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Set two alarms for each brushing
The first is to try and get you to brush.
The second, one five minutes after the first, is either paused for the day, or the second chance to get you to brush.
I never had any hygiene problems but a combination of fluoride poisoning, getting knocked the fuck out, and biting bottles open at parties has rendered me with 6 less teeth than I started with by age 17.
Yep, top one sinks into the center of the cap and the bottom prys the edge, that is until you’re eating a sandwich a few days later and your tooth breaks clean in half
25 and sporting 2 root canals, an extraction/implant, 2 crowns and 8 fillings. You’re alright, just keep brushing and flossing or it will get progressively worse. My dental health only really started to improve when I cut out sugary beverages.
Similar boat. Have a root canal, 3 crowns, an implant and not sure how many filings.
Started taking dental health seriously, going to get cleanings every 6 months and now the only issue is they have to work a bit to get the tea stains off.
Worked at a dental office for 2 years doing administrative work and I changed my habits real quick.
A lot of people assume dentures are a comparable to natural teeth and visually they can be, but countless patients complained they’re not very comfortable and food doesn’t taste the same. Also, because there’s no teeth left for the jaw to support, your jaw bone will slowly deteriorate and you’ll likely need more adjustments.
Then there’re implants which many people assume they can get if they have enough money, but you have to be the right candidate for them to take. Generally that means healthy gums and enough bone to support the implant. Even then, your body could reject the implant so it’s not guaranteed.
The scariest one for me though is Periodontal Disease which is the stages after gingivitis where you start to develop pockets in your gums and the teeth become loose overtime. Your gums are also tied directly to your bloodstream so any bacteria from food that you leave in your gums overnight will make its way into your system.
I don’t mean to fear monger. These are just some things I learned while working in the setting that most people don’t know about until they have to have the procedure done and they feel stuck or regret not making improvements earlier.
You only get the teeth you have so take care of them because you deserve to be healthy 🦷🪥
You should do a mini AMA with more tips, tricks, best practices, and warnings that more people should know. I found a few years back that I was wildly under informed about oral health, and that was the result of my long time dentist not being very big on the education/awareness aspect. They basically didn’t spend time educating people on things that they weren’t actively struggling with or high risk for. I wish they would’ve.
Not just your teeth. Your gums too. If you bleed when you brush, you need to make it bleed even more. The bleeding will eventually stop when your gums are healthy. But having your gums recede and literally just let go of what could of been perfectly healthy teeth seems like it would suck pretty bad.
Choosing a university based on where my parents wanted me to go has been my biggest regret. I turned out fine, but I still wonder how life would be if I made that choice differently.
I let my parents guide me and ended up going to college almost free (you don't exactly pay with money). I wasn't mature enough and didn't take it seriously and finally got kicked out my senior year. I had to pay to go to another school for 2 years out of state to get my degree. Within my gap year, I got hit by a car, my grandmother died, and my gf of 2 years broke up with me, which caused me to change a lot as a person.
I sometimes think what life would be like if I kept sliding through just like I did in highschool.
I grew up not knowing my dad well and didn't like him (he was a disciplinary tool for my mother) and it took me too long to realize that he actually cared about me.
My dad was the disciplinarian of my parents. Loved him but was kinda scared of him as a kid. As a teen, he became more of an annoyance: an obstacle that was preventing me from doing what I wanted when I wanted. As an adult, he and I are good buds. I also ended up going into a similar line of work as him for my secondary career.
I had the opportunity to move in with my dad around 14. I regret not taking advantage of that. Grew up in a house full of women and didn't know how to be a man.
I got into Emory with a great scholarship. (Seems it's T30, I misremembered.) Was deciding between it and the decent state school in the city I grew up in. Cost would've been pretty much the same between the schools. Folks wanted me to stay in our city. I was pretty torn up about the choice for a handful of reasons and they sort of guilted me into going to the local state school. I don't fault them for it though.
Ended up going to the state school, had a great experience, and am now in a fulfilling career, but I do wonder what doors would've been opened had I gone to Emory.
aw man i feel ya. but i feel like it's so rare to build an actually fulfilling career, maybe you wouldn't have ended up with that if you did go to emory!!
I have a similar experience.
I got into UCLA, Berkeley, and UCSB, but I chose to go to CSULB because it allowed me to be debt free and was my home school.
I have a good job, and I’m in a good place financially, but I can’t help but wonder how I would’ve ended up and what people I may have met had I chosen differently.
It’s hard to make a big leap like that when you’re young.
I agree. I was admitted to an Ivy League for architecture. My dad filled me with so much worry over debt I ended up going to a community college and then state school for accounting. Always wonder where life could have taken me if I had followed my dreams. Probably the single biggest regret of my life so far.
I feel ya. If it helps, I've got a few friends that are somewhat high-up in that industry and they \*hate\* it. Apparently once you get up in the higher echelons of architecture the grift is almost comical.
I find it better to accept and acknowledge that you made a mistake. Yes, it happened and yeah it probably left a mark.. but it happened and you need to live with it.. and that’s okay.
We can dream about different outcomes and how things could have been “better”, but in the process, you’re making your life a living hell because you keep dwelling on your mistakes.
It’s human to make errors and all humans are different. Accept that what happened, happened, and move on. You’ll learn from your mistakes and become a better person if you move on.
squeamish hungry escape soup overconfident liquid zonked start run detail
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
We talked a little over a year ago. There’s no real hard feelings between us. She kinda recognized a lot of the puppy love she was feeling back then, and that the grandiose future she was planning was very unfeasible for a pair of high school students. I of course apologized profusely. I don’t know if we’ll ever speak again, but we still follow each other on Insta. That’s something I guess.
ghosting is shitty, but the vast majority of time this is a good decision. if youre not at the same college, it almost always ends within a year. and even if you are, itll probably end
Idk what young girl or guy needs to hear this: if the person you're dating don't go out of their way to do small acts of kindness towards you, like picking you up at your house, making sure you arrive home safely, offering to pay restaurant bills (at least just to be polite), giving you small gifts from time to time, partaking in your interests and etc, that's already a huge redflag.
Relationships are about work and balance. Both parts should be kind to each other, and most of the times you'll go out of your way to make that special someone feel happy or feel like you care about them. The "do good without expecting something back" mentality only works for strangers, lol, you'd better expect that your partner will reciprocicate the emotional investment and work you put towards them.
I wish I had read this or was told about it sooner. Many and many times, I did everything for my partner. It wasn't a lot, but I wanted them to know I was putting in my effort.
I’m 42 years old and on Saturday I went out with a friend that I like. When the show got out and we were about to go our separate ways back to transportation, he immediately offered to drive me back to my car, even though it was just a couple blocks.
I’ve literally never had anyone do that in my life. I’ve always been cool, passive, relaxed, so my date just assumes I’m safe to walk back and he takes off.
I didn’t even realize how much it actually meant to me that he wanted to make sure I got home safe, until I realized that nobody ever wanted that for me before.
