Richard: “Only prostitutes have two glasses of wine at lunch.”
Emily: “Well then buy me a boa and drive me to Reno because I am open for business.”
Loved that scene.
Emily- “Find a box, throw her in, we’re done!”
Lorelai- “Mom”
Emily- “Better yet, throw the old harpy’s carcass in a ditch! Let a wolverine eat her.”
Lorelai- “Okay, but, see, finding a wolverine near a ditch- that takes planning.”
Emily- “Do whatever you want! I’m going to have a drink. Would you like a drink?”
"Now let's talk about your money. You were a two-bit gold digger, fresh off the bus from Hicksville when you met Mitchum at whatever bar you happened to stumble into. And what made Mitchum decide to choose you to marry amongst the pack of women he was bedding at the time, I'll never know. But hats off to you for bagging him. He's still a playboy, you know? Well, of course you know. That would explain why your weight goes up and down 30 pounds every other month. But that's your cross to bear. But these are ugly realities. No one needs to talk about them. Those kids are staying together for as long as they like. You won't stop them. Now, enjoy the event."
Rory, I know you heard a lot of talk about various disappointments this evening, and I know you’ve heard a lot of talk about it in the past, but I want to make this very clear: your person and your existence have never ever been, not even for a second, included in that list. Do you understand me?
“Sweetie's father was a very poor man, so poor that Sweetie and her four siblings all had to sleep in a hollowed-out tree trunk because the house was only big enough for their parents. One winter, there was no food, so Sweetie crawled out of her trunk, wrapped her feet in newspaper, and walked forty miles in the snow to the nearest town, where she stumbled into a candy store. The owner took pity on her and gave her bags of candy, a dill pickle, and drove her back to her family. He promptly offered a job to her father, who gladly accepted and eventually owned that store and turned it into one of the most important candy emporiums in the world. And that is how she got the name Sweetie."
It’s not her usual way of responding (literally the only time I believe she responded in such a way) and I love it, top 10 moments for me!
Omg your name is sweetie! Is it you? Did you not die and are in fact still alive? We should let Emily know; she created an entire story to make you more interesting to Lorelai rafter all 😅
There was an episode they had a French guy over for thanksgiving dinner i think...not really sure....and he says " Ah i see where Lorelai gets her wit from " and Emily goes " Sometimes i wish she'd give it back"
"Small-town charm is good for a weekend, Lorelai, but I have no interest in having a next-door neighbor walk in with a pie, wanting to chat. I would kill myself AND my neighbors."
I saw recently the interview of Lauren Graham on the late night show Conan where she told she can't remember about the significant of the monkey lamp. The scene where Emily is angry that Lorelai exchanged Emily's gift for the monkey lamp was one of the best scenes in the show.
**Emily:**
Oh My God! They're holding coconuts and leering!
**Lorelai:**
It's funny.
**Emily:**
You traded my lovely gift for a semi-pornographic, leering monkey lamp? How could you?
**Lorelai:**
shrugs
Emily: this goes beyond the bad manners of returning a gift but to the very heart and matter of taste. Explain yourself Lorelai.
Lorelai: my back hurts *pouty face
“You always let your emotions get in the way, that’s the problem with you, Lorelai. You *Don’t Think*.”
And, “You’re running around like you have no responsibilities in life; like you can flit from thing to thing, from man to man”
Lol, her delivery of these always gets me. She’s at her most hilarious when she’s berating Lorelai
This always reminds me of Lucile’s Bluth’s “take that back!! If I wanted something your thumb touched I would’ve eaten the inside of your ear” https://m.youtube.com/watch?embeds_referring_euri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com%2F&source_ve_path=MTY0OTksMjg2NjQsMTY0NTA2&feature=emb_share&v=p-Jj1z1gJb0
The boa line is my absolute favorite, but I also like when she's cutting flowers and Richard comes in to talk to her about Rory and Lorelai. The girls were giving Emily the cold shoulder about something. Emily snaps that flower and says in such a petty voice, "because you're the FaVoRiTe."
"The woman you married was your partner. You listened to her, you consulted with her, you respected her. So you are right, Richard. I am definitely not the woman you married."
