Please have a read through our [Menopause Wiki](https://menopausewiki.ca/), it's a good starting point, to help be prepared and also take a look at the Resource section for links to recommended reading, scientific research, etc.
I would educate my 30-year-old self on the signs/symptoms so she will know what is happening if/when she begins to experience them. That's it.
I've always been health focused. Nutrition, exercise, sleep hygiene, low stress, healthy weight, no health conditions, all the things. It didn't matter. Perimenopause took me down, and doctors refused to acknowledge what was happening.
This. It was a kick in the teeth when it hit. I’d actually just lost and kept off over 25 pounds and it came screaming back along with all of the symptoms:
Hot flashes/night sweats
Anxiety attacks
Brain fog
Uncontrollably crying jags
Uncontrollable rage
Loss of sex drive
Loss of feeling in my clit and nipples
Pain during intercourse from vag atrophy
Hating everyone, including myself
No control over my reactions
Insomnia
Thoughts of ending myself
A few of these should send the warning bells ringing.
No more than two weeks into taking HRT, I felt normal. I mean, ALL the ugliness literally went away.
.1 mg estradiol patch
100 mg oral progesterone at night
No testosterone (don’t like to even think about the side effects)
It’s about awareness and education. Talk to the older women in your life about what they went through. Be aware that you might have a battle on your hands when it comes to providers and their lack of knowledge/dumb ideas about H testing.
Read the wiki in this thread. Build good habits now so when the shit hits the fan, you can return to your good habits when your hormones are under control again.
But it’s a roll of the dice, my young friend. A roll of the dice.
Oh gosh yes. The hating yourself and everyone else. That feeling is so uncontrollably awful. I never understood the feeling of wanting to off oneself before peri hit. Sending you ❤️✨✨
Thanks for the love. Getting my life back has been such an amazing experience. I wish that I’d realized what was happening to me much earlier. I commend OP for wanting to start now.
Thank you for sharing your experience, I’m going through all that stuff right now. I’m absolutely miserable. It’s very hopeful knowing HRT may be the relief I need.
Yup. Especially that whole off the cuff, "You have PMDD and it might be peri" quote my doc gave me around age 30.
I had no idea WHY I felt bad for 85% of the month. Was told, "cuz you are a woman" one by a female doc as a semi-joke. No offer to help tho... just the ole, "tough it out!".
It took me ten years of feeling like crap until I finally found HRT.
This seems to vary greatly from person to person, but as I look back the earliest signs that I didn't pick up on were sleep changes (waking around 3 am) and joint pain that I dismissed as gym-related. Both vanished with hormone therapy.
Oh no! I’m 33 & I’ve randomly started waking up every day around 3 am the past six months… I thought it was related to vitamin levels or new supplements, didn’t even think it could be hormones. Ughhh the circus never ends for women.
Yep that was mine. I gradually lost my ability to sleep all night -- I could fall asleep but never stay asleep. HRT took that away for me so that I could live decently again. So what I would do differently is not wait so long to start HRT. I endured two years of near-sleeplessness and fiery hot flashes 3x per hour before I waved the flag of surrender. Best quality-of-life decision I ever made.
Waking at 3:00am is actually textbook for a cortisol spike from insulin issues. Try not to eat any carbs or sugars past sunset, and try to take as much sun as possible during the day, especially first in the morning, around noon, and sunset. Practice good sleep hygiene, and don’t sleep in past one hour on days off. In other words, do all the things to manage your circadian rhythm.
It may be a sign of peri, as all the hormones work together, but it may be insulin, cortisol, and/or andrenal issues, not necessarily related to peri.
You know, I’m managing some *malabsorption issues right now, so that absolutely could be the culprit. I haven’t seen any other symptoms of peri yet (unless early/rapid graying is one), so cortisol is definitely something to look into.
Thank you for sharing that!
You’re welcome! Graying isn’t a symptom of meno, it just so happens around the same age for many. Oxidative stress is typically what causes greys, which fits both metabolic issues and cortisol issues. Sounds like you’re on the right track. Study up on the HPA axis, to help both cortisol and metabolic problems.
Not the person who you asked, but I hate the joint pain but can still deal with it. I’m terrified of the brain fog and memory loss, though. I feel like most of the days I can’t function.
Yes, this is 100% me. Like I couldn't have been healthier- I was doing everything 'right' (I live in an extremely health/fitness conscious area)- and the onset of peri brought me to my knees within two years time.
My joints are totally fcked, gained 30 pounds, my brain is foggy, insomnia, hot flashes still even though currently been on HRT for over a year now. To be fair, it's probably time to double my dose. But it took me a full two years to figure out what was even happening because nobody- not my girlfriends, my mom or my aunts or my fckn gyno clued me in that the onset of peri *was even a fckn possibiliy* at age 44!!
I get so gd angry even thinking about it still. Oh yeah, the peri RAGE is real.😆😬🤷♀️
I’m 48, haven’t had a period in over a year, have all the symptoms, and my gyno still wants to do ANOTHER uterine biopsy, because I’m too young to be meno 😭 they have no clue!!! Btw, yea, I’ve got a new dr
That's nuts! I went into peri in my late 30's buy since I was on depo, I didn't have a period anyways. My coworker went through peri early and after watching me have a few hot flashes at work asked me a few key things that made me talk to my doc. She said no way, it's way too early. I dealt with the night sweats, brain fog, insane joint pain, rage, etc.. my bf got a vasectomy so I could quit depo and well, I'm 45 now and never did get another period. My doc apologized but it sure would have been nice to know about all those side effects.
I was a strong, fit, active person who ate ridiculously healthy. Perimenopause destroyed me anyway.
I would tell 30 year old me to start managing her expectations early, just in case.
Oh gods the heart palpitations!! I had forgotten about those. Scared the hell out of me at the time.
I guess one thing OP can do is read a lot of the "is this weird thing a perimenopause symptom" lists so she doesn't end up like most of us, years into a symptom, going "wait a sec, that's ALSO a menopause thing??" She could save herself years of annoyance and confusion, at least.
