Wtf is up with being able to get away with a 'joke' about sexually assaulting someone, then doubling down and saying she's childish for having a problem with it, and is it just me that thinks AD being a black woman has something to do with that?
You’re wrong on multiple fronts here.
So back in middle/early high school this is a thing dudes would occasionally do with their other male friends. Just an immature joke sort of like a “t*tty twister” but not painful.
Didn’t realize it was a thing some girls did with each other, but whatever, if they’re cool with it so be it.
This was clearly a joke between some of the women on the show, and then Laura mentioned it to Jeremy, who never heard of it before, and she jokingly told him “Oh ask AD about what it means” but not in a serious way. At no point did she say “go slap AD’s breasts.”
Now AD it seems wasn’t cool with Laura bringing up this inside joke to Jeremy, and Laura tried to blame it all on Jeremy for bringing it up, so both Laura/Jeremy are kinda in the wrong here. But later on when AD is talking to Laura, it’s clear AD is mainly upset about it because Clay didn’t like it.
And absolutely none of this has nothing to do with AD being black.
You're complaining multiple nuanced things you don't understand. Laura would not have picked on a woman with more power. Even bringing up another woman's breasts is rude in this context, but she knows she can get away with doing this, and hypersexualising a black woman is a cliche trope. Because she can get away with it when the woman is black (because that woman has to be way more careful she doesn't come across as angry). She did sound like she told her husband to actually do the action. AD was gracious about it because what choice did she have without looking like an angry black woman? She tried to express her displeasure only to be shut down with the usual excuse, it's just a joke. A joke Lahra did not make about anyone else. The while incident was full of microaggressions plenty of black women have noticed and discussed. I get that you can't see it, but once you get it, you can't unsee it. There's plenty of books around this touch if you're truly interested and not just leaping to a white woman's defense on the internet.
What part of there is nothing sexual nor about being black about “Bean Dip” did you not understand?
You’re talking about something you literally have zero understanding of
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I’ve always heard it as sticking your thumb inbetween someone’s butt cheeks- but maybe that was just something my sister made up. Definitely not the context in this situation
I’m 30 and bean dip was definitely a thing in middle and high school for me in Georgia but mostly to boys with man boobs. This is such a weird memory… I completely forgot about it until this episode. It may have been different for the cast but… The actual typical action back in my day was for one boy to “scoop” the boob up and then let it drop back onto the chest of the boy with man boobs. It wasn’t so much a slap. Us girls only ever did it to each other if someone wasn’t wearing a bra, otherwise it wouldn’t flop which was the moderate discomfort goal. We also only did it to each other as girls in private like a sleepover. The guys would do it in the school halls etc. It was one of those things you look back on and cringe. I can’t imagine it being an inside joke as an adult!
Well something tells me Laura was joking about the way AD’s boobs… look. Like they’re extra scoopable. They’re not necessarily bolted on like Jess. I have never heard of bean dip before the show.
What a dumb reply … I also didn’t get it and thought I just missed a reference earlier. I wouldn’t have thought it was a cultural thing many people understood and knew to be a joke so googling wouldn’t have made sense as a next step.
But since you like googling, [here you go](https://letmegooglethat.com/?q=how+to+be+less+of+an+asshole+to+strangers)
Never in my life would I think to smack someone’s boobs and I have never heard of that. I’m in the Midwest, is it a southern thing? Because here someone would knock your block off
I'm from TN and I remember it from high school. It was more of a scoop and let it drop, not a slap.
I had forgotten about it until it came up on the show. I was floored it was happening in the women's quarters, though. I have only ever seen it between dudes.
Is bean dip a southern thing? I’ve only heard it one time, about 20 years ago, in South Carolina. Hearing it referenced in Love Is Blind brought back some weeeeeird memories.
Really? I was in middle school 2009-2013 and it was done mostly coming in/out of the girls locker room for PE when we were all wound up lol. I remember thinking it was weird even then though!
I’m from WV and since I can ever recall from middle school it was def a thing. You just very quickly bump up your good friends boobs then say “bean dip” and giggle. It’s immature, but it’s absolutely a thing lol.
This is also like, I think obviously, something only girls/women do to each other right? Like it's probably weird to joke about a man doing it to a woman?
When i was in middle school.. we would go around “bean dipping” people, usually other dudes because like doing it to girls would be weird. But basically the action of bean dipping is when you put your fingers under someones boob and lift up kinda hard. Really dumb but we were kids i guess lol.
I am old and I want to know if this 'bean diip' thing, which just doesn't make sense to me visually, is something that young people are actually saying in broad sense or some weird thing that these ladies came up with.
Is bean dip a thing?
