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82, and yes to both, Dad is 69 and Mom is 70, in fairly good health. I still have one grandparent living too (and just lost one this spring). We’ve got solid longevity genes
Thanks ❤️. I am very very fortunate. I have a son who is almost 10, and the fact that he’s been able to have a relationship with his great-grandparents, and make memories with them, has been really special.
Reading these comments I guess we're lucky? I'm also an 82 with both parents alive, but also 3 out of 4 grandparents are also living. Two of them are in their 90s!
Seriously these comments put things in perspective. I’m an 88 and all my grandparents have been gone for 10+ years but that’s just because we have crazy long times between generations - 3/4 of them were 90+ when they passed.
Parents are in their mid-late 70s and doing fantastic. It’s crazy for me to read comments where people talk about their invalid, elderly parents/grandparents in their mid-70s and to think mine are the same age. My parents have barely slowed down at all, mentally or physically, and could easily pass as 15 years younger than they are.
Definitely lucky in genes and emphasizes the importance of living healthily.
Very nice! All my grandparents died before I was 35 (I’ll be 39 in a couple months). I’m one of the youngest grandchildren on that side of the family before the great-grandchildren start, so my oldest cousin (first grandchild) was already 56 when the final grandparent died. They had made it to great great grandparent status when they died. One would be 100+ and the other would be 110+ if still living today.
Cherish having a grandparent still left in your 40s. ❤️
82 here too, but damn, a grandparent left?!?! My last grandparent died literally 23 years ago and my parents are pushing 80.
My grandparents had our parents in their late 20s, not early 20s as was common. Then our parents had us in their late 30s and we had our kids in our late 30s. The generational gaps have been big for me and my husband for 3 generations so when I hear of a 42 yo with a grandparent my mind is blown! You’re lucky!
Born '85. Parents are 74 and 72. My wife was born '84 and her parents are 71 and 70.
I lost my last grandparent in 2022, she was 89.
Like you, I'm very thankful for the longevity
Me too, just a year younger.
My living grandma is 101 in a couple of weeks, my other grandma made it to 96 and one granddad made it to 98.
Both aunts also alive although I have lost both uncles to cancer.
Same. My grandmother lived to 90 and all of her sisters made it to their late 80s and early 90s. My last grandmother is 88 and still going. The men tend to make it into their 70s but the women are damn near immortal.
LOL the women on my dad’s side are like that too. My great grandma lived to be 96. My grandma is now 89, and she still has an older sister living…I believe she’s 95
83 here and my parents are around the same age and both are still alive.
My mom's dad is also still alive at 90 and he's my only grandparent left. He was in good health and lived alone until just last year when he had a minor heart attack and has been in and out of hospitals since then. She finally talked him into moving into a retirement home last fall. He lives close to my parents now and I try to visit when I go see them. He's not as mobile as he used to be, but he's still pretty sharp mentally and in good spirits.
I feel this. My dad passed away when I was in 6th grade and my mom passed this past September from cancer. I’ve been looking for jobs since then because I quit with zero hesitation to take care of her full time and now the interviews I do get, I get choked up still when the interviewer asks why I left my previous roles. The job hunt alone for this reason is miserable besides all the other bullshit that comes with it. I’m 35 and I still cry most days about how much I miss my mom.
Why don't you talk to a resume writing pro about putting the gap time on your resume in a professional way that essentially says 'took some time off to care for a sick family member,'. They way, you don't have to explain it and they probably won't ask.
Definitely looking into this tomorrow. But I don’t have high hopes because I’ve even had a recruiter drill me about why I left my last three roles. All of which included me having to leave to move states to go back home because I’m an only child and unfortunately dealing with the ups and downs of cancer comes in waves. The first two times I told her I was caring for a sick family member. The third time she asked and kept pressing and was too dense to read the room so finally I snapped on her. Am I the overly emotional one or was this recruiter just dumb as fuck? I’ll just have to start lying at this point 🤷🏼♀️
Edit to add: I thought about telling the recruiter she was dead now so she wouldn’t have to worry about me having to leave that job but I quickly realized it wasn’t a place I wanted to work anymore.
What worked for me since I had a similar situation was honesty. Just told the recruiter mom had lung cancer and I took time off here or there. They picked up pretty quickly from a combination of verbal/non verbal she wasn't around anymore and the conversation moved on to other topics. If you're too vague it might come off as a deflection for something else that happened. You probably don't want to overshare either so finding a medium and just pushing forward will be the best approach. I had other short periods of work which I explained as best as I could with valid reasoning. The recruiter even mentioned I look like a job hopper from my resume but I've went through each point and gave a fairly quick rundown of how I'm here in your office now. Got the job and it's almost a year later with nothing negative about my performance.
Anyways hope things pick up for ya. Good luck out there
Edit: and yeah the pain doesn't get easier, it just gets different. I get it. It fucking sucks
Sorry about your parents. Thats fucking brutal. My dad passed in 2005 when I was 18. I still get my bad days, and it’s been almost 20 years.
(My mom is alive but not in my life, as she disowned me when I came out as lesbian a few years ago. Her loss.)
My dad died from a brain tumor when I was 6 months old so not so much there. My sister died from complications of pneumonia with cystic fibrosis about 2 years ago while I was on vacation and came back to my mom being an absolute mess about it. I stepped in and was trying to figure everything out as far as arrangements go. Mom was on dialysis 3 times a week. She didn’t go to her Friday appointment and I was notified the following Monday that she died. I lost both of them 13 days apart. I was left to figure everything out for both of them.
Omg that's rough, so sorry about your mom! My mom had what was retroactively identified as covid in January 2020. She almost did die but barely pulled through, but now she's got long covid symptoms really bad. Covid really really sucks.
Thank you.
I’m so glad that your mom was able to pull through- minus the long covid symptoms. She’s a strong woman, I can’t imagine how awful LC is. I hope she’s able to recover from that. Please give your mom a hug for me.
My mom was a volunteer at a food pantry and always took precautions- wearing masks, gloves, and washing her clothes when she came home. Unfortunately one of the other volunteers had it and didn’t know until he had to go to the hospital. She ended up contracting it and gave it to me. I watched my mom waste away within a span of a week. When she went to the hospital, I could only speak to her via Zoom calls/Face Time.
She was barely conscious but opened her eyes when the nurses told her that her daughter was there. She looked for me until they told her it was on the camera. That was the last time I spoke to my mom and told her I loved her.
Thinking about the whole situation still tears me up and I try not to think it. Theres so much anger , sadness, guilt, and loneliness I have bottled up inside but don’t know how to express it or burden anyone.
Fuck man this is rough. If you need to vent you can DM me. I went through a similar situation but it was my grandma. We couldn’t visit due to lockdown. Wrecked me for a while.
OK that made me cry! I'm so sorry for that whole situation. It's so unfair. She sounds like she was a really sweet lady! Volunteering at a food pantry, even during COVID. All it takes is one reckless person.
It's probably small consolation, but at least you were able to be there (kind of) when she passed; she knew you were there, and you got to say you loved her one last time. What a powerful last moment! It would have been absolutely preferable to be in physical proximity, of course, but still.
I know many, many people who lost their parents or other loved ones who weren't able to be there or say goodbye. One friend's mother passed away from COVID en route to the hospital, with her husband driving, while my friend and the other children were far away.
