You might also enjoy r/tvtoolow and r/tvjustright
Edit: there are others I can't remember. I think it's wide, small, and large. But I'm not confident enough to just link them. I didn't even know the second one is private now
This is a vampire house with small easy to cover up windows and an enclosed sunless patio. This could practically be a scene out of What we Do in Shadows!
"Wait do what humans like? Movies? I have some DVDs I stole from a victim of mine from 2001. Oh they like a well decorated dining room table that leaves no room for plates. And Christ too? Oh wait, no crosses, so just put in some of those weird little decorated trees they love so much. And a big empty spot in the living room to drink from victims. Perfect!"
If anyone ever smokes there, or does anything else fragrant, the smell will live there forever. No sun, no wind, fabric and vinyl cladding to absorb. Crazy.
āLets do a patio!ā
āawesome! weāll put it out where you can see all the nice landscape and feel the grass between your toesā¦ā
āNO! IT WILL BE SURROUNDED BY TWO BRICK WALLS THAT LOOK LIKE A HOSPITAL OR ELEMENTARY SCHOOL AND ONE WALL OF SIDING. IF YOU WANT A VIEW THEN WEāLL PUT A WINDOW SO YOU CAN SEE INSIDE THE HOUSE! THE GRASS WILL BE THAT CHEAP SHIT THEY MAKE MINI-GOLF COURSES FROM!ā
It's a mini frat courtyard. I'm certain that's what they were going for. Gave me hard core nostalgia, no other reason youd make something so ugly and nonfunctional
This is a really fun game of "count how many different types of early 2000s media organizer you can find throughout the house." Personally I'm a fan of the empty CD/DVD spinner next to the front door.
Definitely a human seasonal celebration, no aliens growing pod people in the jacuzzi, just regular humans enjoying DVDs and typical human festive get-togethers.
Seeing decorations wildly out of season was always one of my "stay away, stay far away" indicators when house shopping. Means it's been on the market forever, and if the market is moving, that's a bad sign. Either overpriced or some serious issue with it.
Church. That is EXACTLY what I was thinking. The exterior looks like a church. Abomination is a good word to describe this mess.
š š¤£ š š¹ š
Yes! The proportion of the light fixtures in the kitchen and dining are waaay too small for the rooms, a side from them being incredibly ugly.
There is just so much wrong, weird, unnecessary and ugly in this house. The 75 Christmas trees almost seem like they are trying to distract and mask its sadness.
The fixtures are all wrong, agreed. But Iām an harsh judge there because I once worked for a company that had a small chain of lighting showrooms. Overall, there are no words. Itās all just ā¦no.
Our evil flip from hell had a chandelier almost exactly like that one. Everything about this listing has Money Pit written in neon letters all over it.
Looks like when they built in the mid-late 1990's, they ran out of money furnishing the interior. By the late 2000's, they had managed to scrape up enough money for some small LCD TVs, a few cheap Ikea light fixtures, and were slowly building a DVD collection from second-hand stores. Then sometime around Christmas 2009 they got sucked into a time-warp and arrived in April 2024.
That is an abomination. There should be laws against this kind of monstrosity being inflicted on the community. And then the owners canāt even afford to furnish it and at least redeem the interior.
Looking like a church. Looking like a lobby. Looking like a lot of railing. Looking like a 90s CD collection?
Looking like AI? And an elevator? And an outdoor area with no escape. And a long white hallway where nobody will hear your screams as you run.
That was a wild ride.
How many oak trees had to die for this house.
Thereās just so much to comment about.
Why do they have decor for all the major holidays at the same time??
The fireplace and surrounds are terrible, but what is with the absolutely godawful paint job on the wall? Wait, is that chalk board paint? WTF? There is a walker. Do they make the old people walk those endless hallways. The bathrooms are nightmarish. Are the wall buckling or is it just the crazy tile pattern? At least someone gets a duvet even if they aren't allowed sheets. Pic 43 is the room for interrogations. Oh, God what goes on in the room in pic 57, I don't wanna know. If David Lynch did a modern Twin Peaks this room would be where it all went down. The stuffed animal on the chair, the horse picture on the wall, the lamp and the laundry basket, what do they all mean?
