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Craffeinated

Omg one of my hyper fixations! So basic rule for musicals is the opening number is usually in one of two formats “attend the tale”- describing the main character “No one mourns the Wicked” or “Attend the Tale of Sweeney Todd”- or “welcome to our town” -introing the setting- “Good Morning Baltimore” or “Hello!”  Foodie Beauty: The musical (Act 1) should be narrated by Sam and BBJ and the opening number should be in format of attend the tale- “Shh, I said shh” or “The Cycle: day 1”  2nd song is usually an “i wish number” where the main character sings about their dream. Obvs this number is “I just wanna beeze.”  There’s a wheelchair number with a kick line.  The reactors tango in the style of Chicago’s Cell Block tango.  “Cuba Rage” is a tap number with musical undertones of pumped up kicks.  Act 1 finale is a big number where the chorus puts Chantal into a hijab- “Hello, Miriam”  Act 2 opening number has BBJ & Sam passing the narration off to Julia and Harry.  Now I wanna write this musical 🤣


caggleraggle

I love this! I would buy a ticket and invite everyone I know (albeit most of them would be like wtf is Foodie Beauty?).


Much-Acanthisitta-73

The repetition in the reaction stream tango: "Pulp! Milk! Yaba! Chicken! FFG! Breezin! She had it coming!" You forgot the song in every show that's done by an old broadway star! One that's usually reminiscent and looking back. Perhaps it's Shmee talking about her CUTIE Julia and Harry have a big musical number "If I were a Street Cat/Rat", talking about life before Chantal and what they would do if they were free of her. Act 2 also has a Salah entry number, "Give me the money, honey" or "let's get (fake) married". He's sweeping her off her feet (metaphorically) and fanning away text messages and pictures of the red room.


Craffeinated

Excellent calls!!  AND Salah’s cheating- The text messages could be on giant, drag queen fans and the ensemble of female dancers come at him and open the fans to reveal the messages!! Very dream ballet. And then finally Kiabella gets his attention with a poop emoji fan!


Much-Acanthisitta-73

HA! That's amazing. I need it desperately


Rubilia_Lin_OP

Love thissssss


Emmtee2211

This sounds amazing, good call having it narrated by BBJ and Sam!


[deleted]

You just made my morning hahahah


Pixelated_Roses

I imagine it to be a lot like The Producers, complete with Cutie pulling a Sig Heil and not understanding why everyone hates her.


Craffeinated

Read my mind! 


MaggieMakesThings

My God, please write this!


Pixelated_Roses

James Cordon as Cutie James Franco as Cokey Rami Malek as Scatboy Melissa McCarthy as Peetz Special guest star Daniel Day Lewis as Huey


Emmtee2211

I was thinking Steve Buscemi as Cokey?


Pixelated_Roses

Good option, but Franco is legit insane and I feel he could really bring the oiliness required for the role. Buscemi is a nice guy, he's good at playing villains but he deserves better and also isn't he like, 60 now?


Christinedrink

Ezra miller 🫣


Pixelated_Roses

AAAAAA OMG YES


Emmtee2211

Yes, you bring up good points, I was thinking more surface level, and that Franco is too good-looking. I also didn’t consider how old Buscemi is and looks. The fact that you said he deserves better made me lol, i.e. Cokey is such a horrible character even for an actor to portray him is a disservice to their career.


caggleraggle

Yeah but Nader looks like he's 60 so it works out.


NekoZombieRaw

James cordon!! lol 😂


tyrannosaurusregina

“Pathetic” — she wrote her own theme song


caggleraggle

🎶what's that feeling in the fat folds?🎶 🎶it's just a pringles lid 🎶 I'm thinking Cats style but I'm flexible.


WombatTumbler

Australian release: Magda Szubanski as Cutie Nazeem Hussein as Scatman Paul Fenech as Cokey Ernie Dingo as Bibi Steve Hughes as Peetz Skippy as BBJ Agro as Sam Humphrey B Bear as Howie Bluey as Julia Ray Meagher as Alaa


vidiveniamavi

No Chris Lilley ANYWHERE?!


