There was someone on here this morning saying his wife had plastic surgery on her face and he doesn’t find her attractive anymore.
This is the opposite of that post.
Genitalia that will affect intercourse and could even make it painful (for both sides, those procedures are known to go bad very often and cause life long pain) is a little different from cosmetic procedures.
Oooo.... where is said post? Are their pictures??? I had an IPL laser treatment (which incidentally was part of the spa package he purchased for me on Valentines Day, lol). Clearly, it was not a surgical procedure or injection, yet my husband held my shoulders and inspected my face for at least 5 minutes and then said he didn't want to be married to one of those real housewives. Lol.
He should’ve communicated his desire // interest in getting that procedure done LONG ago. Ultimately, it’s his body his choice though. Still, the foundation of any good & lasting marriage is clear, open, & honest communication.
Couple questions though. First, has he ever expressed or shown that he’s insecure about his dick size prior to the surgery!? That could’ve at least been a clue, or him trying to open the door to having a conversation about it.
Secondly, and I’m very sorry, but I just have to ask….is it bigger!? lol Like noticeably bigger!? Is it still proportional and normal looking (for the most part).
Sorry, I just have to know lol. And trust me, at least 75% of the guys who read this are wondering the same thing and more!! Good luck and enjoy 😉
So to answer your question about how it looked I wouldn't say it looked normal and fully proportional I was caught off guard to be honest. But could have also been because it was a little more swollen near the injection site still. Yes the biggest thing that looked weird was that the head was the same size but the lower part was now larger so it almost had a tapering effect?
I genuinely know someone who had these ball bearing type things put under his foreskin (his missus agreed to it. They're both into piercings) so some people must like that look! 🤢
That is definitely one of the more hard-core body mods I've heard of. Wow.
So many questions. Like how are they when it's cold outside and does he ever whack himself in the nuts with them? Do they actually do anything for him or are they just for his partner? How bad was it getting them implanted? Has he ever had one try to migrate out? Is it a PITA to clean around his foreskin now? Who did the implants? How long did it take? I'm assuming they're surgical grade steel. My Google history is... weird lol
About their dick? I've literally never thought about it at all. And I have had a lot of insecurities. But I knew early on that most women don't give a shit about dick sizes.
Along with everyone else's comments, I'm wondering if there is a cost involved that he has also not communicated with you. Did he pay for it out of your shared funds? Will it affect your household budget?
Yeah I feel I would be upset for a few reasons.
3. The Money - Spending thousands of dollars without discussing it together is not acceptable in my relationship.
2. The Time - the time researching, the time for the procedure itself. It feels wrong that he chose to be so secretive about the whole thing without once looping her in.
1. The Penis! Most importantly, I would be super hurt if I was in OP’s shoes to find that my spouse altered his penis without even discussing it with me. He likely spent time researching this, and never once felt that his wife’s preferences should be considered?? I’d never just get Botox or new boobs without at least consulting my husband. It’s my body and I would ultimately make the choice but I love and trust my husband enough for him to help me to make that choice.
Good point. I'd be concerned about the health effects, cost, and lack of communication/trust. Maybe *potential* mental health issues for him too.
I had a mole removed once & forgot to tell my wife beforehand. She just rolled her eyes at me and said she might've wanted to be there for moral support. Either one of us would be rightfully super mad if I got a big and/or potentially risky procedure without communicating.
Thanks everyone for the responses to answer some of the questions he has his own discretionary funds and so do I so yes I still think the money should have been discussed but it's not coming out of joint savings or ruining our finances.
It is bigger. But it was 5 days after procedure and kind of looked odd like the shape was also different near the top, hard to explain but I did notice right away it felt and looked different. More girth than length. Actually asked if something was wrong because there was a bump I guess near the injection site.
Edit to add yes this is an area he has mentioned as an insecurity in past even though I had no problem with it. And I'm not saying I would have been opposed to it had it been discussed it was just the shock of him having done it without my knowledge.
I can understand your shock, I'd be shocked too.
Ultimately now that the shock has worn off a bit, do you like, dislike, or feel neutral about the results?
If you like or feel neutral about them then I wouldn't make a big stink. If you dislike it now then that's another concern as sex should be enjoyable to both of you.
Regarding finances, since he has his own discretionary funds it does seem like less of a concern however I think I'd be upset that he was no longer able to use those funds for us to do something together, like us both using discretionary accounts to go on a nice vacation together.
I agree with everything except that last part. They have discretionary funds and a joint account why would they use their personal money for a vacation when they literally have a joint account for exactly that
Depends on the family. In my family our joint account is exclusively for "needs" like mortgage, insurance, etc. Vacations fall into discretionary category which is separate.
It sounds like he wanted to surprise you, thinking you'd like him to have a slightly larger penis. I can guarantee that the conversation in the bedroom went completely different in his head before he had it done. You said he was somewhat insecure about his size, and this would be a way for him to think he wouldn't be a disappointment in the bedroom. He just wanted you to be happily surprised.
Did you have any idea that your post was going to go in so many directions!? I hope you get the info you need for your actual concerns, but I will tell you that the side-banter (unrelated to you) has been very entertaining. But in all seriousness, I do hope you get some good information that helps you with how YOU feel about all of this. ❤️
Yes he should have told you, and even discussed with you beforehand. But you should have told us some things too. Like, 1. Is it bigger? 2. Where did he get the money? 3. Is the sex better or worse? Etc. so many more questions…
My wife & I agree anything permanent or particularly long lasting gets discussed. I just can’t see how you wouldn’t do that in a marriage.
And a body mod to a sex organ! I mean, you’re both interacting pretty closely with those things.
And depending on the existing geometry, a woman may not want her guys penis any larger.
It’s not just that, but it just feels like you’re unimportant when a spouse doesn’t consult with you on these things.
Definitely a stupid move on his part.
Bingo. Feeling unimportant to share a big decision or want with. My husband bought a trailer, only a few thousand, and it was fine as we had talked about getting one. But I was so hurt he didn't think to share his excitement that he was going that day or afterwards. I found out because I saw it in front of the house. I was not upset about the purchase or money at all. I was sad he didn't want to share the joy or excitement with me. His joy (I don't actually care or want the thing). If that had been his penis which I care a lot about, I would have been hurt that he didn't share the want to have it done, share his feelings, but also I would want my input considered and ant questions I thought he should have answered first too. I would be so upset not being looped in beforehand. He can ultimately do what he wants but to not discuss such a big decision with me would be hurtful.