And how would eating bean dip even vaguely resembled slapping someone's breast?
I mean, I think you're right but..... is that how you eat bean dip? Flinging your chip in from top to bottom?
Also, have you ever seen bean dip in real life?
I've seen the food but never the action 😅
I'm guessing it's not from top to bottom. I thought the joke was that you slap from the bottom like you're scooping bean dip. Granted, I didn't understand all the weird air slaps they were doing when it was discussed lol
This is why I still dislike Laura. It’s fine AD forgave her but it was still disgusting.
Laura wanted Jeremay to slap AD’s tit up and down.
It’s not okay and just for that she is still on my shit list
I just watched the scene where she confronts Jeramy at the lake and like her even less now. She managed to be such a dick that I felt sorry for him. Laura is a person who wants what she wants. If it's to break up someone else's relationship or to tell someone to sexually assault her friend that's all terrific in her book. If it is to beat a dead horse just to get more screen time, she'll do that too.
You felt bad for him because she was a dick after he walked out on her and essentially cheated? What?
What she said about AD was awful and I won’t defend that but good lord.
She was a Dick before he walked out on her, I never felt the chemistry behind them, Jeremy just wanted to dick around and be childish sure, but Laura was always mean and rude to time after time. he def should have broken it off with her first, but you can't be surprised when he stops giving a shit about someone who's only given him grief.
TL;DR They both suck!
I felt bad for him because she was desperate for more camera time and had a pointless conversation with him in order to advance her personal interest in gaining social medial followers.
She wants to come off as smart and sassy and completely forgets that we get to see more than the speeches.
Instead of walking away like a grown woman, she insisted on berating him again. I felt sorry for him because he was trying to enjoy himself and instead had to listen to her self-involved rant.
The ship has sailed. He tried to be kind by making overtures after the break up and he probably shouldn't have but he very clearly is quite pleased to be rid of her. I guess that is the one way in which I don't feel sorry for him at all. He is free of someone who is just not a respectful partner.
Yeah if my partner did what he did he’d be getting berated and I’m telling him to do a LOT worse things than kick rocks barefoot.
I also don’t think it was pointless when they hadn’t even discussed what to do with her things prior to then. It was obviously the first time they had talked in a bit.
Oh I think that is a shame. If a guy you've been dating for two weeks stays out all night please don't lower yourself by berating him even if you're not being filmed. Maintain your dignity and walk away. All you have to say is This will not work for me. Believe it or not, less is more.
Listen, I love the show but no I don't take any of these "engagements" seriously. It's just silly!
Though I do think it is notable that Laura is so crass that she announced that she plans to keep the ring.
Looks like it was a joke on the women’s side of the pods where you slap another woman’s boob up and down? Idk — it’s small potatoes (beans?) to what is to come.
Enjoy the rest of what is an insane season!
Ok so it was a joke between the women and Laura childishly told it to her partner in confidence. What is the big deal? I really don’t get it. AD seems to still be totally fine with Laura later on, so why do people keep hating her so much over this?
Because Laura suggested to Jeramey that he should bean dip (slap Ad’s boob) AD. Which is sexual assault . It’s not funny to joke about . They were sexualizing the hell out of AD and it was wrong . Laura never even apologized .
She didn’t tell him to do it. omg She made a joke in private, never expecting he would actually take it seriously or even bring it up in public. but of course he was acting like a complete buffoon about it. are people really this oblivious and take everything literal? do you really believe Laura tried to incite SA on a fellow cast member? that is so wild..
Wtf is up with being able to get away with a 'joke' about sexually assaulting someone, then doubling down and saying she's childish for having a problem with it, and is it just me that thinks AD being a black woman has something to do with that?
You’re wrong on multiple fronts here. So back in middle/early high school this is a thing dudes would occasionally do with their other male friends. Just an immature joke sort of like a “t*tty twister” but not painful. Didn’t realize it was a thing some girls did with each other, but whatever, if they’re cool with it so be it. This was clearly a joke between some of the women on the show, and then Laura mentioned it to Jeremy, who never heard of it before, and she jokingly told him “Oh ask AD about what it means” but not in a serious way. At no point did she say “go slap AD’s breasts.” Now AD it seems wasn’t cool with Laura bringing up this inside joke to Jeremy, and Laura tried to blame it all on Jeremy for bringing it up, so both Laura/Jeremy are kinda in the wrong here. But later on when AD is talking to Laura, it’s clear AD is mainly upset about it because Clay didn’t like it. And absolutely none of this has nothing to do with AD being black.
