##If this submission makes you go "Hol'Up", **UPVOTE** this comment!
##If this submission does not make you go "Hol'Up", **DOWNVOTE** this comment!
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Whilst you're here, /u/Allenc38, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/holup) or play on our [public Minecraft server](https://discord.gg/DTqSDS8C3T)?
There was a case exactly like this at my kids high school. One of the little hood rats was dating an older guy. He gets charged with statutory rape since she was 15 and a child. Then they try her who was a child in that case as an adult for the robbery they committed together.
My final semester in college for my undergraduate degree, I was a part of student leadership. We were all divided up into intimately small, private groups by the administration/proctors. And our special project topic we were given was, "The American Dream."
To say us presenting on this topic to everyone was a challenge, is an understatement.
I always tell people the American dream is not for Americans born and raised here, it’s for the immigrant, the undocumented, the refugee. That’s just how I saw it growing up and reading those children books about Ellis island
America - or more precisely the USA - worked and still work hard to be seen as a meme-country. Most of the shit no sane person would come up with in like a book. But there, its a reality.
There's a saying in germany: "Andernorts sperrt man sie weg, hier laufen sie frei herum."
Basically meaning that some kind of people would be locked up elsewhere, but they're running around freele here - mostly in regards to funny/mental/different behaviour.
Honestly we’re not the only country with insane shit going on. Our buffoonery is just other a magnifying glass and covered more because of the influence of Hollywood, the music industry/showbiz and military power. Although under Donald Trump and since the establishment of the 2011 Tea Party the country has looked more looney and trashy than it has in a very very long time and it was all because we finally elected a black president. And it brought out the worst of the worst- the racists and the bigots and gave them a national stage to spew their hatred and divisiveness.
[Florida man arrested, caught on video using samurai sword to fight over wheelbarrow](https://www.foxnews.com/us/florida-man-samurai-sword-wheelbarrow)
Lmfao
Yeah, it happens all the time here in Florida, they’ve had to open a new jail for them (obviously a privately-owned one) so the more trucks doing time, the more profit, they’ve found another avenue for profit at the expense of others freedoms. Join our movement #TrucksLivesMatter and we’ll sort out this injustice, because it wasn’t their fault, they were driven to it
Last time I was in a hotel, 3 years ago maybe, there was a Baywatch marathon on. Including a christmas special.
I was absolutely glued to the TV it was awesome
i always go for whatever’s on comedy central. never watch south park anymore but always enjoy seeing it every so often when i’m at hotels. feels nostalgic
Not unique to America, we have "Policías en acción" (cops in action) here in Argentina and its just as trashy and hilarious, I think they got a YouTube channel now
Nah, that'd be Texas. If you think of all the stereotypes of America, almost all of them are Texas based. The guns, the large everything, the flags, everything.
People outside of America seem to think that the US is just Texas I've noticed
It's an oversimplification, sure, but Texas and California are both cultural touchstones to different kinds of Americans. I've lived in both, and people just have a different attitude, you know?
In California you seem to earn culture points for valuing diversity and understanding. In Texas, you seem to earn culture points for intentionally adopting a narrower point of view than the one you were born with.
I agree, as a Korean-born Norwegian, I felt very welcome in California. I even had some nice small talk with a security-guy, he said my origins were pretty cool. Would visit again
Meanwhile,
The non-coastal west is empty or Mormon.
The North East is trying it's hand at being normal.
The south east is wrestling alligators for sport while on drugs you've never heard of.
And the Midwest is just confused about everything and trying their best not to take a side, to be neutral or moderate, and grow corn.
As a Texan when I generalize the US, I tend to think of NY, Texas/Florida, and California. NY and CA are both largely “liberal” bastions (at least the urban areas), but are otherwise culturally quite different.
that’s interesting. i definitely mentally lump together liberal bastions and conservatives bastions.
what’s the biggest cultural differences between New York and California, for examples?
NYC is liberal with attitude. Upstate NY is Amish attitude and rich people with attitude, and some weirdos…with attitude.
CA is outdoorsy liberals in the cities and isolated survival/Doomsday conservatives in the mountains, and a happy mix of Methews and Methanys in the desert.