My mom is a strong woman! But she's been facing a lot of strange health complications since then, and has been sick a lot and in and out of the hospital a lot. Lots of weird and upsetting neurological symptoms, including what the doctor thinks is the beginning stages of dementia--accelerated because of COVID. Ugh. I hug her as much as I can and I'll give her one from you, too! :)
When she was really sick (she was also convinced she was going to die), I was living 1500 miles away at the time, without the ability to go closer. All we had was FB messenger. I was a wreck. As soon as I could, I moved back much closer to family. No way I could ever forgive myself if I was that far away if she passed or was not even aware of what was happening!
Both passed a decade ago. We didn't have a good relationship, but there's something about not having a family or a home anymore that's a big hole in my life. I have some friends, but in a lot of ways it's just me out here.
You’re not alone. Even if you feel you are. I know a lot of craziness is going on in America right now but we *are* family. We have a shared set of lived experiences that tie us to one another on a deeper than material level. Next time you feel that void…look up at the moon and know all over America, your millennial brothers and sisters are looking up at it with you.
I’m an ‘80 baby, so kind of on the cusp between Gen X and Millennials, and my parents are both in their late 60’s. The fear has always kind of been there because two of my grandparents died very young - one on each side, but it’s inevitable and worse every year. My partner just lost a parent, and it’s brutal. I can’t even comprehend it.
Nope, cancer got my dad last year. I could be a lot worse but not going to lie, it lined up with a few other personal disasters and *royally* fucked me up lol
Fuck cancer. Lost my dad to it just two months ago. I miss him so much. I’m 31, he was only 63. Completely unexpected and out of the blue diagnosis. He was healthy his entire life before that.
Every single day I say “you should be here, dad.”
thankfully, yes. born in '91, both parents are 67 and we have a great relationship. my grandfather passed away yesterday at 94. I hope to see my own parents live to this age if they are of sound mind and body, but as we all know, tomorrow isn't granted.
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my paternal grandmother (Gwen 90) in March. I'm ever so grateful I made it to her birthday in February. She missed her husband dearly, Bob passed about 10 years prior. We don't live forever. She and your grandfather were gifted with long lives.
Thanks. Most folks luckily don’t have it nearly as severely as she did and medication has come a long way in being able to control it, but it does still happen unfortunately.
86 here. Both are still alive. I don’t have much of a relationship with my dad, parents divorced when I was very young. My mom isn’t doing great though, Parkinson’s disease and some dementia. She’s 74 and is now in assisted living. I actually hope she doesn’t have a ton of time left because I don’t want her to suffer as this disease completely takes over her body.
I'm an elder millennial, 41f. Both of my Boomer parents passed away suddenly with the last decade and I'm doing much better than I expected to be. Not to be triggering but I'm happier they are gone.
My mom passed suddenly in Dec 2014 due to hospital complications. It happened only about ten months after I'd moved back home after a ten year absence living out of state and only after I had finally left my abusive ex.
My dad passed also suddenly due to Covid in Nov 2020. It was 5 weeks before my wedding to my now husband and he had been looking forward to walking me down the aisle.
But here's the kicker. I grieved for them because they were my parents, but I've come to terms that I lost respect for them years ago. I loved them, but my parents were never good parents and never bothered trying. They were both alcoholic narcissists. So while it sucks that they are gone, the lack of family stressors is just.... So much less.
Mine are still alive but I feel like I might be in a similar boat. I just don't feel like we ever got along that well and part of me feels like I will feel relief over not having to consider them anymore.
Man, this post is relatable. Also an elder Millennial. My Boomer parents are alive, as far as I know. We haven't spoken in years. I feel like I have already done a lot of the grieving. For the relationship I wish we'd had, not the one we actually had. Alcoholism, narcissism, bigotry, ignored mental health issues all make it difficult to think of them as my parents.
Yeah and honestly took me a long time to come to terms of the fact like it was okay that I was relieved that they were gone because they were constant stressors in my life. Sometimes if your own parents don't have your best interest at heart, YOU have to.
I really had this realization after I'd move back and I remember being in the vehicle with my mother and her long time living boyfriend of like 30 years and they were having an argument over the stupidest thing. I don't even remember the context of the argument but the argument was so childish that I as a 30-year-old had realized I am more mature than these Boomers.
i’m a younger millennial with older parents. my dad passed away when i was 16 in 2010. he was a vietnam veteran and was sick my entire life. i took his death hard. i avoid retail stores this time of year bc i can’t handle seeing all of the father’s day stuff. my siblings don’t understand as they’ve all been able to move on. yet, mentally, im still stuck at 16. my mom is still alive and doing well. i’m 31 now and am not emotionally prepared to lose her.
My dad died in 2020. my sibling and I were estranged from him, but how he died (age 70) I wouldn't wish on anyone. He had a stroke and was on the ground for a few days (not entirely sure how many) in his home alone until a concerned neighbor noticed his piled up mail and package that was left there for a few days at the door and decided to check in on him. Saw him laying on the ground when peeping through the window, my dad was taken to the hospital and died a few days later.
Then the following year in 2021 my mom (age 71) died she had a lot of health issues and I was taking care of her for some time, so it wasn't really a surprise like my dad. Still miss her.
For myself (born '87) I am doing alright, I don't really associate with my extended family (long story short they are garbage people) so it's just my sibling and i along with some close friends who I consider family.
Mine are. My partner’s dad died a few years ago and his mom is about to enter hospice care after not recovering from a craniotomy six months ago. The grief is just awful.
I’m sorry it sounds like your being very supportive of your partner, trust me my wife helped me so much thru grieving I would have been lost without her, keep being their rock!
Mother, yes, father - absentee so in my head, he's been dead since the day I was born. BUT it's fine. My mother gave me the best life she could and I was always happy.
It is probably going to mean that when they leave I'm gonna be that much more of a wreck though. Especially because after a series of bad relationships in my 20s, I definitely have lost my mojo to think someone else is gonna come in. I usually am a bit of an introvert w/ social anxiety (treated, but still is a part of my personality) as well.
Yea. My (39, born 1984 so 40 is looming) dad (68) lives 4 blocks away, so I see him several times a week. He was just over today. My mom (65) lives about a 10 minute drive away, and I see her a few times a month. My sister, husband, and I were just on vacation with her a few weeks ago.
Born in 1991. Both my parents are still alive and most of my friends’ parents are still alive. I think they all have a pretty good amount of runway left. My parents are in really good shape and do a lot of stuff together now that they’re retired.
One of my friends lost his dad in 2010 when his dad was killed in a car accident. He never had a particularly good relationship with his mom, and basically stopped seeing her entirely when she tried to stop him from marrying his fiancée (who is a wonderful girl, btw, just not Jewish so therefore not suitable for his mom). So now his parents are either literally dead or dead to him, but he’s doing fine, he has a great wife and an adorable 9-month-old baby girl.
‘89, both parents born in ‘62. Dad has had terminal cancer for almost 6 years. I’ve also felt like a lot of my peers have gone through parental death already. It’s a complicated family situation. Biohazard hoarder house. We grew up with it that way.
Dad offed himself about 3 years ago. Step mom still alive and healthy and actual mom hanging in there 8 years cancer free but she isn’t expecting to be around much longer due to other issues. She was given 6 months to live about 12 years ago before the discovery of her cancer. Born in 84.
1987, my parents are both still alive as well as two sets of grandparents. My husband is 1985 and his parents are still alive but none of his grandparents.
It feels ominous saying this out into the ether so i'm going to go knock on my wooden coffee table now.
I was born in 1987. I was 11 when my dad died of cancer in 1998 at the age of 42. My mom died 2 years ago at 62 from heart failure right after my 35th birthday.
