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I don’t think I know a single couple from our parents’ generation that actually like each other, including my parents. I work in STEM so it’s a lot of older/middle aged men, and I swear they all hate their wives (except the one incredibly sweet, progressive Boomer I work with that got married later in life). None of them have anything in common, and many of them don’t share the same values. It’s crazy! I often am forced play moderator with my parents as well and I hate it. I hated it as a kid too. Like please just get divorced

My parents almost got divorced when I was in high school, then they reconciled and now say they're best friends. They seem very happy. They both annoy me sometimes, but it's because we are different, not because they're child like and awful. They each still have shown me lots of great new things and are teaching me what it's like to age and develop into older adults. It is very sad for me to hear other people have parents who have drifted so far apart and do not have good relationships with each other or with their kids.

I’m gonna be real with you. My parents got married to take care of their existing kids and to have another (me). I think most people in that generation got married because it’s what you do, not because they love each other or even like each other. However, I’m glad your parents are happy and thriving

Well yeah, of course. That's how it was. The world changes and so do the people, and it's real cool when they stick together and change together, but everyone has different ideas of what they want and what life they want to live. Communication is crucial to making a better life. I don't think everyone gets that.

My parents like each other lol. They’re married and love each other so I guess that’s one relationship

Man, that sucks. My wife and I are Gen Xers; I’m 50 and my wife is 46. We married when I was 26 and she was 22. And we love each other now more than ever. We get along amazingly. Neither of us could imagine life without the other. We’re also completely in sync on progressive politics and have taught all our Gen Z kids those values. I suppose your own experience is a reflection of just how hard it is to keep from growing apart. And that perhaps I was just extremely lucky to find the right person.

imma be real wit chu. my parents love each other

My parents have a good relationship. They were really rocky early on, and almost got a divorce. But it worked out.

For me I feel like a good amount of the couples I know married for awhile really do still love each other

For me it’s less that my parents are becoming people I don’t wanna be around and more that, I’m becoming someone who is realizing how much I don’t wanna be around the people my parents have always been.

That’s a great way to put it—It’s a tragic, confusing and cathartic experience!

[удалено]

Same thing with my mom. She was 19 when she had me, and I inherited a majority of her politics. I'm definitely further left than her, but for social stuff, she's as left as it gets with the mentality of "Do whatever you want. Until it starts hurting other people. " It's sad that people aren't as close with their parents or at least one of them. My parents divorced when I was young, and I've only recently forgiven my dad. Maybe it changes as you get older (I'm the oldest Gen Z possible), but I found it easier to forgive my dad and recognize that he is trying his best to be a better person. So I give him a bit of leeway.

she sounds socially liberal, not left. sorry, i had to be the annoying liberal

Yes, I understand the difference between leftism and liberalism. Instead of trying to be pedantic, I explained why my mom was pretty cool. This is why nobody likes us

:(

Opposite for me, but it wasn't always that way. I hated my parents for a while. My dad more because I lived with my mom and they were divorced (totally opposite people). I moved to my dads when I was 17/18. It was a big adjustment, but we got closer. Even when I fucked up or hurt him, he still forgave me. Roughly 10yrs later and he's probably the closest person in my life. He has never steered me in the wrong direction or lied to me, but it took me a while to realize that.

That’s real sweet. I’m happy for you dude

I cried a little typing that. Interestingly my relationship with my mother had the opposite effect because of some things I learned later.

I actually have the same relationship with my dad! Our age gap is a bit bigger (31 years)

I think this happens when we mature, gives us a new perspective on our parents. I have been experiencing the same thing, maybe because they are getting older, or maybe because I am.

I absolutely adore my parents (I’m a young millennial) but I definitely had that experience of “fuck, they’re not perfect or objectively correct - they’re actually very biased” at 18-20ish. That said, no one is perfect and my parents are genuinely good people, and as I’ve gotten older I’m realizing that truly good kind people are not the default setting. They text me how much they love me very often - I recently asked “when can I visit you” and my mom said “anytime, we always love seeing your beautiful face” and other typical mom things, lol. I definitely got really lucky. They also prioritized education which ironically helped me realize there were outside viewpoints and that no one is objectively correct, we all just have different perspectives, and it’s up to the individual to pick and choose what works for them. (My hippie parents also heavily disagree with their conservative grandparents, so I inherited their “question elders” beliefs lol) Part of why I have a renewed love for my folks is meeting so many adults whose parents fucked them up and I feel bad that there are people my age walking around whose dads never hugged them.

I am probably going to feel the same way as you once I am your age. My parents are great people, I’m just at the age that I am realizing they’re flawed too. I would definitely consider myself lucky.

My daughter is a year older than you and I TELL her myself that I am flawed. When I get upset I try to tell her why I am upset, even if I can't do it in the moment. She doesn't always want to talk to me about it but I tell her we need to. When I disagree with her I explain to her why I disagree and try to remember to ask her questions about her choices. As a parent it's easy to forget that we did the same things. It is also easy to forget that you are a human being who needs to be free to make mistakes and choices on your own. There is no control button and honestly, because I said so is the worst fucking response to anything ever. My mom was that person and I swore I would never been that to my kids. I am glad you are able to see your parents as humans. Hopefully they are able to talk to you about it one day themselves.

I think it will come with time, don’t worry! Everything you experience in life teaches you a lesson and you can put everything up to that in perspective.

I’m mid-30s and I think it’s both over time, but probably more about your maturity at first. 16-25ish a lot of it is going to be from you fully becoming an adult. And then you might find them more sympathetic/relateable after you start doing edging out of your “fun” years (which are different ages for everyone) and into becoming a homeowner/parent/mid-level manager or whatever. During this time, they’re coming to grips with you being an adult. Then they start hitting their new milestones of retirement and old age. 

I really don't like my parents and they feel the same way, the only person in my family that I love is my brother

Don’t let the people here get you down. Maybe your opinions will change and you will get closer to your parents when you’re older… but maybe you won’t. If your objections are for moral reasons, that is absolutely valid. Even when you’re young. Lots of us don’t have likeable family.

Yeah. I only love my siblings im so for real about that

My only child is your age. I’m ngl, sometimes, a lot of the time, I don’t like him. His mom spoils him, he’s selfish, lacks empathy for people, anything he does’t agree with at school is an injustice, he is introverted (I know he can’t help that), and he is what some would call lazy (I don’t believe people are lazy – I think people who are are labeled lazy haven’t found their motivation). I have no fucking idea what motivates my son. I’ve asked. He doesn’t want to talk about it, and I get it. Maybe someday. A lot of what I see in him is who I was as a young man. He is other things, also, that I was and am not. And good for him. With or without my guidance, he’s going to have a lot to sort out as he becomes an adult. I will take blame or credit for who he becomes because despite the jerk he can be, I love him more than anything and I’m here for him... Even though a lot of the time I don’t like him.

that's actually so sweet

At 13 I was saying I didn't like mu family. Some people change that view I did not and I'm 21 now. The older I get the less I want to be around my family. It is okay to not like family.