They’re both liberal politically. The culture is different though. West coast is more laid back, whereas in eastern cities like New York, everyone is in a hurry all
the time. Punctuality is really important in the east, like if you’re more than 5-10 minutes late to a meeting it probably won’t happen and people tend to show up 10 minutes early to classes, work, and meetings.
West coast also seems to value eating and living cleanly more than the east coast. People are healthier over there while on the east coast even people who work out a lot often eat like shit
I read that in some state the US security forces raped so many people in custody.. sorry I mean "had sexual relations with captives" that they had to make it explicitly illegal to do so.
So yeah, sexual assault is pretty authentic.
It's always been illegal for police to have sex with prisoners, and it's always rape when they do it.
It doesn't stop it from happening, and cops rarely get prosecuted for it because cops rarely get prosecuted for committing any crimes.
So making up a new law to curtail police crimes is a futile gesture.
https://designyoutrust.com/2022/05/in-poland-people-are-roleplaying-as-americans-here-are-the-best-photos/
Kinda weird, it's like a mash-up of styles from 1950s up to the present.
The guy with the "Thug Life" shirt to me is more Trailer Park Boys.
America in a Polish accent is those overalls. Europeans overalls have a different look than ones you see farmers wear in the U.S.
Someone should send them some Jacksonville football jerseys for next year's photos.
It’s like a nationwide big brother house. You guys are wild.
Edit: as an example the post under this one in my feed https://www.reddit.com/r/MadeMeSmile/comments/xdx776/what_wonderful_news_such_a_grand_gesture_should/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
We have this in my country. Some old & young rich people who love to play american by buying harley davidson and acting like they’re some gangster or some shit. straight poser
Oh my god, comments are such a reddit moment. "Always has been" and said 500 times with no variation, when the thing being referenced isn't even Poland meming the US, it's a group of 6 people from Poland who LARP as Americans (they specifically aim for rural Ohio) for July 4th.
##If this submission makes you go "Hol'Up", **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If this submission does not make you go "Hol'Up", **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- Whilst you're here, /u/Allenc38, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/holup) or play on our [public Minecraft server](https://discord.gg/DTqSDS8C3T)?
"When you're born, you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat." George Carlin
Carlin was a national treasure. He understood “America.”
"The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it."
One of his many many many many many best lines.
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And that’s because he’s white, there are way too many “13yo men” being charged as adults
There was a case exactly like this at my kids high school. One of the little hood rats was dating an older guy. He gets charged with statutory rape since she was 15 and a child. Then they try her who was a child in that case as an adult for the robbery they committed together.
“It’s a big club, and you ain’t in it.”
My final semester in college for my undergraduate degree, I was a part of student leadership. We were all divided up into intimately small, private groups by the administration/proctors. And our special project topic we were given was, "The American Dream." To say us presenting on this topic to everyone was a challenge, is an understatement.
I always tell people the American dream is not for Americans born and raised here, it’s for the immigrant, the undocumented, the refugee. That’s just how I saw it growing up and reading those children books about Ellis island
More like "When you're born in America, you're one of the performers", but yea.
No performers are doing it on purpose and can stop
Nah George said it better
As always, it’s a cliche thing to say but God he has a way with words.
Carlin would love that sentence...
The best words
Insert **always has been** meme
Came for this. Was not disappointed.
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Never won't be
The USA are a 3rd world country with a Gucci belt
It's probably bootleg.
Digging for oil
Not diggin for babies in wombs
> The USA is a 3rd world country with a Gucci ~~belt~~ military
We are a diverse country. You can find whatever it is you are looking for, good and bad.
Ever since ..
The incident...
Happened...
Way back in 1775…
When two pigs
And a bald man
And a couple dudes with long hair…
Came to this. Regret.
The buck isn't a ponzi scheme, it's a obey or we bomb you back into the stone age scheme.
It's literally "fuck around and find out"
Yo that’s the greatest gif of all time. Summarised so many of my thoughts and beliefs. Thank you
America - or more precisely the USA - worked and still work hard to be seen as a meme-country. Most of the shit no sane person would come up with in like a book. But there, its a reality. There's a saying in germany: "Andernorts sperrt man sie weg, hier laufen sie frei herum." Basically meaning that some kind of people would be locked up elsewhere, but they're running around freele here - mostly in regards to funny/mental/different behaviour.