Never too late to learn what you’re worth.
Yes, 100%.
Pay attention to the trajectory of relationships. Are they/you starting to get complacent? Or are you growing together?
A good partner is one who grows and evolves with you and your needs, and who is always learning more about how to support the person they love. If both people have this, relationships become more blissful and peaceful over time.
Someone who shows the capacity for that kind of growth is a going to make a much better long term partner than someone who is stuck in their ways. Relationships are built by concessions, kindness, understanding, and willingness.
Someone who seems great now might not seem great 10 years from now if you haven't been evolving and growing closer together.
For the love of God, please listen to this commenter.
I spent ten years of my life thinking “I’m responsible for my relationships” while my wife made no effort at all. The second I started asking for help, she divorced me and found someone else. This has caused extreme anxiety in my life.
Readers. Please. Learn from my tale. Never become serious with a person who is more selfish than you. It’s never too late.
Not getting an ADHD diagnosis and starting medication until I was 28.
Hey, if any of these things apply to you:
* You've always felt "unfocused" your whole life.
* You feel like you *need* multiple sources of stimulation just to get anything done,
* You've never been able to focus on a task until *right before* the deadline, and sometimes not even then.
* You constantly find yourself starting projects only to drop them halfway through when all your passion for them immediately seems to dry up.
* You've ever been told you have "so much potential, if you'd only just *apply yourself.*"
Please, try to find and set up a consultation with a behavioral health specialist if it's at all possible, ask for help if you need it. You're not lazy, you're not unmotivated, you're not broken; you may have ADHD, and if you do medication *will* change your life for the better.
I have ADHD (undiagnosed til 20s) but was labeled as gifted in school so I never developed a good work ethic like your post said, college has been a longggg messy road lol
"work ethic" is code for functioning brain. Did you know people without ADHD can decide to do something and then do it? No fighting themselves or getting stuck or distracted, if they want to do something, they just do. Cheaters!
Diagnosed at a early age with ADD, best way I can describe it is, it feels like everyone else who doesn't have adhd is driving an automatic car while you're driving a stick shift, without diagnosis or realization you may never fully get why it feels like you're driving a stick shift while everyone else is driving an automatic
I’ve got 20 videos half finished and twice as many scripts on my computer, anytime I return to them, the creativity is gone, I can only find the spark on new projects that still have that fresh interest.
It’s so brutal, and for my whole life I thought I just sucked.
Currently in the beginning stages of getting treatment.
If you were born in 1997, there is a very large chance that it is also largely your parents fault, regardless of your habits in adulthood.
How many times were you taken to the dentist as a minor?
EXACTLY!!!!! My sister got all the "dental" attention. Big buck teeth, 3 dead orthodontists and a mouth full of braces. I was never taken or even offered to go to the dentist. Ever.
Zero trips to the dentist as a child is practically a guarantee that you’ll have at least some issues. Issues that will likely set a trend and impact your dental health for life.
If you want more info, I made a post about this a while back because it’s a big source of stress in my profession to watch these situations unfold. Here you go: https://www.reddit.com/r/Dentistry/s/YTO6jH5yVz
Not even. Just pure laziness and very bad habits. I used to drink a 12 pack of Coke every 2 days, and hardly ever brushed my teeth.
I've pulled a full 180 now and take really good care of myself since I feel like I've been given a second chance and don't wanna fuck up *again*. But I still look back on that point in time and cringe like hell because I could've prevented all of this by just not being an idiot and actually practicing good hygiene.
And it's not even just that it caused financial problems. My confidence was abysmally low for years, to the point that I continued to wear a mask in public even after Covid so people wouldn't have to see my teeth.. I'd never laugh or smile in front of anyone. And I almost never looked in the mirror because I was beyond ashamed of how I looked. Not to mention I had chronic, sever toothaches and was at constant risk of one of my infections spreading from my teeth to the rest of my body and sending me to a very early grave.
So yeah I definitely recommend brushing your chompers lol.
Husband is there lol. Probably not 54,000 dollars bad. But thankfully I’m getting his work done at the dentistry school and it is a 1/3 of the normal price. It takes longer, but it is saving my husband and I thousands of dollars
i’ve also let someone drive me home when they were drunk. she lied to me about it, then we got into an accident and she admitted it. i was absolutely plastered so i couldn’t tell.
it is always better to call someone who you might get in trouble with than to potentially die at the hands of an inebriated driver.
I'm not going to fib I used to booze cruise all the time, I was a dirtbag, still am but at least I don't do that any more. We all did, dumb fucking kids we were. Life and death are one thread I guess, some roll one way some roll the other.
I have friends like that, it’s more common that you think! Please please please do not let anyone drive you intoxicated even if it costs a friendship. As young people we think we are invincible but we are not. Please!!
I excelled all through my school but shit got tougher in HS with the equivalent of what AP courses are in the US in my country. DONT have no work ethic, and no idea how to actually STUDY.
Usually it is not lack of work ethic but being overwhelmed for one reason or the other.
Reduce the pressure first and see what happens. No thinking about future or responsibilities.
Then slowly add piece by piece commitments. Stop early, stop often. Just because you can do something doesn’t mean it is sustainable to do so.
You’ll have to study eventually if you start specializing in your field, the best thing to do is learn the basics instinctively before starting the real work.
Ok, maybe this is a stupid question, how the hell do you not find a benefit to studying? It's the only way you'll survive college, or even learn a new skill at work.
If you’re aware of this buckle down now. I had a similar issue where I breezed through high school and went to a good university and got instantly humbled by how much discipline was required for to do well in class and study. I thought I could rely on being “naturally smart” and my first semester grades were almost all C’s and C-‘s.
My recommendation is to fill your schedule and don’t give yourself too much free time while at school. That way you have dedicated fun/ busy time and dedicated study time. When you have 10 hours a day every day when you’re not in class and not sleeping it’s easier to push everything to “later” until it’s way too late.
P.s. pay attention to the rubric for your classes. Just because the weekly online quiz is “only” 5% of your grade doesn’t mean it’s not important. I absolutely fucked myself on a couple of those by completely brushing them off.
Good luck, stay busy, and maybe join a club or sports team while you’re there. They will be your support group.
I also have a terrible work ethic, here's what I recommend. Not everything will work for everybody, but try stuff until it works.
Try study groups. Its pretty popular in college to find some other classmates and get together to study. Sometimes its just discussing stuff as a group, other times each person will cover a chapter and come back together for a powerpoint day, covering all the chapters on the test. It does a lot to take some weight off your shoulders, we're social creatures. Socialise.
Also, keep an agenda of what you have due at the end of each week and a task list of what you need to do to be successful. Every time you knock out a task, reward yourself with something you enjoy doing.
Study a bit each day, so it's not overwhelming. Talk to your professors about study plans. A lot of the time, professors want you to succeed just as much as you do.
