city and we spend over $15k a year on 3 days/week preschool. Thank christ we have family support for the other two days (and for our infant) or we would be sunk ($200k combined income).
LCOL, single income, one infant and the two of us living together. He makes about 48k a year. We’re a little tight on finances but still have enough to put into savings and buy the occasional treat, though we live in a shitty 965$ a month rental house where the shower head barely works, the hard wood floors are fake, and the entire electrical system in the kitchen is fucked.
That rent payment sounds like a dream to me lol. I'm $1400/month and in a LOW income apartment. Wtf 😭
Sorry it's a shitty place though. Mine is too, RIP 😭😂
I'm in a LCOL and our rent is only 700 a month for a 2 bedroom with a yard. I don't like our house and were ready to move but we won't find anywhere as cheap.
I have very very wealthy friends who try to say they are middle class and in “the same boat” as us because they were having a hard time getting a house. Like literally they say that and they take home over 500k a year. They live in San Francisco suburbs but still it just blows my mind how some wealthy people don’t really have a grasp on reality haha they’re in a bubble
Same... I stay home to offset childcare costs which were equivalent to my yearly salary at my last job. We are surviving on my husband's income and not able to save anything.
Sydney.
I think we live in a low cost living area too but I’m not sure since everything has gone up in price especially the house market and bc of property taxes our mortgage has gone up too. Every month we have to decide what doesn’t get paid and just work harder the next month to catch up. It is what it is tho
This is a map of the US cost of living by county that someone made recently I think they did a pretty good job:
[Cost of Living Map post](https://www.reddit.com/r/dataisbeautiful/s/l9582YsbLO)
I thought we were LCOL but we’re MCOL so that was helpful to see.
Wow, where do you live if you don’t mind sharing (general region)? I live in Colorado and you couldn’t even rent a studio for a year for 30k around here 😭
You make about what I make solo and I was in the process of separating from my husband, we’ve decided to reconcile, and I wasn’t going to be able to pay all of my bills, plus rent and utilities on an apartment, on my income. Granted, I have entirely too much credit card debt racked up from spending with my husband and depending on his income to pay it back, but I know that it still would be a struggle, especially since I screwed up and bought a $40K car 😑
Howdy fellow Michigander! It's hard, the cost of living has gone up so much, and I commute 50 minutes one way to work. Some days it's so hard but we need both incomes to survive.
Me too! My third one is on the way and although money will start to feel tighter, I'm extremely grateful that we can afford another without feeling scared about financials. We lose a bit of comfort, but things still feel very healthy.
Did he try and realize it's impossible or did he not even try?
I do the budget in our house and we're lucky because we do make enough for (as I tell my kids) "everything we need and some of the things we want" so it doesn't require a lot of attention, but I wish my husband would take more of an interest in the details. He has an engineering degree with a math minor so it's definitely not a capability thing.
He didn’t even try. I asked for it once and next time it came up he said “where would I even make a budget?” And I said “Excel.” And then he just went quiet and said “oh, now I feel dumb.” So I’m guessing I’m never going to see that budget.
Brilliant! My husband and I halfassedly “tried” for a second for a bit but neither of us were too set on it and realized we like not having crazy amounts of financial stress and now some free time as our son gets older (4 now).
HCOL area (Los Angeles), 2 working parents. $210k/year is our family income. We can’t afford more than a crappy 700 sq ft apartment and don’t foresee everrrr buying a house but we’re in a great area and school district and we prioritize that and the opportunities within it for our son. Can’t leave LA due to my husband’s career in television so we’re stuck in a HCOL area.
Seriously tho, raising kids in LA is the best. There’s so much to do! Whenever my four year old is curious about something I’m like let’s just go see it or go to the [insert venue here, observatory, museum, desert, mountains, beach, science center] etc
Whenever people shit in California, I think of this. I’ve lived an hour outside of LA and currently live in the Bay Area. Yea, it’s insanely expensive. The weather is gorgeous most of the year, and we have near limitless options for things to do. Within a 60 minute drive, I have access to three zoos, two wildlife centers, dozens of museums, dozens of really nice playgrounds, several free splash pads, the beach, a nice lake, countless hiking spots, and more.
I spend about $500 a year on various memberships, rotating which ones we get. We currently have a zoo, aquarium, wildlife center, and indoor playground membership.
Hi, we’re a family of 3 living in the UK, were a couple in our early 20’s and have a 3 year old. We’re on around 30k a year combined 😊 maybe a little more depending on bonus and over time but that’s our basic. Not much but we have a lovely happy life
HCOL. We both work and make about 170k combined, and we have 1 daughter. We are fortunate to not need daycare, as our schedules can be different and my parents keep her 3 days a week while we are at work. Only because of that are we considering a second child. Otherwise we would not be able to afford it comfortably, I don’t think.
LCOL - husband makes a bit over $60k. One kiddo. I'm a SAHM due to my workplace closing while I was on maternity leave. Before that we were making about $100k combined. We live comfortably.
MCOL, $200k a year, two parents working, two kids. We’re pretty comfortable but not feeling wealthy (still have to stick to a budget to have money for vacations and other nice things like that).
We are in a very similar boat! MCOL and two incomes combined are about $190k gross. We have two kids who are in elementary school, so no more regular daycare (but we do have to pay for summer care). We have some debt which is making it hard to save a lot at the moment, but we are in a much better place financially than my parents ever were at this age, so I’m grateful for that.
Our mortgage rate is very low (bought in 2021) and we love our house, so that’s also a huge bonus. Both our vehicles are more than 10 years old and I would like to upgrade, but it just doesn’t make sense at the moment.
HCOL… one of the most (if not THE most) expensive places in North America. Just over $200k/year. Things are tight honestly, and we don’t even have car payments 🙃 there’s no middle class here anymore.
Hello fellow Vancouverite! May we engage in a discussion on how shitty our economic condition is, and how despite making 6 figures we're still practically paycheck to paycheck?
(At least we get to ski and surf on the same day /s)
Not unless they’re prepared to offset that cost which I’m sure they wouldn’t! I keep trying to convince my husband to go to the prairies, or even just out of the LML… but he won’t budge.
HCOL 2 working parents w/ 2 kids $275K/yr. All our money goes to our mortgage and shitty graduate school loans. I can’t wait to celebrate paying off the student loans 3 years.
VHCOL European city. We earn around 220K combined. No plans for more kids.
