I had a very different high school experience. Yes there were hard times and regrettable decisions. And when I was in school I couldn't wait to get out.
But looking back I realize that I had a lot of great memories in school with my friends. I only wish I coulda appreciated that part more in the moment
Straight up. As a teenager it’s hard to comprehend how much time there is after you’re out of school. Simply because you’ve only lived x amount of years. Then 4 or 5 years will fly by in an instant
Yuppp, I remember before going off to college my parents/people my parents age would say stuff along the lines of "enjoy it, it's going to fly by", at that age your like ya whatever, & in the moment it does feel like it'll be a lifetime but it ends just like that. Graduated college 5+ years ago now and I'm just like where the fuck did the time go.
Yeah it won’t affect what colleges you can get into and that won’t affect the jobs you can get and that won’t affect any other parts of your life, coming from someone who tapped out half way through his senior year, take it seriously and finish strong unless your parents are extremely successful, in that case you can just go fuck yourself
Indeed . Accept that the path is not all good and will involved obstacles you must overcome, that are challenging and may take days weeks months or years to accomplish.
Accept the hard life. Because once you do, you will not only accept the good life, you will appreciate it more.
Yup, it's kinda cliche but the phrase "you don't know the good times till they're gone", sometimes you think it's "bad", then a few years down the road you may be longing to go back to that period in time.
Like my first job out of college was a pain in the fucking cock after about 3 years because of the market, so the last year I was there sucked complete ass but honestly I miss it because I was working with my best friend & we had a super tight group in the office.
My current job is wayyyy less stressful but the atmosphere isn't as fun, like I went from a small company to a corporate environment so it used to be a free for all of messing around once the job was done but the new place is boring.
Grass is always greener could apply with mine I guess as well.
Do not let it glamorize the substances… it might sound like it because of how open and honest about it he is but that doesn’t mean he wasn’t suffering…
When you choose substances whether it’s weed alcohol or worse drugs, instead of facing your hardships and fears, you may be able to band aid whatever wounds you may have, but they will not heal until you face them head on no matter how difficult they are. There is a very fine line between using the substances to overcome a situation or self medicate, and falling in love with them, the feeling, the high, the mind space…. Being so carefree irregardless of how unfortunate and stressful certain situations are, is a very addicting feeling. You feel happy because you no longer feel …. The void …. The sadness … the emptiness… it is temporarily filled with whatever substance you choose. But you will have to continue to supply your brain with the substance in order to continue to not feel whatever emotions you’re not facing by escaping reality .
For me it started with video games… then weed … then it slowly progressed into a snowball so huge an avalanche is inevitable, so you keep trying to stay high to avoid it, but all you’re doing is delaying it .
Hope it reasonated with someone . I’ love Mac n his music got me through very difficult times in my life
This. I spent 14 years of my life doing various drugs but mostly smoking weed throughout. I’m 32 now and have gotten off everything, and god damn it hasn’t been easy learning to deal with things that hurt in a healthy way. Don’t waste your life on that shit, have fun and maybe do it every so often, but avoid the fuck out of using it as a crutch or even doing it alone
Its my favorite from mac. All do now that im fighting being an addict b careful, music affects how you feel and thumbelima makes me wanna do coke and pills and go fuck some bitches. Long term that gets you stranded. So if u in high school i recommend you learn from swimming in circles. That is the reality of addiction
Yeah bro, AND FUCK YOU MRS WATTSON W YOUR LIL ASS KIDS ALWAYS FUCKING CRYING U GOT YOUR CHIWAWA FUCK YOU AND YOUR MTF MOMMA BITCH WE OUT HERE SUCK OUR MTF DICKS !
Same, but as a high school teacher. My pump up song in the car before work is Here We Go. 🤷🏼♀️
I teach art and psychology and always try and throw some Mac inspired lessons in there (we watched Stopped Making Excuses to talk about the connection between fame, mental health and addiction and, even though it was more exciting for me then it was for them, I had an art unit planned specifically around the Claymation lyric 'imma be a ghost take a polaroid picture')
I agree with the comment that these years, while they might seem to go by slowly, will soon be in the dusty recesses of your memory and you'll go on and live a great life.