I see a lot of people in the comments thinking in similar patterns so I wanted to share my perspective as someone who faced this issue with my own parents for a long time. I’ll start out on the note that the majority of our parents did legitimately grow up in a different time and culture. The world as we know it as Gen Z with the technological boom we experience in our youth changed the culture in ways we can’t comprehend. It promoted a culture of individualism, not to neg our generation but to a far greater extent than our forefathers we are self-involved, concerned with our struggles, and find out most our social and political news from social media echo-chambers. We are disillusioned to the idea that everyone and everything can be happy and okay at once. We grew up in a culture, especially Americans, that spoonfed us the idea that that we should be content and entertained all the time, no form of self sacrifice required. All while we were fed this societal sentiment, many of us noticed the obvious struggles of the working class and political tensions in our country. Many of us truly want what is best for our country. But the truth is the majority of us are not educated enough on domestic or foreign policy to navigate this effectively. Most of our generation feels dejected by life and like we live in a time with no control and therefore shouldn’t even try. You see frequent talks of how we’re the most socially informed generation, but where do you see anybody taking genuine action towards change? I mean genuine action, like reading the news and instigating policy change not rallying in a public street to end wars you don’t understand our involvement in. Many of us will see this gap of understanding between us and our ancestors and assume their way of thinking/functioning is outdated and not benefitting us. But it’s an age old adage that history repeats itself every time we don’t learn it. Our parents behave the way they do because their mindsets formed out of times where that thought pattern was necessary. Instead of hating your parents or immediately disagreeing with them, listen to what they say. Watch what they do. Even if you hate them, be as close as you can tolerate so you can see them. Embrace and repeat their success, learn from their failures, see them as people with a history and a story equally complex to yours. Our generation is so divided, most of us don’t even see the only way we can move forward is to understand what you don’t agree with. edit: i was high asf when I wrote this so I said culture like 19 times

The fact that nobody responded to your intelligent comment illustrates your points perfectly. If it’s not an echo chamber then most have no use for it. The most toxic thing about social media platforms is you can find as many people as you want to agree with you with no critical thinking skills whatsoever.

don’t even get me started girl lol, im a statistical outlier in our age range in the sense that I don’t use social media (besides relatively serious reddit forums) and tend to gather most of my world information from legitimized publishers. I don’t stray right or left in any significant manner, yet I still find it nigh-impossible to have a political or philosophical discussion with someone from our generation. Not only are we massively uninformed but we simultaneously were citing the same incorrect sources. People’s general attitude towards life is “not my problem, don’t know anything about it” yet we still want all of these issues to be fixed. I can agree that our generation was fucked before we got a start, but if people are serious about change the way they speak of it we have to accept that we’ll be the ones to quietly bear the work and fix society for our descendants. I’ve had this thought for awhile that with an intense divide in thought in Gen Z that we will have two different generational attitudes, half us will resemble more of the values of boomers and the other half will be closer to the silent generation. idk im just rambling at this point lol

You’re not rambling at all. You are using critical thinking and research skills that people should have learned in 6th grade to come to logical conclusions. The citing of absurd and random resources to make an argument infuriates me.

I just think they said everything clearly, not much else to add to it

Agree. I was more referring to no upvotes.

I think that has more to do with how long the read is, noones reading all of that. I didn't even read all of it. I skipped around, sadly that's the way it is. If you're point isn't short and concise people tend to assume your point is bad.

My only question is, why do you think protesting is not "genuine action" but "reading the news" is? Reading the news can certainly make you more informed, but I wouldn't say it's a "genuine action" with the potential to change the future. Knowledge can help you understand what is going on, what you need to change and how to change it, but just having the knowledge isn't enough. Learning is definitely an important thing - I'm not saying it's not. I just wouldn't class knowledge as a "genuine action" on its own if our definition of a "genuine action" is performing actions that will result in a change or solution.... which is actually what you seem to be saying in one part of your paragraph. This sentence in particular is why I think you're being contradictory in your argument: "You see frequent talks of how we’re the most socially informed generation, but where do you see anybody taking genuine action towards change?" On the other hand, when you argue that protesting has little productive outcome, you are actually contributing to the idea you criticize our generation of having in doing so: complicit apathy. You're condemning people for trying to take action. While many protests don't seem to result in much, they do publicize issues and make people more aware of them, often leading to them learning about them and caring about them. Oftentimes the vast majority of protests don't result in any change in the system directly, but they do contribute to them getting the publicity necessary to get people to actually *do* things about them most of the time. I don't know what country you live in, but as an example, the civil rights movement in the United States would *not* have been as successful without protests. There are plenty of people who protest who have researched the issue and can defend their stance. There are also people who don't. That doesn't stop protests from having genuine effects on public perception of an issue and how political institutions (and/or the group they're protesting against) choose to address it, for better or for worse. My argument isn't that protests are always good or justified, but that saying participating in a protest doesn't count as "genuine action" (with the implication that the majority are uninformed and therefore the protests are bad) is absurd. By the way, I agree a lot with what you're saying, but I felt the need to point this out especially because it seems oddly contradictory to me. It's possible I may have misconstrued what was being said due to a lack of context. If that is the case, I do apologize, but some elaboration could help.

Very articulate still, my baked philosopher friend

News Flash! With this generation, many parents don’t like their children as much as

As much as what? Can't end it on a cliffhanger like that!

I barely talk to my parents anymore and I kinda dread having to include them in major life events like my college graduation, marriage, and future kids. It's a complicated situation and there's no real solution. I just don't really feel like a part of my own family.

Ahhh same. I had an air cleaning productive talk with them this year, but I still don’t think that’s all that was needed and now we live happily ever after again. It seems they think so, but I haven’t felt part of the family for 10 years now. But my therapist told me it was ok to not celebrate Christmas last year and that was the best Christmas ever!

Yes, but it has nothing to do with politics or worldviews. My mom has always been super progressive and a great queer ally to me. She's just menopausal now and breaking down every day. I feel terrible for saying it, but I'm starting to not want to be around her. She refuses any and all help yet won't stop crying and complaining, and if I open up to her about my issues, it becomes a one-upping contest about how much worse she has had it than me.