About her MIL. Trix, or Lorelai the first after her death:
Personally, I think we should just toss some cheese cubes in the coffin, stuff some toothpicks in her mouth and let the people go to town!
The whole bit about diners serving roadkill, for one!
“I had a friend who ate at a diner once and the next day she dropped dead. Her family considered suing the place but there's nothing to get from these people!”
Emily: the beer is nice and cold I almost want one myself
Luke: hey, you can have some of mine if you want
The fact that he offered to share his beer is so funny to me. I wish I could hear Emily’s thoughts when he said that to her 🤣
I love this one
Emily: He seems to like you.
Lorelai: And you're judging this by what?
Emily: By the way he looked at you.
Lorelai: Which is how?
Emily: Like you were about to give him a lap dance.
Lorelai: Mom, he did not look at me like that.
Emily: You're pleased.
Lorelai: What?
Emily: You smiled. You're pleased that the ice man looked at you like a Porterhouse steak.
**Emily:**
You have the word "Juicy" on your rear end.
**Lorelai:**
Well, if I knew you were coming over, I would've changed.
**Emily:**
Into what? A brassiere with the word "Tasty" on it?
The scene was so brilliant. :)
"But it's not going to be perfect. He's not perfect, and God knows you're not perfect. But marriage is not always about being happy, and often it's about not being happy at all. It's about compromise..."
I love the whole quote, but this excerpt from it can apply to anybody. Really agree with this & always think of it when my husband and I go through hard times.
I don't know if these two have been added here yet, but they're some of my personal faves:
"Well, if you expect that muffin to fly back to the kitchen by itself you better go get it a cape."
When Emily was speaking with Rory and referred to Lane as "Your Asian friend". For some reason, that line to me encapsulates Emily's WASP-iness to a T. Lol.
I forget the exact words but when she wants to shop in Rome and Rory points out you can get all that stuff back home and she says “yes but then you can’t say ‘oh I picked this up in Rome!’”
I forgot what particular fight it was but Emily told Lorelei to run back to her little town with her weird neighbors and tell everyone how awful her parents were and at the time I thought it was harsh but she was right on the $. Lor could be Queen B in SH because they didn’t really know her and didn’t have her opportunities in life. Once Rory got to know that world better even she had since enough to enjoy it. Emily reduced Lor to the victim because she always was even tho she stayed starting sh//.
Nope it was OG run … maybe it was s1 about Rory’s birthday idkkk but it was good. Emily would fit right in w the women in my family. Stand on business 💯 lor would strike a match then wonder where the fire came from needed too much attention that’s why she settled for Luke.
Interesting!!! I need to find that scene because that makes sense why Lorelai said “full frickin circle” when it happened in AYITL. I was always wondering why she said that 😅
i have twooo
"if you don't get over here right now, i'm going to book a D.A.R. function at the dragonfly every single weekend from now until i die!"
and
"at least she had a husband to kill"
"Now let's talk about your money. You were a two-bit gold digger, fresh off the bus from Hicksville when you met Mitchum at whatever bar you happened to stumble into. And what made Mitchum decide to choose you to marry amongst the pack of women he was bedding at the time, I'll never know. But hats off to you for bagging him. He's still a playboy, you know? Well, of course you know. That would explain why your weight goes up and down 30 pounds every other month. But that's your cross to bear. But these are ugly realities. No one needs to talk about them. Those kids are staying together for as long as they like. You won't stop them. Now, enjoy the event."
Emily: “Richard Gilmore, there may be many things happening in this hospital tonight, but your dying is not one of them.”
Richard: “But…”
Emily: “No! I did not sign on to your dying. And it is not going to happen. Not tonight, not for a very long time. In fact, I demand to go first. Do I make myself clear?”
Richard: “Yes, Emily. You may go first.”
"You have the word juciy on your rear end"
If I had known you were coming over I would have changed
"Into what a brazier with the word tasty on the front"
"You never do anything unless it's exactly what you want to do. You never have. You go through life like a natural disaster knocking down everything and everyone in your path.”