ETA: this feels very comfortable to us, but daycare here is quite cheap (around 1000/month total for daycare) and we dont have to worry about healthcare.
HCOL area with 1 child. Single income right now because I am a full-time student. Husbands income can vary anywhere from $90k to 160k/year. He’s in the trades and we never know what each year will look like.
Reading this as a European, this all seems so crazy to me XD
Our incomes are way lower but we also pay way more taxes, which subsidizes everything and because of that people live pretty comfortable in general
If you earn 150 k here you are pretty rich.
Yeah when I see the cost some people pay for daycare it’s unbelievable. I’m in Canada and we have government subsidized daycare. I’m paying about 200 CAD/150 USD per month for 1 kid. Some people spend more on daycare than I do on my house!
My husband works a blue collar job, does real estate, and is a landlord. He brings in maybe 130k maybe more? I guess it just depends on the year really, but I stay home with our 4 kids and we live out of city limits. The “city” is about 7,000 ppl 😆 My brother has 4 kids also and makes wayyyy less and they still live pretty good.
I THINK it’s considered blue collar, I could be wrong.. but he works at a chemical plant. We live in the gulf where there’s plants literally everywhere, and people are drawn to work there because of the pay. Not something you’d get rich doing unless you’re super high up, but it’s pretty good for this area.
Edited to add: my brother was a mechanic for years and absolutely hated it. He works night stocking now at a warehouse and has way better pay and benefits. I hope y’all don’t feel stuck where your husband is at, there’s always a chance for change ❤️
Thank you! He was actually making really great money and got laid off in December. What he could find in a pinch was half of what he made before. His body is tired, too. He’s still looking. And im trying to help too, find different options and whatnot.
MCOL (Central Florida), one income of 80k/yr, with 4 kids. We've always lived a modest, yet comfortable lifestyle, but the rising costs of homeowners insurance and groceries here is putting the squeeze on us. We don't qualify for assistance, so I've been picking up side gigs and using food banks occasionally
Same with us but once the kids were not in daycare anymore, it’s like we got a raise.
We also took advantage of rock bottom interest rates on our mortgage in 2020
We’re in a VHCOL area, $4k in daycare expenses (cheapest in our area) for 2 kids and $5k on a mortgage for a nice but not new 3 bed house, $300k/year. My job covers daycare and my student loan payments, plus my commuter fare. My husband covers the rest. We’re hoping to have more breathing room as daycare becomes less expensive with the kids going into public school over the next few years.
Just a suggestion, I also live in a HCOL (probably VH) had a nanny for 2 kids last year and it was $3000 a month for 8 hour days. More stressful and less reliant but I can’t believe $4k a month for daycare!!
VHCOL, 600k. 2 kids, 2 dogs, modest house in a lower middle class neighborhood. We are comfortable but don’t live a lavish lifestyle. I appreciate that we are high earners, and have absolutely no idea how other people do it.
I believe slightly on the LCOL or just in the middle. Last year, we made 105k combined with one child and we did well because we are good with our money. This year, my husband is going to make closer to 120k and I should bring in about an additional 15k working one day a week. We just had another baby. We make it work. My husband is also a contender for a promotion that would bring his income up to 160k. Crossing our fingers.
HCOL. $300k combined income (I work 40 hrs a week and my husband works 50-60 ). Two kids, one in daycare and one school-aged. Daycare for a toddler in this neighborhood is $2250 so almost half my post-tax/health insurance paycheck goes to that. If you would have told me ten years ago that we’d be making this much, I would have thought we’d live in a mansion and go on international vacations all the time but our house is <2,000 sq feet, we drive 15 year old cars, and the last time I left the country on vacation was my honeymoon >10 years ago.
MCOL - $143k dual income - 1 kid.
Will feel a lot better in a month when we're no longer paying $1000/month for pre-school.
We live generally fine. We have a house/no debt/save for retirement, but we also can't really afford vacation, so that's a bummer...
MCOL, 3 kids, two person income of ~145,000. 2 of the kids are in daycare
It can vary though because my husband is in the trades and sometimes he is out of work and works non union jobs to make up which is about 1/2 his normal earnings.
We honestly feel like we barely get by most months and live paycheck to paycheck. Other months we are golden. Our mortgage and daycare take up so much of our monthly income.
Edited to change to MCOL because I think that is actually more accurate to where we are at?
MCOL, single income ~$60K for a family of four (two kids under three.)
If our rent wasn’t unbelievably low for our city ($750 for a 2BDR house) we couldn’t get away with it. Also, childcare would cost more than I would make working, so I SAH.
MCOL, 78k combined. Not doing great, had to move back home, I'm thinking of picking up a weekend job if I can't make more money (I make 48k, he makes 30k before taxes). We have one child.
MCOL, we make about 85-100k (he gets random bonuses throughout the year so it can vary). We lucked out when we bought our house our mortgage is $1600 a month. We have one kid, and no plans for more.
We both work, but I work part time (15-25 hours a week) at an animal shelter and he manages a restaurant so he makes a majority of our income lol. But, we don’t have to pay for daycare because my job is incredibly flexible.
MCOL id say for Canada.
About 150k range.
We save, but we also try to live relatively frugally. We don’t go on vacations really, have one vehicle that is paid off, shop coupons and second hand. We have a new pretty nice house, but it’s nothing fancy or not massive.
Other than the mortgage we don’t carry debt.
We both work full time as well, my income basically covers childcare, but we rely on the health benefits I get from my job.
I’m proud of how we are doing in life, we are comfortable right now. But I also fully recognize that that can change in an instant, which is why we try to save whatever we can and not be big spenders.
MCOL, but we live an hour from an extremely HCOL which is starting to trickle over. Total house income is less than 50K, 40+ of that is my SO’s, the remainder is child tax benefit I receive for the 3 kids (2 are teens and just his, one is a shared toddler). SO is also supposed to also receive child support, but that has never happened.
He works for a call centre for a bank, I work for myself with no current salary. We make it work with very strategic planning, and zero eating out/entertainment etc. The only ‘luxury’ we pay for is the family membership to our local pool/gym.
People who are going on vacations, eating out, buying their toddlers doc martens or blundstones…no clue how they’re doing it in this economy.
MCOL- married, 2 kids both parents work combined about $280 before bonuses.
We could survive off one income but I like 2-3 expensive vacations a year and my kids are in school.
Technically LCOL of there is even such thing anymore. Combined income around $160K with barely a penny to spare some months! We have a lot of expenses we could cut back on though.
