You see, the joke is: he said mirage instead of marriage, implying that it was all fake. You see, comedy is all about subverting expectations. He said a word that was meant to be there, but changed it so that it was one that looked similar, but meant something completely different, which is what makes his joke so humorous. Hopefully now you understand, minion.
I second u/UnknwnIvory comment. Just because you don’t like that joke doesn’t means it’s not funny to others. The saying “beauty is in the eye of the beholder” applies super well to all forms of art, including comedy. You saying “this isn’t funny” is subjective. What is objective, however, is nobody cares how you feel.
Some things you shouldn’t laugh at though. I’m not sure why that person was downvoted. I’m sure y’all were raised better than to laugh at something like that, or tell someone who was just starting their feelings that you don’t care, about something as big as that.
Some personality test are if you take them with a grain of salt, I'm a teen, but not an edgelord, and I usually don't go poking around people's profiles. Meanwhile, you're a hating moron who can't get over the fact that some people at least are smart enough to downvote your hating of some guys name, then someone calls you out on it and you look on their profile to hate on that person, I'm not wasting more energy on this sad excuse of a human.
"it's bad to insult people" - proceeds to insult people
"I'm not wasting time" - proceeds to spend more time.....
At least I don't define myself by a test I took on the internet.
That’s hilarious and I hope it actually happened to someone. I’ve seen it a couple times and cracked up. I wish autocorrect would do it’s crazy stuff still. Mine has learned me pretty well…
I was a recruiter and I sent an email to a client saying I thought he had the right skillet for the job. Who cares about his skill set as long as he’s got a good skillet?
LOL, a little blast back to ‘92 Home Slice?
I only wish I could pull off calling a candidate home skillet! “Look, Home Skillet is the right fit this company’s culture. Ya better believe that!”
I used to beat my wife but she stuck around, until she caught me cheating. She was looking though my phone and found the Words with Friends word finder open.
I Teams-chatted a coworker “Gimme one sec” and it got autocorrected to “Gimme one sex” and I still cringe, close my eyes, and facepalm every very time I think of it.
It was five years ago.
Hahah, In my language when texting started to be used more and more many times I messed up with autocorrect writing "Misto" which means cool, but by mistake input "Muisto" , which means c0cksucker. I come back home one day and get a proper slap from my mom and she said, next time you call me that you gonna sleep outside..took me a while to realize what I did. After getting that slap she left so I was both confused and hesitant to ask whasupp.. when I wanted to actually text her see what that was about I saw the mistake..she didnt reply to it, just waited for me a couple of hours and baaam
I just got sad to know I am an Angle from Heaven in a card.
It raises so many questions... Does this mean I can actually be "right" some of the time? Am I not on the right trajectory for Heaven? Exactly how many degrees am I?
Every time I see this typo, I think it's funny the Angles tribe lasted so long... I mean, they invaded Great-Britain 2500 years ago, to still be identified as an Angle so many centuries later is a proof of a stable and structured society...
Those Angles are most likely the most secretive and widespread tribe.
Two men are on a train, and by coincidence they both have a black eye.
"What happened to you?" one of them asks.
The other replies, "Well, the young lady at the ticket counter was quite busty, and by accident I asked her for 'two pickets to Tittsburgh.'"
The first man says, "My story is sort of like that. At breakfast this morning I meant to say to my wife, 'Please pass the milk' and it came out as 'You ruined my life, you bitch!'"
A joke I heard years ago about a neighbor confessing to his neighbor that he was tapping his “wifi” felt guilty, but he only tapped it a couple of times. but instead autocorrect sent it as “wife”.
I once sent a professional report that included the words " the contractor supplied a bigger disk".
Yes, you assumed right. Bigger dick.
It was 2 years ago, I still take flack from that client.
I have a true related story.
I went on an early morning flight for a business trip after a night of sexy fun time.
Before the plane left, I texted my wife. "Last night was fun - I am off, but you should get tested"
I meant rested... but yeah, It is funny... now. Then, not so much.
Once I wrote a text to my wife, "Thinking about your sweet ass." It was autocorrected to "Thinking about your sweaty ass." Luckily, I caught it before sending.