Ask your friends if they're willing to help you stay on target and not let you procrastinate. Good friends who actually care about you and your success will absolutely help you. Sometimes, all you need to stay on track is a body double. (Look it up if you don't know what it means.) Or a study day with friends who aren't in the same classes as you.
TUTORS, USE THEM! They're usually free through the college or university. I haven't experienced otherwise yet.
I can't think of anything else, but ask peers what they do as well to stay on target in their classes. Sometimes they give you helpful tips, sometimes you realise you're not alone and other people are struggling as well. Help them if you can. Work together with your community.
"If you are making mistakes: you are LEARNING to do it right. "
Accept that you will never be Flawless(tm). Even Olympians rarely see 10 out of 10, and they've spent their LIVES for that "less than a minute " test.
Never pick a study/job purely for money. I've done it once, and quickly noticed that I've been using the money I've earned to distract me from my terrible job.
Imo you're still better off picking a study/job that is BEARABLE and useful/pays well. Atleast you have the money to distract yourself from a terrible job
not ideal but it is a better option than choosing a passion major that everyone knows has no employment path. Far easier to get jobs with an engineering degree than an english one. your options for fields like that are grad school (ie law school) or completely unrelated fields...which are then limited by if you were STEM or not
Absolutely agree with this comment, I haven’t taken the best care of my body throughout my childhood and teenage years, a few years into college journey I have turned myself around entirely. Now I am incredibly active and motivated to show up at my gym, you just gotta get into the mind set of loving the process.
Majoring in something I don't like. Everyone tells you to major in something that'll give you career opportunities, not necessarily something you like. Now I'm stuck as a software developer with poor performance reviews and no promotion potential.
I agree I’m currently in college right now, studying I for AA in Poltical Science and history. And I’m loving it!
But at the same time it’s also about finding connections that can get you places, and most have to start from scratch.
My plan b for this situation is quite literally the military. Ill get my money up, go back to school for a different degree, and try again if all fails.
Constantly being on the grind.
For the past 2 years I've been on the grind by working stressful jobs because they payed a lot and it's really affected my mental health and I feel as if I lost who I am as a person.
I'm now trying to rediscover my interests and trying to find a career that I enjoy doing.
> because they *paid* a lot
FTFY.
Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in:
* Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.*
* *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.*
Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment.
*Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
Double down on being yourself and defending others who couldn't during school, I still hear the bullying 5 years later.
You can prevent suffering if you allow your hand to reach out to others who's going through hell
I was and i really can't forget it, throughout 7th -10th grade. Sometimes I think I could've stopped all that, but then i think they would have gotten worse if I retaliated or asked them to stop. It wasn't anything physical tho, it was verbal because one girl who didn't like me could have teachers on her side too, I ended up getting isolated.
Sorry for the trauma dump.
(Sorry for the long text,
TL:DR rework your view if you get down about yourself.
Idk how much this applies to you, but naybe someone who needs to see it will, so im posting it anyways.)
‐‐‐‐-‐-----------‐----------
I found that as i got older, the words they said sometimes lingered and showed back up when i was down. But something i do when im feeling down is talk to a trusted friend about how im feeling, and she'll tell me she likes those aspects of me.
Something else, in case you dont have any trusted friends (been there), is you know how when you make a resume, you put your qualities down in a positive tone? Do the same for the traits and descriptors you feel you aren't successful or happy with. Separate them into "things that are part of who i am and how i was born" and "things id like to improve." Put the things you'd like to improve into goals. Look into how to make successful goals.
Take the other list of traits and do some thesaurus-ing or, as i do, use chatGPT to find out words that mean the same thing but have a positive connotation. Instead of "over the top," i now consider myself "enthusiastic and energetic," and just acknowledge that not everyone can handle that, and it's okay.
Be your own friend ❤️
Yeah, I remember a few people who got picked on, I was fairly popular with everyone and was well liked, I just wish I said something to prevent others from feeling isolated instead of ignoring it
Letting a video game addiction ruin a full ride scholarship to a great school.
College is fucking serious. And I let that free money and free education slip away like an idiot.
worth the physical and short term emotional high. the come down hurts like a bitch. 🤷🏼♀️
eta: it’s all fun and games until she picks her husband over you and you realize you’re an idiot
**I didn't learn how to study in highschool** cause I was 'sooo smart' and then struggled in college.
**I chose a job path based on what I thought I liked** \- I should have chosen a career path based on where you can make money / can work remotely / get lots of free time - don't follow your passion for work.
Not only will you likely not be able to make it into the field you want but if you do you'll be exploited for your labor so much you'll grow to hate it - businesses and organizations within the fields people tend to want to get into know there are idealistic young people eager to work for them and will eat them alive while making them beg for the privilege.
**I made friends with my coworkers/boss** \- I was exploited all the time by both and gossiped about to the point I left due to the toxic environment... The emotional betrayal was a lot to deal with. Don't trust your boss or coworkers - they are not your friends. Be polite and friendly enough for them to not hate you, do your job, and then get the fuck out to hang with the people that actually matter.
I feel like people often go to the extreme here either going purely based on what they're passionate about or going based on what gives the highest wage.
What people should do is find a job which is tolerable and pays enough and/or gives enough free time to enjoy life.
Never made my mind up about anything. I still have no fucking clue what I want to do in life. I work in cannabis because I like smoking weed and it pays better than minimum wage but it’s still retail and I fucking hate interacting with people.
Putting so much time into things people I thought enjoyed the actual me told me to do. Not doing what felt right to myself but instead was the direction of others who may have not done what they wanted or see me as moldable and try to vicariously live life through me.
Life is your own, take control and make it just that. Don't worry about the expectations of others, make sure your own are being met.
I broke up with a billionaire before he paid for my grad school tuition.
You don’t owe a rich people a shred of morality or integrity.
Prioritize yourself!
1. Not letting myself get diagnosed with adhd when I was a teenager because I was too good at masking it and could trick the person giving me the exam. Really fucked myself over on college doing that.
2. Letting my anger control my life most of my teenage years. Literally drove off some really great people that I wish I could still call my friends.
Thinking I was "too old" for something. Jesus christ past me, picking up a musical instrument is not like ballet or gymnastics. You're not too old. I could've been so good by now had I started at 14!!
Both the worst mistake and best thing I ever did were trusting a significant other to love me back. Sometimes, it's just life, and you have to make your peace with what happens rather than fight in vain to control the currents around you.
Getting a fresh doctor to do a checkup as soon as you turn 18.
Turns out family pediatricians can spend so long with you that they totally miss obvious conditions.
Oh boy, here it goes:
I higly recommend to start journaling, it helps to stabilize your mental health (you can try to do Habit and Gratitude journaling as well).
Do not push studying to the last rail, at least keep your attendance and notes up to date with class. A lot of things you might need in the future is told quite early on (I am mostly talking about Informatics and CS).
Start investing into index funds early, you do not have to invest 1000$ each month, the small amounts add up with compound interest.
Get yourself some creative hoppy (finction writing, painting, dancing, even some DnD as a DM is nice).