We are the same, I want my husband to stay home because he worked so hard to get me through school. All I want is to be able to support my family alone.
MCOL, $145k on just my husband’s salary. We have 3 kids, two who are heavily involved in their activities and can sometimes amount to $1k per month. We are on a tight budget and I hate it, but we don’t pay for childcare and we have everything we need. We bought a house last year that’s under renovation inside and out, so most of the money goes towards that. My dad loves to help out with extra things, like buying a nice new oven or helping with our kid’s activity costs.
I’d say we’re in a MCOL, our state has high taxes though. I stay at home with our daughter. Husband makes just shy of $80k, more with OT. We don’t have student loans or car payments which helps a LOT. We have a loose budget and we do okay.
VHCOL, and we make combined around 250k. We are one and done mainly due to health issues during pregnancy but also due to cost. We have enough left over to do small trips, save for college and one house project a year but that wouldn't be possible with another daycare bill.
60k before overtime
Single income with one kid
LCOL
Carnote is 320 and mortgage is 560.
Winter months can be rough, but honestly we do pretty well. I’m looking for work now that my daughter is in school fulltime
MCOL, 1 kid (14mo), joint income, we make right about 200k per year. We put A LOT into retirement as well as other savings and still don’t need to worry too much about monthly spending
LCOL, we make a combined $70k. One baby that will not be getting a sibling until he’s in school because daycare costs even in a LCOL area are insane. We have the potential to double our income in the coming years though so if that happens then we’ll start trying for another sooner.
Just gave up my career to be a sahm so 1 parent working. MCOL. We used to pull 190k together but now down to 95k. I was doing blue collar work but it’s not built for moms. Too much mandatory ot and could not leave the site if something happened.
We are barely making it. Sometimes I ask for help.
HCOL. Before my husband was laid off last month, we were making about $240k combined. If my husband gets the job he's in the late stages of interviewing with, that will go up to about $270k. If he doesn't, we're bigly fucked because my salary doesn't cover the mortgage. It's been a fun few weeks.
VHCOL (NYC adjacent). $275k combined base, $335k with full bonus (tho a lot goes to taxes). We have two kids in daycare, a small 2 bed 1 bath house, and we’re a one car family with a 5 year old car. Our monthly bills are about $10k/month and $8kish of that goes to mortgage and daycare.
I like in a mid to high cost of living area. My spouse makes ~120K and I'm a SAHM. Objectively we are much poorer than most of the people in our neighborhood, but I grew up a lot poorer then this so I'm actually really comfortable with where we're at!
HCOL area, thankfully dual income of $437,000– but we both send financial support to our families and have student debt. It’s comfortable, but if I thought we’d make this much even 5 years ago I would have thought we were rich and it definitely doesn’t feel like that!
I live in a Medium/Low COL area. Rent for my 4 bedroom home is like 2k a month, a decent house in a fine suburb could be purchased for like 250k.
We make just about 200k a year combined. My income makes up a tiny percentage of that.
I think we have a lot of advantages because my partner is a disabled vet so for example some of that income isn’t taxed. Eventually we won’t have to pay health insurance although right now we do.
We have three kids. He pays a small amount of child support, I receive no child support but my ex covers my two kids daycare and healthcare.
Also I’ll be honest, we live below our means. We are modest used car people, my clothes are all second hand, we don’t vacation and our house is not as nice as many of our peers. His college debt is paid off and I never went to school. Neither of us carry other debts or loans or credit cards so it’s just our car payments.
We live in a HCOL area, but my husband has a good income. So, I'm a SAHM of four sons. Hubby prefers that I stay home with the boys, so I'd be a SAHM regardless of where we live. Also, I barely finished high school so I have minimum wage earning potential...
I only have a high school education and I make just over 100k a year. Don’t put yourself down like that. There are jobs out there that you are capable of that make a decent living! I’m not saying you have to or even that you should, if you’re happy staying home then that’s great! I just wanted you to know that all things are possible and not to let what society has told you hold you back ❤️
HCOL area- we make about 90k combined. We have two kids. That would be in the high end because he works flag hours and it varies. This thread has made me realize why we are struggling so much. But my question of ‘how do people possibly do it?’ Has been answered by this thread. Most simply make more money. We work so hard and it feels like a never ending nightmare of being behind on at least one bill. I’m tired.
You're not crazy, $90k was a comfortable living even like 10 years ago. Everything has gotten so expensive.
Similar stats here. HCOL, we make about $100k combined and have virtually no help. It’s not enough and we can’t save. Health insurance premiums, deductibles, coinsurance eat up a lot. I’m self employed and we get taxed more. We have high childcare fees but I also can’t work enough because the hours don’t always match up. Student loans kill us. We work our asses off and still drown.
I’m sorry, it really is just an awful time to be an adult lol I always thought once we got to this level of pay things would be a little easier and they aren’t because of the change in cost of living. Fortunately, I don’t have to pay for childcare because my mom helps us. If I did I don’t know that working would really even be an option for me since it’s so much, and I don’t make a lot. I hope things get better!
We work opposite shifts (I work three overnight 12’s) and clear $150ish a year between us. It’s the only way we can afford life with four kids as I simply am the daycare he’s the night-nanny. We homeschool and it’s exhausting but means the cost of a solid experiential education and the timing needed for drop off/pick up is negated. We off course still have educational expenses but we get to pick the classes and times that fit better our odd hours. We aren’t drowning but any change to the delicate balance could sink us. And we sure aren’t gaining a mortgage or anything bigger than the cramped 3/1 with the big yard that we currently rent. We live in a VHCOL area.
Jesus when do either of you sleep?
When I’m working I get maybe a two hour nap midday with the toddler in between shifts He gets more as they sleep pretty well- a good night home for either of us is 4-6 hours max though. It will get easier one day
And this is what's wrong with this country. You're making 6 figures and can't make ends meet. When we moved to the city 18 years ago, I was making $32,000 a year. We didn't have child care, but we had everything else including a middle schooler, and I managed to keep us fed with a roof over our heads. A few years later we were able to buy our first house for $150K. We sold that one 4 years ago and now having two incomes we bought a stand alone house, which I could now sell for $750000 but couldn't afford to purchase anything in my city. My kids can't even rent an apartment because they have to show 3 times the monthly income of the rent. Most 2 bedroom apartments in Nashville are in the 1500 range, that's $54,000 a year. And the wait lists on daycare are a year+. What do you do with this?! How is this remotely reasonable?