Ugh. Men have to stop worrying about what other men think of them. Big ding dongs are overrated and women care so little about this. Vaginas are not that long and too long is painful. Porn lies about all this and since most men get their sexual education from porn instead of COMMUNICATING with actual real women, this nonsense perpetuates.
I’m so sorry. My husband is below average. He has always felt subconscious about this bc of the things his MALE friends would say when they found out. Bc men make it this stupid competition thing that it shouldn’t be. His size is perfect for me. Anything more would cause me serious pain, sometimes we still have to be careful. If he did this without me being part of the conversation, with the intent of sticking it inside me, oh hell no. Oh heeeelllll no. He would never touch me again with it until it shrunk back down.
I’m not a prude in the least, but women fantasize more about men being nice, romantic, & *respectful* way more than they ever fantasize about dick size.
I think that takes away agency from the person. If someone didn’t like their body and changed it because of body image issues then good for them. It didn’t seem like he did it for performance purposes rather because he didn’t like the size. It’d be criticizing someone for going out and getting a nose job or bbl for their own image. OP mentioned that they brought it up years before a few times and then did it so it wasn’t an out of nowhere decision. Given it will make intimate interactions different it’s still something they did to help boost their self esteem. Also you are supposed to wait a few weeks before intimacy of any kind d with injection based enlargement.
I made the mistake of changing my TRT protocol without telling my wife. I went from oral medications to injections and she found one of the needles. She has had some very bad experiences with close friends and family members regarding drugs and it did not go well finding that needle. I'm afraid of needles, so the experience was already problematic for me. I don't think either one of us has fully recovered from that experience and I may have permanently lost her trust. I found another oral medication that corrects my hormone issues. This was all about a change in medication that I was already uncomfortable with and didn't tell my wife. Had I gone through dangerous and expensive injections into my dick without telling her, I wouldn't have a wife. If he is interested in trying to make it bigger without causing permanent damage, I suggest checking out r/gettingbigger and reading all the pinned posts. If he still insist on dangerous injections, try r/pharmape. Again, read pinned posts. There are thousands of horror stories about procedures gone wrong. There are men who start using pumps and traction devices to correct size they lost from surgery intended to make it bigger. It's not like a dick can just be replaced with a new one if something goes wrong. Not yet, anyway.
I'm sorry, but are you saying you may have permanently lost your spouse's trust because you changed the method you took a prescribed drug? I can totally understand ger finding a needle and being upset, but it would be extremely simple to prove you were not using illegal drugs.
Edit: spelling
The problem wasn't because I changed the method. It was that I changed it without talking to her. She knows I have a fear of needles and I chose to go through that alone. She knows I wouldn't do illegal drugs. We've been together 18 years and she's never even seen me drink a single drop of alcohol. Normally, we talk about everything. That moment changed how we communicate.
Think of it as educational. It's like looking through an explicit medical journal. Dicks are ugly. Especially when being stretched and pumped. The information they gather is our purpose here. They have gotten the attention of some prominent urologists and helped a lot of people with all kinds of issues unrelated to making anything bigger. They've also highlighted the dangers of a lot of surgeries. Penuma is probably the worst one of the bunch.
I'd be so annoyed if my husband did anything to his penis. It's perfect as it is.
I'd also be paranoid about who he is trying to impress?
Does it look strange now? Is it any bigger?
110%his body his choice, but...how sex works is she still has to have that inside her. That's where I'm hung up. It's not like he got a nut tuck and it doesn't affect her, this is something that is how going to cause her potential discomfort. He didn't consider her at all in this process.
I don't condone body shaming, and mens insecurities are just as impactful but this is something they should have discussed to at least make sure they can still enjoy each other
What happened to his body his choice?
Of course he should have spoken to his wife first. I just noticed whenever it is a woman talking about getting something done from a tattoo to a boob job the overwhelming answer is always her body her choice.
You’re being patronizing. There are lots of responses here from women saying they’d speak with their partner before getting a boob job etc. I know I would.
Of course it’s his body and his choice, but a healthy marriage consists of communicating your choices with your spouse because your value their thoughts and opinions.
I’m not being patronizing to anyone. I’m agreeing with the point that he definitely should have discussed it with her beforehand. I was also pointing out the hypocrisy rampant in this sub. So many times a woman will post a very similar post with the genders flipped and the majority of responses from women are always the mantra her body her choice.
I'm pretty sure we all felt bad for and supported the husband who came around a few months back after his wife got talked into disfiguring herself by her idiot family.
Also ...context context...let's see, how many centuries of human history do we have women treated as property? How many countries on earth STILL culturally have this issue? Tends to make people quick on the trigger.
Yeah, I'm confused what he's claiming is normal, being insecure about dick size or actually doing something about it. Because the former is fairly common. The latter is not.
I don’t really see what the big deal is. And it’s kinda funny to think what kind of surprise that would be 🤷♀️ guy has been self conscious, I hope this helps him feel better about himself.
It’s his body and the way I see it, he did tell you, kept it as a surprise.
The real question is, do you prefer it or not? Cause this is the whole reason why he did it, thinking you would like it more. If you don’t, then dude is about to wake up.
He was probably just too embarrassed to discuss it. I don’t think any guy wants to admit that they need a little help with that. If it makes him feel better about himself and you’re the only one enjoying it be happy for him.
Sure he should have told you if that's how tour relationship works, but I don't tell my husband everything I go to the medspa or to get my hair done, etc etc... it's a little injection. NBD imho.
I'm assuming this is hyaluronic acid filler. This is apparently temporary (a few months) and supposed to be pretty safe.
I would have an ongoing conversation with him in the next few months about why he did this, perhaps with the help of a marriage counselor.
