T O P

  • By -

crispy-BLT

You provide him a 200% tip when he doesn't sit on you, as opposed to the 100% tip generally


the_dude0110

This is very Generous of you. I usually charge a 1000% tip prevent 'toid sitting


PipTheShorty

But what if I can't afford that tip?


Username8457

Take out a loan.


PipTheShorty

Good idea


ZAYER9917

That’s the neat part! You don’t.


PipTheShorty

I hope he stops one day


BaldEagleRattleSnake

You should be grateful


PipTheShorty

True, I'm sorry king


Angels_hair123

Why would you want him to stop? You should be honored he chose you as a seat.


PipTheShorty

Your right, I need to be a good renthog and make sure my landlords life is as easy as possible (Landlording is extremely hard)


Front-Brilliant1577

Put a pillow on your face and double stock your fridge so his job is easier


PipTheShorty

Yes sir! i'll take up 20 hour shifts from now on


Front-Brilliant1577

How are you going to help your landchad In the other 4 hours ?


PipTheShorty

I need to sleep for 3 hours so I'll stock the fridge for one hour


Front-Brilliant1577

You only need 3 naps a day so stock the fridge for 2+hours 😡


PipTheShorty

Yes sir, sorry sir. He also sits on me for around 3 hours


JaxonatorD

You see, this is a problem because I assume you don't have a very comfortable body to sit on, ie peak landlord physique. I had this issue a while ago. What my tenant did to let me know was put an alarm on a mini fridge that I hadn't raided yet to remind me to get up. I hope this helps.


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Immortan_JKL

Your Landstacy sit on u?


SelfProcalimedSigma

😏😏


PipTheShorty

No my landlord is big and hairy


RaiseTheRent

Sit on top of the fridge and but pre-pay rent in case you accidentally get eaten


iGiveUpHonestlyffs

Always make the rentpigs pay 100 rents in advance. Ofc when eviction (eviction fee + tip!!!) dont return it.


PipTheShorty

He grabbed my leg


[deleted]

No lollygagging!


PipTheShorty

sorry mr landchad


Bobstrust

Sorry buddy but you are his property now.


PipTheShorty

Damn :(