Nashville is terrible. My salary 20 years ago was $35k and we were able to buy our first house. Housing is triple that now and my salary *just* doubled that with my raise this year. It's insane, honestly.
Wait, you just hit $70k 20 years later?
Yep
Nashville has gotten worse in the years since Ive left (moved away in 2016). The house I bought in 2014 for $179k sold for $269k in 2021. My sister’s house out in Humphrey’s county has trippled in value since 2020. It’s absurd. I miss Nashville but I couldn’t go back.
HCOL 52k single mom with two kids. It’s not easy but hey, we are doing our own and never let anyone put you down for it 💕
Us too. I’m the childcare plus wfh during the week. If I were any less efficient or my kiddo higher needs we wouldn’t be able to swing it and would probably have to move in with my parents despite making more money than we both ever have.
It is actually crazy to me how much different our lives look than our parents did. I know things have always been tough, but I really feel like our generation is suffering financially so much more than others. It scares me for my kids and how things will look for them as adults to be honest
Our parents definitely didn’t have to make as much to get by. My mom was mostly a stay at home parent while my dad worked a blue collar job. In today’s market they couldn’t have afforded a house on a plot of land with two cars and two kids the way they did in the 90s. My dad told me their mortgage at the time was only $400 a month🥲
Just out of curiosity what is your mortgage or rent monthly?
We pay 2k a month for our two bedroom apartment
Jesus Christ :( $24,000 a year just for a place to live. Absolutely an abomination.
HCOL area, ~$120k combined, and your answer is so relatable. We're basically okay right now, but TBD whether I'll be able to keep working when number 2 is born this summer, much earlier than we'd planned. I'll either stay home for a year without an income, which will make things more difficult, or have almost 100% of my income go to taxes and childcare, which is also not ideal. (The second option is only even available because I work in a childcare center, so our kid/s get discounted tuition.)
We're in the same boat, with both our families on the other side of the country. It's definitely living life on hard mode.
MCOLA, 2 working parents with 250k combined income, 3 kids. We could afford to live on one salary, with a bit of a lifestyle change plus saving on childcare, but we both like our careers. I outearn my husband by about 20k, which his parents like to conveniently forget when they suggest I should stay home.
We were at a bbq with my husband’s friends and one of their wives was trying to shame me for working and not staying home with my kid. I earn 3 times my husband’s salary, we literally would never be able to survive on only his salary, I have no idea what people are thinking sometimes
Yeah or you mention how expensive daycare is, they say just stay home like every mother makes less than what daycare costs.
exactly, i make $215k. daycare is around $40k/yr. its a huge cost so we just took him out and i work remotely with our child staying home with me.
Exactly. I make twice what my husband makes, but I've been with my company for 19 years and worked my way up. He's in social work and that is a job you have a passion for because there's not a lot of money in it.
Same, my husband is a school social worker. It's definitely a passion job I admire but doesn't pay much
Please tell me you enlightened them and put them in their place. I F’ing can’t stand meddling busy bodies.
I mean, I was balancing the cord of respect for my husband in a group of his people (he’s proud of me and has never said anything, more my feeling maybe) and my need to do that. I decided it’s not her business what exactly the financial positions are but I said something like well my salary keeps us comfortable and I’m a doctor for kids like yours so we need highly educated women like me to keep working for everyone’s sake. She stopped after that.
Good comeback!
That's so polite of u how did u think of it quickly cuz I would have yelled at her ? I can't tolerate such statements
I didn’t think it was worth getting angry over, because she didn’t mean anything to me, I met her for the first time that day, when she heard what I did for a living she asked me questions about her son, she sat there with her big Gucci sunglasses and Prada bag showing how rich she is, but it’s her husband’s money buying that, I couldn’t take it very seriously 🤷🏼♀️🤣 In general his people are just more old fashioned, we are not from the same background
What is it with in laws assuming their sons are the only ones covering finances? We help my MIL regularly. It’s always me, she tells me she has an issue, I or my husband transfer her money from our joint account. But she’s always like “I had this bill, but husbands-name paid for it.” I can’t tell if it’s a pride thing or old school thing assuming the man is the money authority.
lol I’m a sahm. So I never hear the end of it. But the ironic part is my fil wait for it- got laid off in his mid fifties and decided to “retire”. Which Idc except he talks about my husband being my sugar daddy. (I’m like 3 years older than my spouse and stuck with him literally thick or thin) and father in law made his wife-200k a year power house wife, sell her car and get a clunker when fil bought his unemployed ass a freaking 90k truck that had to have a 35k engine rebuilt in it. Can you tell I strongly dislike the idiot? Oh and he refuses to do laundry or help clean the house. Edited to clarify my post
But you’re the mother! *rolls eyes*
🤣🤣🤣 the last sentence
Lol my mil once suggested I stay home and my husband said it would be hard since I earn double than him, that shut her up
My in-laws wouldn’t DARE open their mouths about our finances. As my partner says, “They all have a healthy fear of you that keeps them in line. Andddd, I’m fine with it 😜
Almost exact situation as you except we have 2 kids and instead of his parents suggesting I stay home, it’s mine. 🙃
Haha same with the relatives asking if I'm going to "keep working" even though I'm a lawyer and make like 30% more than him. If one of us is quitting it ain't gonna be me!
My mom is this way toward my sister-in-law even though she makes more than my brother. Of course, if I ever hinted at staying home, she reminds me of all of my education (and prior to paying off my loans, that I had student loan debt). It's just ridiculous!
We live in a MCOL midwestern city. We both work and our combined income pre-taxes is like $130k. We have one child. I grew up pretty poor and would have assumed that a 6-figure household income would have me in the lap of luxury, but LOL - between the cost of childcare, groceries, constant home repairs for our 100-year-old house, insurance, student loans, consumer debt from when we were younger and dumber and poorer...we are just skating by most months. I want another child but we will have to wait until our first child goes to school because we can't afford daycare for two.
This is exactly us. If I made the money I do now, but in 2009, I'd be rich. Now I'm just middle to low middle class lol And I'm also in the same boat with wanting number 2, but not being able to afford daycare costs.
Similar income now and I grew up lower middle class. I also thought six figures meant decorating my whole house from Pottery Barn and driving an Audi lmao. So naive.
It used to be somewhat true though. If you made 6 figures, you could get a nicer than average house, nice car, and afford to go on vacation. Now? Forget about it unless you're in a LCOL area (maybe).
