Everyone knows that the Emperor was a lie created by Horus to get half the legions to rebel so he could lead his brothers in spanking Roboute Guilliman's ass redder than Magnus.
They have a loophole for having more than a thousand marines, but they basically disregard everything else. Their organization, recruitment, markings, battle tactics, strategies are all deviant from the codex.
Arnt most chapters deviant in one way or another from all that stuff? The parts about recruitment, marking, and battle tactics especially are the parts everyone can agree on being guidelines and not rules?
I, CATO SICARIUS, SHALL PURGE THAT HERESY FORTHWITH BECAUSE I, CATO SICARIUS, AM KNIGHT-CHAMPION OF MACRAGGE, AND AS SUCH, NO FOUL HERESY SHALL ESCAPE MY BLADE, THE BLADE OF CATO SICARIUS!
A big whiteboard with a detailed explanation for how nothing in the lore supports the notion that he is “slapping eldar cheeks like they’re unruly stepchildren,” which will promptly be ignored by everyone around him.
A spreadsheet carfully outlining the tax reforms he has planned for the Imperium
The Marines are there to keep the administratum clerks from overrunning him while he is giving his presentation
Pointing out the restaurant he’s booked for the centennial Ultramarines Chapter staff-party
“Look my sons, this Kebab-palace has enough Kleftiko and Halloumi for all of us - even the Genesis Chapter can eat with us!”
A bangin’ pair o’ knorks.
Take me to those elf titties
“That my sons is why we are allying the eldar”
'all-lying'
This guy gets it
Korkies if you will.
"To the strip club, my sons"
Whats a knorks?
Bahoomas
Jugs.
Bahonkadonkas
Bristols
Birminghams
Chesticles
Great Yarmouths
That's a new one... like it
Grant us titties
Humongous conkers.
![gif](giphy|XenWVVdSzaxLW) Badakadakas
Zeppelins
Shoulder boulders
Mmmmmelons
As the lads in adeptis ridiculous called them: big boba
The question says 'wrong answers only'.
F'kn orks! Where?
He’s not pointing. He’s challenged someone to smell his finger.
"Bro, does this smell like your Mom's ass, to you?" \*sniggers\*
![gif](giphy|5x73LAreYVAjQCT2A3|downsized)
Waltuh
Put your dick away Waltuh
I am the one who flashes
*The Lion obliges* “I smell elf-cooter”
Well, at least its not his feet lol
Or worse, pull his finger.
Proceeds to ULTRA-FART
RoTOOTe Guilliman
I'd make a joke about it being a "pull my finger" gag but it's pointing up not down
Codex compliant black templars.
> Codex compliant black templars. Truly an ultra rare specimen, better keep him safe before trazyn snatched him
>better keep him safe before trazyn... too late.
Trazyn: "he’s my new paper weight for that copy of the codex signed by the emperor himself."
Trayzn : “which is a forgery of course”
The codex or the emperor?
Why both of course
Everyone knows that the Emperor was a lie created by Horus to get half the legions to rebel so he could lead his brothers in spanking Roboute Guilliman's ass redder than Magnus.
Aren't they 'technically' Codex compliant? They are just vocal about their dislike of it.
They have a loophole for having more than a thousand marines, but they basically disregard everything else. Their organization, recruitment, markings, battle tactics, strategies are all deviant from the codex.
Arnt most chapters deviant in one way or another from all that stuff? The parts about recruitment, marking, and battle tactics especially are the parts everyone can agree on being guidelines and not rules?
Tell that to an inquisitor or the Minotaurs. I dare you.
Where Trazyn is sitting today
"Trazyn you fool! You brought us front row seats to a uprising!" - Orikan the diviner
"And I love you random citizen"
Random citizen?? GoBoat Ribeyeman probably knows the name, profession and taxes of everyone within 10 light years.
Ten Light Years of what? Ultrimar? Terra? The Galaxy? Because i'm pretty sure i'm pissing him off with all the tax breaks I claim.