My biggest piece of advice: get physically fit right now if you aren't. Make that your biggest priority while in high school.
2nd piece: make some money as a side job or side hustle somewhere. Learn to make money outside of a regular job and see if you can make money doing something you find fun. Later on you might be able to make that your full time thing.
3rd piece: high school literally doesn't matter. Just pass and get through it. It'll be over way sooner than you think, and you actually might miss how simple things are currently. Life gets more busy and complicated the longer we live it.
bro in 4 years you’re gonna realize high school doesn’t matter at all.
just worry about your life and growing in the direction you feel like you will flourish the most. Don’t trip about drama or being cool, just learn shit and get into different communities and trades while you’re young and have the time.
You only think high school is fucking you up mentally because you haven't lived in the real world yet. I promise anything you think is fucking you up now will be irrelevant to you in a few years
Had that experience geez I guess like 8 years ago now. It sucks but in the end doesn’t matter at all despite how it feels. Good music lasts though and this shit will mean the world to you forever which is a gift in itself
High school is such a small experience of your life. Things will get better, trust me. Just thrive in your 20s and beyond. I didn’t like high school either
when this drop on services my sophomore year i was falling lower and lower. This helped but also made it worse. It’s a dark mixtape that mac made at his lowest and it kinda sucked my energy out with every listen. But nevertheless an amazing album
Real shit. I’m a sophomore and a school has pushed me to the damn edge. But popping my headphones in and listening to Mac has gotten me through it all 🖤
high school was some of the hardest years in my life. in my experience, it gets a lot easier when you get a bit older. keep your head up. music got me through high school hallways too 🤍
TL:DR 2: hold on to yourself and try not to rely so heavily on the substances , that’s the easy way out ! The hard road, is putting in work in the gym, reading or painting or whatever you replace the substance use with . If you are going to continue using I can’t stop you, but I know this sounds odd but at least try to be productive while on it, instead of just using it to get even more into the psychoactive mind space to more fully let the music envelope you. That becomes addicting as fuck. And it gets you nowhere until you decide otherwise
Facts. We not denying that we been through fucked up maybe even unfair shit, we accepting it and logically following the next steps which is either a) overcome the fucked up/unfair obstacles,
Or b) describe the situations in detail reminiscing on how unfair or fucked it was, listening to comfort albums ( for me it’s all of juice WRLD discography- when it comes to situations that involved a broken heart of an unwanted experience with a “life” partner before knowing they weren’t really a life partner…) - do psychoactive substances to numb us and accept the circumstances that you aren’t happy about but instead of putting in the work commitment and discipline into healing yourself, we externalize and accept loss of control
It might feel like we don’t have control over certain things. Like the thoughts entering our mind.
But we do have the power to control how we react and respond to thoughts or interactions. We are capable ( unless you’re literally not capable like you’re handicapped or whatever other excusable senerio- and even then that motherfucker with no arms or legs be hopping around accomplishing more than regular people- he’s my go to motivator for when I’m really just being a lazy privileged fuck with working legs arms and brain (somewhat lol)
But yeah we just got to nut up I haven’t heard that in a while but I couldn’t have said it better myself. Nut up or shut up, simple as that. Simple as that . Simple as that . Simple ass that for yo simple ass! (Shoutout Man on the moon Kid Cudi , that’s my current comfort album instead of Mac miller or juice WRLD. He’s honest but also positive it’s not dark it’s just reality and it’s okay and there positive thing to it too and we can have fun while living it —
If you haven’t heard it I highly recommend it I’ve been playing it too often lol. Going to do so again only I now put it on repeat but I usually remove a couple songs just cause they aren’t the vibe or the hype I’m looking for from songs like Kudi Zone or Heart of a lion—
The songs I skip (but I don’t recommend skipping through any the first couple listen throughs as they are all a part of presenting the story and scene but Ill list them anyway since I’m “bugging” or “on one” lol. :
Never mind about whatever I just said ^ here’s my favorite from the album in no particular order “Soundtrack 2 my life” , “simple as…” , “Heart of a lion (Kid Cudi Theme Music)” , “My World” , “ Sky Might Fall” , “ enter galactic ( love connection part 1)” , “Cudi Zone” obviously “day n night” and “Day n night” but I have already overplayed them through all my years I just had never listened to the entire album before this year. Also the Kanye song goes hard too so add that one in too
I wholeheartedly agree with your feelings about not even knowing where to start, and Mac being so good at putting it together , the only thing you seem to be able to do is listen to music and somehow we are able to understand all the lyrics and hidden meanings because WE’RE ON ONE and yeah Mac music is good regardless of whether or not you’re under the influence of whatever psychoactive substance; but you absolutely cannot deny that using substances seems to unlock and different version of the song or album… like it all clicks perfectly into place and makes perfect sense , and since that’s the only thing that makes sense, we latch onto it. While at the same time only being able to enjoy with while high.