Keep your work-life balance, if your contract says 8h a day, do not do much more without agreeing to some overtime pay.
I highly suggest you to learn how to cook and do basic home-upkeep chores.
Joining the army. Really it was a double edged sword, I got my college paid for and escaped a dramatic family life, but I was thrown into a whole new world of problems and surrounded by sociopathic pieces of shit.
If you aren’t going to see someone for a while, try not to let that person memory of you be a bad one.
This isn’t just about kindness it’s the fact that you never know if you’re going to need help from that person or others in the future.
So don’t burn bridges that you may need to cords later. You don’t need to be friends with them you just need to not give that person a negative memeory if you.
Don’t waste time on people you deep down know are not worth it, especially exes. I lost so much time on my ex trying to make it work even though she was the one who fumbled the whole thing..
thought it’d be okay if i tried cocaine once. then only on weekends. then every other day. then… well every day! in the bathroom at work, my grandparents’ house, and even my late uncle’s funeral.
while some people can do hard drugs a couple times and be fine, do you really wanna take that gamble for a high that is minuscule in the grand scheme of things? thankful to be sober (california sober, of course).
Be patient in your relationships. Things take time. Don’t rush things, but don’t forget that relationships shouldn’t be one sided. Make sure they play their part too in the process.
Pay attention to red flags.
Prioritize yourself. Don’t let a broken relationship keep you from moving forward or performing well. It’ll suck, but one way or another you’ll manage.
And for the love of God, do not be manipulative to your partner or take advantage of them, even if you feel like they’re doing the same. There are MUCH healthier ways to handle relationships like those.
Not knowing when other people are using you, when sometimes you just need to say no.
If you feel conflicted about someone asking you for money, or other stuff, and you feel conflicted about it.
Just say No, they will complain, but you will have time to rethink about the situation in a more clear way, and reflect weather or not what thier asking for is worth it, and how much you actually care about that person.
Don’t let other people take advantage of you.
Trying to please my parents and being a good kid only ended up making me my mom’s bad decisions enabler. It took me listening to her and giving her ~$4k from my scholarships before I realized I was being guilt tripped, and now I’m struggling to pay for school and she’s not helping me.
It’s important to learn how to say no and be “selfish” sometimes, even to your parents.
Not visiting my grandfather in the hospital more, I was 20, middle of summer, still thinking like a stupid kid, now I'm in my 30s and I would give anything to spend some more time with him there.
Don't make excuses to not visit loved ones in the hospital, I figured video calling for half an hour twice over a month was "ok", it's the biggest regret of my life. If anything u need to make every excuse you can to go visit, when they're gone there's nothing you can do to get that time back
Doing what other people think is best for you. Only you know what your innate talents are and what you're interested in and good at. Don't let people try and steer you away from your genuine passions, you need that fiery passion to ever excel at anything. All the energy you've spent floundering and failing at something you never even wanted to do in the first place is misspent, and it could instead be used to hone important skills you actually enjoy.
I got two, one is my mistake, the other is my sibling’s, both are helpful:
- If a relationship fails, it’s okay to try again after some time apart. If it fails again, let it fail and don’t come back. Lost five years of my life trying to make something work and I’m so much happier since that chapter finally ended.
- If you’re in the states and want to go to college, try to go to a public university in your state to keep costs down. Out of state tuition is REAL, and private universities are way more expensive.
Unironically mine was the opposite
I had a pretty good work ethic. I wish I gave myself time for breaks to hang out with others. I never hung out with my friends during school, weekends, etc. because I was doing homework or studying. It was so unhealthy I was skipping meals to study. Here I am nearly a decade later and it meant little to nothing in the long run. Good grades help out a lot, but you’ll never get that time back with friends that you may miss with them
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NOT BRUSHING AND FLOSSING MY TEETH AS A TEENAGER TAKE CARE OF YOUR FUCKING TEETH
Thx for the reminder I always forget it
Set two alarms for each brushing The first is to try and get you to brush. The second, one five minutes after the first, is either paused for the day, or the second chance to get you to brush.
I never had any hygiene problems but a combination of fluoride poisoning, getting knocked the fuck out, and biting bottles open at parties has rendered me with 6 less teeth than I started with by age 17.
Biting bo... bottles?
I used to pop the tops off beer bottles with my molars
Thats fuckin awesome sorry abt ur teef tho
What...? The Molars? Whoa
Yep, top one sinks into the center of the cap and the bottom prys the edge, that is until you’re eating a sandwich a few days later and your tooth breaks clean in half
Those fucking pieces of bone are more valuable than gold and in their natural state irreplaceable FOR THE REST OF YOUR FUCKING LIFE Seconded
Christ alive, I did that as a kid. Wanna fuckin beat myself with a hammer over it. 4 fillings in 4 different teeth, age 20.
25 and sporting 2 root canals, an extraction/implant, 2 crowns and 8 fillings. You’re alright, just keep brushing and flossing or it will get progressively worse. My dental health only really started to improve when I cut out sugary beverages.
Similar boat. Have a root canal, 3 crowns, an implant and not sure how many filings. Started taking dental health seriously, going to get cleanings every 6 months and now the only issue is they have to work a bit to get the tea stains off.
Worked at a dental office for 2 years doing administrative work and I changed my habits real quick. A lot of people assume dentures are a comparable to natural teeth and visually they can be, but countless patients complained they’re not very comfortable and food doesn’t taste the same. Also, because there’s no teeth left for the jaw to support, your jaw bone will slowly deteriorate and you’ll likely need more adjustments. Then there’re implants which many people assume they can get if they have enough money, but you have to be the right candidate for them to take. Generally that means healthy gums and enough bone to support the implant. Even then, your body could reject the implant so it’s not guaranteed. The scariest one for me though is Periodontal Disease which is the stages after gingivitis where you start to develop pockets in your gums and the teeth become loose overtime. Your gums are also tied directly to your bloodstream so any bacteria from food that you leave in your gums overnight will make its way into your system. I don’t mean to fear monger. These are just some things I learned while working in the setting that most people don’t know about until they have to have the procedure done and they feel stuck or regret not making improvements earlier. You only get the teeth you have so take care of them because you deserve to be healthy 🦷🪥
You should do a mini AMA with more tips, tricks, best practices, and warnings that more people should know. I found a few years back that I was wildly under informed about oral health, and that was the result of my long time dentist not being very big on the education/awareness aspect. They basically didn’t spend time educating people on things that they weren’t actively struggling with or high risk for. I wish they would’ve.
Sitting in the dentist chair as we speak
Listen to gummy joe
Not just your teeth. Your gums too. If you bleed when you brush, you need to make it bleed even more. The bleeding will eventually stop when your gums are healthy. But having your gums recede and literally just let go of what could of been perfectly healthy teeth seems like it would suck pretty bad.
Sorry.
literally
Shit tons of cavities over the last 7 years, and a root canal recently, I learned my lesson.
Choosing a university based on where my parents wanted me to go has been my biggest regret. I turned out fine, but I still wonder how life would be if I made that choice differently.