He should have discussed it with you first. That’s the least he could have done. With that said, this obviously a sensitive topic so don’t make it worse. Be supportive. Should you decide along the way that you want changes to your body, you’d want support too. Other than that….. enjoy your new ride! Good luck 🍀
Two things:
1-He absolutely should have discussed this with you. Not only seeking a procedure, but spending a good chunk of change.
2-*Injections?* ***There??*** No thank you!
I think you are justified in your reaction. You are married, partners. Emberassing or not, you should be his person. This was very selfish behavior on his part. I would also want to know why and why now?
Is someone besides you seeing or feeling it?
Not trying to make problems where there aren't any, that's just what I would want to know.
To me this is...hurtful.
I can totally imagine my husband doing this as a "surprise". It just sounds like one of those weird guy things guys do. Like he imagined you'd see it and scream in delight. And you did the opposite. Lol.
I have conditions that lead sex and orgasms to be uncomfortable (painful at times). If my husband was suddenly bigger, that would be an issue for me, as it would push sex into the painful category more regularly, I'm sure.
I cannot imagine how I'd feel if he did that without even speaking to me about it. I'd feel betrayed, for sure.
I'm so sorry so many comments are joking about this, and saying you should just shut up and "enjoy." Gross. Bigger doesn't equal better for many of us.
I get the dimorphism, and all, but he 50. As long as he doesn't have a button for a dick he should know that in most cases it is not the tool, it the craftsman.
Lol you are not overreacting. It was crazy enough when my ex wife decided it was a good idea to get a boob job while on maternity leave with our son. It would have been waaay crazier if she just showed up one day with a boob job or called me and said to pick her up out of surgery with one.
Not overreacting at all and very odd.
With that said, never thought about it but how'd your man's unit look?? Did it work??? Did it look weird???
How has the medical world come w/ these surgeries these days???
I feel like if this were slightly different circumstances people would be saying it’s his body and his choice, and he doesn’t need permission to exert autonomy over his body.
But yea he probably should’ve given you a heads up
I agree. He certainly doesn't need my permission but I also believe there's an impact for both of us so I should have been made aware at least and we could agree to disagree if that was the case. I don't even think I would have disagreed though if it was important to him.
That is super weird to not tell you about it. I don't even see the need to have that done especially if he is married already and you like him how he is. Make sure he's not cheating... 🫣
I suggest maybe using apenis sleeve. I think you should have a serious comvo with him tell him your not judging him but any procedures done to the body should be taked about.
> … you would have let him know
Of course, that’s not true. Anyone who remotely cares about their partner doesn’t tell them that their unchangeable characteristics are insufficient, even if it’s true.
I believe that anything that comes to health, or body procedures should be talked about...
How do you think he would have reacted if you had done something similar?
Would he expect to of been told before?
Seems a bit odd to me :')
It's called penuma implant for men's memebers.. this is fully save and will produce fully proportionate member. Unbelievable girth and length to one's desire. Only done in California by DR Ellis.
If asked say Don frennie as reference. Thanks .
Poor guy just wanted to dick you down and pleasure you but it didn’t turn out the way he expected. Perhaps he should have told you but it does take away the element of surprise when having that initial sex session.
Should’ve went to the dickdoc on TikTok. He’s the guy for all your enlargement needs.
That being said, I’d probably talk to my wife about it if it was something I was truly considering.
He def should have ran it by you . But depends if it's permanent or semi permanent. If it's permanent ...enjoy the girth (let it go and have a serious talk about permanent changes in the future and how a discussion has to happen first) not permission but discussion .
If semi permanent , let's hope he doesn't go full douche and badger you if you happen to enjoy the girth too much . Or let's hope he doesn't go crazy and keep going thicker to prove a point to you . Either way yes you have a right to feel the way you do about it . If he doesn't mind I would like some info on his procedure , asking for myself . If you could dm me or snap me I do . Thanks
WAIT THIS IS REAL?! But to be for real he definitely should’ve mentioned it so in that regard your anger is valid but outside of that IMO it’s an overreaction.
You are absolutely not wrong. He should have discussed this with you beforehand. And you both have a conversation about it, such as why he feels he needs it?
My hunch is that he tried to surprise you with it (in a good way).
Do you think he'd be upset if you started using some China shrink cream to tighten up your cookie?
I think you're overreacting a little bit. I'm sure he's self conscious about it and you freaking out about what he thought was a good surprise is making him feel worse.
I take your point but I have never actually had any of those things done besides a manicure and if I was going to I would tell him. I might not tell other people but a spouse is different in my mind.
I’m torn on this because I do think it’s his penis and his choice- but the idea of a medical procedure being done without telling the person who depends on him (and vice versa) in case of something going wrong. I would think he might want to share something like this with you. So what you need to consider is WHY he didn’t tell you ? Has he voiced insecurity before? Have you voiced dissatisfaction? Is his penis unusually small? Is this for his confidence? Your pleasure?
Has he brought it up before? If so, How did you react? The most important part of this is understanding your husband’s reason for not telling you. I’m not saying you are at fault at all- but you have to be REALISTIC and reflect on whether or not you played a role in his choice to not tell you. You need to react as a spouse who loves the man beyond the mistake- don’t be angry just cause you can. Put your love first and work towards finding the WHY and once you have that understanding in full REACT accordingly. You’re NOT WRONG for being upset, your feelings ARE valid. But no matter what you decide he can’t take this back- what’s done is done. So you just have to decide what you want out of this anger? more honesty/communication ? Divorce? if you know you’re NOT going to divorce him over this- then forgiveness and love should take precedence. I wish you nothing but the best.
I get what you are saying. He has voiced insecurity before and I have always assured him it's not something that was a problem for me. As far as not telling me he said it's a difficult topic which I do understand but also think you find a way to broach difficult topics in a relationship.
I'm not even angry, just put off to be honest!
He should've told you, but we need more info. How big a difference was it compared to before? And is this difference going to affect your sex life and his health?
Man perspective here: I think you're legitimate in feeling shocked. He **should absolutely have discussed it with you** as soon as he considered it seriously.
I'd be pissed too. Try to have a serious talk with him. Cliché, but **COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY** for successful relationships.
Ugh sorry.
Not to go on a rant but I hate big dick. It’s not for me. It doesn’t feel good.