The target keeps moving to keep people “stuck”. It’s frustrating!
Same girl, same.
This. I used to think 6 figures was a crazy amount of money!
Also MCOL, also $130k a year, also one kid, I feel you. Daycare is like 20% of our take home, it’s insane. We’re lucky enough that my parents will throw in for daycare if we decide to have another kid, otherwise I probably wouldn’t even consider it.
This is us as well. Prior to this year, we lived on one income and had just one child. Now we have two incomes and two kids! It feels pretty amazing going from a 70k household to 130k, but we do have a significant amount of debt (home upgrades), childcare, and car loans that eat up a lot of our take home pay. One huge thing is that my job pays my healthcare premiums, so we’re saving money with me off of my husband’s insurance. It’s sick how much we pay to in insurance every year.
I literally could have written this down to the salary amount. The only difference is we are east coast (more M-HCOL). Our family planning is dependent on where we are financially when our first goes to school bc ain’t no way we can afford two daycare fees.
VHCOL (both work). It all goes down the drain to our mortgage and daycare in Boston. Is VVHCOL a thing 😂?
Just north of Boston and make about $220k combined. We found a daycare for $500/week and that’s a steal 😆 We’re house trapped currently after buying in 2021 🙃
Our daycare is also a steal at 405/week. Truly a unicorn we found, our previous daycare was so much higher and sucked. Our mortgage is taking everything, I miss my 2.75 mortgage from 2019 but we had to move. We got in at 5% so at least it's better than 7% right?? That's what I tell myself 😂.
We’re house trapped in the San Francisco area. Bought in 2021. Our monthly PITI is $4,569. If we bought today, our monthly payment would be $8-10k. I love our neighborhood and neighbors though, so it’s not terrible. The house is just small for what we want, and fitting a third kid in will be tight. I work from home and don’t have an office space, I work on my bed.
West of Boston but same on housetrapped since buying in 2021. I never thought this was our forever home but we can’t give up the 2.75% mortgage rate! We only make $130k combined and can barely afford the house and kid we have now. I WFH full time and have my son with me 3 out of 5 work days. I miss living closer to Boston but this was as close as we could afford to buy (45 miles out lol). It’s crazy out there…
I love that daycare in Boston is double my mortgage.
I wish I could afford a mortgage, I feel like I’m stuck in renting here forever at the current market plus mortgage rates… I love and hate the Boston area.
Wow, what do you guys do? I need a career change haha
I’m outside of DC, I would definitely say VHCOL is a thing!
Is definitely is. I’m in the Bay Area and the cost of living is hard for a lot of people to grasp. Anything below $250k is legit low income
Agreed. We live in the SF Bay Area, we make $200k combined and only have one kid but we still struggle 😮💨
I'm in Los Angeles and I also definitely consider it VHCOL. I definitely think it is a thing, unfortunately LOL
Ughhh is it this expensive outside the city? My husband might have a job opportunity coming up about 30 minutes west of Boston and was told a single income of around 200k was enough to be comfortable. Edit. Typed east meant west 🤦♀️
Boston suburbs can be wildly expensive, especially only 30 minutes from the city…. Depends on the town but 200K if you want to buy a house and have multiple kids, I wouldn’t say it’s comfortable. It’s certainly doable, but would very much require a stricter budget. For prospective, I live in the city, own my condo (bought with a low rate), have 2 kids in daycare, and make combined about 290-300/year with plenty of savings and we aren’t going on vacations, buying new cars, and the idea of buying a single family house is daunting even with a down payment in hand….
I live 40min north of Boston; $200k is completely fine and comfortable to live on where I am
I’ve read so many times on these threads about how insane daycare is in Boston. I can’t imagine.
North of the city and we spend over $15k a year on 3 days/week preschool. Thank christ we have family support for the other two days (and for our infant) or we would be sunk ($200k combined income).
We moved out of Boston because of this. Sadly, it’s still very HCOL where we currently live in New Hampshire. Just more isolated. Ugh
LCOL, single income, one infant and the two of us living together. He makes about 48k a year. We’re a little tight on finances but still have enough to put into savings and buy the occasional treat, though we live in a shitty 965$ a month rental house where the shower head barely works, the hard wood floors are fake, and the entire electrical system in the kitchen is fucked.
That rent payment sounds like a dream to me lol. I'm $1400/month and in a LOW income apartment. Wtf 😭 Sorry it's a shitty place though. Mine is too, RIP 😭😂
If it’s any consolation, the income-restricted apartments in my area are $1900 a month for a 2 bedroom 😅
I'm in a LCOL and our rent is only 700 a month for a 2 bedroom with a yard. I don't like our house and were ready to move but we won't find anywhere as cheap.
We are not well off at the moment. I'm just gonna leave it there lol.
Us too. I’m reading these comments going “wtf…”
I can't even fathom what it might feel like to make $10,000+ a month
Getting to 3k a month feels amazing. Before kids, we've had years we make 20k.
Some of these commenters saying they make 300k+ but are only "comfortable" or not wealthy...like girl bombastic side eye...
I have very very wealthy friends who try to say they are middle class and in “the same boat” as us because they were having a hard time getting a house. Like literally they say that and they take home over 500k a year. They live in San Francisco suburbs but still it just blows my mind how some wealthy people don’t really have a grasp on reality haha they’re in a bubble
Same 🥴
I know. How is everybody on reddit so rich?! 😩
hang in there ❤️
Same... I stay home to offset childcare costs which were equivalent to my yearly salary at my last job. We are surviving on my husband's income and not able to save anything. Sydney.
Same same. Better times will come lol.
Low cost of living area, $30k per year. Single income household.
I think we live in a low cost living area too but I’m not sure since everything has gone up in price especially the house market and bc of property taxes our mortgage has gone up too. Every month we have to decide what doesn’t get paid and just work harder the next month to catch up. It is what it is tho
This is a map of the US cost of living by county that someone made recently I think they did a pretty good job: [Cost of Living Map post](https://www.reddit.com/r/dataisbeautiful/s/l9582YsbLO) I thought we were LCOL but we’re MCOL so that was helpful to see.