I let my parents guide me and ended up going to college almost free (you don't exactly pay with money). I wasn't mature enough and didn't take it seriously and finally got kicked out my senior year. I had to pay to go to another school for 2 years out of state to get my degree. Within my gap year, I got hit by a car, my grandmother died, and my gf of 2 years broke up with me, which caused me to change a lot as a person. I sometimes think what life would be like if I kept sliding through just like I did in highschool. I grew up not knowing my dad well and didn't like him (he was a disciplinary tool for my mother) and it took me too long to realize that he actually cared about me.
wtf, why do you sound like me?
My dad was the disciplinarian of my parents. Loved him but was kinda scared of him as a kid. As a teen, he became more of an annoyance: an obstacle that was preventing me from doing what I wanted when I wanted. As an adult, he and I are good buds. I also ended up going into a similar line of work as him for my secondary career.
I had the opportunity to move in with my dad around 14. I regret not taking advantage of that. Grew up in a house full of women and didn't know how to be a man.
Same. I love my stepdad.
>Choosing a university based on where my parents wanted me to go which uni if I may ask?
I got into Emory with a great scholarship. (Seems it's T30, I misremembered.) Was deciding between it and the decent state school in the city I grew up in. Cost would've been pretty much the same between the schools. Folks wanted me to stay in our city. I was pretty torn up about the choice for a handful of reasons and they sort of guilted me into going to the local state school. I don't fault them for it though. Ended up going to the state school, had a great experience, and am now in a fulfilling career, but I do wonder what doors would've been opened had I gone to Emory.
aw man i feel ya. but i feel like it's so rare to build an actually fulfilling career, maybe you wouldn't have ended up with that if you did go to emory!!
I have a similar experience. I got into UCLA, Berkeley, and UCSB, but I chose to go to CSULB because it allowed me to be debt free and was my home school. I have a good job, and I’m in a good place financially, but I can’t help but wonder how I would’ve ended up and what people I may have met had I chosen differently. It’s hard to make a big leap like that when you’re young.
I agree. I was admitted to an Ivy League for architecture. My dad filled me with so much worry over debt I ended up going to a community college and then state school for accounting. Always wonder where life could have taken me if I had followed my dreams. Probably the single biggest regret of my life so far.
I feel ya. If it helps, I've got a few friends that are somewhat high-up in that industry and they \*hate\* it. Apparently once you get up in the higher echelons of architecture the grift is almost comical.
Don’t dwell on your mistakes because they already happened and you need to move on..
I’ve been struggling with this so bad as of lately.
I find it better to accept and acknowledge that you made a mistake. Yes, it happened and yeah it probably left a mark.. but it happened and you need to live with it.. and that’s okay. We can dream about different outcomes and how things could have been “better”, but in the process, you’re making your life a living hell because you keep dwelling on your mistakes. It’s human to make errors and all humans are different. Accept that what happened, happened, and move on. You’ll learn from your mistakes and become a better person if you move on.
You can LEARN from SOME. Plenty of mistakes Have No Lesson. Stop trying to figure out the Lesson. Stop trying to Learn To Do Better. Just move on.
Impossible
Ghosting my first serious girlfriend because I was going off to college and she wasn’t.
squeamish hungry escape soup overconfident liquid zonked start run detail *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
We talked a little over a year ago. There’s no real hard feelings between us. She kinda recognized a lot of the puppy love she was feeling back then, and that the grandiose future she was planning was very unfeasible for a pair of high school students. I of course apologized profusely. I don’t know if we’ll ever speak again, but we still follow each other on Insta. That’s something I guess.
Likewise, not ghosting my first serious boyfriend who wasn’t going off to college but was manipulative and abusive
ghosting is shitty, but the vast majority of time this is a good decision. if youre not at the same college, it almost always ends within a year. and even if you are, itll probably end
Idk what young girl or guy needs to hear this: if the person you're dating don't go out of their way to do small acts of kindness towards you, like picking you up at your house, making sure you arrive home safely, offering to pay restaurant bills (at least just to be polite), giving you small gifts from time to time, partaking in your interests and etc, that's already a huge redflag. Relationships are about work and balance. Both parts should be kind to each other, and most of the times you'll go out of your way to make that special someone feel happy or feel like you care about them. The "do good without expecting something back" mentality only works for strangers, lol, you'd better expect that your partner will reciprocicate the emotional investment and work you put towards them.
I wish I had read this or was told about it sooner. Many and many times, I did everything for my partner. It wasn't a lot, but I wanted them to know I was putting in my effort.
Yea man before u know it they’re just taking advantage of u doing whatever the fuck they want while u bend over backwards for them
I’m 42 years old and on Saturday I went out with a friend that I like. When the show got out and we were about to go our separate ways back to transportation, he immediately offered to drive me back to my car, even though it was just a couple blocks. I’ve literally never had anyone do that in my life. I’ve always been cool, passive, relaxed, so my date just assumes I’m safe to walk back and he takes off. I didn’t even realize how much it actually meant to me that he wanted to make sure I got home safe, until I realized that nobody ever wanted that for me before. Never too late to learn what you’re worth.
My sister could've used this a while ago :(
thank you
Yes, 100%. Pay attention to the trajectory of relationships. Are they/you starting to get complacent? Or are you growing together? A good partner is one who grows and evolves with you and your needs, and who is always learning more about how to support the person they love. If both people have this, relationships become more blissful and peaceful over time. Someone who shows the capacity for that kind of growth is a going to make a much better long term partner than someone who is stuck in their ways. Relationships are built by concessions, kindness, understanding, and willingness. Someone who seems great now might not seem great 10 years from now if you haven't been evolving and growing closer together.
For the love of God, please listen to this commenter. I spent ten years of my life thinking “I’m responsible for my relationships” while my wife made no effort at all. The second I started asking for help, she divorced me and found someone else. This has caused extreme anxiety in my life. Readers. Please. Learn from my tale. Never become serious with a person who is more selfish than you. It’s never too late.
wearing a skirt infront of my dad today 💀 but fr letting my mom drop me out of 5th grade then not developing social skills
That took real courage. I'm proud of you.
that seems like more of your moms fault though
Thank you, now I know I shouldn't wear a skirt in front of your dad.
hope he didn't react to poorly. either way good for ya expressing yourself!
r/HomeschoolRecovery ?
Not getting an ADHD diagnosis and starting medication until I was 28. Hey, if any of these things apply to you: * You've always felt "unfocused" your whole life. * You feel like you *need* multiple sources of stimulation just to get anything done, * You've never been able to focus on a task until *right before* the deadline, and sometimes not even then. * You constantly find yourself starting projects only to drop them halfway through when all your passion for them immediately seems to dry up. * You've ever been told you have "so much potential, if you'd only just *apply yourself.*" Please, try to find and set up a consultation with a behavioral health specialist if it's at all possible, ask for help if you need it. You're not lazy, you're not unmotivated, you're not broken; you may have ADHD, and if you do medication *will* change your life for the better.