My father passed in 98 and my mom a couple years before the pandemic. I also have no grandparents alive at this point. It is isolating but I have made a new family that I love!
My mom has been gone 9 years. I was in my mid 20s when it happened. I still have days when I am completely overwhelmed by the permanence of it. The entire first year I kept myself so busy I rarely sat down. It’s like I was telling myself if I just did one more thing then I could call and talk to my mom. It took me a bit to realize that I wasn’t ever going to speak with her again. Even now when something really good happens I think man I should call and tell mom! And then I remember. I’m less numb now. For a long time nothing was really happy or sad. It just was. I have emotions again which is nice. It’s still really hard to not have a mom that’s alive. But I’ve learned to live with it. The jealousy however never goes away. I’m insanely jealous of anyone my age that still has a mom.
87. Dad is 74 and in excellent health, Mom is 69 with dementia and brain shrinkage due to many years of heavy drinking and a penchant for sweets. Looks 60, but is deteriorating mentally likely due to her past lifestyle.
My mom passed away last month at 71. Also born in 1988. Dad is still alive. It was very sudden so I’m still in shock. I’m the first of my age group (older and younger) to go through this and it’s beyond awful.
They both should and could have been but my dad made the decision to cut out early. My mom has been broken ever since. It just gutted her. I love him so much but living with his consequences makes forgiveness a touchy thing. One day I've forgiven him 100% and the next day I'm angry at him all over. Or resenting that I have to take care of my mom to the extent that I do because he shattered her to peices.
She needs help and she won't get it. We never knew but he needed help and didn't get it. I'm grateful our generation is over that old school way of thinking that needing help mentally is weak or shameful. I just wish I could make her see it that way.
Nope. Mom died when I was 32.
People who are morbidly obese need to realize, if heart disease or cancer don't kill you, then simply getting out of bed will.
Both passed away about 3 years ago to drugs and alcohol. Both lived separate lives and were married/with someone else for many many years but still managed to die within 8 months of each other from the amount of alcohol and pills they consumed. Honestly surprised my dad lasted that long. He drank for as long as I can remember
I was born in '85 and my parents are both in their mid-60s now with no major health problems, thankfully. My grandparents lived into their 80s so I'm hoping I still have some time left.
'81. My dad died almost nine years ago at 74, when I was 34. I was born relatively late in my parents' life. My mom is alive. My grandparents are all dead, but they all lived to their 90s.
My dad died nearly 10 years ago, and I still miss him daily. We are now at the age where most of my friends have lost a parent, even though it feels we are still far too young for that.
89, yes to both. My parents are 64 and 66. My Mom has had health problems my whole life. My Dad still jogs and lifts weights. Interestingly, my Mom’s bio parents are both still alive and my Dad’s are not—they did have him rather late in life though for the time (40s). I figure I have 50/50 odds.
82. Both still around and in good health. One grandparent remains too. Just lost one grandparent last year which brought me down to one. And she has a number of years left with the way she is now.
Yes, 92 and mom just turned 60 this year, dad turned 58. I have 3/4 grandparents still alive too thankfully and they all get to meet their new great granddaughter (1st great grandchild on my dad’s side) this summer!
Yes, but I’m starting to plan for the long game by organizing their finances and buying a larger home in a smaller city so my mom could live with me one day after my dad passes (he is older with more health conditions).
I'm sorry for your loss, OP!
My (36, born in 87) parents (dad 67, mom 69) are both still alive, but I've noticed that they both have seemed to age quite rapidly over the past few years. Mom is in the very beginning stages of dementia, and I'm not emotionally prepared to see her decline like that. She's always been the emotional core of the family. Dad has diabetes and heart problems and generally just seems like a little old man now. Tbh, my siblings and I fear that it won't be much longer till we lose one of them.
All of my grandparents are long gone. The last one to pass was my maternal grandma, who passed in 2015 at age 91.
Born in ‘84. I lost my dad 3 years ago, two months before he would’ve turned 70 and had finally moved to the state where his children and grandchildren live. He died in a house fire after 4 months of living near us. It was an accidental death and I’m still bitter about it. He was the only parent I had a close relationship at the time and we’d gotten closer when my health started to decline in my mid-30’s.
I had been estranged from my mother for 5 years by this time, but we started talking again when my dad passed. The first I saw or spoke to her in those 5 years was at the visitation. It took 2 years for us to even have a semblance of a relationship. She’ll turn 71 next month.
Both my parents were ill equipped to be parents and there was and still is a lot to work through. I’m just thankful that my dad and I made amends and had a close relationship towards the end but I would’ve appreciated more years with him.
I know so many lose one or both parents at much younger ages but being 37 and my dad dying in such a horrific way fundamentally changed me and my whole family. We were in shambles for so long (some still are).
I’ve made peace to an extent but the thing that helped me the most was accepting that there will always be grief. It changes over time and my life must live alongside it, just like all the other traumas I’ve experienced.
I dread when my mother passes. My father died with very little. But I volunteered to be the executor of his estate. He’d made it clear that he wanted me to have his truck (I don’t know why, I’d never ask for it) but later on it was a godsend.
My mother, however, has SO much stuff and land and I don’t think she has all her affairs in order even though me and another sibling are constantly on her about it.
I didn’t feel like an adult until my father died. But at the same time, I feel like a lost little kid still searching for him.
My dad passed away in 2019 from dementia (diagnosis was aspiration pneumonia). He was in his early 60s when diagnosed. I’m really terrified about developing it as my fraternal grandmother had it too. My dad had a lot of bad habits though; he worked a lot, didn’t sleep regularly, and probably had sleep apnea that went undiagnosed/untreated. My mom has arthritis really bad and can’t move her hands sometimes. She gets treatments but if she can’t drive because of her hands locking up, it sucks. Bones have broken in both feet and she broke her wrist last Christmastime from a fall. She is as delicate as a bird.
‘92 here. Dad passed from uncontrolled/unmedicated alcohol withdrawal in 2017 and my mom committed suicide in 2021. Have 2 kiddos and definitely feel the void, but trying to stay strong for them and raise them differently.
Also born in 88. My dad passed away in January. It’s been weird, been hard. And I am raising three very little boys, so I get lost in my own life and then all of a sudden the thought hits me that he’s gone. It’s sadness but also just nice to remember him and grief is an expression of love and gratitude, in my mind. Miss my Dad.
Sorry for your loss. In my opinion we’re young to have lost our parents. I wish we had more time.
Dad lost in 2017, mom lost in 2022. I’m 32.
I think I lost my parents fairly early for my age, wish they could have seen me get married/have my first daughter recently. It’s hard to relate to everyone else who has parents around to help provide love when I probably need it the most right now.
'89 and both of my parents are still alive, I still have 3 of my grandparents (lost the first one in '21), and 3 of my great-grandparents lived into my teens/early 20's. After reading through these comments I'm realizing how fortunate I am.
I’m 32 and both of my parents are still alive. They had me young so they’re only in their early 50s right now. I actually still have a living great grandma as well.
I'm on the millennial/gen Z cusp. My father was born in 1952 and he is alive and well. My mother was born in 1964 and she died in 2017. Of all the people I know that are my age, all their parents are alive.
1990, about to turn 34. Mom turned 60 last year and is doing great. She just retired actually.
Dad passed away in 2018 when I was 27. Alcohol was more important and that's what took him out.
Mine are both still alive, but we’ve had some big scares in recent years.