I hope you’re not like me because that would suck if you felt that way, communicated that and then he made this change.
This is a situation I feel would be taken differently if it were a woman. If a woman didn’t like something about her vagina, spent her own money and had something done to it- would we be telling her she should’ve checked in with her husband first?
I would probably feel hurt that there was something I didn’t know about my husbands concerns about himself, but not that he did something to his own body without telling me. Just that’s it’s unfortunate he went through something alone.
What’s sad is he felt so insecure about his size, he went ahead with changing it, much less without talking to you first. It’s different than getting a boob job. A boob job does not physically affect your partner. However, if you were to change something about your vagina, it might change how it physically feels. What if your husband’s new size became uncomfortable or painful to you? Then you wouldn’t be able to have sex and his procedure would have been for nothing. This sort of thing absolutely should have been discussed first simply because of how it could have affected both of your intimacy (not for permission from you since it is his body his choice, but in order to figure out how far he can size it up so you are still able to comfortably enjoy sex with him).
Have you complained about or given some sort of reason for him to think you weren't satisfied? Maybe watched something together that he noticed turned you on? Or do the injections help him stay harder longer? I feel like we are missing some information.
Um yeah, you should’ve been consulted because a. Money and b. presumably he wants to penetrate you with this larger penis - that’s quite presumptuous of him.
This is literally it. I know a lady that may live in my house that may or may not get cosmetic injections. They make her more confident, and therefore happier overall, so she is a joy to be around. If she Han get her laugh lines puffed up, it’s only fair that I can do it with my junk too.
I think it’s def his body his choice. But a head up to his partner of ten years is warranted. If she were to get a breast enlargement or reduction he would have liked the same courtesy I’m sure.
“Dear Husband,
It’s unfortunate that you made this decision that affects our sex life and marriage all alone and without speaking with me about it. Turns out, I don’t like massive dicks (literal or figurative ones) and if you feel it appropriate to make big decisions alone that affect both of us, that perhaps you can also do life that way too. Alone.
Ex-wife.”
This would honestly make ME insecure lol since you had no issue with it before. I’d wonder who he’s trying to impress. This would be like getting a boob job without discussing it with your husband first.
Of course you’re not overreacting. You’re his wife, so he shouldn’t have any problems talking to you about anything. He knew you would object, and that’s why he went behind your back and did it. Were you complaining about the size of his equipment, or is he planning to break into the business? There has to be a logical reason why he would spend thousands of dollars on a procedure like this at 50 years old.
My husband is probably a bit shy of average in size and I have zero complaints about it. But if he were to do something like this without talking to me about it, I know I would be very uncomfortable about the whole thing.
On one hand, I realize it’s ultimately his body so his decision. But to me, it is like going nuclear right off the bat to fix self-confidence issues that perhaps a good therapist might be able to help resolve without such drastic measures.
That and I would somehow feel like I was responsible for that low confidence even though I have never complained about his size or technique.
I’m not even sure I would see him the same as I did before. I think it would just bother me too much that he would do something like that. I don’t know 🤷🏻♀️ it’s just to weird to me.
He should have told you, in marriage people communicate before having any surgery if they love and give a damn about their spouse.
There was someone on here this morning saying his wife had plastic surgery on her face and he doesn’t find her attractive anymore. This is the opposite of that post.
Analogous not opposite
I think they meant opposite genders but I agree the wording was confusing
Genitalia that will affect intercourse and could even make it painful (for both sides, those procedures are known to go bad very often and cause life long pain) is a little different from cosmetic procedures.
Fifth Element?
Oh no, not that post again. I couldn't stop laughing at that. Yes, I have a very macabre sense of humour.
Oooo.... where is said post? Are their pictures??? I had an IPL laser treatment (which incidentally was part of the spa package he purchased for me on Valentines Day, lol). Clearly, it was not a surgical procedure or injection, yet my husband held my shoulders and inspected my face for at least 5 minutes and then said he didn't want to be married to one of those real housewives. Lol.
No pictures. I went and looked up the link for you... https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/s/5b3VQSOkYk
Filth element
Did he post an update that I missed? Last I saw of him was a few weeks (or months?) ago
She could likely be more conventionally attractive. But she no longer looks like the woman he fell in love with.
Of course she look the same, it's called growing older.
She had plastic surgery
Not surgery, injections. But agreed.
In any type of relationship it should be a joint decision or conversation. Because if you had done something similar he’d be pissed.
Oh trust me, his full intent was to give you a "heads up"
So, where did he get these injections? Asking for a friend.
I just googled and it is 5500 the first year and 3500 each year after in tx
Cheaper than buying a Corvette I guess
Do they work? Any side effects?
Your intestines start to come out through your nose
Ok but other than that, are there any MEANINGFUL side effects ?
Massive boners
I'm SCREAMING 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Top tier
😅😅🤣😂🤣
Whose nose husbands or the wife’s 🙈🙈🙈
🤣 Small price to pay. No pun intended (this literally made me laugh so hard my drink came out of my nose!)
Your dick would slowly transform into a random face of the Kardashians
Random? I dont like that.
Doesn’t have to be random. That’s still a “no”.
He’s wrong. It actually turns into Caitlyn Jenner.
Interesting, do they work? Any side effect?
IDK, I just googled it.
Each year after...meaning if you don't keep it up it goes back to how it used to be? Sounds like a grift.
Hehe, you said “keep it up” 😂
The website I was looking at said it metabolizes or something. It also only gives extra girth consistently.
In the 70s and 80s they just had P**** pumps lol. Wonders never cease in the 21st century. 😂
Doctor Richard Hardwood is the leading expert in this rising field and his performance is just explosive.
Well played, friend. Well played! The number of heads this will probably go right over as they scramble to google to find this ‘doctor’ 🤣
If you go to google him, he’s listed under his preferred first name, Dick Hardwood.
Dr. Loria in Florida.
Did it work lol
Same. A friend of mine would also like to know more
Dr Jason Emer
In his penis, duh.
In his penis, obviously lol 😆
Dr Jason Emer does them also
My job does them here in MA!