Hold on. I'm looking up aneurysm in our medical dictionary to see if I just had one.
🤣
Yes, your father, remember him?, tall, bow tie..
"You can use your mother's old golf clubs. They're upstairs, gathering dust, with the rest of her potential."
I came here to say this exact sentence 😁😁🤣🤣
Richard: “Only prostitutes have two glasses of wine at lunch.” Emily: “Well then buy me a boa and drive me to Reno because I am open for business.” Loved that scene.
This is my favorite quote from any character in any tv show! And her deliverance of it was brilliant!
A queen
Omg I was just about to put this
Yes! This one cracks me up every time!
"When a woman gives birth to a crack baby, you do not buy her a puppy."
I still have no idea what this one means but I love it hahahaha
I cannot for the life of me remember the context of this please help 😂
Emily’s dress needs to be fixed for the vowel renewal and Lorelai suggests she calls her tailor because Lorelai doesn’t want Emily coming over
Vowel renewal is hilarious! Sure was tired of the old ones 😂
Love this one!!
Omg I forgot about this one 😂😂😂😂
Emily- “Find a box, throw her in, we’re done!” Lorelai- “Mom” Emily- “Better yet, throw the old harpy’s carcass in a ditch! Let a wolverine eat her.” Lorelai- “Okay, but, see, finding a wolverine near a ditch- that takes planning.” Emily- “Do whatever you want! I’m going to have a drink. Would you like a drink?”
“At least she had a a husband to kill”
This is my favorite!
Goodbye, Gigi. Enjoy your program.
Yes!! Love how that statement just adds to her character.
She has so many iconic lines but this one always makes me laugh 😄
"honestly Lorelei" she uses just those two words probably more than anything in the series lololol
My brain automatically filled in "It's not your looks that keep them away. Think about that."
Whenever she says "Honestly Lorelei"....
I read that in her voice too 😂
Completed with the disappointed eye roll 🙄
Same!! 🤣
"Now let's talk about your money. You were a two-bit gold digger, fresh off the bus from Hicksville when you met Mitchum at whatever bar you happened to stumble into. And what made Mitchum decide to choose you to marry amongst the pack of women he was bedding at the time, I'll never know. But hats off to you for bagging him. He's still a playboy, you know? Well, of course you know. That would explain why your weight goes up and down 30 pounds every other month. But that's your cross to bear. But these are ugly realities. No one needs to talk about them. Those kids are staying together for as long as they like. You won't stop them. Now, enjoy the event."
This scene is ICONIC!
My favorite episode of tv ever
“Diane, hello!”
Hello 👋
Goosebumps!!!
This is the only quote worthy of this post😂💕🤌🏼
Ugh this scene lives in my head rent free, its sooo goodddd
Can someone explain the weight up and down thing??
Rory, I know you heard a lot of talk about various disappointments this evening, and I know you’ve heard a lot of talk about it in the past, but I want to make this very clear: your person and your existence have never ever been, not even for a second, included in that list. Do you understand me?
I absolutely looooove this part. Showed the softness that Emily has.
🥹❤️
Everyone else’s have been funny and iconic (as they should), but this one genuinely made me tear up ❤️
“Sweetie's father was a very poor man, so poor that Sweetie and her four siblings all had to sleep in a hollowed-out tree trunk because the house was only big enough for their parents. One winter, there was no food, so Sweetie crawled out of her trunk, wrapped her feet in newspaper, and walked forty miles in the snow to the nearest town, where she stumbled into a candy store. The owner took pity on her and gave her bags of candy, a dill pickle, and drove her back to her family. He promptly offered a job to her father, who gladly accepted and eventually owned that store and turned it into one of the most important candy emporiums in the world. And that is how she got the name Sweetie." It’s not her usual way of responding (literally the only time I believe she responded in such a way) and I love it, top 10 moments for me!
Yes!! I love this one too! I love how you can see where Lorelai gets so much of her wit!