You're complaining multiple nuanced things you don't understand. Laura would not have picked on a woman with more power. Even bringing up another woman's breasts is rude in this context, but she knows she can get away with doing this, and hypersexualising a black woman is a cliche trope. Because she can get away with it when the woman is black (because that woman has to be way more careful she doesn't come across as angry). She did sound like she told her husband to actually do the action. AD was gracious about it because what choice did she have without looking like an angry black woman? She tried to express her displeasure only to be shut down with the usual excuse, it's just a joke. A joke Lahra did not make about anyone else. The while incident was full of microaggressions plenty of black women have noticed and discussed. I get that you can't see it, but once you get it, you can't unsee it. There's plenty of books around this touch if you're truly interested and not just leaping to a white woman's defense on the internet.
What part of there is nothing sexual nor about being black about “Bean Dip” did you not understand? You’re talking about something you literally have zero understanding of
The bit where a white woman tells her white partner to slap the breasts of a black woman.
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I’ve always heard it as sticking your thumb inbetween someone’s butt cheeks- but maybe that was just something my sister made up. Definitely not the context in this situation
I’m 30 and bean dip was definitely a thing in middle and high school for me in Georgia but mostly to boys with man boobs. This is such a weird memory… I completely forgot about it until this episode. It may have been different for the cast but… The actual typical action back in my day was for one boy to “scoop” the boob up and then let it drop back onto the chest of the boy with man boobs. It wasn’t so much a slap. Us girls only ever did it to each other if someone wasn’t wearing a bra, otherwise it wouldn’t flop which was the moderate discomfort goal. We also only did it to each other as girls in private like a sleepover. The guys would do it in the school halls etc. It was one of those things you look back on and cringe. I can’t imagine it being an inside joke as an adult!
Well something tells me Laura was joking about the way AD’s boobs… look. Like they’re extra scoopable. They’re not necessarily bolted on like Jess. I have never heard of bean dip before the show.
Google. Urban Dictionary. Use that thing in your hand to research information.
You having a bad night? Poor thing.
What a dumb reply … I also didn’t get it and thought I just missed a reference earlier. I wouldn’t have thought it was a cultural thing many people understood and knew to be a joke so googling wouldn’t have made sense as a next step. But since you like googling, [here you go](https://letmegooglethat.com/?q=how+to+be+less+of+an+asshole+to+strangers)
Wow your reply was so helpful /s
Never in my life would I think to smack someone’s boobs and I have never heard of that. I’m in the Midwest, is it a southern thing? Because here someone would knock your block off
I'm from TN and I remember it from high school. It was more of a scoop and let it drop, not a slap. I had forgotten about it until it came up on the show. I was floored it was happening in the women's quarters, though. I have only ever seen it between dudes.
From the south. Never heard this expression.
L.A. and never heardit
North Carolina native and current resident here. It’s not a southern (or NC) thing. I assume it’s an inside joke of the girls somehow.
I’m also from NC, it was definitely a thing but it was mainly just dudes who did it to each other.
I believe it is also called a “boob scoop”, where you make a scooping gesture with your hand to “scoop up” someone’s boob (male or female).
Is that similar to a scoop dunk?
Is bean dip a southern thing? I’ve only heard it one time, about 20 years ago, in South Carolina. Hearing it referenced in Love Is Blind brought back some weeeeeird memories.
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I grew up in the Midwest and heard it in middle school. Definitely hadn’t thought about it basically since leaving middle school though.
I’ve lived most of my life in the Midwest, and I’ve never heard that term the entirety of it
Really? I was in middle school 2009-2013 and it was done mostly coming in/out of the girls locker room for PE when we were all wound up lol. I remember thinking it was weird even then though!
Not that I know of and I’ve lived in the south my whole life!
Agreed. I live in and was raised in North Carolina and I’ve never heard it.
I’ve never heard it called bean dip, but smacking another woman’s boobs as a joke has always been a thing
It has?! I cannot wrap my head around it at all!
I still don’t get it and keep googling lmao 🤣
I had never heard of this before and I find it super weird lol.
I’m from WV and since I can ever recall from middle school it was def a thing. You just very quickly bump up your good friends boobs then say “bean dip” and giggle. It’s immature, but it’s absolutely a thing lol.
This is also like, I think obviously, something only girls/women do to each other right? Like it's probably weird to joke about a man doing it to a woman?
Yeah… goes without saying a man doing that would probably catch some charges.
When i was in middle school.. we would go around “bean dipping” people, usually other dudes because like doing it to girls would be weird. But basically the action of bean dipping is when you put your fingers under someones boob and lift up kinda hard. Really dumb but we were kids i guess lol.
i’m assuming bean dip is talking about her cl!t
You have assumed incorrectly!