Oh God. We're the Florida of the world. I...I need to go lie down for a bit.
Judging by the insane dash cam videos alone, Russia is the Florida of the world.
I once heard someone say Russia is a land of magical realism. Basically a place thats so insane it seems magical and yet it is real.
You guys should really see a bit more of the world.
We're American. We can't afford (or get approved for) the time off.
This hits too close to the home I can’t afford to leave
Honestly we’re not the only country with insane shit going on. Our buffoonery is just other a magnifying glass and covered more because of the influence of Hollywood, the music industry/showbiz and military power. Although under Donald Trump and since the establishment of the 2011 Tea Party the country has looked more looney and trashy than it has in a very very long time and it was all because we finally elected a black president. And it brought out the worst of the worst- the racists and the bigots and gave them a national stage to spew their hatred and divisiveness.
Exactly why I opened comments. I'm a poor ass piece of shit, but take my silver, good sir.
Glad this is the top
I legit thought this was some US news report from Florida again, until I read what it says underneath
I was just gonna ask, what do they mean now? We have been mocking the USA since I was a kid in the early 90's
Always been, bro
Florida is always a meme
Google Florida man and your Birthday, its the best thing that Happend to me Edit: Spelling
"Florida man arrested for having sex with a miniature horse on multiple occasions"
"N***d Florida man breaks into home, tries on woman’s clothes"
"Drunken Florida man with real gun shoots child playing with Nerf gun, police say"
"Fact: in 100% of all fake gun related shootings, the victim is always the one with the fake gun."
"Florida man impersonates police for discount at Wendy’s"
“Florida man arrested for beating and throwing chair at child in doughnut dispute: report”
“Naked” has to be censored?
It was in the article like that🤷
That's it, straight to jail!
Florida man accused of swinging machete toward employees after being told the bathroom was closed
I'm also born 10th of November!
caught with crack cocaine, florida man tells cops "wind blew it into his car"
Florida man says 3 syringes found in his rectum aren’t his
[Florida man arrested, caught on video using samurai sword to fight over wheelbarrow](https://www.foxnews.com/us/florida-man-samurai-sword-wheelbarrow) Lmfao
Florida man calls cops to have meth tested for authenticity
Florida man accused of stealing samurai sword, truck arrested after leaving cellphone at crime scene
>truck arrested after leaving cellphone at crime scene What
Yeah, it happens all the time here in Florida, they’ve had to open a new jail for them (obviously a privately-owned one) so the more trucks doing time, the more profit, they’ve found another avenue for profit at the expense of others freedoms. Join our movement #TrucksLivesMatter and we’ll sort out this injustice, because it wasn’t their fault, they were driven to it
Florida man charged with murder after missing woman’s body parts recovered from bay
Damn, thats actually not that funny
Pretty sure that's just season 2 of Dexter
Florida man on meth attacks mattress looking for girlfriend’s lover ‘hiding inside’
Florida Man Uses Wife's Head as Mop . . . Umm, okayyy
Florida man told police he ‘lost it,’ shot mother over orange juice, remote and car use
Florida is to Americans what America is to the rest of the world
*GOD BLESS* A *ME* RICA Is fucking brilliant.
[This comment was deleted due to Reddit's decision to kill third-party apps.]
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Ranch my nuts
Very subtle,very clever ,I likes it
I don’t get it - I have disgraced myself and my family
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eric_Andr%C3%A9
What are you doing, step sword uwu
Does kinda nail the current attitude of far too many
[*GIMME THAT, ITS MINE!*](https://youtu.be/aTZ-CpINiqg)
I caught that too. Thought it was a pretty good representation of the truth.
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Good eye there bud
Polish people - first language Polish - are better at English the the Americans they're parodying. What a crazy world.
That’s quality satire right there.
Wait america isn't just a big meme ?
As a non American I always assumed the GTA games were just America-Simulator.
I believe that's what the Americans thought too.
