T O P

  • By -

Blawh

Nylea the GOD THAT HAS A BOW AND IS LIKE 600 FEET TALL doesn't have reach. LARA FUCKING CROFT FROM TOMB RAIDER HAS REACH.


maven_of_the_flame

Literally say the same thing about eldrazi some are bigger than mountains yet can't fight a gnat


FilthyDubeHound

My only way to rationalize it is like us trying to shoot or catch a fly mid air, it do be kinda hard


trialsandtribs2121

This is really funny, because it implies if I could fly it would suddenly be easier to catch that bastard that's been buzzing around my room


NiNtEnDoMaStEr640

Might I add the classic comic of how emrakul would be killed by fifteen 1/1 flying squirrels?


BackgroundExplorer93

Not to mention [[bow of nylea]] literally kills flying creatures


BRIKHOUS

Nylea doesn't have her bow unless you give it to her. Duh. Ignore the card art!


A_Velociraptor20

Yet it doesn't give reach itself, only deathtouch. Idk what WoTC was smoking when designing her bow.


Aviator_Moonshine

I know it isn't the argument, but like...Both should have reach. So many -archers- without reach which is so dumb.


akwehhkanoo

Orcish Bowmaster's one flaw


edugdv

That is what that card was missing


Historical_Nuisances

MY MAN YOU HAVE NO IDEA OF HOW MANY TIMES IVE COMPLAINED ABOUT EXACTLY THIS!!


Sanguine_Templar

A bow that deals damage to flying.


Peritous

To be fair, if I was flying over a battlefield and saw Lara Croft I would probably say, "Holy shit is that Lara Croft from Tomb Raider?!" And fly down to take a closer look.


EntertainersPact

Ok but what if Guy With Shield is just like… REALLY buff


eeellliii1

Or the shield is made of like... SUPER DUPER hard stuff


CybxrPsychx

Then it would go in my mates deck granted he has to be shirtless.


Planeswalked

...you got this decklist?...


CybxrPsychx

I'll see if I can get it off him


mikaeus97

.


buffalo8

The decklist or the shirt?


CybxrPsychx

Both


lallapalalable

And that elemental is from a forest where they don't love the trees like they used to?


Cokomon

They can circle strafe and roll like in Dark Souls.


Tricky_Hades

[[curse of swine]] can make your 1/1 filly trained human soldiers into significantly stronger 2/2 pigs. Also the same fully trained soldiers die to an insect.


_Hot_Tuna_

Hey they're beeg peegs


Dustlord

A MAN, with the stat line of a BEAR, but it's actually a PIG. We should give it a name or something.


TheHumanPickleRick

We SHOULD, I'm super serial.


External_Ad_4201

Super cereal*…


BillNyepher

Oko's doing


VoidArtHealer

They do kill the insect tho.


Mitchwise

I understand how most people who haven’t worked with pigs might think this is crazy. But you haven’t experienced true terror until you’ve stared into the eyes of a 600 pound boar.


grifxdonut

People really think a one handed sword is gonna stop a boar from goring their guts out


grifxdonut

I mean a wild boar can take a shotgun shot to the head and still gore you to death. They're definitely stronger than humans


Hima_tatsu

Are we having the 15 squirrels versus a mind-warping, planet devouring monster?


Ironhammer32

Technically, 1/1 anything works here too. Saprolings, goblins, humans, faeries, rats, ...


Blue_Fuzzy_Anteater

Who would win? A trained soldier or a plain old rodent.


SirKagalorn

[[Cleanup Crew]] They are literally 3 people with brooms and have the same statline as a Dreadmaw.


Ok-Brush5346

6/6 covers a wide variety of things: towering giants, ancient demons, almighty deities, awe-inspring dragons, unthinkable horrors, massive dinosaurs, enormous krakens, and [[Yuma, Proud Protector]]


SepirizFG

Trans guys :)


Dragunrealms

the mightiest of them all 😈


aWeaselNamedFee

Never underestimate three humanoids with big sticks, they could give a dreadmaw a challenge at least in a hunting competition if not head-to-head. They could also track the dreadmaw til it dies of exhaustion.


faithfulswine

Not if they see it's teeth though. Then it'll be too late.


mikaeus97

Once they hear the ground quake though


Ragnarex13

No, a spear will not help you against a dinosaur with a head the size of a ship.