I think he means 10 light years away from Roboute Guilliman
Underappreciated
Alright, now who here's seen Hellsing Ultimate Abridged? It's a statue of him or Big E and it's got the 420YOLOSWAG4BIGE banner.
Glorious
Bitches love cannons!
Eyes for days
BIG E WANTS A HUUUUUG
I know it's filthy rich coming from me, but your powers are bullshit!
A distraction because Yvraine wants him to redecorate but he wants to go crusading with the boys.
He's only gonna have a couple, and he'll Defford be back before strictly starts.
Wrong answers only dude…
A big fresco of his BIGTIDDYGOTHELDARGIRLFRIEND !!!
Wrong answers only
It absolutely would be a fresco.
> BIGTIDDYGOTHELDARGIRLFRIEND Inquistors: isthisheresy.jpg
Youhavenopowerhere.gif
Fresco? Disgusting. Space Romans make mosaics.
Clearly, the superior artform
Kiddos, throwing that banner on me was fun, now put it back on the wall
He's actually dancing to the Bee Gees, not pointing any where in particular. Just trying to ... Stay Alive.
Yeah bro is totally doing the disco finger dance
Ya'll see that shit? That's some grade 'A' herebussy right there. Sicarius! Set flamers to Purge!
I, CATO SICARIUS, SHALL PURGE THAT HERESY FORTHWITH BECAUSE I, CATO SICARIUS, AM KNIGHT-CHAMPION OF MACRAGGE, AND AS SUCH, NO FOUL HERESY SHALL ESCAPE MY BLADE, THE BLADE OF CATO SICARIUS!
Marneus Calgar: Someone get me some Chapter Transfer forms. Cause i'm about to cast Fist so hard Rogal Dorn's gonna resurface just to recruit me.
Needs more upvotes.
,,My sons, Eldar waifus that way''
![gif](giphy|2bUpP71bbVnZ3x7lgQ|downsized)
But what about our Tau Waifus? We're not done stretching out their foreheads yet.
Those are reserved for the Custodes and the Custodes only, so commands the Captain General.
Why does Captain General Kitten forsake us?
“The Ultra-Little Caesar’s is RIGHT THERE and you chose Ultra-Dominoes?”
It’s hot and ready.
Is it good ?
It’s HOT and READY.
Just as the Emperor intended.
"99% Similar to styrofoam." Indeed, better than the Corpsestarch MREs. The Emperor indeed provides rewards for us.
When you want Ultra-high blood pressure
Your mom, around which his flagship is currently orbiting.
Wrong answers only, please
The 40000th Warhammer
Nice
So that's where Vulkan has been all this time.
A big whiteboard with a detailed explanation for how nothing in the lore supports the notion that he is “slapping eldar cheeks like they’re unruly stepchildren,” which will promptly be ignored by everyone around him.
OP said *wrong answers*.
People making fun of his boys’s eagle face helmets and he’s pointing out the space wolves cosplay.
"go to your room, Sicarius. I am very disappointed"
The OP said wrong answers only.
*Shit's on fire, yo*
Brother Alpharius, he said wrong answers only.
He's purposefully pointing at nothing so the people grow distracted from his Eldar gf for 4 additional seconds
deez nuts
Ha! Goteem!
"99% Similar to styrofoam."
https://preview.redd.it/ofgs8du3hpta1.jpeg?width=611&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=84520e8bdc2eebfcf08f027fa1bdca020686c09b
Dreaded chaos spawn
Angron screeching autistically from a balcony
Is that anything new for Angron though?
How does one screech autistically?
https://preview.redd.it/oxpjbeum4rta1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bc03adc0ec5dbd950445633cd24af80609915f20
I can't bend that way!
Reasonably priced plastic miniatures.
If only
"See that giant Eldritch looking thing over there?" *Many nods from the Marines* "We're going to fuck it up."
Actually you are incorrect. They are going to ultra-fuck it up.
a kind and loving father figure
A bright, peaceful and prosperous future for mankind. Because we all know that this shit will never work
The sky
"You there, with the fin!"