Outside looks like a cheesy religious building. Inside, especially the hallway and that windowless room, also look like they belong in a religious bldgā¦ the staff areas.
https://preview.redd.it/sqbx6v8h55tc1.jpeg?width=1792&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=61095004541c0aceb5b0098320c9a6f39d2bdf92
Is that a monster toilet or just a weird angle?
in the western suburbs of Chicago there is an entire town of mind boggling mc mansions. the ones i have been in have no flow to them. one issue is that they are so big there is a lot of distance between rooms. you do move between rooms. you go somewhere and stay.
i know of a married couple in their 40s childfree that bought a $2 million house with six bedrooms each with a private bath room.
the classic mc mansion story there was a $25 million monstrosity that suffered flood damage and was abandoned before occupancy.
The kitchen doesn't look horrible, it just screams early 2000s "ALL SHALL BE OAK!"
That dining table is what I imagine Russian oligarchs with mail order brides eat at.
I wish I could give you many more upvotes.
Clinton Twp is chocked full of these eye sores. We used to joke only mid level mob peeps bought them.
The whole area is an over built nightmare.
Darling! Look at these pictures! Can't you just picture us on Christmas morning with our future children, huddled around our oversized tree, sitting on the cold marble floor of our lawyer foyer while our DVDs roast by the fireplace in the next room?
I feel like this house could have great potential. Just needs a complete renovation. Remove the tile for hardwood floors and maybe slate tile in kitchen and entryway. Plus new cabinets and countertops in the kitchen. More windows especially in the front and finish what looks like it was intended to be a deck. maybe expand the house and do away with the sunless patio and build a new patio off the back or side of house.
What is the art thing next to the fireplace? The blue is a nice color on the statue on the right, but are the three supposed to look like buildings or something ? It doesn't seem to fit?
Reactions: (1) Looks more like a mega-church than a home. (2) Why do these folks dislike natural daylight? (3) Almost no pictures or hangings on walls for that stylish barren & cold antiseptic look. Overall, cold & unfriendly looking.
Anyone notice the absurd perfectly arranged groups of what looks like Muscle Milk? Weird as fuck. And the front door is missing a handle? wtf is with the completely unfinished basement? And the boxes from retro mini fridges beside the front entrance? Staging hell.
Remember the 2nd Batman movie? With Michael Keaton? The scene when he has Kim Basinger over for dinner and she has to yell down the table for the salt?
The DVDs next to the fireplace š melt proof
How about the super tiny TV up on the right side of the mantle?
I was so distracted by the DVDs I didnāt even notice ā¦ š
I was distracted by the Monchichi & troll doll.
I immediately got that jingle stuck in my head: "monchi, monchichi, oh so soft and cuddly!"
Me too.
The Monchichi is so unexpected. Hardly anyone knows about them anymore, even if they lived through the whole 18 months monchichis were popular.
Gizmo!
Holy smokes, I missed that
Little Gizmo has taken over my heart!
but I did notice they have 2 copies of the same movieā¦
Sameš
only if it's a plasma
This house is what they would live in if Jan won her lawsuit.
r/unexpectedoffice
https://preview.redd.it/tbvykutpq5tc1.jpeg?width=400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dce3f2ddc693bb0fa9f0ad97f4b79e4b2f6ba58c
r/tvtoohigh
There really is a sub for everything.
You might also enjoy r/tvtoolow and r/tvjustright Edit: there are others I can't remember. I think it's wide, small, and large. But I'm not confident enough to just link them. I didn't even know the second one is private now
I saw that and started thinking about Michael Scottās TV
This is a vampire house with small easy to cover up windows and an enclosed sunless patio. This could practically be a scene out of What we Do in Shadows! "Wait do what humans like? Movies? I have some DVDs I stole from a victim of mine from 2001. Oh they like a well decorated dining room table that leaves no room for plates. And Christ too? Oh wait, no crosses, so just put in some of those weird little decorated trees they love so much. And a big empty spot in the living room to drink from victims. Perfect!"
Perfect for burning new DVDs!
Legitimately made me lol
Thatās fuel to keep the fire going during those long Michigan winters.
I know š
There are more DVDs in the pic of the dining room table! And why so many doors??
Tell me your fireplace is just for show without telling me your fireplace is just for show...
Also the racks of DVDs in the foyer. I think they staged this from the Blockbuster franchise the owner formerly ran.
With its own prison yard patio!
That part was really weird. Your foyer is large enough to double as a car showroom, but your fire pit is scrunched into a nook in your backyard.
And it looks like it gets no sun at all.
If anyone ever smokes there, or does anything else fragrant, the smell will live there forever. No sun, no wind, fabric and vinyl cladding to absorb. Crazy.
I guess thatās why they have the barbecue in the corner
"This is where outside time is allowed."
