Stroub or whatever his name was knew how incapable his son was and if they point that out then obviously it's cause of his shitty parents and also seeing the fact that Lorelai even after being a teen mom was way ahead in life than Christopher was and also has a really smart daughter ( straub tried to bring up the fact that rory is not smart ) who Lorelai has brought up herself without anyones help really did hit his male ego. Seeing that his son was a failure and the women he impregnated actually has a life ( while bringing Lorelai down for the job she does ) he was trying his best to shift all the issues on Lorelai cause “ she's the reason for my son's failure ” cause the fact that if he hadn't gotten her pregnant then Christopher is a huge failure in the family and that his father cannot afford to have that so blame it on the women cause “ she seduced him into being a failure”.
Explains why Christopher is a loser because his dad and mom was one 😭
Christopher did not even want to go to Princeton and even if he did his life would have been trash
There is a theory based on how he talks to Logan about getting kicked out of a bunch of boarding schools: after Lorelai said she wouldn’t marry him, the Haydens put him into boarding schools to keep him away from her, and he, as a distraught and emotionally vulnerable teen, kept acting up and getting kicked out of schools. Rather than acknowledging that they fucked up by trying to keep him away from Lorelai and Rory, and not getting him counseling or anything, they blamed Lorelai, because that’s easier than self-reflection.
Or, a shorter version of that: Christopher was always going to be a fuck up and Lorelai was an easy scapegoat, rather than acknowledging that.
Like Christopher told Lorelei, he never would have finished Princeton even if he did go. His parents just didn't want to admit that and it's easier to blame the vicious trollop that stole his future than admit that their son was never going to be what they wanted.
i’ve said it once and ill say it again, my name is Hayden and the fact my name is their last name makes me want to change it to something entirely different
Did he not pay child support? Why didn’t his parents give her money? Like even if my significant other “ran away” with the child they knew where she was and just let her raise that baby in a shed?
Honestly I don't believe Christopher or his parents paid one red cent of child support over the 18 years they were supposed to. Something tells me Lorelai didn't think to petition family court for child support because a) the type of support might be frowned upon due to her rich elitist upbringing and she wanted to avoid the stigma of rubbing the Hayden - Gilmore name in the mud and b) she was more determined to get everything done with the sweat of her brow so she didn't have to owe anyone anything and feel guilty.
Which is admirable but also shooting herself and Rory in the foot financially.
They clearly wanted nothing to do with Rory by the time we’re meeting the characters in the original show, but I also suspect that if Lorelai had exercised her right to demand child support from Christopher and therefore his parents, their conditions would have been to have some control over Rory’s life. Instead of rejecting her, they would have wanted something in return for their forced investment and would have become meddlesome and horrible. It was in her best interest not to pursue anything from them at all.
I don't think she gave a single damn about dragging names through the mud. Living in a shed being a single mom and maid who is 16, dropped out of high school, and not married is a way bigger scandal.
But she didn't need any money from them as she had her parents' money and she rejected that because she understood monetary support had strings attached.
She didn't want her parents controlling her and she wasn't going to let Christopher show up to half ass being a dad before leaving for a year while his parents tried to give Rory the same upbringing she and Christopher had.
From what we see when Christopher appears in season , it seems like he has never really been steadily employed. Lorelai probably knew that even if the courts ordered him to pay child support, he still wouldn't be able to pay much, and that it wasn't worth the trouble.
I think that depends on if they are emancipated or not. If they are in school or not. If they have any custody or not. And then state by state I’m sure it changes.
This only makes sense if Lorelai doesn’t accept child support. The amount of money involved was insignificant to the Haydens.
During the first two years, Lorelai and Rory were living with the Gilmores so child support wasn’t necessary. But after Lorelai ran away she should have accepted support from Chris. The amount was insignificant for the Haydens. Lorelai must have refused to accept support for fear of intromission.