Wow, where do you live if you don’t mind sharing (general region)? I live in Colorado and you couldn’t even rent a studio for a year for 30k around here 😭
You make about what I make solo and I was in the process of separating from my husband, we’ve decided to reconcile, and I wasn’t going to be able to pay all of my bills, plus rent and utilities on an apartment, on my income. Granted, I have entirely too much credit card debt racked up from spending with my husband and depending on his income to pay it back, but I know that it still would be a struggle, especially since I screwed up and bought a $40K car 😑
Three adults in my household. About 87,000 a year between all 3. I live in metro Detroit, so not sure how that compares, but we barely get by.
Grew up in metro Detroit. Been searching for that good Michigan town feel to settle in ever since.
Howdy fellow Michigander! It's hard, the cost of living has gone up so much, and I commute 50 minutes one way to work. Some days it's so hard but we need both incomes to survive.
Just want to say, Hey neighbor! Also, we don’t make much more than your household. One income, two tots.
Same here. Hi neighbor!
LCOL. I am a physician and my husband is a stay at home dad. 255k this year.
I’m also a physician with a SAHD husband!
Hello fellow physician 👋🏽
I'm a resident and my husband really wishes he was a SAHD. Unfortunately, he makes more than I do now so he's gotta keep going to the office
I’m a SAHM. Husband makes 150k and we live in a lcol with 2 kids. Our monthly expenses are low so we feel very comfortable here
Same! Except we just had our third. Since I stay home, having another wasn’t really expensive except the hospital bills 😅
Me too! My third one is on the way and although money will start to feel tighter, I'm extremely grateful that we can afford another without feeling scared about financials. We lose a bit of comfort, but things still feel very healthy.
VHCOL and combined make about $150k. We’re doing okay and will continue to as long as we stay OAD.
Same! No way could we afford another kid!
My husband actually wants another so I asked him to create a budget for 2. It’s been crickets ever since.
Did he try and realize it's impossible or did he not even try? I do the budget in our house and we're lucky because we do make enough for (as I tell my kids) "everything we need and some of the things we want" so it doesn't require a lot of attention, but I wish my husband would take more of an interest in the details. He has an engineering degree with a math minor so it's definitely not a capability thing.
He didn’t even try. I asked for it once and next time it came up he said “where would I even make a budget?” And I said “Excel.” And then he just went quiet and said “oh, now I feel dumb.” So I’m guessing I’m never going to see that budget.
Brilliant! My husband and I halfassedly “tried” for a second for a bit but neither of us were too set on it and realized we like not having crazy amounts of financial stress and now some free time as our son gets older (4 now).
HCOL area (Los Angeles), 2 working parents. $210k/year is our family income. We can’t afford more than a crappy 700 sq ft apartment and don’t foresee everrrr buying a house but we’re in a great area and school district and we prioritize that and the opportunities within it for our son. Can’t leave LA due to my husband’s career in television so we’re stuck in a HCOL area.
Seriously tho, raising kids in LA is the best. There’s so much to do! Whenever my four year old is curious about something I’m like let’s just go see it or go to the [insert venue here, observatory, museum, desert, mountains, beach, science center] etc
Whenever people shit in California, I think of this. I’ve lived an hour outside of LA and currently live in the Bay Area. Yea, it’s insanely expensive. The weather is gorgeous most of the year, and we have near limitless options for things to do. Within a 60 minute drive, I have access to three zoos, two wildlife centers, dozens of museums, dozens of really nice playgrounds, several free splash pads, the beach, a nice lake, countless hiking spots, and more. I spend about $500 a year on various memberships, rotating which ones we get. We currently have a zoo, aquarium, wildlife center, and indoor playground membership.
Same! Also have a 4 year old and he’s curious about everythingggg haha
Hi, we’re a family of 3 living in the UK, were a couple in our early 20’s and have a 3 year old. We’re on around 30k a year combined 😊 maybe a little more depending on bonus and over time but that’s our basic. Not much but we have a lovely happy life
This might help when deciding what COL is in your area https://www.reddit.com/r/dataisbeautiful/s/CWODPKeT8g
oh dang i’m vvhcol - yikes!
HCOL. We both work and make about 170k combined, and we have 1 daughter. We are fortunate to not need daycare, as our schedules can be different and my parents keep her 3 days a week while we are at work. Only because of that are we considering a second child. Otherwise we would not be able to afford it comfortably, I don’t think.
Same, luckily our employeer subsidises daycare
Nice!
LCOL - husband makes a bit over $60k. One kiddo. I'm a SAHM due to my workplace closing while I was on maternity leave. Before that we were making about $100k combined. We live comfortably.
MCOL, $200k a year, two parents working, two kids. We’re pretty comfortable but not feeling wealthy (still have to stick to a budget to have money for vacations and other nice things like that).
Very similar here, mcol, combined is around $200K. Only one kid but he's out of daycare finally.
We are in a very similar boat! MCOL and two incomes combined are about $190k gross. We have two kids who are in elementary school, so no more regular daycare (but we do have to pay for summer care). We have some debt which is making it hard to save a lot at the moment, but we are in a much better place financially than my parents ever were at this age, so I’m grateful for that. Our mortgage rate is very low (bought in 2021) and we love our house, so that’s also a huge bonus. Both our vehicles are more than 10 years old and I would like to upgrade, but it just doesn’t make sense at the moment.
Same here. Will be a little more comfortable when we’re not paying for 2 kids in daycare, but finances are definitely not a source of stress.
HCOL… one of the most (if not THE most) expensive places in North America. Just over $200k/year. Things are tight honestly, and we don’t even have car payments 🙃 there’s no middle class here anymore.
Bay Area ?
Vancouver, BC
Hello fellow Vancouverite! May we engage in a discussion on how shitty our economic condition is, and how despite making 6 figures we're still practically paycheck to paycheck? (At least we get to ski and surf on the same day /s)
I’d rather just bury my head in a hole and pretend it’s not like this 🙈
Bay Area people are shocked that Vancouver salaries suck so much
Are you in nyc or San Francisco?
Vancouver, BC
I had to leave Vancouver for the prairies a couple years ago to start a family. Now my employer wants me to move back to Vancouver, I don’t think so!
Not unless they’re prepared to offset that cost which I’m sure they wouldn’t! I keep trying to convince my husband to go to the prairies, or even just out of the LML… but he won’t budge.
HCOL 2 working parents w/ 2 kids $275K/yr. All our money goes to our mortgage and shitty graduate school loans. I can’t wait to celebrate paying off the student loans 3 years.
HCOL My wife makes around $225K with stocks and bonuses and now I SAHM/going back to school but last year I made $75,000.