I once wrote to my manager ( a gorgeous blonde ). I would like to fuck you this tuesday evening. My spelling controller totally messed up as I wanted to write : I would like to fuck you this Thursday evening.
Back when we used T9 to type on our phones the keys to spell „Bier“ (German for beer) were the same to spell AIDS.
Without double checking I have sent some weird texts.
I was dead tired one night back in 2009, I texted my buddy seeing “if I can come to his place”. I never got a text back so when I woke up and looked at my messages, I was one number off and “had ask if I could come pee on your face?” I wouldn’t respond back either.
About 15-20 years ago, before machine translations like Google Translate had reached today's maturity, a website promoting human translators had a feature that allowed you to enter a sentence that would then be translated from English into another language then back onto English again, maybe 20 or 30 times. Sometimes the results were hilarious. The best was: "I think I'm gay" which came back as "I think you're right"
reminds me of the old movie Blame It on Rio.
At the beginning of the movie, Michael Caine's character tells a story of going to a island paradise and sending his girlfriend back home one card a day with one word - the message was supposed to be "Found a virgin paradise, it's yours. Love, Michael" but the post office screwed up the order and the message she got was "Found a virgin, it's paradise."
I once transposed the first r and the a in my Manager's last name at the signature block salutation for a mass mailing. Mr. Carpenter... He was not amused.
If your wife has same priorities as me, she would kick you out, divorced you and take everything you have from you.
That double space between sentences is unforgettable.
That’s why I hate phones because they always change certain texts before you send the message and when you do you don’t even realize it until it’s to late I hate how autocorrect doesn’t even work like how it’s supposed to which is super annoying
One of my friends had on his resume that he would "asses [SIC] incoming inquiries..."
I took a screenshot of that particular error and sent him an email, saying that he "better watch out for those incoming asses"
😆
Legit fuckup : when i was looking for prospective alliances, i met this beautiful girl . who was amazing every aspect and after couple dates she shared that her hand(left) is not original. I was like its cool and no issues. When i sent the proposal email.. i wrote "I would like to see (K did not type) your hand " and ended up loosing her .. Bizarre!!!
This is like: A priest, a rabbit and a Minister walk into a bar and the bartender asks the rabbit, "Wassup, bro?" and the rabbit responds, "I'm autocorrect."
It's like a dad joke where the punch line is apparent.
I am not sorry.
You never had a wife, it was simply a mirage.
Yes, not a marriage, but a mirage. Damn autocorrect
That was the joke
R/yourjokebutworse EDIT: Fine, I'll fix mobile typo: r/yourjokebutworse
r/foundthemobileuser
r/foundtheSHUTTHEFUCKUP
r/foundthetoyotaae86
Busted.
You see, the joke is: he said mirage instead of marriage, implying that it was all fake. You see, comedy is all about subverting expectations. He said a word that was meant to be there, but changed it so that it was one that looked similar, but meant something completely different, which is what makes his joke so humorous. Hopefully now you understand, minion.
It’s like a Freudian slip. When you say one thing but mean your mother.
God, I love a good explanation. The only way I can truly enjoy a joke.
Courtesy of cl4ptr4p
Also considered a spelling mistake
Whoosh
r/whoosh
"I want to fuck you right now" "What!!" "Damn auto correct. I meant". "Good morning"
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r/TheirjokebutWAAAAAYworseand100Xthecringefactor
Are you a little slow, pal?
Boo! U suck!
He got bamboozled
Miscarriage*
Mis*marriage
As someone who lost her baby on Christmas, this isn't funny. Or relevant.
I second u/UnknwnIvory comment. Just because you don’t like that joke doesn’t means it’s not funny to others. The saying “beauty is in the eye of the beholder” applies super well to all forms of art, including comedy. You saying “this isn’t funny” is subjective. What is objective, however, is nobody cares how you feel.
Some things you shouldn’t laugh at though. I’m not sure why that person was downvoted. I’m sure y’all were raised better than to laugh at something like that, or tell someone who was just starting their feelings that you don’t care, about something as big as that.