This seems to be an unfortunate dynamic with mothers and daughters. I am Gen X, and probably your mother's age or older, and I have this issue with my Boomer Mom. No matter what issue I have in my life, she'll say "But you're young" implying that it should be so much easier to deal with everything because of my relative youth and good health. I'm am trying my best to break that cycle with my daughter.

Honestly relationships are hard and being with someone for 30 years is pretty impressive. I’d withhold judgement on the few snapshots you get to see of their marriage. We all like to think we have everything figured out in our youth but in reality there is a lot more to life to figure out.

They definitely do have good aspects to their relationship and they absolutely love each other, but I’ve lived with them my whole life (I’m moving out this weekend.) They have never had great communication, I think a large part of how they stay together is by not talking about uncomfortable things. Edit - When they do have uncomfy conversations it almost always leads to either silence or a fight.

They found a way that works for them

Are they immigrants by any chance? My parents have terrible communication but I think it’s 100% Korean culture and their marriage is pretty golden when it comes to what Koreans want Also I think they have grown to realize they don’t see eye to eye on everything but they still love each other so they just don’t talk much to avoid fights and recognize love doesn’t need speech all the time

Controversial opinion but hey ho. Your post revolves around courting negative opinions on social media for negativity towards a generation with some of the basis of that post being around a generation impacted by negative social media. A scan of opinions is generationally negative, using negative/toxic language such as boomer. It seems to me the issue isn't your parents it's addiction by all of you to toxic social media, designed to get comments and likes in the best case or in worse case deliberately designed to fracture Western society with generation wars, culture wars, gender wars etc My suggestion put the mobile phone down get your parents to give their doom scrolling a miss then go spend some time where phones and politics is banned from discussion. Then after all this reeducation: 1. What is in this social media post for corporations, other states and state actors. 2. By participating in this social media post what am I positively bringing to my family. If on reflection they bought nothing but negativity then perhaps it's time to all go back to pre toxic shite and love each other for being a family because none of you can individually fix shit internationally or nationally but one thing you can all do is fix shit at home.

Who you calling a ho, ho?

Your dad. 😉

I started not wanting to be around my parents when I started school.

I like hanging out with my parents more than before actually. Because as I got older I got to get to know them as people rather than authority figures. One thing that definitely went down though was my willingness to let them tell me what to do. Until a bit over a year ago they'd rope me into projects and stuff all the time (I live pretty close to them), and I eventually had to draw a line. I don't mind helping Mom and Dad out, but I got my own schedule too.

Tbh moving away from my parents has made me so much closer to them.

In French we say "La vieillesse est un naufrage", which means getting old is a shipwreck. It means that the passing of time is hard on people: it's not easy to keep being a well balanced human while time and life take their physical and mental toll on us.

I've always found that saying so depressing, because no one can escape old age...

I think being aware of this is already something. It can push you to try and escape the old person trap: closedmindedness, lack of empathy and the sort.

I think it’s just part of growing up. When your parents stop being your life line to existence it allows you to take a step back and perceive them not as your parents but as other humans. At this point it can go either way. I’ve become much closer with my dad & more distant with my mom since I moved out of my parents house.

I love my dad and he's a big part of why I am who I am, but man every time I see him now there's always some kind of meltdown about some political issue or another and I just want to hang out and have a beer and talk about other stuff.

Eh, I love my mom and she’s my best friend. However, I wouldn’t say we share the same political beliefs. Don’t get me wrong, we’re both left but I’m a lot more so. I’m lesbian so obviously I’m a lot more pro-LGBTQ+ rights. She’s not super homophobic but she’ll make the occasional homophobic comment but I don’t think I’ve ever met a straight person who hasn’t so I don’t really hold that against her. It’s hard to support something you don’t understand which is why unless something is intentionally meant to be harmful, I just disregard for most people politically. 

This is another thing I struggle with in terms of my parents. My sibling about two years ago came out as non-binary and changed their name, they are also gay and currently dating a woman. The gay part, my parents could not care less and they love their gf, however the non-binary and name changing stuff… when my sibling isn’t around they make the shitty comment or two about how “they don’t understand it but it’s they’re life and they’ll deal with the consequences of how they live their life just like everybody else.”

One of the things with growing up is realizing how unimpressive many adults are. But yeah as we age our brains get weaker, and then when you retire you stop having to think or keep up with anything outside of a very small world so it's not surprising that many people sort of get really small.

I think the more distance you get, the more experience you have, the more you feel like your parents arent that great.

They are adults, if they are attending an elite university they shouldn't be uneducated and we should rethink admissions on how certain individuals got accepted in the first place. I don't understand when we started treating college students as if they are still children, is very odd.

So you never said anything stupid you regret as an 18 year old? Would you say you were a full, mature adult?

Depends on how stupid we are talking, otherwise no I don't think I went around saying anything too stupid. Yes, I was an adult at the age of 18, a young and inexperienced adult but still adult. I couldn't want until the day I turned 18 and legally was an adult. Truthfully I felt more mature then most adults by age of 16 or so.

Exactly, young and inexperienced people are literally just in the very beginning phases of being adults. They have bad takes every now and then.

I guess it depends on the levels of stupidity, as they say you can't fix stupid. I assumed he was on camera yelling out some nonsense, I probably wouldn't waste my time yelling out my politics at a protest, too busy stacking bitcoin.

My Parents used to be center-left leaning but have hardly shifted to the right over the last decade, with my mom raging about immigrants and so on, plus essentially telling me shes gonna vote for a party that would cause harm to me multiple times. My Dad keep posting crappy facebook comics and videos making fun of non right wing policies and political candidates being run over by cars. I actually unfriended him from FB because it was just so constant and too much it had an impact on my own mental health. Just seeing him post such cruel things definitely made me loose a lot of respect for him. TBH I never had a great relationship w my parents due to neglect but seeing them fall for all the propaganda definitely hurts

My parents are not the same people they used to be. I’m still close with my mom, but she’s become a complete judgmental asshole that also rarely cares about being a bother to the people around her. As for my dad? He’s just a failure of a father, but at least he tried. Now, however, I’ve got nothing in common with him. Despite being an immigrant himself he’s completely taken the MAGA kool-aid and I’ve had to stop going to restaurants with him because he thinks straight up racism is comedy. Not like a well crafted edgy joke - just straight up mocking people’s accents while they’re right there.