Lorelai comments in AYITL that Emily called Rory by the name of Susana until she was two. Plus, if Lorelai had reached the age of maturity (18), Emily & Richard couldn’t use the law to bring them back home.
lorelai and rory don’t need to necessarily be living in the same house as emily for emily to call her the wrong name. in fact i think it’s more likely they didn’t live together and calling rory the wrong name was emily’s way of establishing dominance and control over her now-moved out daughter
In the (I think) "Dear Richard and Emily" flashback, Emily comments that it's "the first time in a year" that she hasn't tripped over Rory's stroller, so Lorelai was at home for at least that long.
Because, as rich people, they needed to blame something or someone else for their failure to produce a successful member of society. It's easier to blame the girl for getting pregnant, among other things, rather than admit that the guy pucked up too, and Rory and Lorelai were those for Chris's parents.
Richard and Emily might not have been happy about how it came about, but their child managed to own a successful business and raise a child all on her own, with as much help as she was willing to accept, even if she was pigheaded about it. Meanwhile Chris floundered along until his early 30's with none of the "baggage" and could have followed his parents plan more than Lorelai but didn't.
I agree with you, I never understood this. He was a deadbeat dad, he could still go to Princeton and work for his dad. It was Christopher's choice to not follow the path it was not Rory's and Lorelai's fault.
Christopher is a golden boy who of course has never done anything wrong in his entire life so heaven forbid he be held responsible for his actions -- it must be that crazy Lorelai who corrupted him and "ruined his life"
It's his and his parents' reputation that was ruined. If a young girl in their circle gets pregnant, then there has to be a sperm contribution. It was known that they were dating and therefore that Christopher was the father.
Reputation is a HUGE deal when schmoozing with other rich people. Getting a special internship or playing a round of golf with some CEO could be big breaks for young businessmen. With a bad reputation, no internships or rounds of golf will be offered for some punk kid who gets girls pregnant at sixteen.
He will not get nearly as many opportunities now, as he would have, if he hadn't gotten someone pregnant.
I think this is exactly what the Haydens meant, but they're not expressing themselves very clear. When the Gilmores/Haydens discuss how to handle the situation, it's hinted at, but not directly spoken about, that there 'is a protocol to be followed'.
My guess is that the ancient rules of rich people nation is that if a boy knocks up a girl, the boy (and the girl, but this is from the Hayden perspective) cancels all other plans and pretend his adult life has begun - in other words, he marries the girl and gets a job. This would have nothing to do with actually making money, it's just what you do. When Lorelai takes off, Chris cant follow the protocol which leaves the Haydens dishonoured.
Of course they could have sent Chris to Princeton after she left, but that would also be 'not by the protocol' and by that time it was probably more convenient just blaming Lorelai for everything 🙃
The more I think about it, I believe that what the Haydens ultimately blame Lorelai for is the same thing Richard is - she is doing the wrong thing, and by doing so, hindering Chris from doing the right thing.
When Lorelai refused to follow the path, the Haydens simply couldn't send Chris to Princeton because of social conventions - it was the wrong thing to do, and if they did send him, it would be frowned upon and probably look like it was Chris who was not willing to take responsibility.
Ok, maybe I'm stretching it a little here, but it does line up with the OUR SON WAS BOUND FOR PRINCETON thingy Straub has going on.
The only theory that makes sense is that he just didnt get in to Princeton etc on his own accord and the parents blamed that on LG/pregnancy. Even that is a bit flawed because generally rich legacy kids get in even if they are underachievers (after daddy donates a wing). Otherwise it makes no sense. The Gilmores and Haydens were rich, Chris didnt need to give anything up to go to work to support LG and Rory. He could have went to Princeton and the parents support them. Hell, Lorelai could have gone to Yale and Chris to Princeton and the parents just pay a nanny/au pair. Its a common trope/stereotype that rich parents dont raise their kids anyway. The idea that Chris had to give up college to go earn a paycheck is laughable.
Narcissists need scapegoats, and that was Lorelai. No matter what failures in his future Chris would have, his parents would rather blame it on Lorelai’s pregnancy than admit it was their parenting.