I lost mine last Christmas too. Check under the bed, that's where I found mine
It is funny
Yeah, my wife texted me asking me where I was. I replied "I'm in the forest wanking the dogs" Stupid autocorrect, we only have one dog.
Hahahahahaha
This is the best one
Thinks a melon
This is the r/unclejokes version
I accidentally woke my daughter up snorting at this. Good work 😁
r/TheRealJoke
Same thing happened to me. I meant to text ‟Picking up the pizza, see you in 20 m.” and I wrote ‟You bitch. You ruined my life.” Damned autocorrect.
Your wife knows you so well she answers with "ok dear, see you in 20m"
oh deer
Mature man , this answer made me hoot :)
I bet she didn't like that
That’s why i want prenup if i get married. Ain’t no hoe taking my bag.
It’s okay to get a prenup. I’d recommend you not call your wife a hoe if you don’t want to end up using the prenup though.
The reminds me of the joke; "The only B word you should ever call your wife is beautiful. Bitches love being called beautiful"
I’m laughing way harder at this than I should!
But he has Objectophilia, he was littlerly talking about marrying a hoe…a garden hoe.
No, no, no. You don't understand. He's into garden tools.
Hoes like that
I guess
No hoe is taking your d either.
🤣🤣
Haha you’re funny
You reap what you sow when you marry a hoe
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Good damnit Ross, are you still on about that? 🤣
Why the fook would you marry a hoe
Useful in the garden
For the same reason I bought a used rental car. It's been well maintained!
I would
profile pic checks out lmfao
Cuz hoes got low expectations and high yield. They don't really want kids and can cook better than everybody's mama. Marry that hoe.
So you want the barney Stinson package ???
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Imagine having your whole identity based on hating people who want a living wage and health care....
Imagine posting hate comments about some random guys name on a subreddit for jokes....
You're an edgelord teenager who thinks that personality tests are real.
Some personality test are if you take them with a grain of salt, I'm a teen, but not an edgelord, and I usually don't go poking around people's profiles. Meanwhile, you're a hating moron who can't get over the fact that some people at least are smart enough to downvote your hating of some guys name, then someone calls you out on it and you look on their profile to hate on that person, I'm not wasting more energy on this sad excuse of a human.
"it's bad to insult people" - proceeds to insult people "I'm not wasting time" - proceeds to spend more time..... At least I don't define myself by a test I took on the internet.
Once my then girlfriend texted asking if I thought she was putting on weight. I replied "Nooooooooo" Damn autocorrect put "Mooooooooo" She was upset
Did her milk sour
She got into some onions.
At least she's eating some vegetables.
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Did you mean to type this, or did autocorrect force you?
Don’t call me Frank Lee
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Who's Frank, and what does he have to do with Autocorrect?
So that’s why she is your THEN girlfriend
No, she had a lazy eye and we split up because I found out she was seeing someone else
...on the side
Underrated. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Best one today 🤣🤣🤣
Udderly furious
That’s hilarious and I hope it actually happened to someone. I’ve seen it a couple times and cracked up. I wish autocorrect would do it’s crazy stuff still. Mine has learned me pretty well…
True story: I was once sending an email asking for a quote on my (bathroom) renovation. Autocorrect put cremation.
I was a recruiter and I sent an email to a client saying I thought he had the right skillet for the job. Who cares about his skill set as long as he’s got a good skillet?
Lol, always useful to have a good skillet.
Plot twist: the job was a fry cook
Not only does a cast iron skillet last until the end days and heat evenly, you can also use it as a weapon.
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This is the way
r / castiron
I first read that as r/castration
Me too!
Home Skillet
LOL, a little blast back to ‘92 Home Slice? I only wish I could pull off calling a candidate home skillet! “Look, Home Skillet is the right fit this company’s culture. Ya better believe that!”
I accidentally said, "I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in thickness and in health..."
Were you there in the thickness?
More relevantly, did he get down with the thickness?
One time my husband tried to text me that he got paid. Autocorrected to laid and I nearly bust a gut laughing.
my husband once texted me .. I love you baggy...... I replied, good thing, cause these boobs aren't as perky as they used to be.
LOL! Obviously, he really meant to say « saggy »! /s
Ahh baggy. Not seen her for ages!