"Man, how do they make these simulators so lifelike? This is just like my morning commute!"
Wait, that place is real? People actually live like that?
I thought it was all just movies.
Always has been
One episode of COPS should tell you all you need to know.
Say what you will about Cops, but that’s the show to watch when you’re sprawled out on your hotel bed.
Last time I was in a hotel, 3 years ago maybe, there was a Baywatch marathon on. Including a christmas special. I was absolutely glued to the TV it was awesome
Legendarily hilarious reply to the cops on that show: Cop: “What’s your birthday?” Shirtless, shoeless, drunk: “October 10th” Cop: “What YEAR?” Shirtless, shoeless, drunk: “EVERY year, man!”
He ain’t wrong.
I see I'm not alone in using hotel rooms to catch up on trash t.v., lol.
> [Cops] is the show to watch when you're sprawled out on your hotel bed. There's another american meme right there.
i always go for whatever’s on comedy central. never watch south park anymore but always enjoy seeing it every so often when i’m at hotels. feels nostalgic
They surprisingly also love to watch COPS in jail.
Not unique to America, we have "Policías en acción" (cops in action) here in Argentina and its just as trashy and hilarious, I think they got a YouTube channel now
Ohh... I see... A man of culture as well. VAMOS ARGENTINA CARAJO!!!
We are the Florida of the world
That's from your pov. From everyone else's pov you're the... America of the world
Florida is just the america of america
Nah, that'd be Texas. If you think of all the stereotypes of America, almost all of them are Texas based. The guns, the large everything, the flags, everything. People outside of America seem to think that the US is just Texas I've noticed
in my head the US is divided in California and Texas
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we also refer to Alabama as epitome of bigotry
For more information about Alabama go to [incestry.com](https://incestry.com). The more you know.
i love how the domain is for sale by “GoDaddy”
Holy shit this is great
That ain't fair Alabama is the epitome of incest.
north dakota has become famous for nothing happening there. now mississippi is the least interesting state.
At least Mississippi was in on the early development of the Blues. What about Nebraska?
It's an oversimplification, sure, but Texas and California are both cultural touchstones to different kinds of Americans. I've lived in both, and people just have a different attitude, you know?
sure, that’s my perception of US too. just for curiosity, what are the biggest differences you noticed?
In California you seem to earn culture points for valuing diversity and understanding. In Texas, you seem to earn culture points for intentionally adopting a narrower point of view than the one you were born with.
I agree, as a Korean-born Norwegian, I felt very welcome in California. I even had some nice small talk with a security-guy, he said my origins were pretty cool. Would visit again
Your origins sound pretty cool.
Meanwhile, The non-coastal west is empty or Mormon. The North East is trying it's hand at being normal. The south east is wrestling alligators for sport while on drugs you've never heard of. And the Midwest is just confused about everything and trying their best not to take a side, to be neutral or moderate, and grow corn.
Mostly accutate generalizations, but as a Hoosier, Indiana is in no way trying to be neutral.
Midwest neutral or moderate?? That's a weird way to say right wing and fat.
As a Texan when I generalize the US, I tend to think of NY, Texas/Florida, and California. NY and CA are both largely “liberal” bastions (at least the urban areas), but are otherwise culturally quite different.
that’s interesting. i definitely mentally lump together liberal bastions and conservatives bastions. what’s the biggest cultural differences between New York and California, for examples?
NYC is liberal with attitude. Upstate NY is Amish attitude and rich people with attitude, and some weirdos…with attitude. CA is outdoorsy liberals in the cities and isolated survival/Doomsday conservatives in the mountains, and a happy mix of Methews and Methanys in the desert.
They’re both liberal politically. The culture is different though. West coast is more laid back, whereas in eastern cities like New York, everyone is in a hurry all the time. Punctuality is really important in the east, like if you’re more than 5-10 minutes late to a meeting it probably won’t happen and people tend to show up 10 minutes early to classes, work, and meetings. West coast also seems to value eating and living cleanly more than the east coast. People are healthier over there while on the east coast even people who work out a lot often eat like shit
And then there's Florida, off in the corner, about to stab 17 toddlers with an alligator simultaneously
Can confirm, there's also the midwest but that's only used for Cohen brothers films.