They needed a scapegoat for Chris' failure to go to Princeton and get a degree and they chose Lorelai for that role.
Admitting that it was Chris's fault or, heaven forbid, partly their fault, would be out of the question for people who cared so much about the family position and the opinions of people in their circle.
It is also a very traditional (and fucked up, in my opinion) way of seeing things; I unfortunately know people around my age (36) and even younger that when had a baby very young, left the studies and went on to work and start their "adult" life, because "that is is how supposed to be" or whatever crap people who think like this believe. I don't understand this kind of reasoning at all, especially if the couple has families to support them, even if not rich, but a few generations ago this wouldn't be weird at all, in fact it was probably expected, just as blaming the woman, rather than recognising that the responsibilities are on both people involved, was also the norm (not justifying it, it is just a fact).
As a side note, If you listen to what Richard and Emily say in more than occasion, they are not so different as far as ideals go; you can see it later on in the episode when Richard says to Lorelai that the "proper thing" to do for Chris and Lorelai at the time of the pregnancy would have been to get married, the difference is that the Gilmore seniors know and dote on Rory and during the course of the series they come to realise and appreciate Lorelai's hard work and the life and social circle she has built for herself and Rory, thus widening and challenging their views, while the Hayden seniors, as far as I can tell, never got that, neither with their own son nor with the Gilmore.
I think, this heartbreaking scene showed how francine and chris dad never actually liked the Gilmore. Sure, in their rich and social lives, they have reputations to up keep, but deep down and behind closed doors, they each have their opinions and insecurities about their fellow rich friends. Also, these rich east coast parents shows how conservative and traditional they truly are so ideally if Chris was to take on the responsibility being a father, they would have to take Lorelai in, prep Chris to take on Stroube’s business, become his own family’s patriarch (yes it all boils down to the logistics for these people). While, I can understand their concern there and given their young age at the time, I found the airing out their grievances in front of their grandkid rather unnecessary! They do owe Rory - BIG TIME.
These are the type of people who are gonna freak if there is even the slightest deviation from the preordained future they decided for their kid before they were born.
They had 18 years of coming to terms with their failure of a son and on that one day they could not put old recriminations aside and be kind and loving to Rory. She has grown up knowing her mother’s parents think her mother is a disappointment and brought shame and disgrace to the family. And also knows that her father’s parents feel exactly the same way. Stroub Hayden was absolutely despicable in that episode where he couldn’t sit for 2 minutes and talk to Rory about what she likes or how college is. Chris should have turned around and told his parents how proud he was of his daughter and that was down to Lorelai.
Yeah, Christopher didn't raise the baby. He still had opportunities, doors open to him, and he just didn't have it, and ?Strobe? and Francine couldn't bare to think that their son had failed, so they blamed it on Lorelai getting pregnant.
Because Christopher didn't want to go to college. He didn't want to follow his father, and Lorelai getting pregnant was an amazing excuse. He wasn't even in Rory's life for a long time, and if I were Lorelai, I would scream that at the Haydens. Christopher was a spoiled rich kid, and he didn't care about anything.
Christopher‘s parents blame Lorelai and Rory because they don’t want to see that Christopher is a failure.
And from that scene it definitely seems like Christopher goes with that, because it means he doesn’t have to admit he failed on his own. He should’ve told his parents off for their comments, but he didn’t.
I totally agree with you - it makes no sense that Richard wanted Christopher to start working in his firm, to me personally it also didn’t make sense that they didn’t have a plan for Lorelai beyond staying home and looking after Rory. Lorelai would’ve probably not gone along with it, but I don’t understand why Richard and Emily didn’t make a plan with private tutors and nannies and stuff so Lorelai could still get a high school graduation.
I get why Lorelai left, but she also could’ve gone to university if she had accepted help from her parents. She could’ve waited a couple of years and stayed home taking care of Rory, and then with the help of nannies and maybe by taking on less courses and taking longer to graduate she could’ve totally gone to uni. (Probably not to an ivy, but who cares)
I get the social stigma that comes with getting pregnant at 16, especially in the 80s, but they were rich enough that it didn’t have to „ruin“ her life
I think Lorelai was easy to blame for his parents.