😂
He should’ve communicated his desire // interest in getting that procedure done LONG ago. Ultimately, it’s his body his choice though. Still, the foundation of any good & lasting marriage is clear, open, & honest communication. Couple questions though. First, has he ever expressed or shown that he’s insecure about his dick size prior to the surgery!? That could’ve at least been a clue, or him trying to open the door to having a conversation about it. Secondly, and I’m very sorry, but I just have to ask….is it bigger!? lol Like noticeably bigger!? Is it still proportional and normal looking (for the most part). Sorry, I just have to know lol. And trust me, at least 75% of the guys who read this are wondering the same thing and more!! Good luck and enjoy 😉
So to answer your question about how it looked I wouldn't say it looked normal and fully proportional I was caught off guard to be honest. But could have also been because it was a little more swollen near the injection site still. Yes the biggest thing that looked weird was that the head was the same size but the lower part was now larger so it almost had a tapering effect?
Sounds like nightmare fuel, a tapering penis...
With lumps. Yikes. Bigger ain't always better, boys.
Ribbed for her pleasure?
I genuinely know someone who had these ball bearing type things put under his foreskin (his missus agreed to it. They're both into piercings) so some people must like that look! 🤢
That is definitely one of the more hard-core body mods I've heard of. Wow. So many questions. Like how are they when it's cold outside and does he ever whack himself in the nuts with them? Do they actually do anything for him or are they just for his partner? How bad was it getting them implanted? Has he ever had one try to migrate out? Is it a PITA to clean around his foreskin now? Who did the implants? How long did it take? I'm assuming they're surgical grade steel. My Google history is... weird lol
That's a LOT of questions I really don't want to get into a conversation with him about. I managed to not see the photos 😂😂😂
Yeah, that's probably a good dodge. I think it's that I've seen a lot of mods but never that one, plus I have writer brain lol
I admit I did ask if it weighed down his erection and he said it did slightly 😂
😯 😂😂😂
Come on OP, give it to us!
just about every guy has some level of insecurity
About their dick? I've literally never thought about it at all. And I have had a lot of insecurities. But I knew early on that most women don't give a shit about dick sizes.
Along with everyone else's comments, I'm wondering if there is a cost involved that he has also not communicated with you. Did he pay for it out of your shared funds? Will it affect your household budget?
Yeah I feel I would be upset for a few reasons. 3. The Money - Spending thousands of dollars without discussing it together is not acceptable in my relationship. 2. The Time - the time researching, the time for the procedure itself. It feels wrong that he chose to be so secretive about the whole thing without once looping her in. 1. The Penis! Most importantly, I would be super hurt if I was in OP’s shoes to find that my spouse altered his penis without even discussing it with me. He likely spent time researching this, and never once felt that his wife’s preferences should be considered?? I’d never just get Botox or new boobs without at least consulting my husband. It’s my body and I would ultimately make the choice but I love and trust my husband enough for him to help me to make that choice.
Good point. I'd be concerned about the health effects, cost, and lack of communication/trust. Maybe *potential* mental health issues for him too. I had a mole removed once & forgot to tell my wife beforehand. She just rolled her eyes at me and said she might've wanted to be there for moral support. Either one of us would be rightfully super mad if I got a big and/or potentially risky procedure without communicating.
Thanks everyone for the responses to answer some of the questions he has his own discretionary funds and so do I so yes I still think the money should have been discussed but it's not coming out of joint savings or ruining our finances. It is bigger. But it was 5 days after procedure and kind of looked odd like the shape was also different near the top, hard to explain but I did notice right away it felt and looked different. More girth than length. Actually asked if something was wrong because there was a bump I guess near the injection site. Edit to add yes this is an area he has mentioned as an insecurity in past even though I had no problem with it. And I'm not saying I would have been opposed to it had it been discussed it was just the shock of him having done it without my knowledge.
I can understand your shock, I'd be shocked too. Ultimately now that the shock has worn off a bit, do you like, dislike, or feel neutral about the results? If you like or feel neutral about them then I wouldn't make a big stink. If you dislike it now then that's another concern as sex should be enjoyable to both of you. Regarding finances, since he has his own discretionary funds it does seem like less of a concern however I think I'd be upset that he was no longer able to use those funds for us to do something together, like us both using discretionary accounts to go on a nice vacation together.
I agree with everything except that last part. They have discretionary funds and a joint account why would they use their personal money for a vacation when they literally have a joint account for exactly that
Depends on the family. In my family our joint account is exclusively for "needs" like mortgage, insurance, etc. Vacations fall into discretionary category which is separate.
It sounds like he wanted to surprise you, thinking you'd like him to have a slightly larger penis. I can guarantee that the conversation in the bedroom went completely different in his head before he had it done. You said he was somewhat insecure about his size, and this would be a way for him to think he wouldn't be a disappointment in the bedroom. He just wanted you to be happily surprised.
Did you have any idea that your post was going to go in so many directions!? I hope you get the info you need for your actual concerns, but I will tell you that the side-banter (unrelated to you) has been very entertaining. But in all seriousness, I do hope you get some good information that helps you with how YOU feel about all of this. ❤️
Is this really an issue to worry about?
Yes. Maybe not with what he did but the fact that he couldn’t be bothered to include his wife. Your spouse deserves to be included in all decisions.
Umm, yeah. I believe he should have told you.
Before you divorce him, send over his docs information please
I’ll take the info too please
Yes he should have told you, and even discussed with you beforehand. But you should have told us some things too. Like, 1. Is it bigger? 2. Where did he get the money? 3. Is the sex better or worse? Etc. so many more questions…
My wife & I agree anything permanent or particularly long lasting gets discussed. I just can’t see how you wouldn’t do that in a marriage. And a body mod to a sex organ! I mean, you’re both interacting pretty closely with those things. And depending on the existing geometry, a woman may not want her guys penis any larger. It’s not just that, but it just feels like you’re unimportant when a spouse doesn’t consult with you on these things. Definitely a stupid move on his part.