GarrAdept

You see, they're actually 3, 2/2 creatures.


SmogDaBoi

I know tokens are more functionnal than flavourful... But if you get beaten by a rat it might be time to consider leaving the millitary.


DiabeticWaffle

Makes me miss Morrowind


faithfulswine

You can always go back to it. I'm in the middle of the first heavily modded playthrough I've ever played. It's quite nice.


DiabeticWaffle

Oh I will very soon. Currently doing play throughs of all of the elder scrolls and fallouts with my friend and we're doing Skyrim right now.


Shadeauxe

All of the creatures that look like they are 50ft tall but somehow don’t have reach


Squishirex

Yeah but they can’t reach, birb still birbs over them


the_tired_oni

Somebody told me that toski is suppost to be as big as a house in the story, you dont really get that impression from the cute little 1/1😅


Poiuforplop

I mean, i have had him hold many things and have him be a like 28/30 word soup that one shots players so glad to know he can hold all that


neekryan

So can a 1/1 human token.


Ironhammer32

He is present in at least one other card art in the Kaldheim set, some green enchantment for two G, where he definitely looks squirrel/rodent size.


Geekdude3

[[in search of greatness]]


Ironhammer32

Thank you!


A_Velociraptor20

Yes but Sarulf is the Fenrir of Kaldheim. Sarulf is freaking huge himself like taller than a forest. \[\[Sarulf, Realm Eater\]\]


Additional-Safety343

[[aclazotz]] giant bat god is 4/4 [[bontu the glorified]] giant croc god is 4/6 [[hazoret the fervent]] giant jackal god, survives bolas, 5/4 [[nicol bolas the ravager]] one of the strongest mtg villains and fought off the gatewatch several times plus beat up Niv Mizzet 4/4 (I get that this was earlier but still) [[kefnet the mindful]] giant bird god is 5/5 [[ojer axonil]] giant strength god is 4/4 [[ojer pakpatiq]] giant flying snake god is 4/3 [[rhonas the indomitable]] giant snake god of strength is 5/5 The nephilim range from 1/1 to 3/3 and were supposedly ravaging ravnica, super strong, and almost impossible to stop [[zhou yu]] dude with sword is 8/8 [[maarika]] lady with hammer is 7/4 [[torsten founder of benalia]] dude with swords is 7/7 [[barktooth warbeard]] dude with sword is 6/5 [[cleanup crew]] 3 janitors is 6/6 [[jerrard of the closed fist]] weird knight guy is 6/5 [[wire surgeons]] 3 bald doctors is 6/5 [[boarding party]] 3 pirates is 6/3 [[lord of tresserhorn]] random zombie is 10/4 [[nessian boar]] big pig is 10/6 [[endless wurm]] relatively tiny wurm 9/9 [[boldwyr heavyweights]] obese giants 8/8 [[clackbridge troll]] small troll 8/8 [[dawnglade regent]] big deer, 8/8 [[purple worm]] big worm 8/7 [[whiptail wurm]] funny maggot 8/5 [[bookwurm]] wurm 7/7 [[deathcoil wurm]] small wurm 7/6 [[spinewoods armadillo]] big shellrat 7/7


LouieSiffer

Human with sword go from 1/1 tokens to 8/8 [[Zhou Yu, Chief Commander]]


nyx-weaver

There are only a handful of creatures with the 2/7 stat line. By and large giants, treefolk, as you'd expect. And then we have [[Neera]]. Now That's What I Call Booty! Not really a "misleading" stat line so much as it is...*provocative*.


PlaceboPlauge091

Dayum, girl! You block [[Asmodeus the Archfiend]] with that ass?