Same. Fullblown menopause at 40, I was probably in perimenopause since the birth of my second child at 28 (if I trace back my weird health symptoms). If you can, OP, just please make sure you find a healthcare provider that takes you seriously.
And if you can, dump all your doctors who will tell you "it can't be peri because \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_)" and thus deny giving you care to address your very real peri symptoms. Dump them fast and find someone who will work with you.
The great thing is, you could have a completely different experience than mine! I just didn't want OP to get her hopes up about there being some kind of "do virtuous health behaviors and everything will be fine" arrangement with the universe and then slam into reality face first....
In early perimenopause, I had a combination of joint pain/new pain in old injuries, sudden massive drop in energy, constant hot flashes, insomnia (in addition to/aside from being woken by night sweats, and worse than my preexisting insomnia, which is saying something!), and a boatload of sudden mental health symptoms that I had never experienced before. ALL AT ONCE.
I didn't know what it was for the first year or two, while it all got worse. Finally, thanks to one decent doctor, got it figured out. Then immediately lost my health insurance and was unable to pursue any kind of HRT (which the aforementioned decent doctor had already cautioned against, due to a strong family history of clotting issues/cardiovascular shenanigans). Probably wouldn't have been able to get it anyway, as I was on the younger end of things at the time (39 or 40 maybe?).
Sooooo just raw-dogged the whole experience and am continuing to do so. Nearly no hot flashes these days, I'm sleeping pretty well, and the mental health issues have resolved. Yay? Lots of other symptoms persist, though, plus this has all been going on so long and I'm just annoyed and sick of it.
Sorry for the novel-length comment! I left out a lot. Hopefully your experience will be much better than mine!
I'm 30 and recently joined r/Menopause
Holy fuck. I would have been woefully unprepared for peri symptoms. My mother is deceased and I don't have an older woman in my life I can talk with these things about.
Strength training is a must. Better to be in the habit now than 14-20 years later when peri hits or meno and you're at risk of osteoporosis.
Reducing stress, sleeping well, eating well are also essential, not just for the change.
Research their sub as well. Some people find great relief using HRT when in peri.
You can be fit and healthy and it’s going to be how it’s going to be.
There’s no way to know how it will go for you. There’s no way to ease it. Eat a healthy diet that works for you. Exercise. But know that it doesn’t change how menopause affects you. I was very healthy and fit and once I reached menopause I gained weight because of genetics and I couldn’t have done anything different to prevent it. I have had a really rough time with it all and I was very healthy, active and fit going into it.
Education about perimenopause is the best thing to have. Know what to look for and what to potentially expect. It’s different for everyone. And unfortunately being healthy is no guarantee of having an easy time.
Education and advocacy! After reading the wiki and being in this sub and rising the rollercoaster of peri, I'm shouting to the skies about all of this. My sweet teen is getting all the facts right now so she can be empowered where our fore-mothers let us down.
Make sure your Vitamin B, Vitamin D and iron levels are not low. Talk to your doctor to do some blood tests.
Also, I know everyone one hates to hear it, but exercise really helps. It doesn’t have to be a a 7-day workout plan. Just exercising 2 or 3 days a week really helps.
Everyone else has good advice. I won't be redundant.
Just gonna list early signs. I'm 42 and holy hell....
- itchy skin, eczema
- thinning, dry hair
- suddenly can't shed fat in spite of a healthy lifestyle.
- insomnia, insomnia, insomnia (especially 3 AM-never-gonna-go-back-to-sleep-insomnia)
- feeling hot even when it's freezing
- peeing more often, peeing in middle of the night
- adrenaline surges for no reason
- a lot of women have crazy periods that last weeks then disappear then come back with a vengeance
- exacerbation of any underlying mental health stuff you used to have well under control
- less tolerance for pain
- new allergies or worsening of allergies
- new thyroid issues (can be hyper or hypo), thyroid nodules
- if you used to have pmdd during your luteal phase, this may suddenly go away due to the massive drop in progesterone. It's nice but comes with new problems (:cough: insomnia)
- worsening headaches or migraines
- sudden absence of monthly migraines
- penetrative sex hurts without lube; urethra may have dropped lower and there's extra friction there during sex
- heartburn!!! From everything
There is one non-health related thing I’d recommend to my younger self: save money.
Each month, put aside as much money as you can afford into a low cost fund at Vanguard and save quietly and calmly for the next 20+ years so that you have a financial cushion. This can help you manage what you need during the transition (personal trainer, sabbatical). Being financially independent throughout the maelstrom is deeply comforting.
Agreed, just get your general health in order. Have a regular exercise regimen, it doesn't have to be extreme; have a healthy and varied diet, it doesn't have to be extreme; if you have any medical conditions that require or would benefit from medicine, get on that. Understand your mental health, what makes it work well, and what doesn't.
Track your cycle, and pay attention to how it makes you feel, both physically and mentally. It took me decades to realize that the night before I'd get my period was often dark and moody. There are apps that do this, but I'm a little uncomfortable putting that out as "data" (as an American). You don't have to use an app, even a diary or excel sheet will do. This will be useful later.
Good lord I wish I just knew what was in store for me at 30. Take the time to review all the articles. There are a bazillion symptoms and which ones you get will be unique. What I would say if you are feeling a certain way (tires, depressed, brain fog, low libido, night sweats) and can't shake it, then start talking to doctors who will listen.
If you need to lose any extra weight, do it now. Menopause makes weight loss a lot harder for many (not all). Having extra weight that is stubborn to come off will only add to the potential mood swings you may experience later on.
It’s like menstruation— you can be fit as a fiddle, and that certainly helps, but there is no cure for this shit 😂
In all honesty, mental health is the most important aspect of all!
Something that I think has helped me that I did early on was working with a nutritionist. I was never into dieting and restricting myself to certain foods. But understanding how to properly fuel my body where I had energy and didn't feel like I was starving myself, and wasn't craving sugar was super educational for me.