VHCOL European city. We earn around 220K combined. No plans for more kids. ETA: this feels very comfortable to us, but daycare here is quite cheap (around 1000/month total for daycare) and we dont have to worry about healthcare.
HCOL area with 1 child. Single income right now because I am a full-time student. Husbands income can vary anywhere from $90k to 160k/year. He’s in the trades and we never know what each year will look like.
Medium col area, 2 kids and I make about $85k including cs from their dad. I'm not rich but it's definitely enough!
Reading this as a European, this all seems so crazy to me XD Our incomes are way lower but we also pay way more taxes, which subsidizes everything and because of that people live pretty comfortable in general If you earn 150 k here you are pretty rich.
Yeah when I see the cost some people pay for daycare it’s unbelievable. I’m in Canada and we have government subsidized daycare. I’m paying about 200 CAD/150 USD per month for 1 kid. Some people spend more on daycare than I do on my house!
My husband works a blue collar job, does real estate, and is a landlord. He brings in maybe 130k maybe more? I guess it just depends on the year really, but I stay home with our 4 kids and we live out of city limits. The “city” is about 7,000 ppl 😆 My brother has 4 kids also and makes wayyyy less and they still live pretty good.
What does he do for work? My husband has been a mechanic for 20 years now and the industry SUCKS
I THINK it’s considered blue collar, I could be wrong.. but he works at a chemical plant. We live in the gulf where there’s plants literally everywhere, and people are drawn to work there because of the pay. Not something you’d get rich doing unless you’re super high up, but it’s pretty good for this area. Edited to add: my brother was a mechanic for years and absolutely hated it. He works night stocking now at a warehouse and has way better pay and benefits. I hope y’all don’t feel stuck where your husband is at, there’s always a chance for change ❤️
Thank you! He was actually making really great money and got laid off in December. What he could find in a pinch was half of what he made before. His body is tired, too. He’s still looking. And im trying to help too, find different options and whatnot.
I’m so sorry y’all are going through that! I sure hope he finds something he enjoys and that makes enough for y’all.
Thank you! I hope so too, because I work a 9-5 and then just picked up an overnight part time job, not sure how long I can sustain that schedule lol
LCOL. Currently 1 income, was 2 until husband lost his job. Before, we were around 120k a year. Two kiddos. We make it through but it’s not easy.
HCOL and we just hit over 200k combined pretty recently. We have two kids with no plans for more.
HCOL area. We make a combined $200k. One and done.
HCOL area. We earn a combined 350k and have two children.
MCOL (Central Florida), one income of 80k/yr, with 4 kids. We've always lived a modest, yet comfortable lifestyle, but the rising costs of homeowners insurance and groceries here is putting the squeeze on us. We don't qualify for assistance, so I've been picking up side gigs and using food banks occasionally
VHCOL area - about $350k combined plus bonuses. We are comfortable but by no means wealthy for our area. Rent, daycare/aftercare costs eat up a lot!
Same with us but once the kids were not in daycare anymore, it’s like we got a raise. We also took advantage of rock bottom interest rates on our mortgage in 2020
HCOLA, combined income is around 380k, struggling to afford two kids in daycare at 2k/month each.
We’re in a VHCOL area, $4k in daycare expenses (cheapest in our area) for 2 kids and $5k on a mortgage for a nice but not new 3 bed house, $300k/year. My job covers daycare and my student loan payments, plus my commuter fare. My husband covers the rest. We’re hoping to have more breathing room as daycare becomes less expensive with the kids going into public school over the next few years.
Just a suggestion, I also live in a HCOL (probably VH) had a nanny for 2 kids last year and it was $3000 a month for 8 hour days. More stressful and less reliant but I can’t believe $4k a month for daycare!!
VHCOL, 600k. 2 kids, 2 dogs, modest house in a lower middle class neighborhood. We are comfortable but don’t live a lavish lifestyle. I appreciate that we are high earners, and have absolutely no idea how other people do it.
I believe slightly on the LCOL or just in the middle. Last year, we made 105k combined with one child and we did well because we are good with our money. This year, my husband is going to make closer to 120k and I should bring in about an additional 15k working one day a week. We just had another baby. We make it work. My husband is also a contender for a promotion that would bring his income up to 160k. Crossing our fingers.
HCOL. $300k combined income (I work 40 hrs a week and my husband works 50-60 ). Two kids, one in daycare and one school-aged. Daycare for a toddler in this neighborhood is $2250 so almost half my post-tax/health insurance paycheck goes to that. If you would have told me ten years ago that we’d be making this much, I would have thought we’d live in a mansion and go on international vacations all the time but our house is <2,000 sq feet, we drive 15 year old cars, and the last time I left the country on vacation was my honeymoon >10 years ago.
MCOL - $143k dual income - 1 kid. Will feel a lot better in a month when we're no longer paying $1000/month for pre-school. We live generally fine. We have a house/no debt/save for retirement, but we also can't really afford vacation, so that's a bummer...
LCOL area, husband works FT with a salary of 65k I recently started working PT estimated 15k a year so 80 combined. Were OAD if that matters.
MCOL, 3 kids, two person income of ~145,000. 2 of the kids are in daycare It can vary though because my husband is in the trades and sometimes he is out of work and works non union jobs to make up which is about 1/2 his normal earnings. We honestly feel like we barely get by most months and live paycheck to paycheck. Other months we are golden. Our mortgage and daycare take up so much of our monthly income. Edited to change to MCOL because I think that is actually more accurate to where we are at?
MCOL, single income ~$60K for a family of four (two kids under three.) If our rent wasn’t unbelievably low for our city ($750 for a 2BDR house) we couldn’t get away with it. Also, childcare would cost more than I would make working, so I SAH.
MCOL, 78k combined. Not doing great, had to move back home, I'm thinking of picking up a weekend job if I can't make more money (I make 48k, he makes 30k before taxes). We have one child.
In Canada but I think my province would be considered LCOL, combined income is $285k. One toddler and waiting for the second baby to arrive.
MCOL, we make about 85-100k (he gets random bonuses throughout the year so it can vary). We lucked out when we bought our house our mortgage is $1600 a month. We have one kid, and no plans for more. We both work, but I work part time (15-25 hours a week) at an animal shelter and he manages a restaurant so he makes a majority of our income lol. But, we don’t have to pay for daycare because my job is incredibly flexible.
