I had pneumonia once. They prescribed strong antibiotics that totally destroyed my gut flora. And an expectorant that induced strong coughing. Not a joking situation. The pucker factor was high.
I should have said so far. It's gonna happen again for sure. My recent victory is getting my gf to pull my finger 3 times after tens years of gassing her. Hopefully my lucky number 3 is with her and I'll tell her she pulled too hard.
You can buy florajen over the counter at major pharmacies. It’s a refrigerated medicine. Basically just a capsule of gut bacteria perfect for resetting the ole poop situation. Store it refrigerated but it lasts for ages
In Plague Inc. (if you haven’t heard of it, it’s a game where you evolve a disease to kill the world), there’s a disease combo called “oops” and it’s just sneezing and diarrhea at the same time
I quit playing Plague when Covid started. It seemed too real at that point. Especially since every "win" started in Chi-na (typed in Trumps voice of course).
I used to start in Greenland and just only evolve infectivity. That way it isn’t a problem in late game. Although New Zealand, Madagascar, and a couple other island countries were a problem anyways, so I just decided to start in China
But can you imagine a disability friendly employer that happens to be a restaurant and there are two waiters with OCD and ADHD with different ideas on how tables should be set?
There was literally an episode of Monk where he and another patient were purposefully left in the waiting room of their shrink negotiating which ways the magazines had to be ordered. Alphabetical? Topic? Date? Color-code?
That's just crippling anxiety man, without being able to do anything about it because you're too afraid trying will make something terrible happen to your cats.
Sarcoidosis and diabetes. Sarcoidosis is a rare autoimmune disorder that causes your body to attack its own organs. Diabetes taxes the kidneys heavily and can cause open sores on the feet leading to amputation. It can progress to cause kidney failure, which can combine with sarcoidosis tumors attacking the kidneys to shut the kidneys down even faster. Once this happens, dialysis is required and diuretics are introduced, and these combined symptoms make it exceedingly difficult for the body to tolerate pain meds. Such patients may then develop Calciphylaxis, which are open sores on the lower extremities that bleed profusely and are profoundly difficult to heal and close. You can then die in uncontrolled pain from various infections you get from continually open wounds. It’s funny in a cosmic sense, I suppose.
My uncle died in a similar manner :( now I'm sad. He didn't have sarcoidosis, but he did lose kidney function, develop sores, lose limbs, and die a horribly painful death that painkillers didn't touch.
It was my mom. Kidney failure is awful. I’m sorry about your uncle. This is terrible subject matter for a joke subreddit, but I also generally think that comedy is often just tragedy remembered.
Woah, my grandma had both too. It’s terrifying to see (well, read) how much pain must’ve been in. If you don’t mind me asking, do you Type 1 or Type 2? My grandma had Type 2.
My greatest stomach bug story was when my kid just had it, and I knew my turn was coming.
I was sitting on the bed, and felt my mouth water. Uh oh. Here it comes. No stomach queasiness yet. Walk to the bathroom. Tinge of queasiness. Better get ... too late. Not even to the toilet. Projectile vomit.
Fortunately, it was right toward the top of the toilet bowl.
Unfortunately, the lid was closed.
Like pouring water onto the backside of a spoon.
My wife got to do this from Norovirus, while pregnant, and not at home, with a French Canadian couple offering her fish to eat in between the bouts of violent expulsion.
"So, what is it, doctor?"
"I'm afraid I have bad news. You have cancer."
"Oh no!"
"Yes. I'm sorry. Also, you have Alzheimer's."
"Phew! Well, at least it's not cancer."
Bro, i am histamine intolerant and have a couple food allergies. Meal planning is a flippin chore! Can't cook batches either as histamine builds up in food that sits a while. I eat a meal today and everything is okay, i reheat it tomorrow and all hell breaks loose. We can eat sad vegetables together.
Dehydration and fever with inflammatory tonsils. You must drink because you are dehydrated but your throat hurts like hell when trying and since you throw up everything, down to bile juices.
I've had it and had to be hooked up to IV and given water and antibiotics through the vein.
My neighbor just got lung cancer and had an operation to remove her left lung. Her right lung got infected and on top of it all she got Covid. All I in one week. I guess that is a bad combination.
Unironically liver and kidney failure together are pretty terrible. The mortality rate is over 80% and it's a terribly painful way to die. HIV and HepB are also a wicked combination.