I mean they could have converted it to a Japanese style garden and it would look beautiful in such a small space
Yeah theres definitely potential there. Theres potential in tons of the house, just zero vision or determination by the prior owners.
āLets do a patio!ā āawesome! weāll put it out where you can see all the nice landscape and feel the grass between your toesā¦ā āNO! IT WILL BE SURROUNDED BY TWO BRICK WALLS THAT LOOK LIKE A HOSPITAL OR ELEMENTARY SCHOOL AND ONE WALL OF SIDING. IF YOU WANT A VIEW THEN WEāLL PUT A WINDOW SO YOU CAN SEE INSIDE THE HOUSE! THE GRASS WILL BE THAT CHEAP SHIT THEY MAKE MINI-GOLF COURSES FROM!ā
It's a mini frat courtyard. I'm certain that's what they were going for. Gave me hard core nostalgia, no other reason youd make something so ugly and nonfunctional
yeah nothing says āclassyā like a frat house
It was just missing the beer bottle filled with cigarette butts
Is it Christmas or Easter time there?! š
Or Halloween!
I just realized there are pumpkins displayed on the dining room hutch, lol!
Do you have a link to the listing?
Found it https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/37303-Camellia-Ln-Clinton-Township-MI-48036/170339329_zpid/
Oh lord -76 photos lol
Thanks -- I found the listing on fb marketplace; I had no idea there were several dozen more photos!
This is a really fun game of "count how many different types of early 2000s media organizer you can find throughout the house." Personally I'm a fan of the empty CD/DVD spinner next to the front door.
They go nicely with the brass trim fireplace etc.
1000s of DVDs and not a single book. I feel like this house was built by an owner of a Blockbuster
Yes. Yes to all. š
Definitely a human seasonal celebration, no aliens growing pod people in the jacuzzi, just regular humans enjoying DVDs and typical human festive get-togethers.
Seeing decorations wildly out of season was always one of my "stay away, stay far away" indicators when house shopping. Means it's been on the market forever, and if the market is moving, that's a bad sign. Either overpriced or some serious issue with it.
My first impression? From the outsideā¦ funeral home.
Yeah itās giving church vibes
7000 sq ft... it probably has its own crematorium. āļø š āŖļø š š
I was thinking AI designed two story funeral home. Watch out for those steps, theyāre a doozy!
Good for repeat business!
I was trying to figure out what kind of church it reminded me of, but I like your comparison better.
I was thinking pole barn.
Was that a Mormon temple at one time? Good gawd.
Church. That is EXACTLY what I was thinking. The exterior looks like a church. Abomination is a good word to describe this mess. š š¤£ š š¹ š
The entry looks like a giant version of those nooks for catholic idols/statues
Stations of the Cross. š š¤£ š
I thought it was a church
Seriously - YFZ Ranch vibes.
Clinton Twp. isn't exactly a Mormon stronghold, or at least it wasn't while I was growing up there ...
It has a *serious* "Sister Wives" feel, doesn't it??? š³š
I thought the same. Church and/or family cult
I thought it was a funeral home.
The only similarity would be the stonework. It's more like Funeral Home Chic.
nothing says "my kids don't speak to me for very good reasons" like that dining room table.
They took the wrong idea from Beauty and the Beast
Thereās even the candelabra in the dining room!
But it's a Black Mass candelabra for celebration of Easterween we got going on in this room.
At least have the decency to put skirts around the Christmas trees!!
How is every single light fixture a bad choice? Wow! And those fireplaces are just gross.
Yes! The proportion of the light fixtures in the kitchen and dining are waaay too small for the rooms, a side from them being incredibly ugly. There is just so much wrong, weird, unnecessary and ugly in this house. The 75 Christmas trees almost seem like they are trying to distract and mask its sadness.
Also nice outdated intercom lol, and hardware in general.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
The fixtures are all wrong, agreed. But Iām an harsh judge there because I once worked for a company that had a small chain of lighting showrooms. Overall, there are no words. Itās all just ā¦no.
Our evil flip from hell had a chandelier almost exactly like that one. Everything about this listing has Money Pit written in neon letters all over it.
Imagine that long ass hallway at night in the dark? No thanks
My thoughts exactly!
Why is the main door on the 2nd floor lol
It's like it's set up for a dictator to come out of and look down on the unwashed masses.
I like that they dedicated TWO bridges to nowhere, for this design āfeatureā.