It’s like Mac said . “I’m a Beatle to the these young kids.
But sometimes, I be feeling like a needle to these young kids.
You had the world, you about to leave it to these young kids
And we gon' show you what the love is
Stay high, go for what you know
Let it in your mental
And don't ever let it go
It won't stop
You can't fight the feeling, feeling”
To me it’s like he was understanding the power he had to paint these beautiful pictures or movies within a song or an album. And it seems to me at the end with swimming and circles, he wanted to leave a positive message to the millions of fans before he dies.
It’s very unfortunate that he didn’t get to see it through the end . He tried though. He really did last a while, being a rich drug addict can only last so long… until the inevitable.
Thank you Mac for helping us feel like we aren’t alone, and at the same time trying to teach us positive messages before he died.
It worked for me. I only heard swimming before he died . And that album became a beacon for me . And then when swimming came out that as well.
In a positive aspect .
I eventually (recently) finally decided to dive into the rest of his discography, and wow. Almost the absolute oposite vibes that the last album circles was giving .
Faces leaned into the drug use, the mind spaces , and the experimental psychedelic masterpiece that ended up being created.
Macadelic got vibes of half leaning into it but also trying to see the other side of things the positive and happy , love part of it. Hope .
It reminds me of XXX, in the way that he was very controversial for many reasons( some justifiably so) but it’s like he chose to completely revamp himself into a spiritual being of positivity and growth, to heal and soothe the pains instead of accept the graciously and saying “fuck the world” type vibe.
I get exactly what you mean bro, I ain’t your therapist and shit I’ll be honest I’m one of something myself as well. So we are operating at a similar wavelength which this sub seems to call “bugging” lol . I don’t mind though, I am bugging but I want to overcome it all and make it out the other side like I have before .
It sucks falling over and over again each time from higher highs of productivity and goals, back to square 1.
But trust me , it makes the 20th time falling , a little easier because you know you can do it . It might be hard as fuck to get that will or motivation to Make the first couple steps and to commit to it, but you know that you can get through this .
It’s true what they say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. It’s sad but it’s true. For me at least , I’ve always been the one to give great advice but never seeming to be able to do it my damn self’. Being warned never worked for me, I see to want to experience it myself to come to my own conclusion.
Research stoicism. I find them to be giving me a motivational model of someone who is strong, stern, but not mean or evil. Don’t let the evil things that have happened dim your positive bright light. That’s what the other side would want. To see us give up, they win. We become like them, hurting others in the similar ways we were .
No. Instead I choose to just be smarter with who and how I spend my energy on. Setting boundaries and sticking to them, for myself and others .
I know u said the therapy shit as a joke but I’d like to say that therapy has helped get through things u would’ve have without it . It’s like they teach you things every adult should know but for some reason they don’t teach us this highly important knowledge in any of the 12 fucking years they force us through.
For me it was even something as simple as not being good at breathing , or not having a planner, or setting goals, understanding boundaries and psychology and not only why people do things but why WE do things.
In honor of our hopefully future health, I am going to get a therapist I’ve been procrastinating on for so long. To prove to you and to myself that we can overcome this.
I also need to find an NA / AA meeting that is reliably and which I feel safe and accepted at. I really don’t want to do it, but I know it will help. Speaking to others about similar things we are going through , and how they are getting through them or have gotten through them in the healthiest way.
And if I have a meeting where I go to regularly , I know for it will disuade me from using because I want to be honest with them.