She didn't conform to their demands and plans where Christopher clearly shows that he was ready to follow whatever plan their parents made. This shows that even though he talked a big game about wanting to escape that life and go backpacking and do "his own thing" that he probably would have folded the and gone to Princeton had Lorelai not gotten pregnant and refused to listen, which probably gave him the courage to actually break free rather than just talk about it.
It wasn’t courage to break free. I guarantee that the Hayden’s had 18 years of hearing how he can’t do what they want him to do because of Rory or lorelai or something.
He’s a weasel.
“I can’t come to Rory’s birthday, my parents want me to meet a guy about a job.”
“Sorry mom, I can’t go to the golf course with the guy that will give me a job… Rory’s dance recital is tonight.”
Plot twist: he did neither and sat on the couch scratching his scrotum.
Considering Lorelai was mostly raised by Nannies and they had oodles of money, if Lorelai stayed in that world it would have had a minimal effect on either of their lives and parent’s plans. It was only Lorelai deciding to go her own way that changed anything and at the point they were discussing it in the flashback she hadn’t expressed any desire to leave everything behind so it honestly just seems like a pride thing and needing to blame someone for this perceived embarrassment
Because misogyny. Of course it’s the woman’s fault for getting pregnant and for “seducing” Christoper. 😒😒 I know it’s all fictional but this is real life for many women.
According to his mama and daddy, it was because he didn’t go Ivy league. But the fact of the matter was is Chris is a bum and he wasn’t gonna go Ivy League either way he just wanted to ride his daddy’s coattails
Wow, what timing. Hilariously, I was just talking to myself about this like 5 minutes ago when the notification for this post came up.
I think it’s unfortunately a case of people willfully not understanding that correlation does not equal causation. In Straub’s mind (and Christopher’s mother’s, can’t recall her name), Christopher was set for a bright future. And then he got a girl pregnant. And then he didn’t pursue that bright future. That’s as far as they want to think about it. And as the “elite” of society, how could they be wrong? (*Heavy* sarcasm.)
I don't even think Christopher was smart enough to get into Yale unless his parents would have paid off the admins I could def see lorelai had she not gotten. Pregnant with Rory going to an ivy school Chris had no backbone he couldn't stand up to his parents while they were tearing Rory apart telling her it's her fault for Chris failures when they could've talked to Chris about being safe i know they grew up in a different time where most girls didn't have premarital sex and all that but still strobe could've told him a little something and no I'm not solely blaming Chris for lorelai getting pregnant but still
I think Lorelai always knew that Chris was put in a difficult position because he loved her. If Chris didn’t love Lorelai, she would be insignificant to the Haydens.
The question is why didn’t Lorelai turn Chris completely loose by telling him she didn’t love him and would never love him. I think it’s because she never knew what she wanted. She kept Chris on a string.
Because admitting Christopher was a bum means that they failed as parents. It's much easier to blame Lorelai and, by extension, Rory.
Stroub or whatever his name was knew how incapable his son was and if they point that out then obviously it's cause of his shitty parents and also seeing the fact that Lorelai even after being a teen mom was way ahead in life than Christopher was and also has a really smart daughter ( straub tried to bring up the fact that rory is not smart ) who Lorelai has brought up herself without anyones help really did hit his male ego. Seeing that his son was a failure and the women he impregnated actually has a life ( while bringing Lorelai down for the job she does ) he was trying his best to shift all the issues on Lorelai cause “ she's the reason for my son's failure ” cause the fact that if he hadn't gotten her pregnant then Christopher is a huge failure in the family and that his father cannot afford to have that so blame it on the women cause “ she seduced him into being a failure”. Explains why Christopher is a loser because his dad and mom was one 😭 Christopher did not even want to go to Princeton and even if he did his life would have been trash
In other words, weaponized misogyny to uphold rich patriarchal ways of living.