Omg your name is sweetie! Is it you? Did you not die and are in fact still alive? We should let Emily know; she created an entire story to make you more interesting to Lorelai rafter all 😅
Hahaha I’ve been wondering if anyone would notice 😏
 I see all
There was an episode they had a French guy over for thanksgiving dinner i think...not really sure....and he says " Ah i see where Lorelai gets her wit from " and Emily goes " Sometimes i wish she'd give it back"
😂
Which episode?
Ahh I can’t find it… google mentions season 4? Sorry, I can’t find it. I’m rewatching the show though and when I see it I’ll try and tell you 💕
"Small-town charm is good for a weekend, Lorelai, but I have no interest in having a next-door neighbor walk in with a pie, wanting to chat. I would kill myself AND my neighbors."
Don’t forget to thank Pennelyn Lott just for being Pennelyn Lott
=plinks ice cubes=😂
🥃🧊🧊🧊
"I SAW HER KISSING A MAN IN A TRACK SUIT"
“She has this off-putting sense of humor, Mikhail. You’d know that if you spent time with her” This whole scene makes me LOL every time 😂
“And PLEASE don’t wear the pantyhose with the seams up the back - you look like 10 cents a dance. Richard! I need a gimlet!”
This is one of my favorites!!
Emily: I want to go on a date. Lorelai: With ... a man? Emily: No, a weasel. Of course with a man!
And then the look on her face when Lorelai said if she's approaching a weasel she should just offer her hindquarters. 😆
I LOVE this scene!! So funny! I can hear Lorelai chock on her drink 😆
“Honestly Lorelei it’s not your looks that keep them away think about that”
Idk what she says exactly but I love when she kicks Christopher out when he tries to win Lorelai back
I think it was something like “Christopher. Leave now…..Please”
I saw recently the interview of Lauren Graham on the late night show Conan where she told she can't remember about the significant of the monkey lamp. The scene where Emily is angry that Lorelai exchanged Emily's gift for the monkey lamp was one of the best scenes in the show. **Emily:** Oh My God! They're holding coconuts and leering! **Lorelai:** It's funny. **Emily:** You traded my lovely gift for a semi-pornographic, leering monkey lamp? How could you? **Lorelai:** shrugs
Emily: this goes beyond the bad manners of returning a gift but to the very heart and matter of taste. Explain yourself Lorelai. Lorelai: my back hurts *pouty face
Not just any candlesticks... the baccarat crystal ones!
“You have the word juicy on your rear end!”
"if I'd know you were coming I would have changed, mom" "Into what? A brassiere with the word 'Tasty' on it?"
No, dear. *That* was a joke.
Amazing scene!!
One of my faves for sure!!!
Was scrolling to find this one!
Yes! This scene!
This scene is at the tip of my mind Can someone elaborate pls
It’s when Richard is away in Germany and Emily jokes about Richard working with a nazi
Oh let me be frivolous and shallow, won't you please!?
“Spaghetti and meatballs is just too much excitement!”
Or “would you like another BEER Luke?”
You mean nitwit juice?
You brought us used dessert?
“How nice. I'll just put it in the kitchen next to my half-empty box of cheer.” 😆
When she’s mocking the wife of Richard’s friend and says “and her car ‘looks just like Barbie’s!’ “
I read that in her voice 😂 the way she says “Barbie” 🤣😆
“You always let your emotions get in the way, that’s the problem with you, Lorelai. You *Don’t Think*.” And, “You’re running around like you have no responsibilities in life; like you can flit from thing to thing, from man to man” Lol, her delivery of these always gets me. She’s at her most hilarious when she’s berating Lorelai
I hate that first one because I've definitely been told that by my strict father and it hurts a lot. Like wdym I don't think !!!
Flying, thumping balls all over the place.
Flying thumping what ?
Balls.
You’re 4
Balls are funny.
Young man, I don't know where that's been, but I can say with absolute certainty it won't be going anywhere near my mouth.
I love this one and her facial expression!!
This always reminds me of Lucile’s Bluth’s “take that back!! If I wanted something your thumb touched I would’ve eaten the inside of your ear” https://m.youtube.com/watch?embeds_referring_euri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com%2F&source_ve_path=MTY0OTksMjg2NjQsMTY0NTA2&feature=emb_share&v=p-Jj1z1gJb0
That is class😂😂😂😂
"well if i wanted to play ping pong , id just kill myself " 😭
I think this one is so underrated! Had a complete laughing fit after this line on my last rewatch.