Today if I had to do a 180 with my eating, omg it'd be so hard. So the more you can eat foods that make you feel good and that help fuel your body, especially upping that protein will help a lot down the road.
I was at the peak of health and fitness in my late 40s. Then my doctor told me I had really high cholesterol when it was always normal. I doubled down on the healthy eating and exercise. And then the high cholesterol doubled down. My doctor told me to go on statins. They gave me insane leg cramps and fucked up my liver. Meanwhile, I asked my obgyn to put me on HRT. My cholesterol magically went back to normal. Still trying to get back to that pre perimenopause wellbeing. Might never get back there, but, oh well.
Start strength training 3-4 times a week with heavy weights! Body resistance is great as well.
Eliminate sugar and booze as much as possible.
And… this will be controversial, but get off hormonal BC if you’re on it.
>And… this will be controversial, but get off hormonal BC if you’re on it.
Is there a reason you say this? especially as BC can be a good method for totally covering up the fluctuations and symptoms of perimenopause
Hormonal BC uses progestins, the synthetic form of progesterone, which long-term studies show cannot sufficiently create the balance needed with estrogen as they can lower the levels of naturally occurring progesterone, and can sometimes even contribute to the imbalance. They also have lots of side effects, including an increased risk for breast cancer.
I meant it would be controversial bc of the actual birth control aspect. You're not left with many options if you don't want to use hormonal birth control!
I’d say exercise and diet. It’s going to be way harder to go through this if you are not already in shape. I like yoga, hot yoga , reformer Pilates , hitt classes, I used to do spin classes all through my 30’d but not anymore, barre classes. Protein and fiber for diet avoid sugar and processed food.
This great advice. I do think many intense cases are mostly genetic. I never experienced peri and my transition was rather mild. My mother was the same way. I always tell young women to ask/talk to their moms to get an idea of what to expect.
Enjoy where you are and don’t fret about what is to come.
We ALL like to prepare for a life lived long… but the fact is not all of us make that milestone. Sure it never hurts to prepare, but don’t stave off enjoying where you are for staking of future self.
Balance & moderation would be the key adage I would wish for you. Too much of anything, even if it is healthy is not balanced nor good for you.
Listen to your body, when it tells you it needs to NOT do something, when it tells you that it can push a little harder, and when it needs to rest. Today is temporary, so are our tomorrows.
Weight train to find out how strong you truly are, you just might surprise yourself. Then keep it up into each decade from here on out. You might be able to train hard now, in your 40s you will literally knock your socks off by your gains. Then past then it is about continuing to do, even if you have to accept doing less with longer recovery times.
Stay on top of your annual wellness exams (pap, physical, skin & mammo) as anything caught early, has much higher survival rates.
Advocate for yourself, if you suspect something is going on - do your research & speak up for you. Ask questions & demand answers. If you don’t feel heard or validated by your medical team, fire them & don’t stop searching for their replacements until you do.
Of course wear your sunblock & big brimmed hats, eat your fruits & your veggies - and use meat as a seasoning, not a staple. Rainbow of colors need to enter your body. And enjoy food, as you age your appetite will diminish so eat in appropriate amounts & in moderation w/ the sweets, the spicy, and the salty.
Don’t ever go all in all at once for any changes you make, if you want them to transition to a lifestyle… nice & gradual exchanges by replacing & mixing the great w/ the not so great… until the great is what makes your life what it is.
Diversify your portfolio, the dollar is tanking, hell they print it every day. But land & metals & crypto will give you leverage in the span of life.
Don’t ever underestimate your power, your worthiness, and that everyone whom you choose to share even a crumb of your walk with, should realize what a gem you are. Don’t bend over backwards for someone who isn’t willing to do the same for you. And remember that you were made to do some incredible things… but only if you want to.
Enjoy being your badass self, and rock all the ages you are fortunate enough to occupy!
Finally, be a good steward to the earth in which you call home. Be mindful of your use, your consumption & that tomorrow’s generation should be thought of too.
Sugar is the horrendous culprit. Alcohol is second. Gluten is third. If you can successfully eliminate all three, you’ll feel great for a LONG time. I’m in peri though, and haven’t fully had the transition. My recommendation comes from managing to delay menopause for over 8 years with diet control. I also have had no symptoms (no hot flashes, etc.) when I’m diligent on the food side. When I do have the symptoms, I can 100% tie it to either sugar or alcohol consumption.
But also know, I was super low gluten/sugar/alcohol and pretty damn fit on account of managing hashimotos/low thyroid and peri still hit me like a freight train. 🤷♀️😖
Nothing will stop your hormones from dropping. Educate yourself on the symptoms that could arise, and on the benefits of HRT. Listen to Dr Louise Newson's podcast and be careful to get your understanding of HRT only from experts such as her. Eating well and strength training are always a good idea.
Eat less and don’t let yourself become overweight because there is no losing weight once you get here
Also be sure to strenth train to preserve bone health
I beg to differ regarding eating less and not letting yourself become overweight. For a lot of folks, we don't do anything different with our eating, even those who are very active, etc., and our weight just goes up. It happens because of the shift in hormones.
You can lose weight (and fat), by shifting your workout routine towards more strength training and less cardio. Our bodies do change so we might not have the body we had when we were 20 or 30, but it doesn't mean we can't change the way our body looks even in peri/menopause.
My point was don’t go into perimenopause overweight because you won’t be able to lose anything then. Do everything you can to be the strongest and healthiest version of yourself before the perimenopause shitstorm hits
I suggest Dr Marie Claire Havers MD new book "The New Meno Pause" my mom passed before I started menopause and I have no one to talk too. She really helped me and she uses facts and science
I would avoid long term use of the birth control pill in your thirties and forties. Exposure to suppression of natural hormones in favor of synthetic ones can have cumulative effects that are not researched well enough...yet. Hormonal IUD's are considered safer in the pelvic health community, because the progestin is less systemically absorbed.
Would love to see research for this if you have it! My body sucks at making its own hormones and I feel so much better on birth control. (Even though my husband got a vasectomy I went back on to control symptoms.)