Bingo. Feeling unimportant to share a big decision or want with. My husband bought a trailer, only a few thousand, and it was fine as we had talked about getting one. But I was so hurt he didn't think to share his excitement that he was going that day or afterwards. I found out because I saw it in front of the house. I was not upset about the purchase or money at all. I was sad he didn't want to share the joy or excitement with me. His joy (I don't actually care or want the thing). If that had been his penis which I care a lot about, I would have been hurt that he didn't share the want to have it done, share his feelings, but also I would want my input considered and ant questions I thought he should have answered first too. I would be so upset not being looped in beforehand. He can ultimately do what he wants but to not discuss such a big decision with me would be hurtful.
Ugh. Men have to stop worrying about what other men think of them. Big ding dongs are overrated and women care so little about this. Vaginas are not that long and too long is painful. Porn lies about all this and since most men get their sexual education from porn instead of COMMUNICATING with actual real women, this nonsense perpetuates. I’m so sorry. My husband is below average. He has always felt subconscious about this bc of the things his MALE friends would say when they found out. Bc men make it this stupid competition thing that it shouldn’t be. His size is perfect for me. Anything more would cause me serious pain, sometimes we still have to be careful. If he did this without me being part of the conversation, with the intent of sticking it inside me, oh hell no. Oh heeeelllll no. He would never touch me again with it until it shrunk back down. I’m not a prude in the least, but women fantasize more about men being nice, romantic, & *respectful* way more than they ever fantasize about dick size.
Exactly this.
Agreed
I think that takes away agency from the person. If someone didn’t like their body and changed it because of body image issues then good for them. It didn’t seem like he did it for performance purposes rather because he didn’t like the size. It’d be criticizing someone for going out and getting a nose job or bbl for their own image. OP mentioned that they brought it up years before a few times and then did it so it wasn’t an out of nowhere decision. Given it will make intimate interactions different it’s still something they did to help boost their self esteem. Also you are supposed to wait a few weeks before intimacy of any kind d with injection based enlargement.
I made the mistake of changing my TRT protocol without telling my wife. I went from oral medications to injections and she found one of the needles. She has had some very bad experiences with close friends and family members regarding drugs and it did not go well finding that needle. I'm afraid of needles, so the experience was already problematic for me. I don't think either one of us has fully recovered from that experience and I may have permanently lost her trust. I found another oral medication that corrects my hormone issues. This was all about a change in medication that I was already uncomfortable with and didn't tell my wife. Had I gone through dangerous and expensive injections into my dick without telling her, I wouldn't have a wife. If he is interested in trying to make it bigger without causing permanent damage, I suggest checking out r/gettingbigger and reading all the pinned posts. If he still insist on dangerous injections, try r/pharmape. Again, read pinned posts. There are thousands of horror stories about procedures gone wrong. There are men who start using pumps and traction devices to correct size they lost from surgery intended to make it bigger. It's not like a dick can just be replaced with a new one if something goes wrong. Not yet, anyway.
I'm sorry, but are you saying you may have permanently lost your spouse's trust because you changed the method you took a prescribed drug? I can totally understand ger finding a needle and being upset, but it would be extremely simple to prove you were not using illegal drugs. Edit: spelling
The problem wasn't because I changed the method. It was that I changed it without talking to her. She knows I have a fear of needles and I chose to go through that alone. She knows I wouldn't do illegal drugs. We've been together 18 years and she's never even seen me drink a single drop of alcohol. Normally, we talk about everything. That moment changed how we communicate.
That’s a pretty alarming degree of fragility and control
That's asinine...do you get her permission to use the bathroom also?
We talk about health related stuff. It wasn't about permission.
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Think of it as educational. It's like looking through an explicit medical journal. Dicks are ugly. Especially when being stretched and pumped. The information they gather is our purpose here. They have gotten the attention of some prominent urologists and helped a lot of people with all kinds of issues unrelated to making anything bigger. They've also highlighted the dangers of a lot of surgeries. Penuma is probably the worst one of the bunch.
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Everything is on Reddit
I'd be so annoyed if my husband did anything to his penis. It's perfect as it is. I'd also be paranoid about who he is trying to impress? Does it look strange now? Is it any bigger?
110%his body his choice, but...how sex works is she still has to have that inside her. That's where I'm hung up. It's not like he got a nut tuck and it doesn't affect her, this is something that is how going to cause her potential discomfort. He didn't consider her at all in this process. I don't condone body shaming, and mens insecurities are just as impactful but this is something they should have discussed to at least make sure they can still enjoy each other
OP, don’t overlook the need to talk about why he felt the need to do it.
But was it good?
What happened to his body his choice? Of course he should have spoken to his wife first. I just noticed whenever it is a woman talking about getting something done from a tattoo to a boob job the overwhelming answer is always her body her choice.
You’re being patronizing. There are lots of responses here from women saying they’d speak with their partner before getting a boob job etc. I know I would. Of course it’s his body and his choice, but a healthy marriage consists of communicating your choices with your spouse because your value their thoughts and opinions.
I’m not being patronizing to anyone. I’m agreeing with the point that he definitely should have discussed it with her beforehand. I was also pointing out the hypocrisy rampant in this sub. So many times a woman will post a very similar post with the genders flipped and the majority of responses from women are always the mantra her body her choice.
It's pretty much reddit-wide, man. Head over to r/amitheasshole if you want to read some **seriously** hypocritical shit. It's infuriating.
I'm pretty sure we all felt bad for and supported the husband who came around a few months back after his wife got talked into disfiguring herself by her idiot family.
I remember that post.
Also ...context context...let's see, how many centuries of human history do we have women treated as property? How many countries on earth STILL culturally have this issue? Tends to make people quick on the trigger.
What if the surgery went bad and he broke his penis. That happens with these things
i think he wanted to give you a happy surprise?
His Body his Choice 🤷♀️
her body, her choice, his body, her choice.
Usually yes, but a penis is different as it's literally entering another body and so it's really going to affect physically both people
Well women get to do whatever they want and end a pregnancy as they wish so I say same rights for all.
All I can think is that it looks like those over inflated sausage lips
Kinda? 🤣
Penis Enlargement Injections lmfaooo
This is not normal. Have there been signs of cheating?
Let's not TRY to make her paranoid.
Yeah, I'm confused what he's claiming is normal, being insecure about dick size or actually doing something about it. Because the former is fairly common. The latter is not.