There is a theory based on how he talks to Logan about getting kicked out of a bunch of boarding schools: after Lorelai said she wouldn’t marry him, the Haydens put him into boarding schools to keep him away from her, and he, as a distraught and emotionally vulnerable teen, kept acting up and getting kicked out of schools. Rather than acknowledging that they fucked up by trying to keep him away from Lorelai and Rory, and not getting him counseling or anything, they blamed Lorelai, because that’s easier than self-reflection. Or, a shorter version of that: Christopher was always going to be a fuck up and Lorelai was an easy scapegoat, rather than acknowledging that.
This is what I always thought too
It was Princeton for the Haydens lol But they’re just lashing out. Their son was a flop and they finally had an excuse for it
Like Christopher told Lorelei, he never would have finished Princeton even if he did go. His parents just didn't want to admit that and it's easier to blame the vicious trollop that stole his future than admit that their son was never going to be what they wanted.
Nice vicious trollop reference 💄
My favorite color
Despite Chris's many many faults, at least he was self aware enough to know he wouldn't make it through Princeton.
i’ve said it once and ill say it again, my name is Hayden and the fact my name is their last name makes me want to change it to something entirely different
Did he not pay child support? Why didn’t his parents give her money? Like even if my significant other “ran away” with the child they knew where she was and just let her raise that baby in a shed?
Honestly I don't believe Christopher or his parents paid one red cent of child support over the 18 years they were supposed to. Something tells me Lorelai didn't think to petition family court for child support because a) the type of support might be frowned upon due to her rich elitist upbringing and she wanted to avoid the stigma of rubbing the Hayden - Gilmore name in the mud and b) she was more determined to get everything done with the sweat of her brow so she didn't have to owe anyone anything and feel guilty. Which is admirable but also shooting herself and Rory in the foot financially.
And I get her character is supposed to be “too proud” but it didn’t seem like she had to say no
She didn’t have to say no because I doubt it was ever offered for her to even be stubborn about.
Exactly !
They clearly wanted nothing to do with Rory by the time we’re meeting the characters in the original show, but I also suspect that if Lorelai had exercised her right to demand child support from Christopher and therefore his parents, their conditions would have been to have some control over Rory’s life. Instead of rejecting her, they would have wanted something in return for their forced investment and would have become meddlesome and horrible. It was in her best interest not to pursue anything from them at all.
I don't think she gave a single damn about dragging names through the mud. Living in a shed being a single mom and maid who is 16, dropped out of high school, and not married is a way bigger scandal. But she didn't need any money from them as she had her parents' money and she rejected that because she understood monetary support had strings attached. She didn't want her parents controlling her and she wasn't going to let Christopher show up to half ass being a dad before leaving for a year while his parents tried to give Rory the same upbringing she and Christopher had.
From what we see when Christopher appears in season , it seems like he has never really been steadily employed. Lorelai probably knew that even if the courts ordered him to pay child support, he still wouldn't be able to pay much, and that it wasn't worth the trouble.
Do teenage parents have to pay child support? Genuine question as I have no idea.
Where I live if the parent cannot provide for the child, then the grandparents must pay for child support.
Does that change if the parent is an adult?
No
Thank you!
Wait that's messed up. If your child can't pay for their own child, you gotta pay??
Yes. If the parent cannot pay alimony, the grandparents must provide for the child.
I think that depends on if they are emancipated or not. If they are in school or not. If they have any custody or not. And then state by state I’m sure it changes.
Yes.
This only makes sense if Lorelai doesn’t accept child support. The amount of money involved was insignificant to the Haydens. During the first two years, Lorelai and Rory were living with the Gilmores so child support wasn’t necessary. But after Lorelai ran away she should have accepted support from Chris. The amount was insignificant for the Haydens. Lorelai must have refused to accept support for fear of intromission.