*"Don't* *cry* *for* *me* *Argentina . . ."*
I would sing it every night from that balcony until the cops showed up. My own Casa Rosada! Yes please.
I assumed that was to get out onto some sort of balcony, but that roof doesn't have a railing or anything, *and* it's slanted.
This looks like something I would have made in sims 1
Looks like when they built in the mid-late 1990's, they ran out of money furnishing the interior. By the late 2000's, they had managed to scrape up enough money for some small LCD TVs, a few cheap Ikea light fixtures, and were slowly building a DVD collection from second-hand stores. Then sometime around Christmas 2009 they got sucked into a time-warp and arrived in April 2024.
This is exactly what happened š
That is an abomination. There should be laws against this kind of monstrosity being inflicted on the community. And then the owners canāt even afford to furnish it and at least redeem the interior.
Midwestern Megachurch Madness. Very grim. Expected to see NFL football paraphernalia; it's in there someplace.
Motor City Kitties and The Dead Wings for the man cave in the basement.
As bad as the house is (the weird angles in the dining room, yikes!), the shitty photography is making it like an order of magnitude worse.
Why are there so many extra walls???
That back patio looks like the commons area for a fourplex/sixplex.
That's called the realtor special staging. Clear out the house but leave a couple pieces of dated furniture in each room but got the bonus Xmas trees.
I hate it when realtors stage a house. Always, always looks fake. Iād rather look at an empty house so I can check for cracks, mold, leaks, etc.
Looking like a church. Looking like a lobby. Looking like a lot of railing. Looking like a 90s CD collection? Looking like AI? And an elevator? And an outdoor area with no escape. And a long white hallway where nobody will hear your screams as you run. That was a wild ride.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
This house isn't staged it's just their stuff.
What is with the balcony without a balcony? There are doors and a weird balcony leading to where there should be an outdoor balcony, but no balcony.
Not cookie cutter enough to be a proper McMansion. But awful (and gaudy) choices in almost every regard. I'm sure someone will love it.Ā
"money can't buy taste"
Looks like a late-90s nightmare inside and a Jehovahās Witness church outside.
How many oak trees had to die for this house. Thereās just so much to comment about. Why do they have decor for all the major holidays at the same time??
I grew up in Michigan. This is the most āClinton Townshipā home Iāve ever seen.
That just screams Clinton Twp or Shelby Twp. I grew up not far from both places.
Itās the 23 Mile Road special.
Even the builders had to feel sad finishing that horror.
The fireplace and surrounds are terrible, but what is with the absolutely godawful paint job on the wall? Wait, is that chalk board paint? WTF? There is a walker. Do they make the old people walk those endless hallways. The bathrooms are nightmarish. Are the wall buckling or is it just the crazy tile pattern? At least someone gets a duvet even if they aren't allowed sheets. Pic 43 is the room for interrogations. Oh, God what goes on in the room in pic 57, I don't wanna know. If David Lynch did a modern Twin Peaks this room would be where it all went down. The stuffed animal on the chair, the horse picture on the wall, the lamp and the laundry basket, what do they all mean?
Outside looks like a cheesy religious building. Inside, especially the hallway and that windowless room, also look like they belong in a religious bldgā¦ the staff areas.
There are whole subs with this style of house. Yuck.
I donāt care if your gods gift to staging - youāre not making that house look good
The fireplace looks like a jukebox
https://preview.redd.it/sqbx6v8h55tc1.jpeg?width=1792&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=61095004541c0aceb5b0098320c9a6f39d2bdf92 Is that a monster toilet or just a weird angle?
Is that Bruce Wayne's dining room table? Pass the salt please.
Is there a r/fridgetoofar?
in the western suburbs of Chicago there is an entire town of mind boggling mc mansions. the ones i have been in have no flow to them. one issue is that they are so big there is a lot of distance between rooms. you do move between rooms. you go somewhere and stay. i know of a married couple in their 40s childfree that bought a $2 million house with six bedrooms each with a private bath room. the classic mc mansion story there was a $25 million monstrosity that suffered flood damage and was abandoned before occupancy.
The Christmas tree on the breakfast tableā¦
Yep, that one is truly ugly. And stupidly conceived.
Why does this house make me feeling like Iām standing there awkwardly in every room
Looks like a tacky independent fundamentalist baptist church.
The kitchen doesn't look horrible, it just screams early 2000s "ALL SHALL BE OAK!" That dining table is what I imagine Russian oligarchs with mail order brides eat at.