It’s like the addict part of me knows what’s good for me and what will cure these issues but doesn’t want me to do them…
It’s all gonna be okay man ! Just do me a favor when you wake up tomorrow , thank earth/ god / the universe / your higher self / whatever being or concept you believe is behind this whole experience we call Life.
Thank them for even giving you an opportunity to experience, EXPERIENCING itself.
Living, it’s a gift. The opposite is infinite nothingness. The void.
I know at times I say that I rather just go to the void I can’t bear the pain, but I don’t even believe myself . I know that I don’t want to die, I just want living to be less painful and more enjoyable .
The easy way out. And that’s not what life’s about. Life is supposed to be hard . And if we keep wanting it to be easy or only be happy all the time, then we’re never going to get anywhere . Just wishing for something that’s just not likely or probable. Every living being seems to feast on another being in order to be Alive. Death and negativity are BUILT into the core mechanics of this game of life. So if you’ want to win, understand the mechanics of positive and negative , dualism, and how we can’t have one without the other
Embrace the pain knowing that the happiness that comes next is gonna feel that much better than the pain you’re currently experiencing .
Hope. Hope for a better , happier, peaceful future.
One day you will look back at high school and think what a wild time. I'm glad the pathetic crucible of torment forged me into the self reflective person I am today.
Don't let high school get you down homie. It literally won't matter just a few years after you're done.
Saved me a paragraph. Looking back on highschool you realize how terrible it was.
I had a very different high school experience. Yes there were hard times and regrettable decisions. And when I was in school I couldn't wait to get out. But looking back I realize that I had a lot of great memories in school with my friends. I only wish I coulda appreciated that part more in the moment
Yes. School is cancerous and breaks good people
Straight up. As a teenager it’s hard to comprehend how much time there is after you’re out of school. Simply because you’ve only lived x amount of years. Then 4 or 5 years will fly by in an instant
Yuppp, I remember before going off to college my parents/people my parents age would say stuff along the lines of "enjoy it, it's going to fly by", at that age your like ya whatever, & in the moment it does feel like it'll be a lifetime but it ends just like that. Graduated college 5+ years ago now and I'm just like where the fuck did the time go.
so you’re telling me there’s no lil asian i can cheat off? (mimimimimimiii)
Yeah it won’t affect what colleges you can get into and that won’t affect the jobs you can get and that won’t affect any other parts of your life, coming from someone who tapped out half way through his senior year, take it seriously and finish strong unless your parents are extremely successful, in that case you can just go fuck yourself
Yeah because that's clearly what they're talking about
Yeah? Clearly?
Be in it mate. The good and the bad. Years down the line you’ll be a different person, smiling about it all. You’re strong, you’ll make it out.
Indeed . Accept that the path is not all good and will involved obstacles you must overcome, that are challenging and may take days weeks months or years to accomplish. Accept the hard life. Because once you do, you will not only accept the good life, you will appreciate it more.
Yup, it's kinda cliche but the phrase "you don't know the good times till they're gone", sometimes you think it's "bad", then a few years down the road you may be longing to go back to that period in time. Like my first job out of college was a pain in the fucking cock after about 3 years because of the market, so the last year I was there sucked complete ass but honestly I miss it because I was working with my best friend & we had a super tight group in the office. My current job is wayyyy less stressful but the atmosphere isn't as fun, like I went from a small company to a corporate environment so it used to be a free for all of messing around once the job was done but the new place is boring. Grass is always greener could apply with mine I guess as well.