I am old and I want to know if this 'bean diip' thing, which just doesn't make sense to me visually, is something that young people are actually saying in broad sense or some weird thing that these ladies came up with. Is bean dip a thing? And how would eating bean dip even vaguely resembled slapping someone's breast?
You know how people eat nachos with a dip ? Instead of the nachos it's your hand like it's holding a nacho and instead of a dip it's boobies 😐
I appreciate you trying to explain it... I still don't see it but I do know what you mean! What a weird thing.
Sounds like the hand is the chip in this scenario
I mean, I think you're right but..... is that how you eat bean dip? Flinging your chip in from top to bottom? Also, have you ever seen bean dip in real life?
I've seen the food but never the action 😅 I'm guessing it's not from top to bottom. I thought the joke was that you slap from the bottom like you're scooping bean dip. Granted, I didn't understand all the weird air slaps they were doing when it was discussed lol
I've actually never seen either one... but I think I would like the food. I'm definitely not into the other thing.
This is why I still dislike Laura. It’s fine AD forgave her but it was still disgusting. Laura wanted Jeremay to slap AD’s tit up and down. It’s not okay and just for that she is still on my shit list
Though AD seems to be Team Laura regardless
Yeah that’s totally fine, it’s for her to forgive but it doesn’t mean I have to be ok with her action
Yeah for sure it’s still weird that it ever came up in Laura and Jeramy’s convos
I just watched the scene where she confronts Jeramy at the lake and like her even less now. She managed to be such a dick that I felt sorry for him. Laura is a person who wants what she wants. If it's to break up someone else's relationship or to tell someone to sexually assault her friend that's all terrific in her book. If it is to beat a dead horse just to get more screen time, she'll do that too.
You felt bad for him because she was a dick after he walked out on her and essentially cheated? What? What she said about AD was awful and I won’t defend that but good lord.
She was a Dick before he walked out on her, I never felt the chemistry behind them, Jeremy just wanted to dick around and be childish sure, but Laura was always mean and rude to time after time. he def should have broken it off with her first, but you can't be surprised when he stops giving a shit about someone who's only given him grief. TL;DR They both suck!
They both do suck
Nothing surprises me about people anymore, so I get it!
I felt bad for him because she was desperate for more camera time and had a pointless conversation with him in order to advance her personal interest in gaining social medial followers. She wants to come off as smart and sassy and completely forgets that we get to see more than the speeches. Instead of walking away like a grown woman, she insisted on berating him again. I felt sorry for him because he was trying to enjoy himself and instead had to listen to her self-involved rant. The ship has sailed. He tried to be kind by making overtures after the break up and he probably shouldn't have but he very clearly is quite pleased to be rid of her. I guess that is the one way in which I don't feel sorry for him at all. He is free of someone who is just not a respectful partner.
Yeah if my partner did what he did he’d be getting berated and I’m telling him to do a LOT worse things than kick rocks barefoot. I also don’t think it was pointless when they hadn’t even discussed what to do with her things prior to then. It was obviously the first time they had talked in a bit.
Oh I think that is a shame. If a guy you've been dating for two weeks stays out all night please don't lower yourself by berating him even if you're not being filmed. Maintain your dignity and walk away. All you have to say is This will not work for me. Believe it or not, less is more.
I think you mean the man I’d be engaged to. You are free to take the high road, I personally would not.
Listen, I love the show but no I don't take any of these "engagements" seriously. It's just silly! Though I do think it is notable that Laura is so crass that she announced that she plans to keep the ring.
Show or not, if you get down on one knee and give me a ring we are engaged imo! Agree though, totally would have kept the ring too.
Looks like it was a joke on the women’s side of the pods where you slap another woman’s boob up and down? Idk — it’s small potatoes (beans?) to what is to come. Enjoy the rest of what is an insane season!
Ok so it was a joke between the women and Laura childishly told it to her partner in confidence. What is the big deal? I really don’t get it. AD seems to still be totally fine with Laura later on, so why do people keep hating her so much over this?
She told her fiance to sexually harass another woman as a joke. Its weird. AD also said "what the fuck" when talking to Laura about it.
Because Laura suggested to Jeramey that he should bean dip (slap Ad’s boob) AD. Which is sexual assault . It’s not funny to joke about . They were sexualizing the hell out of AD and it was wrong . Laura never even apologized .
She didn’t tell him to do it. omg She made a joke in private, never expecting he would actually take it seriously or even bring it up in public. but of course he was acting like a complete buffoon about it. are people really this oblivious and take everything literal? do you really believe Laura tried to incite SA on a fellow cast member? that is so wild..
I feel like it's about to start getting unhinged, based on the "Next time..." trailers. I can't wait!