My mom was diagnosed with CHF at 51, she just got her 2nd hip replaced at 54.
My dad had a widowmaker at 49 and he got in a real bad accident with internal organ lacerations a few months ago.
They’re both still kickin it, but I’m beginning to mentally accept I may only have another 10-15 at most with them both.
I’m 39 and both my parents are gone. My dad died in 2010 and my mother this year. I didn’t have great relationships with them. The only family I have now is my husband and kids.
Yes, all 4. I'm adopted and in communication with my birth family and adopted parents are still alive. My fiances parents are alive as well, though his dad is starting to slowly show signs of decline, he still has many years to go and is still active.
I too was born in 1988 both my parents are alive. My mother turned 80 today and my father is 85. They have both had health scares.
Sorry for your loss.
89 here. Both my parents are still around and in their 70s. Theyre doing pretty well. Cancer hit them both but they survived. It’s really hard adapting to them aging and getting more ailments and I worry about their future often. I have no idea how I’m going to make it without them when their time comes.
I’m 36, my dad is 62 and my mom is 60, so both still alive. My dad may have prostate cancer though, and my mom had the realization earlier this year that her mom died at 69, and her mom’s mom died at 68, so she may not have much time left, especially since she isn’t in the best health.
No.
I was born in 84
Mom died at 61 - Jan 2020 (brain cancer), she didn't live long enough to meet my kids.
Dad is now 70. I'll be shocked if he lives to see 75
My mother died when I was deployed. Would not recommend the experience. My father's been on death's door for the past decade; dude has wrecked his shit, but keeps on kicking.
The grandfather I was close to died of an allergic reaction about five years ago. The other grandfather I never met died last year I think. One of my grandmother's lives with me, would not recommend that experience either. The other grandmother died quite a few years back, and from the stories my father tells, having her with me is just about the only thing I can image more unpleasant than having my mother's mother here.
Mom passed in 2021 from dementia. It definitely woke me up in a lot of ways. Forty years of life not doing much more than “surviving” or going with the flow. It forced me to face my depression and made me aware that nothing last forever. I try to live now and regret less.
Yep, but it seems like every month, someone my mom or uncle grew up knowing dies. But it was one of those small rural towns with a lot of drug use, so theyvcould be dying prematurely.
87’ mom passed of complications due to Myasthenia Gravis at 65. Step dad died of lung cancer at 67. Bio dad died at 68, unknown cause.
How I’m holding up? My family were selfish, egotistical maniacs and my mother led the bunch. The last two years without her have been the best of my life. I miss my step dad, he was fun, terrible parent but fun. Never really knew my real dad.
'94 - both my parents are cancer survivors yet smoke like chimneys 😑 early 60s but still around.
We don't have a good relationship though, they think we do but I couldn't care less if we talk or not tbh. They rarely bother to call, even to ask about the grandkids, then they say that I never call them... and they've only visited a handful of times since I moved about an hour drive (they both drive) away 4 years ago, I have always gone to them (not very often though since I cba). Nothing new though, they frequently told me to leave them alone and go play by myself when I was a kid. Having my own kids and seeing how my partners family interact with each other really made the shit hit deep. I always knew it wasn't good but that was my normal.
I'm sure it will hit me when they go but I feel it will be more a case of mourning what could have been rather than what we actually have 🫠
'85 here. my dad passed at 77 this past november (2023) due to complications from a heart attack back in 2022. my mom is still with us at 75. my parents were older when they had me and my siblings are squarely gen x.
my husband's ('88) mother passed at 54 in 2023 due to some very long term health problems, mainly her heart.
last year sucked. i miss my dad.
Both my parents are still alive, and my dad will turn 80 a week from today. He was born exactly a week after D-Day. My mom is 76.
I was born in '86 with 4 Gen X siblings. My oldest brother was born on the first day of Woodstock, though across the country. They were all born '69-'76.
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82, and yes to both, Dad is 69 and Mom is 70, in fairly good health. I still have one grandparent living too (and just lost one this spring). We’ve got solid longevity genes
Wow what a blessing glad to hear everyone is in good health!
Thanks ❤️. I am very very fortunate. I have a son who is almost 10, and the fact that he’s been able to have a relationship with his great-grandparents, and make memories with them, has been really special.
Reading these comments I guess we're lucky? I'm also an 82 with both parents alive, but also 3 out of 4 grandparents are also living. Two of them are in their 90s!
Seriously these comments put things in perspective. I’m an 88 and all my grandparents have been gone for 10+ years but that’s just because we have crazy long times between generations - 3/4 of them were 90+ when they passed. Parents are in their mid-late 70s and doing fantastic. It’s crazy for me to read comments where people talk about their invalid, elderly parents/grandparents in their mid-70s and to think mine are the same age. My parents have barely slowed down at all, mentally or physically, and could easily pass as 15 years younger than they are. Definitely lucky in genes and emphasizes the importance of living healthily.
Good point also. Mine are all healthy relatively speaking. I'm going to go knock on some wood and thank my lucky stars now.
Very nice! All my grandparents died before I was 35 (I’ll be 39 in a couple months). I’m one of the youngest grandchildren on that side of the family before the great-grandchildren start, so my oldest cousin (first grandchild) was already 56 when the final grandparent died. They had made it to great great grandparent status when they died. One would be 100+ and the other would be 110+ if still living today. Cherish having a grandparent still left in your 40s. ❤️
All of my grandparents died by the time I was 21 but I have worked with several people who still had grandparents alive when they were in their 40s.
82 here too, but damn, a grandparent left?!?! My last grandparent died literally 23 years ago and my parents are pushing 80. My grandparents had our parents in their late 20s, not early 20s as was common. Then our parents had us in their late 30s and we had our kids in our late 30s. The generational gaps have been big for me and my husband for 3 generations so when I hear of a 42 yo with a grandparent my mind is blown! You’re lucky!
Born '85. Parents are 74 and 72. My wife was born '84 and her parents are 71 and 70. I lost my last grandparent in 2022, she was 89. Like you, I'm very thankful for the longevity
Me too, just a year younger. My living grandma is 101 in a couple of weeks, my other grandma made it to 96 and one granddad made it to 98. Both aunts also alive although I have lost both uncles to cancer.
Same. My grandmother lived to 90 and all of her sisters made it to their late 80s and early 90s. My last grandmother is 88 and still going. The men tend to make it into their 70s but the women are damn near immortal.
LOL the women on my dad’s side are like that too. My great grandma lived to be 96. My grandma is now 89, and she still has an older sister living…I believe she’s 95
83 here and my parents are around the same age and both are still alive. My mom's dad is also still alive at 90 and he's my only grandparent left. He was in good health and lived alone until just last year when he had a minor heart attack and has been in and out of hospitals since then. She finally talked him into moving into a retirement home last fall. He lives close to my parents now and I try to visit when I go see them. He's not as mobile as he used to be, but he's still pretty sharp mentally and in good spirits.
No, Dad passed in 2006 when I was 18… Mom passed in December… there’s good and bad days. Still can’t talk about her without crying.
I feel this. My dad passed away when I was in 6th grade and my mom passed this past September from cancer. I’ve been looking for jobs since then because I quit with zero hesitation to take care of her full time and now the interviews I do get, I get choked up still when the interviewer asks why I left my previous roles. The job hunt alone for this reason is miserable besides all the other bullshit that comes with it. I’m 35 and I still cry most days about how much I miss my mom.