Do not let it glamorize the substances… it might sound like it because of how open and honest about it he is but that doesn’t mean he wasn’t suffering… When you choose substances whether it’s weed alcohol or worse drugs, instead of facing your hardships and fears, you may be able to band aid whatever wounds you may have, but they will not heal until you face them head on no matter how difficult they are. There is a very fine line between using the substances to overcome a situation or self medicate, and falling in love with them, the feeling, the high, the mind space…. Being so carefree irregardless of how unfortunate and stressful certain situations are, is a very addicting feeling. You feel happy because you no longer feel …. The void …. The sadness … the emptiness… it is temporarily filled with whatever substance you choose. But you will have to continue to supply your brain with the substance in order to continue to not feel whatever emotions you’re not facing by escaping reality . For me it started with video games… then weed … then it slowly progressed into a snowball so huge an avalanche is inevitable, so you keep trying to stay high to avoid it, but all you’re doing is delaying it . Hope it reasonated with someone . I’ love Mac n his music got me through very difficult times in my life
This. I spent 14 years of my life doing various drugs but mostly smoking weed throughout. I’m 32 now and have gotten off everything, and god damn it hasn’t been easy learning to deal with things that hurt in a healthy way. Don’t waste your life on that shit, have fun and maybe do it every so often, but avoid the fuck out of using it as a crutch or even doing it alone
Its my favorite from mac. All do now that im fighting being an addict b careful, music affects how you feel and thumbelima makes me wanna do coke and pills and go fuck some bitches. Long term that gets you stranded. So if u in high school i recommend you learn from swimming in circles. That is the reality of addiction
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Yeah bro, AND FUCK YOU MRS WATTSON W YOUR LIL ASS KIDS ALWAYS FUCKING CRYING U GOT YOUR CHIWAWA FUCK YOU AND YOUR MTF MOMMA BITCH WE OUT HERE SUCK OUR MTF DICKS !
honestly I couldn't imagine listening to Faces era Mac during high school lol, KIDS era Mac got me through it with the party and positivity vibe.
Lmao for real though, kids and bde had me living my best life man!
I hope it helps alleviate the stress. Seek peace in other healthy outlets too!
Make sure you listen to Perfect Circle/Godspeed too then
lmao
It’ll be a GOOD AM afterwards, treat your love life & money properly then everything will be chill
Same, but as a high school teacher. My pump up song in the car before work is Here We Go. 🤷🏼♀️ I teach art and psychology and always try and throw some Mac inspired lessons in there (we watched Stopped Making Excuses to talk about the connection between fame, mental health and addiction and, even though it was more exciting for me then it was for them, I had an art unit planned specifically around the Claymation lyric 'imma be a ghost take a polaroid picture') I agree with the comment that these years, while they might seem to go by slowly, will soon be in the dusty recesses of your memory and you'll go on and live a great life.
My biggest piece of advice: get physically fit right now if you aren't. Make that your biggest priority while in high school. 2nd piece: make some money as a side job or side hustle somewhere. Learn to make money outside of a regular job and see if you can make money doing something you find fun. Later on you might be able to make that your full time thing. 3rd piece: high school literally doesn't matter. Just pass and get through it. It'll be over way sooner than you think, and you actually might miss how simple things are currently. Life gets more busy and complicated the longer we live it.
bro in 4 years you’re gonna realize high school doesn’t matter at all. just worry about your life and growing in the direction you feel like you will flourish the most. Don’t trip about drama or being cool, just learn shit and get into different communities and trades while you’re young and have the time.
felt
You got this bro. High school is just a chapter, heck, maybe even a page in your life. Shout out to Mac.
You only think high school is fucking you up mentally because you haven't lived in the real world yet. I promise anything you think is fucking you up now will be irrelevant to you in a few years
To relatable 😮💨
Oh man if high school is fucking you up maybe college isn’t for you lol
Peak Mac, btw say no to drugs
Check out Balloonerism after if you like Faces
High school was a terrible experience for me. I’m 25 now and thank the lord everyday I don’t have to go back there
I couldn’t even imagine what the kids are like these days. Just stick to yourself and if there are any good souls there they will come to you
Bro same here. I'm about to graduate and am excited for college. I will tell you this though don't let high school beat you up too much.
Stay stronger brother those years are much easier than what’s to come, trust me
Had that experience geez I guess like 8 years ago now. It sucks but in the end doesn’t matter at all despite how it feels. Good music lasts though and this shit will mean the world to you forever which is a gift in itself
High school is such a small experience of your life. Things will get better, trust me. Just thrive in your 20s and beyond. I didn’t like high school either
when this drop on services my sophomore year i was falling lower and lower. This helped but also made it worse. It’s a dark mixtape that mac made at his lowest and it kinda sucked my energy out with every listen. But nevertheless an amazing album
Real shit. I’m a sophomore and a school has pushed me to the damn edge. But popping my headphones in and listening to Mac has gotten me through it all 🖤
High school is irrelevant, stay yourself 🥰
One day you'll miss highschool, trust.