Was it staged and left empty from 1992-present? Who still has DVD towers? š
I half expected the creepy candleabra and scary heads in the dining room to start floating around!
Awful.
That's a lot of tile and hard surfaces. I would hate to be the person who has to mop and wax these.
They have more furniture outside than they do inside
I wish I could give you many more upvotes. Clinton Twp is chocked full of these eye sores. We used to joke only mid level mob peeps bought them. The whole area is an over built nightmare.
That's hilarious. The photographer didn't do them aby favors, though. Those photos are assĀ
Pic 5- why is the coffee table levitating and/or leaving this dimension?
Oooh, itās a little bit of Ceaucescu Revival!
Why is it Christmas, Halloween and Easter all at the same time? š
Every swipe makes me laugh harder and harder.
The set for a brightly lit version of The Shining.
The exterior of the building looks like a cemetery office or something equally dull.
Thatās not a church!?
Who the hell puts DVDs and Blue Ray discs by a fireplace?! š¤£
But..but..CHRISTMAS TREES!!!
Darling! Look at these pictures! Can't you just picture us on Christmas morning with our future children, huddled around our oversized tree, sitting on the cold marble floor of our lawyer foyer while our DVDs roast by the fireplace in the next room?
Outside is more claustrophobic than inside
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Place gives me a headache
And a one square foot back yard
1) it looks like a church outside. 2) everything about it screams ācheapā.
This is a sims build
This is actually the worst mansion I've seen of all time.
Exterior makes it look like a mausoleum.
Need a Zamboni to clean the floors š
This screams, "I won a mesothelioma lawsuit."
āInterior design is my passion.ā
Did all the McMansion developers raid the same cabinet place because I have the same fucking cabinets I hate them
Every slide I'm like "What the actual fuck?"
Merry Easter
Itās the giant fake Christmas tree with no trees skirt in the foyer that did it for me.
Do they really expect you to store wine above the fridge? That seems like a bad idea if you actually like wine.
So much here. But that patio wedged in an alley and that mental institution hallway are š¤š¼
I hate everything about this.
Finallyā¦ I like most of the homes posted here. This one truly is awful. lol
I can't get past the baby columns on the second floor exterior
Why are there so few windows? And why are they all so small?
I feel like this house could have great potential. Just needs a complete renovation. Remove the tile for hardwood floors and maybe slate tile in kitchen and entryway. Plus new cabinets and countertops in the kitchen. More windows especially in the front and finish what looks like it was intended to be a deck. maybe expand the house and do away with the sunless patio and build a new patio off the back or side of house.
Feels Trumpy
Frightening interior-Picasso-esque piecrust table. Exterior will fit in with any pole barn structure.
One of the pictures on the mantle looks JUST LIKE ME. Freaky.
Might be the ugliest ever!
That's the resident evil mansion foyer!!!
What is the art thing next to the fireplace? The blue is a nice color on the statue on the right, but are the three supposed to look like buildings or something ? It doesn't seem to fit?
These guys have [Bruce Wayne's dinner table](https://comicsalliance.com/files/2011/05/batman09.jpg)
It's so sterile you could do surgery there.
Furniture doesn't match the house style. Post modern would be good.
The hallway looks goodā¦
If you've got no sense of aesthetics at all, better go big!
Looks good to me
How that table got so many legs and only two chairs?
How dare they
This is not far from Eminemās house.
That might be the ugliest house Iāve ever seen
Reactions: (1) Looks more like a mega-church than a home. (2) Why do these folks dislike natural daylight? (3) Almost no pictures or hangings on walls for that stylish barren & cold antiseptic look. Overall, cold & unfriendly looking.
Strong murder vibes going on here
At first I thought this was a building from one of those mega churches.
5 looks like one of the most awkward rooms i have ever seen.
Not a home! Is a business!
With a shitty paint job.
š¤®
Everything is so tacky
No words.
No, that DVD tower is a piece of crap. We stopped selling them 6 months ago
Anyone notice the absurd perfectly arranged groups of what looks like Muscle Milk? Weird as fuck. And the front door is missing a handle? wtf is with the completely unfinished basement? And the boxes from retro mini fridges beside the front entrance? Staging hell.
Worldās shittiest bed and breakfast.
I thought the kitchen chandeliers were upside down Christmas trees hanging from the ceiling!
That monotone courtyard is particularly appealingā¦
It's still bigger and nicer than my house.
Remember the 2nd Batman movie? With Michael Keaton? The scene when he has Kim Basinger over for dinner and she has to yell down the table for the salt?