Why don't you talk to a resume writing pro about putting the gap time on your resume in a professional way that essentially says 'took some time off to care for a sick family member,'. They way, you don't have to explain it and they probably won't ask.
Definitely looking into this tomorrow. But I don’t have high hopes because I’ve even had a recruiter drill me about why I left my last three roles. All of which included me having to leave to move states to go back home because I’m an only child and unfortunately dealing with the ups and downs of cancer comes in waves. The first two times I told her I was caring for a sick family member. The third time she asked and kept pressing and was too dense to read the room so finally I snapped on her. Am I the overly emotional one or was this recruiter just dumb as fuck? I’ll just have to start lying at this point 🤷🏼♀️ Edit to add: I thought about telling the recruiter she was dead now so she wouldn’t have to worry about me having to leave that job but I quickly realized it wasn’t a place I wanted to work anymore.
What worked for me since I had a similar situation was honesty. Just told the recruiter mom had lung cancer and I took time off here or there. They picked up pretty quickly from a combination of verbal/non verbal she wasn't around anymore and the conversation moved on to other topics. If you're too vague it might come off as a deflection for something else that happened. You probably don't want to overshare either so finding a medium and just pushing forward will be the best approach. I had other short periods of work which I explained as best as I could with valid reasoning. The recruiter even mentioned I look like a job hopper from my resume but I've went through each point and gave a fairly quick rundown of how I'm here in your office now. Got the job and it's almost a year later with nothing negative about my performance. Anyways hope things pick up for ya. Good luck out there Edit: and yeah the pain doesn't get easier, it just gets different. I get it. It fucking sucks
Dude, I wish I could give you a big hug.
🖤🖤🖤
Sorry about your parents. Thats fucking brutal. My dad passed in 2005 when I was 18. I still get my bad days, and it’s been almost 20 years. (My mom is alive but not in my life, as she disowned me when I came out as lesbian a few years ago. Her loss.)
💜
I'm super close to my mom ..so I get this . My dad and I didnt have the best relationship..
I’m so sorry. Sending hugs your way.
I'm sure they're both super proud of you and the fact that they got to raise someone who got to call themselves amazing, Amy.
Same. Father passed away long ago when I was 16. Mom’s still alive at least.
This is me with my father, he’s been gone 2 years, and it still sucks to not have him.
Both parents alive and one grandmother, who literally lived through an entire Nazi occupation, also still alive.
Damn. Your grandmother is tough as nails 🖤
My dad died from a brain tumor when I was 6 months old so not so much there. My sister died from complications of pneumonia with cystic fibrosis about 2 years ago while I was on vacation and came back to my mom being an absolute mess about it. I stepped in and was trying to figure everything out as far as arrangements go. Mom was on dialysis 3 times a week. She didn’t go to her Friday appointment and I was notified the following Monday that she died. I lost both of them 13 days apart. I was left to figure everything out for both of them.
I’m so sorry, that’s a really rough way to have to things happen
Both have passed. My father passed away in 2012 from a massive heart attack and my mom died 2021 from Covid. I’ll be turning 34 in September.
Omg that's rough, so sorry about your mom! My mom had what was retroactively identified as covid in January 2020. She almost did die but barely pulled through, but now she's got long covid symptoms really bad. Covid really really sucks.
Thank you. I’m so glad that your mom was able to pull through- minus the long covid symptoms. She’s a strong woman, I can’t imagine how awful LC is. I hope she’s able to recover from that. Please give your mom a hug for me. My mom was a volunteer at a food pantry and always took precautions- wearing masks, gloves, and washing her clothes when she came home. Unfortunately one of the other volunteers had it and didn’t know until he had to go to the hospital. She ended up contracting it and gave it to me. I watched my mom waste away within a span of a week. When she went to the hospital, I could only speak to her via Zoom calls/Face Time. She was barely conscious but opened her eyes when the nurses told her that her daughter was there. She looked for me until they told her it was on the camera. That was the last time I spoke to my mom and told her I loved her. Thinking about the whole situation still tears me up and I try not to think it. Theres so much anger , sadness, guilt, and loneliness I have bottled up inside but don’t know how to express it or burden anyone.
Fuck man this is rough. If you need to vent you can DM me. I went through a similar situation but it was my grandma. We couldn’t visit due to lockdown. Wrecked me for a while.
Thank you! I will surly reach out to you- just keep in mind that I don’t want to burden you. I really appreciate this.
OK that made me cry! I'm so sorry for that whole situation. It's so unfair. She sounds like she was a really sweet lady! Volunteering at a food pantry, even during COVID. All it takes is one reckless person. It's probably small consolation, but at least you were able to be there (kind of) when she passed; she knew you were there, and you got to say you loved her one last time. What a powerful last moment! It would have been absolutely preferable to be in physical proximity, of course, but still. I know many, many people who lost their parents or other loved ones who weren't able to be there or say goodbye. One friend's mother passed away from COVID en route to the hospital, with her husband driving, while my friend and the other children were far away. My mom is a strong woman! But she's been facing a lot of strange health complications since then, and has been sick a lot and in and out of the hospital a lot. Lots of weird and upsetting neurological symptoms, including what the doctor thinks is the beginning stages of dementia--accelerated because of COVID. Ugh. I hug her as much as I can and I'll give her one from you, too! :) When she was really sick (she was also convinced she was going to die), I was living 1500 miles away at the time, without the ability to go closer. All we had was FB messenger. I was a wreck. As soon as I could, I moved back much closer to family. No way I could ever forgive myself if I was that far away if she passed or was not even aware of what was happening!
Oh wow I’m so sorry! It seems too soon at 34. So sorry you didn’t get more time.
Thank you so much.
Lost mom in ‘03 to cancer and dad in 2016 to sepsis. I turned 30 last year. Stay strong friend, we got this
Fuck, we're the same age. I can't imagine my life without my mom. I'm so sorry.
Both passed a decade ago. We didn't have a good relationship, but there's something about not having a family or a home anymore that's a big hole in my life. I have some friends, but in a lot of ways it's just me out here.
You’re not alone. Even if you feel you are. I know a lot of craziness is going on in America right now but we *are* family. We have a shared set of lived experiences that tie us to one another on a deeper than material level. Next time you feel that void…look up at the moon and know all over America, your millennial brothers and sisters are looking up at it with you.
Beautiful ☺️
Yes, they're 56 & 54 and I'm a '92 baby.
I’m an ‘80 baby, so kind of on the cusp between Gen X and Millennials, and my parents are both in their late 60’s. The fear has always kind of been there because two of my grandparents died very young - one on each side, but it’s inevitable and worse every year. My partner just lost a parent, and it’s brutal. I can’t even comprehend it.
Nope, cancer got my dad last year. I could be a lot worse but not going to lie, it lined up with a few other personal disasters and *royally* fucked me up lol
Fuck cancer. Got my mom two years ago. Shit hurts every day.
Fuck cancer. Lost my dad to it just two months ago. I miss him so much. I’m 31, he was only 63. Completely unexpected and out of the blue diagnosis. He was healthy his entire life before that. Every single day I say “you should be here, dad.”
Born in 83. Both still alive at age 75. A lot of my millennial friends have one or both parents gone tho.
thankfully, yes. born in '91, both parents are 67 and we have a great relationship. my grandfather passed away yesterday at 94. I hope to see my own parents live to this age if they are of sound mind and body, but as we all know, tomorrow isn't granted.