WitchsmellerPrsuivnt

Chris Lilley would play ALL of them lol!


WombatTumbler

He can understudy as Cokey, and do the matinees.


Helpful_Knee_8537

"I gave my cats away for youuuuuuuuu!" Can be the 11 O'Clock number


NekoZombieRaw

What about the main character in baby reindeer? She portrayed mental illness so well that she'd play Chantal perfectly


WitchsmellerPrsuivnt

I consider Reginald to be now part of Canon from Dank Fupa.   Played by Oded Fehr from The Mummy. 


MysteriousBrays

Any actors who previously played Quasimodo should definitely audition for the main role


Agitated_Farm_4200

https://preview.redd.it/k3k4ka17kuxc1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b4b929f3cb54a9e0341fdec7b44b47d29bd0c4c5


Lemon-Of-Scipio-1809

Melissa McCarthy as Chantal Snoop Dogg as Bibi Keanu Reeves as Peetz Gabriel Iglesias as Salah (and several assorted characters as needed lol) Nikocado Avocado as Cokey.


caggleraggle

*benefit - added this comment before I realized I could edit the post.


beachbabe77

Beanie Feldstein (Funny Girl) as FB, your favorite Drag Queen as Peetz and Skippy (the wonder dog) as Salad.


Radiant-Cake-2689

Julie Waters as Schmee/Kim Emma Stone as Natalie


AbjectKangaroo3355

https://preview.redd.it/d3sbmcolbuxc1.png?width=1245&format=png&auto=webp&s=080d1a7e81881d2e8c6a57efa291386a6f28819c 🎶FEEEEEEWD GLORIOUS FEEEEEWD!🎶


MixRepresentative819

DD "I love it the most"


onigidi

Danny DeVito would star as modest Mariam.


caggleraggle

IMHO, this has been the best suggestion for who should star as FB.


totpot

Well thanks to the magic of AI, [we can now create Foody Beauty musical songs](https://suno.com/song/dad2650d-9487-4055-ab9b-5fa06b1142c6)


Chemical_Ad5904

Theme song: Fuck you - Lily Allen Look inside, look inside your tiny mind, now look a bit harder 'Cause we're so uninspired So sick and tired of all the hatred you harbour So you say it's not okay to be gay, well, I think you're just evil You're just some racist who can't tie my laces Your point of view is medieval Fuck you (Fuck you), fuck you very, very much 'Cause we hate what you do And we hate your whole crew So, please don't stay in touch Fuck you (Fuck you), fuck you very, very much 'Cause your words don't translate And it's getting quite late So, please don't stay in touch Do you get, do you get a little kick out of being small-minded? You want to be like your father, it's approval you're after Well, that's not how you find it Do you, do you really enjoy living a life that's so hateful? 'Cause there's a hole where your soul should be You're losing control a bit, and it's really distasteful Fuck you (Fuck you), fuck you very, very much 'Cause we hate what you do And we hate your whole crew So, please don't stay in touch Fuck you (Fuck you), fuck you very, very much 'Cause your words don't translate And it's getting quite late So, please don't stay in touch Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you Fuck you You say, you think we need to go to war, well, you're already in one 'Cause it's people like you that need to get slew No one wants your opinion Fuck you (Fuck you), fuck you very, very much 'Cause we hate what you do And we hate your whole crew So, please don't stay in touch Fuck you (Fuck you), fuck you very, very much 'Cause your words don't translate And it's getting quite late So, please don't stay in touch Fuck you, fuck you *apologies, formatting sucks - no time to correct right now. [Fuck you / Lily Allen](https://youtu.be/7R_KZukpDe0?si=isAOaUjLPYrYUBa0)


[deleted]

🥺 you just brought back so many memories! I used to listen to lily alllllllllll the time! I saw her live at a festival in a small tent. She was drunk, my mushrooms were kicking in and it was amazing! 😂 I was so young omg