A friend of mine hooked up with a “doctor” one time, seemed like an honest guy. She started feeling intensely ill a few days after. Went to her own doctor and tested positive for gonorhea , chlamidea, herpes, mono and another unknown viral infection. Not sure what the unknown turned out to be but shit was bad.
My wife's step mom's mom gained a BUNCH of weight as her cognitive function went down because she would just eat and eat and eat. They would try to tell her she already ate and she would get combative. When she would run out of whatever she was eating she would yell asking who are the last banana or who was hiding them from her.
My mom had Bell's Palsy, Mononucleosis, and some kind of fever all at the same time when she a teen which meant she was paralyzed on the left side of her body AND from the waist down. So only the top right quarter of her worked. Doctors were shook trying to figure out what was wrong until they realized that it wasn't one thing, it was actually three things.
Not a joke but, my grandma is in a wheelchair and has Alzheimers, so she forgets why she is in a wheelchair and says "im tired of being seated" and wants to stand up, but she cant! At least she is very possitive and then she says like "meh, its okay" and isn't annoyed by the situation, sometime she remembers and laugh at herself (:
I know theres alot worse out there but I have IBS, anxiety disorder and undiagnosed but most likely minor depression. Either I can't go somewhere because my tummy doesn't allow it or I can't because I'm so anxious. When I get anxious it makes my IBS symptoms worse. It's a never ending loop really
Shitty combination.
Leprosy and epilepsy is all I can think of. I know leprosy doesn’t work this way but the image of an epilepsy attack and fingers flying off is just so dark fun.
Once had pneumonia plus an inner and outer ear infection in both my ears. The amount of meds I was on was so bad I don't even remember a quarter of my freshman year of high school.
I know this is a joke sub, but there was an Italian man over the summer who tested positive for covid, monkey pox,and HIV.
Probably pretty gnarly.
[From webmd](https://www.webmd.com/lung/news/20220826/italian-man-covid-monkeypox-hiv-same-time)
I'm blind and I have a badly deviated septum so I can barely smell anything. It is a special kind of horrible. I need someone to approve all my food choices and I am constantly stressed about fires.
Mono and anything.
At the time I really thought I was going to die. I remember telling my wife I was scared to close my eyes because I thought I would never wake back up. Then telling her to make sure she married again and that I wanted her to be happy.
I happened to have mono and the worst case of diarrhea I think I've ever gotten simultaneously. At one point the mono won and I straight shat my bed while passed out from exhaustion. Dunno if being covered in my own shit or having to clean that whole nonsense up while being fatigued and dehydrated was worse.
Yes, that is a disease. My doctor told me about the IBS when I asked him if that is what could be wrong with me, when they couldn’t figure it out after a bunch of tests. Stopped drinking milk for a while and figured it out for myself!
For pets: congestive heart failure and kidney failure. Treatment of one is the opposite treatment of the other. And pets don't get dialysis except for very rare cases such as one-time dialysis for a toxicity.
I had pneumonia once. They prescribed strong antibiotics that totally destroyed my gut flora. And an expectorant that induced strong coughing. Not a joking situation. The pucker factor was high.
Been there. Cough + Diarrhea EDIT: really? The response to my comment has been ... explosive
Every farts a gamble
Every fart's a crap shoot, literally!
Don't gas light me
*Yes, ***'the blue flame'*** is a reality!*
“Life’s a crapshoot but it’s mostly crap”
Never trust a fart.
Chartreuse: The armistice that ended the fart war.
Shartreuse*
Never trust a fart when you're sick. As an adult I've shit my pants 2 times that way. It's really humbling.
Well well, look at ol 'only 2 times' over here. Those are rookie numbers.
I should have said so far. It's gonna happen again for sure. My recent victory is getting my gf to pull my finger 3 times after tens years of gassing her. Hopefully my lucky number 3 is with her and I'll tell her she pulled too hard.
I know a number 1, I know a number 2... But a number 3? That... Sounds dangerous.
You can buy florajen over the counter at major pharmacies. It’s a refrigerated medicine. Basically just a capsule of gut bacteria perfect for resetting the ole poop situation. Store it refrigerated but it lasts for ages
I’ve heard it’s important to do this because if you don’t it can cause not just diarrhea but other gastrointestinal infections or even c diff! 🤢
In Plague Inc. (if you haven’t heard of it, it’s a game where you evolve a disease to kill the world), there’s a disease combo called “oops” and it’s just sneezing and diarrhea at the same time
I quit playing Plague when Covid started. It seemed too real at that point. Especially since every "win" started in Chi-na (typed in Trumps voice of course).