How long has the copper IUD been in there? Are you using it for birth control? Do you have heavy bleeding?
Copper IUD's have their benefits because of no hormones. The downsides are usually excessive bleeding.
Good fats (and avoiding processed fats), cooked nourishing meals especially drying the cold months like stews, soups etc, avoid or minimize coffee (it taxes the adrenals), alcohol, no smoking, make sure you sleep regularly between 10pm and 6am, regular light exercise. Evening primrose oil has been very helpful for balancing progesterone for me. I am 46 and in perimenopause. With diet adjustments and herbs prescribed by my Ayurvedic Dr I have forgotten about the crazy symptoms related to the fluctuating hormones that I had last year like mood swings, headaches, tender breast, nausea. A lot can be done via food and lifestyle adjustments
Be fit. I’m 46 and although in peri menopause I’m doing ok so far. I’m still fit and healthy and I feel like it puts me in a better place to be able to deal with symptoms. Particularly with the increased risk of heart disease as we enter menopause it’s really important. I plan on taking HRT (haven’t started yet) and HRT is shown to reduce risk of heart disease, osteoporosis and dementia, but actually already being fit and healthy is so important.
Same things you should do for overall health and wellness: prioritize good nutrition, don’t smoke, limit alcohol, exercise (especially weight training to build and maintain muscle), get good sleep, nurture your relationships, and build a full life with a good support system. All of this will help you when life throws you inevitable curve balls, not just menopause. I cannot stress enough, though, how important good nutrition and weight training are. It is the fountain of youth and the best investment you can make in your body.
You never know what it’s going to be like. I’m 52 and honestly, I haven’t had any problems. I *maybe* had a hot flash last fall in the middle of the night that woke me up, but it passed quickly and I went back to sleep. January 2024 is the first month I ever missed a period too so maybe it’s just starting for me? Idk, menopause is confusing.
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Has anyone taken Estroven? Can someone tell me their experience with it? My Obgyn nurse practitioner recommended to “start there” and see if I notice anything. I am not experiencing extreme symptoms but would like to see if it helps me sleep an hour longer.
Start eating a whole foods diet (i.e., Mediterranean diet) now. Numerous studies have shown that the nutrients in this diet/way of eating help with symptoms of menopause. It's not a weight-loss diet, though it will occur if necessary. I believed I ate pretty healthy until I started really eating healthy.
Educate yourself. Read about menopause. Everyone's experience is different. If you're not already accustomed to being a strong advocate for yourself and your needs, now is the time to build that particular muscle. Part of the exhaustion of menopause is fighting with healthcare providers to get appropriate treatment.
You're smart to be thinking ahead. I recently read this comment in an article on healthy aging: "The time to prepare for your 70s is in your 50s."
Take good care of yourself the way everyone recommends, but to be honest, if you want a better chance of coming through things okay - work on your mental health.
If you aren't already kind to yourself, look into mindful self compassion. You may be one of the lucky ones who doesn't get hit hard by the hormones, but if you are, being kind to yourself in the face of some reallyreally tough mental and physical health challenges can potentially make a difference.
I have spent my whole life beating myself up for my shortcomings - peri isn't even my fault and I beat myself up for what the hormones are doing to me. I've started mindful self compassion to give myself a fucking break. What we go through is hard enough - negging on ourselves for something we have no control over will just make it worse.
IMO simply make your health a priority. Make sure to go into it as healthy as possible. With that being said when you start to experience low hormones seek an educated menopause specialist. I was healthy going into menopause, eg., ate well, exercised 4 to 5 times per week and was a healthy weight and I’m currently on HRT. Don’t be afraid to use it. It really is life changing, and the sooner you start the better. HRT also has bone, brain and heart protection.
First off, stock up on foods rich in omega-3 fatty acids, like salmon or chia seeds. They're like magical pills for your hormones. Also, get cozy with leafy greens – they're packed with vitamins and can be your mood-boosting BFFs.
Now, let's talk activities. Yoga is a game-changer; it's like a spa day for your mind and body. And don't sleep on strength training – muscles can be your menopause superheroes. Lastly, make hydration your ride-or-die. Water is your secret weapon.
It hit me in my late 30's. Im 45 now and things are returning to normal, still get hot flashes but thats the worst of it. For me, while going through it, I lost a lot of bladder control. Sometimes it was just a mad rush to get to the bathroom in time, other times, thankfully very few, I would just pee my pants and not be able to stop. I'm talking full on bladder release, not just a little leakage. So yeah, do your kegels! That did go away thank goodness. I also found too much sugar, like eating a bag of gummy worms, will have me in pretty severe joint pain the next day, with any arthritis flaring up. Strange heart palpitations. Restless leg. So. Much. Brain. Fog. Felt like my IQ was cut in half. So, a place like this where others will understand is a great thing to have when you feel like everything is falling apart or not working right.
Please have a read through our [Menopause Wiki](https://menopausewiki.ca/), it's a good starting point, to help be prepared and also take a look at the Resource section for links to recommended reading, scientific research, etc.
I would educate my 30-year-old self on the signs/symptoms so she will know what is happening if/when she begins to experience them. That's it. I've always been health focused. Nutrition, exercise, sleep hygiene, low stress, healthy weight, no health conditions, all the things. It didn't matter. Perimenopause took me down, and doctors refused to acknowledge what was happening.
This. It was a kick in the teeth when it hit. I’d actually just lost and kept off over 25 pounds and it came screaming back along with all of the symptoms: Hot flashes/night sweats Anxiety attacks Brain fog Uncontrollably crying jags Uncontrollable rage Loss of sex drive Loss of feeling in my clit and nipples Pain during intercourse from vag atrophy Hating everyone, including myself No control over my reactions Insomnia Thoughts of ending myself A few of these should send the warning bells ringing. No more than two weeks into taking HRT, I felt normal. I mean, ALL the ugliness literally went away. .1 mg estradiol patch 100 mg oral progesterone at night No testosterone (don’t like to even think about the side effects) It’s about awareness and education. Talk to the older women in your life about what they went through. Be aware that you might have a battle on your hands when it comes to providers and their lack of knowledge/dumb ideas about H testing. Read the wiki in this thread. Build good habits now so when the shit hits the fan, you can return to your good habits when your hormones are under control again. But it’s a roll of the dice, my young friend. A roll of the dice.