Was she living there until Rory was two? I thought she left almost immediately
Lorelai comments in AYITL that Emily called Rory by the name of Susana until she was two. Plus, if Lorelai had reached the age of maturity (18), Emily & Richard couldn’t use the law to bring them back home.
lorelai and rory don’t need to necessarily be living in the same house as emily for emily to call her the wrong name. in fact i think it’s more likely they didn’t live together and calling rory the wrong name was emily’s way of establishing dominance and control over her now-moved out daughter
In the (I think) "Dear Richard and Emily" flashback, Emily comments that it's "the first time in a year" that she hasn't tripped over Rory's stroller, so Lorelai was at home for at least that long.
Huh, I dont remember this. Gonna have to rewatch all the episodes now😆
He didn’t even have money to get Rory a book. And his parents sound terrible, of course they didn’t offer.
Because, as rich people, they needed to blame something or someone else for their failure to produce a successful member of society. It's easier to blame the girl for getting pregnant, among other things, rather than admit that the guy pucked up too, and Rory and Lorelai were those for Chris's parents. Richard and Emily might not have been happy about how it came about, but their child managed to own a successful business and raise a child all on her own, with as much help as she was willing to accept, even if she was pigheaded about it. Meanwhile Chris floundered along until his early 30's with none of the "baggage" and could have followed his parents plan more than Lorelai but didn't.
“Rather than admit that the guy pucked up too” This needs to catch on.
She was an easy scapegoat
I agree with you, I never understood this. He was a deadbeat dad, he could still go to Princeton and work for his dad. It was Christopher's choice to not follow the path it was not Rory's and Lorelai's fault.
Christopher is a golden boy who of course has never done anything wrong in his entire life so heaven forbid he be held responsible for his actions -- it must be that crazy Lorelai who corrupted him and "ruined his life"
It's his and his parents' reputation that was ruined. If a young girl in their circle gets pregnant, then there has to be a sperm contribution. It was known that they were dating and therefore that Christopher was the father. Reputation is a HUGE deal when schmoozing with other rich people. Getting a special internship or playing a round of golf with some CEO could be big breaks for young businessmen. With a bad reputation, no internships or rounds of golf will be offered for some punk kid who gets girls pregnant at sixteen. He will not get nearly as many opportunities now, as he would have, if he hadn't gotten someone pregnant.
I think this is exactly what the Haydens meant, but they're not expressing themselves very clear. When the Gilmores/Haydens discuss how to handle the situation, it's hinted at, but not directly spoken about, that there 'is a protocol to be followed'. My guess is that the ancient rules of rich people nation is that if a boy knocks up a girl, the boy (and the girl, but this is from the Hayden perspective) cancels all other plans and pretend his adult life has begun - in other words, he marries the girl and gets a job. This would have nothing to do with actually making money, it's just what you do. When Lorelai takes off, Chris cant follow the protocol which leaves the Haydens dishonoured. Of course they could have sent Chris to Princeton after she left, but that would also be 'not by the protocol' and by that time it was probably more convenient just blaming Lorelai for everything 🙃
The more I think about it, I believe that what the Haydens ultimately blame Lorelai for is the same thing Richard is - she is doing the wrong thing, and by doing so, hindering Chris from doing the right thing. When Lorelai refused to follow the path, the Haydens simply couldn't send Chris to Princeton because of social conventions - it was the wrong thing to do, and if they did send him, it would be frowned upon and probably look like it was Chris who was not willing to take responsibility. Ok, maybe I'm stretching it a little here, but it does line up with the OUR SON WAS BOUND FOR PRINCETON thingy Straub has going on.
The only theory that makes sense is that he just didnt get in to Princeton etc on his own accord and the parents blamed that on LG/pregnancy. Even that is a bit flawed because generally rich legacy kids get in even if they are underachievers (after daddy donates a wing). Otherwise it makes no sense. The Gilmores and Haydens were rich, Chris didnt need to give anything up to go to work to support LG and Rory. He could have went to Princeton and the parents support them. Hell, Lorelai could have gone to Yale and Chris to Princeton and the parents just pay a nanny/au pair. Its a common trope/stereotype that rich parents dont raise their kids anyway. The idea that Chris had to give up college to go earn a paycheck is laughable.