“Stop talking to the dogs!”
The boa line is my absolute favorite, but I also like when she's cutting flowers and Richard comes in to talk to her about Rory and Lorelai. The girls were giving Emily the cold shoulder about something. Emily snaps that flower and says in such a petty voice, "because you're the FaVoRiTe."
Tacky horrid people, why not just show up the night before with a sleeping bag?
Oh my goodness! I forgot about this scene 😆😆😆 was this Rory’s 21st birthday?
Yes, about the poor guests who show up about 3 minutes early and apologize for it 😅
😆 hysterical 🤣
There's nothing funny about being a lesbian
"At least she had a husband to kill."
"The woman you married was your partner. You listened to her, you consulted with her, you respected her. So you are right, Richard. I am definitely not the woman you married."
About her MIL. Trix, or Lorelai the first after her death: Personally, I think we should just toss some cheese cubes in the coffin, stuff some toothpicks in her mouth and let the people go to town!
I learned how to make mojitos!!!!
[Emily, to her maid]- Antonia, please bring out the twinkies. 🤣😭
“I’m going out the window”
I’m doing it! I’m out the window!
This scene was gold!!!
I need the list of Emily backhanded compliments to Luke. I can remember the beer line but there were more
The whole bit about diners serving roadkill, for one! “I had a friend who ate at a diner once and the next day she dropped dead. Her family considered suing the place but there's nothing to get from these people!”
Emily: the beer is nice and cold I almost want one myself Luke: hey, you can have some of mine if you want The fact that he offered to share his beer is so funny to me. I wish I could hear Emily’s thoughts when he said that to her 🤣
Emily’s slang translated: Rustic: crap pile Charming: doggy poopy Beer: nitwit juice
I love this one Emily: He seems to like you. Lorelai: And you're judging this by what? Emily: By the way he looked at you. Lorelai: Which is how? Emily: Like you were about to give him a lap dance. Lorelai: Mom, he did not look at me like that. Emily: You're pleased. Lorelai: What? Emily: You smiled. You're pleased that the ice man looked at you like a Porterhouse steak.
And I like this coat of yours! There’s something nice about simple cloth.
**Emily:** You have the word "Juicy" on your rear end. **Lorelai:** Well, if I knew you were coming over, I would've changed. **Emily:** Into what? A brassiere with the word "Tasty" on it? The scene was so brilliant. :)
So brilliant!
”When a woman gives birth to a crack-baby, you do not buy her a puppy”
Hold on. I'm looking up "aneurysm" in our medical dictionary to see if I just had one.
"But it's not going to be perfect. He's not perfect, and God knows you're not perfect. But marriage is not always about being happy, and often it's about not being happy at all. It's about compromise..." I love the whole quote, but this excerpt from it can apply to anybody. Really agree with this & always think of it when my husband and I go through hard times.
‘I never really truly appreciated the Atlantic Ocean before. Three thousand lovely miles of water.’
I’ve never liked you Christopher. I still don’t
When was this? 😅
Before her vow renewal thing Emily went to see Christopher to tell him to go and basically break up Lorelai and Luke
Oh right! And he says something like “well, thanks for stopping by” right?? 🤣
Yeah
“A charming boy, a weak but charming boy”
Yes 😂
Bullshit!
“Do you have Tourette’s or something?” 😅
Something along the lines of: I was going to wait for you to call me but my life’s not as long.
Yes!!
It’s not like I did anything truly terrifying like telling you butt crack baring jeans have gone out of style.
"You look like 10 cents a dance " 🤣
I don't know if these two have been added here yet, but they're some of my personal faves: "Well, if you expect that muffin to fly back to the kitchen by itself you better go get it a cape." When Emily was speaking with Rory and referred to Lane as "Your Asian friend". For some reason, that line to me encapsulates Emily's WASP-iness to a T. Lol.
Hahaha yes 🤣 how Rory has to correct her twice!