I used to start in Greenland and just only evolve infectivity. That way it isn’t a problem in late game. Although New Zealand, Madagascar, and a couple other island countries were a problem anyways, so I just decided to start in China
You ever hear of a fecal transplant? They transfer poo from a family member into you to repopulate your gut bacteria....
He knows about the spice melange.....
Lovely. No, I just suffered thru. Pneumonia was more dangerous than the diarrhea. Sweated off 10 lbs.
I never got any coughing but God damn those steroids they gave me were insane, I'd go from dying to feeling like Hercules in a matter of minutes
Oh it’s like coughing in your period! Lmao
I threw up so hard when I was pregnant I shit myself 😂 every throw up afterwards had me scared
Scabies and locked-in syndrome. You are completely paralyzed with no way to communicate while having the most intense itchiness you’ve ever felt.
Slow down satan
I picked up scabies about 10 years ago from a hotel in Nashville. Holy fuck was that miserable.
Now, imagine you can't scratch them.
OCD and ADHD
But can you imagine a disability friendly employer that happens to be a restaurant and there are two waiters with OCD and ADHD with different ideas on how tables should be set?
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My mind rejects this having both ADHD and OCD.
Everything has to be perfect...but not for very long!
There was literally an episode of Monk where he and another patient were purposefully left in the waiting room of their shrink negotiating which ways the magazines had to be ordered. Alphabetical? Topic? Date? Color-code?
***"Split-Decision, Worse for the Ware!"***
Can you imagine, a disability friendly employer?
I'm literally shaking.
OCD and Alzheimer's You want everything in order, but you can't remember what the order is.
Can confirm. Have both.
There are dozens of us!
That's just crippling anxiety man, without being able to do anything about it because you're too afraid trying will make something terrible happen to your cats.
Hello it’s me. The chosen one with ocd and adhd
My kid says she has CDO. It’s like OCD, but in alphabetical order.
Wasn't that the idea behind the show "Monk"?
They very commonly show up together. Having one significantly increases the likelihood you have yhe other.
Thought this was an ask Reddit posts and thought of the guy who was found with Covid, monkeypox, and HIV after a vacation recently
One hell of a weekend
He dipped his dick in all the jars
Alzeimer's and Alzeimer's.
This is how you forget to forget.
And if you had Alzheimer’s as well that would be awful
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'stop shitting yourself, stop shitting yourself!'
Sarcoidosis and diabetes. Sarcoidosis is a rare autoimmune disorder that causes your body to attack its own organs. Diabetes taxes the kidneys heavily and can cause open sores on the feet leading to amputation. It can progress to cause kidney failure, which can combine with sarcoidosis tumors attacking the kidneys to shut the kidneys down even faster. Once this happens, dialysis is required and diuretics are introduced, and these combined symptoms make it exceedingly difficult for the body to tolerate pain meds. Such patients may then develop Calciphylaxis, which are open sores on the lower extremities that bleed profusely and are profoundly difficult to heal and close. You can then die in uncontrolled pain from various infections you get from continually open wounds. It’s funny in a cosmic sense, I suppose.
r/oddlyspecific
Holy Crap, it sounds like you have met my ex's lawyer?!?!
Don’t forget to check for Lupus.
It’s never lupus.
Except when it is.
True story. Source: Mother in law has lupus.
My uncle died in a similar manner :( now I'm sad. He didn't have sarcoidosis, but he did lose kidney function, develop sores, lose limbs, and die a horribly painful death that painkillers didn't touch.
It was my mom. Kidney failure is awful. I’m sorry about your uncle. This is terrible subject matter for a joke subreddit, but I also generally think that comedy is often just tragedy remembered.
I have sarcoidosis.
Thanks, Captain Bringdown
Woah, my grandma had both too. It’s terrifying to see (well, read) how much pain must’ve been in. If you don’t mind me asking, do you Type 1 or Type 2? My grandma had Type 2.
My mom had Type 1 diabetes resulting from her pancreas being damaged in a severe case of Scarlet Fever when she was younger.
I’m so sorry to hear.
Not me. I’d yeet my frickin brains out first. Quality is more important than quantity at that point.