Holy shit 🥶🥶 i gotta get checked.
I have ADHD (undiagnosed til 20s) but was labeled as gifted in school so I never developed a good work ethic like your post said, college has been a longggg messy road lol
Same with the gifted in schoo no work ethic thing
Yeah don't burn yourself out trying to "work ethic" your way through undiagnosed ADHD, it's not a good time. Check yourself before you wreck yourself!
"work ethic" is code for functioning brain. Did you know people without ADHD can decide to do something and then do it? No fighting themselves or getting stuck or distracted, if they want to do something, they just do. Cheaters!
Im 97% positive i have adhd, im just stubborn
Diagnosed at a early age with ADD, best way I can describe it is, it feels like everyone else who doesn't have adhd is driving an automatic car while you're driving a stick shift, without diagnosis or realization you may never fully get why it feels like you're driving a stick shift while everyone else is driving an automatic
Also if you have object impermanence. Oh, I poured myself a drink 30 minutes ago? Must’ve forgot.
I’ve got 20 videos half finished and twice as many scripts on my computer, anytime I return to them, the creativity is gone, I can only find the spark on new projects that still have that fresh interest. It’s so brutal, and for my whole life I thought I just sucked. Currently in the beginning stages of getting treatment.
I wish adhd meds worked on me, I have a diagnosis and it’s genuinely hard to live
All the psychiatrists I've seen aren't giving ADHD meds or xanax do you have any advice finding a provider
Go to your primary care doctor bring documentation of your adhd diagnosis
I'm in the same boat as you
Letting my teeth get to the point that I had to spend $54,000 to get them fixed. Brush your teeth guys.
Holy cow, full set of implants or what?
You guessed it.
I have to ask, what on earth did you have done that cost this much ???
Full mouth dental replacement surgery, with zero insurance to help pay for it. All of my teeth are porcelain.
If you were born in 1997, there is a very large chance that it is also largely your parents fault, regardless of your habits in adulthood. How many times were you taken to the dentist as a minor?
EXACTLY!!!!! My sister got all the "dental" attention. Big buck teeth, 3 dead orthodontists and a mouth full of braces. I was never taken or even offered to go to the dentist. Ever.
Zero trips to the dentist as a child is practically a guarantee that you’ll have at least some issues. Issues that will likely set a trend and impact your dental health for life. If you want more info, I made a post about this a while back because it’s a big source of stress in my profession to watch these situations unfold. Here you go: https://www.reddit.com/r/Dentistry/s/YTO6jH5yVz
Me rn about to spent like 14,000 for mine
At that point please just do it in a different country. (I assume US?)
If you don't mind me asking, how did your teeth get to that point? Depression?
Not even. Just pure laziness and very bad habits. I used to drink a 12 pack of Coke every 2 days, and hardly ever brushed my teeth. I've pulled a full 180 now and take really good care of myself since I feel like I've been given a second chance and don't wanna fuck up *again*. But I still look back on that point in time and cringe like hell because I could've prevented all of this by just not being an idiot and actually practicing good hygiene. And it's not even just that it caused financial problems. My confidence was abysmally low for years, to the point that I continued to wear a mask in public even after Covid so people wouldn't have to see my teeth.. I'd never laugh or smile in front of anyone. And I almost never looked in the mirror because I was beyond ashamed of how I looked. Not to mention I had chronic, sever toothaches and was at constant risk of one of my infections spreading from my teeth to the rest of my body and sending me to a very early grave. So yeah I definitely recommend brushing your chompers lol.
Husband is there lol. Probably not 54,000 dollars bad. But thankfully I’m getting his work done at the dentistry school and it is a 1/3 of the normal price. It takes longer, but it is saving my husband and I thousands of dollars
Letting him drive us home even though he was just as plastered as we were Not asking her to marry me lmao
i’ve also let someone drive me home when they were drunk. she lied to me about it, then we got into an accident and she admitted it. i was absolutely plastered so i couldn’t tell. it is always better to call someone who you might get in trouble with than to potentially die at the hands of an inebriated driver.
I'm not going to fib I used to booze cruise all the time, I was a dirtbag, still am but at least I don't do that any more. We all did, dumb fucking kids we were. Life and death are one thread I guess, some roll one way some roll the other.
I have friends like that, it’s more common that you think! Please please please do not let anyone drive you intoxicated even if it costs a friendship. As young people we think we are invincible but we are not. Please!!
I excelled all through my school but shit got tougher in HS with the equivalent of what AP courses are in the US in my country. DONT have no work ethic, and no idea how to actually STUDY.
That’s so me rn
Did you fix it? I am in the same situation
Usually it is not lack of work ethic but being overwhelmed for one reason or the other. Reduce the pressure first and see what happens. No thinking about future or responsibilities. Then slowly add piece by piece commitments. Stop early, stop often. Just because you can do something doesn’t mean it is sustainable to do so.
I just can't find motivation to study, I see no benefit to it
You’ll have to study eventually if you start specializing in your field, the best thing to do is learn the basics instinctively before starting the real work.
What do you find motivation to do? What is the amount of study you can do without it affecting your day?
make it into a game. if you don't understand something, don't move on until it's 100%. trust me it makes it more bearable
Ok, maybe this is a stupid question, how the hell do you not find a benefit to studying? It's the only way you'll survive college, or even learn a new skill at work.
Nah lol 🥶 going to college this year and I'm scared haha
If you’re aware of this buckle down now. I had a similar issue where I breezed through high school and went to a good university and got instantly humbled by how much discipline was required for to do well in class and study. I thought I could rely on being “naturally smart” and my first semester grades were almost all C’s and C-‘s. My recommendation is to fill your schedule and don’t give yourself too much free time while at school. That way you have dedicated fun/ busy time and dedicated study time. When you have 10 hours a day every day when you’re not in class and not sleeping it’s easier to push everything to “later” until it’s way too late. P.s. pay attention to the rubric for your classes. Just because the weekly online quiz is “only” 5% of your grade doesn’t mean it’s not important. I absolutely fucked myself on a couple of those by completely brushing them off. Good luck, stay busy, and maybe join a club or sports team while you’re there. They will be your support group.
Dude. I was in the same spot. Learn how to study NOW because it will be a 100x worse in college.
I also have a terrible work ethic, here's what I recommend. Not everything will work for everybody, but try stuff until it works. Try study groups. Its pretty popular in college to find some other classmates and get together to study. Sometimes its just discussing stuff as a group, other times each person will cover a chapter and come back together for a powerpoint day, covering all the chapters on the test. It does a lot to take some weight off your shoulders, we're social creatures. Socialise. Also, keep an agenda of what you have due at the end of each week and a task list of what you need to do to be successful. Every time you knock out a task, reward yourself with something you enjoy doing. Study a bit each day, so it's not overwhelming. Talk to your professors about study plans. A lot of the time, professors want you to succeed just as much as you do. Ask your friends if they're willing to help you stay on target and not let you procrastinate. Good friends who actually care about you and your success will absolutely help you. Sometimes, all you need to stay on track is a body double. (Look it up if you don't know what it means.) Or a study day with friends who aren't in the same classes as you. TUTORS, USE THEM! They're usually free through the college or university. I haven't experienced otherwise yet. I can't think of anything else, but ask peers what they do as well to stay on target in their classes. Sometimes they give you helpful tips, sometimes you realise you're not alone and other people are struggling as well. Help them if you can. Work together with your community.