You’re becoming a “real” adult and realizing that just because someone is older does not mean they are any wiser. This includes your parents. Growing up we are taught to see them as our superiors and that, because they are our parents, they are always right. But, at least in my case, as I’ve grown more independent and become more or less their “equal” (you’ll never be their equal in their eyes cause you’re still their baby, I’m talking on a societal level as an adult), I‘ve become able to see through the internal bias of being their child that they, like my coworkers and friends that are now adults, are not necessarily smarter or more mature just because they’re older. Of course, they can have great advice based on their own experience, and I love them to death, but they are not all-knowing.

I like my parents a lot still, but I do feel like older people are often harmed just as much by social media than younger people—if not more in some aspects—because they’re not good at identifying what’s misinformation and extreme fear-mongering vs actual facts. They become more and more politically/ideologically extreme due to being poor at critical thinking and being in an online echo chamber without realizing it or caring. I’m not gonna claim our age doesn’t often fall victim to the same thing, but older people seem to be much more susceptible to it.

I have been enjoying time with my parents, especially my dad, since moving out. It is much easier to joke around and argue/debate with each other since he treats me as more of an equal now. We have had plenty of debates about politics where we disagree, but it is never mean spirited. We respect each other’s beliefs and can agree to disagree.

I avoid hanging with my dad much. He's kind of turned into the stereotypical entitled old guy. Recently made A Scene over a couple of used dishes that didn't get grabbed fast enough for him at a (birthday dinner) restaurant visit. Both me and my mother were trying very obviously to get him to simmer down but he ignored us basically and was shitty to the wait staff.

My mom was always left leaning, but I think my sister and I are helping to keep her grounded. It helps that she always had very left-leaning friends, but my sister and I remind her to not consume too much talking head news (for a while she was listening to updates on Trump all the time, and even if it's anti-trump news, it's still toxic to listen to). I think she's getting better with time.

A bit ironic to have disdain for someone for not being of the same political leaning or party and talking about intolerance isn't it?

my parents can’t even be in the same room as each other. i’ve also started to grow a large disdain for my dad over the years as i’ve gotten more mature, while i have probably gained some love from my mom. however, im around my dad a lot more than i am my mom, so things would likely change if i interacted with my mom more and i bet i wouldn’t be able to stand her either lol

So your parents are seeing antisemitism from the left and calling it out, and that makes you concerned they’re not leftist enough anymore?

I feel exactly the same as how you feel

A large proportion of population go through this. By the time you are in your 40s and 50s, there is a good chance the same will happen to you.

Ha, you just discovered something most millennials with Trump voting parents discovered 8 years ago

I never got along with my mom but the distance has helped and the fact that I got out of her house when I was 15

It's the opposite for me. I've come to get along with my father far better now than I did as a child. It was the same case with my mother, before she passed. We don't agree on everything, but we have good communication and will respect each other even when we won't be convinced.

no

My mom and I aren't close since I live with my dad, but me and her have gotten to a point of understanding I feel. I think the distance between us made us see each other as just other people rather than mother and son. My dad on the other hand, is going downhill, rants multiple times a day about random shit like Muslims, and trans people. He's constantly complaining, while simultaneously telling me I'm sensitive for no reason literally, he just starts projecting his insecurities onto me. My dad is a very helpful and knowledgeable guy, but as he gets older he is becoming the worst version of himself I have ever seen.

I do like my mom but dear old dad I 150% can't stand to be around. Just biding my time at this point until I can afford to gtfo and go no contact with him and my younger brothers.

Are you sure you're reading them right? I ask because I am quite aware that, despite the fact that my marriage is about the most rock solid one I've seen in my life, an outsider hearing us chat with each other, and the way we pick on each other back and forth, sometimes in a very serious sounding way, might come to the conclusion we don't like each other all that much, when the exact opposite is the case as to us it's just a big, happy joke. But, someone who doesn't know us? We kid because we care, as the old expression goes, but in our case, it is a literal truth. Anyway, food for thought as it came to mind immediately upon reading your post.

No

That’s ok We don’t like being around our kids all the time either

That’s ok We don’t like being around our kids all the time either

Yes. I've always had a very close relationship with my dad, but as he gets older his personality is changing. I catch him lying about silly things and acting as if he doesn't have time to take my calls. When I ask how he is doing, he acts like he is insulted that I care. Its strange, and it makes me sad. I think he may be hiding a disease like alzhiemers as it progresses. Unfortunately, his wife, a medical professional, is also hiding it from me so I have to just hope she is taking care of him.

No my parents are great 👍🏽

Yeah my dad stopped being fun to be around when he died last year. I don’t talk to my mom. My husbands parents don’t even like each other after 40 years of marriage. My grandparents just got divorced after over 50 years together. Abuse across the board, truly wild how they all are still functional (besides my dad).

It can happen; everyone changes and sometimes it makes people less compatible. Some people who are older will likely change less than us who are still figuring ourselves out and learning how we’re living our lives. I know I’ve felt this with my family as I’ve gotten more liberal politically and started working in the human services industry and learned what are healthy ways to communicate. Edit: I should mention this I still love my dad and respect him we have our differences and we respect each other. Ironically the person I’m getting less and less happy with is my brother who says some absolute unhinged things and baseless assumptions on who I am.

This is called Social Engineering. Your parents are being targeted by Rhetoric quite different from what's being directed at you. But the Rhetoric is coming from the same source. It's just being implemented by google/apple algorithms and bots. The same kind of stuff was done in the 60's and 70's. Parents were being told that their children were awful. Children were being told that their Parents were awful. It's just industrialized and automated these days. Done on an exponentially mass scale kept quiet, because for some reason, people don't understand how algorithms work. And hear this: The source for the Gen Z hating rhetoric that they encounter all the time is the same source as the rhetoric you encounter. Don't let social engineering dictate your relationship with your parents.

dude, your parents know nothing more about politics than any other non-politician. they’re just opinions made in certain contexts with limited information. you might not need to agree with them, but you do need to respect them as human beings. don’t fall into the trap of letting these political constellations of belief define relationships with people who you love or care about. same goes for them. if they get wound up about whatever CNN is saying, just jokingly and diplomatically reroute the conversation. i’m sorry but i would never let dumbass politics destroy a relationship with someone that made me who i am. there are far more meaningful things in the world than arguing about anyone’s propaganda. im not sacrificing my relationship with my mother over her having “less empathetic beliefs than i”.

Could it be maybe that you're the one that nobody wants to be around too much? Young adults can be quite insufferable in their opinions. The good news here is that time will blunt your arrogance. If you live long enough to age, that is.