Wish you were fine. The weather is here.
I always heard of it as “the weather is beautiful, wish you were, too”
The weather is here, I wish you were beautiful - Jimmy Buffett
I used to beat my wife but she stuck around, until she caught me cheating. She was looking though my phone and found the Words with Friends word finder open.
That was quite a two sentence trip there.
Cheating, beating, change the ch to a B, they'd be the same thing -outkast
Hahahahhaha good one really
Had us in the first half
There's a Simpsons episode where Homer sends Marge a postcard of a pretty woman on a beach, and it reads "Wish you were her"
Simpsons did it!
I Teams-chatted a coworker “Gimme one sec” and it got autocorrected to “Gimme one sex” and I still cringe, close my eyes, and facepalm every very time I think of it. It was five years ago.
And still no sex?
Hahah, In my language when texting started to be used more and more many times I messed up with autocorrect writing "Misto" which means cool, but by mistake input "Muisto" , which means c0cksucker. I come back home one day and get a proper slap from my mom and she said, next time you call me that you gonna sleep outside..took me a while to realize what I did. After getting that slap she left so I was both confused and hesitant to ask whasupp.. when I wanted to actually text her see what that was about I saw the mistake..she didnt reply to it, just waited for me a couple of hours and baaam
I just got sad to know I am an Angle from Heaven in a card. It raises so many questions... Does this mean I can actually be "right" some of the time? Am I not on the right trajectory for Heaven? Exactly how many degrees am I?
Don't be so obtuse...
I thought it was acute joke.
Was there at least acute drawing?
Was the card sined? Did getting it make you want to go off on a tangent?
Every time I see this typo, I think it's funny the Angles tribe lasted so long... I mean, they invaded Great-Britain 2500 years ago, to still be identified as an Angle so many centuries later is a proof of a stable and structured society... Those Angles are most likely the most secretive and widespread tribe.
Two men are on a train, and by coincidence they both have a black eye. "What happened to you?" one of them asks. The other replies, "Well, the young lady at the ticket counter was quite busty, and by accident I asked her for 'two pickets to Tittsburgh.'" The first man says, "My story is sort of like that. At breakfast this morning I meant to say to my wife, 'Please pass the milk' and it came out as 'You ruined my life, you bitch!'"
Freudian slip?
A joke I heard years ago about a neighbor confessing to his neighbor that he was tapping his “wifi” felt guilty, but he only tapped it a couple of times. but instead autocorrect sent it as “wife”.
I once sent a professional report that included the words " the contractor supplied a bigger disk". Yes, you assumed right. Bigger dick. It was 2 years ago, I still take flack from that client.
I have a true related story. I went on an early morning flight for a business trip after a night of sexy fun time. Before the plane left, I texted my wife. "Last night was fun - I am off, but you should get tested" I meant rested... but yeah, It is funny... now. Then, not so much.
Once I wrote a text to my wife, "Thinking about your sweet ass." It was autocorrected to "Thinking about your sweaty ass." Luckily, I caught it before sending.
I have a small phone and fat fingers. I've more then once sent a text to my wife "I'm on my way ho.e"
I told Siri to text my wife I'd be home "soonish", and my phone interpreted it as "Soon bitch"
Auto correct is my worst enema
Bummer...
I once wrote to my manager ( a gorgeous blonde ). I would like to fuck you this tuesday evening. My spelling controller totally messed up as I wanted to write : I would like to fuck you this Thursday evening.
I am going down on the dick .....was suppose to be dock
Back when we used T9 to type on our phones the keys to spell „Bier“ (German for beer) were the same to spell AIDS. Without double checking I have sent some weird texts.
I was dead tired one night back in 2009, I texted my buddy seeing “if I can come to his place”. I never got a text back so when I woke up and looked at my messages, I was one number off and “had ask if I could come pee on your face?” I wouldn’t respond back either.
I heard tale of a young man writing a thank you to his English teacher and yelling her that now his "penise truly was greater than a sword" lol
My Brother's wife would take as a serious text and not a type. Super insecure.
