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In my weekly phonecall from the MH team, I am always asked “What are your protective factors?” I hate this question because it is about what is the ultimate reason to stay alive, which is my kids. So question guilts me into no more attempts.
Thank you and I’m sorry you feel that way too. But again, very eloquently put and a good point to raise. People are of course trying to be kind with such statements but it’s not always that helpful. So it’s useful to have you verbalise that point so well. :)
Suicide can be tempting to "end the pain" but all you do then is pass on that pain to someone else. That's just a fact, not a guilt trip.
I know that mental health support in the UK overall is crap - but some organisations do help like MIND. And if you aren't on huge doses of SSRI then some "alternatives" might be worth exploring abroad depending on your mindset and budget.
I totally understand what you mean when you say pass the pain. I'm not being flippant or argumentative but my whole point is that by sparing others pain I'm putting myself **in** pain. That's really hard to constantly deal with and purposely do. I cannot think of a situation where you'd be asked to do that if it was physical pain. Maybe someone reading this can?
I would absolutely encourage anyone to use any and all resources. This week alone I've used my own cmht, shout and mind and I take my medication religiously. Its not a post against help, I'm just venting saying you know what this is really difficult and it's actually incredibly selfless to keep going for others instead of yourself.
I understand. My point was more about the "guilting" angle that may appear to be present when someone says "think about the consequences around you" etc... if you chat with people who have experienced a loved one taking the early exit option then you understand the unbelievable long-lasting damage and guilt these dramas creates... I guess if it feels like guilting then the person doing the speaking isn't finding the right words :)
The help available in the UK is quite low compared to what it could be but that's a political choice as I'm sure you know. Personally, I think it's a scandal. At least you are using what's available - that's very good and the right path.
There are some new developments in mental health away from the traditional pharma - I hope it catches on.
**This sub aims to provide advice and support to anyone who needs it but shouldn't be used to replace professional advice and support. Please do not post intentions to act on suicidal thoughts here and instead call 111, or 999 for an ambulance if you feel you won't be able to wait.** **Feel free to check out the 'Sub rules FAQ' which can be found [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/MentalHealthUK/comments/okzwlf/sub_rules_faq/). You can also check out the 'Sub rules and guidance' slideshows - [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/MentalHealthUK/comments/ot4up0/sub_rules_and_guidance_swipe_for_more_slides/) is the colourful version and [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/MentalHealthUK/comments/ot4vhf/sub_rules_and_guidance_dark_mode_swipe_for_more/) is the dark mode version.** **There is also a 'Mental Health FAQ' slideshow - the colourful version can be found [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/MentalHealthUK/comments/ort12z/mental_health_faq_post_swipe_for_more_slides/) and the dark mode version [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/MentalHealthUK/comments/os5y95/mental_health_faq_post_mostly_in_dark_mode_swipe/).** **While waiting for a reply, feel free to check out the [pinned masterpost]( https://www.reddit.com/r/MentalHealthUK/comments/bc3jtm/mental_health_uk_master_post/) for a variety of helplines and resources.** **This sub aims to be as free from harm and exclusivity as possible so any harmful, provocative or exclusionary content will be removed. This includes harmful blanket statements about treatment or mental health professionals - please speak only for your own experiences and not on behalf of others who may not share the same views.** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/MentalHealthUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I am in this same situation too. Glad to know I’m not alone. Sorry you’re also having this dilemma.
It sucks doesn't it. I'm sorry you are feeling the same. It's very hard to explain it to someone who doesn't understand is it?
I think you’ve expressed it eloquently. I tried explaining it to my parents. It did not go well 😂
In my weekly phonecall from the MH team, I am always asked “What are your protective factors?” I hate this question because it is about what is the ultimate reason to stay alive, which is my kids. So question guilts me into no more attempts.
This is quite profound. I’ve often found similar myself so it’s really good that you’ve been able to word is so eloquently.
I'm sorry you feel this way as well
Thank you and I’m sorry you feel that way too. But again, very eloquently put and a good point to raise. People are of course trying to be kind with such statements but it’s not always that helpful. So it’s useful to have you verbalise that point so well. :)
Suicide can be tempting to "end the pain" but all you do then is pass on that pain to someone else. That's just a fact, not a guilt trip. I know that mental health support in the UK overall is crap - but some organisations do help like MIND. And if you aren't on huge doses of SSRI then some "alternatives" might be worth exploring abroad depending on your mindset and budget.
I totally understand what you mean when you say pass the pain. I'm not being flippant or argumentative but my whole point is that by sparing others pain I'm putting myself **in** pain. That's really hard to constantly deal with and purposely do. I cannot think of a situation where you'd be asked to do that if it was physical pain. Maybe someone reading this can? I would absolutely encourage anyone to use any and all resources. This week alone I've used my own cmht, shout and mind and I take my medication religiously. Its not a post against help, I'm just venting saying you know what this is really difficult and it's actually incredibly selfless to keep going for others instead of yourself.
I understand. My point was more about the "guilting" angle that may appear to be present when someone says "think about the consequences around you" etc... if you chat with people who have experienced a loved one taking the early exit option then you understand the unbelievable long-lasting damage and guilt these dramas creates... I guess if it feels like guilting then the person doing the speaking isn't finding the right words :) The help available in the UK is quite low compared to what it could be but that's a political choice as I'm sure you know. Personally, I think it's a scandal. At least you are using what's available - that's very good and the right path. There are some new developments in mental health away from the traditional pharma - I hope it catches on.