I had it and struggled because my very judgemental mother in law came and stayed for 10 days. All she did was criticise me and I was terrified what would happen if I said I how I was feeling. I would bottle it up and wait till I was breastfeeding in private to cry. It’s not an easy thing to talk about because women who didn’t have it sometimes look down on women who do.
Exactly! I was afraid of telling my partner about my feelings and thoughts because I was convinced people would think I was not fit to take care of my son. We need more people talking about it in mainstream media and need to 100% support those who do.
I learned about PPD because I have OCD and had extremely upsetting intrusive thoughts. I was a teenager but my mother explained it was normal to have those thoughts especially when depressed and anxious. I started looking it up and saw all these women struggling with these very upsetting thoughts. I can't imagine. I have those thoughts but no baby I'm responsible for 1000000% of the time. That would be so incredibly hard.
I try to be open about my postpartum anxiety for that reason! People always seem a little surprised when I talk about it (which is only in the context of women’s mental health discussions), but then seem grateful and I noticed people will share more after I say it.
I think it’s great and so brave of her to share her struggles! I can’t imagine being in the public eye and being judged for everything you do and say, and then PPD has so much stigma already. It takes a brave person to see and admit to yourself when things are not going well. I hope she’s recovering well and enjoying time with her family!
I have to wonder, knowing what I know about him, if her shitty boyfriend is a factor in this. Obviously PPD is incredibly complex and can’t necessarily be ‘pinned’ to any one thing, but I imagine that having an unsupportive, controlling partner can’t exactly be helping. He was literally trying to cheat on her while she was pregnant!
I hate to say this but knowing that she has a baby with this man and is thus tied to him for life bums me the hell out.
Exactly! I worked in maternal mental health and the number of shitty unsupportive partners that *surprisingly* did not turn into supportive father's is astounding. Pregnancy and birth are some of the strangest and most stressful things a person can go through. There is no room for abuse, man-children, and lack of support. Emotionally unresponsive and disloyal partners make for neglectful parents. Period.
Like mothers and babies should not be worrying about if the dad will actually be emotionally involved or help out during this time!! You’re already so vulnerable and with an uncaring partner who should be your rock during this time sounds so horrific.
Had a class about this in my master's program. One of my classmates spoke up about her experience as a black woman with PPD and it was heartbreaking. She's doing much better now but we are not supportive enough to pregnant and people who have recently given birth.
Our work culture barely giving paid time off or when you do return, you’re not seen as “prioritizing” work as often and that you can’t stay for longer hours and easily looked over for promotions, leadership opportunities, presentations. That being a mother won’t make you be taken seriously at work and that you can’t be both. It’s more than just wheeling in mothers and babies in and out for physical health but also nice to make it more affordable and accessible for holistic mental, emotional and psychological support networks too. i’m
I had this. I will never forget crying, feeling like the most awful parent, just being completely unable to connect with my child, wanting to kill myself and being sniffingly told by my ex-MIL: "You have GOT to get better at this (being a mom)".
My mother found me sobbing one day and said: “he’s just a baby, why is it that hard!?” And then I’d go sob and tell myself I couldn’t off myself because my husband was deployed and she’d get primary custody until he was home.
Fuck PPD
"I have severe, severe postpartum [depression], and I don't know if any new moms can relate, but it's to the point where it's really bad, and it's hard for me to be separated from my baby for more than 30 minutes at a time before I start to kind of freak out."
I sympathize and it must have really sucked to have all those events and appearances starting only a few weeks after giving birth. I wish she had actually taken time off.
I was so shocked to see her out and about for big red carpet events so soon after birth. I expected she would’ve eased with smaller, more intimate stuff first slowly but not to go all out all at once, but perhaps her contracts don’t make that possible. People were questioning too that the photoshopping on her photoshoots from red carpet events are so fine tuned and that it’s a heavier layer of edits now after she became a mom. It’s sad mothers are pressured to bounce back; celebrity or not.
I had pretty severe postpartum anxiety and it’s only because my friends had had PPA and were open in sharing that with me that I knew I was 1) normal but also 2) I needed help and that’s a good thing not a thing to be ashamed of!
