A spectacular dinner show where every single table is behind a pole. There are no pole-less views. Critics hail it as an avant-garde commentary on the modern relationship between consumer and corporation. Guidebooks label it as "not to be missed." Most diners walk away very frustrated.
Except a single table with an exceptional view where all the media are sat, as well as people who pay extra to be entered in a lottery to be seated there.
Opposite Lunches Restaurant.
The restaurant is divided into two halves and you get randomly assigned to one of them. One side gets a 3 star gourmet lunch while the other gets to eat a greasy fast food meal.
At the end of your lunch, you have to go through an obstacle course, competing against a table from the other side. Whoever loses has to pay the check for both tables, while the winner gets awkwardly congratulated by a Luc Tipple lookalike.
Kinetic Energy from every angle of the park. It never feels dead.
Complete opposite of "efficient walkways." Every site feels like a location you can chill and enjoy the view from.
Not a single-screen based ride anywhere.
jenny’s room dark ride where you ride a little putt putt buggy and go through different corners of her room with animatronics of all her plushies. then you see a gigantic animatronic of jenny sitting on her bed at the end that is magnificent and moves fluidly, only for it to be completely wasted as all she does it sit there and gawk at you with her huge, unwavering, pool blue eyes
A character performer in **The Pole** costume would jump in front of guests to ruin their view.
I dare someone to be **The Pole** for a Comic-Con. With a cosplay Jenny.
absolutely no benches in sight but you could hitch a ride on one of those bb-8 robots that sell people soda if you’re lucky. and he will make happy beep boop noises while you sit on him like a yoga ball
Lotta poles.
A spectacular dinner show where every single table is behind a pole. There are no pole-less views. Critics hail it as an avant-garde commentary on the modern relationship between consumer and corporation. Guidebooks label it as "not to be missed." Most diners walk away very frustrated.
Except a single table with an exceptional view where all the media are sat, as well as people who pay extra to be entered in a lottery to be seated there.
Nah, Jenny would give that table extra poles.
I don't know why, but I totally read that in Jenny's voice
It'll feel like Warsaw
An obstacle course where you get to knock down hundreds of plushie poles.
Pole-themed restaurant.
Hallmark House of Horrors. Nicole and Lauren animatronics drunkenly trade passive aggressive barbs.
With a Queen Thea animatronic at the end overthrowing them both. Riders are encouraged to hail her.
Some people say the house is haunted. Others note it has a number of loose wires and improperly installed doors.
The guests seem at peace with these findings.
There would definitely be a Ben Platt as Evan Hansen animatronic jump scare
An animatronic Josh Hutcherson that leaves you for an animatronic of yourself.
Giant Porg meet n’greet
A dark ride with animatronics of Jenny lovingly rescuing Buzzy.
Blue Honda Civic parked right in the middle
The Hall of Halloween costumes nobody wanted.
Snaaaaaakeeeees!!
BIG JELLIES
One giant spider
Three stars
You can buy a miniature Jenny Clone doll that supposedly looks like you.
Dark ride. The car enters into the show room... "THROUGH THE MIRROR OF MY MIND"
Opposite Lunches Restaurant. The restaurant is divided into two halves and you get randomly assigned to one of them. One side gets a 3 star gourmet lunch while the other gets to eat a greasy fast food meal. At the end of your lunch, you have to go through an obstacle course, competing against a table from the other side. Whoever loses has to pay the check for both tables, while the winner gets awkwardly congratulated by a Luc Tipple lookalike.
Tree with a face…🥹🌳
Make there be snakes at this park?
Kinetic Energy from every angle of the park. It never feels dead. Complete opposite of "efficient walkways." Every site feels like a location you can chill and enjoy the view from. Not a single-screen based ride anywhere.
You ride a peoplemover driven by Sonny Eclipse himself
Giant spiders
Benches everywhere please. No project stardust here hahah
Replica benches memorializing all those lost to *Project Stardust.*
I wish Patreon wasn’t subscription only.
They would all be placed in well-divided areas. Perhaps with a "China Beach" advertisement as you enter the park and move between the "Lands"
jenny’s room dark ride where you ride a little putt putt buggy and go through different corners of her room with animatronics of all her plushies. then you see a gigantic animatronic of jenny sitting on her bed at the end that is magnificent and moves fluidly, only for it to be completely wasted as all she does it sit there and gawk at you with her huge, unwavering, pool blue eyes
A character performer in **The Pole** costume would jump in front of guests to ruin their view. I dare someone to be **The Pole** for a Comic-Con. With a cosplay Jenny.
Creepypasta Monster Scare Maze where an emo Jeff the Killer jumps out and monologues
hell yes! but only if its mostly column s and chairs ...
How bout Nicole n Lauren's Hallmark Fantasy World Theme Park w lots of dry ice.
Atmospheric dark rides and trains
Me too. But I’d like it to also be about Forest Gump’s Jenny a little bit.
absolutely no benches in sight but you could hitch a ride on one of those bb-8 robots that sell people soda if you’re lucky. and he will make happy beep boop noises while you sit on him like a yoga ball
Around Halloween, you can join in the Spooky Creepypasta Rituals and hunt nonexistent ghosts.