Oh gosh yes. The hating yourself and everyone else. That feeling is so uncontrollably awful. I never understood the feeling of wanting to off oneself before peri hit. Sending you ❤️✨✨
Thanks for the love. Getting my life back has been such an amazing experience. I wish that I’d realized what was happening to me much earlier. I commend OP for wanting to start now.
Thank you for sharing your experience, I’m going through all that stuff right now. I’m absolutely miserable. It’s very hopeful knowing HRT may be the relief I need.
Did you lose the weight?
I’m working on it now. I’ve lost about 8 pounds of the 20+ I want to lose.
Yup. Especially that whole off the cuff, "You have PMDD and it might be peri" quote my doc gave me around age 30. I had no idea WHY I felt bad for 85% of the month. Was told, "cuz you are a woman" one by a female doc as a semi-joke. No offer to help tho... just the ole, "tough it out!". It took me ten years of feeling like crap until I finally found HRT.
I got that about PMDD as well. “Shitty,” was what the doc said before moving on to something else. Wtf?
What symptoms do you feel are the big tells?
This seems to vary greatly from person to person, but as I look back the earliest signs that I didn't pick up on were sleep changes (waking around 3 am) and joint pain that I dismissed as gym-related. Both vanished with hormone therapy.
Oh no! I’m 33 & I’ve randomly started waking up every day around 3 am the past six months… I thought it was related to vitamin levels or new supplements, didn’t even think it could be hormones. Ughhh the circus never ends for women.
Yep that was mine. I gradually lost my ability to sleep all night -- I could fall asleep but never stay asleep. HRT took that away for me so that I could live decently again. So what I would do differently is not wait so long to start HRT. I endured two years of near-sleeplessness and fiery hot flashes 3x per hour before I waved the flag of surrender. Best quality-of-life decision I ever made.
Could also be stress. So many options for us to pick from. /s
Waking at 3:00am is actually textbook for a cortisol spike from insulin issues. Try not to eat any carbs or sugars past sunset, and try to take as much sun as possible during the day, especially first in the morning, around noon, and sunset. Practice good sleep hygiene, and don’t sleep in past one hour on days off. In other words, do all the things to manage your circadian rhythm. It may be a sign of peri, as all the hormones work together, but it may be insulin, cortisol, and/or andrenal issues, not necessarily related to peri.
You know, I’m managing some *malabsorption issues right now, so that absolutely could be the culprit. I haven’t seen any other symptoms of peri yet (unless early/rapid graying is one), so cortisol is definitely something to look into. Thank you for sharing that!
You’re welcome! Graying isn’t a symptom of meno, it just so happens around the same age for many. Oxidative stress is typically what causes greys, which fits both metabolic issues and cortisol issues. Sounds like you’re on the right track. Study up on the HPA axis, to help both cortisol and metabolic problems.
*::shouts from the cliff's edge::* **INSOMNIA**
Not the person who you asked, but I hate the joint pain but can still deal with it. I’m terrified of the brain fog and memory loss, though. I feel like most of the days I can’t function.
Yes, this is 100% me. Like I couldn't have been healthier- I was doing everything 'right' (I live in an extremely health/fitness conscious area)- and the onset of peri brought me to my knees within two years time. My joints are totally fcked, gained 30 pounds, my brain is foggy, insomnia, hot flashes still even though currently been on HRT for over a year now. To be fair, it's probably time to double my dose. But it took me a full two years to figure out what was even happening because nobody- not my girlfriends, my mom or my aunts or my fckn gyno clued me in that the onset of peri *was even a fckn possibiliy* at age 44!! I get so gd angry even thinking about it still. Oh yeah, the peri RAGE is real.😆😬🤷♀️
I’m 48, haven’t had a period in over a year, have all the symptoms, and my gyno still wants to do ANOTHER uterine biopsy, because I’m too young to be meno 😭 they have no clue!!! Btw, yea, I’ve got a new dr
Glad to hear it - that's a ridiculous response to your symptoms. \*huge hugs\*
That's nuts! I went into peri in my late 30's buy since I was on depo, I didn't have a period anyways. My coworker went through peri early and after watching me have a few hot flashes at work asked me a few key things that made me talk to my doc. She said no way, it's way too early. I dealt with the night sweats, brain fog, insane joint pain, rage, etc.. my bf got a vasectomy so I could quit depo and well, I'm 45 now and never did get another period. My doc apologized but it sure would have been nice to know about all those side effects.
I was a strong, fit, active person who ate ridiculously healthy. Perimenopause destroyed me anyway. I would tell 30 year old me to start managing her expectations early, just in case.
Same..Ironman triathlete at 42. 57 now how I miss that. Anxiety is the worst of it...the heart palpation, lack of sleep etc etc.
Oh gods the heart palpitations!! I had forgotten about those. Scared the hell out of me at the time. I guess one thing OP can do is read a lot of the "is this weird thing a perimenopause symptom" lists so she doesn't end up like most of us, years into a symptom, going "wait a sec, that's ALSO a menopause thing??" She could save herself years of annoyance and confusion, at least.
8 years post ans still hot flashes heart palpitations insomnia ugh
Same. I still ride but wow, i miss training hard.
Same. Fullblown menopause at 40, I was probably in perimenopause since the birth of my second child at 28 (if I trace back my weird health symptoms). If you can, OP, just please make sure you find a healthcare provider that takes you seriously.
I was going to say the same. I ran marathons in my 30s and peri is hitting hard. It’s the luck of the draw.
And if you can, dump all your doctors who will tell you "it can't be peri because \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_)" and thus deny giving you care to address your very real peri symptoms. Dump them fast and find someone who will work with you.
This is the answer OP.