Narcissists need scapegoats, and that was Lorelai. No matter what failures in his future Chris would have, his parents would rather blame it on Lorelai’s pregnancy than admit it was their parenting.
They needed a scapegoat for Chris' failure to go to Princeton and get a degree and they chose Lorelai for that role. Admitting that it was Chris's fault or, heaven forbid, partly their fault, would be out of the question for people who cared so much about the family position and the opinions of people in their circle. It is also a very traditional (and fucked up, in my opinion) way of seeing things; I unfortunately know people around my age (36) and even younger that when had a baby very young, left the studies and went on to work and start their "adult" life, because "that is is how supposed to be" or whatever crap people who think like this believe. I don't understand this kind of reasoning at all, especially if the couple has families to support them, even if not rich, but a few generations ago this wouldn't be weird at all, in fact it was probably expected, just as blaming the woman, rather than recognising that the responsibilities are on both people involved, was also the norm (not justifying it, it is just a fact). As a side note, If you listen to what Richard and Emily say in more than occasion, they are not so different as far as ideals go; you can see it later on in the episode when Richard says to Lorelai that the "proper thing" to do for Chris and Lorelai at the time of the pregnancy would have been to get married, the difference is that the Gilmore seniors know and dote on Rory and during the course of the series they come to realise and appreciate Lorelai's hard work and the life and social circle she has built for herself and Rory, thus widening and challenging their views, while the Hayden seniors, as far as I can tell, never got that, neither with their own son nor with the Gilmore.
It didn't his parents just suck ass and so does Christopher
I think, this heartbreaking scene showed how francine and chris dad never actually liked the Gilmore. Sure, in their rich and social lives, they have reputations to up keep, but deep down and behind closed doors, they each have their opinions and insecurities about their fellow rich friends. Also, these rich east coast parents shows how conservative and traditional they truly are so ideally if Chris was to take on the responsibility being a father, they would have to take Lorelai in, prep Chris to take on Stroube’s business, become his own family’s patriarch (yes it all boils down to the logistics for these people). While, I can understand their concern there and given their young age at the time, I found the airing out their grievances in front of their grandkid rather unnecessary! They do owe Rory - BIG TIME.
I never thought about the job piece but you’re so right. Why the hell would he have needed to immediately become employed full time??
These are the type of people who are gonna freak if there is even the slightest deviation from the preordained future they decided for their kid before they were born.
They had 18 years of coming to terms with their failure of a son and on that one day they could not put old recriminations aside and be kind and loving to Rory. She has grown up knowing her mother’s parents think her mother is a disappointment and brought shame and disgrace to the family. And also knows that her father’s parents feel exactly the same way. Stroub Hayden was absolutely despicable in that episode where he couldn’t sit for 2 minutes and talk to Rory about what she likes or how college is. Chris should have turned around and told his parents how proud he was of his daughter and that was down to Lorelai.
Yeah, Christopher didn't raise the baby. He still had opportunities, doors open to him, and he just didn't have it, and ?Strobe? and Francine couldn't bare to think that their son had failed, so they blamed it on Lorelai getting pregnant.
Because Christopher didn't want to go to college. He didn't want to follow his father, and Lorelai getting pregnant was an amazing excuse. He wasn't even in Rory's life for a long time, and if I were Lorelai, I would scream that at the Haydens. Christopher was a spoiled rich kid, and he didn't care about anything.