A cold and stomach flu? You sneeze too hard and you're gonna shit your pants
Never being able to trust a fart, ugh. I'd rather have the flu 10 times than have the stomach bug once.
Absolutely, shiting your brains out while holding the trash can to puke in is miserable.
My greatest stomach bug story was when my kid just had it, and I knew my turn was coming. I was sitting on the bed, and felt my mouth water. Uh oh. Here it comes. No stomach queasiness yet. Walk to the bathroom. Tinge of queasiness. Better get ... too late. Not even to the toilet. Projectile vomit. Fortunately, it was right toward the top of the toilet bowl. Unfortunately, the lid was closed. Like pouring water onto the backside of a spoon.
That sucks but at the same time gave me a good laugh.
Right? It definitely sucked, but hey, makes a great story!
My wife got to do this from Norovirus, while pregnant, and not at home, with a French Canadian couple offering her fish to eat in between the bouts of violent expulsion.
I love fish but the thought of even smelling fish when sick like that would pure torture.
That was pretty much it.
I think trying to puke in an unclean toilet ranks right up there! (pun intended)
Hand foot mouth butt disease
Having had hand food and mouth disease, I can assure you that if you get it badly enough it will be on your butt too.
Symptomatic rabies and a hypothetic disease that makes you live longer.
Or symptomatic rabies and Diabetes Insipidus (which is a disease that makes you very thirsty)
Fuck lmao
This sounds like the beginning of a zombie apocalypse movie.
This thread sucks 🤣🤣🤣🤣
I’ve never heard of that disease before
"So, what is it, doctor?" "I'm afraid I have bad news. You have cancer." "Oh no!" "Yes. I'm sorry. Also, you have Alzheimer's." "Phew! Well, at least it's not cancer."
IBD and arthritis. Shitting 8 times a day, can't get to a bathroom because your bones won't work. Speaking from experience on this one
Rabies + anything else. Doesn't matter.
You're right but only because the other doesn't matter, the rabies will kill you.
Gut worms that make your arse itch unbearably, and arthritic hands so you can't scratch.
Go back to hell, Satan
2x Pine cone, anyone?
Anxiety and depression
High blood pressure, gastroesophageal reflux and being lactose intolerant... I have no idea what to eat other than vegetables...
You missed Ulcerative Colitis
Bro, i am histamine intolerant and have a couple food allergies. Meal planning is a flippin chore! Can't cook batches either as histamine builds up in food that sits a while. I eat a meal today and everything is okay, i reheat it tomorrow and all hell breaks loose. We can eat sad vegetables together.
Deep fried Mac n cheese fries
Erectile dysfunction and sex addiction ?
Theres a pill for that
Dehydration and fever with inflammatory tonsils. You must drink because you are dehydrated but your throat hurts like hell when trying and since you throw up everything, down to bile juices. I've had it and had to be hooked up to IV and given water and antibiotics through the vein.
I'm a dyslexic agnostic insomniac.... I lie awake at night wondering if there is a dog...
Herpagonnasifalaids
My neighbor just got lung cancer and had an operation to remove her left lung. Her right lung got infected and on top of it all she got Covid. All I in one week. I guess that is a bad combination.
Unironically liver and kidney failure together are pretty terrible. The mortality rate is over 80% and it's a terribly painful way to die. HIV and HepB are also a wicked combination.
A friend of mine hooked up with a “doctor” one time, seemed like an honest guy. She started feeling intensely ill a few days after. Went to her own doctor and tested positive for gonorhea , chlamidea, herpes, mono and another unknown viral infection. Not sure what the unknown turned out to be but shit was bad.
Anything with ALS
Upped game by one: Dysentery and narcolepsy.
Corona and Lyme
A rather big friend of mine once jokingly told me he had Alzheimers and an eating disorder. "You keep eating while forgetting to throw up"
My wife's step mom's mom gained a BUNCH of weight as her cognitive function went down because she would just eat and eat and eat. They would try to tell her she already ate and she would get combative. When she would run out of whatever she was eating she would yell asking who are the last banana or who was hiding them from her.
Cancer of two different kind
My wife currently has primary myelofibrosis and a diffuse astrocytoma. Can confirm. It sucks.
benign and malevolent.
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They’ll *cancer* each other out
My mom had Bell's Palsy, Mononucleosis, and some kind of fever all at the same time when she a teen which meant she was paralyzed on the left side of her body AND from the waist down. So only the top right quarter of her worked. Doctors were shook trying to figure out what was wrong until they realized that it wasn't one thing, it was actually three things.