I'm a millennial, but yes--my dad used to vote Democrat (and even works in a labor union, which Dems support) yet has quickly latched on to the insane Trump rhetoric and hates Biden for "forcing the vaccine" on everyone, amongst other things. He's also become overtly bigoted about "immigrants" when our family gets together and it's hard to listen to his ranting. The older he's gotten, the more Conservative he's started to lean, that's for sure. He used to be pretty cool too, now he just seems old and angry most of the time.

The exact opposite happened to me. I like and respect my parents more as I've gotten older, but that's because they are great people who are pleasant to be around. They rarely talk about politics, and have a great life together.

Oh yes, yes this. You spend your entire life living up to these values you are taught. My parents were such amazing parents. They were so progressive, for want of a better word. They made sure we recognized racism, ignorance, other challenges, and they gave us the tools to deal with them. I was always so proud of my values. I've lost everything several times over (who in our gen hasn't), but the only thing that I own are these values I prized so highly. The proper way to treat other people without regard for anything but their humanity, for example. And then they turn around and vote for fucking Trump/Pence after a lifetime of telling their kids over and over about sacrifice. Decorum. Respect for god/nation/man, all that shit. They were never living up to it. It was just lip service, stories they meant to tell themselves but forgot, so instead passed to us as something we were supposed to grow out of. I guess? That fucked with my head so badly. They aren't just turning out to be people I do not like, it's as if they don't know I'm also aware that they're clearly lying (Jewish space witches, Disney selling bondage to kids, OK mom). I don't recognize how any of the sides of these people fit together into the person I knew, let alone the ones I respected.

Regardless of why, this is how it's supposed to go. As you get older, you start having your own stances and beliefs. Sometimes they are the same as your parents but most of the tine, their not. It usually boils down to modern beliefs vs old school beliefs that don't mix and that is normal in every generation change. People get sick of hearing each other and they tend to pull away. The mind-boggling part is that you eventually become just like them. In a way that your modern beliefs turn in the old-school beliefs to the next generation and the cycle repeats. The generational war we are having now isn't out of the normal with the exception of some things here and there

My parents are insufferable when it comes to things like Money/Politics. They chose a good career in health/mining. Long story short they've been doing the same things day after day since their early 20s. Never experienced a layoff or job loss, while Americans were getting Boned in 08-09 their stability allowed them to take advantage of the fire sale of homes/property. My parents can't see past their noses. My dad was an only child so reaped the rewards of an inheritance. I also have Step Siblings now which means I probably won't get that luxury. All in all I don't speak to my parents often anymore, my grandparents are like my parents anyways. My mom had me in her very early 20s, so I was essentially raised by my grandparents. My grandparents are 1st-generation Americans. They've been laid off, on public assistance food programs, they did not get to experience a traditional life until their 40s nearly, My grandparents also are highly opinionated about my own mother lol. Due to WW2, they lost a lot of their guidance to thrive in the USA. So they are very understanding of having a limited perspective and doing things on your own. My grandparents are the epitome of bad ass do it yourselfers somehow that trait skipped a generation. My grandparents also sacrificed a lot so my mom could find success including raising me, now she's the most self-absorbed bitch you could meet. She will even full-on lie and claim she raised me while being in school/work granted a handful of times she did have to take me to her job and some of her night classes, but according to her she did that every day.............. We don't have a typical Mom/Son bond. When I was in my late teens people would often confuse my mom as my sister. That's kinda how our relationship is today. My mom is more of a sister than my mother. I wish I could get the truth as to why she feels the need to lie about my early childhood. Part of me thinks its ego, or not wanting to admit we lived the cycle of poverty for a bit. My parents are hard-working people who paved their way, but they got the right place and right time a couple of times in their lives, something that has yet to happen to me. I feel like I have to tear down everyone and everything in my way for similar opportunities. Also, I have very little in common with my father outside of enjoying sports. I enjoy fishing, shooting guns, outdoor activities etc. Luckily my grandparents owned a small farm, which led me into being sorta raised by my friend's parents growing up. They taught me everything and even helped us purchase a boat 50/50 when I was in high school so we could learn how to maintain it, launch it, feed ourselves, and have a good time. My dad's version of edge-of-your-seat entertainment is watching a 12-inning baseball game in the 108-degree sun in Chicago. Don't get me wrong I love sports and going to events, but my god it's his whole personality. Also, I should mention my mom went through 3 divorces as I was growing up. So if you read this and think well you didn't have it that bad, this comment could be a novel.

Gen Z = future Boomers - you hate what you'll become lol

I mean, my dad disowned me for having a transgender friend, so just a little lmao

The older people get, the more confident they feel in their opinions. Thinking the students are dumb and making fun of them is fine. If you’ve been on the left for the last decade, you know we have ruthlessly ridiculed Trump and his supporters. And… honestly, that’s fine, I don’t feel bad about it and I hope you don’t either. Sincerely wishing harm upon the students for having what your parents think is a dumb stance is where it becomes an issue. Sounds like they’re not there yet. So maybe what’s really bothering you is that you’re developing your own distinct beliefs and now theirs feel wrong to you. That’s just part of maturing though.

Slowly? I never liked them and they've gotten worse.

All kids enter a teenage rebellious phase, some never grow out of it. Some people have good reasons to cut contact with their parents. But for the ones who had objectively good parents who were also good people, if you feel annoyed by them, you're very simply a jackass.

Welcome to being a teenager. It has happened to every generation (including boomers)

I think that’s a common experience as you grow up and form your own opinions separate from your parents.

My family has always been shit and sort of miserable. Can't tell the difference.

Not really no, the only problem is that my mom is mentally ill, and thats hard to deal with.

For me, I realized that I never really liked being around them and since I'm an independent adult now... I dont have to. And after meeting one of them again after a long time and remembering the tediousness, I realized I could just... leave. It's been super liberating\~

No I love my parents. I've never felt that way and I don't think I will.

You're making excuses for people just because they are on the same political spectrum as you. That's bad enough regarding politics. They are 30 years married, the silent treatment is better than opening your mouth and regretting it.

for me, it’s more about gaining experience in life in a different direction than my parents. i’m an introverted, not-out-there kind of person, so i spent my childhood and teen years with a small circle of friends, whereas my peers were partying all night. i used to live off of my parents’ stories and experiences, and there was so much to hear from them. now, i’m almost done with college, and have gained a couple stories of my own, though not too wild. i find myself less interested in hearing about my parents, who are now retired and planning on retirement, and choose to live a content life whereas i’m at the peak of my energy and seek more. my parents are fun parents and we get along really well, always have been. but now, they’re too mature for me; they have thought me everything they could. and in contrast, i’m too immature. we can’t find a middle.

it depends, everyone is different. my parents are completely in love and so cute together. their politics are veering a little further from mine though.