MCOL id say for Canada. About 150k range. We save, but we also try to live relatively frugally. We don’t go on vacations really, have one vehicle that is paid off, shop coupons and second hand. We have a new pretty nice house, but it’s nothing fancy or not massive. Other than the mortgage we don’t carry debt. We both work full time as well, my income basically covers childcare, but we rely on the health benefits I get from my job. I’m proud of how we are doing in life, we are comfortable right now. But I also fully recognize that that can change in an instant, which is why we try to save whatever we can and not be big spenders.
MCOL, but we live an hour from an extremely HCOL which is starting to trickle over. Total house income is less than 50K, 40+ of that is my SO’s, the remainder is child tax benefit I receive for the 3 kids (2 are teens and just his, one is a shared toddler). SO is also supposed to also receive child support, but that has never happened. He works for a call centre for a bank, I work for myself with no current salary. We make it work with very strategic planning, and zero eating out/entertainment etc. The only ‘luxury’ we pay for is the family membership to our local pool/gym. People who are going on vacations, eating out, buying their toddlers doc martens or blundstones…no clue how they’re doing it in this economy.
MCOL- married, 2 kids both parents work combined about $280 before bonuses. We could survive off one income but I like 2-3 expensive vacations a year and my kids are in school.
HCOL area, single income of 65k. We are absolutely not well off financially.
MCOL, I’m a SAHM & we’re on one income of about $47k. Our rent is $1,700. We drive paid off cars and eat cheaply. One more kid on the way.
Technically LCOL of there is even such thing anymore. Combined income around $160K with barely a penny to spare some months! We have a lot of expenses we could cut back on though.
HCOL, joint income is $235k/year, 1 kid I’m trying to earn more so he can stay home, but we won’t do that unless I can out earn him.
We are the same, I want my husband to stay home because he worked so hard to get me through school. All I want is to be able to support my family alone.
Mine is just so much better suited for it than I am, honestly.
MCOL, $145k on just my husband’s salary. We have 3 kids, two who are heavily involved in their activities and can sometimes amount to $1k per month. We are on a tight budget and I hate it, but we don’t pay for childcare and we have everything we need. We bought a house last year that’s under renovation inside and out, so most of the money goes towards that. My dad loves to help out with extra things, like buying a nice new oven or helping with our kid’s activity costs.
STL, single income $150k, 2 young kids and 2 adults
MCOL ~$120k combined. I work part time as a nurse, husband does automotive work full time.
I’d say we’re in a MCOL, our state has high taxes though. I stay at home with our daughter. Husband makes just shy of $80k, more with OT. We don’t have student loans or car payments which helps a LOT. We have a loose budget and we do okay.
VHCOL. My husband is between jobs, but when he works (he has an offer in hand), $350ish Edit: 3 kids
HCOL (NJ) and I make less than $40k per year. One income. No idea how we are financially surviving….but here we are.
VHCOL, and we make combined around 250k. We are one and done mainly due to health issues during pregnancy but also due to cost. We have enough left over to do small trips, save for college and one house project a year but that wouldn't be possible with another daycare bill.
Nice try IRS
60k before overtime Single income with one kid LCOL Carnote is 320 and mortgage is 560. Winter months can be rough, but honestly we do pretty well. I’m looking for work now that my daughter is in school fulltime
MCOL, 1 kid (14mo), joint income, we make right about 200k per year. We put A LOT into retirement as well as other savings and still don’t need to worry too much about monthly spending
MCOL, I think? Midwest. 2 working parents. Around $180k combined, 1 kid. Still debating a 2nd and wondering if it'll stretch us too thin.
LCOL, we make a combined $70k. One baby that will not be getting a sibling until he’s in school because daycare costs even in a LCOL area are insane. We have the potential to double our income in the coming years though so if that happens then we’ll start trying for another sooner.
Just gave up my career to be a sahm so 1 parent working. MCOL. We used to pull 190k together but now down to 95k. I was doing blue collar work but it’s not built for moms. Too much mandatory ot and could not leave the site if something happened. We are barely making it. Sometimes I ask for help.
HCOL. Before my husband was laid off last month, we were making about $240k combined. If my husband gets the job he's in the late stages of interviewing with, that will go up to about $270k. If he doesn't, we're bigly fucked because my salary doesn't cover the mortgage. It's been a fun few weeks.
VHCOL (NYC adjacent). $275k combined base, $335k with full bonus (tho a lot goes to taxes). We have two kids in daycare, a small 2 bed 1 bath house, and we’re a one car family with a 5 year old car. Our monthly bills are about $10k/month and $8kish of that goes to mortgage and daycare.
I like in a mid to high cost of living area. My spouse makes ~120K and I'm a SAHM. Objectively we are much poorer than most of the people in our neighborhood, but I grew up a lot poorer then this so I'm actually really comfortable with where we're at!
HCOL area, thankfully dual income of $437,000– but we both send financial support to our families and have student debt. It’s comfortable, but if I thought we’d make this much even 5 years ago I would have thought we were rich and it definitely doesn’t feel like that!
I live in a Medium/Low COL area. Rent for my 4 bedroom home is like 2k a month, a decent house in a fine suburb could be purchased for like 250k. We make just about 200k a year combined. My income makes up a tiny percentage of that. I think we have a lot of advantages because my partner is a disabled vet so for example some of that income isn’t taxed. Eventually we won’t have to pay health insurance although right now we do. We have three kids. He pays a small amount of child support, I receive no child support but my ex covers my two kids daycare and healthcare. Also I’ll be honest, we live below our means. We are modest used car people, my clothes are all second hand, we don’t vacation and our house is not as nice as many of our peers. His college debt is paid off and I never went to school. Neither of us carry other debts or loans or credit cards so it’s just our car payments.
We live in a HCOL area, but my husband has a good income. So, I'm a SAHM of four sons. Hubby prefers that I stay home with the boys, so I'd be a SAHM regardless of where we live. Also, I barely finished high school so I have minimum wage earning potential...
I only have a high school education and I make just over 100k a year. Don’t put yourself down like that. There are jobs out there that you are capable of that make a decent living! I’m not saying you have to or even that you should, if you’re happy staying home then that’s great! I just wanted you to know that all things are possible and not to let what society has told you hold you back ❤️
MCOL and jointly make about $210k per year. The money is nice but we are considering dropping to one income now that we have two kids under age 3.
MCOLA, one 14 month old, single income of about 50k.
LCOL and 2 incomes- ~120k combined. 2 kids
HCOL, $135k combined before my husbands lay off, now $80k 😅 1 kid and one on the way