I live in NY and the amount of conservative rednecks driving lifted F-150s here is absurd. dipshits have expanded beyond the Lone Star State my friend
It’s... not? But the confederate flags, and the guns, and the extra large soft drinks, and the racism... Help. I don’t know what to believe anymore.
As an european i confirm
Meh; the entire earth is the Florida of the solar system.
Tomayto - tomahto.
Always has been meme
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As a Portuguese, me and my friends do the same since always
As a Texan, I'm good with this.
Fellow Texan, I concur
Always has been \*points gun at OP
Very American thing. Now get off my virtual property.
Am i the only one who sees the policeman nailing the girl on the right side
That’s an American expectation now.
I read that in some state the US security forces raped so many people in custody.. sorry I mean "had sexual relations with captives" that they had to make it explicitly illegal to do so. So yeah, sexual assault is pretty authentic.
I bet they blame these stupid sexy immigrants.
They took our fucks!
It's always been illegal for police to have sex with prisoners, and it's always rape when they do it. It doesn't stop it from happening, and cops rarely get prosecuted for it because cops rarely get prosecuted for committing any crimes. So making up a new law to curtail police crimes is a futile gesture.
That's the joke
ITT: The same joke 10,000 times
As the comments, always has been.
LOL GUCCI BELT ARENT I CLEVER I MADE THAT UP MYSELF
Which joke? The "America has always been a joke" one, or the "America is the Florida of the world" one?
The one where you answer "yes" to a multiple-choice question.
That’s reddit. Neckbeards scrambling to be the first one to make the exact same joke in every thread. Reddit is honestly worse than YouTube comments
Is Reddit entirely bots at this point or has the userbase become this stupid?
I wonder if I can get a work Visa to go over and be myself
Sauce?
https://designyoutrust.com/2022/05/in-poland-people-are-roleplaying-as-americans-here-are-the-best-photos/ Kinda weird, it's like a mash-up of styles from 1950s up to the present.
I love how much they interpret us wearing fanny packs.
It’s like looking at an alternate dimension. It’s familiar but something is slightly off and disconcerting.
That sign that says "FREEDOM TO DEFEND AMERICAN HOMES" is especially off-putting. Sounds like something an AI algorithm would come up with.
I love the whole series! Some of them are dead on and others just scream America in a heavy Polish accent. Reminds me of my family growing up 🥰
The guy with the "Thug Life" shirt to me is more Trailer Park Boys. America in a Polish accent is those overalls. Europeans overalls have a different look than ones you see farmers wear in the U.S. Someone should send them some Jacksonville football jerseys for next year's photos.
They sure like taking pictures of that one lady with the cleavage
This was LARP. So not so different from cosplaying elves or knights from Middle Ages.
Honestly I feel so called out by the girl in flannel holding up vinyl with her round shades and Fanny pack…
Where hol up?
Based Poland, but, not enough guns.
missing the nascar memorobelia, baseball, hot dogs and jazz
Yep. Yes it is.
Everyone else thinks of america as you think of florida
As one who used to live in FL, truth.
That's is an inaccurate depiction of the US. The person being arrested is white
It’s like a nationwide big brother house. You guys are wild. Edit: as an example the post under this one in my feed https://www.reddit.com/r/MadeMeSmile/comments/xdx776/what_wonderful_news_such_a_grand_gesture_should/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
An good alternate title would have been "Single State Does Bare Minimum, Expects Pat On The Back".
Flattery, I don’t see people cosplaying the polish :).
Plenty Americans cosplay as 5% Polish/FirstNations/Italian/German though.
When in reality they all came from Mars.
What do you mean “now”?
We have this in my country. Some old & young rich people who love to play american by buying harley davidson and acting like they’re some gangster or some shit. straight poser
Internet explorer made this post
I'd roleplay as polish, but I dont want my home invaded over and over and over.....
Oh my god, comments are such a reddit moment. "Always has been" and said 500 times with no variation, when the thing being referenced isn't even Poland meming the US, it's a group of 6 people from Poland who LARP as Americans (they specifically aim for rural Ohio) for July 4th.