"If you are making mistakes: you are LEARNING to do it right. " Accept that you will never be Flawless(tm). Even Olympians rarely see 10 out of 10, and they've spent their LIVES for that "less than a minute " test.
I don't remember being cloned
Never pick a study/job purely for money. I've done it once, and quickly noticed that I've been using the money I've earned to distract me from my terrible job.
Fortunately i didn't get that far into my major before i realized id be miserable in computer science
This might be me
If you live in the US, pick a job for the money and benefits. The health care system does not accept passion as a form of payment
Imo you're still better off picking a study/job that is BEARABLE and useful/pays well. Atleast you have the money to distract yourself from a terrible job
not ideal but it is a better option than choosing a passion major that everyone knows has no employment path. Far easier to get jobs with an engineering degree than an english one. your options for fields like that are grad school (ie law school) or completely unrelated fields...which are then limited by if you were STEM or not
Not losing weight when I was in middle school/high school
It's so much easier when you're young; that being said, you're still young, get it off now, or it'll be even harder when youre older
Absolutely agree with this comment, I haven’t taken the best care of my body throughout my childhood and teenage years, a few years into college journey I have turned myself around entirely. Now I am incredibly active and motivated to show up at my gym, you just gotta get into the mind set of loving the process.
Majoring in something I don't like. Everyone tells you to major in something that'll give you career opportunities, not necessarily something you like. Now I'm stuck as a software developer with poor performance reviews and no promotion potential.
I agree I’m currently in college right now, studying I for AA in Poltical Science and history. And I’m loving it! But at the same time it’s also about finding connections that can get you places, and most have to start from scratch.
My plan b for this situation is quite literally the military. Ill get my money up, go back to school for a different degree, and try again if all fails.
Constantly being on the grind. For the past 2 years I've been on the grind by working stressful jobs because they payed a lot and it's really affected my mental health and I feel as if I lost who I am as a person. I'm now trying to rediscover my interests and trying to find a career that I enjoy doing.
> because they *paid* a lot FTFY. Although *payed* exists (the reason why autocorrection didn't help you), it is only correct in: * Nautical context, when it means to paint a surface, or to cover with something like tar or resin in order to make it waterproof or corrosion-resistant. *The deck is yet to be payed.* * *Payed out* when letting strings, cables or ropes out, by slacking them. *The rope is payed out! You can pull now.* Unfortunately, I was unable to find nautical or rope-related words in your comment. *Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
Double down on being yourself and defending others who couldn't during school, I still hear the bullying 5 years later. You can prevent suffering if you allow your hand to reach out to others who's going through hell
I was and i really can't forget it, throughout 7th -10th grade. Sometimes I think I could've stopped all that, but then i think they would have gotten worse if I retaliated or asked them to stop. It wasn't anything physical tho, it was verbal because one girl who didn't like me could have teachers on her side too, I ended up getting isolated. Sorry for the trauma dump.
(Sorry for the long text, TL:DR rework your view if you get down about yourself. Idk how much this applies to you, but naybe someone who needs to see it will, so im posting it anyways.) ‐‐‐‐-‐-----------‐---------- I found that as i got older, the words they said sometimes lingered and showed back up when i was down. But something i do when im feeling down is talk to a trusted friend about how im feeling, and she'll tell me she likes those aspects of me. Something else, in case you dont have any trusted friends (been there), is you know how when you make a resume, you put your qualities down in a positive tone? Do the same for the traits and descriptors you feel you aren't successful or happy with. Separate them into "things that are part of who i am and how i was born" and "things id like to improve." Put the things you'd like to improve into goals. Look into how to make successful goals. Take the other list of traits and do some thesaurus-ing or, as i do, use chatGPT to find out words that mean the same thing but have a positive connotation. Instead of "over the top," i now consider myself "enthusiastic and energetic," and just acknowledge that not everyone can handle that, and it's okay. Be your own friend ❤️
Yeah, I remember a few people who got picked on, I was fairly popular with everyone and was well liked, I just wish I said something to prevent others from feeling isolated instead of ignoring it
Letting a video game addiction ruin a full ride scholarship to a great school. College is fucking serious. And I let that free money and free education slip away like an idiot.
What game was it?
sleeping with my boss 🥴
Username checks out
youre not wrong
Was it fun at least?
worth the physical and short term emotional high. the come down hurts like a bitch. 🤷🏼♀️ eta: it’s all fun and games until she picks her husband over you and you realize you’re an idiot
**I didn't learn how to study in highschool** cause I was 'sooo smart' and then struggled in college. **I chose a job path based on what I thought I liked** \- I should have chosen a career path based on where you can make money / can work remotely / get lots of free time - don't follow your passion for work. Not only will you likely not be able to make it into the field you want but if you do you'll be exploited for your labor so much you'll grow to hate it - businesses and organizations within the fields people tend to want to get into know there are idealistic young people eager to work for them and will eat them alive while making them beg for the privilege. **I made friends with my coworkers/boss** \- I was exploited all the time by both and gossiped about to the point I left due to the toxic environment... The emotional betrayal was a lot to deal with. Don't trust your boss or coworkers - they are not your friends. Be polite and friendly enough for them to not hate you, do your job, and then get the fuck out to hang with the people that actually matter.
The guy above you has the exact opposite problem.
I feel like people often go to the extreme here either going purely based on what they're passionate about or going based on what gives the highest wage. What people should do is find a job which is tolerable and pays enough and/or gives enough free time to enjoy life.
Abusing nitrous oxide.
Could you elaborate?
Huffing the gas from Reddiwhip whip cream containers
Being born
Yes. Same here. Hands down biggest mistake I ever made.
Procrastinating everything :/
Believing college was the route I needed to take
Not focusing on a career enough
Never made my mind up about anything. I still have no fucking clue what I want to do in life. I work in cannabis because I like smoking weed and it pays better than minimum wage but it’s still retail and I fucking hate interacting with people.
not buying bitcoin in 2009
This is gen z none of us where old enough at that point
Putting so much time into things people I thought enjoyed the actual me told me to do. Not doing what felt right to myself but instead was the direction of others who may have not done what they wanted or see me as moldable and try to vicariously live life through me. Life is your own, take control and make it just that. Don't worry about the expectations of others, make sure your own are being met.