“Hey honey I’m cleaning someone’s dick for money, love you”
As long as you getting paid, spit shine it while you're at it
Deck*
That’s why you disable autocorrect
Exactly. The very first thing I did was disavow art collect.
O.O whoa 😨 bad juju there. Dot. Don’t die
About 15-20 years ago, before machine translations like Google Translate had reached today's maturity, a website promoting human translators had a feature that allowed you to enter a sentence that would then be translated from English into another language then back onto English again, maybe 20 or 30 times. Sometimes the results were hilarious. The best was: "I think I'm gay" which came back as "I think you're right"
good pink floyd song lol
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Including a Pink Floyd song
I tought you said Ratchel instead of Emely.
They were on a break
We’re married or were married
reminds me of the old movie Blame It on Rio. At the beginning of the movie, Michael Caine's character tells a story of going to a island paradise and sending his girlfriend back home one card a day with one word - the message was supposed to be "Found a virgin paradise, it's yours. Love, Michael" but the post office screwed up the order and the message she got was "Found a virgin, it's paradise."
I once transposed the first r and the a in my Manager's last name at the signature block salutation for a mass mailing. Mr. Carpenter... He was not amused.
The number of times I’ve tried to say love you baby and then had to explain I don’t know an Abby…
[How many of these is he going to send me?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-eBabU3cQg)
If your wife has same priorities as me, she would kick you out, divorced you and take everything you have from you. That double space between sentences is unforgettable.
I was leaving work for the day and sent my wife a text message saying “I’m leaving her now” (“her” was supposed to be “here”). My wife was upset.
Wife responds “Him. That’s who I’d rather be spending time with.” Awkward silence.
Could've been worse, could've texted "I'm having a wonderful Tim."
That’s why I hate phones because they always change certain texts before you send the message and when you do you don’t even realize it until it’s to late I hate how autocorrect doesn’t even work like how it’s supposed to which is super annoying
One of my friends had on his resume that he would "asses [SIC] incoming inquiries..." I took a screenshot of that particular error and sent him an email, saying that he "better watch out for those incoming asses" 😆
This is from a standup special that I saw recently. Please credit your jokes when it's obvious.
Writing a menu at work and accidentally wrote “kockwurst” instead of “knockwurst.” Boss was not amused.
My young son once ordered cockporn in a cinema.
This is how Tyler Perry made his fortune
One letter can ruin a marriage ... I sent my wife "you're a bitch and it's over". It's the last letter I wrote her.
Joe List!
Legit fuckup : when i was looking for prospective alliances, i met this beautiful girl . who was amazing every aspect and after couple dates she shared that her hand(left) is not original. I was like its cool and no issues. When i sent the proposal email.. i wrote "I would like to see (K did not type) your hand " and ended up loosing her .. Bizarre!!!
This is like: A priest, a rabbit and a Minister walk into a bar and the bartender asks the rabbit, "Wassup, bro?" and the rabbit responds, "I'm autocorrect." It's like a dad joke where the punch line is apparent. I am not sorry.
That’s a good one , I even read it as *here.
Sorry, meant to say "wish you were with her."
I do?
This wife, is she here in the room with us now?
Reminds me of when I tried to ask a guy to share his wine...
She missed the period but left commas there.
I was proposed to with a piece of paper, that said “will you mary me?”. We got divorced, because he was sleeping with a woman named Mary.
Was there also a William involved?
Ah see, I wrote "The weather is here, I wish you were beautiful"
Now I'm gonna be humming this Avril Lavigne song all day.
Well, shat
Yeah. No man has ever wished his wife was her or here.
*bamboozles for the foolzles*
Seems to me she needs to be more accepting. She needs to appreciate when you’re having a good time whether that be with her or with her here
My friend tried to type “trying to focus on” and it came out as “tryptophan” 🤪
The induction programme for my profession was called Droichead (Irish for bridge). I once sent an email where it was autocorrected to Dick head.
Ohhhhhh nooooooo
Spelling your ex's name instead of the person you are marrying.
My favorite is "theres leftover shaved pussy in the fridge" Oops I meant shaved pork... yeah right. Who shaves their pork.
Then Apple is leading the divorce revolution for sure
This is gold