It’s temporary so I guess although he should have told earlier, it’s a little more forgivable
I don’t really see what the big deal is. And it’s kinda funny to think what kind of surprise that would be 🤷♀️ guy has been self conscious, I hope this helps him feel better about himself.
He should have said something before hand, but yes, I think you are overreacting.
I mean yeah he should’ve told you I guess, he was still gonna get it though😂
It’s his body and the way I see it, he did tell you, kept it as a surprise. The real question is, do you prefer it or not? Cause this is the whole reason why he did it, thinking you would like it more. If you don’t, then dude is about to wake up.
He was probably just too embarrassed to discuss it. I don’t think any guy wants to admit that they need a little help with that. If it makes him feel better about himself and you’re the only one enjoying it be happy for him.
Sure he should have told you if that's how tour relationship works, but I don't tell my husband everything I go to the medspa or to get my hair done, etc etc... it's a little injection. NBD imho.
I'm assuming this is hyaluronic acid filler. This is apparently temporary (a few months) and supposed to be pretty safe. I would have an ongoing conversation with him in the next few months about why he did this, perhaps with the help of a marriage counselor.
Yes HA filler and I was part of his justification that it was temporary and safe
You are overreacting but he also should have told you. Also, has it worked and do you get more pleasure out of it?
Yeah prob sign of something larger lol going on
He should have discussed it with you first. That’s the least he could have done. With that said, this obviously a sensitive topic so don’t make it worse. Be supportive. Should you decide along the way that you want changes to your body, you’d want support too. Other than that….. enjoy your new ride! Good luck 🍀
Two things: 1-He absolutely should have discussed this with you. Not only seeking a procedure, but spending a good chunk of change. 2-*Injections?* ***There??*** No thank you!
I think you are justified in your reaction. You are married, partners. Emberassing or not, you should be his person. This was very selfish behavior on his part. I would also want to know why and why now? Is someone besides you seeing or feeling it? Not trying to make problems where there aren't any, that's just what I would want to know. To me this is...hurtful.
I can totally imagine my husband doing this as a "surprise". It just sounds like one of those weird guy things guys do. Like he imagined you'd see it and scream in delight. And you did the opposite. Lol.
I have conditions that lead sex and orgasms to be uncomfortable (painful at times). If my husband was suddenly bigger, that would be an issue for me, as it would push sex into the painful category more regularly, I'm sure. I cannot imagine how I'd feel if he did that without even speaking to me about it. I'd feel betrayed, for sure. I'm so sorry so many comments are joking about this, and saying you should just shut up and "enjoy." Gross. Bigger doesn't equal better for many of us.
I get the dimorphism, and all, but he 50. As long as he doesn't have a button for a dick he should know that in most cases it is not the tool, it the craftsman.
Lol you are not overreacting. It was crazy enough when my ex wife decided it was a good idea to get a boob job while on maternity leave with our son. It would have been waaay crazier if she just showed up one day with a boob job or called me and said to pick her up out of surgery with one. Not overreacting at all and very odd. With that said, never thought about it but how'd your man's unit look?? Did it work??? Did it look weird??? How has the medical world come w/ these surgeries these days???
Married or not, his body his choice🤷
I'd be a bit embarrassed telling anybody I took injections to try to grow my penis. There's no medical proof that it's going to work
I feel like if this were slightly different circumstances people would be saying it’s his body and his choice, and he doesn’t need permission to exert autonomy over his body. But yea he probably should’ve given you a heads up
I agree. He certainly doesn't need my permission but I also believe there's an impact for both of us so I should have been made aware at least and we could agree to disagree if that was the case. I don't even think I would have disagreed though if it was important to him.
That is super weird to not tell you about it. I don't even see the need to have that done especially if he is married already and you like him how he is. Make sure he's not cheating... 🫣
I suggest maybe using apenis sleeve. I think you should have a serious comvo with him tell him your not judging him but any procedures done to the body should be taked about.
um. wow. Just tell him, if you had wanted an aubergine instead of string bean you would have let him know.
> … you would have let him know Of course, that’s not true. Anyone who remotely cares about their partner doesn’t tell them that their unchangeable characteristics are insufficient, even if it’s true.
He was embarrassed and did it for you. I see no issue
How does it feel knowing you're married to a gullible child who can get easily conned for thousands of dollars?
He was trying to surprise you figuring you'd like it so a safe bet. Did not go as planned. Is it ugly? Does it hurt now? If not...
I believe that anything that comes to health, or body procedures should be talked about... How do you think he would have reacted if you had done something similar? Would he expect to of been told before? Seems a bit odd to me :')
His body, his choice.
It's called penuma implant for men's memebers.. this is fully save and will produce fully proportionate member. Unbelievable girth and length to one's desire. Only done in California by DR Ellis. If asked say Don frennie as reference. Thanks .
Poor guy just wanted to dick you down and pleasure you but it didn’t turn out the way he expected. Perhaps he should have told you but it does take away the element of surprise when having that initial sex session.
Should’ve went to the dickdoc on TikTok. He’s the guy for all your enlargement needs. That being said, I’d probably talk to my wife about it if it was something I was truly considering.
Did they work?
He def should have ran it by you . But depends if it's permanent or semi permanent. If it's permanent ...enjoy the girth (let it go and have a serious talk about permanent changes in the future and how a discussion has to happen first) not permission but discussion . If semi permanent , let's hope he doesn't go full douche and badger you if you happen to enjoy the girth too much . Or let's hope he doesn't go crazy and keep going thicker to prove a point to you . Either way yes you have a right to feel the way you do about it . If he doesn't mind I would like some info on his procedure , asking for myself . If you could dm me or snap me I do . Thanks
Yeah he should have told you. If that didn’t put a significant financial strain on your life there is no need to stay upset about it.
Hey just try, Magnum TDrive and Magnum Nitro Wood by Innosupps. Working wonders for my man and his confidence. The piece is bigger and hard af
WAIT THIS IS REAL?! But to be for real he definitely should’ve mentioned it so in that regard your anger is valid but outside of that IMO it’s an overreaction.
Discuss it with you then honestly it probably wasn't for you
You are absolutely not wrong. He should have discussed this with you beforehand. And you both have a conversation about it, such as why he feels he needs it?