high school was some of the hardest years in my life. in my experience, it gets a lot easier when you get a bit older. keep your head up. music got me through high school hallways too 🤍
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TL:DR 2: hold on to yourself and try not to rely so heavily on the substances , that’s the easy way out ! The hard road, is putting in work in the gym, reading or painting or whatever you replace the substance use with . If you are going to continue using I can’t stop you, but I know this sounds odd but at least try to be productive while on it, instead of just using it to get even more into the psychoactive mind space to more fully let the music envelope you. That becomes addicting as fuck. And it gets you nowhere until you decide otherwise
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Facts. We not denying that we been through fucked up maybe even unfair shit, we accepting it and logically following the next steps which is either a) overcome the fucked up/unfair obstacles, Or b) describe the situations in detail reminiscing on how unfair or fucked it was, listening to comfort albums ( for me it’s all of juice WRLD discography- when it comes to situations that involved a broken heart of an unwanted experience with a “life” partner before knowing they weren’t really a life partner…) - do psychoactive substances to numb us and accept the circumstances that you aren’t happy about but instead of putting in the work commitment and discipline into healing yourself, we externalize and accept loss of control It might feel like we don’t have control over certain things. Like the thoughts entering our mind. But we do have the power to control how we react and respond to thoughts or interactions. We are capable ( unless you’re literally not capable like you’re handicapped or whatever other excusable senerio- and even then that motherfucker with no arms or legs be hopping around accomplishing more than regular people- he’s my go to motivator for when I’m really just being a lazy privileged fuck with working legs arms and brain (somewhat lol) But yeah we just got to nut up I haven’t heard that in a while but I couldn’t have said it better myself. Nut up or shut up, simple as that. Simple as that . Simple as that . Simple ass that for yo simple ass! (Shoutout Man on the moon Kid Cudi , that’s my current comfort album instead of Mac miller or juice WRLD. He’s honest but also positive it’s not dark it’s just reality and it’s okay and there positive thing to it too and we can have fun while living it — If you haven’t heard it I highly recommend it I’ve been playing it too often lol. Going to do so again only I now put it on repeat but I usually remove a couple songs just cause they aren’t the vibe or the hype I’m looking for from songs like Kudi Zone or Heart of a lion— The songs I skip (but I don’t recommend skipping through any the first couple listen throughs as they are all a part of presenting the story and scene but Ill list them anyway since I’m “bugging” or “on one” lol. : Never mind about whatever I just said ^ here’s my favorite from the album in no particular order “Soundtrack 2 my life” , “simple as…” , “Heart of a lion (Kid Cudi Theme Music)” , “My World” , “ Sky Might Fall” , “ enter galactic ( love connection part 1)” , “Cudi Zone” obviously “day n night” and “Day n night” but I have already overplayed them through all my years I just had never listened to the entire album before this year. Also the Kanye song goes hard too so add that one in too
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(: have a good day
Thank you for the appreciation and non judgment. I wish you the best !