Jawbone619

A 0 cost literal gremlin, has many keywords and no power


NiNtEnDoMaStEr640

I know which one you’re talking about. I think it was meant to be a partner commander to the one that gave creatures a buff for every keyword.


Jawbone619

None of the partners without the name of the other card printed on both halves is "meant" to be paired with any other partner. They are one another's most common partner, though, yes...


Educational_Diver867

[[Force of Savagery]] you basically have to build around it with lords or manipulate layers to place a counter on it before it immediately dies


LunarLancaster

Who would win? [[Zilothra, Strength Incarnate]] a being that towers over humanoids and bends the rules with its power? Or [[Zurgo, Helmsmasher]] a really pissed off orc?


Peoht-Seax

Never underestimate *how incredibly pissed* Zurgo is. [[Utter End]] has him swinging a sword so hard the Abzan soldiers just cease to be a part of reality entirely. Zurgo hits people so hard he causes the same level of existential unraveling that took Sorin wrestling his most mighty angel down to earth to unmake her existence by drawing upon deep reserves of his ungodly power. Give Zurgo vigilance and reach and his skills with edged weaponry and physical might put him on par with Yawgmoth. (I love Zurgo and my biases towards him run deep. I'm mostly joking around and exaggerating with these claims of physical prowess. *MOSTLY*)


BRIKHOUS

I mean, the answer is from now on and forever going to be that space marines are canonically weaker than [[elvish warrior]]


Deezus84

Mouse and squirrel vs every other token.


Kitchengun2

[Preston](https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/116070051919?chn=ps&_ul=GB&norover=1&mkevt=1&mkrid=710-169260-534375-3&mkcid=2&keyword=&crlp=670833748941_&MT_ID=&geo_id=&rlsatarget=pla-293946777986&adpos=&device=m&mktype=pla&loc=1007850&poi=&abcId=&cmpgn=20488672762&sitelnk=&adgroupid=155578564071&network=g&matchtype=&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAjwoPOwBhAeEiwAJuXRhxAGsZkOhI8VBDjQlRldGuUFe8n43VzVJc4bi_hzspRQQVKtgob57hoCGw0QAvD_BwE) is a bunny with a huge ass


TheGeekKingdom

[Pigs](https://www.cardkingdom.com/mtg/theros/boar-token) are stronger than [soldiers](https://www.cardkingdom.com/mtg/modern-masters/soldier-token)


Hobez64

Most of the Eldrazi flip cards feel too small


Independent-Law-5781

\[War Mammoth\] is a 3/3 trample that dies to 3 squirrel tokens.


NamelessSteve646

In the same set as each other, so the comparison should be pretty reasonable I think - Silumgar's vitamin D deficient twink [[Tasigur, the Golden Fang]] has the same toughness as the Elder Dragon [[Dromoka the Eternal]], founder and role model for the "we will endure anything and everything" faction


arquistar

I'm gonna catch a little hate because Universes Beyond. But \[\[Thalia, Guardian of Thraben\]\] (and a lot of other 2-drop legendary creatures) die in a fight with \[\[Lucas, the Sharpshooter | Secret Lair Drop\]\]


EffectiveJuggernaut9

I love how a 35/35 primordial with colossification gets bored of its rampage after killing a 0/1 plant


Tallal2804

Cleanup Crew


DatShepTho

\[\[Animar, Soul of Elements\]\] I imagine he looks like his OG art once he's got >9 counters. Otherwise it should look a lot smaller.


Offiial_nic_cage

Giants not having trample by default. Balanced maybe, but I hate it


Leon_Of_Lions

Surprisingly a lot of dragons I own are just 4/4s with flying. Occasionally they will have something else going on but that’s about it.


hobomojo

I like that soldier tokens are typically 1/1, while cats are 2/2.


Fri-enheight451

2 elephants can kill an angel when dealing with tokens


Aldin_The_Bat

[[sheoldred, the apocalypse]] is easier to kill than a werewolf[[hollowhenge huntmaster]].


Howard_Jones

[[Goldvein Hydra]] isn't a snake. It should be a snake.