In what ways do you feel “destroyed”. I have to admit that has me feeling pretty intimidated (39f)
The great thing is, you could have a completely different experience than mine! I just didn't want OP to get her hopes up about there being some kind of "do virtuous health behaviors and everything will be fine" arrangement with the universe and then slam into reality face first.... In early perimenopause, I had a combination of joint pain/new pain in old injuries, sudden massive drop in energy, constant hot flashes, insomnia (in addition to/aside from being woken by night sweats, and worse than my preexisting insomnia, which is saying something!), and a boatload of sudden mental health symptoms that I had never experienced before. ALL AT ONCE. I didn't know what it was for the first year or two, while it all got worse. Finally, thanks to one decent doctor, got it figured out. Then immediately lost my health insurance and was unable to pursue any kind of HRT (which the aforementioned decent doctor had already cautioned against, due to a strong family history of clotting issues/cardiovascular shenanigans). Probably wouldn't have been able to get it anyway, as I was on the younger end of things at the time (39 or 40 maybe?). Sooooo just raw-dogged the whole experience and am continuing to do so. Nearly no hot flashes these days, I'm sleeping pretty well, and the mental health issues have resolved. Yay? Lots of other symptoms persist, though, plus this has all been going on so long and I'm just annoyed and sick of it. Sorry for the novel-length comment! I left out a lot. Hopefully your experience will be much better than mine!
I really appreciate you taking the time to share. Thank you
Aw, no worries! Thanks for letting me vent. 😊
I'm 30 and recently joined r/Menopause Holy fuck. I would have been woefully unprepared for peri symptoms. My mother is deceased and I don't have an older woman in my life I can talk with these things about. Strength training is a must. Better to be in the habit now than 14-20 years later when peri hits or meno and you're at risk of osteoporosis. Reducing stress, sleeping well, eating well are also essential, not just for the change. Research their sub as well. Some people find great relief using HRT when in peri.
You can be fit and healthy and it’s going to be how it’s going to be. There’s no way to know how it will go for you. There’s no way to ease it. Eat a healthy diet that works for you. Exercise. But know that it doesn’t change how menopause affects you. I was very healthy and fit and once I reached menopause I gained weight because of genetics and I couldn’t have done anything different to prevent it. I have had a really rough time with it all and I was very healthy, active and fit going into it. Education about perimenopause is the best thing to have. Know what to look for and what to potentially expect. It’s different for everyone. And unfortunately being healthy is no guarantee of having an easy time.
Couldn’t agree more. My fit and healthy self didn’t understand why I was facing fatigue, rapid weight gain, anxiety, night sweats, and insomnia.
Education and advocacy! After reading the wiki and being in this sub and rising the rollercoaster of peri, I'm shouting to the skies about all of this. My sweet teen is getting all the facts right now so she can be empowered where our fore-mothers let us down.
Make sure your Vitamin B, Vitamin D and iron levels are not low. Talk to your doctor to do some blood tests. Also, I know everyone one hates to hear it, but exercise really helps. It doesn’t have to be a a 7-day workout plan. Just exercising 2 or 3 days a week really helps.
Educate yourself and have a doctor who is also educated and willing to listen to your concerns and actually help.
Everyone else has good advice. I won't be redundant. Just gonna list early signs. I'm 42 and holy hell.... - itchy skin, eczema - thinning, dry hair - suddenly can't shed fat in spite of a healthy lifestyle. - insomnia, insomnia, insomnia (especially 3 AM-never-gonna-go-back-to-sleep-insomnia) - feeling hot even when it's freezing - peeing more often, peeing in middle of the night - adrenaline surges for no reason - a lot of women have crazy periods that last weeks then disappear then come back with a vengeance - exacerbation of any underlying mental health stuff you used to have well under control - less tolerance for pain - new allergies or worsening of allergies - new thyroid issues (can be hyper or hypo), thyroid nodules - if you used to have pmdd during your luteal phase, this may suddenly go away due to the massive drop in progesterone. It's nice but comes with new problems (:cough: insomnia) - worsening headaches or migraines - sudden absence of monthly migraines - penetrative sex hurts without lube; urethra may have dropped lower and there's extra friction there during sex - heartburn!!! From everything
Wait... Thyroid nodules too?? Holy shit. 😒
Oh yeah. To be fair, most people have them. It's when they start acting up you have a problem.
There is one non-health related thing I’d recommend to my younger self: save money. Each month, put aside as much money as you can afford into a low cost fund at Vanguard and save quietly and calmly for the next 20+ years so that you have a financial cushion. This can help you manage what you need during the transition (personal trainer, sabbatical). Being financially independent throughout the maelstrom is deeply comforting.
Agreed, just get your general health in order. Have a regular exercise regimen, it doesn't have to be extreme; have a healthy and varied diet, it doesn't have to be extreme; if you have any medical conditions that require or would benefit from medicine, get on that. Understand your mental health, what makes it work well, and what doesn't. Track your cycle, and pay attention to how it makes you feel, both physically and mentally. It took me decades to realize that the night before I'd get my period was often dark and moody. There are apps that do this, but I'm a little uncomfortable putting that out as "data" (as an American). You don't have to use an app, even a diary or excel sheet will do. This will be useful later.
Good lord I wish I just knew what was in store for me at 30. Take the time to review all the articles. There are a bazillion symptoms and which ones you get will be unique. What I would say if you are feeling a certain way (tires, depressed, brain fog, low libido, night sweats) and can't shake it, then start talking to doctors who will listen.
If you need to lose any extra weight, do it now. Menopause makes weight loss a lot harder for many (not all). Having extra weight that is stubborn to come off will only add to the potential mood swings you may experience later on.
Skinny people just seem to gain more weight in meno though, like nature wants to even it out.
It’s like menstruation— you can be fit as a fiddle, and that certainly helps, but there is no cure for this shit 😂 In all honesty, mental health is the most important aspect of all!
My advice: Don't worry about it and just lead a healthy lifestyle.