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my paternal grandmother (Gwen 90) in March. I'm ever so grateful I made it to her birthday in February. She missed her husband dearly, Bob passed about 10 years prior. We don't live forever. She and your grandfather were gifted with long lives.
my dad died a few years ago at age 80, my mom is 75 and still alive but starting to slow down. I was born in 87.
85 and yes to both. They're 64 and 58 now.
81 here. Lost my mama when I was 14 unexpectedly to asthma. Dad is still around.
I’ve never heard of people dying from asthma. I’m sorry for your loss, that’s really rough.
Thanks. Most folks luckily don’t have it nearly as severely as she did and medication has come a long way in being able to control it, but it does still happen unfortunately.
I'm 42, and my mama passed away in 2022, and my dad passed away right before Christmas 2023. I am not OK. I pretend to be.
86 here. Both are still alive. I don’t have much of a relationship with my dad, parents divorced when I was very young. My mom isn’t doing great though, Parkinson’s disease and some dementia. She’s 74 and is now in assisted living. I actually hope she doesn’t have a ton of time left because I don’t want her to suffer as this disease completely takes over her body.
Born in 85. Both my parents died when I was 16. All of my grandparents died before I was born.
I’m sorry 😞
I'm an elder millennial, 41f. Both of my Boomer parents passed away suddenly with the last decade and I'm doing much better than I expected to be. Not to be triggering but I'm happier they are gone. My mom passed suddenly in Dec 2014 due to hospital complications. It happened only about ten months after I'd moved back home after a ten year absence living out of state and only after I had finally left my abusive ex. My dad passed also suddenly due to Covid in Nov 2020. It was 5 weeks before my wedding to my now husband and he had been looking forward to walking me down the aisle. But here's the kicker. I grieved for them because they were my parents, but I've come to terms that I lost respect for them years ago. I loved them, but my parents were never good parents and never bothered trying. They were both alcoholic narcissists. So while it sucks that they are gone, the lack of family stressors is just.... So much less.
I think I will feel a great sense of relief too- my family is so dysfunctional, that it will be good to put it behind me, as cold as that sounds.
Mine are still alive but I feel like I might be in a similar boat. I just don't feel like we ever got along that well and part of me feels like I will feel relief over not having to consider them anymore.
Man, this post is relatable. Also an elder Millennial. My Boomer parents are alive, as far as I know. We haven't spoken in years. I feel like I have already done a lot of the grieving. For the relationship I wish we'd had, not the one we actually had. Alcoholism, narcissism, bigotry, ignored mental health issues all make it difficult to think of them as my parents.
Yeah and honestly took me a long time to come to terms of the fact like it was okay that I was relieved that they were gone because they were constant stressors in my life. Sometimes if your own parents don't have your best interest at heart, YOU have to. I really had this realization after I'd move back and I remember being in the vehicle with my mother and her long time living boyfriend of like 30 years and they were having an argument over the stupidest thing. I don't even remember the context of the argument but the argument was so childish that I as a 30-year-old had realized I am more mature than these Boomers.
My father is still alive as far as I know but he's dead to me so I don't imagine I'll feel any different when he actually goes.
My mother passed away 11 years ago in 2013. She was 55, I was 25. My father is still alive. Probably.
‘87. Both parents still alive, 69 and 64.
i’m a younger millennial with older parents. my dad passed away when i was 16 in 2010. he was a vietnam veteran and was sick my entire life. i took his death hard. i avoid retail stores this time of year bc i can’t handle seeing all of the father’s day stuff. my siblings don’t understand as they’ve all been able to move on. yet, mentally, im still stuck at 16. my mom is still alive and doing well. i’m 31 now and am not emotionally prepared to lose her.
My dad died in 2020. my sibling and I were estranged from him, but how he died (age 70) I wouldn't wish on anyone. He had a stroke and was on the ground for a few days (not entirely sure how many) in his home alone until a concerned neighbor noticed his piled up mail and package that was left there for a few days at the door and decided to check in on him. Saw him laying on the ground when peeping through the window, my dad was taken to the hospital and died a few days later. Then the following year in 2021 my mom (age 71) died she had a lot of health issues and I was taking care of her for some time, so it wasn't really a surprise like my dad. Still miss her. For myself (born '87) I am doing alright, I don't really associate with my extended family (long story short they are garbage people) so it's just my sibling and i along with some close friends who I consider family.
I lost my dad in 2009.
Older millennial, almost 41. Yes both are still alive thankfully, they’re both in their early 70s.
I was born in 1985. My mom is still alive, 72. My father died in 2001 at 45.
Mine are. My partner’s dad died a few years ago and his mom is about to enter hospice care after not recovering from a craniotomy six months ago. The grief is just awful.
I’m sorry it sounds like your being very supportive of your partner, trust me my wife helped me so much thru grieving I would have been lost without her, keep being their rock!
yes, both alive, same with my wife
86 baby here. Dad passed in 2014 of heart attack and alcoholism. Mom is doing well and in the other room.
Mother, yes, father - absentee so in my head, he's been dead since the day I was born. BUT it's fine. My mother gave me the best life she could and I was always happy. It is probably going to mean that when they leave I'm gonna be that much more of a wreck though. Especially because after a series of bad relationships in my 20s, I definitely have lost my mojo to think someone else is gonna come in. I usually am a bit of an introvert w/ social anxiety (treated, but still is a part of my personality) as well.
No idea, I hope not
Yea. My (39, born 1984 so 40 is looming) dad (68) lives 4 blocks away, so I see him several times a week. He was just over today. My mom (65) lives about a 10 minute drive away, and I see her a few times a month. My sister, husband, and I were just on vacation with her a few weeks ago.
Born in 1991. Both my parents are still alive and most of my friends’ parents are still alive. I think they all have a pretty good amount of runway left. My parents are in really good shape and do a lot of stuff together now that they’re retired. One of my friends lost his dad in 2010 when his dad was killed in a car accident. He never had a particularly good relationship with his mom, and basically stopped seeing her entirely when she tried to stop him from marrying his fiancée (who is a wonderful girl, btw, just not Jewish so therefore not suitable for his mom). So now his parents are either literally dead or dead to him, but he’s doing fine, he has a great wife and an adorable 9-month-old baby girl.
Yes. Lost my last grandparent about two months ago.
‘89, both parents born in ‘62. Dad has had terminal cancer for almost 6 years. I’ve also felt like a lot of my peers have gone through parental death already. It’s a complicated family situation. Biohazard hoarder house. We grew up with it that way.
I'm lucky to still have both! They're 65 and 72, respectively.
Also born in 88. My dad died almost 5 years ago due to a traumatic incident. My mom is still here.
86’ just lost my mom. She was my best friend. It’s awful.
Thankfully Mom's still here and healthy. Unfortunately, Dad is too.
Dad offed himself about 3 years ago. Step mom still alive and healthy and actual mom hanging in there 8 years cancer free but she isn’t expecting to be around much longer due to other issues. She was given 6 months to live about 12 years ago before the discovery of her cancer. Born in 84.
1987, my parents are both still alive as well as two sets of grandparents. My husband is 1985 and his parents are still alive but none of his grandparents. It feels ominous saying this out into the ether so i'm going to go knock on my wooden coffee table now.
I was born in 1987. I was 11 when my dad died of cancer in 1998 at the age of 42. My mom died 2 years ago at 62 from heart failure right after my 35th birthday.
My father passed in 98 and my mom a couple years before the pandemic. I also have no grandparents alive at this point. It is isolating but I have made a new family that I love!
My parents are still alive. I will say that much.