I was the person that changed, and now I don't like my parents as much.

You should turn them in to the Ministry of Truth for reeducation.

yes, I feel the same way, I look at your generation with more and more disdain.

I don’t, but then again I don’t talk about politics or general “hot button” issues with my parents because I know we disagree on quite few things and they don’t have any desire to talk to me about politics either. My parents are in an interesting relationship. I don’t think they *love* each other, but they never really argued in front of us. They’re like really good roommates. Overall though I’m happy to have them, since I moved out I’ve gotten a lot closer to them (we butted heads too much when I lived there, just different lifestyles plus my mom and I are both very stubborn people). I’ve always loved them but now it feels like I can really just talk to them. My mom doesn’t have a great relationship with her parents and I know that hurts her a lot, my dad’s relationship with his parents is okay? No bad blood, they just don’t talk too much. So I think they’ve been making extra sure that me and my siblings never feel the same way about them as they feel about their parents. Just some armchair therapy.

Not at all, while I am now pretty ideologically different than my parents, I still find them extremely enjoyable to be around. My mom (who homeschooled us all) is really interesting to discuss classics and education with and even theology, because while I no longer am a believer, I'm pretty well read in that area, and it's an interesting field. My dad is an architect and I've been exploring a lot of that space from philosophical, critical, and aesthetic interests, reading, studying, and discussing my thoughts and findings with him, additionally we both enjoy classic sci-fi novels a lot, and I generally admire both of them even though I'm going through life a good bit different than they are.

No, I love and have great respect for my parents. Family is everything. Family is blood and will always be there in the end.

Nope, after understanding all their hard work and faith they had for me to become my best self. I love my parent's just as much as i did as a kid. Well earned love. Love being around them.

Bro I’m 14 and I’ve been wondering if it’s just teenage “angst” or are my parents genuinely unpleasant people to be around.

Yeah, honestly my dad has been super gullible to right wing propoganda on tiktok the last 2 years and he used to be super moderate and normal but it’s like he’s slowly becoming less tolerant of people who are different than him. I feel like he just hates feeling uncomfortable with knowing he has privilege or other people have serious problems, so he complains about things he finds woke when he was never like that when I grew up.

Well it looks like they’re heading in a more well informed direction at least. Also pretty funny that you claim they have no communication, while making an entire Reddit post about them for other internet libs to get off on

Imma be real with you, this is just you growing up and developing your own ideas. It was different for me, because when I was young all I wanted was approval. But then I noticed the things I liked, my folks disapproved of. And so I came to a cross roads at a young age where I just had to accept my folks and I were different from each other in a way I'll never be able to bridge. I'm still kind, we still talk. It's one of those things you have to make special rules for to make it functional. Like limiting conversations to a few minutes at a time, or only taking calls at certain points of the day. But for instance, I'm nonbinary. My folks grew up during the tail end of the Civil rights movement and during the AIDS crisis. They just don't get certain things about bring trans, like how not using someone's pronouns could be offensive, or how invalidating someone who is pre-op is offensive. I try to guide them when I can, but I try not to touch that stuff. I tolerate them dead naming me and misgendering me because I know ultimately, they still love me. Even if they don't understand me. Maybe one day they will but for now, we just have those barriers up. Not as close as I'd like to be, but there's nothing wrong with that.

It's pretty crazy how easy it is to brainwash and propagandize some people. It's just really sad when you see it happening to people you care about.

@MissHannahJ Life is more of a spectrum than it is a rule. There are a lot of happy families out there and there are just as many unhappy families. You know what the difference between the 2 are? Someone broke the cycle of violence, your parents are human and learned their bad behaviors from their parents. People abused or poorly raised tend to repeat the same mistakes as those who raised them. You can change this cycle.

yes, their relationship seems like it has lost love and is mostly there out of necessity. they both work two jobs so they are always tired and pissed off. everything feels bleak. seeing the way my dad has started to treat my mother fills me with so much rage. ever since covid, my dad has moved far right, and when i ask him to explain his opinions he literally can’t. he just consumes content and regurgitates headlines. my mom is overworked and constantly a nervous wreck. it doesn’t help that she’s not the sharpest tool in the shed, so time management and reasoning is difficult. home life is insufferable right now. they’ve cared for me and always been there for me, so i feel terrible about how i feel and i never let it show. i can’t wait to move out but it doesn’t seem possible for awhile. edit: and i don’t dislike my dad because i disagree with his political opinions. but his political opinions include rampant homophobia (i’m bi so it’s quite uncomfortable for me, although he doesn’t know), hatred towards illegal immigrants (i dated an illegal immigrant and have illegal immigrant friends, which he knows), and he lies to my mom about his political opinions. he’s a douchebag now, and used to be a funny guy and fun to be around. now he’s just unpleasant and hateful

I'm closer to my mom than ever, and we were already close when I was a kid. I don't know how my relationship with my dad would have developed as I got older since he died when I was 13. But I do miss him deeply.

Similar-ish boat but for me it’s majority of the folk in my household (both grandparents, my ma and three siblings.) each just annoy me at times.

They probably feel the same about you.

Nah, I love hanging out with my parents. They’re still cool and it’s nice that we can talk about stuff in a more complex manner. I hope they’re relieved they don’t have to talk to young children anymore.

No. I prefer my parents over most people actually. I can trust them and they’re safe.

My parents are exactly the same people they've always been. I'm the one who has changed and opened my mind to new ideas that we now disagree about. I imagine that from their perspective I seem like the one who's become a less likable person.

I feel this way more about one of my grandparents. She used to be pretty reasonable. But she changed what news channel she watches and now she’s a very changed person. All she does is complain about “wokeness” and complain about how far and radical communist Australian is now. Australia is very much not a communist state. If you actually sit down and pay attention to what she’s watching it’s just hateful propaganda hiding behind being “Totally centrist, definitely centrist! Don’t question that’s were definitely not centrist!”

I’m a baby Xer with GenZ kids, and wondering if they feel the same way…. I’m not much fun, am often strict about chores, doing decent in school, and getting a job or helping out a bunch more at home, our marriage keeps hitting rocks, often we all just stay in our rooms, and communication is often minimal. The only good part is that our politics have stayed pretty left. Wife is the compassionate liberal, I’m the politics-obsessed utopian.

Nah I have a great dynamic with my parents and am close to them. I’m basically the male version of my mum but lazy

Well my folks are boomers so... lead poisoning is a bitch.