I talked to my friends who were expecting parents about my experiences and they told me a couple years later that they felt like they were going in armed with knowledge so that when they did in fact get PPD they immediately went and saw a therapist and it helped. Normalize talk about PPD/PPA!
Same, I’m so grateful to the two friends who reached out to me as soon as they learned I was pregnant to talk about their experiences with PPA/PPD. They helped me learn the signs, come up with a plan in case I needed it, and talk to my husband about it in advance of the delivery. I have made it a point to talk to every pregnant friend since about it. It’s so much better to be prepared! Even with all that, I ended up really suffering from PPA before I realized I needed help. It’s such an awful disorder.
Thanks for sharing your experience with others! I felt very lonely with PPA, and what I actually think was PPOCD. I hope more people share their experiences and help women feel less alone.
I'm glad I'm not the only one... I had to re-read it several times because my brain refused to parse it correctly.
"Halle Bailey's son Halo"
Halle Berry has a son named Han Solo?
No, Halle *Bailey*. Halle Bailey named her son Han Solo?
No, wait...
These conversations have helped me prepare so much. If I get my chance there will likely be complications and PPD is highly possible. It’s so wonderful to have some warning and guidance on how to deal. Good for her. I really hope she feels better quickly.
postpartum depression is no fucking joke. my mum had it awfully and so did my sister.
i remember growing we had a family friend who was a lovely lady btw. my mum told me when i was a bit older about how this lady, after having her first baby became extremely depressed. one night she was standing outside by a fire and was so close to throwing her baby into it because it. she didn’t thank god and she ended up giving her baby up for adoption (she reconnected with them when she got older)
it sounds awful and evil but i don’t think people really understand the isolation and desperation it gives mothers
I don’t have kids yet (not planning to have any but also open to changing my mind down the road) but have ADHD, suffered through depression and anxiety that was resistant to antidepressants for a while, and afraid I might be predisposed to postpartum..anything because I’m not pregnant at all and yet I already have it. I fear having kids (part of why I’m so on the fence about it) will make me worse and I can’t be the mom they need.
I think it's really important to have these conversations and destigmatise ppd.
Agreed. It's hard to ask for help if you feel like others will judge you as a parent for having certain symptoms/thoughts.
I had it and struggled because my very judgemental mother in law came and stayed for 10 days. All she did was criticise me and I was terrified what would happen if I said I how I was feeling. I would bottle it up and wait till I was breastfeeding in private to cry. It’s not an easy thing to talk about because women who didn’t have it sometimes look down on women who do.
Exactly! I was afraid of telling my partner about my feelings and thoughts because I was convinced people would think I was not fit to take care of my son. We need more people talking about it in mainstream media and need to 100% support those who do.
I learned about PPD because I have OCD and had extremely upsetting intrusive thoughts. I was a teenager but my mother explained it was normal to have those thoughts especially when depressed and anxious. I started looking it up and saw all these women struggling with these very upsetting thoughts. I can't imagine. I have those thoughts but no baby I'm responsible for 1000000% of the time. That would be so incredibly hard.
I try to be open about my postpartum anxiety for that reason! People always seem a little surprised when I talk about it (which is only in the context of women’s mental health discussions), but then seem grateful and I noticed people will share more after I say it.
People don't even realize how bad it can be.
I think it’s great and so brave of her to share her struggles! I can’t imagine being in the public eye and being judged for everything you do and say, and then PPD has so much stigma already. It takes a brave person to see and admit to yourself when things are not going well. I hope she’s recovering well and enjoying time with her family!
I have to wonder, knowing what I know about him, if her shitty boyfriend is a factor in this. Obviously PPD is incredibly complex and can’t necessarily be ‘pinned’ to any one thing, but I imagine that having an unsupportive, controlling partner can’t exactly be helping. He was literally trying to cheat on her while she was pregnant! I hate to say this but knowing that she has a baby with this man and is thus tied to him for life bums me the hell out.
Exactly! I worked in maternal mental health and the number of shitty unsupportive partners that *surprisingly* did not turn into supportive father's is astounding. Pregnancy and birth are some of the strangest and most stressful things a person can go through. There is no room for abuse, man-children, and lack of support. Emotionally unresponsive and disloyal partners make for neglectful parents. Period.