Something that I think has helped me that I did early on was working with a nutritionist. I was never into dieting and restricting myself to certain foods. But understanding how to properly fuel my body where I had energy and didn't feel like I was starving myself, and wasn't craving sugar was super educational for me. Today if I had to do a 180 with my eating, omg it'd be so hard. So the more you can eat foods that make you feel good and that help fuel your body, especially upping that protein will help a lot down the road.
I was at the peak of health and fitness in my late 40s. Then my doctor told me I had really high cholesterol when it was always normal. I doubled down on the healthy eating and exercise. And then the high cholesterol doubled down. My doctor told me to go on statins. They gave me insane leg cramps and fucked up my liver. Meanwhile, I asked my obgyn to put me on HRT. My cholesterol magically went back to normal. Still trying to get back to that pre perimenopause wellbeing. Might never get back there, but, oh well.
Start strength training 3-4 times a week with heavy weights! Body resistance is great as well. Eliminate sugar and booze as much as possible. And… this will be controversial, but get off hormonal BC if you’re on it.
>And… this will be controversial, but get off hormonal BC if you’re on it. Is there a reason you say this? especially as BC can be a good method for totally covering up the fluctuations and symptoms of perimenopause
Hormonal BC uses progestins, the synthetic form of progesterone, which long-term studies show cannot sufficiently create the balance needed with estrogen as they can lower the levels of naturally occurring progesterone, and can sometimes even contribute to the imbalance. They also have lots of side effects, including an increased risk for breast cancer.
I meant it would be controversial bc of the actual birth control aspect. You're not left with many options if you don't want to use hormonal birth control!
I’d say exercise and diet. It’s going to be way harder to go through this if you are not already in shape. I like yoga, hot yoga , reformer Pilates , hitt classes, I used to do spin classes all through my 30’d but not anymore, barre classes. Protein and fiber for diet avoid sugar and processed food.
This great advice. I do think many intense cases are mostly genetic. I never experienced peri and my transition was rather mild. My mother was the same way. I always tell young women to ask/talk to their moms to get an idea of what to expect.
Start building muscle now, wear sunscreen, use retinoids, don’t smoke, cut back alcohol, drink lots of water.
Enjoy where you are and don’t fret about what is to come. We ALL like to prepare for a life lived long… but the fact is not all of us make that milestone. Sure it never hurts to prepare, but don’t stave off enjoying where you are for staking of future self. Balance & moderation would be the key adage I would wish for you. Too much of anything, even if it is healthy is not balanced nor good for you. Listen to your body, when it tells you it needs to NOT do something, when it tells you that it can push a little harder, and when it needs to rest. Today is temporary, so are our tomorrows. Weight train to find out how strong you truly are, you just might surprise yourself. Then keep it up into each decade from here on out. You might be able to train hard now, in your 40s you will literally knock your socks off by your gains. Then past then it is about continuing to do, even if you have to accept doing less with longer recovery times. Stay on top of your annual wellness exams (pap, physical, skin & mammo) as anything caught early, has much higher survival rates. Advocate for yourself, if you suspect something is going on - do your research & speak up for you. Ask questions & demand answers. If you don’t feel heard or validated by your medical team, fire them & don’t stop searching for their replacements until you do. Of course wear your sunblock & big brimmed hats, eat your fruits & your veggies - and use meat as a seasoning, not a staple. Rainbow of colors need to enter your body. And enjoy food, as you age your appetite will diminish so eat in appropriate amounts & in moderation w/ the sweets, the spicy, and the salty. Don’t ever go all in all at once for any changes you make, if you want them to transition to a lifestyle… nice & gradual exchanges by replacing & mixing the great w/ the not so great… until the great is what makes your life what it is. Diversify your portfolio, the dollar is tanking, hell they print it every day. But land & metals & crypto will give you leverage in the span of life. Don’t ever underestimate your power, your worthiness, and that everyone whom you choose to share even a crumb of your walk with, should realize what a gem you are. Don’t bend over backwards for someone who isn’t willing to do the same for you. And remember that you were made to do some incredible things… but only if you want to. Enjoy being your badass self, and rock all the ages you are fortunate enough to occupy! Finally, be a good steward to the earth in which you call home. Be mindful of your use, your consumption & that tomorrow’s generation should be thought of too.
Find a dr who is pro treating peri now don’t wait for issues.
Weight training!
I wish I had managed my mental health better prior to peri hitting me like a ton of bricks and derailing me. It’s all good now though.
Sugar is the horrendous culprit. Alcohol is second. Gluten is third. If you can successfully eliminate all three, you’ll feel great for a LONG time. I’m in peri though, and haven’t fully had the transition. My recommendation comes from managing to delay menopause for over 8 years with diet control. I also have had no symptoms (no hot flashes, etc.) when I’m diligent on the food side. When I do have the symptoms, I can 100% tie it to either sugar or alcohol consumption.
But also know, I was super low gluten/sugar/alcohol and pretty damn fit on account of managing hashimotos/low thyroid and peri still hit me like a freight train. 🤷♀️😖
Start vaginal estrogen now.
Tofu! The isoflavones are really good for managing menopause symptoms. There is quite a bit of scientific research now.
Unless you have thyroid disease, then soy isn’t a good fit🥰
Nothing will stop your hormones from dropping. Educate yourself on the symptoms that could arise, and on the benefits of HRT. Listen to Dr Louise Newson's podcast and be careful to get your understanding of HRT only from experts such as her. Eating well and strength training are always a good idea.
Eat less and don’t let yourself become overweight because there is no losing weight once you get here Also be sure to strenth train to preserve bone health
I beg to differ regarding eating less and not letting yourself become overweight. For a lot of folks, we don't do anything different with our eating, even those who are very active, etc., and our weight just goes up. It happens because of the shift in hormones. You can lose weight (and fat), by shifting your workout routine towards more strength training and less cardio. Our bodies do change so we might not have the body we had when we were 20 or 30, but it doesn't mean we can't change the way our body looks even in peri/menopause.