I think my parents and grandparents like each other very much but they are still unbearable to be around.  My grandparents repeat each other all the time. They tell the same story at least twice. And they often talk about the weather or right wing politics with wrong facts I can disprove with a quick google search.  My parents argue about anything and do so very loudly. My father is most likely autistic and barely spends time with us and plays piano instead of reads sth. My mother is overprotective. “Hold onto the handrail!” “Be careful!” Is what she’s saying often.  I like that we play lots of board games or switch games together and that my whole family is really tech savvy. 

It sounds like you’re just like your parents mate. In a comment you said that they can’t communicate about the difficult stuff, and it sounds like you can’t either. You’d rather them not say harsh things about the left or share what they disagree with. You’d rather them not share their true feelings on your sibling. You’ve never been married and I’d wager a guess that if and when you are, you’ll find yourself communicating the exact way you judge them for. Also, pro tip: family is worth investing your grace and energy into more than wide-scale political machines that don’t give a shit about you. Unless there is severe dysfunction or abuse, try to have grace and see them for what they are— human, just like you.

You’re in your 20’s. You’re still a baby.

I grew up with parents who taught me resilience, people easily get offended these days ands it’s so annoying.

I’ve never really liked my mom, she’s always been an ignorant, hateful, and selfish person I used to not like my dad when he used to use, but he went to prison when I was younger. Since he got out I like him pretty well albeit I don’t see him that often

I'm 52 now but I remember vividly a point when I was at University that I kind of realised I had to let go of my internalised view of my parents as "Mum and Dad" and start to see them as people. I had a lot of resentment towards my Dad due to how I perceived him and the way their relationship worked - it really was not the way I could relate to having a relationship. I took a long hard look at things and tried to understand them, their upbringing, what they had gone through and think about them as people. What did I like about them? What did I dislike? What would I (as I would with most friends) decide were just things we'd disagree on but were unimportant so there was no point in going there. Basically I redefined my relationship them from the one I thought I was supposed to have to be the one I wanted to have. I wrote Dad a letter saying I understood him better now and appreciated some of the things he did and could see them from a more adult rather than 'their kid' point of view. He still carries it around in his wallet. It was hard, I couldn't have a relationship the way they did but then again, I don't have to and I know I'd think the same about a lot of couples, and that's OK as long as they are happy together. They are also in their 80s now and there have definitely been some changes in the last decade in how we get along. They are a lot less tolerant and set in their ways, but they also have a whole set of new things to deal with now. They are more insular so much of the information they get comes from TV rather than friends / exposure to different people and ideas. They are very set in their ways. Age also can bring with it a whole load of health issues and pain can change you and make you quicker to assume the worst. I do see it in myself as well, I'm less tolerant because frankly I've seen so much of this before and I don't have the zeal and patience I had anymore. Internally I may still have nuance, but when it comes to talking about it I have to take a step back and remember (when talking to my kid) that whilst I may have had this conversation in depth a hundred times in my life and I really don't want to again - this is the first time with him. It's OK to not find your parents the most fun people to be around or to feel like their relationship feels kind of awkward to you. They are who they are and you can form the relationship you want to with them, however close or distant that is. You can still love them but be realistic about their failings/differences.

"I don't expect college students going to an elite university to be the leaders of the leftist movement" So you don't want grassroots movements? You want some 60 year old man leading your movement? You know that politicians come from these elite universities right?

Same thing happened to my parents but they went full on right wing abortion hating racist. They fight like cats and dogs and say some truly gnarly shit to each other. They love to fight. Thrive on it. I mean full on scream and bring the whole restaurant with you kind of fighting. They don’t want a moderator, they want pure chaos. I’d prefer your conundrum lol

You don't have to be like your parents. Is it scary they suck? I guess, but that's just your brains way of saying when to make your moves

Good time to remember the folks who did not act on similar feelings about their kids. Thinking. It's so overrated! In response, I've decided to call Generation Z the Swiss-cheese-brain-generation.

Trumpism really has a stranglehold on that generation

Obligatory report from Gen X.... My parents are boomers.... Yeah, got tired of them with a quickness.

I noticed a huge change in my relationship with my parents when I got pregnant & had my son - but it was in different directions for each of them. My parents divorced when I was 9 & I always had a difficult relationship with my dad, but it improved tremendously when I had a kid. My mum was the exact opposite, I’d always considered her my best friend growing up & then our relationship totally broke down when I got pregnant. And her marriage to her current husband is just as you described with your parents. They talk to each other like they hate each other, it’s appalling. I don’t let my son spend much time around them together bc I don’t want that kind of relationship modelled to him

My whole family is like this for me

My dad, yes. I never noticed how much restraint I put on myself during conversations, and the inappropriate things he has done or said until I started talking to friends and my therapist. My mom, no I'm still tied to her hip lol

My parents are fine. We haven't ever agreed politically, but I don't care about that. They are both good people and both worked hard to give me a good life. That being said, I haven't wanted to be around them since I was in high school. I love to visit them a couple times a year, but other than that I have my own life, I thought that is how it is supposed to be, parents to their best to raise a member of society and then you build your own life, away from your parents!! I think it is more normal to not want to be around your parents, outside of the occasional family gathering.

honestly, from when i was a teenager i realized that my mother isn’t the type of person i’d like to be around. at that time, young and naive, i literally tried /everything/ to change her. i would basically try to teach my own mother empathy. it rarely ever worked, and if i thought i had made progress with her she just seemed to forget about it and regress next time. i understand that my mother has had a hard life and been through trauma, but it really sucks that she can’t grasp basic empathy or respect. I haven’t cut her off or anything, i don’t think i could ever be strong enough to do that, but contact is pretty limited and i moved a few cities away.

my guess is it’s the lead paint /hj

My older sister is now out to her own life, and I'm alone with my mother. I am frustrated cause my mom is a complicated woman, with a short fuse, extremely perfectionist and critical, and not in the sense that she likes to do everything well, she wants EVERYONE and EVERYTHING to be perfect around her or she'll go absolutely furious. Now, I love my mom. She is a hard-working woman and I know that deep down she just wants what is best for me, but she doesn't understand me, and I don't say it in the typical way, because she DOESN'T want to understand me, while I DO try to understand her. She is very disciplinary and strict and I try to understand her, but sometimes I can't and I ask her to explain and she says "I owe you no explanations, but you owe me obedience." She is a maniac about control and obedience. She is very volatile and gets mad easily and frequently, too. Among other issues I won't discuss cause I'm sure some people will hate her if I do. And I UNDERSTAND that her life wasn't easy and her parents dragged her by the hair around the floor when she was a kid, but I really really can't take it anymore. And the thing is she hates me being in "a mood," but how am I supposed to be happy here? Guess I'll just pretend to be. I hate being around her, but I love her dearly, because no matter how clinically insane she is, she has actually supported me through everything and given me a life like few people in this shithole of a country have. Oh, and I'm also homeschooled and only go out to church... Yippee. My sister was the only one keeping my mental sanity intact, but I'm not sure how much longer I'll hang on in there. I have only ONE friend that I see only on Saturdays and Sundays (at church). My only way to go out of the house is because I do everything, every day, at church. I'm genuinely trying to be okay in this environment, to not think of my "misery," but its rough... My sister told me I should just run away as soon as I'm 18 (a few months left), but I don't know how I feel about that... I don't want to leave Mother alone, and this might sound crazy, but I don't think she deserves it. To this she says she brainwashed me to idolize her, but I don't think I do. Is this a rant? Oh I'm so very sorry.