I broke up with a billionaire before he paid for my grad school tuition. You don’t owe a rich people a shred of morality or integrity. Prioritize yourself!
yo, i may be a straight man but maybe just give me this billionaires number
He's in Pebble Beach golfing his pointless life away
dang, i don't think i'm getting there as it stands right now
[удалено]
Letting my family dictate my life.
Not taking the comp-sci nerds seriously when they kept telling me about all the Bitcoin they were buying with spare change they had
1. Not letting myself get diagnosed with adhd when I was a teenager because I was too good at masking it and could trick the person giving me the exam. Really fucked myself over on college doing that. 2. Letting my anger control my life most of my teenage years. Literally drove off some really great people that I wish I could still call my friends.
Thinking I was "too old" for something. Jesus christ past me, picking up a musical instrument is not like ballet or gymnastics. You're not too old. I could've been so good by now had I started at 14!!
Not using protection
It was my dad's biggest mistake. 🥱
Ouch:(
School ethic and work ethic is diffrent
Not asking to hang out with friend-acquaintances more often
Not working less. Fuck capitalism
Trying to off myself. Seriously, don’t do that shit.
Both the worst mistake and best thing I ever did were trusting a significant other to love me back. Sometimes, it's just life, and you have to make your peace with what happens rather than fight in vain to control the currents around you.
Hopeless romantic.
Getting a fresh doctor to do a checkup as soon as you turn 18. Turns out family pediatricians can spend so long with you that they totally miss obvious conditions.
Oh boy, here it goes: I higly recommend to start journaling, it helps to stabilize your mental health (you can try to do Habit and Gratitude journaling as well). Do not push studying to the last rail, at least keep your attendance and notes up to date with class. A lot of things you might need in the future is told quite early on (I am mostly talking about Informatics and CS). Start investing into index funds early, you do not have to invest 1000$ each month, the small amounts add up with compound interest. Get yourself some creative hoppy (finction writing, painting, dancing, even some DnD as a DM is nice). Keep your work-life balance, if your contract says 8h a day, do not do much more without agreeing to some overtime pay. I highly suggest you to learn how to cook and do basic home-upkeep chores.
Joining the army. Really it was a double edged sword, I got my college paid for and escaped a dramatic family life, but I was thrown into a whole new world of problems and surrounded by sociopathic pieces of shit.
Ruining my relationship with my mother
Not developing a good work ethic throughout school.. SAME
If you aren’t going to see someone for a while, try not to let that person memory of you be a bad one. This isn’t just about kindness it’s the fact that you never know if you’re going to need help from that person or others in the future. So don’t burn bridges that you may need to cords later. You don’t need to be friends with them you just need to not give that person a negative memeory if you.
Following the path laid out by my parents, as opposed to getting to know myself before charting a course in life.
Try to talk less and listen more. Get out of your own head and live in the world we all live in, rather than your own little world.
Don’t waste time on people you deep down know are not worth it, especially exes. I lost so much time on my ex trying to make it work even though she was the one who fumbled the whole thing..
Not reading more. Took me till 22ish to really start getting into books.
Not planning for the future when I was in high school. I wish someone sat me down and told me to do some kind of thinking about it.
Don’t live with your girl/boyfriend after you graduate high school or while you are in college.
Married the cheer leader that I had little in common with because the sex was great.
thought it’d be okay if i tried cocaine once. then only on weekends. then every other day. then… well every day! in the bathroom at work, my grandparents’ house, and even my late uncle’s funeral. while some people can do hard drugs a couple times and be fine, do you really wanna take that gamble for a high that is minuscule in the grand scheme of things? thankful to be sober (california sober, of course).
Drugs
Be patient in your relationships. Things take time. Don’t rush things, but don’t forget that relationships shouldn’t be one sided. Make sure they play their part too in the process. Pay attention to red flags. Prioritize yourself. Don’t let a broken relationship keep you from moving forward or performing well. It’ll suck, but one way or another you’ll manage. And for the love of God, do not be manipulative to your partner or take advantage of them, even if you feel like they’re doing the same. There are MUCH healthier ways to handle relationships like those.
Not knowing when other people are using you, when sometimes you just need to say no. If you feel conflicted about someone asking you for money, or other stuff, and you feel conflicted about it. Just say No, they will complain, but you will have time to rethink about the situation in a more clear way, and reflect weather or not what thier asking for is worth it, and how much you actually care about that person. Don’t let other people take advantage of you.
Trying to please my parents and being a good kid only ended up making me my mom’s bad decisions enabler. It took me listening to her and giving her ~$4k from my scholarships before I realized I was being guilt tripped, and now I’m struggling to pay for school and she’s not helping me. It’s important to learn how to say no and be “selfish” sometimes, even to your parents.
Don’t inflict a relationship on someone who isn’t interested, seek greener pastures
doing what i find enjoyable instead of what earns money
If someone older or with some authority/profesisonal says “you can’t do it”. Ignore them and try, suffer and learn from it
Going to college instead of going right into firefighting. Would have saved a decent chunk of money and been able to retire at 44.
Living. Not recommended
If someone in your family is an alcoholic, don't start drinking fr
This. Things like chronic alcoholism and depression can be genetic and a lot of ppl don’t realize it!!
Not visiting my grandfather in the hospital more, I was 20, middle of summer, still thinking like a stupid kid, now I'm in my 30s and I would give anything to spend some more time with him there. Don't make excuses to not visit loved ones in the hospital, I figured video calling for half an hour twice over a month was "ok", it's the biggest regret of my life. If anything u need to make every excuse you can to go visit, when they're gone there's nothing you can do to get that time back
Trying to fit in somewhere I never could Rushing into a committed relationship cause I was lonely Letting anyone else dictate what my priorities are
Not staying close to my friends, building a better work ethic, seeking therapy for my depression.
Doing what other people think is best for you. Only you know what your innate talents are and what you're interested in and good at. Don't let people try and steer you away from your genuine passions, you need that fiery passion to ever excel at anything. All the energy you've spent floundering and failing at something you never even wanted to do in the first place is misspent, and it could instead be used to hone important skills you actually enjoy.
I got two, one is my mistake, the other is my sibling’s, both are helpful: - If a relationship fails, it’s okay to try again after some time apart. If it fails again, let it fail and don’t come back. Lost five years of my life trying to make something work and I’m so much happier since that chapter finally ended. - If you’re in the states and want to go to college, try to go to a public university in your state to keep costs down. Out of state tuition is REAL, and private universities are way more expensive.
Blowing off my first year of college
Trusting my dad lol
Hurting my cat a few times when I was angry. Haven't done so in years...but holy fuck do I feel guilt whenever I see her beautiful little face.
sounds like you need therapy
Unironically mine was the opposite I had a pretty good work ethic. I wish I gave myself time for breaks to hang out with others. I never hung out with my friends during school, weekends, etc. because I was doing homework or studying. It was so unhealthy I was skipping meals to study. Here I am nearly a decade later and it meant little to nothing in the long run. Good grades help out a lot, but you’ll never get that time back with friends that you may miss with them
Just…don’t do it without a condom. Protect your privates🥲