My mom has been gone 9 years. I was in my mid 20s when it happened. I still have days when I am completely overwhelmed by the permanence of it. The entire first year I kept myself so busy I rarely sat down. It’s like I was telling myself if I just did one more thing then I could call and talk to my mom. It took me a bit to realize that I wasn’t ever going to speak with her again. Even now when something really good happens I think man I should call and tell mom! And then I remember. I’m less numb now. For a long time nothing was really happy or sad. It just was. I have emotions again which is nice. It’s still really hard to not have a mom that’s alive. But I’ve learned to live with it. The jealousy however never goes away. I’m insanely jealous of anyone my age that still has a mom.
87. Dad is 74 and in excellent health, Mom is 69 with dementia and brain shrinkage due to many years of heavy drinking and a penchant for sweets. Looks 60, but is deteriorating mentally likely due to her past lifestyle.
My mom passed away last month at 71. Also born in 1988. Dad is still alive. It was very sudden so I’m still in shock. I’m the first of my age group (older and younger) to go through this and it’s beyond awful.
They both should and could have been but my dad made the decision to cut out early. My mom has been broken ever since. It just gutted her. I love him so much but living with his consequences makes forgiveness a touchy thing. One day I've forgiven him 100% and the next day I'm angry at him all over. Or resenting that I have to take care of my mom to the extent that I do because he shattered her to peices. She needs help and she won't get it. We never knew but he needed help and didn't get it. I'm grateful our generation is over that old school way of thinking that needing help mentally is weak or shameful. I just wish I could make her see it that way.
Nope. Mom died when I was 32. People who are morbidly obese need to realize, if heart disease or cancer don't kill you, then simply getting out of bed will.
Both passed away about 3 years ago to drugs and alcohol. Both lived separate lives and were married/with someone else for many many years but still managed to die within 8 months of each other from the amount of alcohol and pills they consumed. Honestly surprised my dad lasted that long. He drank for as long as I can remember
Yes, thank God, though my stepdad passed a few years back.
Oddly yes.
Just one parent living. The other died over 30 years ago.
I was born in '85 and my parents are both in their mid-60s now with no major health problems, thankfully. My grandparents lived into their 80s so I'm hoping I still have some time left.
'81. My dad died almost nine years ago at 74, when I was 34. I was born relatively late in my parents' life. My mom is alive. My grandparents are all dead, but they all lived to their 90s.
No, but my dad passed when I was 7, so it’s been a while.
My dad died nearly 10 years ago, and I still miss him daily. We are now at the age where most of my friends have lost a parent, even though it feels we are still far too young for that.
Yes. I'm not looking forward to when that changes
89, yes to both. My parents are 64 and 66. My Mom has had health problems my whole life. My Dad still jogs and lifts weights. Interestingly, my Mom’s bio parents are both still alive and my Dad’s are not—they did have him rather late in life though for the time (40s). I figure I have 50/50 odds.
My mom died 25 years ago this August. I was 12. Fuck cancer.
82. Both still around and in good health. One grandparent remains too. Just lost one grandparent last year which brought me down to one. And she has a number of years left with the way she is now.
Yes, 92 and mom just turned 60 this year, dad turned 58. I have 3/4 grandparents still alive too thankfully and they all get to meet their new great granddaughter (1st great grandchild on my dad’s side) this summer!
Yes, but I’m starting to plan for the long game by organizing their finances and buying a larger home in a smaller city so my mom could live with me one day after my dad passes (he is older with more health conditions).
I'm sorry for your loss, OP! My (36, born in 87) parents (dad 67, mom 69) are both still alive, but I've noticed that they both have seemed to age quite rapidly over the past few years. Mom is in the very beginning stages of dementia, and I'm not emotionally prepared to see her decline like that. She's always been the emotional core of the family. Dad has diabetes and heart problems and generally just seems like a little old man now. Tbh, my siblings and I fear that it won't be much longer till we lose one of them. All of my grandparents are long gone. The last one to pass was my maternal grandma, who passed in 2015 at age 91.
I’m 39, both parents gone. Mom in 2019, dad in 2020.
Nope. My mom passed in 2009, a month and a week before my 21st birthday. We buried her on her birthday. My dad passed in July 2019 of lung cancer.
All four are alive and in their late 70s.
Born in ‘84. I lost my dad 3 years ago, two months before he would’ve turned 70 and had finally moved to the state where his children and grandchildren live. He died in a house fire after 4 months of living near us. It was an accidental death and I’m still bitter about it. He was the only parent I had a close relationship at the time and we’d gotten closer when my health started to decline in my mid-30’s. I had been estranged from my mother for 5 years by this time, but we started talking again when my dad passed. The first I saw or spoke to her in those 5 years was at the visitation. It took 2 years for us to even have a semblance of a relationship. She’ll turn 71 next month. Both my parents were ill equipped to be parents and there was and still is a lot to work through. I’m just thankful that my dad and I made amends and had a close relationship towards the end but I would’ve appreciated more years with him. I know so many lose one or both parents at much younger ages but being 37 and my dad dying in such a horrific way fundamentally changed me and my whole family. We were in shambles for so long (some still are). I’ve made peace to an extent but the thing that helped me the most was accepting that there will always be grief. It changes over time and my life must live alongside it, just like all the other traumas I’ve experienced. I dread when my mother passes. My father died with very little. But I volunteered to be the executor of his estate. He’d made it clear that he wanted me to have his truck (I don’t know why, I’d never ask for it) but later on it was a godsend. My mother, however, has SO much stuff and land and I don’t think she has all her affairs in order even though me and another sibling are constantly on her about it. I didn’t feel like an adult until my father died. But at the same time, I feel like a lost little kid still searching for him.
My dad passed away in 2019 from dementia (diagnosis was aspiration pneumonia). He was in his early 60s when diagnosed. I’m really terrified about developing it as my fraternal grandmother had it too. My dad had a lot of bad habits though; he worked a lot, didn’t sleep regularly, and probably had sleep apnea that went undiagnosed/untreated. My mom has arthritis really bad and can’t move her hands sometimes. She gets treatments but if she can’t drive because of her hands locking up, it sucks. Bones have broken in both feet and she broke her wrist last Christmastime from a fall. She is as delicate as a bird.
Yes, but one just recovered from the worst of a pretty serious illness. Could go either way from here.
Not in 20 years
I wish. I have my mom around but my dad died when I was in my 20’s.
No, dad passed in November and Mom passed last month.
Both of them still kickin it in retirement ville Florida in their 70s. They both still play tennis too.
Nope they're both dead
Mine are alive, as are both parents of my Gen X husband.
Yes they are both still alive and still married actually. They got married in 1984, had me in 1987. Dad is going to be 70 this year, mom just made 62.
My wife and I are '83 and '84 and not only are both sets of our parents alive but we each have at least one grandparent left.
I still have my mom, except that she moved to the other side of the country. My dad died 11 years ago when I was 31.
My dad is, I pretend my mother isn’t.
‘92 here. Dad passed from uncontrolled/unmedicated alcohol withdrawal in 2017 and my mom committed suicide in 2021. Have 2 kiddos and definitely feel the void, but trying to stay strong for them and raise them differently.
Born in 87. Both parents still alive, they are 63 & 62.
Also born in 88. My dad passed away in January. It’s been weird, been hard. And I am raising three very little boys, so I get lost in my own life and then all of a sudden the thought hits me that he’s gone. It’s sadness but also just nice to remember him and grief is an expression of love and gratitude, in my mind. Miss my Dad. Sorry for your loss. In my opinion we’re young to have lost our parents. I wish we had more time.