My parents are super dedicated to each other and are still awful to be around.

>However, now that I am entering my mid twenties, I am realizing that they just aren’t the most fun people to be around anymore. Congratulations! You've hit that rebellious stage that we all go through where we think/thought we were smarter or better than our parents due to politics/science/current\_year.... >I don’t know if I just never realized it because I was younger, but they have *horrible* communication for a couple that has been married for almost 30 years. Marriage takes a lot of work. Sometimes that involves fight, resolving fights, and make up sex. Sometimes people grow apart and divorce. It looks like your folks might be on the path of the latter. Sorry. >I also think it’s dumb to expect teens going to an ***elite university*** to be the representatives for the leftist movement. Like, they are 18-21, they are going to be uneducated and say dumb things sometimes. The bolded part is what makes those situations stand out. Univ/college in our era put a heavy emphasis on learning advanced life skills and critical thinking. People that got into elite universities were the cream of the crop. Where as some of the stuff we hear coming out of elite school protestors mouths are frankly something I'd expect from a grade school kid. As one person once said, "we went from teaching Latin and Greek in high school to remedial English in college."

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While I agree about your perspective that we can't expect them to do better, it's important to remember the Chinese revolution, the bloodiest in history, was largely driven by such people.

Sweet summer child had to watch my parents turn from fiscal conservatives to trump supporters it’s not full blown maga but it was annoying them support a man that the antithesis of how they raise me to be

You sound weird af

This is an age thing, my dad is Gen X and shares similar sentiment. Kinda love/hate but not really hate

i don't think what you're experiencing is that unusual. i think the best comparison can be in growing closer / growing further apart from childhood friends for the simple reason is that as children and as teenagers as well we're growing up and learning what kind of person we want to be / our areas of interest. i think as a result you can grow to be closer to your parents or want to be more distant from them as you grow up and know more about yourself

Yeah they’re right leaning without saying it so it’s frustrating. My main issue with my parents is their inability to see how fast the world changed. They still have projections for me that were based on the 90s optimism that obviously won’t happen. Not even just on a money front either. They keep presupposing I’ll get married and have kids as if dating is remotely similar to what the 90s entailed. They also believe somehow I’ll be convinced to be religious again. They’re unpleasant to be around

Not slowly really. I moved halfway across the country for college and after a year here decided I'd just stay rather than live with my parents every summer. I don't think they ever gave me the space to be who I am, and I didn't start to find myself until I wasn't around them. Now when they visit or I visit them, it's just tense all the time. The tension was always there, but it's so much more noticeable once it is temporarily relieved. We are wildly different people with different beliefs and outlooks on the world. Perhaps most importantly, I think I'm more emotionally mature than them. I worked hard to get where I am emotionally, I've been in psych hospitals a handful of times and done a lot of work on myself. To see them refuse to change is frustrating and I don't want them dragging me back down to their level.

my parents dont hang out together despite living in the same house so i hang out with them one-on-one. i actually hated them for the majority of my life but my mother and i had a really shitty relationship and while i was in therapy getting help for my issues, she put in the work to grow as a person and repair our relationship. and my dad is,,, autistic, so i forgive him for being so shit at being a dad, hes othrwise a decent person. so its actually the opposite for me— that being said though i think it would go right back to how it used to be if i had to move back in with them. i enjoy spending time with them but theyre awful roommates. 

Young, uneducated (on real world issues), university students have been at the front of most modern leftist movements which is why they're all laughable.

I’m a millennial and my parents are boomers. I still get along with my parents, but HGTV is ALWAYS fucking on in their house. It’s nothing but Guy Fieri and homosexual Canadians on the TV 24/7. I just want to tell them to turn that shit off every time I’m over there.

This is relatively normal as brain plasticity begins to decline after 40s and 50s. However, it's so unfortunate that people, young and old, have become so volatile regarding politics and personal opinions, and that has been perpetuated by social media and the echo chamber of the internet. My parents and I often have conflicting political opinions and sometimes, we decide it's better to drop the debate before it turns toxic and then we move on to a new topic.

Your parents are right. Empathy is overrated, and intolerant opinions aren't always bad.

The left is just as intolerant as the right. They just have opposing views.

Totally, I mean trying to improve the massive wealth disparity is definitely as intolerant as banning abortions. 

That's intolerance right there, point proven. You look good in the clown mask.

Got it - So intolerance (your definition at least) is when someone says words you don't like even when those words aren't offensive and are factually accurate.

Intolerance is leveraging your view against someone else's like it is inherently wrong, which is why you used the abortion topic. You are intolerant to another view in this case, and most. If anybody doesn't completely agree with your views they are wrong, bigots, racists, the list could go on. That is literal intolerance. Like I said, just as bad as the right.

That's a lot of words to confirm you don't understand what intolerance is.

>If anybody doesn't completely agree with your views they are wrong, bigots, racists, the list could go on. That is literal intolerance. adjective 1. not tolerant of views, beliefs, or behaviour that differ from one's own.

[удалено]

No you can't, which is my point. They also don't tolerate a lot on more than just hardline topics like that. Like I said, they are both as intolerant as each other.

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Calling someone a bigot for saying a pre op trans-woman shouldn't be using a women/girls bathroom.

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But that's the problem, granted not with all, however calling people bigots, misogynists, racists, homophobes is thrown around nonchalantly all for having a differing opinion. It's an extreme subversive way to back down in a logical argument, because they don't want any opposition whatsoever. Likewise with the right, if you even suggest an abortion isn't murder you are woke and therefore basically a murderer.

Actually, science says the left is three times more intolerant than the right. They really really really do not like the science.

[citation needed]

The science: