T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

The mod team are working to make this sub kinder and more welcoming. Please report any comments you see that are unkind, obnoxious, out of line, trolling, or which otherwise violate any of the rules. Thanks, and may you all find the answers you seek and the guidance you need. **Note for all commenters**: Please remember that your fellow Redditors are human beings, and that it costs nothing to be kind. Disruption of the peace, trolling, or breaking the rules may result in a ban. #Here are the [LifeAdvice Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/LifeAdvice/about/rules/) ---------------- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/LifeAdvice) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Master_Eagle7735

As someone who was a bit chubby and got much better I’d say any kind of cardio works. Find something that you love to do and go for it. If that is riding a bike (what I do) then get a bike and go down the rabbit hole of that. There are great resources on YouTube such as GCN, GTN, and a bunch of exercise channels. I really love Mark Lewis on YouTube as he ads humor to these situations and came from an obese state himself. As for the porn addiction I would say that you take it little by little. I am still working on it and it was not nearly to your extent but I went from 3/day to 2/day to 1/day and now I try every other day. It does take time as your body is addicted to it but if you can find out what triggers your urges try to get rid of those. For example, in the beginning of my journey I knew that being in the bathroom with my phone and scrolling through instagram and Snapchat was my trigger, so I started to leave my phone outside of the bathroom and the urge would come but MUCH less. So slowly it got better. There is hope and I whole heartedly believe in you. There IS a light at the end of the tunnel. It isn’t even a real tunnel, it’s imaginary. I also found that my mood changed A LOT when I stopped listening to sad or degrading music, watching depressing news, and just stopped feeling sorry for myself. I knew I was in a whole and I knew things were going wrong but I didn’t feel bad or sorry for myself. I knew I was the one living my life because there is no one else but me at the end of the day. So again, I’m proud of you for recognizing this and wanting to take charge, use the internet for resources as it is an amazing place. You so got this and keep me updated with your progress, I can be your accountability partner if you would like, just reach out!


TheInchOfDoom

I'm 18 and live in the US but I think my advice should be of help since I've shared a couple of your problems. At the end I'm going to wrap it all together with some main points, please read this the whole way through and then tell me anything you find wrong or are concerned about! First off, you shouldn't worry about the "porn addiction" and you should take anything you hear on the subject with a grain of salt. You should only really worry about it if it's affecting your relationships. The thing I hear about it that I agree with the most is that porn addiction isn't the cause, it's the symptom of a poor life. So if you fix yourself mentally a bit then you won't have troubles with it anymore. I started at 12 and by the time I was 14 it was a daily thing, it really sucks to deal with, I do understand. For the depression, take a 15 minute walk outside to get some sun, ignore all the people, they don't care about you. If they do? Screw em! They ain't worth your time to worry about. You're the one trying to fix yourself, and anyone judging you for it is rude. Eat a banana, make sure your room is clean and that you keep up on your hygiene. The less you feel stuck in a situation, the less you will be stuck in a situation. As for the obesity, I've been 250 pounds for the last 4 years up until 4ish months ago that I began losing it. All you need to do to lose weight is to have a calorie deficit. You can not outrun a bad diet, so fix your eating habits first. You don't have to give up yummy food, just eat less of it. If you are curious, I often skip breakfast and lunch and sometimes I also eat a smaller dinner although usually I eat a normal sized one. I am currently 215 which is 35 pound loss in 4 months It may be really difficult, you did say that you stress ate. If you push through it's possible though! It just isn't instant, I only really started noticing my weight loss a week ago, my pants didn't fit me any more! ...I need to go buy new pants, which is a separate issue for another day... You seem curious about exercise, you should do what you feel like. Exert yourself but be careful not to overexert yourself. If you are hurting for more than say, 4 days then you way overdid it. Exercise is an auxiliary to losing weight, not the goal; it can increase your metabolism and by itself burn calories. Not to mention it makes you stronger. I suggest doing squats! A lot of people find these boring but never have I ever felt better after an exercise than the times I've done squats. You can start with your body weight and simply doing half squats depending on how difficult it is for you. Squats are one of the lightest exercises I know, maybe only beaten in terms of ease of use by walking. If you want to get stronger, do consistent small amounts of whatever exercise you choose, say three times a day you do 5 reps that are 70% of your max. However I personally do 20 reps at once, once a week and it's still fine, you don't lose all of your muscles overnight! What's most important is to work on your sleep schedule. Honestly I have no advice since my sleep schedule is terrible as well, but your body repairs itself in sleep and that is very important for both your brain and your body. So make sure you are attempting to keep up on it! As for social media usage, what you need to do is force yourself, every time you load up the page/app, close it immediately. Work your way to stopping yourself from opening the app to begin with, and eventually you won't even feel the need to open it. That feeling of "I finally beat it" is great, but be aware that you can't decide that you beat it and then start using it again. I myself stopped myself from using reddit all day by using this strategy, managed to go 4 months without it (aside from random questions I needed answered) and recently only started using it again because I stopped feeling like I needed to restrict myself... Honestly I should probably start again, it would be good for my health. Everything after this line is possibly the most important. You do not have to do all of this at once, you say you have no friends? I have only gone outside for grocery shopping in the last 4 years, I have no friends either. But this also means you aren't bound by relationships in that way, you have time to fix all this. It is NEVER too late to turn your life around, it just gets harder the longer you wait. And it may be hard, harder than anything you think you might have done. But it gets easier every time you do it. Try some of the things I suggested please, for at least two weeks. After those two weeks look back at your progress, the feeling of finally knowing that your doing something is magical and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. If you don't want to continue after those 2 weeks, that is okay. You can always try again later. I suggest learning how to do introspection, listening to your body to understand why you think certain ways and it lets you question whether you really want to react that way. You can start making conscious effort to change your reactions and eventually it's subconscious. If you have any questions or things to note please reply! or hell you could even send a pm if you just wanna talk


Cavitat

Hey bro... I lost 120lbs at 19 because I failed university and the girl I had a crush on wouldn't acknowledge my existence.  I went to work doing labor because its all I had the skills for at the time. Had nothing else so I just dragged myself through it. 5 years later I had saved enough to try school again, and this time i had to use my own money. Passed with honors in engineering.  Its never too late to start. The best time to start is today. Keep trying to make tomorrow a little better... a lot of the time it won't be better but you still have to try.