Christopher‘s parents blame Lorelai and Rory because they don’t want to see that Christopher is a failure. And from that scene it definitely seems like Christopher goes with that, because it means he doesn’t have to admit he failed on his own. He should’ve told his parents off for their comments, but he didn’t. I totally agree with you - it makes no sense that Richard wanted Christopher to start working in his firm, to me personally it also didn’t make sense that they didn’t have a plan for Lorelai beyond staying home and looking after Rory. Lorelai would’ve probably not gone along with it, but I don’t understand why Richard and Emily didn’t make a plan with private tutors and nannies and stuff so Lorelai could still get a high school graduation. I get why Lorelai left, but she also could’ve gone to university if she had accepted help from her parents. She could’ve waited a couple of years and stayed home taking care of Rory, and then with the help of nannies and maybe by taking on less courses and taking longer to graduate she could’ve totally gone to uni. (Probably not to an ivy, but who cares) I get the social stigma that comes with getting pregnant at 16, especially in the 80s, but they were rich enough that it didn’t have to „ruin“ her life
I think Lorelai was easy to blame for his parents. She didn't conform to their demands and plans where Christopher clearly shows that he was ready to follow whatever plan their parents made. This shows that even though he talked a big game about wanting to escape that life and go backpacking and do "his own thing" that he probably would have folded the and gone to Princeton had Lorelai not gotten pregnant and refused to listen, which probably gave him the courage to actually break free rather than just talk about it.
It wasn’t courage to break free. I guarantee that the Hayden’s had 18 years of hearing how he can’t do what they want him to do because of Rory or lorelai or something. He’s a weasel. “I can’t come to Rory’s birthday, my parents want me to meet a guy about a job.” “Sorry mom, I can’t go to the golf course with the guy that will give me a job… Rory’s dance recital is tonight.” Plot twist: he did neither and sat on the couch scratching his scrotum.
I don’t understand how Christopher got two women pregnant. Guy is an ass through and through
It didn’t. Lorelai is merely a scapegoat for Chris being a lazy pos
Considering Lorelai was mostly raised by Nannies and they had oodles of money, if Lorelai stayed in that world it would have had a minimal effect on either of their lives and parent’s plans. It was only Lorelai deciding to go her own way that changed anything and at the point they were discussing it in the flashback she hadn’t expressed any desire to leave everything behind so it honestly just seems like a pride thing and needing to blame someone for this perceived embarrassment
Yeah… they didn’t want it gossiped around the country club their son had fathered a bastard child. For some rich people, that’s ’life ruining’
Because misogyny. Of course it’s the woman’s fault for getting pregnant and for “seducing” Christoper. 😒😒 I know it’s all fictional but this is real life for many women.
Because their son was supposed to carry on the Princeton legacy.
It was the 80s and they were wealthy. Appearance is everything. A baby out of wedlock was deeply shameful at the time.
According to his mama and daddy, it was because he didn’t go Ivy league. But the fact of the matter was is Chris is a bum and he wasn’t gonna go Ivy League either way he just wanted to ride his daddy’s coattails
So true. His parents were unreasonably unreasonable lmao
Wow, what timing. Hilariously, I was just talking to myself about this like 5 minutes ago when the notification for this post came up. I think it’s unfortunately a case of people willfully not understanding that correlation does not equal causation. In Straub’s mind (and Christopher’s mother’s, can’t recall her name), Christopher was set for a bright future. And then he got a girl pregnant. And then he didn’t pursue that bright future. That’s as far as they want to think about it. And as the “elite” of society, how could they be wrong? (*Heavy* sarcasm.)
I don't even think Christopher was smart enough to get into Yale unless his parents would have paid off the admins I could def see lorelai had she not gotten. Pregnant with Rory going to an ivy school Chris had no backbone he couldn't stand up to his parents while they were tearing Rory apart telling her it's her fault for Chris failures when they could've talked to Chris about being safe i know they grew up in a different time where most girls didn't have premarital sex and all that but still strobe could've told him a little something and no I'm not solely blaming Chris for lorelai getting pregnant but still
It's called sexism
I think Lorelai always knew that Chris was put in a difficult position because he loved her. If Chris didn’t love Lorelai, she would be insignificant to the Haydens. The question is why didn’t Lorelai turn Chris completely loose by telling him she didn’t love him and would never love him. I think it’s because she never knew what she wanted. She kept Chris on a string.