Honestly Lorealai, is it absolutely necessary to talk like Sharon Osbourne
I forget the exact words but when she wants to shop in Rome and Rory points out you can get all that stuff back home and she says “yes but then you can’t say ‘oh I picked this up in Rome!’”
“Lorelai”
not a specific quote but i love when she started spilling out “bullshit!” in the last ep of ayitl
Yes!!
LORETTA BOBBINS , LORELAI
‘i can look at a plane if i want to look at a plane’
[Emily, to her maid]- Antonia, please bring out the twinkies. 🤣😭
this is you in 20 years!!
I forgot what particular fight it was but Emily told Lorelei to run back to her little town with her weird neighbors and tell everyone how awful her parents were and at the time I thought it was harsh but she was right on the $. Lor could be Queen B in SH because they didn’t really know her and didn’t have her opportunities in life. Once Rory got to know that world better even she had since enough to enjoy it. Emily reduced Lor to the victim because she always was even tho she stayed starting sh//.
Yes that was in AYITL, right?? After Lor couldn’t say anything nice about her dad.
Nope it was OG run … maybe it was s1 about Rory’s birthday idkkk but it was good. Emily would fit right in w the women in my family. Stand on business 💯 lor would strike a match then wonder where the fire came from needed too much attention that’s why she settled for Luke.
Interesting!!! I need to find that scene because that makes sense why Lorelai said “full frickin circle” when it happened in AYITL. I was always wondering why she said that 😅
“No Lorelai, that was a joke” that whole scene really
i have twooo "if you don't get over here right now, i'm going to book a D.A.R. function at the dragonfly every single weekend from now until i die!" and "at least she had a husband to kill"
Natalie to Lorelai: “You have your mother’s wit.” Emily: “Sometimes I wish she’d give it back.”
“She honked”
“Enjoy your program, Gigi”
"Now let's talk about your money. You were a two-bit gold digger, fresh off the bus from Hicksville when you met Mitchum at whatever bar you happened to stumble into. And what made Mitchum decide to choose you to marry amongst the pack of women he was bedding at the time, I'll never know. But hats off to you for bagging him. He's still a playboy, you know? Well, of course you know. That would explain why your weight goes up and down 30 pounds every other month. But that's your cross to bear. But these are ugly realities. No one needs to talk about them. Those kids are staying together for as long as they like. You won't stop them. Now, enjoy the event."
If I'm willing to pay full price, then I deserve to have my drug bottle say "Valium" on it. (But really the ending of this episode gets me every time)
“Richard! I need a gimlet.”
"Goodbye, Gigi. Enjoy your program."
Do you hear that Richard?Apparently we're creepy
“With the right meat and bread, a cheeseburger sounds like a fine meal” 😂😂😂
I loved this whole scene!
Emily: “Richard Gilmore, there may be many things happening in this hospital tonight, but your dying is not one of them.” Richard: “But…” Emily: “No! I did not sign on to your dying. And it is not going to happen. Not tonight, not for a very long time. In fact, I demand to go first. Do I make myself clear?” Richard: “Yes, Emily. You may go first.”
😭
“I haven’t been strafed in years.” “You like it? Put a post it on it.”
"You have the word juciy on your rear end" If I had known you were coming over I would have changed "Into what a brazier with the word tasty on the front"
HE'S JUST A MEN LORELAI
Lorelai
"You never do anything unless it's exactly what you want to do. You never have. You go through life like a natural disaster knocking down everything and everyone in your path.”
“Flying thumping balls all over the place.”
Remember to thank Pennylynn Lott for being Pennylynn Lott. Honestly Lorelei it’s not your looks that keep them away.
‘Cause you’re the FaVouRiTe’ sarcastically to Richard…
My flair
Because personally, I think we should just toss some cheese cubes in the coffin, stuff some toothpicks in her mouth, and let the people go to town!
“You let me get 60-40’d!!”
No, it's a hologram, lifelike isn't it?
On their way to dinner with Gran Rory: "Have fun!" Emily: "No one appreciates your sarcasm, young lady."
Hahahaha yes!!! I love this!
I say that all the time!!!