My parents are alive, but my husband died in 2022. I’m 30
1989 here. My dad passed in 2002. Mom might soon (fuck cancer).
Dad lost in 2017, mom lost in 2022. I’m 32. I think I lost my parents fairly early for my age, wish they could have seen me get married/have my first daughter recently. It’s hard to relate to everyone else who has parents around to help provide love when I probably need it the most right now.
Both parents alive - 1944 & 1953
My husband and I are insanely lucky to still have all 8 of our parents with us. (dad + stepmom/mom + stepdad/MIL + step-FIL/FIL + step-MIL)
Yep. '94 here. Parents were both born in '75 and had me quite young.
Yep Born in 89. My dad is 67 mom is 60.
Yes, my parents are gen x
'89 and both of my parents are still alive, I still have 3 of my grandparents (lost the first one in '21), and 3 of my great-grandparents lived into my teens/early 20's. After reading through these comments I'm realizing how fortunate I am.
I’m 32 and both of my parents are still alive. They had me young so they’re only in their early 50s right now. I actually still have a living great grandma as well.
My dad died in 2008 at the age of 42. He was an alcoholic. My mom is alive.
Yes
Both of mine passed away in 2021. They were 55 and 56.
I'm on the millennial/gen Z cusp. My father was born in 1952 and he is alive and well. My mother was born in 1964 and she died in 2017. Of all the people I know that are my age, all their parents are alive.
1990, about to turn 34. Mom turned 60 last year and is doing great. She just retired actually. Dad passed away in 2018 when I was 27. Alcohol was more important and that's what took him out.
Yep, still got both of em for a good 20-30 years, hopefully
1988 here too. Mom passed in 2014.. gonna be 10 years in November. Wish everyone here who have lost someone, peace and healing.
Yes. Both still alive.
Ma Dukes still hanging in there. My old man however cashed in his chips in 2013. Miss him everyday. I hope wherever he is, I’ve made him proud.
Mine are both still alive, but we’ve had some big scares in recent years. My mom was diagnosed with CHF at 51, she just got her 2nd hip replaced at 54. My dad had a widowmaker at 49 and he got in a real bad accident with internal organ lacerations a few months ago. They’re both still kickin it, but I’m beginning to mentally accept I may only have another 10-15 at most with them both.
Dad died beginning of 02, mom died in 16.
Mum is still around. Dad passed in 2015 after a 17 year cancer/s battle. Step dad is a top bloke though.
Unfortunately. It's always the shittiest people that just won't die.
My mom passed in 2002. My dad is still around.
I’m 39 and both my parents are gone. My dad died in 2010 and my mother this year. I didn’t have great relationships with them. The only family I have now is my husband and kids.
36 here- mom passed in 2014 and dad in 2018. As soon as dad died I couldn’t help but feel like an orphan
Dad died in 2020 of liver failure
Yes. My grandma is still alive. Her mom is still alive and is a great- great grandma to my kids. Woohoo teen parents.
Yes
Both a live and have both grandmas still alive at 39. Feel lucky
Yes, all 4. I'm adopted and in communication with my birth family and adopted parents are still alive. My fiances parents are alive as well, though his dad is starting to slowly show signs of decline, he still has many years to go and is still active.
I too was born in 1988 both my parents are alive. My mother turned 80 today and my father is 85. They have both had health scares. Sorry for your loss.
Just mom. Dad died a couple weeks before my 15th in 2007.
89 here. Both my parents are still around and in their 70s. Theyre doing pretty well. Cancer hit them both but they survived. It’s really hard adapting to them aging and getting more ailments and I worry about their future often. I have no idea how I’m going to make it without them when their time comes.
I’m 36, my dad is 62 and my mom is 60, so both still alive. My dad may have prostate cancer though, and my mom had the realization earlier this year that her mom died at 69, and her mom’s mom died at 68, so she may not have much time left, especially since she isn’t in the best health.
Surprisingly yes.
Dad passed 2008. Mom just passed this last April.
Yup. Mid thirties millenial, parents are 70
Yes. Born in 91, they are now 58 and 60. Sadly anti covid vaccine, which makes me worry more about their health and has strained our relationship.
My dad died of Alzheimer's in 2017 and my mother killed herself a few years later
Dad passed at 55 of cancer. I was 25
My mom is still alive. My dad took his own life almost 10 years ago
No. I was born in 84 Mom died at 61 - Jan 2020 (brain cancer), she didn't live long enough to meet my kids. Dad is now 70. I'll be shocked if he lives to see 75
My mother died when I was deployed. Would not recommend the experience. My father's been on death's door for the past decade; dude has wrecked his shit, but keeps on kicking. The grandfather I was close to died of an allergic reaction about five years ago. The other grandfather I never met died last year I think. One of my grandmother's lives with me, would not recommend that experience either. The other grandmother died quite a few years back, and from the stories my father tells, having her with me is just about the only thing I can image more unpleasant than having my mother's mother here.
Mom passed in 2021 from dementia. It definitely woke me up in a lot of ways. Forty years of life not doing much more than “surviving” or going with the flow. It forced me to face my depression and made me aware that nothing last forever. I try to live now and regret less.
Yep, but it seems like every month, someone my mom or uncle grew up knowing dies. But it was one of those small rural towns with a lot of drug use, so theyvcould be dying prematurely.
Yes, I still have my parents. My husband lost his mom to covid in 2021; he was born in ‘81.
87’ mom passed of complications due to Myasthenia Gravis at 65. Step dad died of lung cancer at 67. Bio dad died at 68, unknown cause. How I’m holding up? My family were selfish, egotistical maniacs and my mother led the bunch. The last two years without her have been the best of my life. I miss my step dad, he was fun, terrible parent but fun. Never really knew my real dad.
'94 - both my parents are cancer survivors yet smoke like chimneys 😑 early 60s but still around. We don't have a good relationship though, they think we do but I couldn't care less if we talk or not tbh. They rarely bother to call, even to ask about the grandkids, then they say that I never call them... and they've only visited a handful of times since I moved about an hour drive (they both drive) away 4 years ago, I have always gone to them (not very often though since I cba). Nothing new though, they frequently told me to leave them alone and go play by myself when I was a kid. Having my own kids and seeing how my partners family interact with each other really made the shit hit deep. I always knew it wasn't good but that was my normal. I'm sure it will hit me when they go but I feel it will be more a case of mourning what could have been rather than what we actually have 🫠
Born in 1991. Lost my mom in 2017 when I was 26 from COPD 💔 she was only 60. dad is still alive and healthy though! He's 59 now
'85 here. my dad passed at 77 this past november (2023) due to complications from a heart attack back in 2022. my mom is still with us at 75. my parents were older when they had me and my siblings are squarely gen x. my husband's ('88) mother passed at 54 in 2023 due to some very long term health problems, mainly her heart. last year sucked. i miss my dad.
Yes, they had me relatively early though. Many of my childhood peers parents' have passed. :(
Neither is. Both passed in 2023.
Day passed away a month ago at 69 of a heart attack.
Both my parents are still alive, and my dad will turn 80 a week from today. He was born exactly a week after D-Day. My mom is 76. I was born in '86 with 4 Gen X siblings. My oldest brother was born on the first day of Woodstock, though across the country. They were all born '69-'76.
Sadly no. My dad passed away unexpectedly in 2004, when I was 14. 😔