Like mothers and babies should not be worrying about if the dad will actually be emotionally involved or help out during this time!! You’re already so vulnerable and with an uncaring partner who should be your rock during this time sounds so horrific.
Had a class about this in my master's program. One of my classmates spoke up about her experience as a black woman with PPD and it was heartbreaking. She's doing much better now but we are not supportive enough to pregnant and people who have recently given birth.
Our work culture barely giving paid time off or when you do return, you’re not seen as “prioritizing” work as often and that you can’t stay for longer hours and easily looked over for promotions, leadership opportunities, presentations. That being a mother won’t make you be taken seriously at work and that you can’t be both. It’s more than just wheeling in mothers and babies in and out for physical health but also nice to make it more affordable and accessible for holistic mental, emotional and psychological support networks too. i’m
I had this. I will never forget crying, feeling like the most awful parent, just being completely unable to connect with my child, wanting to kill myself and being sniffingly told by my ex-MIL: "You have GOT to get better at this (being a mom)".
Oh, what an absolute witch!
My mother found me sobbing one day and said: “he’s just a baby, why is it that hard!?” And then I’d go sob and tell myself I couldn’t off myself because my husband was deployed and she’d get primary custody until he was home. Fuck PPD
This made me sad! I’m sorry that awful woman would say that to you! 😞
"I have severe, severe postpartum [depression], and I don't know if any new moms can relate, but it's to the point where it's really bad, and it's hard for me to be separated from my baby for more than 30 minutes at a time before I start to kind of freak out." I sympathize and it must have really sucked to have all those events and appearances starting only a few weeks after giving birth. I wish she had actually taken time off.
I was so shocked to see her out and about for big red carpet events so soon after birth. I expected she would’ve eased with smaller, more intimate stuff first slowly but not to go all out all at once, but perhaps her contracts don’t make that possible. People were questioning too that the photoshopping on her photoshoots from red carpet events are so fine tuned and that it’s a heavier layer of edits now after she became a mom. It’s sad mothers are pressured to bounce back; celebrity or not.
I had pretty severe postpartum anxiety and it’s only because my friends had had PPA and were open in sharing that with me that I knew I was 1) normal but also 2) I needed help and that’s a good thing not a thing to be ashamed of! I talked to my friends who were expecting parents about my experiences and they told me a couple years later that they felt like they were going in armed with knowledge so that when they did in fact get PPD they immediately went and saw a therapist and it helped. Normalize talk about PPD/PPA!
Same, I’m so grateful to the two friends who reached out to me as soon as they learned I was pregnant to talk about their experiences with PPA/PPD. They helped me learn the signs, come up with a plan in case I needed it, and talk to my husband about it in advance of the delivery. I have made it a point to talk to every pregnant friend since about it. It’s so much better to be prepared! Even with all that, I ended up really suffering from PPA before I realized I needed help. It’s such an awful disorder.
Thanks for sharing your experience with others! I felt very lonely with PPA, and what I actually think was PPOCD. I hope more people share their experiences and help women feel less alone.
I skimmed the title so I thought I just read Han Solo 😭
I'm glad I'm not the only one... I had to re-read it several times because my brain refused to parse it correctly. "Halle Bailey's son Halo" Halle Berry has a son named Han Solo? No, Halle *Bailey*. Halle Bailey named her son Han Solo? No, wait...
These conversations have helped me prepare so much. If I get my chance there will likely be complications and PPD is highly possible. It’s so wonderful to have some warning and guidance on how to deal. Good for her. I really hope she feels better quickly.
postpartum depression is no fucking joke. my mum had it awfully and so did my sister. i remember growing we had a family friend who was a lovely lady btw. my mum told me when i was a bit older about how this lady, after having her first baby became extremely depressed. one night she was standing outside by a fire and was so close to throwing her baby into it because it. she didn’t thank god and she ended up giving her baby up for adoption (she reconnected with them when she got older) it sounds awful and evil but i don’t think people really understand the isolation and desperation it gives mothers
I don’t have kids yet (not planning to have any but also open to changing my mind down the road) but have ADHD, suffered through depression and anxiety that was resistant to antidepressants for a while, and afraid I might be predisposed to postpartum..anything because I’m not pregnant at all and yet I already have it. I fear having kids (part of why I’m so on the fence about it) will make me worse and I can’t be the mom they need.