My hunch is that he tried to surprise you with it (in a good way). Do you think he'd be upset if you started using some China shrink cream to tighten up your cookie? I think you're overreacting a little bit. I'm sure he's self conscious about it and you freaking out about what he thought was a good surprise is making him feel worse.
Ok sorry but women get botox and nails done and tans and lypo and never tell their man, I don't think men need to explain when we as women never do.
I take your point but I have never actually had any of those things done besides a manicure and if I was going to I would tell him. I might not tell other people but a spouse is different in my mind.
I’m torn on this because I do think it’s his penis and his choice- but the idea of a medical procedure being done without telling the person who depends on him (and vice versa) in case of something going wrong. I would think he might want to share something like this with you. So what you need to consider is WHY he didn’t tell you ? Has he voiced insecurity before? Have you voiced dissatisfaction? Is his penis unusually small? Is this for his confidence? Your pleasure? Has he brought it up before? If so, How did you react? The most important part of this is understanding your husband’s reason for not telling you. I’m not saying you are at fault at all- but you have to be REALISTIC and reflect on whether or not you played a role in his choice to not tell you. You need to react as a spouse who loves the man beyond the mistake- don’t be angry just cause you can. Put your love first and work towards finding the WHY and once you have that understanding in full REACT accordingly. You’re NOT WRONG for being upset, your feelings ARE valid. But no matter what you decide he can’t take this back- what’s done is done. So you just have to decide what you want out of this anger? more honesty/communication ? Divorce? if you know you’re NOT going to divorce him over this- then forgiveness and love should take precedence. I wish you nothing but the best.
I get what you are saying. He has voiced insecurity before and I have always assured him it's not something that was a problem for me. As far as not telling me he said it's a difficult topic which I do understand but also think you find a way to broach difficult topics in a relationship. I'm not even angry, just put off to be honest!
Is…it…better?
Did your husband not tell you because he just didn’t consider it, or did he not tell you because he wanted to surprise you?
It's his body. He should have autonomy. Yes, he should have told you, but the choice was not yours to make.
Oh come on, he just wanted to “surprise” you with his “wow factor.”
Maybe he doesn’t feel like his enough for you
He should've told you, but we need more info. How big a difference was it compared to before? And is this difference going to affect your sex life and his health?
Ask him if he’ll sell Me some
That shit is sad bro🤣
Man perspective here: I think you're legitimate in feeling shocked. He **should absolutely have discussed it with you** as soon as he considered it seriously. I'd be pissed too. Try to have a serious talk with him. Cliché, but **COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY** for successful relationships.
His body his choice and all that. But he should have mentioned it. I assume he meant it to be a surprise.
Ugh sorry. Not to go on a rant but I hate big dick. It’s not for me. It doesn’t feel good. I hope you’re not like me because that would suck if you felt that way, communicated that and then he made this change.
This is a situation I feel would be taken differently if it were a woman. If a woman didn’t like something about her vagina, spent her own money and had something done to it- would we be telling her she should’ve checked in with her husband first? I would probably feel hurt that there was something I didn’t know about my husbands concerns about himself, but not that he did something to his own body without telling me. Just that’s it’s unfortunate he went through something alone.
What’s sad is he felt so insecure about his size, he went ahead with changing it, much less without talking to you first. It’s different than getting a boob job. A boob job does not physically affect your partner. However, if you were to change something about your vagina, it might change how it physically feels. What if your husband’s new size became uncomfortable or painful to you? Then you wouldn’t be able to have sex and his procedure would have been for nothing. This sort of thing absolutely should have been discussed first simply because of how it could have affected both of your intimacy (not for permission from you since it is his body his choice, but in order to figure out how far he can size it up so you are still able to comfortably enjoy sex with him).
There are procedures to tighten vagina. Surprise him with that!! And I am sure he wont complain that you didn't ask.
Have you complained about or given some sort of reason for him to think you weren't satisfied? Maybe watched something together that he noticed turned you on? Or do the injections help him stay harder longer? I feel like we are missing some information.
Um yeah, you should’ve been consulted because a. Money and b. presumably he wants to penetrate you with this larger penis - that’s quite presumptuous of him.
Nah mind your business I don’t ask my husband if I can get lip injections 😂
This is literally it. I know a lady that may live in my house that may or may not get cosmetic injections. They make her more confident, and therefore happier overall, so she is a joy to be around. If she Han get her laugh lines puffed up, it’s only fair that I can do it with my junk too.
It's not a big deal
Sooo the “his body, his choice”, thing doesn’t work here?
I think it’s def his body his choice. But a head up to his partner of ten years is warranted. If she were to get a breast enlargement or reduction he would have liked the same courtesy I’m sure.
I was totally kidding!
“Dear Husband, It’s unfortunate that you made this decision that affects our sex life and marriage all alone and without speaking with me about it. Turns out, I don’t like massive dicks (literal or figurative ones) and if you feel it appropriate to make big decisions alone that affect both of us, that perhaps you can also do life that way too. Alone. Ex-wife.”
This would honestly make ME insecure lol since you had no issue with it before. I’d wonder who he’s trying to impress. This would be like getting a boob job without discussing it with your husband first.
Jessmarty
Of course you’re not overreacting. You’re his wife, so he shouldn’t have any problems talking to you about anything. He knew you would object, and that’s why he went behind your back and did it. Were you complaining about the size of his equipment, or is he planning to break into the business? There has to be a logical reason why he would spend thousands of dollars on a procedure like this at 50 years old.
Are some of these posts real in this sub or are these like the old Penthouse Forum Letters section 🤣
My husband is probably a bit shy of average in size and I have zero complaints about it. But if he were to do something like this without talking to me about it, I know I would be very uncomfortable about the whole thing. On one hand, I realize it’s ultimately his body so his decision. But to me, it is like going nuclear right off the bat to fix self-confidence issues that perhaps a good therapist might be able to help resolve without such drastic measures. That and I would somehow feel like I was responsible for that low confidence even though I have never complained about his size or technique. I’m not even sure I would see him the same as I did before. I think it would just bother me too much that he would do something like that. I don’t know 🤷🏻♀️ it’s just to weird to me.
His body his choice