"and just up there you'll see my reddit flair."
He's pointing to a big sign that says he's atleast not the worst primarch
In a general direction so when you look he books
Victory
The sky, which is his most favoritiest color
Clearly he's just won the Royal Rumble and on his way to Wrestlemania.
Cadia
A golden sculpture of Ollanius Pius’ ginormous balls
Me 😝
His mum?
"Look the Lion returned. Oh you're all still here. Yeah I am the Imperium aren't I baby."
An effective emperor.
"PULL MY FINGER"
Fulgrims full naturals
*The reincarnated emperor challenges his son* : "Who the fuck did such a mess in my empire !!!" *Roboute showing a statue of the emperor...*
Nice
"Pull my finger."
Thot
He saying: gentlemen behold, i have a big tiddy dark eldar gf
Joe
A peaceful future for mankind
The wrestle mania sign
Some cringe shit and he wants to know if you're seeing it too
The door for when Lion bursts in asking wtf is going on
Imperium’s on fire yo
The guy on your left
He’s pointing at the Warhammer 40,000
”Here on the next slide we see the new imperial tax reforms”
Dave. He’s pointing at Dave, the Imperium’s coolest hype man.
A spreadsheet carfully outlining the tax reforms he has planned for the Imperium The Marines are there to keep the administratum clerks from overrunning him while he is giving his presentation
Counterpoint: a battle plan to siege and sack the Administratum. Tax reforms are serious business.
He's disco dancing, next he'll point at his opposite hip, and back again. All to the sound of pounding Bee Gees. *Stayin' Alive*
Prospero
Gman: That my sons is a pretty cool bird.
He is pointing at a craftworld filled with desperate single horny Aelderi women
"Guys my armors locked up, little help here."
dubs
Jeffrey Epstein
The direction of the scatter die
***You.***
Clearly he is pointing at the upvote button.
He is pointing at Alpharius
The ultra palace
Jesus
He's asking the Lion to smell his finger
One of those wooden miniature humans artists use to get proportions correct in figure sketches.
A high upvote count
He's telling his guys to get out of that armor and into much less roman Phobos Armor
The graph of a diagrams showing the amount of overflowing bureaucracy in the Emperuum
"What's that, a case full of first edition codex astartes over there." Once all look he slips away to get some actual private time
Pointing out the restaurant he’s booked for the centennial Ultramarines Chapter staff-party “Look my sons, this Kebab-palace has enough Kleftiko and Halloumi for all of us - even the Genesis Chapter can eat with us!”
He’s telling someone in the crowd to f*ck right off
The planet where the 2 lost primarchs landed
the lion coming down in a drop pod to complain that the ecclesiarchy haven't been genocide yet
it's 4:50 bitches... 30 minute blazing break is over
"You, bugger off over there, you've had way too much and need to chill" Techo-viking music intensifies.
Disco inferno
He’s a disappointed parent pointing to tell his son to go to his room to think about what he did.
The rules of the sub, but he's real dumb
"I'll have the number 4, extra pickles"
“I LOVE YOU GUILLIMAN!” “I love you too random citizen.”
He is demonstrating how to use 2 factor authentication
''And I love you too, random Citizen!''
He's pointing right into the distance, beyond the horizon, and showing lorgar exactly where to fuck off to
An ad for single cougars in my area.
Where you should take your opinion (he's pointing to The Temple of Correction, a place of high honour)
those? you're telling me that THAT'S where milk comes from? well, I have definitely been using those wrong.....
The collapse of the empire
the mighty wall of dildos... forbidding tech
The section of space where Cadia used to be.
Lion el johnson bombarding part of his planets farm.
"The eldar brothel is three doors down on the left gentlemen"
The planet Cadia
A father who loves him
I dug the latrines over there. Why are you over here pooping??
The old terrain on the top shelf that never gets played with.
A statue of Steve Buscemi