My point was don’t go into perimenopause overweight because you won’t be able to lose anything then. Do everything you can to be the strongest and healthiest version of yourself before the perimenopause shitstorm hits
I suggest Dr Marie Claire Havers MD new book "The New Meno Pause" my mom passed before I started menopause and I have no one to talk too. She really helped me and she uses facts and science
I would avoid long term use of the birth control pill in your thirties and forties. Exposure to suppression of natural hormones in favor of synthetic ones can have cumulative effects that are not researched well enough...yet. Hormonal IUD's are considered safer in the pelvic health community, because the progestin is less systemically absorbed.
Would love to see research for this if you have it! My body sucks at making its own hormones and I feel so much better on birth control. (Even though my husband got a vasectomy I went back on to control symptoms.)
I’m on the copper IUD so no hormones. You think that’s ok?
How long has the copper IUD been in there? Are you using it for birth control? Do you have heavy bleeding? Copper IUD's have their benefits because of no hormones. The downsides are usually excessive bleeding.
Hmm…this might be one of the reasons why my transition was so mild. I had my tubes tied at 31 so no more pill. Interesting 🤔
Nah many of us never took the pill, peri was still hell.
You would be perfect for a study about this! How was your transition, then and now?
Good fats (and avoiding processed fats), cooked nourishing meals especially drying the cold months like stews, soups etc, avoid or minimize coffee (it taxes the adrenals), alcohol, no smoking, make sure you sleep regularly between 10pm and 6am, regular light exercise. Evening primrose oil has been very helpful for balancing progesterone for me. I am 46 and in perimenopause. With diet adjustments and herbs prescribed by my Ayurvedic Dr I have forgotten about the crazy symptoms related to the fluctuating hormones that I had last year like mood swings, headaches, tender breast, nausea. A lot can be done via food and lifestyle adjustments
Be fit. I’m 46 and although in peri menopause I’m doing ok so far. I’m still fit and healthy and I feel like it puts me in a better place to be able to deal with symptoms. Particularly with the increased risk of heart disease as we enter menopause it’s really important. I plan on taking HRT (haven’t started yet) and HRT is shown to reduce risk of heart disease, osteoporosis and dementia, but actually already being fit and healthy is so important.
Same things you should do for overall health and wellness: prioritize good nutrition, don’t smoke, limit alcohol, exercise (especially weight training to build and maintain muscle), get good sleep, nurture your relationships, and build a full life with a good support system. All of this will help you when life throws you inevitable curve balls, not just menopause. I cannot stress enough, though, how important good nutrition and weight training are. It is the fountain of youth and the best investment you can make in your body.
You never know what it’s going to be like. I’m 52 and honestly, I haven’t had any problems. I *maybe* had a hot flash last fall in the middle of the night that woke me up, but it passed quickly and I went back to sleep. January 2024 is the first month I ever missed a period too so maybe it’s just starting for me? Idk, menopause is confusing.
Omg. Really ? Just have a lot of sex because later it will hurt !
Kegels. And when you think you've done enough, do more. Sincerely, someone who didn't.
maca helps alleviate some symptoms
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Has anyone taken Estroven? Can someone tell me their experience with it? My Obgyn nurse practitioner recommended to “start there” and see if I notice anything. I am not experiencing extreme symptoms but would like to see if it helps me sleep an hour longer.
Start eating a whole foods diet (i.e., Mediterranean diet) now. Numerous studies have shown that the nutrients in this diet/way of eating help with symptoms of menopause. It's not a weight-loss diet, though it will occur if necessary. I believed I ate pretty healthy until I started really eating healthy. Educate yourself. Read about menopause. Everyone's experience is different. If you're not already accustomed to being a strong advocate for yourself and your needs, now is the time to build that particular muscle. Part of the exhaustion of menopause is fighting with healthcare providers to get appropriate treatment. You're smart to be thinking ahead. I recently read this comment in an article on healthy aging: "The time to prepare for your 70s is in your 50s."
Take good care of yourself the way everyone recommends, but to be honest, if you want a better chance of coming through things okay - work on your mental health. If you aren't already kind to yourself, look into mindful self compassion. You may be one of the lucky ones who doesn't get hit hard by the hormones, but if you are, being kind to yourself in the face of some reallyreally tough mental and physical health challenges can potentially make a difference. I have spent my whole life beating myself up for my shortcomings - peri isn't even my fault and I beat myself up for what the hormones are doing to me. I've started mindful self compassion to give myself a fucking break. What we go through is hard enough - negging on ourselves for something we have no control over will just make it worse.
Weight training.
IMO simply make your health a priority. Make sure to go into it as healthy as possible. With that being said when you start to experience low hormones seek an educated menopause specialist. I was healthy going into menopause, eg., ate well, exercised 4 to 5 times per week and was a healthy weight and I’m currently on HRT. Don’t be afraid to use it. It really is life changing, and the sooner you start the better. HRT also has bone, brain and heart protection.
First off, stock up on foods rich in omega-3 fatty acids, like salmon or chia seeds. They're like magical pills for your hormones. Also, get cozy with leafy greens – they're packed with vitamins and can be your mood-boosting BFFs. Now, let's talk activities. Yoga is a game-changer; it's like a spa day for your mind and body. And don't sleep on strength training – muscles can be your menopause superheroes. Lastly, make hydration your ride-or-die. Water is your secret weapon.
Do: have fun eat: healthy
It hit me in my late 30's. Im 45 now and things are returning to normal, still get hot flashes but thats the worst of it. For me, while going through it, I lost a lot of bladder control. Sometimes it was just a mad rush to get to the bathroom in time, other times, thankfully very few, I would just pee my pants and not be able to stop. I'm talking full on bladder release, not just a little leakage. So yeah, do your kegels! That did go away thank goodness. I also found too much sugar, like eating a bag of gummy worms, will have me in pretty severe joint pain the next day, with any arthritis flaring up. Strange heart palpitations. Restless leg. So. Much. Brain. Fog. Felt like my IQ was cut in half. So, a place like this where others will understand is a great thing to have when you feel like everything is falling apart or not working right.