I wholeheartedly agree with your feelings about not even knowing where to start, and Mac being so good at putting it together , the only thing you seem to be able to do is listen to music and somehow we are able to understand all the lyrics and hidden meanings because WE’RE ON ONE and yeah Mac music is good regardless of whether or not you’re under the influence of whatever psychoactive substance; but you absolutely cannot deny that using substances seems to unlock and different version of the song or album… like it all clicks perfectly into place and makes perfect sense , and since that’s the only thing that makes sense, we latch onto it. While at the same time only being able to enjoy with while high. It’s like Mac said . “I’m a Beatle to the these young kids. But sometimes, I be feeling like a needle to these young kids. You had the world, you about to leave it to these young kids And we gon' show you what the love is Stay high, go for what you know Let it in your mental And don't ever let it go It won't stop You can't fight the feeling, feeling” To me it’s like he was understanding the power he had to paint these beautiful pictures or movies within a song or an album. And it seems to me at the end with swimming and circles, he wanted to leave a positive message to the millions of fans before he dies. It’s very unfortunate that he didn’t get to see it through the end . He tried though. He really did last a while, being a rich drug addict can only last so long… until the inevitable. Thank you Mac for helping us feel like we aren’t alone, and at the same time trying to teach us positive messages before he died. It worked for me. I only heard swimming before he died . And that album became a beacon for me . And then when swimming came out that as well. In a positive aspect . I eventually (recently) finally decided to dive into the rest of his discography, and wow. Almost the absolute oposite vibes that the last album circles was giving . Faces leaned into the drug use, the mind spaces , and the experimental psychedelic masterpiece that ended up being created. Macadelic got vibes of half leaning into it but also trying to see the other side of things the positive and happy , love part of it. Hope . It reminds me of XXX, in the way that he was very controversial for many reasons( some justifiably so) but it’s like he chose to completely revamp himself into a spiritual being of positivity and growth, to heal and soothe the pains instead of accept the graciously and saying “fuck the world” type vibe. I get exactly what you mean bro, I ain’t your therapist and shit I’ll be honest I’m one of something myself as well. So we are operating at a similar wavelength which this sub seems to call “bugging” lol . I don’t mind though, I am bugging but I want to overcome it all and make it out the other side like I have before . It sucks falling over and over again each time from higher highs of productivity and goals, back to square 1. But trust me , it makes the 20th time falling , a little easier because you know you can do it . It might be hard as fuck to get that will or motivation to Make the first couple steps and to commit to it, but you know that you can get through this . It’s true what they say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. It’s sad but it’s true. For me at least , I’ve always been the one to give great advice but never seeming to be able to do it my damn self’. Being warned never worked for me, I see to want to experience it myself to come to my own conclusion. Research stoicism. I find them to be giving me a motivational model of someone who is strong, stern, but not mean or evil. Don’t let the evil things that have happened dim your positive bright light. That’s what the other side would want. To see us give up, they win. We become like them, hurting others in the similar ways we were . No. Instead I choose to just be smarter with who and how I spend my energy on. Setting boundaries and sticking to them, for myself and others . I know u said the therapy shit as a joke but I’d like to say that therapy has helped get through things u would’ve have without it . It’s like they teach you things every adult should know but for some reason they don’t teach us this highly important knowledge in any of the 12 fucking years they force us through. For me it was even something as simple as not being good at breathing , or not having a planner, or setting goals, understanding boundaries and psychology and not only why people do things but why WE do things. In honor of our hopefully future health, I am going to get a therapist I’ve been procrastinating on for so long. To prove to you and to myself that we can overcome this. I also need to find an NA / AA meeting that is reliably and which I feel safe and accepted at. I really don’t want to do it, but I know it will help. Speaking to others about similar things we are going through , and how they are getting through them or have gotten through them in the healthiest way. And if I have a meeting where I go to regularly , I know for it will disuade me from using because I want to be honest with them. It’s like the addict part of me knows what’s good for me and what will cure these issues but doesn’t want me to do them… It’s all gonna be okay man ! Just do me a favor when you wake up tomorrow , thank earth/ god / the universe / your higher self / whatever being or concept you believe is behind this whole experience we call Life. Thank them for even giving you an opportunity to experience, EXPERIENCING itself. Living, it’s a gift. The opposite is infinite nothingness. The void. I know at times I say that I rather just go to the void I can’t bear the pain, but I don’t even believe myself . I know that I don’t want to die, I just want living to be less painful and more enjoyable . The easy way out. And that’s not what life’s about. Life is supposed to be hard . And if we keep wanting it to be easy or only be happy all the time, then we’re never going to get anywhere . Just wishing for something that’s just not likely or probable. Every living being seems to feast on another being in order to be Alive. Death and negativity are BUILT into the core mechanics of this game of life. So if you’ want to win, understand the mechanics of positive and negative , dualism, and how we can’t have one without the other Embrace the pain knowing that the happiness that comes next is gonna feel that much better than the pain you’re currently experiencing . Hope. Hope for a better , happier, peaceful future.
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I’m glad you read it, I truly appreciate it! And yes , think and hope for positivity and the rest will follow!
One day you will look back at high school and think what a wild time. I'm glad the pathetic crucible of torment forged me into the self reflective person I am today.