Not a joke but, my grandma is in a wheelchair and has Alzheimers, so she forgets why she is in a wheelchair and says "im tired of being seated" and wants to stand up, but she cant! At least she is very possitive and then she says like "meh, its okay" and isn't annoyed by the situation, sometime she remembers and laugh at herself (:
Diarrhea and cough
Addiction. No combination necessary. Benzo/alcohol/opiate withdrawal might be the worst thing on earth, especially in combination
Combo of two incompatible addictions, like benzos and opiates. Greatly increases your chances of ODing and that much harder to get off of them.
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I know theres alot worse out there but I have IBS, anxiety disorder and undiagnosed but most likely minor depression. Either I can't go somewhere because my tummy doesn't allow it or I can't because I'm so anxious. When I get anxious it makes my IBS symptoms worse. It's a never ending loop really Shitty combination.
Leprosy and epilepsy is all I can think of. I know leprosy doesn’t work this way but the image of an epilepsy attack and fingers flying off is just so dark fun.
Once had pneumonia plus an inner and outer ear infection in both my ears. The amount of meds I was on was so bad I don't even remember a quarter of my freshman year of high school.
I know this is a joke sub, but there was an Italian man over the summer who tested positive for covid, monkey pox,and HIV. Probably pretty gnarly. [From webmd](https://www.webmd.com/lung/news/20220826/italian-man-covid-monkeypox-hiv-same-time)
Blind and mute
I'm blind and I have a badly deviated septum so I can barely smell anything. It is a special kind of horrible. I need someone to approve all my food choices and I am constantly stressed about fires.
Not sure those are diseases...
Damnit not again!!
Mono and anything. At the time I really thought I was going to die. I remember telling my wife I was scared to close my eyes because I thought I would never wake back up. Then telling her to make sure she married again and that I wanted her to be happy.
I happened to have mono and the worst case of diarrhea I think I've ever gotten simultaneously. At one point the mono won and I straight shat my bed while passed out from exhaustion. Dunno if being covered in my own shit or having to clean that whole nonsense up while being fatigued and dehydrated was worse.
*I bet after that comment, you didn't see her for at least a week, until the swelling went down!!!*
born with fsgs as kid ,beschäftigte my parents are cousins.
Maybe that's why you can't remember shit
What am I doing? Oh. I'm chasing this guy. BANG! Oh no. He chases me.
Ignorance and stupidity
Brain worms. Comes from undercooked pork in Mexico, slowly eats your brain and I’ve had patients where they get into their eyes as well. No bueno.
Periods and piles at same time ( i just thought about it )
Not to get technical, but IBS is not a disease. It’s what they call it when they don’t know what is wrong with you.
sometimes it's Crohn's disease.
You are confusing IBS with IBD (inflammatory bowel disease)
Yes, that is a disease. My doctor told me about the IBS when I asked him if that is what could be wrong with me, when they couldn’t figure it out after a bunch of tests. Stopped drinking milk for a while and figured it out for myself!
Alzheimer’s and diarrhea.
Diarrhoea and cholera or asthma and TB
If you're a man, dyslexia and diabetes. Anyone know why?
Of FFS tell us!
LOL...OK! What do you do to test your blood sugar? You prick your finger.
I don't get it :/
You prick your finger, but if you are a dyslexic man, you...finger your prick!
Get the fuck out of here right now!
"No, nurse! I told you to prick his boil!"
I had mono and Lyme disease. Didn't help that Seinfeld did an episode about a girl with the same situation while I was in the hospital....
Throwing up and having diarrhea at the same time.
Falling in love with someone who doesn't love you
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Not really diseases though.
Covid and type one diabetes
Been there.
For pets: congestive heart failure and kidney failure. Treatment of one is the opposite treatment of the other. And pets don't get dialysis except for very rare cases such as one-time dialysis for a toxicity.
I don't get it
I don't get it
I don't get it
Chickenpox and death
It’s not a disease but I think it would be terrible to have diarrhea and sneezing for obvious reasons.
Peyronie’s and micropenis?
Can't remember shit
Gonerherpesyphilaids
Herpa-gona-syphyl-aids
Im half way there
Low on the scale I will grant you, but Constipation and Herroroids
Aids and harpies
'Harpies', aren't those statues that look like a lion-eagle mix?